What do you think?
Rate this book
Fantasian
An unnamed narrator’s life at Yale takes a dizzying turn when she meets a girl who looks just like her. Drawn into each other’s social worlds, they spiral deeper and deeper into a house of mirrors made of each other.
120 pages, Paperback
First published October 25, 2016
13 people are currently reading
1238 people want to read
About the author
Larissa Pham
9 books108 followersLarissa Pham is a writer living in Brooklyn. She has written for Adult, Guernica, The Nation and Nerve. Pham studied painting and art history at Yale University.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews
February 19, 2021
so fucking hot--read this if you have poor self-esteem but also wanna fuck yourself.
Read
July 27, 2021the gay asian (auto-)erotica i didn’t know i needed in my life! sped through this one and enjoyed every second of it. dialogue felt slightly canned at times – probably a given with characters who go to yale and talk unironically about lacan – but i honestly didn’t mind much bc it was exceedingly hot and i’m willing endure a few eye roll moments for that
November 18, 2022
Incredibly sexy, bringing intellectual and erotic charge in equal parts. Pham engages with the unspoken, unspeakable, and taboo with a self-awareness and humor that makes this novella very approachable, despite the generous hat-tip to Lacan!
March 27, 2018
A thrillingly sexy book with a little Lacan in the mix.
September 24, 2023
Mmmmmm weird and insane. Probably a 4,5 if we’re being honest. Somehow, the only way I can describe this is: if Bunny were a queer Asian erotica novella, it would be this.
October 11, 2017
Fantasian (2016) by Larissa Pham is the lesbian psycho-thriller you’ve been missing out on. Focussing on an Asian-American unnamed narrator, she falls in love with her doppelgänger. Written with a razor blade, this novel draws you in only to rip your brain apart by the very end of the novel in a cinematic flush. A brushfire read on any easy commute.
December 3, 2016
i loved this -- would be a cool companion read w/ 'you too can have a body like mine' which i also loved
September 17, 2021
Ever since reading Christine Smallwood’s partly politely approving, partly snarky review of the New Lovers series, I’ve been dying to read the so-called “erotica with fine art tendencies.” An erotica writer trying to cram complex themes and profound thoughts into genre fiction is camp, while an artist stooping down to become low-brow is ironic pop art. I wasn’t quite sure which one Larissa Pham was. I had to check it out for myself.
Fantasian is all about mirrors—the main character, an undergrad at Yale (definitely not a stand-in for Pham, who coincidentally also studied art history and painting at Yale and is Asian and is queer and wears cat eye eyeliner!), meets her doppelgänger and starts an affair with her. And her boyfriend. And his sexy twin. They stare at their own reflections in a bathroom after snorting lines and marvel at how alike they are, then everyone fucks everyone and voila! Here’s the mirror theme. Of course there’s more on self-discovery told through bildungsroman-esque metaphors about unstable identities, loneliness, and conformity. But half of it reads like fake deep pretentiousness. Seriously. What in the world is a turbulent gesture?
Even if we pretend like this book is just simple literary fiction as opposed to wank material, Fantasian is over-ambitious with its lofty discussions about Lacanian philosophy and racial identity (comments like the one about being a “POC sidequest” at an elite college are more whiny than relatable even for me—someone who easily slots into many of the identities that the main character inhabits). These mere mentions feel unresolved even at the end of the story, after the supposed plot twist and a cathartic climax where three of the characters die in a house fire (which is more satisfying than any of the actual climaxes the characters achieve during sex).
Knowing that this is a book written by an art major, I expected many random facts about artists. Indeed there were: our erudite sex-havers casually name drop Kusama, Matisse, and I believe Picasso? However, these barely add any substance to the overall narrative and the basic-ness of the artists leave very few new discoveries for the reader to delight upon. They just make our action-getters sound like pretentious pricks. Their references to Bruce Nauman’s participatory artwork and speculative realism (both in the context of cramped bathroom stall conversations with sexual tension so thick you could cut with a knife) feel entirely disconnected from the naughty scenes that ensue.
When it comes to the sex writing, I do agree with Christine Smallwood’s review in that too many clichés like “wet pussy” or “hard cock” is boring while the occasional innovative description like “sparkling clit” (actual phrase lifted from the text) is comical. However, despite the few observations about body parts that slightly catch you off guard, Pham’s imagination is entirely lacking. Picture being caught in the middle of a threesome with two identical twins who are supposedly ravishing. But write this scene with the most boring prose ever. That’s Pham for ya. Very hot situations made mundane by EL James-esque canned phrases.
If we put Vladimir Nabokov’s (I’m biased) somewhat peculiar but charming word choices on one end of the style spectrum, Pham is on the other end. Her vocabulary for narrating hot and heavy action is that of a middle schooler who just learned about intercourse in health class and read a single page of 50 Shades of Gray at the bookstore before she was pulled away by her furious mom. Just plain dull! I felt no heady rush of dopamine while reading sentences like “‘You’re still wet,’ he whispers.” or “I feel him in the very center of me.”
Of course, criticizing is always easy and seeing something worth appreciating is hard. So let me praise the book for the few things it does right. Pham captures intimacy quite well. In one scene, the unnamed narrator’s doppelgänger and crush Dolores puts makeup on her in a sunlit room after observing that they’d look identical if they had the same eyeliner on. Our timid narrator gets close to her friend for the first time and is drunk with infatuation. She recounts, “I’m not sure which eye of hers to make contact with. I settle for looking at the inside corner of her left eye, next to the bridge of her nose where the tears come out, where the thin skin is purpling. I can smell the usual scent of her lavender shampoo, by now hidden under a day’s layer of grime and the cigarette we’d shared on the front steps of her building, warm and a little bit pungent.” The chaste tenderness saturates every word and the warmth of their contact radiates from the page. Our sense of touch is telepathically activated by these descriptions alone. It’s the soft moments in between the throes of passion that the book gets just right. The emotional weight that the other parts are definitely lacking in are awakened in these gentle interactions.
Fantasian isn’t a heavy symphony of sensation but rather a soft tickle that leaves you desiring more. It’s a light and slightly frustrating beginning of arousal.
And that’s enough—no one ever says no to an amuse-bouche.
Fantasian is all about mirrors—the main character, an undergrad at Yale (definitely not a stand-in for Pham, who coincidentally also studied art history and painting at Yale and is Asian and is queer and wears cat eye eyeliner!), meets her doppelgänger and starts an affair with her. And her boyfriend. And his sexy twin. They stare at their own reflections in a bathroom after snorting lines and marvel at how alike they are, then everyone fucks everyone and voila! Here’s the mirror theme. Of course there’s more on self-discovery told through bildungsroman-esque metaphors about unstable identities, loneliness, and conformity. But half of it reads like fake deep pretentiousness. Seriously. What in the world is a turbulent gesture?
Even if we pretend like this book is just simple literary fiction as opposed to wank material, Fantasian is over-ambitious with its lofty discussions about Lacanian philosophy and racial identity (comments like the one about being a “POC sidequest” at an elite college are more whiny than relatable even for me—someone who easily slots into many of the identities that the main character inhabits). These mere mentions feel unresolved even at the end of the story, after the supposed plot twist and a cathartic climax where three of the characters die in a house fire (which is more satisfying than any of the actual climaxes the characters achieve during sex).
Knowing that this is a book written by an art major, I expected many random facts about artists. Indeed there were: our erudite sex-havers casually name drop Kusama, Matisse, and I believe Picasso? However, these barely add any substance to the overall narrative and the basic-ness of the artists leave very few new discoveries for the reader to delight upon. They just make our action-getters sound like pretentious pricks. Their references to Bruce Nauman’s participatory artwork and speculative realism (both in the context of cramped bathroom stall conversations with sexual tension so thick you could cut with a knife) feel entirely disconnected from the naughty scenes that ensue.
When it comes to the sex writing, I do agree with Christine Smallwood’s review in that too many clichés like “wet pussy” or “hard cock” is boring while the occasional innovative description like “sparkling clit” (actual phrase lifted from the text) is comical. However, despite the few observations about body parts that slightly catch you off guard, Pham’s imagination is entirely lacking. Picture being caught in the middle of a threesome with two identical twins who are supposedly ravishing. But write this scene with the most boring prose ever. That’s Pham for ya. Very hot situations made mundane by EL James-esque canned phrases.
If we put Vladimir Nabokov’s (I’m biased) somewhat peculiar but charming word choices on one end of the style spectrum, Pham is on the other end. Her vocabulary for narrating hot and heavy action is that of a middle schooler who just learned about intercourse in health class and read a single page of 50 Shades of Gray at the bookstore before she was pulled away by her furious mom. Just plain dull! I felt no heady rush of dopamine while reading sentences like “‘You’re still wet,’ he whispers.” or “I feel him in the very center of me.”
Of course, criticizing is always easy and seeing something worth appreciating is hard. So let me praise the book for the few things it does right. Pham captures intimacy quite well. In one scene, the unnamed narrator’s doppelgänger and crush Dolores puts makeup on her in a sunlit room after observing that they’d look identical if they had the same eyeliner on. Our timid narrator gets close to her friend for the first time and is drunk with infatuation. She recounts, “I’m not sure which eye of hers to make contact with. I settle for looking at the inside corner of her left eye, next to the bridge of her nose where the tears come out, where the thin skin is purpling. I can smell the usual scent of her lavender shampoo, by now hidden under a day’s layer of grime and the cigarette we’d shared on the front steps of her building, warm and a little bit pungent.” The chaste tenderness saturates every word and the warmth of their contact radiates from the page. Our sense of touch is telepathically activated by these descriptions alone. It’s the soft moments in between the throes of passion that the book gets just right. The emotional weight that the other parts are definitely lacking in are awakened in these gentle interactions.
Fantasian isn’t a heavy symphony of sensation but rather a soft tickle that leaves you desiring more. It’s a light and slightly frustrating beginning of arousal.
And that’s enough—no one ever says no to an amuse-bouche.
Read
July 3, 2025so fun!! i plucked this off of the shelf of my friend's while catsitting i think it's gotten me out of my reading rut!
i was endeared to this book bc it felt like it came out of a very specific place and time (like rich easians struggling to fit in with rich white ppl at ivy league Hahahaha.) the lacan stuff was probably unnecessary but as long as you have a lot of sex in your book, all can be forgiven
i was endeared to this book bc it felt like it came out of a very specific place and time (like rich easians struggling to fit in with rich white ppl at ivy league Hahahaha.) the lacan stuff was probably unnecessary but as long as you have a lot of sex in your book, all can be forgiven
July 11, 2025
3.5 ⭐️
Read
June 21, 2024I lost this at PAT which felt fitting - hence why it took me so long to read, I had to find + buy another copy for less then $50. I would have loved to see it with a different ending, as perfect as this ending is.
Read
August 25, 2023Ok i didnt know this was erotica erotica but very good interesting crazy endong
June 30, 2017
Steamy, erotica ending with a dark but thought provoking twist..brilliant.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 19, 2025
Ok. I want to read more novellas.
That was really awesome and such a good philosophical meditation. I’m obsessed with Larissa Pham’s style, incorporating epicness into the mundane. I need to do that. Reads almost like a parable. It’s not too believable. I kinda love that. Sometimes her writing was a little too heady (no pun intended) or overly indulgent (idk how to explain it) - kinda the way SJM writes where you roll your eyes at her cliche IDK. BUT simultaneously had some banger quotes in there
Also the chapter naming was very satisfying to me. The psychological nature of it all. And the smut was great
I love how sensual the whole book is. How sex is imbued in everything because I feel like it kind of is in life too
“He’s figured out a different way to navigate power, but there are a lot of ways to survive in this world.”
I love that it delves deeply and honestly into how sex and connections can really be an egocentric endeavor- just to learn more about ourselves and who we are. I know for me that resonates with my current time of life— I am really hyper focused (too much at times) on who I am and how things and people in my life make ME feel and think.
She explores how being seen is actually really intimidating and there is relief in NOT being seen, there’s opportunity to be someone you’re not and that can be just as rewarding or at least fun!!! “Haven’t I told you I’ve always wanted to be surrounded? Haven’t I told you I always wanted to disappear?” Sometimes we DONT want to be aware of our “self-ness”, to decenter our egos and just FEEL and exist almost anonymously
“My desire to chase sensation was just me looking for another way to be consumed”
“You can be close to someone, so close to them, and still consider them a stranger”
That was really awesome and such a good philosophical meditation. I’m obsessed with Larissa Pham’s style, incorporating epicness into the mundane. I need to do that. Reads almost like a parable. It’s not too believable. I kinda love that. Sometimes her writing was a little too heady (no pun intended) or overly indulgent (idk how to explain it) - kinda the way SJM writes where you roll your eyes at her cliche IDK. BUT simultaneously had some banger quotes in there
Also the chapter naming was very satisfying to me. The psychological nature of it all. And the smut was great
I love how sensual the whole book is. How sex is imbued in everything because I feel like it kind of is in life too
“He’s figured out a different way to navigate power, but there are a lot of ways to survive in this world.”
I love that it delves deeply and honestly into how sex and connections can really be an egocentric endeavor- just to learn more about ourselves and who we are. I know for me that resonates with my current time of life— I am really hyper focused (too much at times) on who I am and how things and people in my life make ME feel and think.
She explores how being seen is actually really intimidating and there is relief in NOT being seen, there’s opportunity to be someone you’re not and that can be just as rewarding or at least fun!!! “Haven’t I told you I’ve always wanted to be surrounded? Haven’t I told you I always wanted to disappear?” Sometimes we DONT want to be aware of our “self-ness”, to decenter our egos and just FEEL and exist almost anonymously
“My desire to chase sensation was just me looking for another way to be consumed”
“You can be close to someone, so close to them, and still consider them a stranger”
February 27, 2018
A carefully observed, refreshing and lush take on erotic fiction. In Fantasian, desire is not a single channel feeling, so much as a multi-headed hydra, as the narrator plunges into the intersections between pain and pleasure, violence and sex, creating and destroying. Pham is acutely aware of the ways in which sex is entangled with self-making and self-imaging, and loops between observing the self and embodying her.
September 23, 2018
A very sexy and intelligent novella, that will probably leave you behind with burning cheeks. Whether due to desire or flushing depends on your personality type.
I personally loved this sexually fluid piece of erotica. Phams writing is precise and warm, you'll find yourself completely drawn into the compelling story.
For anyone who's become curious: the kindle version is available for 0,99€.
I personally loved this sexually fluid piece of erotica. Phams writing is precise and warm, you'll find yourself completely drawn into the compelling story.
For anyone who's become curious: the kindle version is available for 0,99€.
January 29, 2024
“Somewhere along the line, I realized that my desire to chase sensation was just me looking for another way to be consumed. That all I’ve ever wanted was to disappear so thoroughly I might surface as something else, something new, something transformed.”
story of the lacanian i. bataille would be so pleased! in other news, im not sure why im still shocked when i read artsy erotica and it ends up being, you know, erotica. really enjoyed this! i love you lacan (pretentious)
story of the lacanian i. bataille would be so pleased! in other news, im not sure why im still shocked when i read artsy erotica and it ends up being, you know, erotica. really enjoyed this! i love you lacan (pretentious)
August 29, 2025
Very sexy and kinky. Also very weird and strange at times in a good way. Almost dreamy? I think this book was recommended to me because I liked all fours. Def not as “gross” as all fours but it contains a lot of “smut”. Like a sexy psychological thriller. Also very very short. I also liked the references to art, psychology, and philosophy (?). I enjoyed reading it but was also interrupted many times by my friend.
July 9, 2019
strange, erotic and fascinating, definitely worth the read.
March 7, 2020
weird
Surprising
Fire and consumption
Doubles
Traps
Lacan gets in there. If you wanna know how it feels like to disappear ...
Surprising
Fire and consumption
Doubles
Traps
Lacan gets in there. If you wanna know how it feels like to disappear ...
May 29, 2023
This is …too on the nose for me. Asian girl meets her doppelgänger. It’s an erotica. I’m obsessed.
June 10, 2024
“Now that you know how you look, how can you possibly stop looking?”
This was perfect—equally intelligent/introspective and sexy, I love this author.
This was perfect—equally intelligent/introspective and sexy, I love this author.
June 9, 2025
Wow. Hot and horny but sorta freaky and unsettling. Highly recommend. Read in one sitting
June 17, 2025
Freaky twin mirror book and honestly needed it to be 3x longer
July 22, 2025
An erotic psycho thriller examination of the dissolution self??? If you have even a couple hours to read this I would highly recommend.
August 19, 2025
Weird and erotic. Finished in a day. Now I’m contemplating the dissolution of self & doppelgängers. 🧐
Read
September 21, 2025sooo I guess there’s this thing called erotica that makes you think. More unsettling lesbian pyschosexual thriller novellas please
November 22, 2025
Nah wtf
June 20, 2024
"if there’s anything i’ve learned about myself it’s that i love to be consumed. i like to watch—i like to observe. i wonder if it makes me porous, my watchfulness, or if it’s just that i’m so conscious of being seen i try to render myself a perfect mirror."
some of the lines in here were just WOW
there were moments where i didn't feel smart enough to truly grasp what was going on here, sort of how i felt being in the mind of selin in elif batuman's THE IDIOT (ha ha ha); a little bit alienated but wholly invested and increasingly curious (furiously typing "who is jacques lacan" into the google search bar)
3.5
some of the lines in here were just WOW
there were moments where i didn't feel smart enough to truly grasp what was going on here, sort of how i felt being in the mind of selin in elif batuman's THE IDIOT (ha ha ha); a little bit alienated but wholly invested and increasingly curious (furiously typing "who is jacques lacan" into the google search bar)
3.5
Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews