Personal Development for Smart People: The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth

by Steve Pavlina

Despite promises of “fast and easy” results from slick marketers, real personal growth is neither fast nor easy. The truth is that hard work, courage, and self-discipline are required to achieve meaningful results—results that are not attained by those who cling to the fantasy of achievement without effort. Personal Development for Smart People reveals the unvarnished truth about what it takes to consciously grow as a human being. As you read, you’ll learn the seven universal principles behind all successful growth efforts ( truth, love, power, oneness, authority, courage, and intelligence ); as well as practical, insightful methods for improving your health, relationships, career, finances, and more. You’ll see how to become the conscious creator of your life instead of feeling hopelessly adrift, enjoy a fulfilling career that honors your unique self-expression, attract empowering relationships with loving, compatible partners, wake up early feeling motivated, energized, and enthusiastic , achieve inspiring goals with disciplined daily habits and much more! With its refreshingly honest yet highly motivating style, this fascinating book will help you courageously explore, creatively express, and consciously embrace your extraordinary human journey.

Genres: Personal Development, Self Help, Nonfiction, Business, Psychology, Productivity, Personal Growth

288 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2008

About the author

Self-help author, motivational speaker and entrepreneur. He is the author of the web site and blog dedicated to personal development, StevePavlina.com and the book Personal Development for Smart People. He writes on a broad range of topics, and his lifestyle experiments (e.g. polyphasic sleep) have generated some mainstream media interest.

Reviews

[kareem · Rating 5 out of 5]

Personal Development for smart people

TRUTH
7: In order to grow, you must repeatedly tackle fresh challenges and consider new ideas to give your mind resh input. If you merely repeat the same experiences, you'll stagnate, and your mental capacity will atrophy.

7: Excessive routine is the enemy of intelligence.

7: Think about where your life is headed and and yourself "how do i honestly expect my life to turn out?" imagine a logical impartial observer is assigned examine your life in detail and to predict what your life will look like in 20 years, based on your current behavior patterns. If you're brave enough, ask several people who know you well to give you an honest assessment of where they see you in two decades. their answers may surprise you.

13: the best point to make new choices is when you feel alert, clearheaded, and intelligent. put those decisions in writing and fully commit yourself to them. when you inevitably sink back down to lower states and lose sight of that higher perspective, continue to act on those decisions even though you may no longer feel as committed to them. if your decisions are not perfect, when you use this process, you can at least trust that you made them correctly and from a place of truth.

16: When you sense a conflict between feelings, beliefs, and behavior ask yourself if you really believe what you've been taught. are your beliefs truthful and accurate? are they congruent with your perceptions? in order to align yourself with truth, you must eventually release erroneous, inaccurate, and inconsistent beliefs. cultivating self-trust frees you; self-doubt enslaves you.

22: Look at each area of your life and ask yourself, What do I truly want? What is my dream, my grand vision? What is the deep desire Ive been longing for, the one i hesitate to admit because i don't think i can have it? what path do i most want to experience? accept that you want what you want, and stop living in denial of your true desires.

LOVE
27: the decision to connect is the essence of love.

28: if you want to grow consciously, you must deliberately decide which connections you'll strengthen and which you'll allow to weaken.

29: as adults we often forget that the best way to fulfill our desires is to walk right up to whatever interests us and engage with it directly. instead, we create all kinds of silly rules that limit our ability to connect with what we want. by consciously making connections that feel intuitively correct to you, you bring yourself into alignment with the principle of love.

31: when you understand there's no such thing as an external relationship, you'll become aware that the true purpose of relationships is self-exploration. when you feel a deep sense of communion with another person, you're actually connecting deeply with an important part of yourself. by communing with others, you learn to love yourself more fully.

35: next time you're with a group of people, imagine that each person there is inherently connected to you, and notice what happens.

40: Love is not an accident. love is a choice to recognize the deep nonphysical connection we all share. to love is to say "we are all the same."

44: think of your relationships as external projections of the real you, and you'll realize that the purpose of every relationship is to teach you how to love yourself from the inside out. WHenever you communicate with another person, you're exploring the depths of your own consciousness because that's where all your relationships exist.

POWER
50: What do you long for so badly that you can't stop thinking about it, even if you consider it impossible. If you want to develop your power, you must accept your desires as they come, no matter how strange they may seem.

51: Your choices are yours to make and can never be dictated by others. you need never justify what you want. you want what you want, and that is enough. in order to wield power effectively, you must accept full responsibility for your life and be willing to make decisions under all circumstances. this includes ambiguous, challenging, and risky situations. there's no rule that says you have to be right. the only rule is that no matter what happens, you're responsible.

51:when you face important crossrowads in life, exercise your power to decide consciously. offer up a definitive yes or no. don't succumb to the blind defeat of silent approval. to align yourself with power, you must make real choices.

51: life is constantly asking "what do you want?" you have the freedom to answer that question however you wish.

52: is makes sense to focus your attention on the current moment since it's the only place you have any real power (past is over and you have no control over the future)

53: the purpose of goal setting is not to control future, but to improve quality of present-moment reality - give you better clarity and focus. set goals that make you feel powerul, motivated, and driven when you focus on them, long before the final outcome is actally achieved. avoid setting goals that make you feel powerless, stressed, or weak.

56: your goals don't need to be specific, clear, and measurable. oyu don't need crisp deadlines and you don't need detailed step by step plans. you simply need a burning desire to take action. only goals that align with your truest, deepest desires can summon that kind of power. pick goals that are so exciting that making a serious effort feels almost effortless.

58: motivation is highest when you're already in motion. if you can summon enough discipline to get going again, you'll often find that your momentum reboots your natural motivation to continue.

59: no problems are big or small except relative to your self-discipline. the more disciplined you are, the lighter your problems are. building self-discipline is one of the hardest things you'll ever have to do.

64: if you adopt a highly disciplined routine for your first waking hour, you'll probably enjoy a highly productive day.

ONENESS
70: love is choosing to connect. oneness is knowing your already connected. found the easiest way to tune in to oneness is ask "where is the joy"

73: genuine honesty is truth tempered with love

86: there's no higher authority in life than you. if you think anyone else has authority over you, it's only because you yield your authority by choice. sometimes the consequences are so severe that you feel as if you have no choice, but in truth you always do.

87: if you fail to claim authority over your own life, someone else will surely claim it for you.

COURAGE
102: enables us to face long-term gain in the face of short-term obstacles. without sufficient courage, your default behavior will be to play it safe by favoring false security over purposeful action.

102: a good rule of thumb to follow is: whatever you fear, you must eventually face

102: before you embark on any path, ask the question: does this path have a heart? If the answer is no, you will know it, and then you must choose another path. If your path has no heart, you're on the wrong path. the heart-centered path is that of courage, not false security. the illusion of security is the primary aim of the false path.

104: go out and actively create what you want. life is waiting for you to make the first move. use your power. fear is the shroud of opportunity. your greatest regrets in life won't be the mistakes you made; they'll be the opportunities you let slip through your fingers by failing to act. when you take the initiative, you pull back the shroud of fear and catch a glimpse of the opportunity behind it.

105: if you want something, ask for it. accept the risk of rejection and summon the courage to take action anyway. if you get turned down, you'll survive. you'll learn from the experience and grow stronger. if you don't get rejected, you'll achieve your outcome in the fastest and simplest way possible. when you risk rejection, either you get what you want or you build some courage. either way the outcome is positive.

107: the guiding force of honor is your conscience, which is your intuitive ability to discern right from wrong. right actions are aligned with truth, love, and power. wrong actions are out of alignment with these principles. a sense of honor enables you to perceive the difference.

108: when you feel lazy and unmotivated, the simple reason is that you're feeling disconnected. you've fallen out of alignment with truth, love, and power. when you recognize that you're in this state, reconnect with the real you. remember who you are. reconnect with what excites you. revisit those times in life when you were on fire - not because of external events, but because you were aligned with your truth, love, and power. turn your gaze within and ask yourself: where is the path with a heart, and what can i do to honor that path right now? whatever the answer, summon the courage to take immediate action.

119: when we creatively express ourselves, we're honestly sharing what's most important to us.

121: when you're in flow, you'll know without a doubt that you're on the right track as you make progress towards something meaningful and important. what inspires you isn't the achievement of any particular goal; it's the endless flow of self-expression. you'll fall in love with the journey itself.

CAREER
161: "work is love made visible."

170: what is the career path with a heart - the path that terrifies you, the path that stirs your soul, the path you secretly fantasize about that's the path that honors the real you.

for the rest of the notes go here (goodreads only allows 10k characters):
http://knotes.tumblr.com/post/7860843...

[Mark Dykeman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Background:
Steve Pavlina, a former computer gaming software entrepreneur, started blogging about personal growth in 2004. He has pursued personal growth and self-improvement voraciously since avoiding a jail sentence for theft at the age of 19. Since then, he has undertaken many personal growth experiments, read and studied a great deal of material, and has worked to share that information with other people. He turned his life around and has done some cool, worthwhile things since then. In short, through his blog, forums, articles, podcasts, and other content, Steve Pavlina tries to help people change the way they think, act, and even feel about things in order to help them grow.

Personal Development for Smart People is Steve’s first book and it is aligned with his other content, supplementing and reinforcing it in many ways. The subtitle of his book, The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth, repeats his main theme of living consciously: thinking, planning, doing, evaluating and repeating this cycle in order to grow as a person.

The strengths:
Steve’s book is logically divided into two sections: background theory and practical applications for personal growth. He has devised a logical framework for his principles of personal development, starting with some core ideas and then combining them several ways to come up with seven principles. The seventh principle, intelligence, combines the three basic principles in a holistic way to show that intelligence, or smarts, depends on truth, power, and love. I like this idea of humanizing intelligence.

The book has a useful self-assessment test (with a twist!) to help you determine where you are at in your own personal development. It contains a number of self-improvement exercises, including a number of habits that you work on and also ways to develop these habits. He favors 30 day trials or programs to develop new habits, similar to how Leo Babauta and Scott H. Young describe methods to build habit builds.

Steve’s writing style is light and friendly, making his book an easy read. He leads you through the reasons to help improve yourself and also attempts to rebut some of the common arguments that attempt to counter his ideas. He does a good job at this, although some people will disagree with some of his logic. In particular, I think some people will reject some of his rationale behind his concepts of love and oneness, particularly if they aren’t spiritually inclined or sufficiently open-minded. The key to enjoying and using his work, in general, is to be prepared to set aside your ideas and beliefs where they don’t naturally align with Steve’s, then think them through and see if you can accept his arguments.

I like the fact that he doesn’t try to make things seem easy, although he does try to provide techniques and tips to help you out. He acknowledges that personal growth is hard and requires both motivation and self-discipline.

The anecdotes and quotations that he sprinkles through the book are good, too.

The areas for improvement:
There are three main problems with this book that bothered me:

No index to quickly find specific sections of the book: at 254 pages, it might not be necessary to have such an index, but it would be helpful to quickly find certain parts of the book.

No references: his book clearly echoes the work of hundreds of years of writing, philosophy, and thinking from a myriad number of sources. His concept of oneness, as an example, reflects a number of other religions and philosophies which talk about how all things and beings are interconnected, although his personal concept of spirituality seems to revolve around atheism (no, that’s not a contradiction). However, Steve doesn’t cite many external resources other than a few quotes. By contrast, Stephen Covey has made some attempts to highlight the specific resources that have influenced his ideas, particularly in First Things First. There’s no doubt that Steve did a lot of work to take those basic concepts and fine tune them to make his own methodology. I feel that citing more external sources would have provided more growth material for his readers.

Section 2, the practical applications of his book, was a little disappointing: his chapter topics make good frameworks for discussion (e.g. habits; career; money; relationships; health, etc.), but the bulk of the practical exercises are limited to the Habits chapter, as well as the Intelligence chapter of section one. They are all good exercises, but they’re all clumped together in those two chapters, which seems to dilute the overall value of section 2. Steve links all seven principles of personal development to each practical application chapter, but it appears to be done more to reinforce that intellectual framework than to give you concrete, practical exercises for each application. However, he does add a number of personal anecdotes throughout which help to stimulate some thoughts.

Other points of interest:
Steve provides links to parts of his website to provide some additional information for his reader.

Verdict (out of 10): 8 (worth buying and reading)

Pavlina provides enough interesting content, anecdotes, and exercises to make this an enjoyable but not heavy read. It’s worth reading if you’re looking for a good framework to organize your personal growth activities and it’s full of good ideas. It’s not a workbook. It probably works even better when you head over to his website and add in the blog, forums, etc., but it certainly stands on its own.

[Chris · Rating 2 out of 5]

Found this book to be of little or no use. The concepts put forth in this book basically try to break down all personal development into the primary building blocks (truth, love, power). From this, a number of secondary elements are defined as the intersection between the primary elements. Overall, the book seemed to mostly be an attempt to justify the authors' definition of these building blocks, with little in the way of practical advice or direction.

The one section I did enjoy was the splitting of methods for generating income into the value creation type, and the mooching type. I like the idea, and think it is a solid way to summarize a concept I had been playing around with.

Perhaps this book would be more valuable to someone a bit further along a personal development or growth path, but for my purposes it fell short.

[Nicholas · Rating 4 out of 5]

This guy built self-improvement.


Quotes:

"Whatever you fear, you must eventually face."

"Openly admit to yourself that even though you're stuck with complete responsibility for every area of your life, you may not have the ability to fix what isn't working at this point. Simply accept that this is how things are for now, but don't deny the truth of the situation. Never pretend to enjoy a job you hate. Never pretend to be happy in an unfulfilling relationship. Never pretend that your finances are strong when they're really weak. If you want your situation to improve, you must first come clean with yourself and admit the whole truth."

"Put your greatest trust in your own judgment, even when others disagree with you. Cultivating self trust frees you; self-doubt enslaves you."

"Instead of your true purpose, you pursue money, recognition, or comfort. Instead of genuine growth, you settle for climbing the corporate ladder. Instead of abiding friendship and human intimacy, you settle for a sea of casual contacts, none of whom know, accept, and love the real you. Instead of worthwhile challenges, you settle for the illusion of security."

"You're a worthy human being. When you hold back from connecting due to fear of rejection, you rob other people of the chance to get to know you. Many people would love to get to know you. Many people would love the chance to connect with you. They want someone to understand them, someone who can remind them that they aren't alone."

"Powerlessness is neither noble nor intelligent. It's a misguided path rooted in fear, denial, and low self-worth. If you desire to live more consciously, you must learn to wield and apply power wisely, not to flee from the responsibility it entails."

"It's entirely pointless to blame God, your parents, the government, or anyone else for your lot in life. Blame can only make you powerless. It doesn't matter who contributed to your current situation - all that matters is that you must live with it. No amount of blame can make that burden any easier."

"You never need to justify what you want."

"Life is constantly asking: What do you want? You have the freedom to answer that question however you wish."

"Many people set goals and then assume the path to reach them will require suffering and sacrifice. This is a recipe for failure. Whenever you consider a new goal, pay attention to the effect it has on your present reality. Set goals that make you feel powerful, motivated, and driven when you focus on them, long before the final outcome is actually achieved...Instead of going after goals that you think will make you happy in the distant future, focus on goals that make you happy right now."

"It isn't enough to just get by in life. If you perform well below your capacity, you're denying responsibility for your role in the larger body. You're withholding value both from yourself and others."

"People who didn't know me were shocked by how quickly I succeeded. What they didn't realize was that this was only possible because of the massive failures I worked through in my previous company."

"Make a habit of intentionally reaching out and connecting with others. Break the limiting pattern of trying to do everything solo."

"You're always free to make different choices from this point onward, but in order to do so, you must unconditionally accept where you are."

"If it takes years to reach your goal, then so be it. The time is going to pass anyway, so you might as well put it to good use. Years from now you'll either be where you want to be...or you won't."

"The same people who hated you for leaving will turn around and ask your advice on how they can do what you did. The reason people get angry in such situations is that you force them to face the unpleasant truths they've been avoiding as well."

[Manuel Jose · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are a ton of actionable self development ideas and techniques to be more productive that are detailed in this book, including things like single tasking, time management techniques, timeboxing, and daily journaling. He also has really radical ideas that are fun to think about, like how you should never have a job, why you should eat raw vegan, and why he chooses to live a polyamorous lifestyle. The action steps for self improvement are good, and I like that he gets the reader to question doing things the “normal” way. What I dislike is the new age woo woo law of attraction hippie spirituality stuff. Still, there are plenty of cool ideas in here.

[Elias · Rating 1 out of 5]

Self-indulgent nonsense. Do not read this book if it was the last book on Earth.

