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220 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1941
Man is alone in life. He’s alone in his cradle as he’ll be alone on his deadbeat; he’s alone in love…
It had been raining since dawn. Damp had made my room as foul-smelling as a cave and its light was really that of a crypt where I was moldering, looking at tears streaming down the window and feeling that I was gradually swelling up with water absorbed through my pores. It seemed that this rain would last forever. I was surrounded by a pervasive odor of old scrapheaps and, since everything smelled, my body emitted the smell that tramps carry in their rags. My thoughts, like a bottle imp, slowly sank under the pressure of the opaque sky. And this inexorable descent into the void constituted a palpable but unspeakably horrible torture. It is conceivable that a man in a room, unmoving and apparently impressive, could stand to feel his soul smothered without groaning, writhing, or praying?
Twilight fell on the countryside. Landscapes fled by and horses fled in reverse across the landscape. I closed my eyes on the image of horses fleeing through smoke or through foam. I was fleeing too, and I tried to remember why. The police, a woman, an enemy, the demon? No, the drama was simpler than that; I was only fleeing myself. It happens to everyone at least once to get sick of himself, of meeting his own face in the mirror. A perilous moment, because so clear is the mirror and so frozen the face that the time to flee has come; for it can explode, that culminating moment, and blow to bits both the human head and the mirror that contains it.