Believe Me: My Battle with the Invisible Disability of Lyme Disease

by Yolanda Hadid

From the star of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills comes an emotional and eye opening behind-the-scenes look at her descent into uncovering the mystery of chronic Lyme disease.In early 2011, Yolanda was struck by mysterious symptoms including brain fog, severe exhaustion, migraines and more. Over the months and years that followed, she went from being an outspoken, multi-tasking, hands-on mother of three, reality TV star, and social butterfly, to a woman who spent most of her time in bed. Yolanda was turned inside out by some of the country’s top hospitals and doctors, but due to the lack of definitive diagnostic testing, she landed in a dark maze of conflicting medical opinions, where many were quick to treat her symptoms but could never provide clear answers to their possible causes.In this moving, behind the scenes memoir, Yolanda Hadid opens up in a way she has never been able to in the media before. Suffering from late stage Lyme, a disease that is an undeniable epidemic and more debilitating than anyone realizes, Yolanda had to fight with everything she had to hold onto her life. While her struggle was lived publicly, it impacted her privately in every aspect of her existence, affecting her family, friends and professional prospects. Her perfect marriage became strained and led to divorce. It was the strong bond with her children, Gigi, Bella and Anwar, that provided her greatest motivation to fight through the darkest days of her life. Hers is an emotional narrative and all-important read for anyone unseated by an unexpected catastrophe. With candor, authenticity and an unwavering inner strength, Yolanda reveals intimate details of her journey crisscrossing the world to find answers for herself and two of her children who suffer from Lyme and shares her tireless research into eastern and western medicine. Believe Me is an inspiring lesson in the importance of having courage and hope, even in those moments when you think you can’t go on.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Health, Biography, Autobiography, Disability, Biography Memoir

312 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 12, 2017

Reviews

[Rissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think that if you dont have Lyme or any chronic illness you will not enjoy this but... since I have lyme along with many other problems I loved this.

One of my favorite things she said (i tabbed up the whole book) was
“Anyone can fake being sick but, it takes a great talent to fake being well and smile when you feel like shit”
That is so ture that it hurts. Her book was beautiful and raw and real and painful and I loved it.



I will have a full video review up soon that talks more in depth.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7dhWAYN...

[Jenn · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book for people who are battling Lyme, like myself, to read for many reasons. A ton of treatment protocols are discussed and I learned a lot. That being said I don't know that she gave each treatment she tried enough time to work before going onto the next one but either way everyone reacts differently and what works for Yolanda may not work for someone else and vice versa. She also didn't change her diet to a strict "Lyme Diet" right off the bat when she was doing some of these treatments which is often one of the first things people with Lyme and co-infections change as soon as they are diagnosed so I can't help but wonder if those treatments weren't as effective because of that but I digress.
The book still gives you good insight into treatments that aren't the easiest for everyone to try (whether it be cost, location, access to certain doctors, etc) and things I've never even heard of. I know Yolanda basically has unlimited funds so some things are completely unrealistic for people to do but the reality is Lyme treatment is incredibly expensive. Unfairly expensive. People lose their homes and go into tremendous debt because of it but maybe there will be one treatment in here that feels right to you and you can research and work towards (possibly raise money to do) or maybe you are fortunate enough to try a few things, so although a lot of people think she isn't relatable because of that I still think you can get something out of this book. Even if it's only the fact that she isn't giving up on raising money for proper testing that is accessible and to find a cure that's afford to all...
I also think it is a great book for loved ones of people with Lyme disease so you can get an idea of what that person goes through, mentality and physically, on a daily basis since most of the time "You don't get it, until you (actually) GET it". A lot of times you can look fine on the outside (or in a photo someone sees) so people don't understand what's happening underneath it all or the crash you experience after the smallest tasks or the short time of feeling somewhat ok (which is usually when people see you). There is also a lot of information on the Lyme epidemic which is important for everyone to know about since there is a lot of false information out there.
Unlike the other Lyme books I read this one has a lot of information but at the same time it's nice to hear it in the voice of someone who knows your pain (but gives you hope) and it's a much more enjoyable read since there are a lot of stories from her life that she shares so it's not too dense and technical which can be hard to clearly understand when you have Lyme brain ;)
There's always the audiobook for people who have trouble reading or even holding a book because of the disease.
I loved the book and bought copies (which I will highlight certain spots) for my family to read :)

