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No More Homework! No More Tests!: Kids' Favorite Funny School Poems
No More Homework! No More Tests! includes the funniest poems about school ever collected in one book. These hilarious poems were written by a number of poets, including Shel Silverstein, Jack Prelutsky, David L. Harrison, Colin McNaughton, Carol Diggory Shields, Kalli Dakos, and Bruce Lansky. Sillier than a teacher with hiccups, funnier than toilet paper stuck to the bottom of the principal’s shoe, it is certain to have readers laughing by the first page. This book puts the cool back in school and makes students WANT to write and read poetry.
80 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 1997
12 people are currently reading
112 people want to read
About the author
Bruce Lansky
198 books49 followersI was born on June 1, 1941. My first home was an apartment in Manhattan's Upper West Side, a neighborhood that overlooked the George Washington Bridge. Soon after kindergarten, my family moved to Scarsdale, which seemed to be “in the country.” In high school, I broke my ankle when I went out for the lacrosse team, so I wrote a sports column for the school newspaper. I don't think I showed any particular talent for writing then.
I went to St. John's College in Annapolis, Maryland. I actually learned to read Greek (I didn't understand it, though). I transferred from St. John's to New York University, so I could study political science and economics. I graduated with a major in philosophy and a minor in English. My first job was a market researcher for a beer company in New Jersey. Over the next five years, I switched jobs several times: advertising copywriter, advertising account executive, and marketing manager at a candy company.
I married Vicki and we had a baby, Douglas. I wanted him to have a home surrounded by grass and trees and ball fields, so I accepted a job in Minnesota, and Doug got a baby sister, Dana. What rescued me from poverty was that my wife and some other mothers wrote a cookbook. We published it ourselves, and it was a huge hit. That's how I figured out that I wanted to be a publisher when I grew up. We built Meadowbrook Press, and I became an author of baby name books and humor books for adults.
Ten years ago, I wanted to put together a children's book of all the poems they loved best. To find these poems, I tested poems in elementary schools. As I was testing poems on children, I decided to write a few to see what the response would be. At first it wasn't that good, but as my writing improved, I added my poems to new books. To get them just right, I'd rewrite them over and over. I've now edited six poetry anthologies and filled three books with my own poems. Because I spent a lot of time reading and testing poems in classrooms, schools started inviting me to perform. I've now performed at hundreds of schools. My goal to put on the most entertaining, most educational, and most motivating assembly a school has ever had. My web site, http://www.gigglepoetry.com, helps kids discover the fun of reading and writing poetry.
Language arts are a very important part of what you learn in school. You can read great books that take you to far-away lands. You can write your own stories and make yourself the hero of exciting adventures. Even if it seems hard sometimes, don't give up. Keep practicing your reading and writing skills, and soon it will become easier. There are so many wonderful worlds to explore in books and poetry. Get your very own passport by learning to read and write the very best that you can.
I went to St. John's College in Annapolis, Maryland. I actually learned to read Greek (I didn't understand it, though). I transferred from St. John's to New York University, so I could study political science and economics. I graduated with a major in philosophy and a minor in English. My first job was a market researcher for a beer company in New Jersey. Over the next five years, I switched jobs several times: advertising copywriter, advertising account executive, and marketing manager at a candy company.
I married Vicki and we had a baby, Douglas. I wanted him to have a home surrounded by grass and trees and ball fields, so I accepted a job in Minnesota, and Doug got a baby sister, Dana. What rescued me from poverty was that my wife and some other mothers wrote a cookbook. We published it ourselves, and it was a huge hit. That's how I figured out that I wanted to be a publisher when I grew up. We built Meadowbrook Press, and I became an author of baby name books and humor books for adults.
Ten years ago, I wanted to put together a children's book of all the poems they loved best. To find these poems, I tested poems in elementary schools. As I was testing poems on children, I decided to write a few to see what the response would be. At first it wasn't that good, but as my writing improved, I added my poems to new books. To get them just right, I'd rewrite them over and over. I've now edited six poetry anthologies and filled three books with my own poems. Because I spent a lot of time reading and testing poems in classrooms, schools started inviting me to perform. I've now performed at hundreds of schools. My goal to put on the most entertaining, most educational, and most motivating assembly a school has ever had. My web site, http://www.gigglepoetry.com, helps kids discover the fun of reading and writing poetry.
Language arts are a very important part of what you learn in school. You can read great books that take you to far-away lands. You can write your own stories and make yourself the hero of exciting adventures. Even if it seems hard sometimes, don't give up. Keep practicing your reading and writing skills, and soon it will become easier. There are so many wonderful worlds to explore in books and poetry. Get your very own passport by learning to read and write the very best that you can.
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Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
December 1, 2011
The book that i finished reading is called "No More Homework,No More Tests" and the author is Bruce Lansky and it is a poetry book. So while i was reading it there was this one part when there was this boy who seemed that this girl liked him but she really didn't and the poem went like this "When ever she hits me i know by heart that she really does like me". After that there was this one more poem that was about how this boy was sleeping and he was dreaming about tomorrow which was the first day of school and he thought how the teachers would yell at him and the lunch lady would kill him because of her most disgusting school lunch. This book is mostly about how the kids say that they don't like the teachers,lunch lady,principals, ans so much more people who are in the school. This book is not just any ordinary poem book this is a super funny book because while i was reading all of the poems they all made me laugh and there punctuation is really good and same goes for the dialogue and rest of the book is spectacular. Trust me when you finish reading this book it will teach you something and that will teach how to write good poetry and how to write a even more funnier poem. It tells you that they don't won't want to go to school brcause half of these poems are about how they really scared about going to school and tells me that school is not really there favorite thing in there life. I rate this book five stars and so should you because it is all plain funny poems and they teach you a lesson about how there school is crazy and they hate school like it is there worst nightmare which it is. If he buy this book and finish it keep for ever until you die because it will be a a book that will make your frown turn upside down and make you laugh all day. So that is all i have to say about this book so do not throw away this book and remember do not give this book to any one in this whole entire world.
May 4, 2021
No More Homework! No More Test! Is a literary collection of funny kid’s poems written by various prominent poets about elementary school children on their perspective of a school day, such as, daily announcements, their accomplishments and lunch time. Most of the poems are pleasing, amusing, and are easy to comprehend. The illustration of the front cover is very inviting, with bold colors of graphic designs of events that take place in a classroom by children. I love the dialect, and the illustrations are detailed to reflect the subject matter. I rate this book a 5/5 because it’s entertaining and appropriate for school age children, but I would recommend this book for all ages even adults. I would suggest utilizing this book of poems for a children amateur poetry book club for independent reading or as a group.
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December 7, 2018This book is a collection of hysterical poems by a variety of notable authors. The poems cover everything from the horrors of the first day of school, to having lettuce stuck in your tooth and toilet paper stuck to your shoe. The poems are short, humorous, and relatable to kids and adults alike. One of my favorites is “Recess”. “Suzy banged her elbow, Samantha skinned her knee, Jamie tore her sweatshirt, Inez fell from a tree, Harry got a bee sting, and Aaron ran away. Now you know why schools have just one recess a day.” This book is a great way to introduce students to a unit on writing poetry and would pair well with Where the Sidewalk Ends, by Shel Silverstein.
April 15, 2020
So, I had bought this book YEARS ago, as a kid, and it brings so much nostalgia! There are so many poems here that I reference in every day life ("There are so many things to do/when homework must be done," for instance). I REALLY wish we hadn't gotten rid of this book, as I would love to buy it again.
Anyway, I REALLY recommend it!
NOTE: I even won a poetry reading competition in 6th Grade for "I cannot go to school today... said Little Peggy Anne McKay." (that's not the title, just the first line of the poem). I love it, and I think you'll kids will love it too, in light of the Pandemic. No more Homework! No more tests!
Anyway, I REALLY recommend it!
NOTE: I even won a poetry reading competition in 6th Grade for "I cannot go to school today... said Little Peggy Anne McKay." (that's not the title, just the first line of the poem). I love it, and I think you'll kids will love it too, in light of the Pandemic. No more Homework! No more tests!
July 5, 2022
So, I had bought this book YEARS ago, as a kid, and it brings so much nostalgia! There are so many poems here that I reference in every day life ("There are so many things to do/when homework must be done," for instance). I REALLY wish we hadn't gotten rid of this book, as I would love to buy it again.
Anyway, I REALLY recommend it!
NOTE: I even won a poetry reading competition in 6th Grade for "I cannot go to school today... said Little Peggy Anne McKay." (that's not the title, just the first line of the poem). I love it, and I think you'll kids will love it too, in light of the Pandemic. No more Homework! No more tests!
Anyway, I REALLY recommend it!
NOTE: I even won a poetry reading competition in 6th Grade for "I cannot go to school today... said Little Peggy Anne McKay." (that's not the title, just the first line of the poem). I love it, and I think you'll kids will love it too, in light of the Pandemic. No more Homework! No more tests!
March 26, 2024
No More Homework! No More Tests!: Kids' Gavorite Funny School Poems is one of the books I carried when I was a substitute teacher during the time I worked in a school system with all year school and I worked as a sub on my off time. It is full of funny and rediculous poems that elementary age children loved. It was very good at getting their attention, especial 4th through 6th grades.
Now that I'm retired, I'm passing it along to a teacher friend that is still teaching 4th grade.
Now that I'm retired, I'm passing it along to a teacher friend that is still teaching 4th grade.
October 17, 2016
1. no awards.
2. 1st-2nd
3. This is a book filled with funny poems about how children view their school. There is stories of how students feel about teachers, lunch ladies etc. The funny poems relate directly with the students and make them laugh.
4. I loved this book, the poems throughout it can relate to elementary children . The Mystery meat that is served in the cafeteria is mentioned which I loved. Even as an adult these will still funny because everyone has experienced it.
5. This can allow the children to get their laughs out, along with how they feel about their school, and people in it. You can use it to start off the weeks each week reading a funny poem to get the class loosened up.
2. 1st-2nd
3. This is a book filled with funny poems about how children view their school. There is stories of how students feel about teachers, lunch ladies etc. The funny poems relate directly with the students and make them laugh.
4. I loved this book, the poems throughout it can relate to elementary children . The Mystery meat that is served in the cafeteria is mentioned which I loved. Even as an adult these will still funny because everyone has experienced it.
5. This can allow the children to get their laughs out, along with how they feel about their school, and people in it. You can use it to start off the weeks each week reading a funny poem to get the class loosened up.
November 30, 2018
2010. Poetry. This book is a compilation of school-related poems! Most are funny, but they are all very engaging. Great way to get students reading and analyzing poems. Could be used for a "poem of the day" activity when students first arrive at school.
November 16, 2017
I did a project over Bruce Lansky and I am so glad that it introduced me to his work. His poems are interesting and hilarious for everyone! Definitely one of my favorites!
September 15, 2018
This was fine. Some poems were better than others. Lots of school stereotypes that kids might like, but as a teacher I’m kinda over them. :)
May 18, 2020
I read this for poetry so i can add a book for language arts and i did not enjoy it too well. I like poetry but not kids poetry.
January 3, 2021
I love teaching Poetry to children, and this book is always popular.
April 19, 2016
Title: No More homework! No More Tests!
Author: Bruce Lansky
Illustrator: Stephen Carpenter
Genre: Poetry Book
Theme(s): School
Opening line/sentence: The witches mumble horrid chants, you’re scolded by five thousand aunts, a Martian pulls a fearsome face and hurls you into outer space, You’re tired in from of whistling trains, a tomahawk has sliced your brains, the tigers snarl, the giants roar, you’re sat on by a dinosaur.
Brief Book Summary: This book is filled of funny poems to make young children laugh. The poems are all school related making it more interesting for the children to want to read. The first poem of this book is about the teacher being a witch.
Professional Recommendation/Review #1: Kathleen Squires (Booklist, September 15, 1997 (Vol. 94, No. 2))
Imagine a teacher's pet who bites! Or a cafeteria-eating monster! Or a pencil-inhaling classmate! Lansky presents these humorous images and more in 52 silly school poems, including favorites by Shel Silverstein and Jack Prelutsky, as well as many of Lansky's own. Themes such as the first day of school, homework, school lunches, and embarrassing moments hold wide appeal, and even the most reluctant readers will get caught up in the mix of fun. Some of the rhymes can be sung to popular tunes, and some are "interactive": readers can insert the names of their teachers or friends in the blanks. Stephen Carpenter's wacky, energetic illustrations are as amusing as the poems, making this accessible collection not only useful in encouraging youngsters to try their hands at poetry but also guaranteed to elicit laughs when read alone or aloud to a class. Category: Middle Readers. 1997, Meadowbrook, $8. Gr. 2-6.
(PUBLISHER: Meadowbrook Press ;Distributed by Simon & Schuster (Minnetonka MN:) (New York:), PUBLISHED: c1997.)
Professional Recommendation/Review #2: Carolyn Mott Ford (Children's Literature)
These are poems meant to give kids the giggles, and they do not disappoint. Children helped by picking out favorite poems, so cafeteria food, missing homework and jokes on teacher are all popular subjects. One or two of the poems are suitably gross. Bruce Lansky wrote many, but other poets including Jack Prelutsky, Bobbi Katz and wonderful Shel Silverstein are also represented. 1997, Meadowbrook Press, $8.00. Ages 7 to 12.
(PUBLISHER: Meadowbrook Press ;Distributed by Simon & Schuster (Minnetonka MN:) (New York:), PUBLISHED: c1997.)
Response to Two Professional Reviews: Both of these reviews talk about how funny the poems are that are included in this book. The first review gives you a scenario asking you how you would feel in that situation. The second review talks more about what the general topics of the stories are.
Evaluation of Literary Elements: This would be a good book to teach young children about poetry, especially how to write funny poems. I think that children who like to read poems would really enjoy this book, as it is a fast read but it is also made up of funny poems about different things that students can do on a daily basis.
Consideration of Instructional Application: I would use this book to teach the children about poems. I would first read the children a couple of funny poems out of the book, especially ones that relate to their classroom and what is taking place at that point in time. After that is done I will introduce to the students how to write a poem, also what needs to be included into a poem.
Author: Bruce Lansky
Illustrator: Stephen Carpenter
Genre: Poetry Book
Theme(s): School
Opening line/sentence: The witches mumble horrid chants, you’re scolded by five thousand aunts, a Martian pulls a fearsome face and hurls you into outer space, You’re tired in from of whistling trains, a tomahawk has sliced your brains, the tigers snarl, the giants roar, you’re sat on by a dinosaur.
Brief Book Summary: This book is filled of funny poems to make young children laugh. The poems are all school related making it more interesting for the children to want to read. The first poem of this book is about the teacher being a witch.
Professional Recommendation/Review #1: Kathleen Squires (Booklist, September 15, 1997 (Vol. 94, No. 2))
Imagine a teacher's pet who bites! Or a cafeteria-eating monster! Or a pencil-inhaling classmate! Lansky presents these humorous images and more in 52 silly school poems, including favorites by Shel Silverstein and Jack Prelutsky, as well as many of Lansky's own. Themes such as the first day of school, homework, school lunches, and embarrassing moments hold wide appeal, and even the most reluctant readers will get caught up in the mix of fun. Some of the rhymes can be sung to popular tunes, and some are "interactive": readers can insert the names of their teachers or friends in the blanks. Stephen Carpenter's wacky, energetic illustrations are as amusing as the poems, making this accessible collection not only useful in encouraging youngsters to try their hands at poetry but also guaranteed to elicit laughs when read alone or aloud to a class. Category: Middle Readers. 1997, Meadowbrook, $8. Gr. 2-6.
(PUBLISHER: Meadowbrook Press ;Distributed by Simon & Schuster (Minnetonka MN:) (New York:), PUBLISHED: c1997.)
Professional Recommendation/Review #2: Carolyn Mott Ford (Children's Literature)
These are poems meant to give kids the giggles, and they do not disappoint. Children helped by picking out favorite poems, so cafeteria food, missing homework and jokes on teacher are all popular subjects. One or two of the poems are suitably gross. Bruce Lansky wrote many, but other poets including Jack Prelutsky, Bobbi Katz and wonderful Shel Silverstein are also represented. 1997, Meadowbrook Press, $8.00. Ages 7 to 12.
(PUBLISHER: Meadowbrook Press ;Distributed by Simon & Schuster (Minnetonka MN:) (New York:), PUBLISHED: c1997.)
Response to Two Professional Reviews: Both of these reviews talk about how funny the poems are that are included in this book. The first review gives you a scenario asking you how you would feel in that situation. The second review talks more about what the general topics of the stories are.
Evaluation of Literary Elements: This would be a good book to teach young children about poetry, especially how to write funny poems. I think that children who like to read poems would really enjoy this book, as it is a fast read but it is also made up of funny poems about different things that students can do on a daily basis.
Consideration of Instructional Application: I would use this book to teach the children about poems. I would first read the children a couple of funny poems out of the book, especially ones that relate to their classroom and what is taking place at that point in time. After that is done I will introduce to the students how to write a poem, also what needs to be included into a poem.
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April 22, 2018Children Poetry
Poetry can be difficult to understand at a young age, but Bruce Lansky has created a collection of poems that will make poetry relatable and be inviting. The book, No More Homework! No More Tests! Kids Favorite Funny School Poems, is a collection of poems grades appropriate for third to fifth graders. The book is recommended for grades third to fifth, but older age groups may find the book fun to read in their leisure time. The book is a collaboration of various poets who can make a funny connection to school and poetry. One strength of this book is the tone of the poems, students will find poetry hilarious, make personal connections, and want to write poetry themselves. When students read something that connects to their experiences and personal taste, they will enjoy the text just like this book. Another strength of this poetry book would be the imaginative words and activities that connect with young readers. For example, using activities: running over teacher, skateboarding, taking candy bars, and flying paper airplanes. These and many more activities are used in poems and relate to the young readers. One suggestion for this book would be to enlarge the text a bit more as the visuals images overpower the page versus the words. This book is recommended for young readers to read at school, home and with friends. For educators looking for an interactive poetry book that won't be intimidating for young readers, this would be a perfect book.
Poetry can be difficult to understand at a young age, but Bruce Lansky has created a collection of poems that will make poetry relatable and be inviting. The book, No More Homework! No More Tests! Kids Favorite Funny School Poems, is a collection of poems grades appropriate for third to fifth graders. The book is recommended for grades third to fifth, but older age groups may find the book fun to read in their leisure time. The book is a collaboration of various poets who can make a funny connection to school and poetry. One strength of this book is the tone of the poems, students will find poetry hilarious, make personal connections, and want to write poetry themselves. When students read something that connects to their experiences and personal taste, they will enjoy the text just like this book. Another strength of this poetry book would be the imaginative words and activities that connect with young readers. For example, using activities: running over teacher, skateboarding, taking candy bars, and flying paper airplanes. These and many more activities are used in poems and relate to the young readers. One suggestion for this book would be to enlarge the text a bit more as the visuals images overpower the page versus the words. This book is recommended for young readers to read at school, home and with friends. For educators looking for an interactive poetry book that won't be intimidating for young readers, this would be a perfect book.
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February 28, 2016No More Homework! No More Tests! includes the funniest poems about school ever collected in one book. These hilarious poems were written by a number of poets, including Shel Silverstein, Jack Prelutsky, David L. Harrison, Colin McNaughton, Carol Diggory Shields, Kalli Dakos, and Bruce Lansky.
These poems are humorous and students will be able to relate to most of the situations in these poems. I would use these poems in my classroom to help get my students engaged in poetry writing. I think most of the poems in this book could also be used to practice fluency with my students. One of my favorite poem is Norman Norton's Nostrils. This poem could easily be used in a health or science lesson to introduce body parts and the kids will love the gross factor of these poems! I would definitely recommend keeping a copy of this book in your poetry collection!
These poems are humorous and students will be able to relate to most of the situations in these poems. I would use these poems in my classroom to help get my students engaged in poetry writing. I think most of the poems in this book could also be used to practice fluency with my students. One of my favorite poem is Norman Norton's Nostrils. This poem could easily be used in a health or science lesson to introduce body parts and the kids will love the gross factor of these poems! I would definitely recommend keeping a copy of this book in your poetry collection!
April 26, 2016
No more Homework/ No More Test! selected by Bruce Lansky and illustrated Stephan Carpenter is a kids book of poetry about the problems kids face while going to school. This book is intended for ages 5-10. However, I think that all ages will enjoy these poems because everybody attended school at one time in their life and can related to the poems in this book. I rated this book 5 stars because it is funny and it took me back to my days when I was in elementary school. This book contains poems about everyday happenings in school. There are poem about mystery meat Mondays to sick day no school. The illustrations are simple pencil drawings without color but each drawing is an accurate representation of each poem and the drawings makes the poems even funnier. I think this book would appeal to young readers because it is funny and they can relate to many of the poems subjects.
October 29, 2010
I wish !!! well anyway this is a great book full of funny poems about school, a way to add fun into the day.great for book boxes or just it reccomend it ! the title will have students wanting to read it. I loved this book !!! No more home work no more test all A's that is the best ! sorry I got a little carried away ,LOL !!!
March 12, 2013
This is a book of funny school (or anti-school) themed poems. It would be appropriate for upper elementary or possibly even younger middle school students. I could see these poems being used to facilitate poetry writing or reading fluency activities. They would also be cute to memorize for class fluency or a school talent show.
April 8, 2015
I liked this book because it had poems that were fun for children to read and they could relate to. All of these poems were related to school and because they were funny, I can see how a teacher would use it to teach children that poetry can be fun. I would recommend using this book to introduce poetry to the kids. I would also recommend it for grades 3rd and up.
January 3, 2012
If you like poetry then you will enjoy this book.A boy has a dream.he has an alain with a laser, with a wich makeing wheord soup . a monster with 3 big eyes.the Alain ships tell him to keep his elbos of the table.you can fined this book in
September 20, 2015
I really enjoyed this book of poems, they were all so funny! I think that students would enjoy this book because the poems are about school related things like taking tests, missing the bus and much more. This book would be great for students to read individually or together as a class.
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December 5, 2016This book has a collection of the funniest poems about school. This book is a way to get your students more involved in poetry because it's funny enough they will want to read and write poetry.
Grade: K-2
Grade: K-2
February 27, 2012
This a fun kids book. It has witty poems with rhymes and fun stories that most students think about.
April 26, 2014
I really liked this book because it was hysterical. If you like funny school poems this book is definitely for you. I recommend this book for all people.
January 8, 2015
This collection includes some of my favorite school poems. I love being able to share a quick poem with my class before lunch or dismissal. Can be great for transitions as well.
May 13, 2015
This is a really funny poem book about school. If it doesn't make you laugh, then something is really wrong with you.
April 28, 2017
“No More Homework! No More Tests!” is a poem book filled with hilarious poems all about school. Each poem was written by many different poets that included poets Jack Prelutsky, David L. Harrison, Colin McNaughton, Shel Silverstein, Bruce Lansky, Carol Diggory Shields, and Kalli Dakos.
This book is great for older students perhaps from age 7 to late middle school. It is great for students in school because they can relate so much to the poems. The poems are so humorous it would have every kid laughing out loud. There are many gross poems I read which is great for young boys and girls who find anything gross funny. Not only would I recommend this book to kids but I highly would recommend it to teachers because they could use this book to introduce poetry to their class. It will get all the kids attention because it isn’t a boring poetry book.
This book is great for older students perhaps from age 7 to late middle school. It is great for students in school because they can relate so much to the poems. The poems are so humorous it would have every kid laughing out loud. There are many gross poems I read which is great for young boys and girls who find anything gross funny. Not only would I recommend this book to kids but I highly would recommend it to teachers because they could use this book to introduce poetry to their class. It will get all the kids attention because it isn’t a boring poetry book.
Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews