Gaining Ground

by Joan Barfoot

An alternative cover edition for this ISBN can be found here.

Gaining Ground is the story of Abra, a woman who leaves her husband, children and suburban security to live as a hermit. She buys an isolated cabin and a piece of land and settles to a life without mirrors, clocks or human The first winter is tremendously hard but her senses sharpen and her muscles harden, and as her socialised masks drop away her rhythms gradually match the seasonal changes dictated by nature, giving her an inner peace and strength which had increasingly eluded her in the world of city and family life. Nine years after Abra chooses solitude and self-sufficiency, her peace is broken by her daughter, now a young woman full of questions as to how and why Abra had 'run out on her' for a life so lacking in conventional comforts. Gaining Ground is beautifully written and within a compelling story raises important and pertinent questions about the right of a woman to self-defined autonomy and solitude when her role is still seen primarily as one of caretaker and nurturer. Joan Barfoot's stunning descriptions of nature will absorb and challenge even those most addicted to socialised urban life, and will speak directly to every reader who has ever considered how frightening - or satisfying - it would be to live completely alone.

Genres: Fiction, Canada, Literature, Feminism, Literary Fiction, Novels, Female Authors

208 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1978

About the author

Joan Barfoot is an award-winning novelist whose work has been compared internationally with that of Anne Tyler, Carol Shields, Margaret Drabble and Margaret Atwood. Her novels include Luck in 2005, nominated for the Scotiabank Giller Prize, as well as Abra, which won the Books in Canada first novels award, Dancing in the Dark, which became an award-winning Canadian entry in the Cannes and Toronto Film Festivals, Duet for Three, Family News, Plain Jane, Charlotte and Claudia Keeping in Touch, Some Things About Flying, and Getting Over Edgar. Her 2001 novel, Critical Injuries, was longlisted for the 2002 Man Booker Prize and shortlisted for the 2001 Trillium Book Award. In 1992 she was given the Marian Engel Award. Also a journalist during much of her career, she lives in London, Ontario, Canada.

Reviews

[Jodi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Though the author is practically a neighbour, this was the first of her books I’d thought to read, and only because it was highly recommended by GR friend, John, as Barfoot's best. I enjoyed it very much, and I'm grateful for the recommendation. Though Abra (aka Gaining Ground in the U.K.) is her first novel, I thought it was very well-written and intelligent. It was published nearly a half-century ago, in 1978, and might have been seen as “risky” for the time as it looks at two issues not commonly explored in any depth back then: mental health and women’s role in marriage and in society. But even now, in 2025, it feels timely and important.

I think the best, most succinct description comes from the author herself: From a comfortable if idle middle-class, urban life, Abra abandons husband and children to live according to her own rhythms and rules. Years later her now-grown daughter finds her, raising questions about duty, love, selfishness, sanity and the nature of motherhood.

After a decade of marriage and children aged 9 and 14, Abra drifts deeply into mental and emotional distress. She becomes distant—detached even—from her children, her husband, and from all facets of domestic life. She’s now viewing her world through a fog.

Only when a run-down, isolated cabin comes into view does she suddenly see things clearly, as though this is meant to be “home”. She returns to her family that night, planning to leave the next day. Her husband can see something’s wrong. He asks what it is and offers to help. He loves her and is willing to do anything, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. She seems to be almost in a trance. She believes there’s no stopping this now; she must get her things in order. She’s got to leave.

And with that, her life as a wife and mother is over. She turns away and never once looks back. As the days, weeks, and months pass, she soon forgets all that was part of “that other life”. Now she lives without clocks or mirrors. She lives as a hermit, grows her own food, chops wood for heat. And, eventually, she forgets her own name, until a stranger appears in her garden one morning and shyly asks, Abra? The young woman looks familiar; Abra struggles to think who she might be. It’s her daughter. She’s finally found her, and she’s looking for answers. But she might not find them.

I found Abra to be an excellent read. It’s a novel that's full of contradictions. I wasn’t terribly satisfied with the ending, but I know many others will be. We all see things differently, and I suppose that’s what makes life interesting.🙂

4 “Be-True-to-Yourself” stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐

[John Gilbert · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of my all time favourites, terrific mother/daughter exploration. She's from my GR friend Jodi's hometown even. Wonderful writer, first read this one over 30 years ago.

ps Jodi, I see it is now called Abra in both Aussie and US kindles for some reason. I only found a few of her books available, but I've put three on my WTR list that are there and I haven't read. I cannot believe she isn't more read as her writing is sublime.

[Vicki Heneker · Rating 5 out of 5]

When working at the State Library many years ago I read this book, as I was interested in reading books by the Feminist Press, at the time. Some of their books were of no interest to me, however Gaining Ground resonated with me as at the time I was going through the whole idea of wanting to end my marriage. Which I did, however the book meant more to me at that time, I believe because of my personal circumstances. Over the years I thought of the book many times, and could never find it again, especially once I had left my work at the library. Eventually after not being able to buy it anywhere I search e-bay and was able to find a good second hand copy. Now I have my very own copy and can read it to my hearts content. I have found that even over so many years, the story has not lost its appeal to me. It might not be for everyone, but I love the guts of the woman in this story and how she copes with living in an isolated, cold environment and her eventual decision that she makes. Wonderful story.

[Jo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful. So much food for thought. I never re-read books, but this is one of the first I'll make an exception for. A book every woman should read.

[Amanda Alice · Rating 5 out of 5]

Looks at a woman who's left her family - successful husband and two children - to live by herself in a cabin on several wooded acres. It is interesting to consider the roles women maintain as mothers and wives in our society and what it means when they leave those roles. Though this book is sometimes sad, but it is always insightful.

[Jesse · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's not often that one book will completely take over all my reading & force me to give it my full attention until it is completed—but that's exactly what happened here. Flinty & unsparing, refusing easy answers or expected explanations at every turn, this is a novel unapologetically built around an unlikable character which makes it in turn a rather unlovable little book.

Or I imagine that's the case for many, & the main reason why this remains largely unknown outside of a small (but as reviews here demonstrate, extremely devoted) cultish following. But I loved Abra from the jump; or at least deeply respected the way she—& so by extension we—grapple so ruthlessly with the thorny issues of personal autonomy, social/familial responsibility, kinship, the right to self-determination, beautifully delineated through Barfoot's sedulous, coldly elegant prose. An instant all-time favorite.

"And then I left them, left all of it. Nothing in particular, but something began to happen, and it ended in the spring I came here. The ending was clear and distinct and cold and final; I search, but cannot find the beginning. I have snapshots in my mind, but there are no answers; only labels on the back."

[Julia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Was für ein Buch – zu Unrecht in Vergessenheit geraten. Meisterhaft. Radikal. Eine feingesponnene Innenschau, ein Frauenporträt, das mit Marlen Haushofers „Die Wand“ ein wunderbares Double Feature abgibt.

(passed down to me by my aunt and mother - which I find most wonderful.)

Siehe auch:
Backlisted. Episode 215.

[Portia · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of my favourites. Good for discussion.

[Deb · Rating 5 out of 5]

My favorite book of all!

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

A remarkable and challenging book. I will have more to say, but want to reread the novel and reconsider my thoughts before putting them down.

[Erich Keller · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved reading this book. It allowed me to contact that part of myself that has often wondered could I do it. How close am I to doing it. And what would I reach if I did. Would I gain ground. A story of impossible bravery, survival and reconciliation.

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've read this book twice. Once at age around 30, again in my late sixties. I adored it first time around and felt an urgent need to reread it and see if it still held meaning for me. I scoured second hand bookshelves for years and finally snapped up a slightly battered edition in the good old dark green colour of The Women's Press - legend!
And I still loved it. In some of the same ways - adoring how the wilderness that Abra retreated to was a character in its own right and feeling bereft for the land at the thought she might choose to leave. Feeling triumphant that she had bravely walked away from a traditional woman's life to claim her own identity. Her determination and physicality.

Yes this time around I noticed a few things such as a total absence of any mention of sexual feelings or managing menstruation. Also that there are some very dense paragraphs. But that's all absolutely fine. I still love it and consider one of the most influential novels I have ever read.

[Elfrieda · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this topic very interesting. It's about a woman who chucks away her life and goes to live by herself, living off the land, in isolation.

I grew up loving "Hatchet", "My Side of the Mountain", "Island of the Blue Dolphins", "Cry Wolf", and "Julie of the Wolves".

I often daydreamed about escaping my family and school, then marriage and children by leaving to be alone in the wilderness, and being away from all the pressures and expectations from other people. This book really dives into what that would look like. I can say it cured me, for sure! Not the life I want, not at all. I really appreciate this novel, it was very "inner", and explored what that would be like and what sort of person you would have to turn into in order to accomplish it.

[Abra · Rating 4 out of 5]

I first read this book in the late '80s, when its (American or British, at any rate) title was Gaining Ground. It was upsetting and fascinating. At 48, I am less upset, but still pretty fascinated at the deconstruction of a woman's experience of losing her self in marriage and children. When I got the book, it was published by Woman's Press, with their distinctive diagonal zebra stripes on the cover. I am nostalgic for that Press. At any rate, it is interesting to read, and to try to figure out whether the protagonist is a symbol for feminist self-fulfilment, or selfish and also alienated from humans. Well worth reading.

[Cheryl · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book has an interesting plot: what would happen if you walked away from your current life, and started a new life. Abra is a wife and mother, and one day decides to move to a small house out in the country--without telling anyone in her family what she is doing. She had been left a small sum of money in a will, and Abra uses this to purchase the property and to live on. She is enjoying life, until years later, when her daughter tracks her down. Very enjoyable.

[Georgina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read in 1979 and still remembered in 2022. Added now as the friend I borrowed it from is staying.

[Digby · Rating 4 out of 5]

Chilling.

[Pedro João · Rating 5 out of 5]

talvez o melhor livro que li em 23 anos! o que me lembra que a vida ainda tem muito para oferecer

[Rosslyn Bower]

Don’t be defeated, have the courage to believe in yourself and, no matter how selfish it may seem to those around you, do what is best for yourself, otherwise be the sacrificial lamb? If others aren’t listening to you and taking heed of your distress, you need to reflect upon “different planets, different language … fly away?” Fortitude, belief in yourself, courage - like it/lump it/learn to live with it/leave it?

[lucy black · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very simple book with clear settings and a slow plot. It is mostly the main characters internal monologue and confused musings about herself. There was enough plot and dialogue though, so it wasn't too boring. I found the first few chapters pretty disturbing and cold and sad but the rest of the book explains where all that came from.

[LOL_BOOKS]

I HAVE NO RECS IF YOU'RE SPECIFICALLY LOOKING FOR FICTION ABOUT PEOPLE RECOVERING FROM INVOLUNTARY ISOLATION, BUT I CAN REC A NOVEL ABOUT A WOMAN WHO JUST SAYS FUCK IT TO BEING IN SOCIETY AND GOES OFF TO LIVE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. IT'S CALLED GAINING GROUND BY JOAN BARFOOT AND IT IS A++.

[Lewis Hotchkiss · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read, especially if you own enough land to make a go of it. Forrest Pritchard shows you how to make better money going organic gradually, and changing your market places. However, see reviews by real farmers who have actually used some of Forrest's tips to make my review even better.

[Joan Barton · Rating 4 out of 5]

read in '82 and again in '13

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

So good, but the ending was uneventful and a bit infuriating. Beautiful written, though. Great imagery. I was right there with the main character in her little cabin in the woods.

[Ian Mond]

Some novels don’t immediately open themselves up to the reader. You need to have patience and allow the book to come to you.

That’s how I experienced Abra. I found the first thirty or so pages hard-going. There’s a choppiness to the prose as our titular protagonist—who hasn’t spoken to anyone in nine years—finds her voice. But as Abra flashes back to her past, recalling the name and life she once lived, I found myself drawn into the narrative. By the end of the novel I was ensconced in this book, in its radicalism, its knottiness, its beauty. The fact you can only read this electronically—print copies can go for as much as $200—is a crime.

"My name is Abra. My name is Abra." She must say it twice because she’s almost forgotten who she was. Nine years ago, Abra left her husband and two children for a cabin in the wilds of Ontario in Canada—a place with no mirrors or clocks, where time exists entirely in the present. Nine years later, Abra’s eighteen-year-old daughter, Kate, tracks her down, desperate to know why she walked out on them.

If, like Kate, you’re expecting a straightforward answer to that question, you’ll be sorely disappointed. Abra cannot explain why she left; only that she had to get away, that her life as Abra wasn’t what she wanted or who she was. More than three decades later, Rachel Cusk is pilloried for having the audacity of not so much regretting having children but acknowledging that they subsume a mother’s life. Cusk, at least, didn’t walk away from her family. Abra did. And that’s what makes Barfoot’s novel so provocative, an argument against the mainstream portrayal of motherhood: the need to be a mother.

It’s too easy to frame Abra as a novel about depression and mental health. Doing so strongly implies that Abra’s decision to walk out on her family wasn’t rational but a cry for help. The Abra in the cabin, though she’s no longer known by that name or any name, is so utterly at peace with herself. She is happy. I get it, though. Her happiness and her need for solitude have come at the expense of her children, and both have permanently changed (for the worse in the case of her son Eddie) through the experience. And that’s tragic. The scene where her husband comes to the cabin a year after Abra left is so soul-crushing because he’s a kind, loving man—a very progressive take on masculinity for the mid-70s—and yet Abra can’t fulfil his simple need to know what he did wrong, what he did that made her leave.

And that’s why this debut novel—because, yes, this was Barfoot’s first crack at longer-form fiction—is so damn extraordinary. It’s because we come to love Abra while feeling deep sympathy and sadness for those she left behind. It’s a book comfortable with contradiction. And I love that.

P.S. The quote from The Calgary Herald couldn’t be so wrong. And the cover… oh, God, the cover.

[Kirsten · Rating 3 out of 5]

Abra lebt ein sorgenfreies Leben. Sie hat einen Mann, der sie liebt und in allem unterstützt, zwei wunderbare Kinder und lebt in einem schönen Haus. von außen betrachtet ist es die Warum wift sie dann alles hin und zieht in eine Hütte im Wald, wo sie ganz auf sich alleine gestellt lebt. Fast ohne Kontakt zur Aussenwelt und ohne Kontakt zu ihrer Familie?

Was für eine Frau muss das sein, die ihre Kinder verläßt? Diese Frage habe ich mri spontan gestellt. Auf der anderen Seite stellt sich niemand diese Frage, wenn ein Mann geht. Deshalb formuliere ich meine Frage anders: was muss passiert sein, damit Abra ihre Familie verlassen konnte?

Die Antwort war einfach: es war nie ihre Familie. Es war etwas, das andere Leute für sie wollten. Abra und ihr Mann haben geheiratet, weil das der nächste Schritt in ihrer Beziehung war. Sie hatte von Anfang an Zweifel, am Abend vor der Hochzeit hatte sie sogar einen Zusammenbruch. Als sie dann verheiratet waren, hat sie versucht das Beste daraus zu machen. Sie hat ihren Mann unterstützt, damit er seine Ausbildung fortsetzen konnte. Sie hat Kinder bekommen, weil sie das so beschlossen hatten. Sie hat ein neues Haus gesucht, weil sie sich das jetzt leisten konnten.



Während der ganzen Zeit hat sie ihre Gefühle und Wünsche hintenan gestellt. Abra hat nie offen gesagt, wenn sie etwas nicht wollte oder sie etwas bedrückt hat. Und genau das werfe ich ihr vor. Nicht, dass sie ausgebrochen ist. Sondern wie sie es getan hat. Auf mich hat sie den Eindruck einer selbstbewussten Frau gemacht, die immer den scheinbar leichteren Weg gewählt hat. Irgendwann war die Unzufriedenheit zu groß. Anfangs hat sie eine Szene gemacht, wie vor einem wichtigen Geschäftsessen. Danach ging es weiter, ohne dass sich etwas geändert hat.



Auch wenn ich ihrem Mann vorwerfe, dass er nicht gesehen hat, was mit seiner Frau los ist: er hat immer versucht, ihr zu helfen. Dass er das komlett falsch gemacht hat, liegt nicht an seinem schlechten Willen. Sondern daran, dass die beiden nie miteinander reden konnten. Es scheint, als ob sie zwei verschiedene Sprachen gesprochen haben.

Die Hütte zu kaufen und einfach zu verschwinden, war wieder der leichtere Weg. Richtiger und viel schwieriger wäre gewesen, wenn Abra gesagt hätte dass sie nicht mehr so weiterleben kann und den Entschluss gefasst hat. Aber dann hätte sie sich den Gefühlen ihrer Familie stellen müssen und dazu ist sie meiner Meinung nach nicht fähig. Auch wie sie in der Hütte lebt, ist der leichtere Weg. Sie plant nicht, sondern lebt vor sich hin Natürlich lernt sie aus ihrer Erfahrung, aber ich glaube nicht dass sie wirklich weiß, was sie da macht.

Ich kann verstehen, dass Abra aus ihrem alten Leben ausgebrochen ist. Wie sie es getan hat, kann ich nicht verstehen. Das wäre nicht mein Weg gewesen.

[Aryalila · Rating 5 out of 5]

How many of us have dreamt of fleeing our humdrum lives and responsibilities to live alone in nature? This is the choice Abra makes. As a wife and mother, she was disappearing, both from her family and from herself; belonging nowhere. I'm still wondering whether this is a novel about mental illness, or about self actualisation? Or about living a life where self and other, subject and object, does not apply. In some ways, the choice Abra makes leads her into radical mindfulness; a prolonged solitary retreat such as a Buddhist might choose. Yet she leaves her children and husband for that solitude. As readers, we cannot help but evaluate this choice - do we censure her or applaud her? Or feel compassion and understanding?

The world seeks Abra out again, in the form of her now 18 year old daughter. It seems to me that Abra gives her daughter a gift; but does it compensate for the abandonment?

[Emma · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is an undiscovered diamond. A beautiful story about the radical life choices of a woman who puts her own happiness in life above her maternal duties. The book makes us understand the anguish that can come with an unquestioningly conformist life. A sudden awakening in a deep pit of depression makes the protagonist make a radical decision for herself. The book scares and gives strength at the same time. I was deeply moved. Thank you to the author.

P.S. Probably especially women will be able to identify with the book.

[Kerry Hullett · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not all humans are social beings. Abra withdraws from the world, abandons her family and finds her own peace. If there is an explanation as to why she hated family life so deeply she is unable to articulate it - and that's kind of the point. Ironically she seems to swap one life built on routine domesticity and swap it for another - so the conclusion must be that it's intimacy that she lacks and does not seek.

[Anna Shumeeva · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book meant everything to me.
It describes perfectly the fleeting but re-occurring feeling of being out of place, but not being exactly sure why– until you find inner peace and belonging within yourself.
It effortlessly transported me deep into serene vegetation and made me nostalgic for the life of a hermit. Will read again, do recommend.