Caring for elderly parents is challenging. It’s a season of life that requires grace and strength that can only come from God. In The Caregiving Season , Jane Daly shares personal caregiving stories, offering practical advice to help you honor your aging parents well and deepen your personal relationship with Christ along the journey.
I'm not in the caregiving season yet, though I've certainly flirted with it during a parent's lingering illnesses. But I'm so glad I read this book now, when I'm not in the midst of the season and can talk with my parents rationally about some of the questions the book raises.
Whether you're in the depths of caregiving for your aging parents or standing on the brink of it, this is a must-read. Jane Daly has written with heart and honesty from her own caregiving situation and challenges each of us to do better in this very difficult season -- by leaning on God, offering grace and humor to our parents, and setting boundaries to save our sanity. Her extensive research provides a wealth of valuable resources to help you navigate the challenges you will face when you're caring for your parents. It's an important book.
I really like this book, and appreciated the honesty of the author. I would like updates as she continues caring for her mother and wonder if eventually her mom will move in with her or move to an assisted living community.
I so agree with this: "Caregiving can be especially guilt producing when the relationship between parent and adult child hasn’t been healthy. 'Relationship baggage typically doesn’t get better with caregiving,' says Taryn Benson, cofounder of Senior Care Solutions. 'Instead of a delight or desire to care for their parent, it becomes a duty. . . . Usually adult children who struggle with this dynamic need to engage other siblings, family, or friends, or seek professional assistance.'"
Reading this book was like sitting down for coffee with the author, Jane, who pours her heart into a meaningful conversation about the reality of caregiving for elderly parents. I loved her writing style, and the way she handled difficult topics with honesty, faith, and conviction. I'm not personally in the caregiving season yet, but when I get closer to it, I'll be reading this book all over again. I'm sure it will be a welcome companion as I navigate some unknown waters.
This book provided a wealth of information! I've already gone thru many of the examples in the book, and now have ideas on how to handle future experiences. I highly recommend this book for anyone with aging parents.
I loved this gentle, sane take on becoming a caregiver. I thought it equal parts loving and honest. It presented issues from the point of view of both caregiver and cared for, and was careful to point out the many blessings to be found amid the sorrow of this season.
As the first book to read about caregiving for an elderly parent, this was good. It covered everything in a quick fluffy sort of way. A good introduction book to the chaos that comes with bringing in an elderly parent. It didn’t really address some of the tough tough stuff. And the examples she gave of her life, just seemed so perfect. One of those, “of just explain yourself and the other person will understand.” But what if they don’t understand, or worse, don’t care?!? What if they become physically abusive? There are so many factors that aren’t addressed here, but hopefully the author didn’t come across these issues. I will definitely be reading more books, but I did like this as a way to dip my toes in. The prayer and Bible focus was helpful too. This book had amazing verses to reference while you are in the thick of it.
Jane Daly realizes how bittersweet caring for our aging parents can be. She expresses this well in the account of experiences she had in caring for her family. The Caregiving Season, Finding Grace to Honor Your Aging Parents offers sound advice, support and consolation for those enduring the same. Her choice of scripture brings encouragement. Having been through this stage of Life I concur that many times our emotions feel like they are on a roller coaster. The Author is sensitive in preparing us for the worst. Jane Daly's book is a true gift for all caregivers. She also shares how to find time to take care of ourselves. I highly recommend. I was honored to read this book for the Tyndale Bloggers in exchange for my thoughts.
I loved this book, and for so many reasons. Jane Daly gives lots of practical advice on caring for your parents in their older age, and includes lots of inspiration and advice on doing so with God's love and grace as your constant guide. As she can attest, keeping it in this perspective makes all the difference. Taking on this huge responsibility on her own was something she knew she couldn't do. Trusting in God to help her and her family through is what made all the difference, and among other things, this book is a great reminder for the rest of us to do the same. Recommended!
If you are just beginning your caregiving journey, or if you're smack-dab in the middle and feel like you're drowning, I hope you'll find help in these pages. After interviewing dozens of Baby Boomers who are caring for their aging parents, it was clear to me that sometimes we just don't know where to turn. This book will help guide you through the turbulent waters of your caregiving season.
I read this when right in the middle of being a 24/7 caregiver to my mum. A chapter a day kept me from running away! Truly! Thank you, Jane. You cover it all. For this I'm so very grateful. I'll probably find myself reading this again, the chapter specific to the scenario, as selfishness tends to be a long-term element in this wintry season.
As part of a reading challenge, I read this book on aging. I'm probably one generation behind the target audience of this book, but I'm really glad I read it now, before a lot of this stuff becomes truly relevant for me.
I loved the tone/perspective of this book. The author is really transparent about the challenges that come with caring for aging parents and I really appreciated her honesty. She shared about resentment and bitterness, trouble among siblings, tough conversations, difficult boundaries and all sorts of situations and the emotions that accompany them. But what I loved was that she always brought it back to what the Bible says and she always encourages the reader to look to Christ as our example and ask God for the grace we need to navigate this season of life. To me, it wasn't preachy at all; it was just gentle reminders that difficult seasons are not excuses to ignore our responsibility to filter everything through God's word...and it's all in the context of someone who is currently walking through this season (her dad died after a semi-quick decline and she's been a caregiver for her mom, in the same townhome complex, for several years at the time this book was written). I have a feeling that anyone in the caregiving season would really be able to relate to much of this book.
She writes, "As caregivers, we're called up to see ourselves as more than our parents' children. We're now their companions. We're their partners in navigating this 'new normal.' How we respond to their needs and their losses requires a full does of grace."
This book is made up of lots of fairly short, easy to digest chapters that are a good mix of personal experience, frank talk about the challenges/emotions, practical advice and quotes from outside sources and spiritual encouragement. Each chapter also has some excellent application questions and possible steps to take to improve/adjust your current situation with your parents. The questions alone make the book worth reading, in my opinion.
The author consistently reinforces the idea that this can be a time in life that bears much fruit—in our relationship with our parents, in our relationship with God (in their relationship with God too) and in our own heart as we will likely be in our parents' place at some point and can learn from going through it with our parents. She writes, "As I've gradually opened my heart to my new role of caretaker, of the 'keeper of the folks,' I've also received a rich reward of God's grace. I've learned that the caregiving season can be a time of spiritual growth for you and your aging loved one. Before you obtain this blessing, however, you can expect to feel growing pains. Remember Jesus' parable about the seed? It must fall to the earth and die before it can produce fruit. Dying to ourselves is painful, but the reward is new and beautiful fruit. And this fruit is my inheritance from my folks. The inheritance is not money; not real estate. it's the intangible blessing of being used by God."
I've had the privilege of watching several people around me care for aging parents/relatives and I'm amazed at the self-sacrifice they've shown. It's not popular in our society to show honor to those who are weak and failing, but each life has value and one of the ways that we can affirm that truth is to lovingly, graciously, faithfully care for those who can't care for themselves. What a blessing to see this lived out. I pray that even now God would prepare me for whatever that looks like with my parents who both lost their parents fairly early on in adulthood. They won't be able to model this season for me, and although I do have memories of them taking care of things when their parents were sick I was too young to really be aware of what it entailed. This book gives me a lot to think about and a good resource to come back to when my parents need more care.
I would recommend this book to people my age (30s) who, Lord willing, are still a ways away from entering into the "caregiving season" for their parents. It was helpful for me to get a preview of the challenges to come so that I can be prepared and possibly start having conversations with my parents before these changes are imminent. Older readers will likely be close to or in this life stage already so I think this book is even more important for them. And even if your parents are gone, reading this book will help you know how to support and encourage those close to you who make be walking this road.
The author writes, "Yes, the caregiving season can be emotionally and physically exhausting, but like all seasons, it doesn't last forever. The leaves will fall; the snow will cover the ground and later melt away, bringing the fresh, new growth of springtime. Decide with God that your caregiving season will end with your own new spiritual growth." This is a realistic, but hopeful book!
An encouragement to "keep on keeping on" during this sometimes difficult season in life. It was kind of like getting together with a friend who has been in the same situation and is there for support. There were several times when I thought, "Good, I'm not the only one who has struggled with that." or "It's nice to know that is normal." as I read. I plan on rereading it anytime I'm weary as a caregiver. I recommend it to any Christian who has older parents. Even if you don't learn anything new, the gentle reminders of how we can serve the Lord in the day-to-day care of Mom and/or Dad were such a blessing.
If you are already a caregiver read the last few chapters first. It has principles and reminders that are very helpful to caregivers.
The first half of the book is for people who think they will need to think about caregiving in their future.
The examples are drawn primarily from the authors family although there are many other examples included. Unfortunately I had a hard time relating to many of the examples because my situation is very different. But I’m sure it will match someone else perfectly.
This is the best of more than a dozen books about caregiving that I've read and used as research. It is encouraging as well as informational. The author shares her own and other stories to illustrate the concepts. It has and will continue to help me as I walk through this season of taking care of both of my 93-year-old parents who live with us. Thank you for blessing and helping me!
Such helpful and honest words that speak to the heart of a caregiver. Assuring to see my emotions about caring for my elderly parent aren’t unusual, and God wants to use this time to grow me as I care for this most important person and His precious child. Tons of great resources noted also!
This book was okay, the subject matter was very interesting and it was nice to hear someone's experience with aging parents, but it wasn't well written and didn't keep my attention. In fact I'm marking this as read because I've given up on reading it. It was a good book to get the conversation started but I'd recommend supplementing this book with others that cover the subject as well.
An extremely valuable book that provides guidance in respectfully caring and understanding our parents in their golden years. I found many parallels in the author’s experiences with her parents that I am experiencing with my mother.
This was a very informative and helpful insight to caring for my mom who has Alzheimer’s and Vascular Dementia. It helped me learn some things that may happen as everyone is different with this illness.
A very insightful look into what can be expected, and how to deal with, a very difficult lifestyle change. I will definitely keep this book handy to refer back to.
What a jewel of a book on this season of life. “ First we are children to our parents, then parents to our children, then parents to our parents, then children to our children.” By MILTON GREENBLATT
This is a very helpful book with practical tips. I plan to re-read and mark for some reminders. Highly recommend to anyone taking care of elderly parents.
"I used to drive, but now I can't. I used to be able to read, but now my eyesight is gone. I can't hear the conversations around me. I feel isolated. I need help getting in and out of the shower. I used to shower whenever I wanted to. Now I have to schedule it around my child's availability. It's too much of a bother." Independence shrinks by degrees, until the senior may give up. Depression can settle in like an uninvited guest.
Jane Daly is the wife of Jim Daly, President of the Focus on the Family organization. This is the beautiful story of a woman who cares for her aging parents. It deals with the challenges this season presents not only with the aging parent, but how it affects your marriage and other relationships.
I loved the way she seeks to show biblical honor to her parents and her wonderful perspective on how this difficult season of life is a gift in so many ways. It is easy to get sucked into feelings of frustration or resentment during the caregiving stage, but the way the author navigates this role is beautifully grace filled as she shares her personal story.
Reading this book has genuinely helped me to maintain a good attitude full of kindness and love for my own aging parents.
I personally found myself not really liking The Caregiving Season. I originally got it with the intention of giving it to my mother who has elderly parents that she cares for. However after reading the book I got the feeling that it would only make her feel guilty for not doing more even though she already does as much as she can. I think the book should have given more thought to the caregiver instead of just the elderly parent.
***Disclosure: I was sent this product for free for test and review purposes for only my honest and unbiased review; I was given no payment or any form of compensation for this review. These views are 100% my own and were not influenced by anything, but the product itself.I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.