In The Power of Serving Others, the author's overarching philosophy is that serving others is how we find meaning and significance in our lives. His experience suggests that the following three statements are truisms:
1. Everyone has something to give.
2. Everyone can start where they are.
3. Most people are willing to serve others when they see the need and opportunity.
He quotes Morrie (of Tuesdays with Morrie) - "So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."
Robert Coles, a Harvard professor, told Dorothy Day of the Catholic Worker
Movement that he had misgivings about his motives for serving others. She said, "If we were going to forbid hypocrites to work here with us, there'd be no one else to do the work, and no one to do the forbidding!"
Some of my takeaways from this moving and inspiring book follow:
Get in the Boat. "Everyone has something to give. Everyone can do something now. Many people are willing to give is they are presented the opportunity." "Institutions can't and won't save us when we need help. And let's admit it: We all need help sometimes. The corollary is that we all need to help sometimes. That's what gives our lives meaning and significance."
Get Over Yourself. "We can do no great things, only small thins with great love" (Mother Teresa). "Nobody gets to heaven without a letter of reference from the poor" (Jim Wallis in God's Politics). "Sometimes my true vocation lies in putting away the stethoscope -- the badge that tells the world who I am, or at least who I think I am -- and picking up a shovel at a garbage pile in Calcutta." "Serving makes us see ourselves as part of a larger picture." Service starts with whatever is within reach.
Look In Your Hand. Trust that whatever you have at hand will be enough, and dive in. Don't hesitate because of what you don't have...focus on using to best effect what you do have. We are the answers to other peoples' prayers. Think small enough so that you can get started...resources follow action.
Give What You Can. Most people want to help others. What stops them is that they don't think that what they have to offer would be helpful, or they don't know how to help. Remember that everyone can do something...write a letter, hold a hand, relieve suffering in some way, however small. We can all do something, and sometime even nothing is something. Skip a meal and donate what you save...or give the food to another. Give time that is going to waste. Give of the space in your life. To someone, what seems like nothing to you, can be everything.
Think Small. Start where you are...with whatever you have, no matter how small. Every ideology in the world will fail. "everyone needs a sense of purpose in their lives that ascends their daily routines. I believe our purpose is to give of ourselves according to our ability to give, and according to our neighbor's need. That's the only way we can find meaning in our lives on this earth. It's not about making money or acquiring power. It's about serving others. That's what we're here to do. That's my 'ism.'" stop thinking in terms of what you can't do, and start thinking of what you can do, however small it might be. Start where you are.
Be There. Sometimes the people who need us as to be found nearby, and only need something small. Sometimes all they need is for us to be present with them. "...you come to keep them company when it feels like the whole world is falling apart, and your being there says that just for this moment, this one tiny piece of the world is OK..." (Anne Lamott). Often those in need become "invisible" to others, and their most immediate need is to be noticed, acknowledged. As James
Fowler says, in a world that says people only have value if they pull their weight and contribute something of value, what could be more relevant than affirming by word and deed that every person is a loved and valued child of God? Sometimes the right mindset is "Don't just do something, stand there!"
Lose To Win. When things look bleak, serve anyway. Lose yourself in the service of others. "Failure is what you decide it is. Sometimes it is a launching pad to something better. Losses won't always become victories. But they are part of the journey." Chuck Colson says that he maturing of the soul is the object of life...that happens as we serve others.
Love Anyway. If our lives are going to be committed to serving others, inevitably some of those others are going to be enemies. Love them anyway. "Love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you. It's an opportunity, so use the occasion to live the servant life" (Eugene Peterson)." You can make a living (measured by what you get), or you can have a life (measured by what you give). Loving our enemies means we must humanize them. That does not mean unconditional acceptance of bad behavior, but it does mean identifying with their humanity and weaknesses. To effect that change in ourselves, we must turn from looking inward to looking outward...act as if you love, and you will begin to love in reality. Service to others changes the give as well as the receiver, and over time, profoundly so.
Pull Out The Arrow. The immediate need is to relieve the pain, whether physical, emotional, spiritual or anything else. Assessment of guilt, blame, cause, and so forth comes later. Pull out the arrow...and they are sticking out of people all around us, all we have to do is open our eyes and see, and then act. When we leave the responsibility for service to others to institutions like the government or corporations, we lose the opportunity to find meaning and significance in our own lives.