Unspeakable Love: Gay and Lesbian Life in the Middle East

by Brian Whitaker, Anna Wilson (Primary Contributor)

Homosexuality is a taboo subject in Arab countries. Clerics denounce it as a heinous sin, while newspapers write cryptically of "shameful acts." Although many parts of the world now accept sexual diversity, the Middle East is moving in the opposite direction. In this absorbing account, journalist Brian Whitaker calls attention to the voices of men and women who are struggling with gay identities in societies where they are marginalized and persecuted by the authorities. He paints a disturbing picture of people who live secretive, fearful lives and who are often jailed, beaten, and ostracized by their families, or sent to be "cured" by psychiatrists.

Whitaker's exploration of changing sexual behavior in the Arab world reveals that—while deeply repressive prejudices and stereotypes still govern much thinking about homosexuality—there are pockets of change and tolerance. The author combines personal accounts from individuals in the region with a look at recent Arab films and novels featuring gay characters and conducts a sensitive comparative reading of Christian, Jewish, and Islamic strictures around sexuality. Deeply informed and engagingly written, Unspeakable Love draws long overdue attention to a crucial subject.

Copub: Saqi Books

Brian Whitaker was Middle East editor at the Guardian for seven years and then an editor for the newspaper’s Comment is Free website. He is the author of What’s Really Wrong with the Middle East (Saqi Books, 2009). His website, www.al-bab.com, is devoted to Arab culture and politics. Unspeakable Love was shortlisted for the Lambda Literary Award in 2006.

Genres: Nonfiction, Queer, LGBT, Middle East, History, Religion, Sexuality

288 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2006

About the author

Brian Whitaker was a journalist for the The Guardian since 1987 and its Middle East editor from 2000-2007. He is currently an editor on the paper's "Comment is free". He also writes articles for Guardian Unlimited, the internet edition of the paper. He runs a personal, non-Guardian-related website, Al-Bab.com, about society and politics in the Arab world.

Reviews

[lady h · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm Egyptian, so whenever I begin any book on the topic of homosexuality in the Middle East, I approach it with some measure of caution. When that book is written by a an American white man, that caution increases tenfold. Brian Whitaker has been a journalist for The Guardian since 1987 and was its Middle East editor from 2000 to 2007. A robust background to be sure, but not necessarily one that would automatically negate orientalist views, and so I began reading with some trepidation. But I was pleasantly surprised!

Whitaker entire approach is based on nuance; he consistently and purposely shies away from making any sort of sweeping generalization about anything. He explores homosexuality in the Middle East as impartially as one could expect, balancing interviews with scholarly and popular publications to convey both a personal narrative and an overarching historical and societal one. Whitaker discusses various topics, from media coverage to Islamic legal analyses. While he never really delves fully into any one subject he succeeds in providing a broad overview, enough to give a decent primer on the issue.

Focusing mainly on Lebanon and Egypt, Whitaker threads between case studies, historical analyses, religious arguments, and personal interviews. He cites several landmark books, such as Scott Siraj al-Haqq Kugle's Homosexuality in Islam, which delves deeply into Islamic legal arguments against homosexuality and their validity - or lack thereof. Deftly summarizing Kugle's work, Whitaker elucidates the shaky foundation for religious laws against homosexuality. Whitaker also brings up Joseph Massad, author of The Gay International, best known for critiquing the universalizing of gay rights and their exportation to the non-Western world. Whitaker counters Massad's main argument while acknowledging that Massad's thesis is not without its merits.

One thing I would have liked to have seen more of is a discussion of lesbianism in the Middle East, but this is not necessarily a fault of the book. Whitaker acknowledges that gay women often tend to to fly below the radar. He terms this "lesbian invisibility" and goes on to say:

“Lesbian invisibility does have some advantages. In the big cities of Egypt, two women living together as ‘flatmates’ would not arouse much curiosity, Laila said - though that would depend to some extent on their choice of district. Neighbours would first of all want to establish whether they were prostitutes and would probably quiz the bawwab, the doorman who watches all comings and goings in Egyptian blocks of flats. If satisfied on that count, they might then imagine other explanations for the girls’ presence – quarrels with parents, etc.

‘They would think of anything else but lesbianism,’ Laila said. She recalled how much one lesbian couple had been adored by their landlady. ‘I wish all my tenants were like you,’ the landlady told them, suspecting nothing.”

Overall, this is a great introduction to a thorny topic. Whitaker delivers information objectively and manages to avoid wading into the waters of orientalist or condescending discourse (most of the time, anyway). The book, though, is a surface level examination of a dense, complex issue, and it left me wanting more.

[هالة · Rating 1 out of 5]

على قدر رغبتي في قرائة الكتاب لأعرف مالسر فيه و بالذات و انا اساعد هذا النوع من الناس بقدر المستطاع. اصابني بخيبة أمل شديدة. فكل ما في الموضوع قصص وقصص عن فتى في لينان او اخرى بسوريه ارجل في البادية. فقط قصص لا تغني ولاتسمن جوع يتحدث فيها انهم يعانون من الإضطهاد و انهم ليس لهم حقوق في بلادنا العربيه. الكتاب لم يقدم اي نظريات علمسة تحليلية على الأقل لو كان متحمس و غير مستهزء على الاقل تحليل للبيئة العربية المسلمة و خصائصها. انما السرد و الاستدلال عن ان البيئة متاخرة في تقبل هذه الظاهرة. فلم يقدم فيه اي كلام علمي ابدا الكتاب لا فائدة ترجى منه.

[Gerhard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Any (gay) expatriate working and living in Dubai will know there is a thriving, cosmopolitan and yet wholly discreet 'scene'. Travel outside the emirate, and it is quite amusing to see it has a reputation as the Sodom & Gomorrah of the Middle East.

Yet you only have to speak to local gays to get a glimpse into a very different world, where men who engage in same-sex activities do not necessarily perceive themselves as being 'gay', as this is seen as a foreign (that is, Western) concept denoting a particularly hedonistic and corrupt lifestyle practice.

Indeed, 'active' (penetrative) gay males are often seen to be even more masculine, as this is seen to require greater physicality and sexual appetite ... Then there is the concept of family honour, marriage and tradition thrown into the mix, and you have a very complicated social situation largely predicated on invisibility and denial.

Whitaker states early on that "sexual rights are not only a basic element of human rights, but should have an integral part in moves towards Arab reform." This is particularly difficult, of course, in a country like Saudi Arabia, where homosexuality is punishable by death, and where bribery and secrecy rule the day.

Added to this is the peculiar schizophrenia inherent in some Arab cultures, such as denouncing American imperialism on the one hand and then championing American brands, fast food and consumer goods on the other.

This book is a fascinating introduction into the Arab mentality towards gender and sexuality in general. It is far more than being about homosexuality per se, as it touches on so many other aspects of social life: the family, law, language, religion, education.

In addition, Whitaker provides cogent analyses of key Christian and Islamic texts often used to denounce homosexuality, and the implications for gays in the Arab world. In his suggestions for reform, he argues that Arab gays will inevitably have to band together for their rights and dignity, as the current policy of invisibility will only go so far.

There is a fascinating side-discussion on controversial issues such as Israel championing gay rights as a means of legitimising the current regime, while cracking down hard on the Palestinians on the other. Another fascinating debate is to what extent a government can legislate what happens in a country's bedrooms, between consenting adults (Egypt was notorious for this apparently).

Equally fascinating is how the technology of social media have liberated the Arab youth, both gay and straight, or just generally disaffected, right under the noses of oppressive governments. (Then again, to be seen to conform is often more important than the act of conformance itself).

Commenting on the blanket religious conformity exacted by the authorities and religious police in Saudi Arabia, for example, Whitaker says: "All this is done in pursuit of a cultural authenticity that is not only unattainable in practice but often no more authentic than the England of thatched cottages, cream teas and croquet on the lawn."

One thing that struck me while reading this is how diverse the Arab world is ethnically. Whitaker makes a partial listing: Alawites, Armenians, Assyrians, Baha'is, Berbers, Chaldeans, Copts, Druzes, Ibadis, Ismailis, Jews, Kurds, Maronites, Sahrawis, Tuareq, Turkmen (from Turkmenistan), Yezidis and Zaidis.

He adds: "... Yet serious discussion of ethnic/religious diversity and its place in society is almost as big a taboo as discussion of sexual diversity. If the existence of non-Arab or non-Muslim groups is acknowledged at all, it is usually only to declare how harmoniously everyone gets along."

Clearly this is not the case, and clearly sexual diversity is only the tip of a veritable iceberg of social issues that the Arab world is grappling with.

Fascinating, and essential reading for anyone interested in this part of the world beyond the often sensationalist headlines often reported in the Western press.

[هالة · Rating 1 out of 5]

الكتاب لايحمل عنوانه انه فقط يروي قصص واقعية و بطريقة لا تشد القارئ و طبعا المؤلف مع المثلية الجنسية.
و هكذا القصص التي يكتبها كلها تعاطف غير مبني على أسس علمية.

[MuHammad Ahmed El-WaKeel · Rating 4 out of 5]

الكتاب عبارة عن تقرير صحفي طويل ومتوسع جدا عن حياة المثليين والمثليات في الشرق الأوسط، ما قبل عامي (2005-2006) مع التركيز على أربع دول مهمة: لبنان، مصر، السعودية، وإيران لخصوصية كل دولة وتنوع طبيعة التعامل فيها مع الموضوع؛ سواء من ناحية التضييق القانوني أو الشعبي.

