What do you think?
Rate this book
Flying Without a Net
Dani Perez, a secular Israeli working as a software engineer in Boston, has never had trouble balancing his faith and his sexuality—until he meets Avi Levine, a gay Orthodox Jew and sign language interpreter. As they fall in love, Dani finds himself wanting Avi in his life but confused by Avi’s observance. Dani can’t understand how Avi reconciles what his religion demands with what his body desires. And although he wants to deny it, neither can Avi.
Despite the risk of losing Avi forever to a religious life that objects to their love, Dani supports him through the struggle to find an answer. Will they be able to start a life together despite religious ideology that conflicts with the relationship they are trying to build?
Despite the risk of losing Avi forever to a religious life that objects to their love, Dani supports him through the struggle to find an answer. Will they be able to start a life together despite religious ideology that conflicts with the relationship they are trying to build?
208 pages, Paperback
First published November 17, 2016
2 people are currently reading
340 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
November 25, 2016
Reviewed for From Top to Bottom Reviews.
A copy of this book was provided by the publisher.
So sweet and beautiful. There's really no other words to describe Flying Without a Net but sweet and beautiful and just.. everything!
You know that moment, when you have this premonition that a book will be "something" the moment you first hear of it? And then when you actually read it you find out that the book was not only to be something but turns out to be a gem? This is what Flying Without a Net was for me.
I loved Avi and Dani from the first page on. From the first time they meet I was enchanted by them and could only follow them all spellbound along on their journey. And what a ride it was. Don't get me wrong, there's no action in this story, it's not fast-paced and filled with twists an turns. Quite the opposite, this one is a steady-flowing river, pulling you along and not letting you go.
There's no one thing I can exactly pinpoint and say "that pulled me in". I just fell in love with the complexity of the story. I loved the diverse cast of characters, the rich culture and traditions, I loved the chemistry between Avi and Dani and the slow development of their relationship. It was so, so beautiful to see them build a friendship and then fall in love. And I treasured how they navigated their relationship together.
I especially loved how Dani is so careful to not go past Avi's boundaries. He respects them unconditionally and doesn't act in any way to try to push Avi. Dani waits for Avi to signal that he's ready and okay to take the next step. In a way this was so cute and felt innocent like teenagers who are in love for the first time although both MC's are in their 30s.
Their first kiss legit had me swooning because it's just so beautiful and *flails excitedly*.
I'm not a religious person, and usually I don't read books that have a strong religious aspect because I'm worried they might feel preachy, but the religious part of Flying Without a Net is just so natural and, although a big part of the story, it's never too much.
I really loved how this book dealt with navigating sexuality while being deeply religious. The story was so rich and vibrant with their culture and traditions and E.M. Ben Shaul handled each strand of this story perfectly to build this intricately woven, multifaceted blanket. A truly amazing story about love and religion that will stay with me forever. I loved, loved, loved it and highly recommend it. Undoubtedly one of my favorite books this year.
PS: I HAVE TO MENTION THE COVER! I've been good the whole time but just look at it! It's so gorgeous and fits the story perfectly, combining the religious-aspect and the rainbow for Avi's sexuality.
A copy of this book was provided by the publisher.
So sweet and beautiful. There's really no other words to describe Flying Without a Net but sweet and beautiful and just.. everything!
You know that moment, when you have this premonition that a book will be "something" the moment you first hear of it? And then when you actually read it you find out that the book was not only to be something but turns out to be a gem? This is what Flying Without a Net was for me.
I loved Avi and Dani from the first page on. From the first time they meet I was enchanted by them and could only follow them all spellbound along on their journey. And what a ride it was. Don't get me wrong, there's no action in this story, it's not fast-paced and filled with twists an turns. Quite the opposite, this one is a steady-flowing river, pulling you along and not letting you go.
There's no one thing I can exactly pinpoint and say "that pulled me in". I just fell in love with the complexity of the story. I loved the diverse cast of characters, the rich culture and traditions, I loved the chemistry between Avi and Dani and the slow development of their relationship. It was so, so beautiful to see them build a friendship and then fall in love. And I treasured how they navigated their relationship together.
I especially loved how Dani is so careful to not go past Avi's boundaries. He respects them unconditionally and doesn't act in any way to try to push Avi. Dani waits for Avi to signal that he's ready and okay to take the next step. In a way this was so cute and felt innocent like teenagers who are in love for the first time although both MC's are in their 30s.
Their first kiss legit had me swooning because it's just so beautiful and *flails excitedly*.
I'm not a religious person, and usually I don't read books that have a strong religious aspect because I'm worried they might feel preachy, but the religious part of Flying Without a Net is just so natural and, although a big part of the story, it's never too much.
I really loved how this book dealt with navigating sexuality while being deeply religious. The story was so rich and vibrant with their culture and traditions and E.M. Ben Shaul handled each strand of this story perfectly to build this intricately woven, multifaceted blanket. A truly amazing story about love and religion that will stay with me forever. I loved, loved, loved it and highly recommend it. Undoubtedly one of my favorite books this year.
PS: I HAVE TO MENTION THE COVER! I've been good the whole time but just look at it! It's so gorgeous and fits the story perfectly, combining the religious-aspect and the rainbow for Avi's sexuality.
December 19, 2016
Daniel Perez (Dani for short) a secular Israeli software engineer, is introduced to Avraham Levine (Avi for short), an Orthodox Jew and sign language interpreter, by a mutual friend. Flying Without a Net is the story of their growing relationship and an exploration of one path to reconcile being gay AND remaining a frum or Torah observant Jew.
Perhaps I’ve been reading too much LGBTQ+ YA coming of age fiction recently, but I found Flying Without a Net a bit too predictable. Avi and Dani have more substance than paper dolls moving through the stereotypical moves of a “coming out” novel, but they don’t read or feel like fully fleshed out people either. While there are some nice touches, the growth of their relationship is too episodic and pat for my taste. They do wrestle with certain complications to their budding romance from Avi’s religious background, but it’s a foregone conclusion that they will find a path to mutual satisfaction.
A key part of the story is that Avi’s sister happens to be deaf. E.M. Ben Shaul has a deft touch with making that just a fact and not an Issue, though at the expense of an info-dump or two. Similarly, the question of consent is at the forefront of the story, and while crucial, how it is handled is one of the things that are almost too good to be believed for real people.
If you know Jewish Boston at all, you will recognize many of the places named, but I don’t know how well the descriptions will resonate to those who don’t know the area. Similarly, E.M. Ben Shaul had a difficult challenge in deciding how much to explain the Yiddish and Hebrew vocabulary woven through the story and various Jewish customs. Despite the glossary at the end, I don’t know how appealing this book with be for anyone without previous acquaintance to the Frum/Dati world – there are just too many unfamiliar terms to keep up with.
There’s a value to seeing yourself in books and using them to help build and understand your identity. While I found Flying Without A Net a reasonable debut novel with plenty of room for the author to improve, I am not the true target audience. I hope Flying Without A Net finds its way into the hands of young adults (and even older adults) who are questioning their identity and seeking potential role models of how to be true to all their selves. I think they will find the story of Dani and Avi more compelling than I did.
November 18, 2016
I’m a bit torn on this one. On one hand, I loved learning about the Avi and his views on Orthodox Judaism. I found his faith and the difficulties it brought to his life as an Orthodox Jew and gay man to be incredibly fascinating. From the start where the two characters meet, you can tell their relationship is never going to be simple, but the way they navigate the many challenges of both faith and honesty made this story a very interesting read.
On the other hand, the book seemed a bit aimless at times. It tended to float from one scene to the next and I never got a really good picture of where it was that we were going. Mostly it just seemed the tale of how Dani and Avi fall in love and learn to shape both that love and their lives around each other. It wasn’t bad, but I must admit that I would have liked a bit more structure to the plot.
While we don’t get much about it, I did like that Avi was a sign language interpreter. His job sounded really interesting and I wished we could have learned more about it. I actually wouldn’t have minded learning more about what Dani does, as well as his past.
The focus of the story seemed to rest on Avi and how his faith impacted not only his day-to-day life (I loved the bits about food, and how the strict kosher diets made something as simple as cooking or eating out more complex than I’m used to) but his romantic relationships. I am very familiar with trying to reconcile religious and personal beliefs (though much less successfully than Avi) and these parts of the story really spoke to me.
There did seem to be times, though, where it felt like the author skipped over showing us key scenes that are referenced later, but which we never got to experience. It had the effect of making the story seem a bit rushed or choppy in some sections. The prayer sections seemed to attempt to bridge the gap, but it didn’t always quite work (though I will say I loved how the prayer scenes were used to show us more about Avi’s relationship with his religion and his God).
I’ve been going back and forth on whether to go with 3.5 or 4 stars for this, but there were some parts of the book that I really loved so I think I’m going to go with 4 stars. I did enjoy this story, and if you are looking for something that is a bit different I might suggest you give it a try. I will recommend you take a gander at the end of the book, at the glossary of terms, before you start reading (and go back to reference them when needed as you go along) since there are several times in this story I wasn’t quite sure what exactly the characters were saying. It didn’t disrupt the book on the whole, but it might make the story a bit more interesting.
This book was provided free in exchange for a fair and honest review for Love Bytes. Go there to check out other reviews, author interviews, and all those awesome giveaways. Click below.
On the other hand, the book seemed a bit aimless at times. It tended to float from one scene to the next and I never got a really good picture of where it was that we were going. Mostly it just seemed the tale of how Dani and Avi fall in love and learn to shape both that love and their lives around each other. It wasn’t bad, but I must admit that I would have liked a bit more structure to the plot.
While we don’t get much about it, I did like that Avi was a sign language interpreter. His job sounded really interesting and I wished we could have learned more about it. I actually wouldn’t have minded learning more about what Dani does, as well as his past.
The focus of the story seemed to rest on Avi and how his faith impacted not only his day-to-day life (I loved the bits about food, and how the strict kosher diets made something as simple as cooking or eating out more complex than I’m used to) but his romantic relationships. I am very familiar with trying to reconcile religious and personal beliefs (though much less successfully than Avi) and these parts of the story really spoke to me.
There did seem to be times, though, where it felt like the author skipped over showing us key scenes that are referenced later, but which we never got to experience. It had the effect of making the story seem a bit rushed or choppy in some sections. The prayer sections seemed to attempt to bridge the gap, but it didn’t always quite work (though I will say I loved how the prayer scenes were used to show us more about Avi’s relationship with his religion and his God).
I’ve been going back and forth on whether to go with 3.5 or 4 stars for this, but there were some parts of the book that I really loved so I think I’m going to go with 4 stars. I did enjoy this story, and if you are looking for something that is a bit different I might suggest you give it a try. I will recommend you take a gander at the end of the book, at the glossary of terms, before you start reading (and go back to reference them when needed as you go along) since there are several times in this story I wasn’t quite sure what exactly the characters were saying. It didn’t disrupt the book on the whole, but it might make the story a bit more interesting.
This book was provided free in exchange for a fair and honest review for Love Bytes. Go there to check out other reviews, author interviews, and all those awesome giveaways. Click below.
November 28, 2016
Fascinating tale of two men falling in love, all the while one of them is dealing with how his religious faith seems to be against his desires. A must read.
April 8, 2017
***I won this book in a Goodreads Giveaway***
I loved the characters and the plot of this book. I especially loved that it took place in the ultra-orthodox Jewish community. I especially especially loved that it involved a gay romance trying to navigate within the ultra-orthodox Jewish community. What I didn't like was this book was so "explain-y". The dialogue was an awkward, humorless diatribe that explained exactly what the characters were thinking. There was no room given to the reader to imagine or infer what that characters were feeling; that was just written right there on the page in pedantic, humorless conversations.
I loved Ari and Dani. Their simple, gentle love story deserves to be told. I just wish it were less "told" and more "shown". Sometimes the reader wants to feel and imagine the story.
I loved the characters and the plot of this book. I especially loved that it took place in the ultra-orthodox Jewish community. I especially especially loved that it involved a gay romance trying to navigate within the ultra-orthodox Jewish community. What I didn't like was this book was so "explain-y". The dialogue was an awkward, humorless diatribe that explained exactly what the characters were thinking. There was no room given to the reader to imagine or infer what that characters were feeling; that was just written right there on the page in pedantic, humorless conversations.
I loved Ari and Dani. Their simple, gentle love story deserves to be told. I just wish it were less "told" and more "shown". Sometimes the reader wants to feel and imagine the story.
November 29, 2016
Dani Perez is a secular Israeli who lives in Boston. He's introduced to Avi Levine by a mutual friend and is immediately attracted, but warned off. Dani has a reputation for having flings, and Avi's friend knows that Avi isn't that sort of man.
Avi is an Orthodox Jew, and growing up in his dati/frum (religiously observant) community he's known that he can only have romantic physical contact with the person who would be his marriage partner. He's 33 years old, only recently came to grips with his attraction for men, and has kissed three women in his whole life. He is, in his own words, an innocent. And he's scared to give himself physically to anyone, as it's a sin outside of marriage. The catch? Gay marriage is still not accepted within the Orthodox community.
Dani is willing to build a friendship with Avi, and see if it leads to more, because he finds Avi's spiritualism and deep consideration of his morality to be a refreshing perspective. The more time these men spend with each other, the more they connect--and the harder it is for Avi to completely devote himself to a pure life. He's also afraid that his parents, and shul (temple), might cut him off, and this would be emotionally devastating.
This is a beautifully written and engaging story about finding a path that reconciles conflicting desires. Avi is a student of Judaism. He discusses his conflicts with his rabbi, and seeks advice regarding how to be a sexually active gay man, and also how to still live within God's law. It's also a story about patience and building a deep love, because Dani is the catalyst for much of Avi's study--Avi would have looked into it on his own, at some point, but he does it now, with fervor, knowing that Dani is willing to walk this path at his side, and at his pace.
That doesn't mean there aren't troubles; because there are. Dani's afraid to love Avi too much, and learn that Avi simply won't ever become a partner to him. He's also afraid to pressure Avi in any way, physically, and he considerately waits for Avi to make his moves. Avi's unused to physical touch, as this is not part of his dati life. Even holding hands and hugging is something only done between married partners or close relations. I honestly loved the tenderness that resulted from these tenets. Dani understands what it means when Avi tentatively touches his hand, or takes it when they walk, or offers a fleeting kiss. He accepts that Avi is closeted, with the understanding that Avi will come out...eventually. (It totally happens, though I wished we'd seen his reveal to the parents!)
The book is almost all told from Dani's point-of-view, and his experience of being beside Avi on this adventure into love. We get Avi's most intimate thoughts in the form of prayers he makes on his journey. He's so remarkably earnest, begging God to help him find balance between his devoted spiritual life, and his desire to have a fulfilling relationship. Avi's not content being asexual; he wants whatever sexual contact that he can have within the strictures of his faith. I found that so immediately relatable, as I've seen that same desire present in persons of the fundamental Christian faith, where I was raised. Seriously, I pretty much teared up whenever I read one of Avi's prayers. I so wanted him to have the love of his God and his life, and not be in spiritual conflict.
Dani has his own hurdles, namely Avi's family, to surmount. He's an outsider to their community, and a contemporary gay man. Could he possibly be a good partner for Avi? It's more than simply knowing the prayers, and understanding the terminology. Avi's Orthodox faith is a constant presence, between them, at first. His dietary restrictions and shul responsibilities aside, Avi's very much wrapped in his dati world. But as the story goes on, it's easy to see how this faith grows and envelops both men. There are moments of extreme frustration for Dani, without question. But, he doesn't become bitter. His love is so tender and patient, and he finds contentment in their closeness, even if it doesn't quite become physical--or very physical. Being the first man for Avi to kiss, or touch, or see naked, it's a gift, almost, for Dani. Because he understands how hard Avi considered before making those overtures, and Dani finds that is in itself fulfilling. Dani doesn't want Avi to sacrifice himself for Dani's own needs, Dani wants Avi to choose him wholeheartedly, so that they can both revel in their love for one another. And, spoiler, this happens.
The book is not a sexy book. There are some moments of sexytimes, but they are few and fraught. The romance is heady, nonetheless, with Dani and Avi both finding exactly what they'd needed in each other. There is a whole lot of Judaism, which I found interesting, but I'm a goy married to a secular Jew. (My hubs likes the idea of me being a shiksa, but I digress.) I've heard or spoken some of the prayers, I've been around the Reform community for twenty-five years. For me, this was a window to a beautiful religious experience, though I can imagine others might not be so captivated. And, I loved the handy glossary at the back, because holy smokes is there a lot of Hebrew and Yiddish terminology. I didn't find it inaccessible, as the definitions and context clues are well-placed, but it was nice to have an official resource.
Finishing this book, I had one thought in my head: I sure hope Avi finds a way to adopt a child with Dani, because I want these beautiful men to have a family. They were that real to me.
Avi is an Orthodox Jew, and growing up in his dati/frum (religiously observant) community he's known that he can only have romantic physical contact with the person who would be his marriage partner. He's 33 years old, only recently came to grips with his attraction for men, and has kissed three women in his whole life. He is, in his own words, an innocent. And he's scared to give himself physically to anyone, as it's a sin outside of marriage. The catch? Gay marriage is still not accepted within the Orthodox community.
Dani is willing to build a friendship with Avi, and see if it leads to more, because he finds Avi's spiritualism and deep consideration of his morality to be a refreshing perspective. The more time these men spend with each other, the more they connect--and the harder it is for Avi to completely devote himself to a pure life. He's also afraid that his parents, and shul (temple), might cut him off, and this would be emotionally devastating.
This is a beautifully written and engaging story about finding a path that reconciles conflicting desires. Avi is a student of Judaism. He discusses his conflicts with his rabbi, and seeks advice regarding how to be a sexually active gay man, and also how to still live within God's law. It's also a story about patience and building a deep love, because Dani is the catalyst for much of Avi's study--Avi would have looked into it on his own, at some point, but he does it now, with fervor, knowing that Dani is willing to walk this path at his side, and at his pace.
That doesn't mean there aren't troubles; because there are. Dani's afraid to love Avi too much, and learn that Avi simply won't ever become a partner to him. He's also afraid to pressure Avi in any way, physically, and he considerately waits for Avi to make his moves. Avi's unused to physical touch, as this is not part of his dati life. Even holding hands and hugging is something only done between married partners or close relations. I honestly loved the tenderness that resulted from these tenets. Dani understands what it means when Avi tentatively touches his hand, or takes it when they walk, or offers a fleeting kiss. He accepts that Avi is closeted, with the understanding that Avi will come out...eventually. (It totally happens, though I wished we'd seen his reveal to the parents!)
The book is almost all told from Dani's point-of-view, and his experience of being beside Avi on this adventure into love. We get Avi's most intimate thoughts in the form of prayers he makes on his journey. He's so remarkably earnest, begging God to help him find balance between his devoted spiritual life, and his desire to have a fulfilling relationship. Avi's not content being asexual; he wants whatever sexual contact that he can have within the strictures of his faith. I found that so immediately relatable, as I've seen that same desire present in persons of the fundamental Christian faith, where I was raised. Seriously, I pretty much teared up whenever I read one of Avi's prayers. I so wanted him to have the love of his God and his life, and not be in spiritual conflict.
Dani has his own hurdles, namely Avi's family, to surmount. He's an outsider to their community, and a contemporary gay man. Could he possibly be a good partner for Avi? It's more than simply knowing the prayers, and understanding the terminology. Avi's Orthodox faith is a constant presence, between them, at first. His dietary restrictions and shul responsibilities aside, Avi's very much wrapped in his dati world. But as the story goes on, it's easy to see how this faith grows and envelops both men. There are moments of extreme frustration for Dani, without question. But, he doesn't become bitter. His love is so tender and patient, and he finds contentment in their closeness, even if it doesn't quite become physical--or very physical. Being the first man for Avi to kiss, or touch, or see naked, it's a gift, almost, for Dani. Because he understands how hard Avi considered before making those overtures, and Dani finds that is in itself fulfilling. Dani doesn't want Avi to sacrifice himself for Dani's own needs, Dani wants Avi to choose him wholeheartedly, so that they can both revel in their love for one another. And, spoiler, this happens.
The book is not a sexy book. There are some moments of sexytimes, but they are few and fraught. The romance is heady, nonetheless, with Dani and Avi both finding exactly what they'd needed in each other. There is a whole lot of Judaism, which I found interesting, but I'm a goy married to a secular Jew. (My hubs likes the idea of me being a shiksa, but I digress.) I've heard or spoken some of the prayers, I've been around the Reform community for twenty-five years. For me, this was a window to a beautiful religious experience, though I can imagine others might not be so captivated. And, I loved the handy glossary at the back, because holy smokes is there a lot of Hebrew and Yiddish terminology. I didn't find it inaccessible, as the definitions and context clues are well-placed, but it was nice to have an official resource.
Finishing this book, I had one thought in my head: I sure hope Avi finds a way to adopt a child with Dani, because I want these beautiful men to have a family. They were that real to me.
February 20, 2019
Finished it & while I need a few moments to put my overflowing thoughts in a coherent structure I've to say that this book is one if the rare gems beneath lots of great titles. 😭💗
It was tender & sweet, challenged religious beliefs (in a very pleasant way) & what it means to be queer.
Amazing read.💗
Avi & Dani are two of the most precious MCs I've ever met. 💗
It was tender & sweet, challenged religious beliefs (in a very pleasant way) & what it means to be queer.
Amazing read.💗
Avi & Dani are two of the most precious MCs I've ever met. 💗
June 4, 2017
An engaging premise that draaaags through the budding relationship. It's the first time I can say a book has too much open communication.
The romance is strong in itself. It's a slow burn. There's a partial sex scene. It's really sweet how much Dani holds back for Avi's comfort. But they talk through everything. Every. little. thing. And there's so much repetition. This is a case where, yes, this is totally a realistic depiction of a conversation, but, no, I don't want to slog through an entire realistic conversation. By a certain point the reader gets that Avi's reluctant and Dani's being accommodating without it being rehashed for every new event or milestone.
There's nothing else to the story. It's two guys talking through religious barriers to a gay relationship. That's it. There's no antagonist; there's no forces working against them. It's them going through the motions of Judaism and slowly inching towards more intimacy with everyone supporting them. I mean, the fact that Avi goes as far as he does with Dani is a feat in itself, and I fucking WISH more religious queer people had such a supportive environment. But I need more than that for tension in a book. The brief glimpses into Avi's internal conflict (the story's POV is Dani) make me wonder if this would be stronger from Avi's POV, but I admit that would limit the accessibility of the story with Avi's intense religious tone.
Overall, it's a decent story about two guys traversing a tricky relationship. There's a shit ton of Hebrew/Yiddish terminology though, which is a barrier, even for me, even without my grievances*. And I found myself bored by the end when everything became a rinse and repeat. I truly believe more religious queer stories should exist, but the narrative structure of this one just fell flat.
[*I am an Ashkenazi Jew from Eastern-Europe, and I've delved briefly into Orthodoxy, so I have a sense of the religious terminology that Avi uses. My partner is an Israeli Jew of Ashkenazi descent (exactly like Dani), and he fucking hates the pronunciations I've acquired from the Orthodox community. To him, the sound of "Shabbos" is like a lisped version of "Shabbat." For people in the back: there's a letter in Hebrew that interpreted as either a T or an S depending on the sect of Judaism. For example, someone who has grown up saying "Shabbos" would say "tzistzis" instead of "tzitzit." And from my experience, the people who use Shabbos don't tend to code-switch to Shabbat in casual conversation (unless it's me with my partner or the sales lady at the bakery who says both "Good Shabbos" and "Shabbat Shalom"). I don't know how it is in Boston, but this is what I've seen in my New York neighborhoods. So, for me, this book reads like a mish-mash of two versions of Hebrew and Yiddish (which is closer to German than Hebrew) with no reasoning for it.]
The romance is strong in itself. It's a slow burn. There's a partial sex scene. It's really sweet how much Dani holds back for Avi's comfort. But they talk through everything. Every. little. thing. And there's so much repetition. This is a case where, yes, this is totally a realistic depiction of a conversation, but, no, I don't want to slog through an entire realistic conversation. By a certain point the reader gets that Avi's reluctant and Dani's being accommodating without it being rehashed for every new event or milestone.
There's nothing else to the story. It's two guys talking through religious barriers to a gay relationship. That's it. There's no antagonist; there's no forces working against them. It's them going through the motions of Judaism and slowly inching towards more intimacy with everyone supporting them. I mean, the fact that Avi goes as far as he does with Dani is a feat in itself, and I fucking WISH more religious queer people had such a supportive environment. But I need more than that for tension in a book. The brief glimpses into Avi's internal conflict (the story's POV is Dani) make me wonder if this would be stronger from Avi's POV, but I admit that would limit the accessibility of the story with Avi's intense religious tone.
Overall, it's a decent story about two guys traversing a tricky relationship. There's a shit ton of Hebrew/Yiddish terminology though, which is a barrier, even for me, even without my grievances*. And I found myself bored by the end when everything became a rinse and repeat. I truly believe more religious queer stories should exist, but the narrative structure of this one just fell flat.
[*I am an Ashkenazi Jew from Eastern-Europe, and I've delved briefly into Orthodoxy, so I have a sense of the religious terminology that Avi uses. My partner is an Israeli Jew of Ashkenazi descent (exactly like Dani), and he fucking hates the pronunciations I've acquired from the Orthodox community. To him, the sound of "Shabbos" is like a lisped version of "Shabbat." For people in the back: there's a letter in Hebrew that interpreted as either a T or an S depending on the sect of Judaism. For example, someone who has grown up saying "Shabbos" would say "tzistzis" instead of "tzitzit." And from my experience, the people who use Shabbos don't tend to code-switch to Shabbat in casual conversation (unless it's me with my partner or the sales lady at the bakery who says both "Good Shabbos" and "Shabbat Shalom"). I don't know how it is in Boston, but this is what I've seen in my New York neighborhoods. So, for me, this book reads like a mish-mash of two versions of Hebrew and Yiddish (which is closer to German than Hebrew) with no reasoning for it.]
Read
March 12, 2017Two Jews walk into a bar… and one of them says, “Ouch!”
I have always thought that joke was hilarious and, being too young to perform Vaudeville (I was born in 1970, so I missed the boat), I have never before had the opportunity to tell it. But right now, I’m writing a review of Flying Without a Net by E. M. ben Shaul, a novel which tells the love story of Dani (an Israeli who has grown up in a culturally-Jewish-but-secular home in the U.S.) and Avi, who is a practicing Orthodox man. They meet, find attraction, and must struggle with the conflict between their relationship and Avi’s religious devotion.
(Actually, the joke I REALLY want to tell is “Who is Anette, and why is she so important to fly with?” but see how I’ve refrained?)
Avi and Dani don’t exactly walk into a bar, but they do go for coffee at a coffee shop which, at least in New York where I’m from, is kind of like a bar in the daytime. (I used to go to actual bars in the daytime, but that was back in graduate school, and was mostly to play pool. I do not recommend it, unless you are looking to hang out with some very questionable day drinkers. Yes, jokers, I do count me-at-25 among them.) These guys live in Boston, with which I’m not very familiar (except for experiencing some homophobia, bad driving and White Frat Dudes on the Loose while on vacation there many years ago), but I’m going to assume the equivalency holds.
In many ways, the novel is a version of Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, recast as a coming-of-age (this can happen at any age, and for Avi, it happens rather late in life) story about a young religious man finding his world rattled when his sexuality (he’s gay) becomes more than theoretical. As with that novel, it’s epistolary: most chapters begin with a letter to God (from Avi). Avi’s trying to find his way into his newly-relevant sexuality (in the same way that Margaret is trying to find her way into her sex/gender). The story even, at one point, makes a direct shout-out to the book.
Avi’s family is large and very welcoming to Dani, and they embrace the budding relationship between the two men immediately, as does everyone in the novel. This is not a book that has dealings with the (very real) struggle against homophobia many of us face, or about the (very real) worries we queers have when coming out in our own communities and families, it’s a fantasy/love story.
While Avi is out to his family, he’s not had a relationship with a man before, and doing so
constitutes another coming out, whether the character recognizes it or not… coming out isn’t a one-time deal; most of us queer folk come out over and over and over, in every new situation, every time we meet someone new, every time we figure something out about ourselves that our culture has worked very hard to prevent us from coming to know. That experience is very particular to being queer and hard for most other folks to recognize. But this novel isn’t about that, or about homophobia, or danger of any kind; it’s about the struggle to reconcile one’s faith with one’s desires, and that struggle is pretty universal, something nearly anyone can recontextualize and understand on their own terms. And that struggle is no joke.
I have always thought that joke was hilarious and, being too young to perform Vaudeville (I was born in 1970, so I missed the boat), I have never before had the opportunity to tell it. But right now, I’m writing a review of Flying Without a Net by E. M. ben Shaul, a novel which tells the love story of Dani (an Israeli who has grown up in a culturally-Jewish-but-secular home in the U.S.) and Avi, who is a practicing Orthodox man. They meet, find attraction, and must struggle with the conflict between their relationship and Avi’s religious devotion.
(Actually, the joke I REALLY want to tell is “Who is Anette, and why is she so important to fly with?” but see how I’ve refrained?)
Avi and Dani don’t exactly walk into a bar, but they do go for coffee at a coffee shop which, at least in New York where I’m from, is kind of like a bar in the daytime. (I used to go to actual bars in the daytime, but that was back in graduate school, and was mostly to play pool. I do not recommend it, unless you are looking to hang out with some very questionable day drinkers. Yes, jokers, I do count me-at-25 among them.) These guys live in Boston, with which I’m not very familiar (except for experiencing some homophobia, bad driving and White Frat Dudes on the Loose while on vacation there many years ago), but I’m going to assume the equivalency holds.
In many ways, the novel is a version of Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, recast as a coming-of-age (this can happen at any age, and for Avi, it happens rather late in life) story about a young religious man finding his world rattled when his sexuality (he’s gay) becomes more than theoretical. As with that novel, it’s epistolary: most chapters begin with a letter to God (from Avi). Avi’s trying to find his way into his newly-relevant sexuality (in the same way that Margaret is trying to find her way into her sex/gender). The story even, at one point, makes a direct shout-out to the book.
Avi’s family is large and very welcoming to Dani, and they embrace the budding relationship between the two men immediately, as does everyone in the novel. This is not a book that has dealings with the (very real) struggle against homophobia many of us face, or about the (very real) worries we queers have when coming out in our own communities and families, it’s a fantasy/love story.
While Avi is out to his family, he’s not had a relationship with a man before, and doing so
constitutes another coming out, whether the character recognizes it or not… coming out isn’t a one-time deal; most of us queer folk come out over and over and over, in every new situation, every time we meet someone new, every time we figure something out about ourselves that our culture has worked very hard to prevent us from coming to know. That experience is very particular to being queer and hard for most other folks to recognize. But this novel isn’t about that, or about homophobia, or danger of any kind; it’s about the struggle to reconcile one’s faith with one’s desires, and that struggle is pretty universal, something nearly anyone can recontextualize and understand on their own terms. And that struggle is no joke.
May 23, 2017
This was okay- but was very tellingly. The narrator creates a gap between the reader and the characters and their story. It felt to me like the author didn't make the best decisions in what dialog she included (a lot of it boring and pointless) and what things she described as going on, as opposed to having them happen as you read. It's not a good sign when I am thinking all this as I am reading the story.
Also, I didn't believe that a fairly secular Jew would have difficulty understanding the issues an Orthodox Jew would have in reconciling being gay and being in a gay relationship with his religion/spirituality. And how he would go about it. I know, and I'm not Jewish.
I liked that the main tale was about Ari finding his way to living a good life. In all senses of the word.
Also, I didn't believe that a fairly secular Jew would have difficulty understanding the issues an Orthodox Jew would have in reconciling being gay and being in a gay relationship with his religion/spirituality. And how he would go about it. I know, and I'm not Jewish.
I liked that the main tale was about Ari finding his way to living a good life. In all senses of the word.
April 16, 2022
This book has one of the prettiest covers I've seen in a while!
I appreciated the exploration of coming to terms with being dati and also maintaining a gay relationship with all that might entail. Unfortunately, I think the story suffered from poor pacing and editing. There were time jumps that weren't clearly delineated, and events happened offscreen that we should have seen - most notably when Avi mentions it casually in convo and Dani doesn't even blink at what seems like a big deal.
I appreciated the exploration of coming to terms with being dati and also maintaining a gay relationship with all that might entail. Unfortunately, I think the story suffered from poor pacing and editing. There were time jumps that weren't clearly delineated, and events happened offscreen that we should have seen - most notably when Avi mentions it casually in convo and Dani doesn't even blink at what seems like a big deal.
February 7, 2017
Oh this book.
OH THIS BOOK.
I think I should clarify real quick that I am an atheist and yes, I read a book about religion. I am actually very pro-religion, which isn't a combination you see often (then again, I am also a pro-sex sex-repulsed asexual, so there you go).
Honestly, as long as you don't use (or actually misuse) your religion to oppress others, like the Westboro Baptist Church does, but instead are religious because it's really important to you etc, totally go for it!
So why did I read a book that focuses a lot on religion?
Well, first of all, you had me at sign language interpreter.
Second of all, since I want to be unbiased etc about religion, I want to low-key educate myself on all the different religions out there (LOW-KEY, PLEASE KEEP IN MIND LOW-KEY) by reading books and fanfictions like this and by reading blogposts about the Islam, about Christianity, about Judaism, about Hinduism, about Buddhism and so on. I am ashamed to say I once bashed religion a lot, and I do not want to fall back into that bullshit again.
Except for occasionally reading a Jewish tumblr user's blog post, I never really knew anything about this religion, and then this book came along. Since the fanfic Things I Cannot Change taught me so much about Christianity and sexuality, I decided to use my IP giftcards on this book.
I can't say it's the best thing ever written, since I still am an atheist who sometimes cannot understand why people are religious, but it sure as hell helped me. Dani and Avi were so great together, and well, despite the fact that they're both Jewish, they're very different.
Which is normal.
And so are their families.
Sure, this book was confusing 80% of the time, but I did enjoy it. I loved how Dani and Avi opened up to each other, but also to themselves. I loved the background characters (DEAF CHARACTER HOLY SH-) and how the relation unfolds.
The Yiddish and Hebrew added so much more to the story (like how Spanish adds so much more to In The Heights: the musical), but I must say that I don't recommend buying the eBook if you don't know the terms. There is an Appendix explaining all the Hebrew and Yiddish terms, but if you read the eBook, you cannot easily access those pages. I got to read them after I finished the book and wow, it cleared up a lot.
So how do you avoid confusion?
BUY THE PHYSICAL COPY!
I have one last question: E.M. Ben Shaul's Goodreads account shows another book featuring Dani and Avi? Where can I find that?
OH THIS BOOK.
I think I should clarify real quick that I am an atheist and yes, I read a book about religion. I am actually very pro-religion, which isn't a combination you see often (then again, I am also a pro-sex sex-repulsed asexual, so there you go).
Honestly, as long as you don't use (or actually misuse) your religion to oppress others, like the Westboro Baptist Church does, but instead are religious because it's really important to you etc, totally go for it!
So why did I read a book that focuses a lot on religion?
Well, first of all, you had me at sign language interpreter.
Second of all, since I want to be unbiased etc about religion, I want to low-key educate myself on all the different religions out there (LOW-KEY, PLEASE KEEP IN MIND LOW-KEY) by reading books and fanfictions like this and by reading blogposts about the Islam, about Christianity, about Judaism, about Hinduism, about Buddhism and so on. I am ashamed to say I once bashed religion a lot, and I do not want to fall back into that bullshit again.
Except for occasionally reading a Jewish tumblr user's blog post, I never really knew anything about this religion, and then this book came along. Since the fanfic Things I Cannot Change taught me so much about Christianity and sexuality, I decided to use my IP giftcards on this book.
I can't say it's the best thing ever written, since I still am an atheist who sometimes cannot understand why people are religious, but it sure as hell helped me. Dani and Avi were so great together, and well, despite the fact that they're both Jewish, they're very different.
Which is normal.
And so are their families.
Sure, this book was confusing 80% of the time, but I did enjoy it. I loved how Dani and Avi opened up to each other, but also to themselves. I loved the background characters (DEAF CHARACTER HOLY SH-) and how the relation unfolds.
The Yiddish and Hebrew added so much more to the story (like how Spanish adds so much more to In The Heights: the musical), but I must say that I don't recommend buying the eBook if you don't know the terms. There is an Appendix explaining all the Hebrew and Yiddish terms, but if you read the eBook, you cannot easily access those pages. I got to read them after I finished the book and wow, it cleared up a lot.
So how do you avoid confusion?
BUY THE PHYSICAL COPY!
I have one last question: E.M. Ben Shaul's Goodreads account shows another book featuring Dani and Avi? Where can I find that?
October 20, 2017
A really fun read! It's so nice to read a book with Jewish characters who are actually real people... Not to mention the writing is excellent!
December 1, 2016
*4.5 stars*
As an avid reader (reading 5-7 books a week) there are times when I'm in the mood for a certain kind of book. It can be something funny, something that will tug at my emotions, even something that will keep me on the edge of my seat ... or sometimes, I just like to read a quiet story that follows two people as the begin a new relationship. Such is the case for E.M. Ben Shaul's exquisite book, Flying Without a Net. Gorgeous writing, engaging and utterly captivating characters, and a romance that had me swooning all over the place, this book wasn't like anything I expected, but it was just what I wanted.
The book focuses on Dani Perez and Avi Levine, two guys who meet by chance but are instantly attracted to one another. I was completely enchanted from their first meeting on. This is such a gentle book, the romance is almost innocent in it's development, due almost solely to Avi's being an Orthodox Jew. I have to confess, my experiences with Judaism in general are very limited. And to the extent that Avi is immersed in his, no experience at all. I found it all so fascinating, from the way he talks, to the way he dresses and eats and prays, I learned something new on every single page. I will say that the use of Hebrew and Yiddish terms was a bit challenging at times, but don't let this intimidate you in the least. The traditions and culture of Avi and his family are just so intriguing and interesting, you'll find yourself completely enthralled just as I was.
The writing is gorgeous in this book. It's quiet with no action or drama, just the struggle of Avi coming to terms with being gay while being devoutly religious and Dani wanting nothing more than to support Avi and love him. Their interactions are so sweet, but not to the point of saccharine or sappiness. Avi's journey to acceptance of himself and his faith were just so lovely. I loved Dani's complete willingness to be there for Avi, to not push and to not try to change him. It was hard for him at times, sure, but it's realistic. All of the secondary characters were well developed and played an integral part of the story. And can I just say I adored Avi's brother, Jake! He was just so fantastic.
As always with an Interlude Press book, the writing is spectacular, the story flows well, and the characters simply jump off the page. And let's not forget the fabulous cover?! IP has some of the best ones out there. Be sure to check this one out, people! We need diverse books, full of characters and settings and religions we might not always be exposed to. E.M. Ben Shaul's novel is wonderful and I am so excited to see what she writes next!
*this review will also be posted on www.diversereader.blogspot.com*
As an avid reader (reading 5-7 books a week) there are times when I'm in the mood for a certain kind of book. It can be something funny, something that will tug at my emotions, even something that will keep me on the edge of my seat ... or sometimes, I just like to read a quiet story that follows two people as the begin a new relationship. Such is the case for E.M. Ben Shaul's exquisite book, Flying Without a Net. Gorgeous writing, engaging and utterly captivating characters, and a romance that had me swooning all over the place, this book wasn't like anything I expected, but it was just what I wanted.
The book focuses on Dani Perez and Avi Levine, two guys who meet by chance but are instantly attracted to one another. I was completely enchanted from their first meeting on. This is such a gentle book, the romance is almost innocent in it's development, due almost solely to Avi's being an Orthodox Jew. I have to confess, my experiences with Judaism in general are very limited. And to the extent that Avi is immersed in his, no experience at all. I found it all so fascinating, from the way he talks, to the way he dresses and eats and prays, I learned something new on every single page. I will say that the use of Hebrew and Yiddish terms was a bit challenging at times, but don't let this intimidate you in the least. The traditions and culture of Avi and his family are just so intriguing and interesting, you'll find yourself completely enthralled just as I was.
The writing is gorgeous in this book. It's quiet with no action or drama, just the struggle of Avi coming to terms with being gay while being devoutly religious and Dani wanting nothing more than to support Avi and love him. Their interactions are so sweet, but not to the point of saccharine or sappiness. Avi's journey to acceptance of himself and his faith were just so lovely. I loved Dani's complete willingness to be there for Avi, to not push and to not try to change him. It was hard for him at times, sure, but it's realistic. All of the secondary characters were well developed and played an integral part of the story. And can I just say I adored Avi's brother, Jake! He was just so fantastic.
As always with an Interlude Press book, the writing is spectacular, the story flows well, and the characters simply jump off the page. And let's not forget the fabulous cover?! IP has some of the best ones out there. Be sure to check this one out, people! We need diverse books, full of characters and settings and religions we might not always be exposed to. E.M. Ben Shaul's novel is wonderful and I am so excited to see what she writes next!
*this review will also be posted on www.diversereader.blogspot.com*
December 23, 2016
Original review on Molly Lolly
Four and a half stars!
This story was amazing. I adored Avi and Dani together. They compliment each other so well and watching their story unfold was beautiful. The way Dani took Avi’s faith and his gentle nature into account was so sweet. The emotions between these two leapt off the page and had me engaged right from the beginning. I couldn’t put the book down until it was over. I adored Ms. Shaul’s voice in this story. She writes profound characters and crystal clear emotion. I cannot wait to read more by her in the future.
Dani was such a powerful character. The way he cares for Avi and all of the hurdles that they have to overcome was wonderful to see. Dani is gentle with Avi and only pushes when he knows he can. His frank conversations with his brother, and eventually Avi’s brother, give us insight into just who Dani is and how deep his feelings go. I loved how Dani worked hard to prove himself to not only Avi but Avi’s family as well.
Oh Avi. Dear, sweet, beautiful Avi. From the moment he showed up on page I knew he was going to be a wonderful character. And I was right and oh so wrong at the same time. He was wonderful. But he was so much more than that too. His faith was as much a part of him as the color of his hair or the shape of his face. They’re all things that can’t truly be changed about a person. Avi lived his life as authentically as possible and walked a path that was as close to halachic perfection as he could get. The way Avi found a balance between his physical wants and religious needs was awe inspiring and just a little bit humbling. The prayers to Hashem throughout the story were fabulous. I loved getting to see inside Avi’s mind and how he’s coping with his relationship with Dani.
The journey these two go on in this story was such a joy to read. The slow built to their relationship and how they go from friends to testing the waters to boyfriends to partners is consuming. You get dragged in and immediately want to see them make it. The characters around these two make a fabulous family. They each have their own personality that shines in the story but doesn’t overshadow the purpose; Dani and Avi’s love. By the time we get to the end of the story and their amazing happily ever after, you have all the feels. The epilogue with these two shows you how perfect they are together and also gives you a glimpse at what their life will be like for the rest of their days. And it’s happiest of happy looks ahead.
Four and a half stars!
This story was amazing. I adored Avi and Dani together. They compliment each other so well and watching their story unfold was beautiful. The way Dani took Avi’s faith and his gentle nature into account was so sweet. The emotions between these two leapt off the page and had me engaged right from the beginning. I couldn’t put the book down until it was over. I adored Ms. Shaul’s voice in this story. She writes profound characters and crystal clear emotion. I cannot wait to read more by her in the future.
Dani was such a powerful character. The way he cares for Avi and all of the hurdles that they have to overcome was wonderful to see. Dani is gentle with Avi and only pushes when he knows he can. His frank conversations with his brother, and eventually Avi’s brother, give us insight into just who Dani is and how deep his feelings go. I loved how Dani worked hard to prove himself to not only Avi but Avi’s family as well.
Oh Avi. Dear, sweet, beautiful Avi. From the moment he showed up on page I knew he was going to be a wonderful character. And I was right and oh so wrong at the same time. He was wonderful. But he was so much more than that too. His faith was as much a part of him as the color of his hair or the shape of his face. They’re all things that can’t truly be changed about a person. Avi lived his life as authentically as possible and walked a path that was as close to halachic perfection as he could get. The way Avi found a balance between his physical wants and religious needs was awe inspiring and just a little bit humbling. The prayers to Hashem throughout the story were fabulous. I loved getting to see inside Avi’s mind and how he’s coping with his relationship with Dani.
The journey these two go on in this story was such a joy to read. The slow built to their relationship and how they go from friends to testing the waters to boyfriends to partners is consuming. You get dragged in and immediately want to see them make it. The characters around these two make a fabulous family. They each have their own personality that shines in the story but doesn’t overshadow the purpose; Dani and Avi’s love. By the time we get to the end of the story and their amazing happily ever after, you have all the feels. The epilogue with these two shows you how perfect they are together and also gives you a glimpse at what their life will be like for the rest of their days. And it’s happiest of happy looks ahead.
December 31, 2016
I truly loved this story and had a blast with it, despite some things I might have done differently...
November 27, 2016
When we talk about representation, when I talk about why #weneeddiversebooks, I somehow never thought that it would apply to Judaism–I “am” so many communities, and I’m such an “heretic” in regards of my religion, surely, that aspect of me doesn’t need to see itself in ink, right?
Oh boy, was I wrong.
To read about those two men, about their relationship, with each other and with God and with traditions (cue Tevye), made my heart swell with memories, with the joy and the pure, fond frustration I feel with my people, for my people.
Each careful word, embedded with Hebrew or Yiddish accents, brought me back to myself as a child, listening to my grandfathers reading the “stories” that were actually from the Torah.
Each seemingly unimportant detail painted the picture of my grandmothers switching from one set of cutlery to the other while humming Yiddish lullabies and letting me play by their sides.
Each prayer brought me my father back, and that is irreplaceable.
BUT.While my own background gives me a special appreciation for this story–and really, I am forever grateful that this book came to Life–what struck me, as I tried to read it with an objective sight, was E.M. Ben Shaul’s true tour de force.
Knowing what frum and suvganya means gave me an extra layer–but it only comes on top of a fantastic, rich, heartwarming tapestry that can find an echo in each and every one of us.
Finding love? Questioning things you never thought you would because of that Person that crossed your path? Carving a place for them in your life?
Fearing to meet the family and the loved ones?
Wondering if maybe you’re putting yourself in too vulnerable a position, by letting them in?
How many rom-coms are based on those themes, that E.M. Ben Shaul masterfully wrapped together in this book?
In the world of romance, how universal are those themes?
“Flying Without A Net” is a wonderful read, filled with a gallery of absolutely delightful characters–no one is perfect, and they are all lovable in their own ways (*cough*wait for me Jake*cough*), and it should be enough
December 11, 2023
I would say more like 3.5. There’s a lot of interesting things happening in the story, and Avi working to reconcile his two identities is compelling. The scenes that directly addressed that were the strongest.
But often I found myself reading plain dialogue of a mundane situation that happens to reference a key relationship milestone and I wonder, “Why am I not reading that scene instead?”
But often I found myself reading plain dialogue of a mundane situation that happens to reference a key relationship milestone and I wonder, “Why am I not reading that scene instead?”
November 28, 2016
This is a lovely gentle love story - perhaps an unexpected comment for a book dealing with the topic of bridging the main character's deep, Orthodox religious identity with his love for a secular man. The author is knowledgeable and realistic with the details of an Orthodox life, and beautifully integrates the characters' lives together without melodrama or stereotyping. One of the most noteworthy aspects of the relationship is how these two men from different worlds learn to be together without trying to change each other. An optimistic yet believable view of what the world may become.
March 31, 2025
I won this in a GOODREADS giveaway... WOW.. I really enjoyed this one... not sure I would have picked it myself but here it was, so I read it.. Glad I did.. I wont tell you about the stoty, you can get that anywhere.. I enjoyed it; it ran me through the emotional rollercoaster! Get it, read it, give it as a gift!
December 2, 2016
A brilliant debut for E.M, who proves that a light touch can be most satisfying and more romantic than heavy details. Focusing on a slow build up, the characters grow and change organically into a beautiful and well written love story.
November 22, 2016
Meus judeus ❤️❤️❤️ Livro sem conflito babaca, os que surgem não são os típicos de filme de comédia romântica. Coisa mais linda.
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews