X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever

X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever #1-5

by Max Bemis, Ruth Redmond (Illustrator), Michael Walsh (Illustrator)

Bailey Hoskins has just discovered that he's a mutant. For someone who's never been special, never stood out, this could be his big moment. But as he gains entry into the halls of Xavier's School for Gifted Children, what exactly is his gift? He's used to being hated, but is he anything to be feared? Bailey struggles to find a place alongside his fellow students, but the X-Universe is a big one - perhaps Mystique will see his potential. Or could Magneto have just the mission for him? Max Bemis, front man of the band Say Anything, makes his Marvel debut with the story of a misfit among misfits, just trying to fit in. Bailey Hoskins? Worst. X-Man. Ever.

COLLECTING: X-MEN: WORST X-MAN EVER 1-5

Genres: Comics, Graphic Novels, Marvel, X Men, Superheroes, Humor, Graphic Novels Comics

112 pages, Paperback

First published August 24, 2016

Reviews

[Sam Quixote · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bailey is an ordinary high school kid who doesn’t fit in anywhere - until he discovers he’s really a mutant and belongs in the X-Men! Except his power is to explode. Once. And he can’t re-form, he just dies. He’s basically a suicide bomber who doesn’t need to strap on any explosives. So.... pretty much a worthless mutant power. Worst X-Man Ever!

Max Bemis and Michael Walsh’s book isn’t bad but it’s also nothing special. It’s accessible to new readers as it exists outside of continuity as a standalone book with the classic setup: Xavier, Cyclops and Wolverine are all alive and the school’s still going, Magneto and the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants are the baddies, etc.

The book is essentially highlighting the weird world of the X-Men to readers new and old through the eyes of someone experiencing it first-hand, Bailey. It has this subversive tone to it that’s amusing and makes it stand out. Bailey is a Marvel fanboy who gets screwed over again and again by the things he thought he loved: his parents are stomped by a Sentinel, the first supervillain lackey he tries to fight ends up suing him for abuse, and his superhero name, X-Ceptional, is embarrassingly ironic and mock-able.

It doesn’t have much of a story though. Bailey goes through Xavier’s school meeting familiar characters, then he meets Magneto, then we’re into that X-Men staple: the dystopian future. Being generic doesn’t make for a gripping read in the least and it’s very easy to put down. The two new mutant characters, Rags and Riches, are also really lame.

There is a new character that’s interesting though who’s basically the embodiment of Marvel Editorial, taking the book’s waggishness further by unexpectedly shattering the fourth wall in the finale. And Michael Walsh’s art was pretty good throughout but nothing amazing.

Worst X-Man Ever is far from being the worst X-Men book ever. It’s a decent comic but it’s also quite forgettable and not terribly engaging. Still, I’d rec this one over the current range of appalling X-titles easily!

[Chad · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bailey is an ordinary teenager who wishes to be something more, to stand out in some way. He's ecstatic to find out he might be a mutant until he discovers his powers. He can make himself blow up...once. He's basically a suicide bomber. So he tags along as an intern for the gazillion X-Men teams. Then he meets a fellow mutant who makes people forget things and that's where things start to get meta. She's basically Marvel's editorial department imagined as a mutant.

The Good: The series is interesting and worth a read.

The Bad: The jokes mostly fell flat for me.

The Ugly: The series had a lot of unfulfilled potential and missed its mark.

[Paul · Rating 4 out of 5]

Writer Max Bemis uses this book to make a few comments about the world of the X-Men (and occasionally the larger Marvel universe and the superhero genre in general), not by having his characters break the fourth wall but by having the events of the story itself do it instead.

The result is one of the most 'meta' comicbooks I've ever read... and it's a damned funny one too. If you've been reading superhero comics for a while (or, as in my case, what seems like forever) you can't help but be a little jaded by some of the tropes and perpetual 'all-new all-different' relaunches which inevitably relapse back to the status quo the second sales start to dip. Folks, this book is for you.

You really can't help but feel for Bailey, the titular 'worst X-Man ever', whose mutant power is to explode... just the once... fatally. Being a mutant who daren't ever use his power, he becomes an outcast amongst outcasts at the Xavier School. That doesn't mean he's not going to see any action, of course... Especially when the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants come knocking...

I loved most of this book but have only given it four stars because it dips a little in issue four. I think the editor could have had a firmer hand and whittled this down to four issues instead of five. This would have made for a leaner and more consistently funny book.

[Craig · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a cute single-shot X story with considerable clever sly pokes at the Marvel Universe, particularly the prolific number of X-teams. I think I would have liked it better if it had been flown under the "What if?" banner, but it was still fun. Remember the old Warner Brothers cartoon where Daffy Duck is a magician, and he straps dynamite all over himself, and he remarks that the problem with his greatest trick is that he can only do it once? Well, this is like is like that, only with mutants. The art isn't bad but is unremarkable; it has that kind of sparse computer-generated look. It's definitely a kids' book, but with several cool lines, like describing Xavier's School as a Hogwarts for future dead people.

[Molly™☺ · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a lot better than I was expecting it to be. It explores the X-Men from an outside perspective and adds a nice underlying tone of meta commentary. Unfortunately, I don't think it's quite as smart or well executed as it thinks it is. Many plot points seem to lead nowhere, and there are big pacing issues that are further let down by the ultimate payoff which seems extremely rushed and somewhat undeserved. I also feel like pre-established X-Men aren't interpreted correctly and act out of character most of the time. It's such a good premise, I just wish that it had reached its maximum potential.

[Jerecho · Rating 3 out of 5]

Story - 3.0
Graphics - 2.5

[Baba · Rating 3 out of 5]

A surprisingly clever little limited series! A young mutant with the worse power ever (he can only use it once, and if he does he dies). The story plays around the idea of how his power makes him an outsider among the outsiders. Nice concept, some great comedic moments and good art 7 out of 12.

[Josh · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was quite entertaining for what it was: a satirical take on comics - more specifically on X-comics. Bemis introduces Bailey, a new character, who discovers that he is a mutant, like he always wanted! Unfortunately the power he has isn't quite what he dreamed of. I liked this because it was different in an entertaining way. It's not a comic I will buy, but I'm glad I read it.

[James DeSantis · Rating 2 out of 5]

After LOVING Max's take on Foolkiller I decided to try Max's other Marvel work.

Worst X-Man Ever is a spin-off, or elseworld, where a boy finds out what his mutant power is. After having nothing special about him he's ready to explode into the world of the X-men! Except his power is exploding...as in BOOM but then he dies...like that's it. So he works with the X-Men, mostly the new kids, trying to help even though his power has nothing to do with it.

Good: I really enjoyed the start and thought the idea was fun and smart. The ending is also downright fucked up and gotta give em guts for atleast trying to go with that.

Bad: Didn't like the way most of the side characters acted, everyone acted out of character. I also thought the fights were uneventful, the art in general kind of boring, and the pacing sure did have huge issues. Especially on issue 3-4.

Overall it was a okayish story. Not bad but I won't remember it. Either way I hope Max's run of Moonknight is more like Foolkiller and less like Worst X-Man Ever.

[Adam Stone · Rating 2 out of 5]

I liked the premise of this story: a kid with a one-time only terrible power feels just as useless as an X-Man as he did an average teenager, the story just didn't go anywhere. It neither created a really cool elseworld environment, nor exposed any tropes with satire, nor was funny. An Alanis Morisette Ironic joke? In 2016?

None of the characters, except possibly Beast behaved like they would in any other book. Not a single person used their power intelligently. It was a five issue miniseries with one issues worth of ideas.

I don't recommend it.

[Lucille · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well, this whole thing was a weird idea, a cool idea also. 2,5/5. It could have been really good but it wasn't really, it wasn't horrible or baaaad but it wasn't good. I just liked the end but I'm still not sure what to think about it. Also please stop introducing characters that are kinda fat by showing them eating biscuits, that's really disrespectful.

[Sesana · Rating 3 out of 5]

Better than I'd thought it would be. It's very silly, and the joke was getting too long towards the end, but it is a pretty good joke. And there are some great scenes that aren't even trying to be funny, and those make the book.

[Timothy Bakita · Rating 2 out of 5]

Your superpower - explode...and you don't come back.


Such a great premise but horrible conclusion. I really wanted to love this one.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really want a X-Men comic with Miranda as the main protag! I want it!
But anyways, I really did enjoy this little jaunt though the X-Men universe.

[Kay · Rating 4 out of 5]

"...There's not really a point to any of it Bailey. Just to do a bit of good while we can."

Surprisingly, kinda liked this a lot. Maybe a 3.5?
I liked the *wink wink nudge nudge* jokes at the X-Men's expense. I like the fact that our protagonist is a bit of fanboy, that he yearns to be a mutant, to be special and different (is he really just us, the readers?), but discovers he has the worst powers ever. He becomes a non-combatant X-Men, and is completely useless, and hated, and gets sued. It's an amazing X-Men story, really. Both on the nose in your face, and somehow nuanced and subtle.

I especially loved it when Bailey tried to find a place in almost every offshoot X-Men team. It was hilarious!
Also, everyone was so kind to the kid. He essentially has no working powers, but they were trying to be over-inclusive anyway!

The only reason I didn't love this all the way was the ending. Not because it ended with a KABOOM (obviously). I didn't think the ending was sad, which I was honestly nervous about going in. The KABOOM was empowering. It's just the why (re: Riches and Miranda) of it was a little murky.


Riches double-crossing both Magneto and Professor X to rule the world was lame. If he had sided with Magneto and Mutants subjugated humans and everything was a dystopian mess, the ending might have felt more powerful, instead of it being a dystopian mess because Riches wanted to rule as King of everything. I also totally don't get the all-powerful/God-like/Marvel Editor that is Miranda. Sure, it played into the whole *wink wink nudge nudge* Marvel jokes in the volume, but it felt so lame when she was just like "I can't save this world, though I've done it bajillion times before. Sorry!" And then she does... Because Bailey acts first? I don't get that plot point.

I went back and forth on the art, but in the end like it a lot for this story. + the colors were great.

[Alex E · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book asks a question that I frequently asked myself when I was younger. If there is a world where there are mutants and all kinds of variations of powers, there must be some people that get stuck with weird and/or useless powers right?

Things like, the ability to grow your hair quickly! The ability to change color, but only in the dark! The ability to create massive amounts of mucous! You know stuff like that. And this book totally runs with that idea with characters that has the ability to blow himself up....once.

He is a character that very much is a background character in life, and he knows it. He so wants some kind of identity or distinguishing factor that when he is told he is a mutant, he actually celebrates! His enthusiasm is quickly evaporated not only by being told about his useless mutant power, but also disillusioned by the fact that whether its life, the X Mansion, or with the Brotherhood of Evil mutants, he is always the underdog. Always in the background.

The book gets a little meta at the end, but overall, this was a quirky fun story without much depth or consequence.

[Bill Doughty · Rating 3 out of 5]

I mostly liked this - there's some clever metacommentary on superheroes in general and the various X-Men teams in particular, and some genuine laugh-out-loud moments (like when the main character Bailey interns with X-Force), but it trails off a bit in the 4th and 5th issues. Maybe could have / should have been a tighter 4 issue series than a padded 5, but whatever, it was still pretty fun.

[Chelsea · Rating 4 out of 5]

This comic was both dark and funny. Bailey has a tragically comic mutant ability that makes him depressed because he wants to stand out in a cool way, which makes his story an analysis on what it means to be accepted vs an outcast. In the end, he shows that your heart is more important than your abilities. Art style wasn’t bad but a bit odd, which perhaps reflects Bailey’s character.

[Budd · Rating 4 out of 5]

This really picks up on all the x-men tropes and pokes fun of them.

[Jimmy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book had a lot of twist and turns!!! Very good read about wanting to be more.

[Edward Davies · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fans of the X-Men will enjoy this comic dig at the ridiculous powers some heroes have had throughout the history of Marvel comics.

[Aisling · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Alejandro Cabrera Martínez · Rating 4 out of 5]

Un mutante con un poder inutil y completamente incapaz de destacar. Gracias a él uno puede comprender a los X-men y los superhéroes en general a la perfección. Todo bañado con mucha comedia

[Rob McMonigal · Rating 2 out of 5]

A young man wants to be different, and he gets his wish--he's a mutant! But his mutant power is one use only, ala the Daffy Duck gig with the gunpowder and the dynamite. He's the worst X-Man ever in this mini-series that isn't actually a story--it's a collection of inside, snarky jokes about the X-Men.

The story is that Bailey desperately wants to be special, and his attempts keep failing until he musters the confidence to lose himself. If it weren't buried in gags like Wolverine having "Slim not always right" on his blackboard, a reference to Joseph at the "hated mutants" table, and Mystique being absolutely crass about her powers, it might work.

But when you also throw in pot shots at the different X-teams, try to explain why Iron Man is still in his 30s, and reference how awful Gambit it (okay, maybe that's fine!), you lose the ability to tell your affirming story. It just becomes a jumbled mess of story one one page, gag on the next, rinse and repeat through five issues.

Michael Walsh does his best to make the gags work, and his visuals are pretty good at showing humor. But they're also a bit fuzzy and blurred, which works when he's in dark colors. But when we get the X-Men in all their bright glory, the linework can't seem to handle it, and looks like a step was missed.

Overall, a comic where the characters literally talk about how they can't die, so they get to play baseball with each other needs to keep its claws out, not try to be an actual plot. This attempt to blend Mark Evanier-style Not Brand Ech with a heartwarming tale isn't the worst X-Men story every, but it's not very good, either.

[Alex Sarll]

"I don't know how we even get away with calling this a school! It's more like a Hogwarts for future dead people". A sly, but I think still loving, piss-take of the ridiculousness of superhero comics in general and the X-Men in particular, all told through the lens of one poor kid with the worst mutant power ever (yes, even worse than Maggott's): he can explode. Once. And then he'll be dead, because he exploded. Which would have been plenty for a lot of writers new to comics (Bemis' day job is singing in a band I'm too old to be familiar with), but then things take a turn into the Morrisonesque meta, and if anything it gets even funnier. Not bad at all.

[Murphy · Rating 1 out of 5]

This is a satirical story about the way the Marvel Universe functions, primarily involving the mutant teams.

Most of the recognizable characters are more extreme and assholey versions of themselves for the sake of parody, which gets uncomfortable at some parts. The plot is not incredibly meaningful though it seems like it was meant to be, and ends on a fairly depressing note.

Since this series is short I don't feel like I've wasted my time reading it, but it's forgettable and not really worth paying much attention to.

[Matthew Roazen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best X-Men Ever.

Fatalistic, cynical, gritty and at the same time optimistic, romantic, and beautiful. The story pokes fun at X-Men canon and fan expectations and even at the editing process itself. Read it once, you'll raise an eyebrow. Read it twice, you'll shake your head. Read it three times and you'll realize Max Bemis manages to do in a few issues what Watchmen and The Boys took a few hundred pages apiece to do: show us what a real hero has to sacrifice to save the world from absolute power.

[Jason · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fun book with great art that took a turn in the last chapter. Like Sorry to Bother You, I don't think I can discuss it without spoiling it but it was a funny book that turned dark. I'd recommend it but brace yourselves.

[Matthew Lagerloef · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book - putting a kid with a crappy power in the x-men universe makes for a very intriguing read. I don’t think Bemis really sticks the ending, as it feels like it ends somewhat abruptly and lazily, but I loved everything up until that.

[Hailee · Rating 3 out of 5]

A little silly, but I enjoyed it. The MC is an oddball and an unlikely hero. The art fits that vibe. I don't think it's one I'm itching to add to the collection, but I'm glad I read it.