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yolanda Hadid's book Believe Me, is an informative memoir of her struggles with Lymes Disease and some of the other issues that occured in her life, as she was dealing with getting a diagnosis and her "health journey" from that point forward. As a Lyme sufferer, this book reminded me of some things I already knew, and opened my eyes to new infromation that I had never come into contact with. The desire of Hadid to find a cure that could be affordable for all endears Hadid to all of us that struggle to pay to simply see a doctor for an evaluation, let alone have the ability to fly to other countries for a variety of treatments, many of which did not appear to work for Ms. Hadid. While reading the book, it became impossible not to cheer Hadid's victories and cry through her sorrows. The sheer number of people she was close to who also share the same diagnosis is mind blowing, given the statistics around the disease. What struck me most, is the willingness with which Hadid shared her story, knowing that some would scoff at her, thinking her crazy, while others would know the amount of truth and heart she poured into every line of the book. This reader loved that someone put it all out there, so that others could feel less alone and still others could learn just how much this illness tears apart a person's body and their life in one fell swoop. This is a book everyone should read, regardless of their personal knowledge or connection to Lyme, as it will be eye opening for all.

[Tan Markovic · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was SO good.

[Mads · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars. Thank you to my aunt and uncle for sending this book to me!

I have two major takeaways:

1. Yolanda Hadid has tried the widest variety of treatments [for Lyme, etc] in the farthest reaching corners of the world of anyone I have ever heard of. As a result, I'm grateful for her documentation: what worked, what didn't work, what she'd file under "waste of money." Everyone responds radically different to Lyme treatment, so I kept an open mind throughout but I'm appreciative that Yolanda has taken the time and money to try things those of us with limited resources might not be able to.

2. I respect Yolanda more. To be perfectly honest, I've been limiting my exposure to Lyme-related news lately because it can be so wretchedly exhausting. That said, I want to keep my ears and eyes open to legitimately good sources of information and I think Yolanda has provided some support here. Her work is obviously NOT intended to replace that of a doctor's counsel, but (see #1) her experiences lend a helping hand to those of us who worry that we've run out of options. I'm also wary of public figures but Yo is honest and truthful about her experiences (good/bad/ugly). I get the sense she's far less artificial than I assumed she might be (my own prejudices speaking), and I feel I respect her more as a person after getting a sense of who she really is and what her thought processes are like.

Yo's book is not fabulous literature, but she's struggling with Lyme-brain and she even mentions that she is not a true "author" in the traditional sense. Hell, the piece might even be half-ghost written. She sometimes sinks into cliché, but then again, this is an outlet for her story, an effort to show other Lyme sufferers that they are not alone. Overall though, I felt it helpful and an easy read.

[Benedikt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yolanda Hadid writes about her battle with chronic Lyme Disease in this book. She describes the story of her illness in great detail and provides valuable information about the disease, its severe impacts on people's lives and the treatments that helped her to get her life back. Her story is very inspiring and motivating for people like myself, who are directly affected by chronic Lyme Disease. My own story is very similar to hers and I can relate to almost everything she explains in this book. I often encounter people who don't understand the condition and what I'm going through. I can say with certainty that Yo-Yo did a great job at explaining it all, and from now on I will recommend her book to people who want to know more. Yolanda is a godsend for the Lyme community and the associated unbelievable suffering that's happening around the world. She uses her celebritiy status to raise awareness for a horrible condition that desperately needs it and deserves a lot of respect for sharing her own story and a significant amount of private information to help others. Thank you, Yolanda!

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I hope that she can get the help she needs.

[Elisabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

“Chapter 9. You can break down a woman temporarily. But a real woman will always pick up the pieces, rebuild herself, and come back even stronger than ever.” And with that I have deleted this audiobook from my phone. I can’t do this anymore. I’m in the throes of illness and it’s not pretty. I don’t want to hear that real women pick themselves up or fight relentlessly or are gracefully sick or are everyone’s heroes. I can’t be the only sick person that isn’t the constant source of inspiration. Thanks for also rubbing in how incredibly strong and helpful and ever present your support network is. I don’t know who this book is for (healthy people that want to be inspired and reassured that getting your life taken away by illness would really only be a bump on their road to inner fortitude?) but it’s not helping me. Delete.

[Leigh Kramer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Yolanda was one of my favorite RHOBH cast members and I was often concerned about the different treatments she received for her Lyme disease while filming. But I was also concerned by the non-compassionate way most of her castmates treated her, particularly when one accused her of Munchausen. I don't know a ton about Lyme but even I knew there was no way Yolanda was faking her illness. This book is her way of controlling the narrative around her illness and educating the world. Reading about how long it took for Yolanda to receive a diagnosis and then the many avenues she took toward healing was heartbreaking. She's done a ton to raise awareness about the disease. At the same time, I kept wondering how many of the doctors/treatments Yolanda tried were legit and how many were taking advantage of desperate patients. There weren't many clear answers around this and Yolanda takes great pains to clarify how her ability to try so many things was due to her privilege and she also goes out of her way to help other patients who are less financially able.

There is some great behind the scenes about RHOBH, which made me want to rewatch her early seasons, and there are some insights into the demise of her marriage to David Foster. I was not impressed with him toward the end of his time on the show and even less so after reading this. If you're curious about Lyme or Yolanda's experience on RHOBH, this is well worth reading.

[Rhonda Lomazow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yolanda Hadid a gorgeous strong woman a mom a newlywed living a beautiful life ahome in Malibu her new husband David Foster the talented extremely successful music producer.Yolanda seems to have it all.Then one day she notices she is not feeling well she gets sicker&sicker Yolanda shares with us her desperate search for answers that will take her around the world from dr.to dr.Finally she is diagnosed with Lyme disease.Her illness will change her life in sad ways But Yolanda is a survivor.Early galley from NetGalley,

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this in 3 days and ate up every detail. My admiration just went up another 10 notches for Yolanda. A woman with a deep soul.

[Elizabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

I have tremendous empathy for those suffering from lyme disease and chronic illness. It is a horrible feeling to know that there is something wrong in your body, and to have the medical community not be able to recognize and alleviate what is happening to you. I think this issue is much more far reaching than most of us realize, and is growing as quickly and insidiously as ASD and celiac disease. It is for this reason that I decided to read "Believe Me".

This is only my opinion, but I believe Yolanda Hadid's self indulgent and haphazard approach to addressing her personal issues did a terrible disservice to the millions of people suffering from chronic illnesses like lyme disease. She said repeatedly throughout the book that her goal was to help other lyme sufferers alleviate or eliminate their symptoms, but the therapies she attempts in this book are almost all completely out of reach for most people. Do you have the time to take 150 pills a day to boost your immune system? Do you have the resources to jet off to Mexico, Europe, and Bali for different therapies in the hopes that they will work? There was not one single suggestion she made in this book that would be helpful to someone who does not make a six figure salary, or who works a full time job.

I always liked Yolanda on RHOBH, and decided to read this book because I thought she was inspirational. I respect her much less now, and feel like she does not have the capacity for real introspection. I always thought David Foster was a jackass, but I now feel like him insisting that she get a full body scan - which is what identified all the ruptured breast implant silicone in her body - is the thing that ultimately cured her issues and saved her life. I wish I could say that some of her more spiritual or unusual therapies did anything to help, because I think many of us would like to say that the universe cured us, but this is simply not the case.

[Lindsay · Rating 5 out of 5]

First of all, I had to put aside my preconceived ideas about a reality tv star and former model living it up in Beverly Hills and come to terms with the fact that Yolanda Hadid has suffered greatly.

Lyme disease is incredibly debilitating. I was also diagnosed with Chronic late stage Lyme and coinfections 2 months before this book was released. I feel that this book came into my life at the perfect time. Her struggles and pain, her joy and tears, all resonate so deeply within me. I’m so happy to see someone with a large platform and worldwide following spreading awareness for this silent killing disease. So many of the things in this book touched my heart as I have experienced similar symptoms and situations. Her love for her children, her strong sense of independence, and her giving nature. Those that are not sick may not appreciate her journey as much as those of us who deal with chronic illness every waking and sleeping minute of each day.

Yolanda begins with a brief history of her childhood and the loss of her father at a young age. She explains her symptoms and quest for a diagnosis after years of fatigue while traveling and modeling around the world. She goes into great detail about the various treatments she tries, the love and support from her children and friends and her hope to find a cure for all those suffering from Lyme as well as ALS. I learned a lot about various treatments I had never heard of and gained insight into potential protocols and paths to wellness. I laughed, I cried and I found great joy in knowing there is a strong community of Lyme warriors who all want the same thing: to come together and find a cure.

I give this raw and emotional book 5 stars because it is vital for the world to know the many faces of Lyme disease and the warriors who are fighting it every day.

[Christina · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's embarrassing to admit, but I learned about Lyme disease from The Real World: Seattle and The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. This was a quick, honest, fascinating read with some medical information that went over my head, but I applaud Yolanda's desire to use her platform to educate and advocate. It serves as a great reminder that there are so many people who suffer from chronic conditions and invisible illnesses.

[Allison · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a quick, interesting read for me. Yolanda shares more than I expected. It’s amazing the things she has done to try to cure her Lyme disease. I think anyone with a chronic illness could benefit from this honest, detailed book.

[Mediaman · Rating 2 out of 5]

This horribly-told story of illness is not just about Yolanda but about her kids sicknesses too! The diseases and troubles never seem to stop in this family. The pages are filled with depressing details and hopeless trips to doctors all over the world. And the fact that a rich woman whose friends have private jets she uses can't look at her life to figure out her problems makes the whole thing almost worthless. It's a one-star book that will only be of value to someone with some of Hadid's symptoms (therefore the second star). For everyone else, you don't need to wallow in the sad story.

It could have been told much differently. Instead of going day-by-day, moment-by-moment (including details about when she threw up, what popped out of her rear end, and how each medical professional came up with a different idea), the book could have been cut in half with a summary of some of her symptoms combined over a period of five years. Why the need to tell us the same sick stories over and over again, year after year?

If you're looking for insights into the Real Housewives franchise there is almost nothing here. A few pages at the most. Her childhood and early modeling years also don't get much attention, and her marriage to Hadid takes up a few paragraphs. In the end I felt like I still barely knew her, but knew a lot about the times she spent in the bathroom.

She claims it's a "spiritual" journey but there's nothing spiritual about this. She may allude to past life, odd foreign ceremonies, and meeting with a fortune-telling angel, but 99% of this journey is about her medical issues and how she dealt with them. Think of how boring it is for you to hear your elderly grandma repeat the same gross illness details repeatedly and multiply that by 300 pages.

Her cheery way of approaching life doesn't help. She's extremely naive, makes a lot of bad choices, and never analyzes the actions of herself or others. She looks for a simplistic solution that never arrives. She does whatever her selfish husband wants her to do, then always gets sick, only to be dumped by the guy when her "sick card" is used up! (David Foster gets royally thrown under the bus here and this book supports his reputation for being a complete self-centered jerk). Namely, it's a story of a woman who is out of touch with herself and how she needs to stop being so nice in order to save herself. But she can't even draw that conclusion from her own life.

It's unclear whether her story will help anyone else. Between parasites and getting rid of fillings and trying banned substances and jetting around the world, most of what she writes won't be relatable to anyone. If you have Lyme disease you may want to venture in to discover her dozens of failed attempts at a cure. Otherwise don't read this and don't believe Yolanda Hadid.

