Living in a Godly Marriage

Deepen Your Christian Life

by Joel R. Beeke, James A. La Belle, Derek W.H. Thomas (Forward)

The Puritans believed that godly marriages were foundational for the future life of families, churches, and nations. Therefore, they wrote prolifically on the subject of marriage, seeking to bring biblical reformation to this subject in a comprehensive way. Martin Luther, John Calvin, and other previous Reformers had begun this task, but the Puritans took it much further, writing a number of detailed treatises on how to live as godly spouses. Out of the wealth of material available to us from the seventeenth century, Joel R. Beeke and James A. La Belle have gathered together insights from the past and summarized them in a contemporary form in order to encourage modern day coupled to glorify God in marriage.

Table of Contents:

1.The Institution and Honor of Marriage
2.The Purposes and Benefits of Marriage
3.Securing a Good Entrance into Marriage
4.Preserving the Honor of Marriage
5.The Mutual Duties of Love and Chastity
6.The Mutual Duties of Help and Peace
7.The Wife’s Duties in Marriage
8.The Husband’s Duty of Love
9.The Husband’s Duty of Authority
10.Concluding Counsel
Appendix: George Swinnock’s Prayers for Husbands and Wives

Deepen Your Christian Life

From the late 1500s to the early 1700s, Puritan ministers wrote thousands of Christian books that contain massive amounts of biblical, doctrinal, experiential, and practical instruction to energize your Christian life. In the early seventeenth century, nearly 20 percent of the material coming off English presses consisted of Puritan sermon material popularized in book form. Unfortunately, many believers today find it difficult to read the antiquarian Puritan language and, when they attempt to do so, find themselves more frustrated than energized.

This series, Deepen Your Christian Life, presents in contemporary language the major teachings that several Puritans wrote on subjects that are seldom addressed adequately, if at all, today. Finally, you too will be able to enjoy the Puritans and see, by the Spirit’s grace, that they really do energize your Christian life.

Genres: Marriage, Christianity, Theology, Christian, Nonfiction, Christian Living, Family

336 pages, Paperback

Published May 1, 2016

About the author

Dr. Joel R. Beeke serves as President and Professor of Systematic Theology, Church History, and Homiletics at Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary. He has been in the ministry since 1978 and has served as a pastor of his current church, Heritage Reformed Congregation, since 1986. He is also editor of the Banner of Sovereign Grace Truth, editorial director of Reformation Heritage Books, president of Inheritance Publishers, and vice-president of the Dutch Reformed Translation Society. He has written, co-authored, or edited fifty books and contributed over fifteen hundred articles to Reformed books, journals, periodicals, and encyclopedias. His Ph.D. (1988) from Westminster Theological Seminary is in Reformation and Post-Reformation Theology. He is frequently called upon to lecture at Reformed seminaries and to speak at conferences around the world. He and his wife, Mary, have three children: Calvin, Esther, and Lydia.

Reviews

[Becky Pliego · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really enjoyed this one.

[Zack · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good. Would recommend for:
A) anyone wanting to understand the Puritan view of marriage
B) serious-minded and spiritually mature Christians in pre-marital counseling
C) thoughtful Christians wanting to read a good book on marriage

[Claire W · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very in-depth, Biblical, and grounded in the Puritans' rich outlook on the Christian life. Every page is full of Scripture and quotes to underline and reference again and again. It covers the Biblical foundation of marriage given by God, mutual duties in marriage, and also individual duties. Highly recommend! I find my mindset has grown in understanding the beauty of God's design in marriage and its purpose for our sanctification and to give glory to our Lord.

[Abigail Scanlon · Rating 5 out of 5]

beautiful! very good biblical thoughts on marriage. so much food for thought!

this book kind of reads like a shirley english grammar essay written by a fifth year mdiv, but in the best way.

[Sean McGowan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good

[Tyler Singleton · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great resource for any Christian, but especially mature believers who desire to deepen their appreciation for an understanding of biblical marriage.

This work is basically a theology of marriage, so it reads scholarly at times. The authors never slip to a wooden description of marriage but always do a good job of fostering excitement and pleasure toward the topic.

“Living in a Godly Marriage” is, more than anything, an attempt to present a cohesive account of what the puritans thought about marriage. It excels at this task, and the reader will be benefitted in so many ways from reading.

[Ming Chen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good. The authors discuss topics like the purposes of marriage, mutual duties in marriage, duties specific to husbands and wives in marriage, and so on. The book naturally abounds in Biblical and Puritan citations.

[James Mitchell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book, especially for those entering in marriage. Very good biblical truths for both husband and wives in any time in their marriage. The prayers in the appendix are very good.

[Mike · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is biblical through and through. Dr. Beeke draws upon the wisdom of the Puritans in expounding the duties of husbands and wives. It is free from the stain of egalitarianism. And even so, as a husband, the duties acribed to me, and the particulars so named, as I am to love my wife as Christ loves the church, are convicting to the uttermost. Beeke and La Belle don't shrink back from declaring the duties of a wife either, though this is not politically correct in this egalitarian age in which we live. The appendix containing George Swinnock's prayers for husbands and wives are worth the price of the book by itself. It starts off with a prayer of mutual duties in marriage, then is followed by a prayer for the wife’s duties in marriage, and completes with a prayer for the husband's duties in marriage.

At the end of each chapter are study questions to cause a couple to greatly consider what they just read in the previous chapter and how it applies to their own marriage.

This book is a breath of fresh air compared with another book on marriage that I will not name here, but is also marketed toward Reformed Christians. There is no effort spent in sugar coating God's commands for marriage directed to the husband, wife, or duties as a couple. I wholeheartedly recommend this book.

[Redeemed · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent and practical resource for understanding what God requires for a holy and productive marriage. Beeke et al begins with discussing how to begin marriage well - that is, - by understanding what marriage entails and how to choose well. Then they delve into the duties that marriage entail: those shared by both the husband and the wife, those specific to the wife, and those specific to the husband.

These discussions are supported by Biblical sources, particularly multiple Puritan sources.

I found it to be an illuminating and edifying read, and helped me understand what I do well and where I need to ask God for repentance and improvement as a husband. This is great also for simply understanding what it means to be a man or woman since marriage is a extension of those responsibilities in a specific context.

[Lawren Woudenberg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wisdom from the Puritans is timeless and relevant for everyday life.

"We set forth the above ideal for Christian marriage not because it is 'the puritan view', but because the Puritans convincingly showed the biblical view".

This book does a great job detailing the standard for both husband's and wive's in marriage, summarizing the old words of the Puritans in detail and demonstrating post-reformational marriage as the way God sees marriage. The standard is so high and this book spares no punch, but even higher than that is the forgiving love of our saviour Jesus Christ who looks after us in our failures.

[bookwisemom Laura Sherrill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Living in a Godly Marriage by Joel Beeke and James La Belle is such an encouraging and practical read for couples. The authors root everything in Scripture while still making it clear and easy to apply in daily life. I appreciated how they balance honest conversations about the challenges of marriage with a hopeful reminder of the beauty and joy that come when Christ is at the center.

This isn’t just a book for newlyweds—it’s helpful no matter what stage of marriage you’re in. It’s both convicting and uplifting, pointing you back to the gospel and giving real wisdom for building a stronger, Christ-honoring marriage. Highly recommend!

[Andrew Silva · Rating 5 out of 5]

I would state this is the best book I have read on the topic of marriage. It is obviously a modern book but it leans heavily on the works of several past Puritans so in that sense the reader gets the best of both worlds. Something helpful is the end of each chapter has study questions about what has just been read so this would make an excellent book for marriage preparation or pre-marital counseling. One portion I especially enjoyed was a section on modesty, including modesty in dress, a subject that is neglected today but needs to be reclaimed.

[Kevin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book on marriage which gives a view into the Puritan mind on the marriage covenant and the duties of husbands wives. It is very balanced for both husbands and wives. Also gives a great deal of practical marriage advice that is applicable today as it was then. Highly recommend for engaged and newlyweds. I’ve been married 8 years now and I got a treasure trove of wisdom from it as well.

[Cheyenne Langevelde · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent resource for married or even dating couples. It had a lot of wisdom and advice from the Puritans regarding marriage. My only possible complaint is that some of it felt repetitive at times, particularly the quotations from numerous Puritans on the same topics, but it was still worth reading.

[Faith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Set aside for the time being

[Joshua · Rating 5 out of 5]

Much I have learnt, yet much more that I need to practice. The last chapter sums it all up

[Billie Kupanoak · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent Read!!

Great, easy to read book! True teachings of a Christ centered marriage! Highly recommend, even if you’ve been married 20 years!

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Convicting and sanctifying! Anyone who wants to follow God should want to follow his commands in this area (and all areas). We need His strength in order to obey.

[Vanessa Vidal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Life changing!

[Joshua Satterfield · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books I have read about marriage so far.

[Lynn Ankunda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been especially blessed by the prayers at the end and how infused they are with scripture. It teaches me about how I can pray for both myself as a future wife and for my soon-to-be husband.

[Iain Hamill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent stuff. Lots to think about in terms of how society currently views marriage and family. Good application questions too.

[Harry Morasch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Inhaltlich sehr reich, sehr praxisnah und bibelfundiert

Ein Stern weniger wegen zu vieler Wiederholungen.

[Cristina]

am 1.12.22 d Iileitig gläse;
am 21.5.23 nomau aagfange