[Greg Webb · Rating 2 out of 5]

I stumbled upon Steve's blog last year and found several of this posts insightful, useful, and fun. So I found his book at the library and after reading it, I'm glad I didn't pay for it.

This was a total switch, because where I found the blog posts to be enjoyable, here it seems he was trying to impress everyone with his intellect. I got the impression that because he was now a well-known, published, household name that he was forcing himself to try and cram as many 'big words' into a sentence as possible. Like that would be more convincing.

Maybe I'm just not part of the "Smart People" demographic he was targeting, but I found it to be a turn-off.

[uosɯɐS · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not a bad book, but I like many of his essays/blog posts better (http://www.stevepavlina.com/articles/...). I don't really agree with some of the stuff that Steve has gotten into lately, but at least he is upfront about it. I think many of his blogposts are extremely helpful.

[Alina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some parts were good but overall didn’t really speak to me

[Adam Ashton · Rating 2 out of 5]

Disappointed with this one. Was on the shelf a long time and I looked forward to one day getting to it. I like the idea of how the principles work together, then the application of each, but this just didn’t do it for me. Skimmed through the second half and ended up skipping a lot

[Barack Liu · Rating 5 out of 5]

556-The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth-Steve Pavlina-Psychology-2008

Barack
2024/02/10

The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth, first published in 2008. It reveals the truth about what it takes to consciously grow as a person. As you read, you'll learn the seven universal principles behind all successful growth efforts (truth, love, power, unity, authority, courage, and wisdom); as well as practical, insightful methods for improving your health, relationships, career, finances, and more. You'll learn how to become a conscious life creator instead of feeling hopelessly adrift, enjoy a fulfilling career that honors your unique self-expression, build an empowering relationship with a loving, inclusive partner, wake up feeling motivated, energized, and enthusiastic, achieve inspiring goals through disciplined daily habits, and more.

Steve Pavlina was born in Santa Monica, California, US in 1971. He is an American self-help guru, motivational speaker and entrepreneur. He is the author of the website stevepavlina.com and the book Personal Development for Smart People.

On January 27, 1991, Pavlina was arrested for theft in Sacramento, California, and sentenced to 60 hours of community service. He claimed that this was the motivation he needed to turn his life around, and he also claimed that he was sentenced to a harsher sentence due to errors in the legal process.

Prior to starting his own development site, Pavlina founded Dexterity Software, an independent computer game developer and publisher. In a blog post, he describes how he transitioned from being a game publisher, forum participant, etc. to being a public speaker and self-help blogger by removing shortcuts from his desktop and bookmarks, and reducing anything gamer-related, such as contacts, obligations, emails, and relationships, in order to be surrounded by an environment that fully reinforced his new identity.

Steve Pavlina served as Vice President of the Association of Software Professionals (ASP) in 1999 and President of ASP in 2000. By this time, Steve's writings had already made an impact in the software development community. The ASP Hall of Fame page describes him as having "had a significant and lasting impact on others through his articles and posts."

In 2004, Steve Pavlina founded a website and blog dedicated to personal development, StevePavlina.com ("Personal Development for Smart People"). Dexterity Software was dormant at the time. On October 31, 2006, Steve closed Dexterity Software in order (he said) to focus full time on the website and blog.

On October 15, 2008, Hay House published Pavlina's book, Personal Development for Intelligent People, which expands on several of the topics raised in his blog.

Table of Content
Part 1: Fundamental Principles
Chapter 1: Truth
Chapter 2: Love
Chapter 3: Power
Part 2: Practical Application
Chapter 8: Habits
Chapter 9: Career
Chapter 10: Money

The author candidly shared an ignominious experience in his youth - he was arrested for theft during college and spent 60 days in jail. He did not try to cover up this experience, but chose to mention it bluntly at the beginning of his autobiography. When we face the stains of our past, we often instinctively want to conceal them, fearing that it will affect others' evaluation of us. However, as time goes by, when we have achieved certain achievements, the setbacks we once experienced may become an experience worth telling, even with a bit of pride and pride. People use the "present" to reinterpret the "past". Takashima Tonsho spent 7 years in prison, and some entrepreneurs or politicians have also been imprisoned for various reasons. However, what is truly admirable is not the darkest moment of their lives, but that they can still pick themselves up and reshape their lives after experiencing major setbacks. Looking back on myself, when I just graduated from high school, if someone asked me if I had any regrets, I would answer "no" without hesitation. But now looking back, it was not because I had such a good judgment, but because I had too little experience at the time and hardly made many truly important decisions independently. Therefore, rather than saying that I made the right choice, it is better to say that I simply did not experience enough choices. I am a person who is used to rational analysis and pursuing the best solution. This way of thinking also brings a potential risk: after making a decision, I may review it repeatedly, and even when I discover a new factor afterwards , I begin to doubt whether the original decision was correct and thus feel regret. This excessive reflection and self-blame often become a stumbling block on the road to progress.

Among the three principles of personal growth proposed by the author, the first one mentioned is Truth. What is "truth"? Truth means to admit reality. The Analects of Confucius said: "To know what you know and to know what you don't know is knowledge." Accepting reality means that we can face the facts that we don't want to face and admit our shortcomings. For example, we may not be smart enough, rich enough, or handsome enough, or we may be hesitant when making decisions, or even clumsy when taking pictures, and our thinking is always half a beat slower when learning. Accepting reality does not mean giving up efforts, but it means that we dare to face these defects and use them as a starting point to change. It seems easy to talk about "accepting reality" while sitting in a warm and comfortable environment, but can we really do it in real life? When others make suggestions, even if they only indirectly point out our shortcomings, we will instinctively feel resistance and even subconsciously defend ourselves. Why can't we face the real us calmly? If we can't even face ourselves, how can we change? The reason why the truth is hard to accept is that it is too naked and makes people feel that there is nothing to hide. But if we can't even admit it, how can we take the first step to change? Real growth begins with facing the truth.

The second of the three principles is love. I agree with this. However, for a long time in the past, I never put "love" in a high priority position. Perhaps because it is difficult to quantify, I selectively ignore it. However, starting from 2022, because of major changes in my living environment, my thinking about "love" has gradually deepened, and I have also raised its priority in my mind, realizing its profound impact on personal growth. The author proposed three key elements of "love" in the book: Connection , Communication, and Communion. Connection-How do we choose who to connect with? How do we choose to alienate certain people? Every time we decide to interact with someone, it means investing time and energy, and when we decide not to interact with someone, even if the other party takes the initiative to approach, we will choose to avoid it. This choice determines the construction of our interpersonal relationships and life circles. Communication-Love is not only about expressing yourself, but more importantly, listening to each other. True love means being willing to patiently understand each other and care about their needs and ideas. Knowing what the other person wants and doesn't want, and establishing a deep understanding in the communication, this is the real communication. Communion (resonance) - this word is somewhat similar to Connection (connection) to me, but I understand that the author means that it emphasizes more on a kind of interaction and emotional exchange. If Connection is the connection between people, then Communion is more like a deep interaction between people. The flow of emotions is two-way, and only in the process of mutual response can real emotions be formed and deepened. In the past, my understanding of "love" may be too superficial, but as time goes by, I began to realize that it is not just a perceptual concept, but also a kind of ability that needs to be actively cultivated and practiced. Love is not a one-way giving, but a real bond formed in constant connection, communication and resonance.

The third of the three principles mentioned in the book is "Power", which refers to the ability to change oneself and the surrounding environment. It can be understood as the ability to radiate influence outward with oneself as the center of the circle, and then shape the external environment. In this section, the author proposed 6 elements related to "power": Responsibility, responsibility means being responsible for what you promised and completing it from beginning to end. For example, when someone entrusts me with a task, if I can follow up and implement it throughout the process, this is a sense of responsibility; on the contrary, if I just verbally agree and it ends up being nothing, then I lack a sense of responsibility. Real power comes first from taking responsibility for one's own responsibilities. Desire , whether you have a strong desire, is the core driving force for personal growth. If a person lacks a real desire for something, it is difficult to devote enough energy to achieve it. Self-Determination, self-drive and desire are closely linked. Only when we have a strong enough desire in our hearts can we form a firm determination. If a person's determination is not firm enough, it often means that his desire is not strong enough. True self-motivation comes from deep inner motivation, not external push. Focus: People’s time, energy, and material resources are limited, so we must make choices. What we focus on determines the direction of our growth. For example, if I choose to attend a celebrity interview on a certain night, then I cannot attend a meditation group at the same time. This decision reflects where my focus is. Making trade-offs between many possibilities is the embodiment of focus. Effort: No matter what the goal is, it takes effort to achieve it. Even seemingly simple tasks cannot be separated from action. Desire and determination alone, without actual action, are all just empty talk. Self-Discipline: Self-discipline is the ability to persist for a long time, and truly lasting self-discipline is often based on inner love. If we have no interest in something and only rely on willpower to force ourselves to do it, it will be difficult to persist. Therefore, the key to cultivating self-discipline is to find something that we really like and are willing to invest in for a long time.

