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Fantasy Collective #3
The Worm Returns
Way out West, a tough-as-nails bank robber becomes Earth’s last hope…
Bad Buffalo is a rootin’ tootin’ sharp-shootin’ son of a gun.
He’s also the meanest gunfighter the West has ever known. When Bad Buffalo comes to town, people get out of Dodge. Literally. His only friend is a horse named Horse.
But when Bad Buffalo meets Dia the fairy, she begs for his help. Intergalactic parasites have returned to raid the planet and suck the Earth dry of its magic. And when the magic is gone, the Earth will stop turning on its axis.
So, have gun will travel—through space and time. Can this unlikely pair save the Earth from utter destruction?
Bad Buffalo is a rootin’ tootin’ sharp-shootin’ son of a gun.
He’s also the meanest gunfighter the West has ever known. When Bad Buffalo comes to town, people get out of Dodge. Literally. His only friend is a horse named Horse.
But when Bad Buffalo meets Dia the fairy, she begs for his help. Intergalactic parasites have returned to raid the planet and suck the Earth dry of its magic. And when the magic is gone, the Earth will stop turning on its axis.
So, have gun will travel—through space and time. Can this unlikely pair save the Earth from utter destruction?
- GenresFantasy
156 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 5, 2016
43 people are currently reading
105 people want to read
About the author
J.R. Rain
689 books1,728 followersJ.R. Rain is the author of 110 novels and counting. He lives on an island in the Pacific Northwest, where he's hard at work on his next novel... and fighting off sparkly vampires.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
June 13, 2017
The Worm Returns, by J.R.Rain and Piers Anthony
This was a fun, fun read. I am convinced that Anthony and Rain were revisting their 14-year old, junior high selves when writing this novel, as only a going-through-puberty male could be so hilariously obsessed with sex, genetalia, and bodily functions. I'm sure they wrote this while staring at the life-sized poster of Pam Anderson in her iconic red Baywatch swim suit each had hanging on their wall.
When I first started reading this novel, I was a bit apprehensive. The writing was so simple, it almost seemed like a children's book, but that thought was quickly swept away. Yes, the writing is simple, but so are the characters. There's Bad Buffalo, a rootin', tootin' cowboy who seldom bathes and shoots anything he doesn't understand (which is everything), and his horse, Horse. There is Dia, the wood sprite of many sizes and undeniable female charms. Dia, using that time-proven tactic of getting what you want by promising sexual favors, convinces the uneducated, ill-mannered Bad Buffalo (BB) to help her rid the world of the aliens who are sucking it dry of magic. He agrees, because that's the only way Dia can get enough magic to become human sized and fulfill her sexual promises. And, where BB goes, Horse goes. So, the three of them set off to plug all the wormholes the aliens are using to travel to the earth. Soon, they are using said wormholes to travel to other worlds in order to find help in their quest to save magic on earth. Along the way they team up with a world of bugs that can repel the magic leeching entities invading earth, a sentient caterpillar robot to guide them through the wormholes, a cockatrice named Crag, and a were-horse named Marey. Can they defeat the enemies and solve the problems so magic can return to earth, Dia can become human sized and BB can have her promises fulfilled?
So much fun. The writing is simple, yet true to the storyline. The characters are diverse and amazing. The adventures predictable, yet hilarious and oddly satisfying. Lots of puns and plays on words and Dia had to have a massive headache from the eye-rolling she must have endured. This is not meant to be a serious drama, it's pure fun. And it delivers.
Did I find errors. Only two, and both in the same spot. At about 428 on my Kindle:
...that didn't seem to right to Bad Buffalo.
Should this be "didn't seem to right to Bad Buffalo" or
maybe "didn't seem too right to Bad Buffalo."
and
He knew darn well had gotten into him
(insert "what" between well and had to make the
sentence make sense).
But that was outweighed by all the chuckle worthy prose, mostly at the expense of the main character. For instance:
Once, he heard someone say that he was ambidextrous.
Bad Buffalo shot him, of course. No one calls Bad Buffalo
names he ain't ever heard of.
or maybe this exchange between Marey and Bad Buffalo:
Marey: "...I have decades of abstinence to make up for,
and damned if I'll wait on the equine cycles."
Bad Buffalo: "Absinthe's strong, all right,..."
I think Rain and Anthony had a very good time writing this novel. And it shows. The good thing is that the reader has an even better time reading it.
This was a fun, fun read. I am convinced that Anthony and Rain were revisting their 14-year old, junior high selves when writing this novel, as only a going-through-puberty male could be so hilariously obsessed with sex, genetalia, and bodily functions. I'm sure they wrote this while staring at the life-sized poster of Pam Anderson in her iconic red Baywatch swim suit each had hanging on their wall.
When I first started reading this novel, I was a bit apprehensive. The writing was so simple, it almost seemed like a children's book, but that thought was quickly swept away. Yes, the writing is simple, but so are the characters. There's Bad Buffalo, a rootin', tootin' cowboy who seldom bathes and shoots anything he doesn't understand (which is everything), and his horse, Horse. There is Dia, the wood sprite of many sizes and undeniable female charms. Dia, using that time-proven tactic of getting what you want by promising sexual favors, convinces the uneducated, ill-mannered Bad Buffalo (BB) to help her rid the world of the aliens who are sucking it dry of magic. He agrees, because that's the only way Dia can get enough magic to become human sized and fulfill her sexual promises. And, where BB goes, Horse goes. So, the three of them set off to plug all the wormholes the aliens are using to travel to the earth. Soon, they are using said wormholes to travel to other worlds in order to find help in their quest to save magic on earth. Along the way they team up with a world of bugs that can repel the magic leeching entities invading earth, a sentient caterpillar robot to guide them through the wormholes, a cockatrice named Crag, and a were-horse named Marey. Can they defeat the enemies and solve the problems so magic can return to earth, Dia can become human sized and BB can have her promises fulfilled?
So much fun. The writing is simple, yet true to the storyline. The characters are diverse and amazing. The adventures predictable, yet hilarious and oddly satisfying. Lots of puns and plays on words and Dia had to have a massive headache from the eye-rolling she must have endured. This is not meant to be a serious drama, it's pure fun. And it delivers.
Did I find errors. Only two, and both in the same spot. At about 428 on my Kindle:
...that didn't seem to right to Bad Buffalo.
Should this be "didn't seem to right to Bad Buffalo" or
maybe "didn't seem too right to Bad Buffalo."
and
He knew darn well had gotten into him
(insert "what" between well and had to make the
sentence make sense).
But that was outweighed by all the chuckle worthy prose, mostly at the expense of the main character. For instance:
Once, he heard someone say that he was ambidextrous.
Bad Buffalo shot him, of course. No one calls Bad Buffalo
names he ain't ever heard of.
or maybe this exchange between Marey and Bad Buffalo:
Marey: "...I have decades of abstinence to make up for,
and damned if I'll wait on the equine cycles."
Bad Buffalo: "Absinthe's strong, all right,..."
I think Rain and Anthony had a very good time writing this novel. And it shows. The good thing is that the reader has an even better time reading it.
October 8, 2022
Entertaining fantasy listening 🎶🔰
Another will written fantasy world 🌎 haunting with a western twist adventure thriller novel by J. R. Rain ☔ and Piers Anthony. About a bad cowboy trapped in a fantasy world 🌎 with a beautiful fairy, his horse 🐎, dragon 🐉, and other marvels. With luck and magic they escape back to earth 🌎 and a new life. I would highly recommend this novel and author to 👍 readers of fantasy adventure thriller mysteries. Enjoy the adventure of reading or listening. 2022 👑👒😕🗾
Another will written fantasy world 🌎 haunting with a western twist adventure thriller novel by J. R. Rain ☔ and Piers Anthony. About a bad cowboy trapped in a fantasy world 🌎 with a beautiful fairy, his horse 🐎, dragon 🐉, and other marvels. With luck and magic they escape back to earth 🌎 and a new life. I would highly recommend this novel and author to 👍 readers of fantasy adventure thriller mysteries. Enjoy the adventure of reading or listening. 2022 👑👒😕🗾
April 17, 2020
Cute
Cute is about all I can say about this story of sprites, gunslinger and horse .
The story was well written and would make a nice children's book with very little editing.
Good read for the world right now.
Cute is about all I can say about this story of sprites, gunslinger and horse .
The story was well written and would make a nice children's book with very little editing.
Good read for the world right now.
March 16, 2021
Puerile fun
Very silly but amusing and well written. Fun as escapist nonsense, the story rattles along and little is wasted in the telling
Very silly but amusing and well written. Fun as escapist nonsense, the story rattles along and little is wasted in the telling
March 22, 2022
Great fun!
I loved this story. Fun and original! Excellent work from two remarkable authors. Humorous, light reading with a pinch of naughty.
I loved this story. Fun and original! Excellent work from two remarkable authors. Humorous, light reading with a pinch of naughty.
January 27, 2024
Interesting
The book had an interesting pull,it was interesting, would I read again, not. There was something missing for me.I gave it five star because the concept was good.
The book had an interesting pull,it was interesting, would I read again, not. There was something missing for me.I gave it five star because the concept was good.
February 19, 2024
As soon as Dia said “my plump little ass will be yours for the taking” I was done.
Fortunately that was in chapter 1.
Going in the DNF pile.
Fortunately that was in chapter 1.
Going in the DNF pile.
April 5, 2016
Come witness a highly entertaining, word-slinging duel between masterful storytellers J.R. Rain and Piers Anthony. You can literally see them writing their characters into crazy predicaments and handing the reins of the story to the other; while also weaving a solid, and hysterical adventure. Who wins? We the readers do, of course! (I bet the authors had a blast too)
Buffalo Bill isn't your typical hero. He isn't a hero at all until a buxom, blueberry-blonde pixie leads him around by his... nose. Their adventure to save earth's magic from intergalactic worms is completely insane, hilarious, and even a little naughty. This was a fun and guilty read. I have no regrets!
The humor in this story is in the vein of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Young Frankenstein, or Blazing Saddles. So, if you can't appreciate the humor in those classic flicks this may not be the story for you. If you can, then you'll love it!!
Warning: Do not attempt to read this book and partake in a beverage at the same time. To do so could lead to unfortunate circumstances. --- You've been warned.
Buffalo Bill isn't your typical hero. He isn't a hero at all until a buxom, blueberry-blonde pixie leads him around by his... nose. Their adventure to save earth's magic from intergalactic worms is completely insane, hilarious, and even a little naughty. This was a fun and guilty read. I have no regrets!
The humor in this story is in the vein of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Young Frankenstein, or Blazing Saddles. So, if you can't appreciate the humor in those classic flicks this may not be the story for you. If you can, then you'll love it!!
Warning: Do not attempt to read this book and partake in a beverage at the same time. To do so could lead to unfortunate circumstances. --- You've been warned.
July 31, 2016
Wow, hard one to comment on. I grabbed it because the Author was Piers Anthony and his writing style really comes through. The story reads a bit like a young teen style but it had adult pieces in it as well. It is a perfect palette cleanser between more serious books.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews