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拋開過去, 做你喜歡的自己

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【阿德勒心理學】最佳解說應用讀本

重要的不是你有些什麼,而是如何運用你所擁有的東西。
你不需要變得特別,只要做好你喜歡的自己;
你不必被過去羈絆,因為人生永遠都有選擇的可能性。

當我們可以放下過去,以往的種種就不會再糾纏自己,我們和某些人相處的時空才不會凝固在最糟的地方,而會重新開始流動,今天的這段時間,也不再是昨天的重複及延長。
將此時此刻當成全新的開始,就會有許多新的發現,感受到不同的自己。

208 pages, Paperback

First published September 15, 1999

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About the author

Ichiro Kishimi

81 books1,020 followers
Ichiro KISHIMI Philosopher, Adlerian psychologist and translator of English and German languages. Born in 1956.

M.A.in philosophy from Kyoto University. Director of the Japanese Society of Adlerian psychology. Former counselor at Maeda Clinic in Kyoto and has taught philosophy and ancient Greek at various institutions such as Kyoto University of Education and Nara Women's University.

He presently teaches educational psychology and clinical psychology at Meiji School of Oriental Medicine in Suita, Osaka. Kishimi now has his own private counseling office in Kameoka, Kyoto, and devotes his time to giving lectures on Adlerian Psychology and child education.

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4 reviews
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December 10, 2025
Highlights ✨
• A person becomes an individual only within a social—interpersonal—context.
• Feelings of love emerge where good communication exists.
• When people cannot accept being “ordinary,” they try to make themselves “special.”
• Sharing joy and expressing your feelings can be an act of encouragement.
Try saying things like “thank you,” “I’m happy,” or “that really helped me,” even for small acts we tend to overlook as normal.

My own reflections after digesting the theory:
I often find myself seeing the world through a hierarchical lens, and sometimes that leads to subtle power struggles even with my partner or family.
People who genuinely aim to treat others as equals do not speak in ways that belittle anyone.

The power of saying thank you.
The importance of actually voicing “I’m happy.”
By respecting the other person, I want to express things like:
• “Seeing how hard you work makes me happy—it motivates me to try harder too. Thank you 😊”


From an educational standpoint, this is something I’d like to come back to and read again in the future ✨

And about future
I decide my own future.
Who I am now is acting toward the person I want to become.
→ I feel tired because my body is telling me it needs rest.
→ I’m in a position to leave my current job because I want to work in a new world.

ハイライト✨
・個人はただ社会的な(対人関係的な)文脈においてだけ個人となる
・いいコミュニケーションがあるところに愛の感情は生まれる
・普通であることを受け入れることができないと人は特別であろうとする
・喜びを共有すること、自分の気持ちを伝えることは勇気づけになります。当たり前だと思って見逃しがちな行為に対して「ありがとう」とか、「うれしい」とか「助かった」といってみる

理論を自分なりに考えて咀嚼したことは以下
どうしても自分を縦社会の一部として見てしまい、パートナーや家族ともマウントの取り合いになってしまう時がある。対等に付き合うことを心がけている人は人を見下す言い分をしない。
ありがとうの言葉の大きさ。嬉しいと口に出してみる。相手をリスペクトし、下記を言ってみる
・あなたが頑張っているところをみて嬉しい、わたしもがんばろうとおもう。ありがとう😊
教育面では、もう一度将来戻って読んでみたい✨
そして、自分の将来は自分で決める。今の自分はこうなりたいという目的の上で行動している→休養をとりたいから体が疲れていると感じる。もっと新しい世界で仕事をしたいから辞める状況にある
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