الكتاب سبع فصول، لكل فصل موضوع مختلف بيتناول الجوانب بتاعت الموضوع. الفصول الخمسة الأولى كانت ممتازة حقيقي، شغل حلو واجتهاد فظيع من الراجل في الشغل على الملف والمقابلات ومراجعة القضايا والحالات اللي ارتبط فيها موضوع المثلية بأي حدث معروف. زي حادثة (كوين بوت ) مثلا في بداية الألفينات في مصر. الفصلين الأخيرين فيهم مشاكل كبيرة؛ لأنهم مرتبطين بالبحث في طبيعة الموضوع في الأديان وتتبع قة قوم لوط وتناولها في المسيحية والإسلام بعدها، كانت منطقة بعيدة عن تخصصه وكانوا فصلين ضعاف فعلا. لكن الشغل اللي في الأول ممتاز بصراحة.

مهم لما تدخل الكتاب تكون فاهم طبيعة إنه صحفي بيكتب مش عالم دين ولا راجل سياسي ولا حقوق؛ عشان تتحرر من قيود التفكير في التعامل مع الموضوع وتقرأ بارتياح، ومتنساش إن ده الوضع قبل (2006 ) وإنه حاجات كتير اتغيرت والوضع بقى أفضل نسبيا على مستوى الحريات كلها وتناولها المجتمعي بشكل عام.

هختم بإني بحب جدا كتب التحقيقات الصحفية المطولة، خاصة اللي بتعتمد على شغل الأرشيف والتقليب في القديم دي، مخيبتش معايا ولا مرة تقريبا، افتكر منهم دلوقتي كتاب (ظاهرة العادة الجدد ) لوائل لطفي.

وأخيرا، الكتاب متاح على النت وعلى تليجرام، وترجتمه ممتازة بصراحة وسلسلة لدرجة إني في مرة رجعت اتأكد من اسم الصحفي مخصوص عشان كنت شاكك إنه عربي وكتبه بالعربي.. طبعا مع التنويه على إن الكاتب اخفى الاسم الأول منه وبدل منه حط حرف (ف.) وأظن السبب مفهوم وحذره مفهوم.
---
الحب الممنوع، براين ويتاكر.
مارس، 2020.
(3.5/5).

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall, I really enjoyed this book. It is a well thought out, well researched book which presents its arguments in a logical fashion. However, I was left feeling that the argument was flawed in some way. The main argument of the book was that we shouldn't try to change the religion, for that will just cause a push back in the name of protectionism. Thus, we must seek to change the culture (through secularization within the government).

This is a fairly decent idea, except the author supports this position by using the examples of the United States and Israel. The flaw in this is that both these countries were founded with secularism in place from the beginning. They weren't trying to root religion out of a government when religion has BEEN the government for the past however many centuries. Thus, this approach would be doomed from the beginning.

Then the second part is that this secularization would lead to more questioning and interpretation of the Qur'an, which is basically fighting to change the religion. It's not that I don't agree that there needs to be reinterpretation of some of the passages, but I think this will lead right back to the fundamentalist push back.

[Dania Abutaha · Rating 5 out of 5]

بعد كتاب اشتهاء العرب لجوزيف مسعد لابد من فتح نافذه على الشرق الاوسط الان...حقائق مروعه و مذهله...عن الاخر ...لفظ المجتمع الحدي...فرض مجموعه قيم على اشخاص يملكون غيرها...جرائم الحد هي الوارده في القران من غير الجائز اضافه اليها اخرى بالقياس...احيانا يكون التخمين صائبا لكن لا يسعنا التاكد...الله وحده يدرك حقا منافع او اذى اي فعل في هذه الحياه او الحياه التاليه...و يترائى لنا ان فعلنا لا يتسبب بالاذى لكنه قد يكون في الواقع اكثر اذيه مما نتصور...في حال راى بعض المسلمين انه من الضروري انكار كون التنوع الجنسي جزءا من العالم الطبيعي المخلوق فسيتعين عليهم ايجاد برهان يبرر انكارهم للخطاب القراني...التنبه للحقوق الفرديه مهم...التنوع مصد ر غنى....وجدته يكمل كتاب جوزف مسعد و مباشر جدا في طرح افكاره التي ستعبد الطريق لبعد انساني في داخلك...يستحق القراءه و النظر للحياه من خلال منشور جديد بالوان قوس قزح ....هل يفزعك او يستفزك ان تعلم ان الجمعيه الامريكيه للطب النفسي و الجمعيه الامريكيه لعلماء النفس حذفوا مفرده المثليه من لوائحها للامراض العقليه المعترف بها و يعتبروا ان الجهود لمعالجتها تؤدي للارجح الى ضرر اكبر من منفعتها...و بان ليس للمرء الخيار بان يكون مثلي او سوي! ان المثليه ليست مرض و لا تتطلب علاج و لا يمكن تغييرها...و لنبتعد عن السياسات التامريه المحاكه من الاخر اي كان و لنتحمل مسؤوليه تقبل الاخر في مجتمع حدي مهزوم بجمود فكري

[Badria Al Humaidhi · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very well written and researched book on homosexuality in the middle eat. I loved how it covered all aspects of the issue, social, religious, cultural, legal etc. definitely a recommended read.

[Naeema Alaradi · Rating 5 out of 5]

يتحدث هذا الكتاب أو البحث عن وضع المثليين و المثليات في الشرق الأوسط حيث يوضح أن نظرة المتابعة الإعلامية في شأن المثلية العربية تشجع على اعتبارها تقريبا ظاهرة أجنبية محض و لكن ظهرت بعض المنظمات الخاصة بالمثليين و المثليات مثل منظمة حلم و الفاتحة. تحدث الكتاب عن المثلية في الأدب العربي و السينما كما ناقش القوانين المتعلقة بمعاقبة المثليين. لم يحتو الاعلان العالمي لحقوق الإنسان على مناهضة التمييز على أساس التوجه الجنسي بشكل خاص و لكن في عام ٢٠٠٣ أبدت البرازيل قلقها العميق من انتهاكات حقوق الإنسان في العالم تشمل أشخاصا من منطلق توجههم الجنسي و قد اعترضت خمس بلدان إسلامية على القرار و هي السعودية و مصر و ليبيا و ماليزيا و باكستان بينما قال الممثل الكندي أنه لا شأن للدولة في غرفة نوم الأمة.
يشكل الاعدام عقوبة ممارسي السودومية في أفغانستان و ايران و السعودية.
في عام ١٩٥٧ أوصت لجنة تحقيق في قانون المثلية في بريطانيا بتشريع العلاقات المثلية التي تجري ضمن النطاق الخاص بين راشدين يبلغان ٢١ سنة على الأقل و برضاهما.يناقش قصة قوم لوط عليه السلام و ضيفيه الملاكين برؤية مغايرة لا تشير بالضرورة إلى غضب الله و عقابه بسبب المثلية تحديدا بل بسبب كون قوم لوط قطاع طرق أو عدم احترامهم للضيوف بشكل عام.
يمثل الكتاب دراسة مهمة في موضوعه .. ربما لا يضيف للناس ذات التوجه الجنسي المغاير و لكنه قد يفيد المثليين و المثليات الذين لا يعرفون موقعهم في الشرق الأوسط.

[Nick Parkinson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Whitaker's 'Unspeakable Love' paints a picture of queer life in the Middle East with broad brushstrokes. So broad, in fact, that it counts Morocco, Tunisia, Algeria, Sudan, Mauritania and Egypt as being part of the Middle East. Because of its breadth, the work sometimes seems to lack direction. This is clear when Whitaker turns back on his tail, repeating information needlessly. In the final chapter, he again returns to Arabic's lack of a synonym for "gay": a topic treated at least twice in earlier chapters. Similarly, each chapter lacks a focus.

His data is taken mainly from interviews, newspapers and websites. These are reported in a "he said, she said, they said" fashion so that it can be hard to keep sense of who exactly is taking because there is no characterisation. Of course, I wouldn't expect this in an academic monograph but Whitaker never really writes academically either. Neither journalistic nor academic, the result feels sometimes like reading an opinion piece, which is not in and of itself a bad thing.

I can't help but wonder why Whitaker never states his own sexuality or identity. I assume he is white, but readers are left to guess this. I feel like a discussion of his implications as a foreign researcher would have helped to ground the text. Admittedly, he does say that the topic is little researched and he decided to look at queer life in the Middle East because many Arabs fear the reprisals if they publish on this issue.

Still, some of the points raised were thoughtfully and concisely discussed. The first point that really interested me was Whitaker's discussion of the decline of homoeroticism in Arabic literature. "Classical literature reflects a period of self confidence and Arab-Islamic Empire," he writes. Now though, "his virility cannot be exerted as it was in the age of certainties". This, of course, doesn't encapsulate the invisibility of other non-heteronormative sexualities and gender identities in Arab literature.

When he does discuss lesbianism, he also rebuts a fantastic point about same-sex attraction among women. He cites Iman al-Ghafari who warns that "the feminist discourse that turns lesbianism into a political choice is not liberating. Instead, it puts lesbians into a troublesome position where they have to play a major role in fulfilling the desires and fantasies of some heterosexual feminists at the expense of true lesbian desires." This reminds me of how (often cis, straight) men dismiss lesbians and harrass them to confess that they are bi (when they are not).

Finally, Whitaker deftly rebukes Masaad and his clash of civilizations approach. For the author, advocating for gay rights is not cultural imperialism - homosexuality has always existed in the Arab world and pretending otherwise for "cultural authenticity" leaves no room for modern Arab self-expression.

All in all, a good introductory read on the topic that sometimes lacks because of it's excessive scope and undecided voice.

[Brianna · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's hard to say "really liked it" when it's a book about oppression, but I definitely learned a lot about how homosexuality was treated in the past (for instance, it "abounds" in classic Arabic literature, but started to disappear from books when literacy became more widespread, and the audience was wider), and how it's treated in the present (each country's penalties for sodomy, for instance, and how they tend to prosecute just enough to make an example of an unlucky few, but not enough to make people think homosexuality might be too common).

On lesbians:
In the Arab world ... the lesbian identity doesn't seem to exist, not because there are no lesbians, but because practices which might be termed lesbian in Western culture are left nameless in the Arab culture. Taking into consideration that the word 'lesbian' [suhaaquiyya] is rarely used in Arabic and, once used, it is charged with negative connotations, most lesbians avoid any public assertion of their identities. Besides, it is quite easy for Arab lesbians to deprive their emotional and physical intimacies of their lesbian connotations because it is common in a conservative Arab culture that advocates separation between the sexes to find intimate relations among members of the same sex, without having to call such relations homosexual.

On the dangers of black and whiting the issue:
To say that Islam prescribes 'death for homosexuals' is simplistic and misleading, even though religious conservatives and Western gay rights campaigners (each for their own reasons) like to claim that it does ... This sort of propagandising is particularly unhelpful to those gay and lesbian Muslims who are struggling to reconcile their sexuality with their religion.

On the Qur'an:
Despite the intolerance often found in Muslim societies today, [Scott Siraj al-Haqq] Kugle observes that the Qur'an 'positively assesses natural diversity in creation and in human societies'. In contrast to the biblical story of Babel, where God scatters the people and makes them speak mutually incomprehensible languages as a punishment, the Qur'an welcomes their differences:
We created you different tribes and nations so that you may come to know one another and acknowledge that the most honourable among you are those that stay the most conscious of Allah.
From among Allah's signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth and the difference of your tongues and the variation of your colours.
With the Qur'an's vivid portrayal of diversity at so many levels of the natural and human world, it would be logical to assume that this diversity of creation plays out on the level of sexuality as well.

[Yarub Khayat · Rating 5 out of 5]

@تم نشر هذا الكتاب باللغة الإنجليزية عام 2006، وذلك بناء على لقاءات وجها لوجه قام بها المؤلف في كلا من القاهرة وبيروت، فضلا مصادر أخرى كثيرة ومتنوعة(موضحة تفصيلا في الكتاب)؛
@قامت دار الساقي في عام2007 بنشر ترجمته باللغة العربية، في كتاب يقع ضمن 296 صفحة، جيد الإخراج، نادر الأخطاء المطبعية.. وذلك مع فهارس توضيحية وبيبلوغرافيا تبين تفاصيل وافية عن كافة مراجع الكتاب، وفهارس للأعلام والأماكن؛
@عمل المؤلف لسبعة أعوام كمراسل لصحيفة "ذا جارديان"، في الشرق الأوسط ثم لحسابها في التعليق على بعض مواقع الإنترنت؛
@للمؤلف موقع على الشبكة مخصص للثقافة والسياسة العربية، كما أن له مؤلفات وأبحاث أخرى متعلقة بالشرق الأوسط؛
@يوضح المؤلف في مقدمة كتابه بأن "غياب النقاش عن الموضوع سبب وجيه جدا للكتابة عنه"؛
@يطالب المؤلف في الفصل الأخير من الكتاب ب: "مواجهة الاختلافات بصدق وشجاعة وانفتاح وعلنية قبل أن تتسبب بأزمة"؛
@في رأيي أن التحدي الحقيقي في هذا الكتاب يقع ضمن الفصل السادس منه(وهو الفصل ماقبل الأخير)، وعنوانه: "جنس وحساسية" الذي أشار فيه إلى اتفاق الأديان السماوية الثلاثة، حتى منتصف خمسينات القرن العشرين، على اعتبار "المثلية" أمرا سيئا.. ثم استعراضه لماذا أصبحت المسيحية واليهودية أكثر تسامحا مع الأمر، ولماذا يرى المؤلف أن على الدول الإسلامية أن تحذو حذوهم !؛
@ينتهي الكتاب بعنوان مثير للفصل السابع منه، وهو "سبل الإصلاح"، أي السبل التى يقترح المؤلف على الدول والمجتمعات المسلمة اتباعها، لتصبح أكثر تسامحا مع الموضوع، مع بيان فوائد ذلك، (في رأيي الشخصي أن هذا هو أضعف فصول الكتاب خاصة وأن ما يمكن تطبيقه في المجتمعات الغربية لن يكون بالضرورة ممكنا ولا مقبولا في غيرها من المجتمعات)؛
@من أهم ما جاء في الفصل السابع المذكور أعلاه، إفادة المؤلف التي جاءت بالصفحة278من ترجمة الكتاب، ونصها حسبما يلي:
"فخلال القرن الماضي، ابتكرت القوى الإمبريالية شكل معظم البلدان العربية كما نعرفه راهنا، ورسمت حدودها، أحيانا على نحو اعتباطي. لقد كان على الحكومات العربية المتلاحقة التكيف مع المشكلات المتأتية من ذلك".

تعليقي الإجمالي على الكتاب أنه بحث عملي عميق ورصين وجرئ ويستحق القراءة خاصة ممن يتمتعون بموهبة القراءة النقدية، وليست قراءة تقبل فقط.. وأثق بأن ممثلي دولنا في الهيئات والمنظمات الدولية لديهم اطلاع على أمثال مادة هذا الكتاب، بل وأكثر.

[Abdulkhalek Zohbi · Rating 3 out of 5]

هذا الكتاب أصدر عام ٢٠٠٦/٢٠٠٧ تكلم عن الصراع الجنسي في الدول العربية بطريقة موضوعية جدا.

المواضيع السبعة كانت جيدة، وأحببت تطرق الكتاب لعدة عوامل، الدينية والسياسية والإجتماعية وغيرها.

اتمنى لو قرأته منذ فترة اصداره لكان تقييمي له سيختلف نظرا لفرق ١٥ عام، لكن سيظل الصراع قائما لهذا الموضوع حتى يومنا هذا.

[Drianne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Kind of depressing, really, unsurprising given the book's subject. It wasn't as informative as I'd hoped, but I was most interested in the bits about growing acceptance in places like Beirut.

[Sam Berner · Rating 5 out of 5]

I needed something on how alternative sexualities were portrayed in Arab media - this is good. Avoids the type of cheap orientalism I have seen in other publications on the subject.

[Thuraya Al-otaibi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hands down, thee most comprehensive considerate book I've ever read. Whitaker covers every single aspect of the issue.

[Sarah Kaddoura · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book is designed for a western audience mainly. Also, it's a white man that tried to equate left-handedness to homosexuality in Islam..

[Eslam الغني · Rating 3 out of 5]

A Panoramic view of a thorny subject:

"Stephen Whitaker," The Guardian newspaper correspondent in the Middle East, between 2007 and 2000, provides an approach to the issue of sexuality "identity and sexual orientation" in the Middle East, which he of course lived through some of its chapters by virtue of his work and residence, and he sought to learn about the other chapters and aspects of them through conducting personal interviews with homosexuals and lesbians in person or at a distance, as well as looking at content related to the issue via the Internet or through reports and writings that dealt with the matter and presented it for support or condemnation.

Whitaker made a remarkable effort in trying to present the various dimensions of the issue, which are complex in nature and the nature of the societies to which they relate. His approach to the informational part was perhaps more accurate and thoughtful than it is in the analytical side, which will undoubtedly be controversial, especially regarding religious texts, their interpretations and varying adaptations to different realities temporally and spatially.

The book revealed - by monitoring the reality of homosexuality and homosexuals in different Arab countries, specifically Egypt, Lebanon, Saudi Arabia, as well as Middle Eastern, if we added Iran and the Zionist entity - a package of laws through which governments try to put a framework and establish a position to deal with gay men and women, as well as the positions of families and acquaintances of those who declared their homosexuality or revealed the truth of their own gender in one way or another ,and as it seemed, that religious concepts are mixed with social and even economic considerations, making it difficult for the observer to take a specific firm position if he was not directly concerned with the matter..

Every writer must have his own bias and Whitaker’s bias here, based on the principle that personal freedoms are close to the entity of every human being, which no one should narrow or derogate from, whether it is an institution or an individual, and personal ethics should not be imposed or controlled through an institution or an individual other than the relevant person as long as he does not harm others, and Whitaker presents in his analysis other views that support this approach.

He also transmits views that oppose his opinion of course and its fundamentals are religious, social and moral in the first place and see in homosexuality a deviation from the nature of creation, a challenge to the will of the Creator and then the established traditions of eastern societies ,the concept of natural sexual desire For hetero and community structure and family entity based on only normal relationship between individuals of two different sexual types..

In the end, I admired the book - despite the necessary amount of difference, of course - and the information it provided and the presentation of many points of view and details that I was not sufficiently aware of - it must be noted here that the book was issued in 2006 and there have been a lot of developments since then - and it is one of the few books that approached the topic of homosexuality, which we still either do not recognize its existence from the ground up on the official level and we do not deal with it except as a symbol or according to broad categories that are not related to dealing with the matter directly.

Or we recognize its presence on a social level, but the phantom freedoms which are often not available in our Arab countries don’t allow the issue to be dealt with in a scientific and academic manner that allows ,in turn, presenting the issue in a realistic manner, and in its various spectrums, at which time it is left for every researcher or reader to determine his position or bias towards it, which didn’t happen until now and unfortunately I do not see it happening in the next few years.

My affection

[Vanessa (V.C.) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book on a whim and I am more than glad that I did. Approaching a book like this as a non-Muslim and as someone who is not Middle Eastern comes with some level of respect and caution: this book was NOT written by a Muslim or Middle Eastern journalist/writer, so therefore, I can't speak personally on whether or not the way this was written by an American white man was "well done" or "accurate." I can gather one thing though that shines loud and clear: it was broad, very general and nuanced with no bias in sight, and backed up with mostly anecdotes from queer Muslims (mostly gay men) and scholarly text on the history of how queer Middle Eastern people have been represented in film, media, and literature. Even though the lesbian representation was minor since Middle Eastern lesbians are largely under-the-radar, I was still impressed at how much he could still delve into their oppression and mistreatment, the anecdotes, as equally eye-opening as it was heartbreaking. This anecdotal she-said/he-said approach might come across as scattered and confusing, but I was pleasantly surprised at how this was executed: it was immediately accessible, easy to read and follow, and very self-aware of its own privilege. While I wished that this was written by a Muslim or Middle Eastern journalist, and especially by one who is queer, one can understand why that couldn't be, and at least it was written by a white author who has experience writing on the Middle East, so at least that offers some credibility. That is mostly the reason why I'm not sure if this would be the go-to book on reading about queer Muslims, as also, I get the impression that this book was written not just by but for non-Muslims, so therefore, this book is mostly all surface-level and won't delve too deep, and that's okay; if anything, Unspeakable Love is a fine primer and a pretty fast read, a deeply moving, educational, and important one.

[Mohamed Hubail · Rating 2 out of 5]

يسلط هذا الكتاب الضوء على حياة المثليين في الشرق الأوسط، والمشاكل التي تواجههم من ناحية التضارب مع القيم المجتمعية والدينية. إلا أن تاريخ المثلية أو الشذوذ في تاريخ شعوب الشرق الأوسط متجذر بشكل عريق، وخصوصًا بفترة الحضارة الإسلامية، حيث كانوا الاوروبين يجرمونها عندما كان المسلمين يحبذونها، .

يحاول كاتب الكتاب أن ينفي وجود حكم بالقتل على المثليين في اليهودية والمسيحية، ولكنه لا يوفق رجوعًا إلى العهد القديم والجديد، فهو يتاجهل النصوص بشكل كبير جدًا، وعندما نأتي إلى الإسلام من ناحية تجريم المثلية، ففي الأحاديث يوفق كونها ضعيفة السند، ولكن في القرآن لا يوفق بسبب وجود الدليل، كما أنه قام بتفسير القرآن على هواه، وكان ورود قصة قوم لوط لا تعني شيئًا حسب ما يذكره المؤلف بالنص!!!

يحاول التبرير للمثلية من ناحية السياق الديني ولكن لا يوفق. إلا أنه كتاب مهم حيث يعرض المخاطر التي يتعرض لها المثليين في الشرق الأوسط والتناقض المجتمعي حول هذا الموضوع، حيث يعيش المثليين حياة متناقضة وكذلك يمارس المجتمع هذا التناقض، فنسبة الشذوذ في الشرق الأوسط عالية جدًا وخصوصا في السعودية، ولكن التستر المجتمعي يصور لنا بأنها ليست بموجودة، ومن الممكن معرفة وجودها من خلال بعض التلميحات غير الواضحة على مختلف المنصات أو العبارات من التراث الشعبي وغير ذلك..

يسلط أيضا تواطؤ السلطات السياسية معهم واستخدامهم كملف عند الضرورة لكسب الرأي العام.

[Jacob Heartstone · Rating 3 out of 5]

An educating, non-fiction summary on the status of LGBT life in the Middle East.

I liked the author´s broad approach to the topic and how he tried to discuss homosexuality and laws pertaining to it seperately in the various Arabic countries of the Middle East, summarizing when possible, but also emphasizing differences, thus painting as broad a picture as possible on less than 250 pages.
I also liked that different chapters focused on different angles of homosexual/lesbian life, approaching the topic from legal, literary, but also from personal perspectives.

I am, however, sceptical about the extent to which a British journalist (regardless of the fact that the Middle East seems to be his expert area and he has years of experience working there), can (or for that matter should) represent gays and lesbians in Middle Eastern countries. I see a continuation of cultural hegemony here, even though I readily admit that this book is very valuable and serves the purpose of giving visibility to a topic that would otherwise (had a Middle Easterner written it) not have achieved the same prominence, I am sure.

[سيّاف · Rating 3 out of 5]

يناقش الكتاب المثلية الجنسية بالشرق الاوسط ، في البداية يعرض الكاتب قصص عدة اشخاص قام بمقابلتهم عرب تكلموا عن حياتهم بالدول العربية والاضطهاد الي يتعرضون له.
ايضا عرض القوانين التي تتخذها الدول العربية لتجريم المثلية وسجن المثليين رغم انه في بعض الدول لا توجد قوانين واضحة للتجريم لكنها تذهب تحت غطاء قوانين الدعارة، يعرض ايضا وجهة نظر الدين بخصوص الموضوع من عدة "علماء" دين .
كتاب جيد وآراء الكاتب كانت شبه غائبة في الكتاب مما انقذه من الغرق في بحر التنضير .

نقطة ارغب بالاشارة اليها، قام الكاتب بمقارنة بين الاديان وتقبلها للمثلية وشرح ان المسيحية واليهودية ديانات تقبلت المثلية بشكل اكبر نسبيًا من الاسلام فيذهب بشرحه الى تحليل الطريقة والنصوص التي ظهرت بها موضوع المثلية بالكتب المقدسة للديانات هذه فيحلل النصوص اليهودية والمسيحية ويستنتج انها كانت نصوص "اكثر خفة" بطرحها للموضوع. حسنا ربما يكون هذا صحيح (رغم انه بطريقة عرض الموضوع بهذه الكتب كان مشابه جدا للطريقة التي تم بها عرضها بالقران)
لكن يوجد نقطة لم يشير اليها حتى وهي انه بالوقت الحالي معتنقين الديانات اليهودية والمسيحية اغلبهم يعيشون في دول ليبرالية مثل امريكا ودول اوروبا مما يسمح للافكار اليبرالية بالتسرب والظغط على الافكار الدينية لتصبح اكثر ليونة بشأن حقوق الافراد على عكس المسلمين الذين اغلبهم يعيشون في دول غير ليبرالية مما يعني عدم حدوث التداخل هذا .
***هذا تحليلي المتواضع لهذه النقطة، طبعا غير مبني على دراسات او دعائم . قدعنة من عندي يعني

[Cha.Me · Rating 3 out of 5]

لم يعد يبهرني العرب بتخلفهم وانحطاطهم .. كل شي منهم متوقع كل العالم من حولنا يتطور ويتقدم ونحن نقبع في الخلف . هل من الصعب عليهم احترام الأقليات ؟ هل صعب عليهم تقبل الميول الجنسية المختلفه بعدما اثبت العلم انها ليست خيارا ولا مرض ؟حالات القتل والإنتحار والتعذيب وكل هؤلاء الناس الغارقين في المعاناة والألم والخوف من التصريح بمعتقداتهم او ميولهم أي ذنب اقترفوه ليعاقبون بولادتهم كعرب ؟؟!! يا للمأساه ، ليس لدي اي امل في ان نتخطى عصور الظلام كما حدث بأوربا ولكن لدي اصرار وتمرد لأواجه كل تخلف حولي في محيطي وأصرح بأفكاري علانية وسحقا للأنذال ديناصورات الأرض .. المعادين للحقوق.. سأدافع عن حقوق مجتمع اللاجنسية والميم والمرأة وحرية المعتقد ولا يهمني لو مت في سبيل هذا .

[Najla Isameel · Rating 1 out of 5]

الكتاب لا يرقى للمستوى المطلوب، ويخالف طبيعة المجتمعات العربية والإسلامية وحتى يخالف للأديان السماوية.

استعرض الكاتب عدة حالات وطرح عدة مسائل تخص الجانب الديني في الوطن العربي والاحكام والقوانين الخاصة ببعض البلدان في عقاب المثليين وعدم تقبلهم. سرد بعض القصص على لسان أصحابها ممن انتهجوا المثلية كحياة وبين صعوبة تقبل المجتمع لهم.

وركز على الذكور أكثر من الإناث في هذا الجانب.

محاولة جعل الموضوع عادي وطبيعي وينشد لحقوقهم في الجنسانية.

مزعج إلى حد ما.

تقيمه نجمة واحدة لتسليطه الضوء على بعض الظواهر والبرامج التلفزيونية التي كان الاغلب يتابعها او يعتقد بأنها برامج عادية وليست تشجيع للمثلية، المعلومات حول العقوبات، رأي الدين الإسلامي وبعض الأديان السماوية في المثلية.

[zeynep]

Well that was depressing. Two things that stood out - 1)colonising Europeans remarking on how horny and bisexual Muslim societies are back in the 18th century or whatever, only for today's Muslim societies to view homosexuality as a western product
2)ayatollah khomeini saying trans issues are separate from gay issues and Iran actually having high rates of sex change operations...meanwhile homosexuality is punishable by death. Ok his double edged impact I love/hate to see it

[ForenSeek · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good overview of a complex taboo topic. I studied this topic a bit back in college, so there was nothing particularly new here for me. Heartbreaking personal stories mixed with more general sociological contextualization - a formula that works nine times out of ten. Recommended for the general reader with a passing interest in the topic.

[محمود راضي · Rating 2 out of 5]

ينتمي لنوعية كتب أسميها (كتب القص واللصق)، حيث يبدأ اﻷمر باختيار موضوع عام، يستتبعه رص آلي دون تمييز لكل معلومة وأي معلومة تندرج بشكل ما أو آخر تحت هذا الموضوع العام، شيء أشبه بنوعية الكتب التي يقدمها ياسر ثابت مثل (شهقة اليائسين).

[Nelly Fisher · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting insight into various aspects of homosexual life in Arabic countries, Israel and Iran. Included also movies and books which have had characters, history, political aspects, NGOs etc. Not the most interesting writing style, however.

[Zaina · Rating 3 out of 5]

كتاب يستحق القراءه لانه يخترق تابو مجتمعي في الشرق الأوسط وهو المثليه .. جريء

[JALEN · Rating 1 out of 5]

It is gay and lesbian. homosexuality is not a topic to speak on its is disgusting and very rude to mankind and it goes against the bible and is disrespecting GOD our lord and savior