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Losing Helen
Losing Helen is a moving and inspiring essay that tracks an adult daughter through the many complex phases of grief as she anticipates the inevitable loss of her elderly mother. Finding strength and guidance in the spiritual insights of writers, artists, Western religion, and Eastern philosophies, the narrator undergoes a profound transformation while striving to design an end-of-life experience that is meaningful and sacred not only for her mother but also for herself.
- GenresNonfictionEssays
120 pages, Paperback
Published September 22, 2016
255 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
February 25, 2019
Becker writes a lovely long-form essay on coping with the death of her mother. It is moving in the history she writes, the memoir and praise for they woman her mother is and was, and how Becker struggled and came to terms with death in a way she never expected. I found it moving and lovely.
April 11, 2019
A gorgeous essay.
April 22, 2019
Amazingly candid and clear; a true unmasking of the process of dying.
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May 23, 2021Lovely, engrossing and profound.
June 14, 2025
An experience many can relate to, told in intimate -yet sometimes nebulous- detail.
At the finishing of Helen's story, I find myself with homework (contents of pages 103 and 104) rather than closure.
At the finishing of Helen's story, I find myself with homework (contents of pages 103 and 104) rather than closure.
October 2, 2016
"Losing Helen", by Carol Becker, is the story of Becker's mother's death in 2005. Carol was the only child of Helen and George, and after George died 20 years earlier, Carol was her mother's mainstay, though they lived far apart - Helen in Florida and Carol in Chicago in her mother's final years. In tone, the book is similar - though shorter - than Roz Chast's "Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant".
Helen Becker died at the age of 97 in her residence in Tamarac, Florida. Helen and her husband had moved to Florida upon retirement and moved into an apartment complex filled with their own cohort. As the residents, including her husband, began to die off, Helen Becker maintained her independence til almost the end. Writing about her parents' religious difference - George was Jewish and Helen was a lapsed Polish-Catholic - Carol and her mother weren't Jewish, exactly, but were definitely accepted and loved by George's family. Carol seems to have become more spiritual by adding Buddhism and other Asian practices to her life.
Carol's memories of her mother include both her life and her death. That's the way a memory should be.
Helen Becker died at the age of 97 in her residence in Tamarac, Florida. Helen and her husband had moved to Florida upon retirement and moved into an apartment complex filled with their own cohort. As the residents, including her husband, began to die off, Helen Becker maintained her independence til almost the end. Writing about her parents' religious difference - George was Jewish and Helen was a lapsed Polish-Catholic - Carol and her mother weren't Jewish, exactly, but were definitely accepted and loved by George's family. Carol seems to have become more spiritual by adding Buddhism and other Asian practices to her life.
Carol's memories of her mother include both her life and her death. That's the way a memory should be.
November 1, 2016
Carol Becker's mother, Helen, is the subject of this slim volume. Carol can't imagine losing her mother, and understandably doesn't want to talk about it, even as her mother passes her 93rd birthday. Life happens, and Carol reviews the highlights of each stage of her mother's days on earth, woven with the help she received.
October 10, 2016
A truly touching story about Carol Becker's deepest affection and caring of her mother during her final months of life, and a real-life experience that is full of wisdom and courage.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews