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Four Things Women Want from a Man
After decades of preaching, teaching, and counseling, influential Christian leader A.R. Bernard reveals the four qualities women want in a man—qualities that contribute to a satisfying and happy relationship.As a longtime pastor of a big-city church, A.R. Bernard has witnessed couples in every stage of life. He’s been with them as they experienced dizzying joys, unspeakable tragedies, and everything in between. As men and women have come to Bernard for spiritual counseling and advice, he’s learned patterns of behavior that are repeated time and again. After almost four decades of preaching, teaching, and counseling, he’s seen that while every situation is unique, people’s behaviors and consequences are amazingly consistent. With this in mind, Bernard has developed a simple system for understanding how couples relate to each other. Maturity, decisiveness, consistency, and strength—these are the four things women want and need most from a man. In his book, Bernard teaches readers how to identify and cultivate these traits toward a happy and long-lasting relationship—one built to weather any storm.
209 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 3, 2016
182 people are currently reading
735 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
September 30, 2018
I first heard of Pastor A.R. Bernard while listening to Aunt Oprah's Super Soul podcast. I listened intensely as he discussed what women really want from men. It was so good and a breath of fresh air to hear his take, especially as a single woman who is exhausted with dating. Fast forward a year and I finally got the book from the library. The first thing I notice is an endorsement from Uncle Denzel and Aunt Pauletta (The Washingtons). Of course, I'm even more intrigued and ready to read.
"Four Things Women Want from a Man" seems to be written for women but packaged for men. As a pastor, Bernard uses the Word of God to support his ideas and theories. Therefore, if you're not rocking with Team Jesus, then you may not want to get this book. However, I feel that any man and woman can learn from the roadmap that he clearly laid out for us. Besides, who doesn't need to possess the qualities of maturity, decisiveness, consistency and strength? And, who doesn't need to actively exercise these qualities on a daily?
After reading this book in two days, I found it refreshing that Bernard was straight to the point. He stated his viewpoint, backed it with the Word of God and left the fluff in the pillows. This book is for Christian women who desire to marry Christian men who we can trust, depend on, love on and show up for. More so, this book is for men who desire to tap into their God-given innate gifts and be the man who God created you to be; in His image.
Bernard doesn't beat you over the head preaching fire and brimstone. He just states the facts as he finds them and then supports it with scripture. At the end of each chapter, there are questions for the man and woman to answer along with a prayer for each gender. Additionally, this book is a great tool for married couples who are new to marriage, those seeking to grow a closer bond in your relationship, those yearning for a better understanding of the opposite sex or to just scrap the things of the past and start anew...
In closing, this books really helped me to solidify that I'm not seeking or asking for too much as I wait for the man who will follow and honor God, while loving, leading and cherishing me and our family. And, if a man thinks that I'm asking for too much, Pastor Bernard confirmed that he ain't the one. I'm definitely ordering a copy of this book for my library and I can't wait to read it with my husband to ensure that we keep God, each other and our family in clear view as we grow together.
"Four Things Women Want from a Man" seems to be written for women but packaged for men. As a pastor, Bernard uses the Word of God to support his ideas and theories. Therefore, if you're not rocking with Team Jesus, then you may not want to get this book. However, I feel that any man and woman can learn from the roadmap that he clearly laid out for us. Besides, who doesn't need to possess the qualities of maturity, decisiveness, consistency and strength? And, who doesn't need to actively exercise these qualities on a daily?
After reading this book in two days, I found it refreshing that Bernard was straight to the point. He stated his viewpoint, backed it with the Word of God and left the fluff in the pillows. This book is for Christian women who desire to marry Christian men who we can trust, depend on, love on and show up for. More so, this book is for men who desire to tap into their God-given innate gifts and be the man who God created you to be; in His image.
Bernard doesn't beat you over the head preaching fire and brimstone. He just states the facts as he finds them and then supports it with scripture. At the end of each chapter, there are questions for the man and woman to answer along with a prayer for each gender. Additionally, this book is a great tool for married couples who are new to marriage, those seeking to grow a closer bond in your relationship, those yearning for a better understanding of the opposite sex or to just scrap the things of the past and start anew...
In closing, this books really helped me to solidify that I'm not seeking or asking for too much as I wait for the man who will follow and honor God, while loving, leading and cherishing me and our family. And, if a man thinks that I'm asking for too much, Pastor Bernard confirmed that he ain't the one. I'm definitely ordering a copy of this book for my library and I can't wait to read it with my husband to ensure that we keep God, each other and our family in clear view as we grow together.
June 10, 2016
Four things that God wants from a man, four things that a woman wants from a man and four things that a man struggle with in life and those four things are : maturity, decisiveness, consistency, and strenght.
December 4, 2017
A deep and profound book
This is a much needed book in the world today. So many women are hurt and abused by men in their relationships. Many men have no clue as to how they are to treat a women in their relationship. This book gives a step by step overview on how you should be acting and what you should be doing. I was happy to read this book and find that yes finally a prominent man in this world who can profoundly explain what a woman really wants and needs from a man.
This is a much needed book in the world today. So many women are hurt and abused by men in their relationships. Many men have no clue as to how they are to treat a women in their relationship. This book gives a step by step overview on how you should be acting and what you should be doing. I was happy to read this book and find that yes finally a prominent man in this world who can profoundly explain what a woman really wants and needs from a man.
May 7, 2016
Loved it.
Self help is not my go to genre I've read a few from Iyanla, Joel Osteen, even pastor (happiness is a way of life) but this was by far my favorite. It was a quick read, filled with helpful information and kept my interest from start to finish. I'm not married but I hope to be and this book provides a very sobering/realistic view of the institution. I loved the personal stories from pastor and the women it help in visualizing the outcome when these principles or lack there of were applied. The four traits are also very appropriate for women and I feel equipped with some useful tools to help improve my daily living.
Self help is not my go to genre I've read a few from Iyanla, Joel Osteen, even pastor (happiness is a way of life) but this was by far my favorite. It was a quick read, filled with helpful information and kept my interest from start to finish. I'm not married but I hope to be and this book provides a very sobering/realistic view of the institution. I loved the personal stories from pastor and the women it help in visualizing the outcome when these principles or lack there of were applied. The four traits are also very appropriate for women and I feel equipped with some useful tools to help improve my daily living.
September 3, 2018
I can’t in good conscience not write a review of this book as potential readers deserve to know how misleading the cover, inside flap summary and title of this tome are. Nowhere in these three places (unless my library stamp covered it) is the reader informed this will be a preaching book about God/faith with very little to do with much else. It’s also a very sexist book - each chapter ends with a prayer - one for men and one for women in which the male prayer is about finding strength to be decisive or some such, and the female prayer is help me support my husband in this endeavor. A horrible book with a very misleading title.
May 13, 2016
I will be writing and posting my review on my blog next week.
May 31, 2018
It is a simple book that can be finished within a few hours. Yet ofter an insight that useful for a lifetime!
The book first describe the evolution of marriage throughout the time. The evolution from the need for security later become the need for love, and the latest is the need for self-actualization. And this is why marriage falls apart, since each member seeks for personal exploration instead of holding up the partnership.
The book ofter a strategy for a marriage to work. The strategy is specifically for men which also important for woman to know. That is men need:
- Maturity
- Decisiveness
- Consistency
- Strength
The other thing that I found useful in this book are:
- Change is necessary for maturity. It is not an event, but a constant change to continue to adapt (major) and adjust (tweaks) in order to keep up with the change.
- Time and money are human’s most valuable resources. By reviewing where we spent those resources on, we will get an idea on where we are actually headed. This is a very clever concept to audit our life.
I recommended this book wholeheartedly . Thank you A.R. Bernard for a very insightful wisdom that delivered nicely.
The book first describe the evolution of marriage throughout the time. The evolution from the need for security later become the need for love, and the latest is the need for self-actualization. And this is why marriage falls apart, since each member seeks for personal exploration instead of holding up the partnership.
The book ofter a strategy for a marriage to work. The strategy is specifically for men which also important for woman to know. That is men need:
- Maturity
- Decisiveness
- Consistency
- Strength
The other thing that I found useful in this book are:
- Change is necessary for maturity. It is not an event, but a constant change to continue to adapt (major) and adjust (tweaks) in order to keep up with the change.
- Time and money are human’s most valuable resources. By reviewing where we spent those resources on, we will get an idea on where we are actually headed. This is a very clever concept to audit our life.
I recommended this book wholeheartedly . Thank you A.R. Bernard for a very insightful wisdom that delivered nicely.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 17, 2019
So grateful hubby was willing to read this with me...healing. Learned about this book from watching Super Soul Sunday. Even though this book referred to what I want, I am thankful to God my husband remained open to challenging himself to grow, and then he did so. He began to put what he was learning into practice. Great book to give a wife the language she needs to communicate her needs, in a loving and respectful way, to her husband. I would encourage couples to read together.
December 30, 2017
Simple and to the point.
This book has helped me find the words that had always been at the tip of my tounge amd the top of my list. The author is right about alot of the characteristics of women and how they relate to how we relate to men. I waited through 3 long term relationships to see these traits. Now he has to come built with them or keep ot movin’!!
This book has helped me find the words that had always been at the tip of my tounge amd the top of my list. The author is right about alot of the characteristics of women and how they relate to how we relate to men. I waited through 3 long term relationships to see these traits. Now he has to come built with them or keep ot movin’!!
January 9, 2021
I don't necessarily agree with everything said in the book, primarily because the author and I have a different perspective on the degree to which men and women are "equal" in this world.
However, I did find some wisdom in the book, and I do agree with the main messages the author is trying to convey. Overall, it was quite enjoyable!
However, I did find some wisdom in the book, and I do agree with the main messages the author is trying to convey. Overall, it was quite enjoyable!
March 12, 2017
Fabulous and straight to the point. details are So GOOD We Can Know How TO STUDY OuR LIVES TO Be Able To change.
I am applying these words of wisdom as a woman to my own life. They are pearls, too rich and real to just leave them to the guys . Thank you Pastor.
I am applying these words of wisdom as a woman to my own life. They are pearls, too rich and real to just leave them to the guys . Thank you Pastor.
July 4, 2017
Excellent...
Practical suggestions for a new design of living. Key points: Awareness, understanding and application. An easy read with practical instruction and direction. Rich in wisdom and insight.
Practical suggestions for a new design of living. Key points: Awareness, understanding and application. An easy read with practical instruction and direction. Rich in wisdom and insight.
December 22, 2018
This book should be right up there with “The Five Love Languages” as a book couples should read together and discuss. Even if you’re not married or in a relationship, I think it gives men and women tools and insight into understanding the opposite sex better.
March 3, 2019
I had seen Pastor Bernard on Oprah and couldn't wait to get into the book.
As a widow, I was intrigued by the title. The book offers truth and wisdom to both men and women of all ages.
As a widow, I was intrigued by the title. The book offers truth and wisdom to both men and women of all ages.
January 7, 2022
God wants us to be mature, decisive, consistency, and strength of character. And a woman wants a man to be responsible and stand behind what he says. Today's world is a battle in our mind that takes us away from the right path. And this book teaches how to find it.
July 31, 2018
Great book. Easy read.
Figure out your assets and liabilities and you will be good
Figure out your assets and liabilities and you will be good
October 6, 2018
Excellent Read
November 2, 2018
Great book for both men and women
I love the four principles in the book! If your looking for relationship this a blueprint for women to find a good man.
I love the four principles in the book! If your looking for relationship this a blueprint for women to find a good man.
January 11, 2020
Great And Easy Read
Good book to read and easy to comprehend.
Very insightful and straight to the point for the information that’s provided
Good book to read and easy to comprehend.
Very insightful and straight to the point for the information that’s provided
August 10, 2020
Amazing book!!
Great tips! Very insightful and easy to understand. This is a must read for singles, engaged and married individuals. I recommend this book!
Great tips! Very insightful and easy to understand. This is a must read for singles, engaged and married individuals. I recommend this book!
July 25, 2021
Well written guide to healthy, long lasting relationships!
November 24, 2021
Don't read this book if you're also questioning your faith like we were. It's a fun journey otherwise and good to do as a couple with each chapter ending with questions for both parties.
July 17, 2022
Quick and easy read. A lot of gems. Would recommend for novice reader but a bit too rudimentary for me.
August 10, 2023
This book was ok. A beginning discussion for a man and woman to work on communication.
October 9, 2024
Very helpful and straightforward.
August 2, 2025
Great Read
Book is pack full of practical and useful guidance on perspectives of being a man. Well worth the time to read.
Book is pack full of practical and useful guidance on perspectives of being a man. Well worth the time to read.
October 9, 2016
I thoroughly enjoy reading works on relationships and understanding men and women. I also seek to apply God in my daily life, and this book combines the two. I truly believe relationships that are centered around God are fortified and is what they should be predicated on. Bernard wants us to focus on Gods plan for our lives and relationships as opposed to society's view of how it " should be" . We all know that society's culture and " rules" continues to fluctuate, but God never wavers.
One vital piece of information I will take with me, is the correlation between Adam and his helpmate in the Bible, and men and women here on earth. God, after having Adam work in the Garden, told him he would give him a " helpmate". Since then, women are partially designed to HELP our men. Be it advice,suggestions, etc. Men have an extreme *control detector* and unfortunately, at times, confuse the two. I will take this clarification with me, and share it amongst my peers. This is not to say that women can forever go on nagging about petty details and call themselves helpmates. But this should shed some light, that maybe, just maybe, when your woman does give you advice and is helping you, that that is just what she was designed to do, by God.
One vital piece of information I will take with me, is the correlation between Adam and his helpmate in the Bible, and men and women here on earth. God, after having Adam work in the Garden, told him he would give him a " helpmate". Since then, women are partially designed to HELP our men. Be it advice,suggestions, etc. Men have an extreme *control detector* and unfortunately, at times, confuse the two. I will take this clarification with me, and share it amongst my peers. This is not to say that women can forever go on nagging about petty details and call themselves helpmates. But this should shed some light, that maybe, just maybe, when your woman does give you advice and is helping you, that that is just what she was designed to do, by God.
June 8, 2016
I won this book in a Goodreads Giveaway and feel blessed and extremely fortunate to have done so. Despite my being married for 33 years as of this month, I found so much in this little book that will enrich my marriage and improve our relationship, it completely surprised me; I feel so grateful to Pastor A. R. Bernard for writing this insightful book. It is very quick reading but profound. At the same time, it is full of biblical principles that can be applied immediately.
I plan to share this book with my husband after which we are sure to have many long and rewarding conversations. Then, I plan to turn it over to my newly married son and daughter-in-law for their own enrichment. After that, my soon to be married daughter and future son-in-law will be gifted this little treasure. If you are someone who seeks to improve your relationship, this is a book that will not let you down. Four Things Women Want from a Man is for all men and women who want to go the distance in a happy, loving relationship.
I plan to share this book with my husband after which we are sure to have many long and rewarding conversations. Then, I plan to turn it over to my newly married son and daughter-in-law for their own enrichment. After that, my soon to be married daughter and future son-in-law will be gifted this little treasure. If you are someone who seeks to improve your relationship, this is a book that will not let you down. Four Things Women Want from a Man is for all men and women who want to go the distance in a happy, loving relationship.
January 15, 2017
Pastor Bernard snatched my edges. I enjoyed this book and learned a great deal, not just about being in a relationship, but also about myself. If you are looking to improve your relationship or need guidance and advice on what to look for in your next relationship, look no futher than this book.
November 5, 2021
This is a book EVERY WOMAN should READ before making a commitment and it will help you to not settle for anything less. Remember this written by a Minister of GOD. He has counsel thousands of couples. Therefore I think he knows what he is writing about. This is a must read!! Signed Jag Mom
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews