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272 pages, Paperback
First published May 7, 2015
I turned away again and closed my eyes. I wasn’t going to rise to it. I’ve done all the crying and despising myself that it’s possible for a person to do, followed by all the promising and list-making and will-powering, and all any of it does is make me want to eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and EAT.
…the best daydream I had was waiting to see Alice after she'd been rescued. I'm outside a big building - maybe a police station - with hundreds of press people pointing their cameras at the door and then suddenly all the cameras start clicking and flashing and I see Alice coming out wrapped in a police blanket, her hair caked in mud, her face all scratched and bleeding from her struggle with you, and tears running through it all as I rush over to her and she falls into my arms. I couldn't wait, couldn't wait for it all to be real, to actually happen. I thought, hurry up already, Mr. Caldwell, make my day!
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One thing I absolutely hate is when people start talking about food when they think I’m unhappy or being too quiet. As if talking about food will cheer me up, like I’m a simple idiot or something.