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What Men Don't Want Women To Know: The Secrets, The Lies, The Unspoken Truth
If you are a woman who deosn't want to know the truth about the men in you life, then put this book down immediately. Don't even think of reading further. But if you are a woman who believes that knowledge is power, that to be forewarned is to be forearmed, then Smith and Doe are here to give you an unvarnished, no-holds-barred, unadulterated first-time look into the mind of male animal. You will learn about their sexual fanatsies (the real ones), the secrets they keep, and the lies they tell when it comes to sex, love, and fidelity, and what they will and will not do to hole on to the women in their lives. But take heed. As Smith and Doe reveal : "Our sexual fantasies are everything you pray they are not. Our deepest desires are darker than your darkest fears. Our wet dreams are your worst nightmares." This is the book men pray women won't read.
164 pages, Hardcover
First published June 15, 1998
136 people are currently reading
2676 people want to read
About the author
Mike Smith
520 books55 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 90 reviews
June 22, 2024
Thank you Smith & Doe. Never will I ever trust another man. 4B4Ever 🫶🏻
November 9, 2012
OMG. I honestly don't know what to say about this beyond "What a piece of shit". I got it at the library on a whim...found it while looking up some relationship book just for the hell of it and ran across this, thinking it was some sort of informational book. After reading a few pages, I had to ask myself 2 questions: 1. What era was this written in? (Turns out it was 1998--I thought it was 1950...) 2. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
No shit. The crap in this book makes men look like supreme, total assholes with absolutely no restraint whatsoever, and it makes women look like subservient idiots. THEN I started to wonder if, in fact, it WAS supposed to be some sort of demented satire of a self-help book. Nada. These assholes seem to be taking this shit--and themselves--seriously. It appears that the "advice" in this is supposedly real. I don't believe this shit for a second. Sure, there ARE guys who this book applies to, but I don't believe that it applies to the majority. And the fact that it makes it the woman's responsibility to "keep your man happy" like women should be some sort of cross between June Cleaver and a whore in order to "keep" the type of man portrayed here makes me want to puke.
All this shit does is--falsely--tell you that men are basically whores with no purpose in life beyond satisfying what their dicks want, and that women need to realize this and satisfy whatever need they have--WHENEVER AND WHEREVER--in order to keep your man from fucking everything that moves when he's out of your supervision. Jeeze. Give me a break. It portrays men as completely selfish assholes with no more restraint than a fucking 2-year old where it comes to satisfying every sexual whim that "pops up" (pun intended), and that every second of their existence is spent being controlled by their baser reptilian brain that they are unable to reign in. Shit suggesting that they have to jack off every five minutes or die of blue balls---or find some whore to satisfy that need, unless that whore is YOU...
From what I understand, the book was written by two fucking assholes in the movie industry---okay, now, I BELIEVE that half of THOSE dickwads DO live like this in that great cesspool more commonly known as "Hollywierd", but NOT the majority of men in general--who base much of this on their own experiences. One of them now has gotten over his fucking "sexual addiction" (sorry---I call "BULLSHIT!"--this is NOT an addiction OR a disease...it's simply a fucking pathetic excuse for a lack of self-restraint and respect for your partner) and has done a 180 on being an asshole, taken up Buddhism, yada, yada, yada. Either way, this book does a HUGE disservice to both men and women alike. It's too difficult to figure out if this book is supposed to be listed under "humor" or self-help, but it's listed on here in the "humor" section---at my library, it was under the sexuality/advice/etc. section, NOT the humor section. IF you HAVE to read this shit, please don't waste any money on it--go check it out at the library. Actually, I've only skimmed through about 5 pages of this excrement, and I already know that it's unnecessary to read any further, which is why I've listed it as "read". The first page is the same as every other page, so save yourself the trouble and don't even bother, or, as I said previously, at least get it at tle library so you don't waste any money on this steaming dung heap.
I'm glad this is such an old book that I doubt it'll be read again by anyone, but in case it is, I feel sorry for anyone--younger women especially who DON'T have a clue as to what men are really like--who might read this and actually believe that every man on the planet is as disgusting as the pigs who wrote this piece of shit. It's sad, because for anyone taking this garbage seriously, it does men a great disservice.
No shit. The crap in this book makes men look like supreme, total assholes with absolutely no restraint whatsoever, and it makes women look like subservient idiots. THEN I started to wonder if, in fact, it WAS supposed to be some sort of demented satire of a self-help book. Nada. These assholes seem to be taking this shit--and themselves--seriously. It appears that the "advice" in this is supposedly real. I don't believe this shit for a second. Sure, there ARE guys who this book applies to, but I don't believe that it applies to the majority. And the fact that it makes it the woman's responsibility to "keep your man happy" like women should be some sort of cross between June Cleaver and a whore in order to "keep" the type of man portrayed here makes me want to puke.
All this shit does is--falsely--tell you that men are basically whores with no purpose in life beyond satisfying what their dicks want, and that women need to realize this and satisfy whatever need they have--WHENEVER AND WHEREVER--in order to keep your man from fucking everything that moves when he's out of your supervision. Jeeze. Give me a break. It portrays men as completely selfish assholes with no more restraint than a fucking 2-year old where it comes to satisfying every sexual whim that "pops up" (pun intended), and that every second of their existence is spent being controlled by their baser reptilian brain that they are unable to reign in. Shit suggesting that they have to jack off every five minutes or die of blue balls---or find some whore to satisfy that need, unless that whore is YOU...
From what I understand, the book was written by two fucking assholes in the movie industry---okay, now, I BELIEVE that half of THOSE dickwads DO live like this in that great cesspool more commonly known as "Hollywierd", but NOT the majority of men in general--who base much of this on their own experiences. One of them now has gotten over his fucking "sexual addiction" (sorry---I call "BULLSHIT!"--this is NOT an addiction OR a disease...it's simply a fucking pathetic excuse for a lack of self-restraint and respect for your partner) and has done a 180 on being an asshole, taken up Buddhism, yada, yada, yada. Either way, this book does a HUGE disservice to both men and women alike. It's too difficult to figure out if this book is supposed to be listed under "humor" or self-help, but it's listed on here in the "humor" section---at my library, it was under the sexuality/advice/etc. section, NOT the humor section. IF you HAVE to read this shit, please don't waste any money on it--go check it out at the library. Actually, I've only skimmed through about 5 pages of this excrement, and I already know that it's unnecessary to read any further, which is why I've listed it as "read". The first page is the same as every other page, so save yourself the trouble and don't even bother, or, as I said previously, at least get it at tle library so you don't waste any money on this steaming dung heap.
I'm glad this is such an old book that I doubt it'll be read again by anyone, but in case it is, I feel sorry for anyone--younger women especially who DON'T have a clue as to what men are really like--who might read this and actually believe that every man on the planet is as disgusting as the pigs who wrote this piece of shit. It's sad, because for anyone taking this garbage seriously, it does men a great disservice.
May 13, 2017
To be honest, as exaggerated as some of this sounds, it's based on a lot of general truths about men. I still use some of this "joking" advice even to this day. Like another reviewer said, assume all of these about a new guy, until you know better, and even then, you will never really know the truth. Cause they'd never admit to it. I think it's brilliant and one of a kind. You can't get this kind of straight forward, hard to believe, "hard truth" kind of advice in any regular self help books.
July 30, 2021
Feminist manifestos that call for the death of all men paint a more flattering picture of men than this book, yet the authors think what they write should convince women to try harder to keep a guy. Any guy that isn't hooking up with prostitutes, cheating on you or fantasizing about your daughter is apparently not a real man.
July 23, 2020
This book made me despise men !
Read
January 27, 2021First I laughed. Then I understood they were serious. "What a terrible, terrible book."
All girls, especially those who watch a lot of twilight and read a lot of love novels and have their dreams about finding the "one"/ finding the knight in white armor, should read this. The sad thing about this books is that you don't know where the irony begins. Best thing for a girl to do is to read the book. But remember that only a small part of her boy/her man is like the SMITH and DOE guy, which is described in the book. (It would actually be best for you to believe every single thing until you know for sure your guy belongs to "the weak minded fools" or you've trained him accordingly :D) What's described are deeply routed beliefs. I was extremely sad to get the truth in my face but that is part of the male nature. Discussing what's said in the book with a man will have little or no meaning - he'll never tell you it's true unless he's a "weak minded fool" as decent men are described in the book. Hell when I was asked about my sexual fantasies two week ago before I've read SMITH and DOE I didn't tell her squat. SMITH and DOE are right for many things.
Some things were shocking even for me. the belief that women are inferior and that a guy is with a girl because deep down inside him he thinks he can't do better for the moment. Look at porn, look at what happened to women in a few hundred years ago. Locked home, looking over the house, can't go out, doesn't have the rights of a man, just like a slave. There are even religions, who by my opinion treats women just as things, not even slaves.
A book full of terrible truths about the dark side of men. Just remember that at the end there are a few pages in which they tell you that they've been describing the worst possible case, which by the way would be relevant to a lot of people if men were to let themselves run free, let their (our) dark nature run free.
All girls, especially those who watch a lot of twilight and read a lot of love novels and have their dreams about finding the "one"/ finding the knight in white armor, should read this. The sad thing about this books is that you don't know where the irony begins. Best thing for a girl to do is to read the book. But remember that only a small part of her boy/her man is like the SMITH and DOE guy, which is described in the book. (It would actually be best for you to believe every single thing until you know for sure your guy belongs to "the weak minded fools" or you've trained him accordingly :D) What's described are deeply routed beliefs. I was extremely sad to get the truth in my face but that is part of the male nature. Discussing what's said in the book with a man will have little or no meaning - he'll never tell you it's true unless he's a "weak minded fool" as decent men are described in the book. Hell when I was asked about my sexual fantasies two week ago before I've read SMITH and DOE I didn't tell her squat. SMITH and DOE are right for many things.
Some things were shocking even for me. the belief that women are inferior and that a guy is with a girl because deep down inside him he thinks he can't do better for the moment. Look at porn, look at what happened to women in a few hundred years ago. Locked home, looking over the house, can't go out, doesn't have the rights of a man, just like a slave. There are even religions, who by my opinion treats women just as things, not even slaves.
A book full of terrible truths about the dark side of men. Just remember that at the end there are a few pages in which they tell you that they've been describing the worst possible case, which by the way would be relevant to a lot of people if men were to let themselves run free, let their (our) dark nature run free.
July 2, 2024
⚠️⚠️⚠️This book is not for women who can’t accept the hard truth about a man’s nature, if you can’t handle the truth don’t read this book. Thank y’all for risking y’all’s life to elevating us women!!💗
Read
July 23, 2024i don’t even know what to rate this. there are some hard truths that are difficult to accept but i don’t think this is an accurate representation of ALL males, as it claims to be. men are thinking and feeling beings just like women and instead of making excuses for fucking strippers and cheating on their wives, maybe we should hold men accountable for their actions? we all have free will people.
July 18, 2011
For all females who assume similarities between male and female sexuality that are in fact products of their own fantasy and failure to look more deeply into the matter - this book will help set you a bit straighter. I happened to read this one in Chinese translation, which gave me an education in all kinds of sexual terms I hadn't had occasion to encounter previously.
Want to read
April 9, 2025I saw a TikTok ab this book. Yeah this book seems to be a hella crazy.
March 8, 2025
What could I learn from this book ?
What NEW fact could I learn from this book ?
What we have learned about men since being a girl was through ourselves and other women’s lives. I gathered multiple questions throughout my teenage hood, here are some of them:
Why do men think that women are below them (intellectually, physically)?
Why do men cheat and justify with absurd reasons?
Why are men entitled to sex?
Why are men predators?
If I can be sure about one thing (amongst 1000 things), men are desperate to fit into the role of being a man. Don’t get confused, I am not asking you to have pity, men benefit from this EVERY TIME, ANYWHERE.
Unfortunately we are the opposite of masculinity. We are everything men despise, hate and should never become/resemble. Everything revolving around women is to be mocked, trashed and looked down at.
It is a little bit out of the place to think women never realized how shitty men are. But why do they keep engaging, marrying and finishing their lives with them? As you ask me, let me answer.
As we grow up, we understand that the main belief (worldwide) is a society where women should always sustain men. Depending on the country and the progress about women’s rights (and their role in society), they always have been taught manual things (cooking, cleaning,…) in order to be the perfect housewife once reaching adulthood. Some women never had the choice to concentrate on their life, their dreams and goals because someone else made sure to take them away.
This is where feminism can come into a great conversation about realizing that not every woman has rights and a government to ensure them; and that there are still privileged (white women for example) ones among the same minority (women).
Being a woman is like being picked on in a fight by a random person (that appears to be a man) who thinks that everything that you have done, are doing and will achieve will never reach the same greatness as theirs. And the important questions to ask here:
When the fuck did I ask?
Who the fuck did I ask?
Imagine a child bragging about their drawing to another one.
“You’ll never be as skilled as me, you and your friends !”
You can guess the reasons as to why this kid wants to bother someone:
The kid wants a reaction out of the other kid.
The kid feels insecure about his drawing and wants to feel better by picking at someone else.
The kid probably doesn't know how to socialize and has been used to pick at people in order to interact with them.
That’s how I see men. Bullies who never achieved to understand empathy before the age of 30, who never realize that women are not in competition with them and that women are smarter hence to why the insecurity.
Anyway, there are so many things to talk about but I’ll try to make it short.
Some things from the book:
1) Man, a sexual animal + Loaded vs Unloaded
I know, you know, we know. Men justify being a slut, a bitch in heat, by mentioning their libido. So hard for them to control themselves right ? Even animals can’t escape their never ending sexual arousal, golly gee!
But in the book, the author convinces women to stick up with their husbands, even if they are the reincarnation of
Men have so much libido and it’s vital to be “unloaded”.
“If you know how to please your man, he will never leave you!”
Why would I bother myself to keep a dog on a leash, contracting every single muscle of my body so that my dog would not bite (for the 309th time) a passerby during my promenade ? Sorry let me rephrase it: Why would I bother myself to keep my man on a leash so that my man would not cheat (for the 309th time) on me ?
The women who act like this, unfortunately, don’t see any other choice than sticking up with a piece of shit.
Don’t overdo yourself just because you’re scared he’ll leave you. Leave him first❤️
It’s a save of time, money and mental despair.
I don’t think this is a book made for women to gather red flags for upcoming relationships. The author helps the woman to recognize the mediocre, disgusting behaviors of her man.
Yet, he wrote this book as a “men are men, you have to accept this and stick by them”. Yes, men are men that’s why not engaging with them could be the perfect remedy for us. The only thing that they could care about is infantility rates as they go down; maybe if you were a decent human being women could give some of their time.
4B girls that’s the way😽
What NEW fact could I learn from this book ?
What we have learned about men since being a girl was through ourselves and other women’s lives. I gathered multiple questions throughout my teenage hood, here are some of them:
Why do men think that women are below them (intellectually, physically)?
Why do men cheat and justify with absurd reasons?
Why are men entitled to sex?
Why are men predators?
If I can be sure about one thing (amongst 1000 things), men are desperate to fit into the role of being a man. Don’t get confused, I am not asking you to have pity, men benefit from this EVERY TIME, ANYWHERE.
Unfortunately we are the opposite of masculinity. We are everything men despise, hate and should never become/resemble. Everything revolving around women is to be mocked, trashed and looked down at.
It is a little bit out of the place to think women never realized how shitty men are. But why do they keep engaging, marrying and finishing their lives with them? As you ask me, let me answer.
As we grow up, we understand that the main belief (worldwide) is a society where women should always sustain men. Depending on the country and the progress about women’s rights (and their role in society), they always have been taught manual things (cooking, cleaning,…) in order to be the perfect housewife once reaching adulthood. Some women never had the choice to concentrate on their life, their dreams and goals because someone else made sure to take them away.
This is where feminism can come into a great conversation about realizing that not every woman has rights and a government to ensure them; and that there are still privileged (white women for example) ones among the same minority (women).
Being a woman is like being picked on in a fight by a random person (that appears to be a man) who thinks that everything that you have done, are doing and will achieve will never reach the same greatness as theirs. And the important questions to ask here:
When the fuck did I ask?
Who the fuck did I ask?
Imagine a child bragging about their drawing to another one.
“You’ll never be as skilled as me, you and your friends !”
You can guess the reasons as to why this kid wants to bother someone:
The kid wants a reaction out of the other kid.
The kid feels insecure about his drawing and wants to feel better by picking at someone else.
The kid probably doesn't know how to socialize and has been used to pick at people in order to interact with them.
That’s how I see men. Bullies who never achieved to understand empathy before the age of 30, who never realize that women are not in competition with them and that women are smarter hence to why the insecurity.
Anyway, there are so many things to talk about but I’ll try to make it short.
Some things from the book:
1) Man, a sexual animal + Loaded vs Unloaded
I know, you know, we know. Men justify being a slut, a bitch in heat, by mentioning their libido. So hard for them to control themselves right ? Even animals can’t escape their never ending sexual arousal, golly gee!
But in the book, the author convinces women to stick up with their husbands, even if they are the reincarnation of
Men have so much libido and it’s vital to be “unloaded”.
“If you know how to please your man, he will never leave you!”
Why would I bother myself to keep a dog on a leash, contracting every single muscle of my body so that my dog would not bite (for the 309th time) a passerby during my promenade ? Sorry let me rephrase it: Why would I bother myself to keep my man on a leash so that my man would not cheat (for the 309th time) on me ?
The women who act like this, unfortunately, don’t see any other choice than sticking up with a piece of shit.
Don’t overdo yourself just because you’re scared he’ll leave you. Leave him first❤️
It’s a save of time, money and mental despair.
I don’t think this is a book made for women to gather red flags for upcoming relationships. The author helps the woman to recognize the mediocre, disgusting behaviors of her man.
Yet, he wrote this book as a “men are men, you have to accept this and stick by them”. Yes, men are men that’s why not engaging with them could be the perfect remedy for us. The only thing that they could care about is infantility rates as they go down; maybe if you were a decent human being women could give some of their time.
4B girls that’s the way😽
Read
October 12, 20244B fuel
August 3, 2024
A bitter truth.
Honestly even though the author wrote it any “joking” way but you know they are serious about it cause if they wrote it in normal, some women would probably cannot take it.As someone who grow with a single dad, the authors advices and dad advice really align pretty much especially about money and men “trust”.
Even though I saw some women commenting that things have change but honest does it? We still majority ruled by men,and the number of women got killed,ra*e*,abused and manipulated still no difference from back then.
I guess the only way to survive in this world is just by stay away from men and go hiding I guess.
Honestly even though the author wrote it any “joking” way but you know they are serious about it cause if they wrote it in normal, some women would probably cannot take it.As someone who grow with a single dad, the authors advices and dad advice really align pretty much especially about money and men “trust”.
Even though I saw some women commenting that things have change but honest does it? We still majority ruled by men,and the number of women got killed,ra*e*,abused and manipulated still no difference from back then.
I guess the only way to survive in this world is just by stay away from men and go hiding I guess.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 29, 2024
i need to throw up
also i hate how they keep saying things like “this is the nature of men” and “don’t blame him, he can’t help it” and the pseudoscience which i can’t tell if it’s satire or not (e.g. “Smith/Doe Perceptual Loading Syndrome”)
also i hate how they keep saying things like “this is the nature of men” and “don’t blame him, he can’t help it” and the pseudoscience which i can’t tell if it’s satire or not (e.g. “Smith/Doe Perceptual Loading Syndrome”)
June 2, 2011
Rubbish. I hope it was just simply bad satire rather than a self help book.
November 4, 2013
What a colossal waste of time.
July 18, 2021
Really funny and informative.
December 4, 2022
Lol. It's harsh, but true.
April 14, 2025
Interesting read.
I had to drop the book for some time in order to give myself time to digest it.
Smith and Doe have put together something here that is their own reconciliation of the data that they have collected over the years. I will not discount it and at the same time, I will say it shrouding be taken as gospel.
Obviously there are nuances to everyone’s perspective and situation.
I can see how the book can be helpful for some and how it can be harmful for some.
I don’t think some of the stuff they recommended in this book are necessary as it could easily cause an individual to become paranoid or insecure.
It is one of those books that you read and don’t really think much of until someone brings it up randomly and you acknowledge you’ve read it.
I had to drop the book for some time in order to give myself time to digest it.
Smith and Doe have put together something here that is their own reconciliation of the data that they have collected over the years. I will not discount it and at the same time, I will say it shrouding be taken as gospel.
Obviously there are nuances to everyone’s perspective and situation.
I can see how the book can be helpful for some and how it can be harmful for some.
I don’t think some of the stuff they recommended in this book are necessary as it could easily cause an individual to become paranoid or insecure.
It is one of those books that you read and don’t really think much of until someone brings it up randomly and you acknowledge you’ve read it.
Read
March 28, 2025I should delete tiktok again
August 9, 2024
All I will say, is that there are more valuable ideas to this book than most people are willing to admit. That, and the last 20 or so pages were surprisingly helpful and, at the very end, kind of wholesome.
September 5, 2024
I read this book to get a deeper understanding on the male brain but instead it made me realize they are literal animals!
Read
July 25, 2024I don’t know how to feel about this book
March 3, 2025
Read it in an hour after seeing a tiktok about it, It's an old book, not sure how I feel about it!
August 3, 2025
Such an interest and educative book for women out there.
Read
June 13, 2025Un poco más misandrica que ayer pero menos que mañana
May 22, 2025
It’s not a book for women to take advice from, it’s another form of directing women and controlling them. Here’s from a direct quote, “Never send your man into a target-rich environment in the loaded state” (Smith, 29). He goes onto say you MUST give your husband or boyfriend an orgasm before he goes off into the work field or he’ll essentially cheat on you—this makes it the lady’s responsibility and blames her for his infidelity. What kind of bullshit is that? I’m sure many men fall into these categories but saying he’s having wet dreams about your daughter? What? They constantly justify the what ifs as if men are animals and trust me, I’m not a male apologist, but plenty of them are not.
It’s published as the liberation of women yet what it truly does is mean to enslave them by pushing all of these burdens and faults onto them. Don’t waste your time and all of the women here praising it just want a source for their (honestly, justified) hatred towards the male sex, when the author is not here to help you.
Just to show you I’m not lying, here are actual excerpts.
“To illustrate: If your man goes to work loaded, he will inevitably seek a target at which to discharge this load. Unless he's a mo (the SMITH AND DOE clinical term for homosex-ual), this target will be a A wOMAN. A man's target-seeking pattern invariably takes the course of looking AT other women, fantasizing ABOUT other women, and, if he's really lucky, unloading In (or on) other women. On the other hand: If your man goes to work unloaded, having just had a righteously Reichian orgasm, he won't even want to TALK to other women—he simply couldn't be bothered” (Smith, 29).
“Have you ever heard of a man cheating because he gets too much sex at home? Can you fathom a man telling his male cohorts he's going on a fake business trip with a beautiful young assistant because he's getting too many great blowjobs from the Mrs” (Smith, 30).?
It’s published as the liberation of women yet what it truly does is mean to enslave them by pushing all of these burdens and faults onto them. Don’t waste your time and all of the women here praising it just want a source for their (honestly, justified) hatred towards the male sex, when the author is not here to help you.
Just to show you I’m not lying, here are actual excerpts.
“To illustrate: If your man goes to work loaded, he will inevitably seek a target at which to discharge this load. Unless he's a mo (the SMITH AND DOE clinical term for homosex-ual), this target will be a A wOMAN. A man's target-seeking pattern invariably takes the course of looking AT other women, fantasizing ABOUT other women, and, if he's really lucky, unloading In (or on) other women. On the other hand: If your man goes to work unloaded, having just had a righteously Reichian orgasm, he won't even want to TALK to other women—he simply couldn't be bothered” (Smith, 29).
“Have you ever heard of a man cheating because he gets too much sex at home? Can you fathom a man telling his male cohorts he's going on a fake business trip with a beautiful young assistant because he's getting too many great blowjobs from the Mrs” (Smith, 30).?
December 20, 2024
I was on board with the concept for the first few chapters, then I felt manipulated, and after a few chapters it became full on toxic.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 6, 2023
What a book! I'm going to start off by listing the things I like and don't like about this book. I know it was written quite a while ago now so though some parts are outdated, there are some drops of truth. I want to give it a 2.5/5 stars but let's leave it at a 2.
What I liked:
- There are some nuggets of truth here and there that I truly believe in.
- Really made me ponder how broken men really are! Are all men cheaters and as devious as described?
- I think the biggest takeaway that a woman can learn from this book is that men are fundamentally different from us and that's probably a good thing.
What I didn't like:
- The book contradicts at parts, especially near the end about men and money. For instance, the authors will say that women shouldn't be used by 'loser' (a man with no money or ambitions) for their money, but then claims that the best case scenario is when both a man and woman have their own money, so that the [wealthy] man can use or combine their money to generate more of it, and there is very vague detail on that part. Then goes on to say that women should go dutch or pay for dates, buy men gifts every couple months etc. so that he will have more incentive to provide for her and she will never pay for a date in the future (i.e., you intend to pay for the date, he will refuse and want to pay, but you must insist anyway). I don't know if the culture changed, but men certainly in this generation would love for you to pay or split on a date lmao much less take you out for coffee if they can.
- Crass language. Even by standards of the 90s it's very unnecessarily prawnographically crass, and I think get's a bit more coarse later on into the book when explaining women randomly. It makes the book uncomfortable to read because of the excessiveness, and it actually gets worse as you read it. I could see this book being too hard for some women to read. The explanation of loaded vs. unloaded state for example, while has it's truth could have been described in a less disturbing way. Is that age vs. unload time graph really scientific?
- Authors claim their research which at times seems almost scientific but likely anecdotal is the truth and nothing but the truth. If your man doesn't operate on this mindset according to the authors he's either gay, regretful, or lying.
- There are a couple things here that I would also stick to women as well, particularly with the imaginary infidelity, fantasies and sexual deviance. Like hello, erotic romance novels, TV, films etc.? We want to live vicariously through theses characters for a reason lmao
What I liked:
- There are some nuggets of truth here and there that I truly believe in.
- Really made me ponder how broken men really are! Are all men cheaters and as devious as described?
- I think the biggest takeaway that a woman can learn from this book is that men are fundamentally different from us and that's probably a good thing.
What I didn't like:
- The book contradicts at parts, especially near the end about men and money. For instance, the authors will say that women shouldn't be used by 'loser' (a man with no money or ambitions) for their money, but then claims that the best case scenario is when both a man and woman have their own money, so that the [wealthy] man can use or combine their money to generate more of it, and there is very vague detail on that part. Then goes on to say that women should go dutch or pay for dates, buy men gifts every couple months etc. so that he will have more incentive to provide for her and she will never pay for a date in the future (i.e., you intend to pay for the date, he will refuse and want to pay, but you must insist anyway). I don't know if the culture changed, but men certainly in this generation would love for you to pay or split on a date lmao much less take you out for coffee if they can.
- Crass language. Even by standards of the 90s it's very unnecessarily prawnographically crass, and I think get's a bit more coarse later on into the book when explaining women randomly. It makes the book uncomfortable to read because of the excessiveness, and it actually gets worse as you read it. I could see this book being too hard for some women to read. The explanation of loaded vs. unloaded state for example, while has it's truth could have been described in a less disturbing way. Is that age vs. unload time graph really scientific?
- Authors claim their research which at times seems almost scientific but likely anecdotal is the truth and nothing but the truth. If your man doesn't operate on this mindset according to the authors he's either gay, regretful, or lying.
- There are a couple things here that I would also stick to women as well, particularly with the imaginary infidelity, fantasies and sexual deviance. Like hello, erotic romance novels, TV, films etc.? We want to live vicariously through theses characters for a reason lmao
March 7, 2025
I’ve held off reading this book for over a year because as someone who seeks the truth in narratives I already knew reading this would make my outlooks on situations/relationships even more pessimistic. For a bit, I thought I had somehow finally found a male that I considered good and respectable, but males will ALWAYS be males. So I finally read this book. EVERYTHING in this book has been things I’ve already recognized and mostly accepted. Still save yourself the disappointment sooner by educating yourself and accepting the reality.
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