This collection of essays on motherhood from the Coffee + Crumbs blog had me smiling, laughing and crying as I related to so many of the vast emotions of motherhood that are so eloquently described by various authors. I loved the Christian flavor of many of them and the birds-eye view of these challenges that remind us what one huge goal of motherhood is—our own personal journey in sanctification.
Not only is the writing beautiful and thought provoking but the book itself is so beautifully presented with gorgeous photography which also highlight some of the best quotes in each essay. The short post style of the book also makes it easy to read in small chunks between all of the mothering activities.
Some of my favorite quotes:
P. 12 Written by a new mother trying to juggle her passions and family, her husband reminds her, “You are always a mother. You are not only a mother.”
P. 14 I loved this entire essay about the seasons of motherhood that we wish away due to the discomfort but then wish to have back as our children grow.
P. 25 “There’s something you need to know. You are not weak if you need backup. You aren’t needy if you ask you husband to take a late-night diaper change... Mothers—whether we stay at home, work from home, work full time or work overtime—are managing a whole lot of crazy. And sometimes we need help. And I began recognizing my own needs, a very special thing happened: I also started noticing others’ needs in a way I hadn’t before. The more I’ve said yes to help, the better I’ve become at offering it to others.
P. 43 This essay starts with the child stating that her mother was like Wonder Woman because, “she doesn’t have any weapons. Just her arms and her legs, and she wonders a lot.”
“In my never-ending quest to quip myself with better tools and better systems, I had overlooked the fact that I had myself. Not just my arms and my legs, but my character, my sense of humor, my passion, and my bottomless love for my kids. In my desire for control, I had lost sight of the value of curiosity, and wondering. I was aiming far too low. I was aiming for order instead of wonder, mastery instead of stewardship, a certificate of achievement instead of an invitation for growth. I don’t want to be supermom anymore. I want to be Wonder Woman.”
P. 58 All about the forgiveness and quick forgetfulness of children when they are wronged, “...forgiving me left and right, teaching me what it means to be saved.”
P. 60 On developing body image in our girls, “I do not know how to vaccinate my daughters against the plague of self-hatred that runs rampant among young girls. But to my daughters, I will beg, ‘Fall in love with yourself, first.’ And I do not mean a tolerant, conditional, praise-yourself-when-you-look-good kind of love. I mean deeply rooted, white-hot, irrevocable, laugh-at-yourself love.”
P. 70 “I think savoring every moment is too much pressure. But I’m scooping up the moments worth savoring.”
P. 71 I very much related to this glitter and glue analogy of different parenting types and how each is important and complement each other.
P. 79 Regarding raising a strong-willed toddler which goes against all the ideals and rose-colored glasses we dream up before it gets hard, “I liked the real version of motherhood better than the fairy tale anyway, because the real version was forcing me to be smaller so God could get bigger.” “A mom I didn’t want to be. But the mom she needs.”
P. 87 On the topic of miscarriage and stillbirth not “adding up” “I held tight to the God who had to tell me over and over I was not a bad math problem. I was, I am, a story.”
P. 101 “We lose trust that He will show up at the right time, with the right lunch, just as promised. Both that’s silly, really, because my belief in God is not one of blind faith. I can see His consistent, loving character in the words of my Bible....And in the moments when I do let her down—because I will continue to, despite my best efforts—I’m thankful to know that while I might not always be mom enough, God will always be big enough. He can always be trusted. He’s always on time. He will always show up, for her and for me.”
P. 108 “Unlike us, our Heavenly Father is not prone to accidents or even capable of making mistakes. His love for HIs children is full, whole, and divinely perfect. I never understood how loved I was by God until I became a mother and realized this truth: the love I have for my children pales in comparison to the love God has for me. Just thinking about that takes my breath away.”
“You are more than your worst day. You are more than your biggest mistake.”
P. 127 “So much of motherhood is waiting, but so much of motherhood is also hoping, believing, and loving the work right in front of us. Just as the weather forecast isn’t always predictable or what we planned for, motherhood might also change our plans in every way. But that doesn’t have to change the kind of momma I am. Not when I have a God who never changes. The glory of our good, good Father shines bright in any weather. All we have to do is put on our rain jackets and go look for it.”
P. 160 “She is the daughter of the King—not ours to own, but all of ours to love.”
P. 189 On raising special needs children, “This child is going to be exactly who he is, and it’s not going to be an accident. It’s going to be hard and it’s going to be beautiful, no matter how many chromosomes he’s born with. He’s going to teach me a lot of things, and I’m going to be better for knowing him—exactly the way he is.”
P. 202 On pregnancy after miscarriage, “Help my hopelessness, my unbelief. God, keep this tiny heart beating. God, give me a reckless heart.”
P. 219 On the days where nothing on the to-do list gets done, “You’ll be tempted to call it wasted. But it’s their day too.”
P. 229 On seeing and savoring the birth of a 3rd child with all the familiar, “I may know how to birth and breastfeed and burp you, but I still have so much to learn about how to mother you. And I can’t wait for the honor of fulfilling such a mighty task. Because you, my child, are a sacred gift that will only come around this time around.”