What the Light Hides

by Mette Jakobsen

Vera and David have been passionately in love since the day they met more than twenty years ago. They live in the Blue Mountains where Vera is a sculptor and David makes furniture. Their son, Ben, is at university in Sydney.

Or at least he was. What the Light Hides begins five months after Ben’s death, an apparent suicide. Vera is trying to pick up the pieces, but David cannot let go, cannot believe that Ben is dead. He goes to Sydney, ostensibly to work, but cannot get Ben out of his mind. He keeps seeing him in the street, visits the room where he was living, goes in pursuit of Ben’s friends. His refusal to come to terms with the death of his son is destroying his relationship with Vera, but he cannot help himself, in spite of all the evidence. David is risking everything.

Mette Jakobsen’s gifts of delicate and empathetic observation are on display in this tender and moving novel, a much-anticipated follow-up to her debut, The Vanishing Act.

Genres: Fiction

201 pages, Paperback

Published March 29, 2016

About the author

Originally from Denmark, Mette Jakobsen now resides in Sydney. She is an adventurer, author and playwright.
Mette has a PhD in Creative Writing and has graduated from NIDA’s Playwright
Studio. Her novels have been shortlisted for the Commonwealth Book Prize, topped
the Indie Book List, and mentioned on Oprah’s Booklist.
Mette has taught creative writing at universities and several of her plays have been
broadcast on ABC Radio National.
The Tower Series is her first YA title.

Reviews

[Jodi · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very melancholic tale of David and Vera—a married couple still very deeply in love, living in the mountains north of Sydney. Their 23-year-old son, Ben—away at University—has been incommunicado for days, and after searching his apartment, they decide to report him missing. Just hours later, a body is found washed up on the beach; dental x-rays and DNA confirm it's Ben. It seems he'd jumped to his death from a cliff. David, though, cannot accept that he's gone. In fact, he believes he's still alive, claiming he's seen him in Newtown—a suburb of Sydney—on several occasions, though always slipping from sight. This inability to accept Ben's death and his insistence on searching for him creates a rift in the marriage. Vera is terribly upset that he continues looking for him and speaking of him in the present tense. Then, one day, while wandering through Newtown, David spots him again and this time he runs, laser-focused. He catches up, spins him around til they're face-to-face! But it's not Ben he's been seeing—just a young man who looks and walks remarkably like him. This encounter triggers something in David and he shamefully realizes how foolish he's been. He can finally accept that Ben is gone forever, and Vera lovingly asks him to come back home.

Of course, there's more to it than this sparse overview. What the Light Hides is a beautiful, bittersweet story of tremendous love and loss. At just ~150 pages, it's powerful, moving, and a book I highly recommend.

Four father-son👨‍👦 love stars. 💜💜💜💜

[Marianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

What The Light Hides is the second novel by Danish-born Australian author, Mette Jakobsen. Despite proof to the contrary, David Oliver is unable to accept that his twenty-three year old son Ben is dead. Even though the closeness he once had with his son had ended years before, and their last contact was less than friendly, David cannot believe that his son would choose this path without seeking out his loving parents.

Unable to let go, he cannot help but speak of Ben in the present tense, obsessively recording his fleeting sightings of Ben in the street. David’s denial and fixation distresses his wife, Vera, gnawing at their deep and long-standing love.

He leaves their Blue Mountains home, ostensibly to continue his woodcraft, and perhaps also to relieve the tension on their marriage. But he soon finds himself at Ben’s flat, seeking out Ben’s friends and acquaintances, convinced he can solve the mystery that haunts him.

Jakobsen skilfully paints the picture of grief, illustrates the importance of empathetic support and shows just how destructive denial can be. Her characters are real and flawed, and it is impossible not to feel their suffering. She evokes her setting, both the mountains and the inner city, with consummate ease. Many readers will find they are moved to tears by this stirring read.
4.5★s

[Harj D · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having read and loved 'The Vanishing Act' by Mette Jakobsen, I was really looking forward to reading 'What the Light Hides'. Although the story is different to that of 'The Vanishing Act', it is undeniable just how the empathetic style of writing Mette has adopted really manages to move the reader and strikes a chord with them so fervently.

'What the Light Hides' follows the emotional journey that David goes through when he learns that his son Ben committed suicide. It delves into his incredibly loving relationship with his wife Vera and the discord he has with his mother and brother, focusing on how he maintains all his relationships whilst going through such a troubling time.

The opening of the book I must admit did not quite hold my attention the same way that 'The Vanishing Act' had, but as I continued reading, the more I found myself feeling more and more moved by the prose. The way the author conveyed David's inner turmoil, his worries, his anxiety, both physically and mentally was incredibly heart wrenching. For anyone who has ever lost a loved one, there will undoubtedly be aspects of this book which trigger memories and feelings from such difficult times but at the same time there was some solace to be found via David's character and his journey to acceptance.

By the end of the book, I felt very overwhelmed by my own memories and feelings and that was when I knew that this book had done something that many books do not manage to do. It had connected to me on a more emotional level and perhaps it will not happen for everyone who reads it, but I do think it is worth the read especially if you enjoy Japanese slice-of-life literature and fiction which delves deeply into the human condition.

Thoroughly enjoyed it and I really look forward to more of Mette Jakobsen's books in the future!

[Deborah Allin · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novel is a beautiful exploration of a father's reaction to the disappearance and suicide of his only son, Ben and of the consequences grief, hope and denial have on a couple's relationship. Jackobson deftly weaves a portrait of the aftermath of loss from the father's perspective and through the key family relationships which comprise the tapestry of his life, his troubled relaionship with an emotionally detached mother, a brother hiding his own secrets and a wife who loves but struggles with her husband's increasingly distancing behaviour.

I loved the way the key relationships in the father's life were slowly etched through his return to Newtown, the inner city suburb Ben lived in until his disappearance. Letting go of ones we love and lose is never easy and made more complex by longings we may have had to be closer never fulfilled, and this is the journey which David must make in the course of a touching novel.

This is Mette Jackobson's second novel and I can't wait to read her first.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

David’s son, Ben, died in an apparent suicide, but David keeps seeing Ben everywhere he goes. His once loving and passionate relationship with his wife, Vera, is threatened as he becomes more and more convinced that he needs to find Ben.

What The Light Hides is a short but undeniably beautiful novel. The prose is absolutely stunning and the themes Mette Jakobsen deals in are tangible and vivid. The story is well-contained and never feels vague or uncertain.

[Meg · Rating 5 out of 5]

An evocative heartbreaking read. Realistic in the way suicide divides people and causes us to question our reason to continue living our lives the way we did before experiencing it. I loved the strength of Vera and David’s relationship despite the distance Ben’s suicide caused. Very human, sensual and realistic in its portrayal of family dysfunction in the wake of tragedy.

[Ian Lambert · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. It's a quick and straightforward read with just enough details to hint at a much larger story. At times it feels a bit thin and a bit romanticised but it's likeable.

[TheCosyDragon · Rating 4 out of 5]

This review has been crossposted from my blog at The Cosy Dragon . Please head there for more in-depth reviews by me, which appear on a timely schedule.

Ben has committed suicide, leaving behind his devastated parents. As a boy full of life, his father David is left trying to come to terms to his death, by trying to find out the situations that lead to it. Is it his fault as a parent? Or is it something unique to his son.

At times, I felt exactly as David did about his son. Ben couldn’t be dead. It was painfully clear that David’s self-deception as a character came through as an unreliable narrator. This was such powerful writing, and I could feel all of the characters leaping out of their pages like real people.

This ‘romance’ is all I wanted to refresh me after finishing a dud. It’s not primarily a romance, it is more an in depth look into what happens to a variety of relationships when traumatic life events happen. Suicide, alcoholism, break-ins, dementia; this novel covers the whole spectrum of upsetting events with ease and without feeling like the author is trying to push an agenda down your throat.

What more praise can I have? I felt like I was walking the streets of Sydney and the mountain homes. I could see David’s work taking shape, and imagine previous masterpieces. My only complaint would be that I didn’t get to hear more about Vera’s work. Ah well. I can’t have everything! What I had was satisfyingly enough.

It’s not a reread for me, but I did really enjoy it and had trouble putting it down (I finished it off in basically one sitting). 4 very healthy stars from me.

[Corinne Johnston · Rating 5 out of 5]

I sought out this after reading 'The Wingmaker'. I read this short novel in a day, in between gardening. What a sad and poignant read, Mette is so empathetic about love, death and grief. A perfect little book.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautiful but brief.

[Kerryn Lawson]

A beautiful heartbreaking story of loss and healing.