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House Rules

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a novel, "brutal, sensual, honest, & seductive"

321 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 1994

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1167 people want to read

About the author

Heather Lewis

3 books85 followers
Librarian note:
There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name


Heather Lewis was born in Bedford, New York and attended Sarah Lawrence College. She is the author of three published novels. The first, House Rules (1994), details the experiences of a fifteen year old girl working as a show rider of horses-an experience the author herself had in her teenage years. Lewis's second novel, The Second Suspect (1998), follows the struggles of a female police investigator trying to prove the guilt of a powerful and influential businessman responsible for the rape and murder of several young women. The third, posthumously published novel, Notice (2004), describes the experiences of a young prostitute, Nina and her involvement with a sadist and his wife. Her works explore aspects of American culture, such as the connections between power, drugs, sex, violence, love and justice. Through these themes, Heather Lewis draws the reader into questioning the nature of love and relationships, the character of human nature or motivation and, most challengingly, the boundary between pleasure and pain. Significantly, the novels present strong, yet vulnerable female characters offering an alternative to more typical American narrative constructions driven by male protagonists within male-dominated scenes.

Heather Lewis taught at the Writer's Voice and contributed to various anthologies of literature including Best Lesbian Erotica (1996, 1997), Once Upon a Time: Erotic Fairy Tales for Women (1996), and A Woman Like That: Lesbian and Bisexual Writers Tell Their Coming Out Stories (1999). The collection also includes work by Allan Gurganus, Dale Peck, Mike Corrigan, Margaret Au, as well as shorter pieces by Sarah Schulman, Meg Daly, and others. Heather Lewis returned to New York in the fall of 2001, after a year in Arizona. She ended her life in May of 2002, in New York.

Sources:
Memorial service program: St. Mark's Church, New York, NY, June 12, 2002.
"Pain and Perfection" (Anonymous). The Advocate; Los Angeles, June 11, 2002.

From: The Fales Library and Special Collections

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5 stars
62 (26%)
4 stars
72 (31%)
3 stars
58 (25%)
2 stars
23 (9%)
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17 (7%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 47 reviews
Profile Image for Bill Kupersmith.
Author 1 book245 followers
May 4, 2016
In some ways Natalie Scott’s Rules for Riders, Anton Disclafani’s The Yonahloosee Riding Camp for Girls, and this book, Heather Lewis’s House Rules, seem different versions of the same basic story - a young equestrienne’s discovery of the real world. If they were films, Scott’s might be PG13 light romance & Disclafani’s an epic rated R. Lewis’s: Unrated & full-frontal - no certificate, no cuts, & no concessions to the censors. Like Megan Abbott’s Dare Me, House Rules struck me as achieving tragic status, tho’ whether you should read it as a full-scale tragedy depends on how believable you find Lee’s situation @ the end.

My experience with hunters & jumpers is entirely second hand. My world was sailing; but both riding and yachting satisfy some of our highest aspirations, demanding skill, intense competitiveness, dedication, physical endurance, & courage in the face of danger. In both we adapt to the demands of beautiful, unpredictable, & often expensive, @ the top echelon extremely expensive indeed, partners - horses or yachts. Which makes riding and sailing traditional pursuits for the rich. But by no means exclusively. Horses need riders & yachts need crew & both require a lot of maintenance & there are many young people in particular who would offer their whole lives to riding or to sailing - whose entire net wealth fits into a duffle bag. If that choice of life ever appealed when you were young (I’m gazing wistfully @ my old yellow seabag), you’ll find you share a lot with Lee.

As Aristotle pointed out long ago, we enjoy good representations in fiction of things we would not enjoy at all in real life, whether Oedipus stabbing himself in the eyeballs, or in Lee’s case, what it would feel like to mount a horse after being fisted. I cannot imagine wanting to be a bottom, but can see in being a sexual passive a form of misplaced spirituality, a wrong turn in the path to what Ignatius designated as the third level of humility - perfect identification with Jesus’ suffering. But tho’ some of the blurb descriptions of this book make it sound like a work of Lesbian S/M erotica, I did not find that @ all. The sex scenes seemed more descriptions of extreme unarmed combat or OTT hazing @ a very bad fraternity or military school. The very heavy drug use in the novel represents a Dionysiac spirituality, as in Donna Tartt’s The Secret History. (I’d known from my hospital experience the Dilaudid was the good stuff, but now I know why & that you can use it to control both horses & riders.) Like some other favorite characters, Lee is both extremely tough and very vulnerable. She doesn’t know how to recognize or repay generosity, yet she has an enormous capacity to endure abuse while retaining her personal dignity.

But tho’ the sex in House Rules is not all that erotic, this book excels other novels about young athletes in the erotics of extreme competition. You can almost feel you’re in the saddle with Lee & smell the horse lather. Amber Dermont hadn’t a clue how to do that with dingy sailing in The Starboard Sea. Even Yonahloosee Riding Camp - tho’ belonging to a higher level of literature - doesn’t take you over the jumps with Thea Atwell as Heather Lewis lets you ride with Lee. The only thing I’ve read recently that matches this in sheer intensity is the chapter in Dare Me where the Sutton Grove cheer squad elevate Beth Cassidy for what is expected to be the culminating 2-2-1. (Beth, we recall, was also an equestrienne as well as a cheer captain.)

I read House Rules shortly after Pamela Moore’s Chocolates for Breakfast, & of course am haunted by the similarities not only with their main characters, but by the fates of their authors (who join Lucy Grealy & Judee Sill in my pantheon of martyrs to misplaced spirituality.) Artistically, the fate of the author shouldn’t affect our estimate of the meaning & quality of her work, but of course it does. Heather Lewis left behind a couple more novels about teenaged girls who suffer a lot of abuse. They may be too OTT even for me, but I expect I’ll eventually try one of them, when I’m ready to revisit the wilder shores. For now tho’ it’s back to cozier books featuring mere serial killers & such.
Profile Image for Greg Urbaitis.
3 reviews1 follower
April 25, 2020
I'd never read a book authored by someone who was once a very close friend. Add to that that I've only recently found out she became an author. And that she took her own life, before I made this discovery.

In the early 80's we were coworkers, neighbors, and cohorts. I would have loved to have seen a book by her about those times, as she could clearly speak of them better than I could. It would've been an amazing trip down memory lane of a time when she, my girlfriend and myself were the oddest kids in the sleepy little town of Mt. Kisco, NY. Hi may have to to write it myself.

Her writing style encompasses everything I love and revere in a writer - a simple, heartfelt honesty that is the hardest thing to achieve.

I wish we hadn't lost touch in the madness of our early twenties, but that's what that age is all about - breaking free and realizing your own self.

We talked all the time back then, but not about the things I am finding reading her works.

It just makes me miss her all that much more.
Profile Image for Jeannie Miller .
126 reviews7 followers
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August 4, 2020
This reads like the sort of first novel one would write to try to exorcise a lifetime of abuse: it is searing and unflinching in its portrait of a young woman whose life is spent by day in the high-gloss world of the horse show circuit, and by night in the thrall of a series of depraved manipulative adults and equally wounded peers. Lewis's is a powerful voice, and not just because her subject matter is so disturbing: she conveys viscerally the complicated emotions and motivations of her protagonist and the topsy-turvy reality of someone struggling to cope with abuse and at the same time to satisfy ordinary human needs for intimacy and accomplishment. It was difficult to get through but I'm glad I did.
Profile Image for DoctorM.
842 reviews2 followers
October 27, 2013
Powerful, bleak, disturbing... I read it because it was reviewed somewhere as a kind of Bret Easton Ellis for the equestrian world--- one reviewer sardonically called it "the finest novel ever written about coked-out lesbian fist-fucking on the wealthy horse-show circuit". It's a lot more than that. It's dark enough, God knows, and there's a lot in it about drugs, transgressive sex, and the technical world of show jumpers. But it's also about a young heroine trying to put up walls between herself and a world full of abuse and pain...and wondering whether the walled-off life is worse than what a series of men and women do with her. A good novel by an author whose own life was deeply tragic and ended far too soon.
10 reviews18 followers
October 21, 2022
Wow, that was intense. Unsettling, and hard to read half the time. I am very very sorry the author had to endure things like this. May she rest in peace
Profile Image for Sarah Fonseca.
Author 11 books37 followers
June 25, 2018
Given our culture's evergreen fixation with elite lives in spiral, I'm baffled that House Rules hasn't experienced a second wind like Heather Lewis' Notice. Perhaps this has something to do with the novel's rights: House Rules was a New Narrative gem published by Serpent's Tail during the early days of the UK house's short-lived US division. Then again, existing US NN house Semiotex(e) doesn't have a good record of intuitively republishing books when their authors reenter literary work consciousness (cough, Shulamith Firestone, cough).

It's easy to call Lewis' work explicit, unnecessarily violent, or harrowing without taking note of what she does on the page: describing agony succinctly, vividly, and humorously without launching into a trauma studies lecture; using metaphor when one least expects it; immerses the reader in trauma's patterns of behavior and disorientation ("am I supposed to be finding this sexy?"); uses first person, knowing full well that it indicts her own personal history.

Set in the strenuous and haphazard equestrian world of the Northeastern Eastern United States, House Rules immerses the reader as effortlessly as its 15 year-old protagonist breaks in a horse. There is sex that masquerades as a drug and drugs that masquerade as sex, which obvi means the center cannot hold. This is a page turner that even the most iron-gutted of readers will have to put down from time to time, if only to remember that it isn't their experience.

Profile Image for Matthew Gallaway.
Author 4 books80 followers
April 18, 2015
Harrowing account of a fifteen-year old girl's descent into drug use, sex (mostly with her fellow riders/trainers), and horse showing/jumping. The sex and drug writing is remarkably descriptive without ever being self-indulgent or overwrought. This book isn't exactly "punk rock" but is maybe something that arose out of it, like certain strands of shoegaze.
Profile Image for Amy.
110 reviews
August 13, 2025
Edit: On September 22 2017, I rewrote this review.

New review below:

[I've excluded the blurb on Heather's biography, but it's included in my original link]

Not exactly spoilers in this review, but general outline of the plot (so you might want to avoid it!)

Profile Image for Initially NO.
Author 29 books35 followers
July 25, 2016
It’s hard sometimes for me to decide whether I want to read a book that is this violent. But then I could ask myself, if I had met the author, Heather Lewis, while she was still alive and she told me of the abuse would I listen? Yes, absolutely, because I like her voice, despite what she needs to talk about. I can’t see myself running out to buy her next book, anymore than I would eagerly question the author further about fist-fucking and needle jabbing, but all the same this book is really well written, got to give it credit for that.

Publishers rejected her second novel because it was too full on, more so than this one, apparently. It only got published after her third book and her suicide. I just wonder what would’ve happened if Helen Lewis’s life had been different and she could write about other topics that were less sickening, because I reckon she would’ve gone on to write many more books that could be widely received.

I find myself reading a scene uttering, ‘Errr! How can you do that to her!’ Putting the book down and not wanting to read anymore, then picking it up again because I want to see that the narrator somehow wins. She wins a horse grand prix. But she’s being doped up with ‘horse heroin’ by the nurse at the time who fist fucks her after she sticks her. Nope, Lee doesn’t win, or find love. But she is such a strong character. And the descriptions of riding are vivid and it’s all so real. I just wish it wasn’t such a nasty situation she was in, victim of incest and then running away only to find herself with people who abuse each other… Hang on, this is fiction isn’t it? Um, sort of, maybe, probably a lot of biography in there too. In any case, this stuff happens. I just so wish it didn’t. It is a really good literary novel. I only knock it because I’m squeamish about violence and therefore my enjoyment of the read is hampered by these scenes of frequent sexual violations.
Profile Image for Keith [on semi hiatus].
175 reviews57 followers
Read
December 2, 2019
Oh man, what to say, I need to let this digest. It's my second Heather Lewis novel and I miss her work now moreso than ever. Thank goodness there's her second novel in my unread list of her bibliography, that, and her earlier short contributions.

I wish this were longer, but, then again, longer is never going to be enough. I feel in a way that's symbolic of Lee's drug use, where upon being hooked there is no end to it's delight until settling for what is as enough.

The horses also working as a symbol I think is a possibility, where each horse could represent a character in a way with the penultimate effect being the death of something beautiful because of mistreatment.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Emily.
36 reviews
May 19, 2008
This book is about a 15 year-old runaway working as a professional show jumper and getting really heavily into drugs and entangled in sadomasochistic lesbian relationships. I found out 3/4 of the way through that the author killed herself by overdose at the age of 40, and cried the rest of the way through the book. Raw and honest and heartbreaking.
Profile Image for Kate.
61 reviews1 follower
December 2, 2010
A troubling and deeply affecting book about a young woman's struggle with drugs, sex, control and professional show jumping. Probably best for people who have a lot of horse knowledge and aren't squeamish about fairly dramatic sex scenes.
Profile Image for Vicky.
2 reviews3 followers
June 24, 2008
First and only book I've ever hated. Actually threw it away when I was done.
Profile Image for gwen :).
15 reviews2 followers
January 27, 2025
this was probably the most stressful book i’ve ever read. there is not a single moment where i felt as a reader that i could relax. i had a sinking feeling in my stomach the entire time and just kind of read on in some sort of shock as the situation somehow manages to get worse and worse. this is really gritty, and it packs a powerful punch. the ending is very unsatisfying and left me with this feeling of dread. i really loved this book but it was a lot to get through emotionally. i probably would not recommend this to anyone, even though i personally found it worth the read. i’m hoping in the next few years this gets republished like Notice did, because this was next to impossible to find a physical copy of, and I think Heather Lewis’s works should be preserved. 5 stars.
2 reviews
October 13, 2020
*may contain spoilers*

Warning: If you are looking for a book about horses and showing, this is NOT it. This is not the type of feel good, under dog winning the championship type of book. This is a book that shows the horse industry —that other aspect of the industry—that we know exists. And it’s graphic. Very, very graphic.

I do wish we knew more about the main character: How did she start riding and how she got into the show scene, because the level she is showing is not an easy place to be. You need money—even as a catch rider, you need money and you need to be good enough to have a name that people want you showing their horses. Affiliation with a barn sure, but you need to win, and win a lot. So, right there, the level of this character’s skill is a bit frustrating, because as the writer does take you through moments of riding at the shows, they are of someone who is skilled.
Next, we have a lot of unanswered questions about some main characters: Carl is alleged to be married, but we never hear of the wife, any history of the wife, other than 2 references. Even when the main character, Lee, stays with them in between shows, the wife is never even alluded to, but many other characters have their stories and history laid out up front. Confusing.

I think the part I find troublesome is the graphic sex—which is not about passion, but about pain. I understand why this was introduced, but after awhile, it does get old—and I would feel the same about heterosexual sex. To me, I always found sex in a book to be a filler when someone’s main story wasn’t strong enough. In this story, yes, it has purpose, but the extensive way it’s described over and over again, you sort of start to say ‘ok, is this it?’ In the beginning, it’s purpose was highlighted, but as we progress in the story, it just starts to work like a broken record. Obviously these incidents impacted on the writer, who wrote this obviously from experience. But, I feel it was to hide a greater feeling and emotion and story. Which is a shame.

Sex, drugs, abuse—yes, that’s the darker side of the horse industry—any walk of life to be honest. We choose what we want to be a part of, even if you have had a life that created the spiral. The key element is what choice to you want to make. And that is where House Rules gets it. The main character starts to realize where she is, what is going on and the ending, which if this is a real experience, I’ve never heard of this happening, comes to a very real and sobering reality.

I did rack my brain trying to guess who these people were, but this author was about ten years or so ahead of me in the horse industry. Still, I have my suspicions as to who, but the final element of the story would still be talked about today, if it really happened. So, this is where I wonder if some creative license was taken. Tragedies like that have a way of circulating through the industry, especially at such a prestigious show.

If you don’t have a problem with the context of the story, it is a very interesting read and very, very well written. Aside for a few things, I wish Miss Lewis had stayed with the world. I think she would have given a voice to many like her.

A side note, there seems to be some confusion about the show jumping in this story. The characters in this story, while riding jumpers, are likely not at a Grand Prix Level. Even back in the day, horses had to qualify to ride at prestigious competitions. The level they are riding is a the A rated level, which is still competitive, but not the International Level, for which riders travel to other countries. This is Grand Prix at the National Level. Still competitive, but I find it hard to believe that “Carl’ started it. Um, no, the GP Level was around long before Lee was born, and continued and has continued long after. So, again I’m not quite sure why that was implied.
Profile Image for Bridget.
1,107 reviews5 followers
May 10, 2009
Heather Lewis was a powerhouse. I read this book while I was in Japan and it changed my world. I wanted very badly to write her a letter and composed one in my head multiple times. I never wrote it or sent it a few years later she killed herself. This saddens me immeasurably.
This book made me interested in competitive horseback riding and to a lesser extent horse heroin. Yeah.
Profile Image for Jackie McMillan.
448 reviews26 followers
November 29, 2019
A visceral novel that draws you kicking & screaming into the world of competition show jumping where the only things more doped up than the horses are the riders. Painful, erotic, twisted and violent - left me with an indelible memory that has persisted for years. Sad the author is gone, because if this is her first novel, I would have loved to see what her tenth one looked like.
3 reviews2 followers
August 14, 2008
Insane coming of age novel about incest, horsebackriding, and heroin.
Profile Image for Veronica Olivo.
3 reviews
June 25, 2009
Man I have read this book at least 5 times!! I love it! It is a crazy look into head games, sex, and horses!!!
1 review2 followers
October 25, 2022
This book is incredibly hard to get through not just because of the graphic violence and abuse, but because of the very real emotional fallout of the abuse. The main character, Lee, not only suffers brutal abuse from the adults who are supposed to protect her (many of them are also enabling it) but her narration reveals that she feels like it’s something about HER, that it’s her fault, which is gut wrenching.
Her girlfriend, Tory, is also very obviously a victim. Another thing that killed me was that under different circumstances these characters could be so happy, they could heal each other and be happy young lesbians in love, but they’ve experienced so much trauma that the only way they can interact with each other is through violent sex and drugs. It’s got the hopelessness of a true tragedy, to the point that you almost become accustomed to the tragedy by the end of the book and you’ve gotten comfortable with the fact that there’s just about no hope for these characters.
The book also shows us a network of adults who are too interested in passing judgement and making money to care about the treatment of the horses and riders, and women’s reputations take a much bigger hit than their male peers who are doing just as much (usually more) depraved stuff. This all adds up to a perfect storm for poor Lee to get trapped in an unsafe dynamic, even without the copious drugs she’s being given.
The abuse of the riders is mirrored by the abuse of the horses, which gets more upsetting until the climax when everything comes to a head, and probably the last bit of comfort for the main characters gets destroyed.
This book has a lot to say and gives you a lot to think about, and the characters were incredibly well written in a way that worked for a story like this. It’s real and brutal and upsetting as hell without relishing in its characters’ suffering, and it’s worth a read if you can stomach it.
Profile Image for Recynd.
236 reviews27 followers
October 30, 2022
**NOTE: I didn’t include any plot spoilers, but if you’re a “less I know the better” kind of reader, I would wait to read any further.**

I won’t bother with a recap; instead, I’ll just note my impressions.

I wish there was far more character development: who are these people? How did they become the way they were? I wanted to know Tori’s backstory, and far more about Linda and Carl. Were they all trauma-bonded? Was Linda truly psychopathic? Why did the author bother including Tim (such a tease!)?

I know about drugs: with what they were using, the ONLY way was down, and fast (ie: dead). It didn’t make sense that Linda let the girls use so much; she could have been FAR more controlling with it—and it seems like she would have been. With opiate addiction comes withdrawal—hand-in-hand: we didn’t see much of that.

The entire story—while compelling—left me feeling empty and kind of confused. The sex was clearly perverse, but…what the hell? Was it an alternate form of cutting (which was all the rage when the book was written)? I could hardly tell what was even happening most of the time, except it involved a whole lot of fists/hands and violence, and it hurt (so good?). It certainly wasn’t erotic in any way. Nobody seemed to LIKE each other—where did the perverted sexual “need” come from?

While I had sympathy for Lee (did anyone ever figure out she was only 15?), I didn’t really understand her motivations. I know two or three (now grown) women whose fathers “interfered” with them in ways in which they will never recover: none of them were quite as damaged as anyone in the book.

The novel was indeed dark, bleak, and disturbing, reminding me in some ways of Von Trier’s “Nymphomaniac Vols. 1 & 2”. Not one I would ever recommend, but I’m glad I read it.
83 reviews
November 19, 2025
This is a very good read. It has some parts that may turn your stomach, though.

I've never read work that plays so raw and realistically as Heather Lewis's work.

I read her novel "Notice" first. It bugs me that the two aren't related when so much of the two stories share plot points that seem like they would be connected. But instead the characters have different names.

Where as "Notice" had much more description during the sexual abuse, "House Rules" actually had more description with the drug abuse.

Very cringy. Very realistic. Down right scare psychological thriller/horror

I just wish Lee were a stronger character. Though she is the narrator and main character, she almost seems to fade in the background. She has the least amount of dialogue in the book, or at least that is TOLD in the book. Heather Lewis also did this with "Nina" the main character from "Notice".

So very very sad that Heather Lewis writes so much from her influenced past.
Profile Image for nina .
15 reviews
April 25, 2024
There is much to be said for Heather Lewis’s unflinching writing about control and pain but what stunned me the most about this book was what it asks about our relationship with animals. The image of the fox head bleeding out on Lee’s lap will stick with me for a long time.
Profile Image for Samantha.
145 reviews
Read
October 11, 2025
phenomenal. propulsive prose, that reads so directly like the thoughts and feelings of a 15 year old. the halting nature of it, the cyclical logic, etc.

felt this book very deeply. lee’s fears and wants are so interesting. said oh my god man times reading this.
Profile Image for Sara Gerot.
436 reviews5 followers
December 14, 2018
This is not a book for the faint of heart. Truly a grueling book about a teenage girl that lives a life of pain, partying, and work right at the margins of privilege. A harrowing story.
Profile Image for Willow.
119 reviews37 followers
December 29, 2022
unrelentingly bleak. needed a tighter edit too. but some of it really really got under my skin in a powerful way.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 47 reviews

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