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Die Psychologie des Gelingens
Wie oft werden wir im Alltag aufgefordert, optimistisch zu sein und positiv zu denken. Es komme nur darauf an, unsere Ziele mit höchster Konzentration anzugehen, dann würden sich die Ergebnisse wie von selbst einstellen. Die Psychologin Gabriele Oettingen weist nach, dass diese Gleichung nicht aufgeht. Ihr Konzept präsentiert einen überraschend neuen Ansatz der Selbstmotivation, dessen Wirksamkeit in zahllosen Untersuchungen bestätigt wurde: Sobald die Menschen nicht nur positiv denken, sondern auch Hindernisse in ihren Planungen berücksichtigen, gelingt es ihnen besser, ihre individuellen Ziele zu erreichen.
272 pages, Hardcover
First published October 16, 2014
364 people are currently reading
5599 people want to read
About the author
Gabriele Oettingen
4 books71 followersGabriele Oettingen is a Professor of Psychology at New York University and the University of Hamburg. Her research focuses on how people think about the future, and how this impacts cognition, emotion, and behavior.
Oettingen studied biology in Munich and subsequently worked at the Max Planck Institute for Behavioral Physiology in Seewiesen, Germany, and at the Medical Research Council, Unit on the Development and Integration of Behaviour, Madingley, Cambridge, England. Simultaneously she did her PhD at the Ludwig Maximilian University of Munich. She was funded by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation to conduct research at the University of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, USA. She worked at the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Berlin while also gaining a Dr. habil. degree in psychology at the Free University Berlin. She accepted a professor of psychology position at University of Hamburg in 2000, and since 2002 is a professor of psychology at New York University. She lives in New York City and in Hamburg, Germany.
Oettingen studied biology in Munich and subsequently worked at the Max Planck Institute for Behavioral Physiology in Seewiesen, Germany, and at the Medical Research Council, Unit on the Development and Integration of Behaviour, Madingley, Cambridge, England. Simultaneously she did her PhD at the Ludwig Maximilian University of Munich. She was funded by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation to conduct research at the University of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia, USA. She worked at the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Berlin while also gaining a Dr. habil. degree in psychology at the Free University Berlin. She accepted a professor of psychology position at University of Hamburg in 2000, and since 2002 is a professor of psychology at New York University. She lives in New York City and in Hamburg, Germany.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 210 reviews
October 6, 2024
Review Update:
A lot of people find this book helpful. And I would feel really bad if someone who would otherwise benefit from this book did not read it based on my negative review.
As I try to make clear in this review. My issues with the book are mostly stylistic. And the review was intended to be humorous.
I (personally) didn't like the book. But it appears to be useful for a lot of other people. So please don't let my rant prevent you from reading it.
Original Review:
Once in a while a book comes along that makes you want to stop reading books. This one was one of those for me. It wasn't horrible. It was o.k. But something about it drained me of my will to live.
Honestly, I can't entirely blame the book. I think it may be my annual bout of seasonal affective disorder doing the talking, or perhaps tax season has me feeling down, or global warming, or some other completely unrelated thing.
I know I sound like I'm trying to let someone down easy. It's not you it's me. But I'm honestly willing to entertain that possibly. At any rate, as should be readily apparent by this point, I didn't really dig the experience of reading this book, and to be honest, I'm not altogether certain why.
The author. Dr. Gabriele Oettingen seems like a nice enough person. She's a psychology professor at New York University and the University of Hamburg. That's pretty cool right?
Her idea is pretty cool too. She wanted to know if positive thinking had any kind of beneficial effects on motivation and accomplishment.
Her initial research found that positive thinking can actually have a kind of ironic rebound effect, where you become less motivated and less likely to take action. That's pretty neat too right?
After a bunch more studies, she came up with a little life hack that she calls Mental Contrasting that might be a better way to go if you actually want to achieve your desired future.
Mental Contrasting involves first positively fantasizing about your desired future (e.g., lose 20 pounds) and then mentally elaborating on the obstacles that stand in the way (e.g., love of cake).
Apparently imagining the future and then imagining real-life obstacles highlights the fact that.... wait for it..... in order to realize the wished for future one has to actually overcome the obstacles that stand in the way (e.g., to lose weight I have to quit eating so much fuckin cake).
I guess that focusing on the obstacles and the goal helps people set realistic goals or something. Who knew right?
She boils the whole thing down to a really actually painful little anagram - WOOP - which stands for: wish, outcome, obstacle, plan.
WOOP.
O.k. I think I just figured out what at least one of my problems with this book is. She says WOOP like 10,000 times. I'm sort of gaging as I write this. I guess it really bothered me. Wow, good to know.
The other thing that bothered me is that I don't feel like I learned anything.
So let me get this straight. You wish for something, you think about the outcome, you imagine the obstacles and then you make a plan. Doesn't every one already do this?
If you didn't already do this, I could see how adopting this strategy would be helpful. But dangalang, who doesn't already do this?
Anyway. Other people seemed to like the book. So again, maybe it's just me.
A lot of people find this book helpful. And I would feel really bad if someone who would otherwise benefit from this book did not read it based on my negative review.
As I try to make clear in this review. My issues with the book are mostly stylistic. And the review was intended to be humorous.
I (personally) didn't like the book. But it appears to be useful for a lot of other people. So please don't let my rant prevent you from reading it.
Original Review:
Once in a while a book comes along that makes you want to stop reading books. This one was one of those for me. It wasn't horrible. It was o.k. But something about it drained me of my will to live.
Honestly, I can't entirely blame the book. I think it may be my annual bout of seasonal affective disorder doing the talking, or perhaps tax season has me feeling down, or global warming, or some other completely unrelated thing.
I know I sound like I'm trying to let someone down easy. It's not you it's me. But I'm honestly willing to entertain that possibly. At any rate, as should be readily apparent by this point, I didn't really dig the experience of reading this book, and to be honest, I'm not altogether certain why.
The author. Dr. Gabriele Oettingen seems like a nice enough person. She's a psychology professor at New York University and the University of Hamburg. That's pretty cool right?
Her idea is pretty cool too. She wanted to know if positive thinking had any kind of beneficial effects on motivation and accomplishment.
Her initial research found that positive thinking can actually have a kind of ironic rebound effect, where you become less motivated and less likely to take action. That's pretty neat too right?
After a bunch more studies, she came up with a little life hack that she calls Mental Contrasting that might be a better way to go if you actually want to achieve your desired future.
Mental Contrasting involves first positively fantasizing about your desired future (e.g., lose 20 pounds) and then mentally elaborating on the obstacles that stand in the way (e.g., love of cake).
Apparently imagining the future and then imagining real-life obstacles highlights the fact that.... wait for it..... in order to realize the wished for future one has to actually overcome the obstacles that stand in the way (e.g., to lose weight I have to quit eating so much fuckin cake).
I guess that focusing on the obstacles and the goal helps people set realistic goals or something. Who knew right?
She boils the whole thing down to a really actually painful little anagram - WOOP - which stands for: wish, outcome, obstacle, plan.
WOOP.
O.k. I think I just figured out what at least one of my problems with this book is. She says WOOP like 10,000 times. I'm sort of gaging as I write this. I guess it really bothered me. Wow, good to know.
The other thing that bothered me is that I don't feel like I learned anything.
So let me get this straight. You wish for something, you think about the outcome, you imagine the obstacles and then you make a plan. Doesn't every one already do this?
If you didn't already do this, I could see how adopting this strategy would be helpful. But dangalang, who doesn't already do this?
Anyway. Other people seemed to like the book. So again, maybe it's just me.
March 8, 2015
Previous review (update below):
It gets five stars because the book presents a useful and unique technique for thinking about challenges and thinking about goals. I've been experimenting with the technique for about a week now with promising results. Highly recommended to people who are striving to achieve goals in their lives.
Updated review:
I have now been using the mental contrasting/WOOP technique that is presented in this book for more than four months. It has been very helpful and I now use it every day at least once. I believe this is a revolutionary technique which may take awhile to become known because it is so unique.
Note about many of the less positive reviews here on GoodReads: It seems that many of them are from readers who were sent a copy as part of some book previewing program. From their reviews it looks like they were seeking entertainment or a literature experience. This book is phenomenal for those who are looking for tools to fire up their goal achievements. It is not entertainment, nor is it "literature." If someone is not actively looking for improved tools to think about, and implement, goals, then they are not likely to enjoy reading through chapters about research and science. I do not think these people are the intended audience and it is too bad they were even sent books in the first place. A bad decision on the publisher's part probably.
It gets five stars because the book presents a useful and unique technique for thinking about challenges and thinking about goals. I've been experimenting with the technique for about a week now with promising results. Highly recommended to people who are striving to achieve goals in their lives.
Updated review:
I have now been using the mental contrasting/WOOP technique that is presented in this book for more than four months. It has been very helpful and I now use it every day at least once. I believe this is a revolutionary technique which may take awhile to become known because it is so unique.
Note about many of the less positive reviews here on GoodReads: It seems that many of them are from readers who were sent a copy as part of some book previewing program. From their reviews it looks like they were seeking entertainment or a literature experience. This book is phenomenal for those who are looking for tools to fire up their goal achievements. It is not entertainment, nor is it "literature." If someone is not actively looking for improved tools to think about, and implement, goals, then they are not likely to enjoy reading through chapters about research and science. I do not think these people are the intended audience and it is too bad they were even sent books in the first place. A bad decision on the publisher's part probably.
September 2, 2015
Don't get fooled by the bad reviews, most of those are from people that got the book from a giveaway so they didn't have a desire or motive to buy it.
I give 5 stars to this because of its clear view of how positive thinking works if you want to use it, by exploiting the brain's ability for mental contrasting. It's not only about having desires, setting goals or thinking about how to achieve, it's the specific process that works. I see (from the reviews) that many people have missed that.
Sure, the book could be better written, however this does not affect its value. Many people get impressed by "The Secret" and numerous other similar books on "The Law of Attraction" or whatever the universe does to help you get and achieve, but not many books give proven techniques to do so and this is one of them, a good one indeed.
Get the book, try the process (it's very easy, actually, just needs some discipline) and then you can write your review here for other people to see :)
I give 5 stars to this because of its clear view of how positive thinking works if you want to use it, by exploiting the brain's ability for mental contrasting. It's not only about having desires, setting goals or thinking about how to achieve, it's the specific process that works. I see (from the reviews) that many people have missed that.
Sure, the book could be better written, however this does not affect its value. Many people get impressed by "The Secret" and numerous other similar books on "The Law of Attraction" or whatever the universe does to help you get and achieve, but not many books give proven techniques to do so and this is one of them, a good one indeed.
Get the book, try the process (it's very easy, actually, just needs some discipline) and then you can write your review here for other people to see :)
August 4, 2023
عنوان خیلی دقیق نیست. محتوای کتاب بیشتر نقد رویاسازی و جملات و فلسفه انگیزشی داغ این روزهاست نه اساسا فکر مثبت. با مثال های مختلف و آمار هم این مسئله رو باز کرده و صدمات ناشی از اونها رو به بحث میگذاره اما درمورد تفکر مثبت یا منفی حرف خاصی نمیزنه
September 10, 2020
Wish: To finish this book
Outcome: I will know more about the fallacies of positive thinking.
Obstacle: When a book is long-winded at times due to numerous discussions of research results, I tend to want to mark the book as read and refer to information on the internet.
Plan: If a book is long-winded at times, I will listen to the audiobook at 2x speed.
Voila! I think I've got it.
Outcome: I will know more about the fallacies of positive thinking.
Obstacle: When a book is long-winded at times due to numerous discussions of research results, I tend to want to mark the book as read and refer to information on the internet.
Plan: If a book is long-winded at times, I will listen to the audiobook at 2x speed.
Voila! I think I've got it.
June 3, 2022
مثبت فکر نکنید. این کتاب برای من که کلا آدم شکاندیشی هستم و به این ماجرای مثبتاندیشی به هزارویک دلیل شک دارم، کتاب مفیدی بود. کتاب خیلی اصولی کتابها و نگرشهای مثبتاندیشی رو نقد میکنه و در آخر به راهکارهایی میپردازه که برای رسیدن به آرزوهامون میشه منطقی فکر کرد و عاقلانه جلو رفت نه با رویا پردازیهای بیاساس. تکنیک ووپ تکنیکیه که به ما یاد میده چه جوری برای خواستههامون برنامهای ساده بریزیم و ازش استفاده کنیم تا بهشون برسیم. تکنیکی که منطقی و آسونه. بدون بلندپروازیهای عجیب مثبتاندیشی ها. من قبل از این کتاب، کتابهای راز، معجزه شکرگزاری، چشم دل بگشا، چهار اثر از فلورانس اسکاول شین و چند کتاب دیگه از این دست رو به دقت خونده بودم. نه برای اینکه باور داشتم با خیالپردازی میشه به رویاها رسید. برای اینکه میخواستم راه منطقی این میانبرها رو پیدا کنم و نمیکردم. در نهایت به نظرم این کتاب خیلی کمکم کرد. اگر مثل من به بررسی علمی و روانشناسانه مثبتاندیشی علاقه دارید، این کتاب رو حتما بهتون توصیه میکنم. اگر هم فکر میکنید قانون راز راه نجاته، در کنارش این کتاب هم بخونید تا به یه تعادلی برسید. جا داره بگم از بین کتابهای مثبتاندیشی زرد، کتابی که تا حدودی برام ارزش خوندن داشت، کتاب معجزه شکرگزاری بود. نه اون شکرگزاری اغراقآمیز و چشمپوشی از مشکلها، اما شکر کردن چیزهایی که داریم، حس خوبی به ما القا میکنه و دید ما رو باز تر میکنه فقط در این حد نه بیشتر. خلاصه که به نظرم تمام این کتابها رو بخونید تا خودتون به نتیجه برسید راه درست کدومه.
September 19, 2025
دارم کم کم از کتاب های انگیزشی خسته میشم. تفریبا یه چیز رو اکثر این کتاب ها تکرار میکنن.
Read
November 2, 2020خوب بسی خوشحالم که من اولین رویو فارسی رو برای این کتاب دارم مینویسم! B-)
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ببینین، این کتاب یک جورایی در نقد اون کتاب و مستند "راز"هستش که میگفت "با صرف مثبت اندیشی و فکرکردن تنها به اهداف زندگیتون میتونین بهشون برسین."
الان که فکرشو میکنم، اون مستند هیچ پایه ی علمی نداشت وبیشتر چیزهایی بود که دوست داشتیم بشنویم. معلومه که همه به جای در نظر گرفتن جوانب هدف و برنامه ریزی براش ترجیح میدن بشینن و راجع بهش خیالبافی کنن!
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حالا این بنده خدا چی میگه؟
میاد 4 تا روش فکری مختلف رو در نظر میگیره:
1-خیالبافی در رابطه با تحقق موفقیت آمیز رویاها (زیاده روی)
2- فکر کردن به واقعیت های سد راه موفقیت (رها نکردن واقعیت)
3- ابتدا خیالبافی منفی و بعد فکر های مثبت (مقابله معکوس)
4-فکر های مثبت و بعد اندیشیدن به جوانب سدراه یا منفی (مقابله ی ذهنی)
طی بیشتر از 20 سال تحقیق روی گروه های سنی، اهداف، تحصیلات و ملیت های مختلف، به این نتیجه رسیده که روش "مقابله ی ذهنی" بیشترین احتمال موفقیت رو در برابر سه روش دیگه ای که در برابرش استفاده کردن داشته. یک نکته ی جالب اینه که هرچقدر فرد قبل از شروع کردن کار، احتمال موفقیت کار رو بیشتر ارزیابی کنه، این روش موثر تره.
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در فصل های آخر میاد یک الگوریتم فکری پیشنهاد میده برای وقت هایی که به یک هدف چه کوچیک و چه بزرگ فکر میکنیم. تنها شرط استفاده از این روش اینه که هدف ما منطقی و قابل دستیابی باشه. این الگوریتم از این قراره:
1-wish 2-Outcome 3-Obstacle 4- Plan (WOOP)
همونطور که مشخصه اول به اون هدف یا آرزو فکر میکنین. بعد اون احساسات و نتایج مثبتی که رسیدن به اون هدف براتون داره. بعدش به موانعی که سد راه رسیدن شما به اون هدف میشن. این دلایل ممکنه درونی یا بیرونی باشن فرقی نداره. بعد از اون با خودتون میگین اوکی اگه با این مشکل روبه رو شدم، فلان کار رو میکنم.
چیزی که مهمه اینه که حتما روند تفکراتتون حتما به همین ترتیب باشه و اون مرحله ی آخر به صورت "اگر... آنگاه بیان" بشه.
نکته ی باحال: برعکس روش مقابله ی ذهنی صرف، اینجا موثر بودن الگوریتم، تابعی از احتمال موفقیت نیست. یعنی همون کسی که در اول فکرشو نمیکرده زیاد موفق بشه، میتونه عملکرد مسا��ی داشته باشه با اون کسی که در ابتدا اطمینان زیادی به خودش داشته.
.
ببینین، این کتاب یک جورایی در نقد اون کتاب و مستند "راز"هستش که میگفت "با صرف مثبت اندیشی و فکرکردن تنها به اهداف زندگیتون میتونین بهشون برسین."
الان که فکرشو میکنم، اون مستند هیچ پایه ی علمی نداشت وبیشتر چیزهایی بود که دوست داشتیم بشنویم. معلومه که همه به جای در نظر گرفتن جوانب هدف و برنامه ریزی براش ترجیح میدن بشینن و راجع بهش خیالبافی کنن!
.
حالا این بنده خدا چی میگه؟
میاد 4 تا روش فکری مختلف رو در نظر میگیره:
1-خیالبافی در رابطه با تحقق موفقیت آمیز رویاها (زیاده روی)
2- فکر کردن به واقعیت های سد راه موفقیت (رها نکردن واقعیت)
3- ابتدا خیالبافی منفی و بعد فکر های مثبت (مقابله معکوس)
4-فکر های مثبت و بعد اندیشیدن به جوانب سدراه یا منفی (مقابله ی ذهنی)
طی بیشتر از 20 سال تحقیق روی گروه های سنی، اهداف، تحصیلات و ملیت های مختلف، به این نتیجه رسیده که روش "مقابله ی ذهنی" بیشترین احتمال موفقیت رو در برابر سه روش دیگه ای که در برابرش استفاده کردن داشته. یک نکته ی جالب اینه که هرچقدر فرد قبل از شروع کردن کار، احتمال موفقیت کار رو بیشتر ارزیابی کنه، این روش موثر تره.
.
در فصل های آخر میاد یک الگوریتم فکری پیشنهاد میده برای وقت هایی که به یک هدف چه کوچیک و چه بزرگ فکر میکنیم. تنها شرط استفاده از این روش اینه که هدف ما منطقی و قابل دستیابی باشه. این الگوریتم از این قراره:
1-wish 2-Outcome 3-Obstacle 4- Plan (WOOP)
همونطور که مشخصه اول به اون هدف یا آرزو فکر میکنین. بعد اون احساسات و نتایج مثبتی که رسیدن به اون هدف براتون داره. بعدش به موانعی که سد راه رسیدن شما به اون هدف میشن. این دلایل ممکنه درونی یا بیرونی باشن فرقی نداره. بعد از اون با خودتون میگین اوکی اگه با این مشکل روبه رو شدم، فلان کار رو میکنم.
چیزی که مهمه اینه که حتما روند تفکراتتون حتما به همین ترتیب باشه و اون مرحله ی آخر به صورت "اگر... آنگاه بیان" بشه.
نکته ی باحال: برعکس روش مقابله ی ذهنی صرف، اینجا موثر بودن الگوریتم، تابعی از احتمال موفقیت نیست. یعنی همون کسی که در اول فکرشو نمیکرده زیاد موفق بشه، میتونه عملکرد مسا��ی داشته باشه با اون کسی که در ابتدا اطمینان زیادی به خودش داشته.
November 24, 2015
Books like The Secret make me cringe big time. I am very much an optimist but positive thinking is not the best strategy in life. It doesn't work because you have to constantly think about it. And according to the research Oettingen presents in this book, positive thinking can often hinder a person, instead of motivate him/her to take positive action in achieving their wishes. In fact, multiple scientific studies prove this.
Oettingen gives you an alternative mental tool called WOOP (which stands for wish, outcome, obstacle, plan) to help you achieve your goals. By identifying your wish, outcome and the inner obstacles that stand on the way of these desires, you can then create an action plan to achieve your wishes.
I immediately tested out WOOP and what I love about it is that it forces you to dive in deeper inside yourself to identify your true internal obstacles, granted that you're 100% honest with yourself. For example, I identified feeling lazy as one of my obstacles to achieve a certain desired wish and outcome. It's the urge of not wanting to push myself to think or to take action because of wanting to rebel against structure. So, what we're really talking here is feeling bored. The plan then is to get out of my comfort zone whenever I feel lazy. What I really need to rebel against is falling into a rigid routine that bores me, not the work itself - it's the approach.
I enjoyed this book a lot and will be using WOOP as a tool on a regular basis. Highly recommended!
Oettingen gives you an alternative mental tool called WOOP (which stands for wish, outcome, obstacle, plan) to help you achieve your goals. By identifying your wish, outcome and the inner obstacles that stand on the way of these desires, you can then create an action plan to achieve your wishes.
I immediately tested out WOOP and what I love about it is that it forces you to dive in deeper inside yourself to identify your true internal obstacles, granted that you're 100% honest with yourself. For example, I identified feeling lazy as one of my obstacles to achieve a certain desired wish and outcome. It's the urge of not wanting to push myself to think or to take action because of wanting to rebel against structure. So, what we're really talking here is feeling bored. The plan then is to get out of my comfort zone whenever I feel lazy. What I really need to rebel against is falling into a rigid routine that bores me, not the work itself - it's the approach.
I enjoyed this book a lot and will be using WOOP as a tool on a regular basis. Highly recommended!
January 14, 2015
Way too many research examples in this book. After muddling through the research background, examples and results, the main points of book come at the very end. Main points could be summed up in a couple pages and are rather common sense. Psychology research students might find this book interesting; I just found it long and drawn out. (I'd like to know who funded the years of research. Maybe the author should get kudos for securing so many years of research funding.)
October 11, 2014
This was a Goodreads giveaway.
I read through the book--not page by page, word by word, but some chapters in their entirety.
It is an advance copy, so there are a lot of typographical errors. Some of them are hard to ignore. For example, the word "obstacle" is written, on every single chart/diagram/graph, as "obsticle". For a research-based text, that's hard to just overlook.
In general, though, I like the suggestions given. Essentially, if we want to reach our goals or achieve our dreams and wishes, we have to be realistic. It's not enough to be optimistic. I can be positive about losing weight, visualize myself as a supermodel, tell myself "You can do it!"--all while sitting on the couch eating bonbons. I'll never reach that goal, no matter how upbeat I am about it.
Instead, the author suggests a "WOOP" strategy. First, clearly identifying your goal--the W=wish.
Next, clarify the O=outcome. What do you hope to achieve by reaching your wish? The second O=obstacles (or obsticles, as the case may be). What might be getting in your way? The key here is to be realistic, and identify the obstacles ahead of time. When you hit them, as you most certainly will, you'll be prepared for them. Which takes us to the P=Prevent/overcome/seize opportunity.
Oettingen suggests 15-20 minute visualization activities to work through the process, and to actually write the WOOP plan down, so it is tangible.
This portion of the book, and her examples of successes using the strategy, were interesting. I know that I am guilty of negative self-talk; rather than thinking about how I can get past something, I focus on the "I can't."
I read through the book--not page by page, word by word, but some chapters in their entirety.
It is an advance copy, so there are a lot of typographical errors. Some of them are hard to ignore. For example, the word "obstacle" is written, on every single chart/diagram/graph, as "obsticle". For a research-based text, that's hard to just overlook.
In general, though, I like the suggestions given. Essentially, if we want to reach our goals or achieve our dreams and wishes, we have to be realistic. It's not enough to be optimistic. I can be positive about losing weight, visualize myself as a supermodel, tell myself "You can do it!"--all while sitting on the couch eating bonbons. I'll never reach that goal, no matter how upbeat I am about it.
Instead, the author suggests a "WOOP" strategy. First, clearly identifying your goal--the W=wish.
Next, clarify the O=outcome. What do you hope to achieve by reaching your wish? The second O=obstacles (or obsticles, as the case may be). What might be getting in your way? The key here is to be realistic, and identify the obstacles ahead of time. When you hit them, as you most certainly will, you'll be prepared for them. Which takes us to the P=Prevent/overcome/seize opportunity.
Oettingen suggests 15-20 minute visualization activities to work through the process, and to actually write the WOOP plan down, so it is tangible.
This portion of the book, and her examples of successes using the strategy, were interesting. I know that I am guilty of negative self-talk; rather than thinking about how I can get past something, I focus on the "I can't."
August 3, 2018
The book is useful and to the point, but I didn’t like the audiobook performance at all. The voice and tone suited a toothpaste ad much better than a psychological study refuting the claims about the marvels of positive thinking and proposing a sensible technique instead. So I recommend you read the book instead of listening to the audiobook.
February 4, 2015
Could have been condensed into 3 chapters, but the takeaway was a good one: focus on your obstacles and you'll overcome them.
May 6, 2023
اگر مثل من آدمی با تفکرانتقادی مادرزاد هستید خیلی به کارتان نمی آید چون نقد اصلی کتاب بر رواج "رویاپردازی" درباره آینده است که در صنعت انگیزش و صنعت سینما و صنایع دیگر جهان سرمایه داری به شدت تبلیغ میشود.
کتاب با آمار و ارقام ثابت میکند بیشتر آدمها از این رویاپردازی صدمه میخورند
نقد اصلی من بر کتاب این است که عنوان چیزی غیر از محتوا را میگوید. عنوان باید این میبود: رویاپردازی نکنید! یا حتی درباره آینده خیالبافی نکنید!
این تنها دو نمونه از جملات کتاب:
"آرمانی سازی آینده تدبیری نیست که بتواند انگیزه افراد را حفظ کند و آنها را به هدفشان برساند و به نظر نمیرسد که برای جامعه کارگر باشد. عاقلانه نیست که غرق در رویاپردازی درباره دستیابی به اهداف تان شوید و خیال کنید به خوبی و خوشی در مسیر موفقیت هستید. زندگی طور دیگری عمل میکند."
"اگر کسی هدفی در زندگی نداشته باشد و خیال پردازی کند که روزی نقش اول فیلمی را به دست خواهد آورد، افراط در خیال بافی های مثبت احتمالا مانعی در مسیرش خواهد بود. در حالت عادی باید دست کم چند ماه و حتی چند سال هر روز در آزمون انتخاب نقش شرکت کرد."
مفهوم فکر اصلا در این کتاب مد نظر نیست و مدام اسم رویا و خیال مطرح میشود. بنابراین من هرچه پیش رفتم بیشتر سرخورده شدم از اینکه کتاب هیچ وجه فلسفی ندارد. آیا روانشناسی باید همیشه دامنش را از آلودگی به فلسفه پاک نگهدارد؟ هرگز! تا جایی که من خوانده ام درخشان ترین روانشناسهای معاصر مثل "یالوم" و از او مهمتر "رولو می" آبشخور اصلی اندیشه شان فلسفه است
به هر حال حرف اصلی کتاب این است که اگر از رویاپردازی درباره آینده رهایی ندارید به روش "مقابله ذهنی" جلوی رویاهای غیرواقعی تان را بگیرید و موانع را هم در رویایتان بگنجانید. با اضافه شدن این دو مرحله یک روش چهار مرحله ای به نام woop شکل میگیرد که برای نتیجه گرفتن از آن باید مدام تجربه اش کنید اما نویسنده مدعی است معجزه میکند و من هم این را رد نمیکنم. حتی خودم هم اپلیکیشن ووپ را روی گوشی ام نصب کردم.
اتفاقا این بهترین بخش کتاب است. جایی که واقعا باید با ایده نویسنده و تحقیقاتش همراه بشوید تا نتیجه بگیرید. مخصوصا اگر دچار مشکلات مستمر، نگرانی و سردرگمی برای حل مشکلی قدیمی هستید به گمان من حتما ارزش دارد تجربه اش کنید.
کتاب با آمار و ارقام ثابت میکند بیشتر آدمها از این رویاپردازی صدمه میخورند
نقد اصلی من بر کتاب این است که عنوان چیزی غیر از محتوا را میگوید. عنوان باید این میبود: رویاپردازی نکنید! یا حتی درباره آینده خیالبافی نکنید!
این تنها دو نمونه از جملات کتاب:
"آرمانی سازی آینده تدبیری نیست که بتواند انگیزه افراد را حفظ کند و آنها را به هدفشان برساند و به نظر نمیرسد که برای جامعه کارگر باشد. عاقلانه نیست که غرق در رویاپردازی درباره دستیابی به اهداف تان شوید و خیال کنید به خوبی و خوشی در مسیر موفقیت هستید. زندگی طور دیگری عمل میکند."
"اگر کسی هدفی در زندگی نداشته باشد و خیال پردازی کند که روزی نقش اول فیلمی را به دست خواهد آورد، افراط در خیال بافی های مثبت احتمالا مانعی در مسیرش خواهد بود. در حالت عادی باید دست کم چند ماه و حتی چند سال هر روز در آزمون انتخاب نقش شرکت کرد."
مفهوم فکر اصلا در این کتاب مد نظر نیست و مدام اسم رویا و خیال مطرح میشود. بنابراین من هرچه پیش رفتم بیشتر سرخورده شدم از اینکه کتاب هیچ وجه فلسفی ندارد. آیا روانشناسی باید همیشه دامنش را از آلودگی به فلسفه پاک نگهدارد؟ هرگز! تا جایی که من خوانده ام درخشان ترین روانشناسهای معاصر مثل "یالوم" و از او مهمتر "رولو می" آبشخور اصلی اندیشه شان فلسفه است
به هر حال حرف اصلی کتاب این است که اگر از رویاپردازی درباره آینده رهایی ندارید به روش "مقابله ذهنی" جلوی رویاهای غیرواقعی تان را بگیرید و موانع را هم در رویایتان بگنجانید. با اضافه شدن این دو مرحله یک روش چهار مرحله ای به نام woop شکل میگیرد که برای نتیجه گرفتن از آن باید مدام تجربه اش کنید اما نویسنده مدعی است معجزه میکند و من هم این را رد نمیکنم. حتی خودم هم اپلیکیشن ووپ را روی گوشی ام نصب کردم.
اتفاقا این بهترین بخش کتاب است. جایی که واقعا باید با ایده نویسنده و تحقیقاتش همراه بشوید تا نتیجه بگیرید. مخصوصا اگر دچار مشکلات مستمر، نگرانی و سردرگمی برای حل مشکلی قدیمی هستید به گمان من حتما ارزش دارد تجربه اش کنید.
September 3, 2015
This was a good examination of the 'positive thinking' mindset and it turns around everything you think you know. Research shows that positive thinking isn't the motivational tool you thought it was. Oettingen builds the case that unfettered positive thinking is counterproductive - making you less likely to complete the task. She build a case for WOOP - an acronym that stands for Wish - Outcome - Obstacle - Plan. By examining what you desire, what stands in your way, and how you can effectively overcome the obstacle, you can power up your motivation and ability to accomplish almost any desire, be it weight loss, money issues, or a work problem. I'll be attempting this technique and hoping to increase my results at work and home.
October 10, 2017
Great info, but a bit repetitive. 5 star content, 3 star writing.
July 19, 2020
I truly appreciate Gabriele sharing her lifetime work. This book came out of her cultural shock with American optimism, which makes it that much more entertaining to read. She starts off explaining the difference between positive fantasy and realistic thinking. Findings that having positive fantasy literally reduce blood pressure was absolutely mindblowing.
Positive fantasy helps us persevere in a difficult time and calms ourselves. It also helps us realize our potential and what we truly want (daydreaming at your meeting means you want to get out of there). Realistic thinking makes you execute at the same time you'd feel guilty of the existing situation. Realistic thinking helps you achieve less if you visualize yourself not achieving it. That's why when you want to check out how much you can achieve (Wish), accept positive feedback and filter negativity to unlimit your creative thinking.
Her proposed solution to implement this practical thinking is WOOP. Coming up with the obstacle and plan at the emotional level is harder that what she's made it sound. In fact, I tried this technique before reading this book (I heard it on YouTube). What levels of detail to include was difficult to tell. In the book, she said you'll get to the core emotional issue by asking the why 3 times. And yes, it has to be emotional. If my potential obstacle is not having enough time, it will be because of my friend distracting me. If that's the case, it's my fault for not being assertive to tell him to wait. This technique apparently works at more unconscious level than the STAMP goal setting technique, therefore more powerful and works in a long term. Or at least, they can work in combination. If WOOP sounds too tedious, coming up with just 4 positive and 4 negative attributes for success/failure should work as well.
The book overall is very advanced. Analyzing your own emotion and activity already takes tremendous self-awareness skills and some psychology backgrounds. Each of the concepts she goes through is a book worth of materials on its own. But I've incorporated WOOP in my daily Todo list for about a week. And yes. It has been very effective. I just feel much more guilty for not accomplishing those tasks at the end of the day. I guess by going through this exercise, the daily tasks become internalized and therefore appeal to my intrinsic motivation. Even though it means it takes 20 minutes longer to make up the list, it's certainly worth it.
Now I'm curious if this WOOP technique also works at an organizational level collectively. I've learned how to write a business plan numerous times. That is all about setting a goal in number and deadline. Nothing in the scene teaches you to write out the potential obstacles. This mental exercise certainly makes the plan more realistic and well thought out.
Positive fantasy helps us persevere in a difficult time and calms ourselves. It also helps us realize our potential and what we truly want (daydreaming at your meeting means you want to get out of there). Realistic thinking makes you execute at the same time you'd feel guilty of the existing situation. Realistic thinking helps you achieve less if you visualize yourself not achieving it. That's why when you want to check out how much you can achieve (Wish), accept positive feedback and filter negativity to unlimit your creative thinking.
Her proposed solution to implement this practical thinking is WOOP. Coming up with the obstacle and plan at the emotional level is harder that what she's made it sound. In fact, I tried this technique before reading this book (I heard it on YouTube). What levels of detail to include was difficult to tell. In the book, she said you'll get to the core emotional issue by asking the why 3 times. And yes, it has to be emotional. If my potential obstacle is not having enough time, it will be because of my friend distracting me. If that's the case, it's my fault for not being assertive to tell him to wait. This technique apparently works at more unconscious level than the STAMP goal setting technique, therefore more powerful and works in a long term. Or at least, they can work in combination. If WOOP sounds too tedious, coming up with just 4 positive and 4 negative attributes for success/failure should work as well.
The book overall is very advanced. Analyzing your own emotion and activity already takes tremendous self-awareness skills and some psychology backgrounds. Each of the concepts she goes through is a book worth of materials on its own. But I've incorporated WOOP in my daily Todo list for about a week. And yes. It has been very effective. I just feel much more guilty for not accomplishing those tasks at the end of the day. I guess by going through this exercise, the daily tasks become internalized and therefore appeal to my intrinsic motivation. Even though it means it takes 20 minutes longer to make up the list, it's certainly worth it.
Now I'm curious if this WOOP technique also works at an organizational level collectively. I've learned how to write a business plan numerous times. That is all about setting a goal in number and deadline. Nothing in the scene teaches you to write out the potential obstacles. This mental exercise certainly makes the plan more realistic and well thought out.
March 17, 2015
"You'll never find rainbows if you're looking down."
~ Dwight D. Eisenhower
"Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation" is an an engaging interesting psychological expose authored by psychologist/researcher Gabriele Oettingen PhD. Oettingen is the professor of psychology at New York University and the University of Hamburg.
With the global economic downturn of 2009, it isn't surprising that the studies in positive psychology have noticeably increased. Oettingen's research/studies have occurred over 20 years in both Germany and the US. Those interviewed have included college students, athletes, the unemployed, medical/therapy patients, people in recovery, children, others from all walks of life.
In 2008, the Pepsi Optimism Project noted in spite the recession, that 94% of people surveyed felt optimistic, an important ideal worldwide. 90% said it was necessary to move society forward. By 2013 American opinion had shifted, a Gallup Poll (2013) found that only 69% were optimistic about future prospects.
Oettingen observes while it is helpful and advantageous to have a positive outlook, especially for short term mental well being, the reality of any given situation determines the outcome; possibly undermining the best efforts to use positive psychology/thinking. For example, therapists use visualization or meditation techniques to relieve stress, or immediate relief of a problem. Optimism is used to sell products as consumers "visualize" their next car, vacation, piece of clothing, etc. Another person may focus on winning the lottery. The downside is over time, positive thinking may become distracting, unrealistic, or delusional leading to a host of other problems including anxiety/depression. This is may occur if a desired outcome wish or goal doesn't happen or materialize.
Oettingen combines two psychological techniques she identifies as "mental contrasting" associated with motivation, self-esteem, and the desire to succeed. Also, "WOOP" where an immediate plan of action is used to achieve desired results/goals. W= (wish, desired goal) O= (identifying best outcome) O= (determining any obstacles) P= (plan/intervention for success). At first this technique seemed like a gimmick, I have used similar methods from other books to stay focused and mindful of goals. I think WOOP is good, and can work if used regularly. Overall, this was an enlightening and helpful book, though I find research data generally uninteresting, seeming more like filler material when presented throughout a book.
Reference: "Bright Sided: How The Relentless Promotion of Positive Psychology has Undermined America" (2009) ~ Barbara Ehrenreich
~ Dwight D. Eisenhower
"Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation" is an an engaging interesting psychological expose authored by psychologist/researcher Gabriele Oettingen PhD. Oettingen is the professor of psychology at New York University and the University of Hamburg.
With the global economic downturn of 2009, it isn't surprising that the studies in positive psychology have noticeably increased. Oettingen's research/studies have occurred over 20 years in both Germany and the US. Those interviewed have included college students, athletes, the unemployed, medical/therapy patients, people in recovery, children, others from all walks of life.
In 2008, the Pepsi Optimism Project noted in spite the recession, that 94% of people surveyed felt optimistic, an important ideal worldwide. 90% said it was necessary to move society forward. By 2013 American opinion had shifted, a Gallup Poll (2013) found that only 69% were optimistic about future prospects.
Oettingen observes while it is helpful and advantageous to have a positive outlook, especially for short term mental well being, the reality of any given situation determines the outcome; possibly undermining the best efforts to use positive psychology/thinking. For example, therapists use visualization or meditation techniques to relieve stress, or immediate relief of a problem. Optimism is used to sell products as consumers "visualize" their next car, vacation, piece of clothing, etc. Another person may focus on winning the lottery. The downside is over time, positive thinking may become distracting, unrealistic, or delusional leading to a host of other problems including anxiety/depression. This is may occur if a desired outcome wish or goal doesn't happen or materialize.
Oettingen combines two psychological techniques she identifies as "mental contrasting" associated with motivation, self-esteem, and the desire to succeed. Also, "WOOP" where an immediate plan of action is used to achieve desired results/goals. W= (wish, desired goal) O= (identifying best outcome) O= (determining any obstacles) P= (plan/intervention for success). At first this technique seemed like a gimmick, I have used similar methods from other books to stay focused and mindful of goals. I think WOOP is good, and can work if used regularly. Overall, this was an enlightening and helpful book, though I find research data generally uninteresting, seeming more like filler material when presented throughout a book.
Reference: "Bright Sided: How The Relentless Promotion of Positive Psychology has Undermined America" (2009) ~ Barbara Ehrenreich
December 19, 2019
The author came to America to work, from Germany and was struck by the cult of optimism. She started studying optimism in the mid-80s and had found that optimism as an ideology had its limitations in terms of realising the wishes.
Through many experiments, she found that people who dream of outcomes with no regard to the likelihood of success mostly failed to achieve those outcomes. This is because of the mind's inability to differentiate between imagination and reality. When those people strongly imagined - dreamed of - their wish, the mind accepted the wish as being achieved. This led them to relax and to fail to follow through on the actions necessary to achieve the real outcomes.
Her conclusion was that dreams are useful, but need to be tempered by the likelihood of success in order to be a catalyst for achievement. The solution is mental contrasting. This is a method of dreaming of your wishes and concurrently linking that future to the obstacles in your mind, and working out how to respond to those obstacles in pre-determined ways.
Experiments showed that people who used this process had a much higher success rate in achieving their goals than those engaging in just optimistic thinking.
The author proposes a process called WOOP - Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan - which can be used as a daily ritual Doing it daily has the advantage of allowing you to fine-tune your wishes to changing conditions and outcomes. WOOP makes sense as a way to avoid the despair of ideological optimism ending in endless indecision and frustration.
I will try it. I'm optimistic that it will help.
Through many experiments, she found that people who dream of outcomes with no regard to the likelihood of success mostly failed to achieve those outcomes. This is because of the mind's inability to differentiate between imagination and reality. When those people strongly imagined - dreamed of - their wish, the mind accepted the wish as being achieved. This led them to relax and to fail to follow through on the actions necessary to achieve the real outcomes.
Her conclusion was that dreams are useful, but need to be tempered by the likelihood of success in order to be a catalyst for achievement. The solution is mental contrasting. This is a method of dreaming of your wishes and concurrently linking that future to the obstacles in your mind, and working out how to respond to those obstacles in pre-determined ways.
Experiments showed that people who used this process had a much higher success rate in achieving their goals than those engaging in just optimistic thinking.
The author proposes a process called WOOP - Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan - which can be used as a daily ritual Doing it daily has the advantage of allowing you to fine-tune your wishes to changing conditions and outcomes. WOOP makes sense as a way to avoid the despair of ideological optimism ending in endless indecision and frustration.
I will try it. I'm optimistic that it will help.
December 17, 2021
حرف اصلی نویسنده اینه که صِرف خیالپردازی مثبت دربارهی اهداف یا آرزوهامون، یا صِرف در نظر گرفتنِ موانع (بدون خیالپردازی مثبت) نه تنها به تحققشون کمکی نمیکنه، بلکه ما رو از تلاش بازمیداره و در نهایت افسردهترمون میکنه. تکنیکی که پیشنهاد میکنه اسمش «مقابلهی ذهنی» (mental contrasting) ئه.
مقابلهی ذهنی خیلی خلاصه همچین چیزیه: «فواید و احساسات مثبتِ رسیدن به اون هدف/آرزو رو درنظر بگیر، موانع رو هم در نظر بگیر، بعد فکر کن ببین چقدر ممکنه بتونی موانع رو پشت سر بذاری و بهش برسی؟ برای رسیدن بهش باید چه کارهایی بکنی؟» در نهایت دو تصمیم رو ممکنه بگیری: یا میبینی امکان رسیدن به اون هدف/آرزو هست و شروع به تلاش در این راه میکنی، یا میبینی امکانش نیست و کنارش میذاری.
نویسنده صرفاً ادعا نمیکنه و سالها دربارهی این موضوع تحقیق کرده. نتایج تحقیقاتش رو هم در این کتاب بهتفصیل توضیح داده.
من بیشترِ کتاب رو خوندم و از یه جایی به بعد احساس کردم تکرار مکرراته. حالا که لب لبابش رو گرفتم، چه نیازی به ادامه؟ پس رهاش کردم. ممکنه آخر کتاب حرفهای جالبتری بزنه، ولی من دیگه کتاب رو بستهم.
مقابلهی ذهنی خیلی خلاصه همچین چیزیه: «فواید و احساسات مثبتِ رسیدن به اون هدف/آرزو رو درنظر بگیر، موانع رو هم در نظر بگیر، بعد فکر کن ببین چقدر ممکنه بتونی موانع رو پشت سر بذاری و بهش برسی؟ برای رسیدن بهش باید چه کارهایی بکنی؟» در نهایت دو تصمیم رو ممکنه بگیری: یا میبینی امکان رسیدن به اون هدف/آرزو هست و شروع به تلاش در این راه میکنی، یا میبینی امکانش نیست و کنارش میذاری.
نویسنده صرفاً ادعا نمیکنه و سالها دربارهی این موضوع تحقیق کرده. نتایج تحقیقاتش رو هم در این کتاب بهتفصیل توضیح داده.
من بیشترِ کتاب رو خوندم و از یه جایی به بعد احساس کردم تکرار مکرراته. حالا که لب لبابش رو گرفتم، چه نیازی به ادامه؟ پس رهاش کردم. ممکنه آخر کتاب حرفهای جالبتری بزنه، ولی من دیگه کتاب رو بستهم.
August 23, 2016
The book both intrigued and annoyed me. Too many references to her studies with students. Too much emphasis on academic pursuits and not enough about 'real world' issues...
The book has a 'narrowness' feel to it - many times I was asking myself if she was forcing results to match her beliefs.
But her main point regarding fantasizing and motivation is well worth reading.
Not the book I thought it would be but nevertheless worth reading.
The book has a 'narrowness' feel to it - many times I was asking myself if she was forcing results to match her beliefs.
But her main point regarding fantasizing and motivation is well worth reading.
Not the book I thought it would be but nevertheless worth reading.
July 12, 2021
تقریبا خیلی عالی
یکی از دیدگاه های قدیمی و مرسوم رو زیر سوال می بره: این که هر چی مثبت بین تر باشید موفق تر خواهید بود
زبان کتاب، علمی هست، یعنی با ارائه آمار و نتایج یه سری نتایج حرفش رو میزنه
یه سری هم پیشنهاد داره که خوبه
یه مدل داره که فکر کنم اسم انگلیسی کتاب رو سرچ کنید براتون میاره برنامه اش رو
خیلی خوبه خونده بشه و توش گفته میشه که چجوری انگیزه مون رو به بیشترین حالت ممکن برای دستیابی به هدفمون زیاد کنیم
یکی از دیدگاه های قدیمی و مرسوم رو زیر سوال می بره: این که هر چی مثبت بین تر باشید موفق تر خواهید بود
زبان کتاب، علمی هست، یعنی با ارائه آمار و نتایج یه سری نتایج حرفش رو میزنه
یه سری هم پیشنهاد داره که خوبه
یه مدل داره که فکر کنم اسم انگلیسی کتاب رو سرچ کنید براتون میاره برنامه اش رو
خیلی خوبه خونده بشه و توش گفته میشه که چجوری انگیزه مون رو به بیشترین حالت ممکن برای دستیابی به هدفمون زیاد کنیم
February 7, 2015
This book couldn't have been less inspiring. I had no desire to read it. She uses 'positive thinking' in her title, but all the research is about positive fantasizing. Two different things. The Harvard school of positive psychology has done tremendous inspiring work. This book is a series of her uninspired research on some hapless college kids.
November 20, 2021
اولش فکر کردم از این کتابای زرد موفقیت و ایناس ولی وقتی یکم راجع به نویسنده و تحقیقاتش و ایده پشت کتاب خوندم فهمیدم از اون دسته نیست، بعد از خوندن خود کتاب هم خیلی از ایده نویسنده و سادگی و اجرایی بودنش لذت بردم
December 11, 2024
Needed a break read after a sales book. economic costs of over optimism? so much of this book was like aha moments. The next time someone tells you to “think positive,” you might want to ask them to be more specific. As it happens, not all positive thinking is created equal. The problem isn’t optimism itself – it’s that we’ve stopped distinguishing between grounded confidence and wishful thinking.
Notes:
- two decades of research reveal a surprising truth: fantasizing about success can actually hold you back.
- One study followed a group of women trying to lose weight. You might think the ones who harnessed their imagination – who spent time visualizing themselves looking slim – would be more motivated. Instead, they lost 24 pounds less than those who didn’t indulge in these rosy visions.
- A 1988 study of job seekers found that those who frequently imagined themselves in their dream positions ended up sending out fewer applications and landing lower-paying jobs.
- the pattern held: The more people indulged in idealized visions of the future, the less they achieved in reality.
- the excitement, the triumph, the satisfaction – without any of the grueling work of production.
- When we let ourselves get lost in those perfect, polished daydreams, we can end up undermining the very things we’re dreaming about.
- While companies love to blame poor communication or insufficient funding, there’s a deeper issue at play. Just like individuals who daydream about weight loss instead of hitting the gym, organizations can get caught up in the feel-good story of innovation while skipping the hard work of execution. It’s one reason why so many start-ups fail in their first five years – they’re often better at dreaming up the next big thing than doing the unglamorous work of building a sustainable business.
- The first is what psychologists call “positive expectations.” This is the kind of optimism that comes from looking at your past successes and concluding, reasonably, that you’ll succeed again.
- But there’s also its seductive cousin: the free-floating fantasy. This one is untethered from reality. It’s the D student picturing themselves with straight A’s without considering the actual work of changing their habits, or the entrepreneur daydreaming about a billion-dollar IPO without thinking through the countless problems they’ll need to solve first.
- When we engage in pure fantasy, our brains respond as if we’ve already achieved our goal, triggering the same reward circuits that fire when we actually succeed. It feels good – and yet that’s the problem. Instead of motivating us, these pleasant daydreams serve as a kind of mental substitute for real achievement.
- The distinction between reality-based and fantasy positive thinking matters. Why? Because Western culture, particularly in the US, has developed an almost religious devotion to positive thinking. We paste inspirational quotes on office walls, tell our kids they can be anything they dream of, and treat any hint of negative thinking as if it’s contagious. Indeed, expressing doubt or concern can get you labeled as a “downer” or not being a “team player.”
- In many European countries, for instance, people think nothing of answering “How are you?” with an honest account of their troubles. But in the United States, people are more likely to habitually give a positive response, regardless of reality.
After imagining your ideal future, make a pivot; try to identify the main obstacle standing in your way. What within you – not external circumstances – makes achieving this goal challenging? Maybe it’s self-doubt, procrastination, or fear of conflict. The key is to be honest about internal barriers – as opposed to solely external ones.
Research shows this combination is remarkably effective. When people use Mental Contrasting with achievable goals, they become more energized and take more concrete actions toward success. But equally important, when goals aren’t realistic, the technique helps people recognize this fact and redirect their energy toward something more attainable.
WOOP stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan – and it’s that final step that makes all the difference. While the first three steps mirror Mental Contrasting, WOOP adds a crucial element: creating specific “if-then” plans for when you encounter your obstacles. This planning step turns insight into action. When and where is this obstacle most likely to appear? Be specific. Then create a clear statement in this format: “If obstacle X occurs, then I will take action Y.”
“If I open my laptop and feel the urge to check social media instead of working, then I will immediately close all browser tabs and set a 25-minute timer.” If anxiety is holding you back, you might decide, “If I feel myself getting nervous before speaking up in meetings, then I will take three deep breaths and remind myself that my perspective matters.”
Notes:
- two decades of research reveal a surprising truth: fantasizing about success can actually hold you back.
- One study followed a group of women trying to lose weight. You might think the ones who harnessed their imagination – who spent time visualizing themselves looking slim – would be more motivated. Instead, they lost 24 pounds less than those who didn’t indulge in these rosy visions.
- A 1988 study of job seekers found that those who frequently imagined themselves in their dream positions ended up sending out fewer applications and landing lower-paying jobs.
- the pattern held: The more people indulged in idealized visions of the future, the less they achieved in reality.
- the excitement, the triumph, the satisfaction – without any of the grueling work of production.
- When we let ourselves get lost in those perfect, polished daydreams, we can end up undermining the very things we’re dreaming about.
- While companies love to blame poor communication or insufficient funding, there’s a deeper issue at play. Just like individuals who daydream about weight loss instead of hitting the gym, organizations can get caught up in the feel-good story of innovation while skipping the hard work of execution. It’s one reason why so many start-ups fail in their first five years – they’re often better at dreaming up the next big thing than doing the unglamorous work of building a sustainable business.
- The first is what psychologists call “positive expectations.” This is the kind of optimism that comes from looking at your past successes and concluding, reasonably, that you’ll succeed again.
- But there’s also its seductive cousin: the free-floating fantasy. This one is untethered from reality. It’s the D student picturing themselves with straight A’s without considering the actual work of changing their habits, or the entrepreneur daydreaming about a billion-dollar IPO without thinking through the countless problems they’ll need to solve first.
- When we engage in pure fantasy, our brains respond as if we’ve already achieved our goal, triggering the same reward circuits that fire when we actually succeed. It feels good – and yet that’s the problem. Instead of motivating us, these pleasant daydreams serve as a kind of mental substitute for real achievement.
- The distinction between reality-based and fantasy positive thinking matters. Why? Because Western culture, particularly in the US, has developed an almost religious devotion to positive thinking. We paste inspirational quotes on office walls, tell our kids they can be anything they dream of, and treat any hint of negative thinking as if it’s contagious. Indeed, expressing doubt or concern can get you labeled as a “downer” or not being a “team player.”
- In many European countries, for instance, people think nothing of answering “How are you?” with an honest account of their troubles. But in the United States, people are more likely to habitually give a positive response, regardless of reality.
After imagining your ideal future, make a pivot; try to identify the main obstacle standing in your way. What within you – not external circumstances – makes achieving this goal challenging? Maybe it’s self-doubt, procrastination, or fear of conflict. The key is to be honest about internal barriers – as opposed to solely external ones.
Research shows this combination is remarkably effective. When people use Mental Contrasting with achievable goals, they become more energized and take more concrete actions toward success. But equally important, when goals aren’t realistic, the technique helps people recognize this fact and redirect their energy toward something more attainable.
WOOP stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan – and it’s that final step that makes all the difference. While the first three steps mirror Mental Contrasting, WOOP adds a crucial element: creating specific “if-then” plans for when you encounter your obstacles. This planning step turns insight into action. When and where is this obstacle most likely to appear? Be specific. Then create a clear statement in this format: “If obstacle X occurs, then I will take action Y.”
“If I open my laptop and feel the urge to check social media instead of working, then I will immediately close all browser tabs and set a 25-minute timer.” If anxiety is holding you back, you might decide, “If I feel myself getting nervous before speaking up in meetings, then I will take three deep breaths and remind myself that my perspective matters.”
March 15, 2020
Although it is a simple premise, the author offers a profoundly important lesson. Our society celebrates positive thinking, but is starry-eyed optimism actually useful for helping us achieve our goals? The science demonstrates that it is not necessarily helpful to fantasize about achieving something because it makes us feel relaxed, and thus demotivates us. We feel good from indulging in dreaming about success, which can diminish the actual actions we need to take to achieve our goals.
Instead, the other argues that mental contrasting is far more effective as a tool to help us achieve what we want in life. Dream about success first, but then contrast it with the challenges that will be necessary to overcome to achieve the goal. This strategy combined with implementation intentions (developed by the author's husband) are shown to be strongly associated with greater motivation, commitment to the goal, and in the long run, greater achievement.
Instead, the other argues that mental contrasting is far more effective as a tool to help us achieve what we want in life. Dream about success first, but then contrast it with the challenges that will be necessary to overcome to achieve the goal. This strategy combined with implementation intentions (developed by the author's husband) are shown to be strongly associated with greater motivation, commitment to the goal, and in the long run, greater achievement.
Read
January 24, 2024In questo saggio Oettingen spiega come il pensiero positivo, tipico della narrazione mainstream che strizza l’occhio alla società della performance, sia in realtà inefficace.
Con 20 anni di studi a sostegno del suo metodo, ci spiega l’importanza di metterci in ascolto con noi stessi per comprendere al meglio quali siano i nostri veri desideri e quali ostacoli si frappongano fra noi e la loro realizzazione.
Il punto è proprio prendere in considerazione le difficoltà per farne un punto di forza che possa aiutarci davvero a impegnarci per raggiungere un risultato.
Detto così sembra la solita cavolata, ma vi assicuro che non è così.
Il testo si sviluppa a partire dagli studi fatti negli anni ed è ricco di esempi facili da comprendere. Lo ritengo un libro utile da leggere in termini di contenuto, ma per quanto riguarda la “forma” devo ammettere che l’ho trovata pesante, ripetitiva e alcune parti sono pure superflue.
Con 20 anni di studi a sostegno del suo metodo, ci spiega l’importanza di metterci in ascolto con noi stessi per comprendere al meglio quali siano i nostri veri desideri e quali ostacoli si frappongano fra noi e la loro realizzazione.
Il punto è proprio prendere in considerazione le difficoltà per farne un punto di forza che possa aiutarci davvero a impegnarci per raggiungere un risultato.
Detto così sembra la solita cavolata, ma vi assicuro che non è così.
Il testo si sviluppa a partire dagli studi fatti negli anni ed è ricco di esempi facili da comprendere. Lo ritengo un libro utile da leggere in termini di contenuto, ma per quanto riguarda la “forma” devo ammettere che l’ho trovata pesante, ripetitiva e alcune parti sono pure superflue.
August 30, 2018
Інформація, описані експерименти і висновки - дуже корисні, а от життєві історії, вставлені сюди, як дань моди книжкам про мотивацію - нудні.
May 3, 2021
A creative idea for changing behaviors and habits based on a large amount of research. The simplicity of the heuristic - WOOP - is an elegant and practical approach for solving just about any problem.
December 1, 2021
کتاب جالبی بود و برخلاف بقیه کتابهای این تیپی پر از فکت و آزمایش و نتیجه بود. اینش خیلی محترم و خوب بود. فرقش هم از اینجا می اومد که بیشتر کتابهای این حیطه رو آمریکایی ها می نویسن اما این رو یک آلمانی نوشته بود، دقیق و با رفرنس.
یه راهکار عملی معروف هم داره که یک راه و روش مدون، ترو تمیز برای نتیجه تحقیقات داره که روشی هست برای رسیدن به آرزوها و غلبه بر موانع مسیر. برای این راه هم اپلیکیشن هم درست کردن.
تجریه طولانی بود خوندنش و چندین ماه طول کشید.
یه راهکار عملی معروف هم داره که یک راه و روش مدون، ترو تمیز برای نتیجه تحقیقات داره که روشی هست برای رسیدن به آرزوها و غلبه بر موانع مسیر. برای این راه هم اپلیکیشن هم درست کردن.
تجریه طولانی بود خوندنش و چندین ماه طول کشید.
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