[Kit · Rating 1 out of 5]

Honestly, I DNF at around 50%.

I mean. Props to someone with chronic illness giving voice to her experience with it. Its always a difficult thing.

But my goodness. First of all, myself and many other chronically ill folk do NOT have bonkers amounts of money to just. Use for everything all the time so easily. She here will just...go to a treatment clinic across the country...or a doctor in another country (in a private jet!) and stay there in hotels, then come home and do it all again. Treatments and hospital stays she speaks of as difficult when for the average person, it could completely bankrupt them. I can't relate to someone trying to find a cure when they have seemingly unlimited funds to do so. The rest of us cannot just try an experimental treatment in Europe or Mexico or Bali. It's impossible. She makes several statements being aware of her privilege but that doesn't make it any more relatable.

Secondly, the amount of quack and snake oil treatments she gets done and is a proponent of. Colonics? Cryotherapy? "Total cleanses" which are just...fasting? One "treatment" which *induced a fever* and she said it would "burn out all the bad bugs" but there were no doctors to be found, it was a "holistic" treatment. Hmm. Also later on she shows off her "rope worms" which came out of her...but rope worms...aren't real. They're not actual, real parasites. They're bits of intestinal lining that come out after things like bleach enemas. This is horribly dangerous. She speaks of these "rope worms" as though they were eating away at her immune system but...they don't exist.

I understand trying to find treatment, but the amount of frightening quackery she accepts during the search is unreal. Much of it likely made her sicker.
(Inducing a fever! With no doctors present!)

I appreciate her...talking about her chronic illness. But. I have trouble getting past the snake oil and the unlimited money.

[Megan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well, hmmmm. Don't want to criticize too much, as this is someone's personal journey, but it was very hard to grasp all the outlandish, bizarre treatments all administered, helter skelter and mixed together, to ever grasp what was helping or not helping! As someone who suffers from diagnosed then rediagnosed and now undiagnosed autoimmune issues, I understand the frustration of living with chronic pain and brain fog. My brother suggested the book thinking I might find some help. Her story of being unheard and brushed under the rug by the medical community is very real and relevant. But her description of tons of treatments all at once, daily colonics and enimas and injections for years, along with treatments in back allies of Tijuana, etc seems extreme to me and make me think her choices might be part of her problem.

[Shelly Hendrick · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is well written and has good flow. I was fascinated by her relationship with David Foster. who appears just as he did in Linda Thompson's book (cold, self serving). I believe Yolanda has Lyme, but her ridiculous extremes on "cures" probably made her far more sick. What seemed to really "cure" her was removal of silicone from breast implants gone wrong. She seems relentless and obsessed; instead of letting one thing work, she begins another, and another and another. I'm glad she is healthier now, but she strikes me as a person with a pattern of illness.

[Onceinabluemoon · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 this is very difficult to rate, I don't like to judge anyone's memoirs , but I found this book overwhelming… I grew up Christian scientist, drs were not in my world, reading this goes against every fiber within me, it felt like charms, to snake oil, to voodoo, anything goes, endlessly... I get why he said the sick card was up, just hearing her endless pursuits was extremely uncomfortable to read, much less live with. With countless attempts at anything and everything how do you know what works and what's harming you even more with back to back treatments. I could never take hundreds of pills per day, constant colinics, sift through my stool, it's just not in me, or my way of thought, so the book was hard to swallow. she is an extremely beautiful woman, but I found zero connection and plenty of contradictions in her choices. I am sorry for her health woes, I hope she finds a path to wellness, reading this left me very uncomfortable but I had no desire to abandon the book.

[Justin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good insight into her uncovering and discovering her illness and associated issues from Lyme disease. Brings life to the hell that people with a chronic health illness have in a lack of understanding from both the medical professionals and friends/family.

Note: this is not a tell all about RHOBH in any way.

[Marsha Hood · Rating 5 out of 5]

Whether you are a Housewives fan or just want to read about an amazing woman this is a must Read. From farm girl to super model and mother of the two top models in the world right now, to Lyme disease warrior Yolanda Foster’s journey is incredible to say the least. If you are a David Foster fan this might change your mind. Of course I was riveted to every word. PLEASE read or listen to this book!!!

[Ellison · Rating 3 out of 5]

a model has her body break down and she is unable to function. as a member of a 'reality' tv show she is wealthy and able to travel the globe in search of potential diagnosis and possible treatments, all of them. with her fame she aspires to share the difficulties of the ailment as it under radar and misunderstood? color pix.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone with chronic neurological Lyme I related very strongly to Yolanda's experience. She was spot on in explaining the symptoms and what it feels like to look fine on the outside but be in horrible pain on the inside. This is a super honest and brutal memoir of a life altered by Lyme and I can't express how thankful I am to Yolanda for sharing this with the world. Through my illness I feel like I've had to become a bit of an expert in Lyme but I learned a few new things. Seeing all the unusual treatments she has tried and that didn't work will save a lot of Lymies from wasting time and money. Yolanda has done such a great job at bringing awareness to this horrible disease. It would be fabulous if everyone could read this book to get a better understanding of this rapidly spreading infection and to have compassion for those who suffer from it.

I listened to the audio version and although Yolanda only narrates small parts of the book and the rest is done by another narrator, the audio sounds like a conversation with a friend and I really feel like I got to know Yolanda through her words. Many Lymies lose the ability to read so audiobooks are a great option. It's actually why I started listening to audio several years ago and even though I have relearned how to read I still enjoy listening sometimes.

[Denice Hogan · Rating 1 out of 5]

Probably one of the worst books I have ever read. It was horrible. She just kept going over and over the same thing. She has Lyme Disease. She cannot move and tries EVERY holistic method. Never helps. Does not try conventional medicine except 1 round of anti biotic. One minute she cannot get out of bed for weeks at a time but then she runs to NY or Europe to see her kids. And then cannot get out of bed for weeks?????? Finally, lets her husband take over and going to a regular doctor finds her breast implants were leaking and suddenly after having them removed, she is better.
No wonder he divorced her but she doesn't get it.
I would never recommend this book to anyone. A true waste of time

[Melinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone battling Lyme for many years, Yolanda's story was like reading my own (minus the fame and wealth LOL). The struggles Lyme patients face on a daily basis are many, and we need more awareness to bring this invisible disease to light for all Lyme patients and their families who are at risk. Thanks to Yolanda for sharing her honest, raw, emotional, and encouraging story.

[Free Thinking Mom · Rating 4 out of 5]

Extremely honest (and sometimes shocking) book about a truly debilitating disease. Thank you Yolanda for bringing this to the forefront. So much more support and research needed for these invisible diseases.

[izzy_my · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this memoir, Yolanda Hadid narrates her years of struggle fighting chronic Lyme disease, and makes a point to detail all the different doctors she goes through and which of the protocols she follows are beneficial for her Lyme symptoms. Her emotional ups and downs are also captured, which I found very relatable.

I think this book is a great source of information, mainly support for Lyme sufferers as myself, since as Yolanda explains on the book through her experiences, this is a very unknown illness, not only to the general public but also to the medical circles. I didn't know about Yolanda Hadid until this book, but I appreciate she is making an effort to visibilize Lyme disease, an illness hard to diagnose and treat. The book, though, may not be for all, and unless I would not empathise so closely with her experience, maybe it would have been ardous to go through these 300 pages.

[Leslie Sachlis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have often wondered what I might have done differently if I had had more resources to fight my own battle with tick borne disease. "Believe Me" is a candid account of someone who was able to travel many roads in an effort to get well. I read the book to see if she had learned something that I had never heard or read of. This book is important because it bears witness to what tick born illnesses can do to your life and to those around you. Hopefully this book will help raise awareness of the dangers of tick born illnesses - and encourage people to be safe and perhaps contribute to research for cures to the different illnesses transmitted by ticks and other parasites that eat blood meals.

[Megan · Rating 3 out of 5]

The phenomenon known as chronic Lyme disease is controversial, to say the least. I’ve done a bit of research recently due to personal reasons (a fear that a childhood infection, where Lyme spent months in my body before we recognized it, could still somehow be playing a part in my current health decline). And I'm not interested in debating whether or not chronic Lyme is "real." I don’t know the answer. But what I do know is this: there are obviously diseases, infections, and illnesses out there that are very much real and have a profound effect on people's abilities to live their lives the way they wish they could.

This book is eye-opening in many ways. To see how, despite all the advances we've made, the broad world of medicine and healing can still fail some so thoroughly. Yolanda is clearly aware how privileged she is, that she can travel the globe in search of something—anything—to make her feel like more than a captive in her own skin. But the scariest thing? How many of them didn't work for her. Despite the resources she has access to, the blatant risks she is willing to take at certain points in her journey... she never finds a cure. She does find a way to get enough energy back to be more involved in her children's active lives, which is clearly the most important thing to her. I salute her for that. The discouraging thing is how many hoops she had to jump through to get there—and how inaccessible that somewhat-successful regimen is to the normal person.

Notably, through Yolanda’s journey, we see quite an ugly side to humanity. How many people think she is "making it up," though many of her symptoms clearly exist. Just because someone can put on a brave face for a few minutes doesn't mean that smile is an accurate picture of their life. So many people talked about Yolanda behind her back, were quick to abandon her, and accuse her of using her illness as a way to get out of commitments.

The fact that even medical professionals were so quick to dismiss so many of her concerns is disturbing. I understand not knowing the answers, but telling someone "if it's parasites" when she's been eliminating them at an alarming rate, and even saved samples for you to test? Just one of several examples reflecting a startling lack of compassion I'm afraid is all too common. I feel for people all over the world that are dismissed so easily, that can't find the answers they need because they don't have the resources to look, or—as in Yolanda's case—because they don't yet seem to exist.

The part of this book that resonated the most with me is how frustrating and difficult it is to have an invisible illness. How many people are willing to just say "you look fine" and shrug off someone's suffering like it doesn't exist, just because it isn't playing out in a visible way. How terrifying and frustrating it is to feel your body failing on you, without knowing why. Knowing you are young, and (at least seem to be) relatively healthy, and that your body shouldn't be doing this to you.

After only weeks of feeling my fatigue grow to the point where I spend nearly all of my non-working hours in bed, not having the energy to perform simple tasks like doing laundry or crossing the store to do my grocery shopping without psyching myself up and knowing it will sap every last bit of energy I have left right out of me... and the terrifying sensation of developing pain all over, having migraines almost every day, of feeling your muscles feel like they're going to shake themselves right out from under you at any moment... It's a horrible experience. You feel terrified. Helpless. I can't imagine suffering through it for years, and hope with every ounce of my being that I don't have to.

Perhaps the worst part is not knowing what's wrong and how to fix it, or if it even can be. But people acting like you have to be fine because you look fine ... how old are you anyway - just wait until you're in your sixties and then you’ll have a right to complain ... what are you not allowed out of the pharmacy to show me where the Flonase is?

I am, thank you very much. I'm just hurting all over, and the few steps I took to the door to answer your question about what to get your husband have my muscles tremoring like a nervous chihuahua on speed.

I'm not being difficult in that moment I hesitate between you asking me to show you where the product is and opening the door, I'm calculating the distance separating us and the first aisle, how much of my limited supply of energy it will take out of me to go there before I can get that short reprieve to rest and sit at lunch, and how much worse it will be if other customers catch me outside and ask me to show them things several aisles away. As you continue to needle me as I'm explaining how your husband needs to use this medicine to feel better, snidely commenting that you're so sorry you made me come outside, and really, are you not allowed to come out here, I am praying. For patience and strength for myself. For you to grow a little more understanding and to treat strangers with kindness.

And most of all, that people should never have to feel this way—helpless, judged, sick down to the depths of their bones seemingly without a cause and facing a potentially daunting journey to seek answers that may never come. I only hope that someday that can be true.