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Lightspeed Magazine, March 2016

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LIGHTSPEED is an online science fiction and fantasy magazine. In its pages, you will find science fiction: from near-future, sociological soft SF, to far-future, star-spanning hard SF--and fantasy: from epic fantasy, sword-and-sorcery, and contemporary urban tales, to magical realism, science-fantasy, and folktales.

This month, we have original science fiction by Caroline M. Yoachim ("Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station") and Craig DeLancey ("RedKing"), along with SF reprints by Timons Esaias ("The Mars Convention") and Aliette de Bodard ("The Waiting Stars").
Plus, we have original fantasy by Rich Larson ("Sparks Fly") and Marie Vibbert ("Michael Doesn't Hate His Mother"), and fantasy reprints by Andy Duncan ("The Premature Burials") and Seanan McGuire ("Rat-Catcher"). All that, and of course we also have our usual assortment of author spotlights, along with our book and media review columns and a roundtable interview on the Star Wars canon. For our ebook readers, we also have an ebook-exclusive reprint Mark W. Tiedemann's novella, "Miller's Wife." And for our novel excerpt this month, we're proud to present a preview of Hugh Howey's novel, SHIFT, out now from our editor's new book line for Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, John Joseph Adams Books.

287 pages, Kindle Edition

First published March 1, 2016

5 people are currently reading
381 people want to read

About the author

John Joseph Adams

367 books982 followers
John Joseph Adams is the series editor of BEST AMERICAN SCIENCE FICTION AND FANTASY. He is also the bestselling editor of many other anthologies, such as ROBOT UPRISINGS, DEAD MAN'S HAND, BRAVE NEW WORLDS,WASTELANDS, and THE LIVING DEAD. Recent and forthcoming books include WHAT THE #@&% IS THAT?, OPERATION ARCANA, PRESS START TO PLAY, LOOSED UPON THE WORLD, and THE APOCALYPSE TRIPTYCH (consisting of THE END IS NIGH, THE END IS NOW, and THE END HAS COME). Called “the reigning king of the anthology world” by Barnes & Noble, John is a two-time winner of the Hugo Award (for which he has been nominated nine times), is a seven-time World Fantasy Award finalist, and served as a judge for the 2015 National Book Award. John is also the editor and publisher of the digital magazines LIGHTSPEED and NIGHTMARE, and is a producer for Wired's THE GEEK'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY podcast. You can find him online at www.johnjosephadams.com and on Twitter @JohnJosephAdams.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 80 reviews
Profile Image for carol. .
1,760 reviews9,991 followers
September 4, 2022
Ed. Note: "Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station" was initially reviewed here and then was merged with the magazine.

An entertaining short story that plays with the formatting of the infamous "Choose Your Own Adventure" books. Set in a space station where you, the protagonist, have been bitten by an unfamiliar insect, it cleverly packs in a lot of social and literary commentary in a short piece.

For those unfamiliar with the format (how could this be?), 'Choose Your Own Adventure' books were a popular series of books that would give the reader a choice of action every couple of pages. There were a variety of endings, which often led to page flipping for better outcomes. In this story, however, Yachim anticipates a reader who is inclined to be quarrelsome with options and unlikely to follow the rules. Her approach is clear by point 'B,' where she chastises the reader for not making the other choice. At one point, she bluntly calls out reader skipping around (who, me?):

"Q. There is nothing in the story that directs you to this section, so if you are reading this, you have failed to follow instructions. Go directly to Or skip to somewhere else, since you clearly aren’t playing by the rules anyway."

I had to laugh at her mockery of the ever-present safety signs that say "Days Since Death" Instead of encouraging, I always found them somewhat demoralizing. The adolescent running joke about the nurse from Uranus made me laugh out loud. As a hospital employee, I rather appreciated the digs at the medical/insurance system. There's fun little literary commentary about the physics of gravity and unforeshadowed physical powers in science fiction books. The nice bit of nihilist philosophy around letter 'S' also made me laugh, although it probably shouldn't have:

"In the clinic, as in life, decisions that seem important are often ultimately meaningless. In the end, all of us will die and none of this will matter. Now seriously, go to T."

Damn those rashes! I'll definitely have to check out more by Yoachim.

Bummed up the rating for Yoachim's story, which is oh-so-re-readable and still makes me smile.

http://www.lightspeedmagazine.com/fic...


*********************************************

Now, for the rest of the issue.

Here's what happened: "Welcome to the Medical Clinic..." is awesome enough that I thought I should stop reading it for free and decided to buy the home issue. The sci-fi stories were good to great (bonus Bodard story!) and the 'fantasy' stories were pretty close to lame. I'd say most of the 'fantasy' felt more like 'horror' genre over fantasy. All four/five seemed very focused on some version of male sexuality (coming of age, being fascinated by a woman). Started with a bang, ended with a fizzle (cough, cough). I can see why they would need to do special issues on Women in Fantasy.

Science Fiction

Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station /Hours Since the Last Patient Death: 0 by Caroline M. Yoachim
--competely hysterical send off of choose-your-own-adventure books, wry/cynical medical version. 5 stars

The Mars Convention by Timons Esaias
-Interesting. Convention of alien anthropologists, scientists and enthusiasts meeting to discuss the Earth cannon. Explores the meta significance of objects and culture in an obvious convention analogy. Somewhat profound. 4 stars.

RedKing by Craig DeLancey
-Cyberhack/cyberpunk sci-fi where a computer hacker who works with the police helps them with a hacker releasing the RedKing virus, responsible for a number of suicides and homicides. A touch incomprehensible at times with computer babble, nonetheless good. 4 stars.

The Waiting Stars by Aliette de Bodard
-a parallel story about a women who grew up in an orphanage "saved from the squalor and danger among the savages and brought forward into the light of civilisation" and a Vietnamese woman and her cousin who set off on a mission to rescue her great-aunt--and ship-mind--from the Outsiders' derelict graveyard. 5 stars.

Fantasy

The Premature Burials by Andy Duncan
-eh. Horror more than fantasy, with a definite feeling of Sexy Poe. (Yep, that's a "Ew."). Competent, but not to my taste. 2 stars.

Sparks Fly by Rich Larson
-A guy who has an ostracized condition, 'sparks' meets a fabulous girl. Not really fantasy as much as magical realism, wish-fulfillment version. Meh. Would have been more interesting if it was about the world, not about the character's own insecurities getting together with a girl. 2.5 stars

Rat-Catcher by Seanan McGuire
-As always, McGuire does much more interesting with shorts. A tale of the Cait Sidhe. 4 stars.

Michael Doesn't Hate His Mother by Marie Vibbert.
-Horror-fiction and a houses with a mother and an adolescent son and a young daughter. 3 stars.

Novella

Millers Wife by Mark W. Tiedemann

-John Irving does small-town creepy. Weird sex-female stuff, woman-as-fertility and all that crap. Lame and eye-rolling. I can't believe Adams thought this worth publishing. 1 star.

Novel Excerpts

Shift by Hugh Howey: skipped

Nonfiction

Movie Review: Deadpool; Book Reviews: March 2016; Interview: Chuck Wendig and Alexandra Bracken (Guide to the New Star Wars Canon): skipped.

Author Spotlights

Caroline M. Yoachim, Andy Duncan, Timons Esaias, Rich Larson, Craig Delancey, Seanan McGuire, Aliette de Bodard, Marie Vibbert, Mark W. Tiedemann. Interesting depending on the author and interviewer. Bodard's was insightful.

Miscellany: Coming Attractions, Stay Connected, Subscriptions and Ebooks, About the Lightspeed Team, Also Edited by John Joseph Adams. Glanced at it.
Profile Image for Tadiana ✩Night Owl☽.
1,880 reviews23.3k followers
November 8, 2016
Final review, first posted on Fantasy Literature:

You live and work in a space station. One day, on your way to work, you take a shortcut through the hydroponics bay and are bitten on the hand by a tiny insect that was part of an infestation on the tomato plants. Your hand begins to swell and turn purple in the area of the bite. What to do?
You run down a long metal hallway to the Medical Clinic, grateful for the artificially generated gravity that defies the laws of physics and yet is surprisingly common in fictional space stations. The sign on the clinic door says “hours since the last patient death:” The number currently posted on the sign is zero. If you enter the clinic anyway, go to C. If you seek medical care elsewhere, go to B.
Choosing part B takes your story in one direction; part C leads you in a different direction … or, well, maybe not!

This is a humorously pessimistic short story, inspired by the old CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE series of children’s books. There are ugly infections, venomous aliens, a truly abysmal space station medical clinic, and death and danger at every turn. “Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station” is light and breezy and definitely good for some laughs, especially if you ever read a CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE book and (like me) often peeked at both options to see which looked more likely to work out for the best, or read the book multiple times until you got one of the good endings.

Free online at Lightspeed Magazine.
Profile Image for Evelina | AvalinahsBooks.
925 reviews472 followers
September 26, 2016
Haha! This was so funny. This short read very neatly summarizes the experiences of a person at a hospital/clinic in allegorical form. All I can say is that when I was in hospital last week, it was precisely the same. Minus all those aliens. Although some of them looked like it. I laughed. Worth a read.
Profile Image for Steven.
1,250 reviews452 followers
Read
March 10, 2017
I know I read this last year at some point, but apparently never marked it as read on here or accidentally deleted it from my shelves?
Profile Image for Sarah.
3,358 reviews1,236 followers
September 7, 2017
Rat-Catcher is a short story that was originally published in the A Fantasy Medley 2 anthology but can also be read online for free on the Lightspeed Magazine website.

I'm crazy about Tybalt so any story we can get from his point of view is a definite must read for me! Rat-Catcher is actually set long before the main series starts (although I'd recommend reading at least Rosemary and Rue first so you're familiar with Tybalt's character) way back when Tybalt was still just a prince called Rand and his father was the King of Cats.

I found it really interesting to see a younger, less confident version of Tybalt and I really loved the bond he shared with his two sisters. If you're familiar with the main series then you probably already know that princes have to kill the current king in order to claim the throne, in some cases princes challenge their king just because they long for power but that wasn't the case with Tybalt - he did it to protect his sisters and the rest of the Court of Cats which makes him the kind of leader that they both want and need.

I really enjoyed this glimpse into Tybalt's past and I'm definitely looking forward to reading the rest of the short stories from his point of view!
Profile Image for Jen.
3,448 reviews27 followers
November 21, 2019
GRL strike again, lol!

Thank you Corinne for the correct title for my review.

This is for the story Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station.

Original review below.

Quick read. I like the snark and the dark view of the medical system. I like how it all loops. Kind of like life. Four stars. Worth reading.
Profile Image for Alina.
865 reviews313 followers
January 6, 2021
"Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station" by Caroline M. Yoachim
I really liked this, it was playful and funny. The situation, pretty much like in our healthcare system, though I don't find that particular association amusing..
Profile Image for Julie.
1,032 reviews297 followers
June 12, 2017
I checked this out based purely on the intriguing title, but it wound up being my everything. If you've ever played a Choose Your Own Adventure book, you really need to read this. It's a quick little story that nonetheless rewards close reading and also repetition and loops, as it riffs on the health care system with a sci fi setting that reminds me of Douglas Adams' playfulness. I try not to compare that many authors to him because not everyone deserves the comparison, but Yoachim definitely does: I literally laughed out loud during this, which is rare enough in fiction, and found myself so charmed with the innovative structure and authorial asides.

Read it for free here: http://www.lightspeedmagazine.com/fic...

(Read on June 12, 2017, but not logged because I don't want short stories skewing my reading challenge.)
Profile Image for Jerry Jose.
379 reviews63 followers
February 21, 2017
Such a short and fun read. My face was fixed in the :D smiley all through the read.

Remember those novel games, choose your ending stories, where end of each part gives you a choice based on which you will be directed to a page for further advancement. And about the content, title itself says a great deal than I can even attempt to.

Yoachim had done that in a one page short story with 26 parts (thanks to English alphabets), with the undertone of quirky, dark gallows humour.

available here lightspeedmagazine
Profile Image for Wealhtheow.
2,465 reviews605 followers
May 21, 2017
You are a nameless human person on a space station seeking medical care. The story of your attempt to get treated is told in the form of a choose your own adventure. Inevitably, every effort you make just worsens your condition. The format evoked a small amount of humor, example:
"Q. There is nothing in the story that directs you to this section, so if you are reading this, you have failed to follow instructions. Go directly to Z and die your horrible, painful death. Or skip to somewhere else, since you clearly aren’t playing by the rules anyway."
but I just didn't find it that funny. And there's nothing else to it; no personalities, no plot, no worldbuilding.

Nominated for a Nebula award. Can be read online here
Profile Image for Daiva.
198 reviews1 follower
November 1, 2016
It is not every day that I change my mind about the rating (and usually I stick to the first/original one, since most likely I would give the book less stars than more), but I keep remembering this short story and it is a strong indication that it did leave an impression. So yeah, in my opinion this means that it deserves all that I can give.
Profile Image for Lovesfrost.
47 reviews16 followers
February 21, 2017
3.5 actually.....
This was short and fun !!.Okay maybe not so much fun because I love my arm :P
Profile Image for Samantha.
272 reviews35 followers
November 12, 2016
In this we get Tybalt's POV at the time he was Rand, and we got to see the politics inside the Court of Cats and when Rand became Tybalt the King of Cats we all know! It was nice to see that although he had to kill his Father to become King, he only did what was best for his people. He didn't kill his Father just for power, but for the power to protect his people and his family. I love seeing that Tybalt was never the typical Cait Sidhe, and was surprised to see Sylvester's sister in this and that her name was September, and that her and Tybalt had a special relationship. Anyway I wonder if we will ever see Tybalt's sister again and see how he made it to where he is now, and if it's the same court he took over in the first place or if there's another King in life he to defeat. This is a good short story for anybody that want's some Tybalt backstory.
Profile Image for Mangrii.
1,138 reviews481 followers
February 5, 2017
Un divertida historia al modo "elige tu propia aventura" que te llevará a vivir que harías tras ser mordido por un insecto minúsculo en tu mano. Ligera y rápida de leer, un pedacito de humor de ciencia ficción con cierta alegoría a cualquier visita al médico.
Profile Image for Maddalena.
400 reviews6 followers
July 5, 2017
Seanan McGuire’s October Daye novels are by far my favorite UF series, both for the fascinating juxtaposition of the fae realms with our own world and for the amazing characters moving through both. And if protagonist October is a joy to read as her journey continues through the series, there are some other characters I’ve come to deeply care about, the foremost being Tybalt, King of Cats. So imagine my delighted surprise when, scanning the stories on offer at LightSpeed Magazine, I came across this one, where Tybalt is the absolute star [...]


Full review at SPACE and SORCERY BLOG
Profile Image for L ✨.
431 reviews12 followers
January 31, 2025
Welcome to the Medical Clinic at the Interplanetary Relay Station was such a fun read: it used the choice of game format and added a new twist to it. It reminded me of the "choose your own adventure" books I've read as a kid.
Profile Image for Ina.
233 reviews46 followers
February 16, 2017
3.5 stars

Why are October Daye short stories always so sad? I love how Tybalt (Rand) was described in this story. He was a dreamer. He liked humans and he wanted to stay out of the problems of Cat Court and violence it represented. However, he didn't have a choice in the end and he did what seemed right.

There are some questions I have after reading this short story and I hope they will be answered in the future: Where is Colleen now? Where is September now? How is she connected to Sylvester? (Mother, maybe?) I really hope I will get my answers later.
Profile Image for Mai.
114 reviews42 followers
March 14, 2016
Collections and anthologies usually are a mixed bag for me - and this issue was no different: Some stories I liked more than others, but overall I enjoyed all of them. Rat-catcher by Seanan McGuire certainly was my highlight, the reason I bought this. Because...well, Tybalt!!! There really doesn't need any other reason ;)
And it turned out to be a 4-5-stars read as expected. But - I'm also quite content with the rest of issue (3 stars for: I had a good time) and it won't be my last one for sure.
Profile Image for Tessa in Mid-Michigan.
1,574 reviews62 followers
September 26, 2016
Great short story! Lots of fun and pun. I always hated those "Choose your Ending" stories, but this one is more making fun of that whole concept than letting you choose. Read it and weep. Heh.
Profile Image for Mercurybard.
467 reviews5 followers
September 1, 2017
“Everyone dies.”

In the books, everyone talks about how cruel and vicious the Cait Sidhe can be. Here, we get a glimpse of the Court of Fogborn Cats where Tybalt grew up in Shakespeare's London. His "father", Ainmire, assigned each of his Princes (who were bought, not born to him) a sister to keep them in line. Of course, Jill--Tybalt's special sister--is murdered by the king when Tybalt fails in his first attempt at a coup (all Tybalt wants is the court to evacuate London before the prophesied fire, but Ainmire won't listen). I hated that bit, though I understand why it had to happen.

"My fear and anxiety were gone, replaced by a cold core of anger." This is where Rand puts his name aside and becomes Tybalt and a king. Luckily, as we see in "No Sooner Met", it does not break him.

I want to know more about September, who you meet here, and more about her friendship with Rand (Tybalt).
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Killian.
834 reviews26 followers
October 25, 2016
This short is not super easy to find, but after the out-of-print anthology finally sold out Lightspeed put it online. Here you go, to save you from googling it.

Anyway, this was a little peek into Tybalt's coming of age. The story has already been hinted at in the cannon, but these are the actual events. Didn't know he was from London, and definitely didn't know he knew Janurary's mother. Interesting... A nice little read, but I'm not sure how much cannon is involved.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 80 reviews

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