Based on the three principles proposed by the author, Truth, Love and Power, he derived three secondary principles by combining them in pairs: Oneness, Authority and Courage. 1Truth and Love combine to form Oneness . I understand "unity" to be similar to what Zhuangzi said in "On the Equality of Things": "Heaven and earth are born with me, and all things are one with me." In many religions, the ultimate feeling is often "no self", that is, there is no distinction between "you and me", and everything is a different part of the same whole. This is like a program running in a multi-threaded way. Although each thread has a different direction, their essence is the same. Each of us is actually like these threads, a part of the whole. Truth and Power combine to form Authority. Authority is not just an external influence, but also an internal persuasiveness based on truth and power. With love and truth as the foundation, plus the support of power, such authority can truly have a far-reaching impact. Love and Power combine to form Courage. Love makes us willing to connect and try, while power is the internal driving force that supports action. Courage comes from the combination of love and power: with love, we have the motivation to act; with power, we have the ability to realize these actions. Many times, we will lament that we have "willingness but powerlessness", that is, we want to do something but cannot do it due to lack of ability. This is actually a manifestation of lack of power. Truth, Love and Power combine to form Intelligence. When truth, love and power are all combined, a higher level of wisdom will be formed - this is not only wisdom, but also a unique ability of human beings. When we talk about artificial intelligence (AI) today, we often mention that AI can reach or even surpass the level of humans in some areas. However, when comparing human intelligence with machine intelligence, we first need to clearly define what "intelligence" is. Only by clarifying the definition of "intelligence" can we truly evaluate the difference between humans and AI. For this reason, I specifically consulted ChatGPT about its views on humans and AI. It mentioned many points, such as human creativity, subjective experience and value judgment, which are difficult for AI to replace. Through my understanding of these principles, I have come to realize the multidimensionality of wisdom. It is not just rational logic, but also a profound insight that can integrate truth, love and power. This kind of wisdom may be the biggest difference between humans and AI.

[Chris · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book for narcissists? :)

It was refreshing to read a self-development book with a unique framework of ideas instead of a derivative list of techniques.

Truth. Power. Love. If all your actions are in alignment with these three things then you are being Intelligent. And intelligence is the over-arching goal of everything. (Brings to mind one of my favourite maxims: Given enough time Hydrogen starts to look back and wonder where it came from.)

After explaining the core principles (and the subsequent secondary principles that derive from Truth, Power and Love), Steve then applies them to the different parts of life: Career, Money, Relationships etc

I'm a fan of Steve Pavlina and this somewhat feels like his thesis on the subject of growth. If you're new to Pavlina's work I would recommend "Waking Up: Becoming a Conscious Human" as a first touchstone to work out whether you like his style.

[Barryhobbs · Rating 3 out of 5]

I forget WHY I picked this specific book up. Something must have caught my attention on a blog somewhere about it. The first chapters where he is setting up the vocabulary that he will use later on are... thin and vapid. I found myself doing a whole lot of "yeah, I want you to talk about that", which is responded to with "we'll talk about that in a later chapter."

Once you DO get to the later chapters, he brings up a few good ideas, and a lot of exercises and things to think about. The money and career sections were the most interesting to me, since he sort of came at it from a very "I used to be a developer" sort of mindset, which I can relate to more than the hippy-dippy higher-self-consciousness bull that most self-help kind of people seem to get all dribbly over.

Last I checked, it wasn't available at the library. It's an interesting read, but not a must read for sure.

[Alex · Rating 5 out of 5]

Steve is a controversial person. I used to worship him, I used to question his choices in life... but all in all he is a very bright star in the personal development area and this book is one of the few ones that instead of just describing author's approach to personal development, actually tries to establish certain foundation that then can be applied to many other higher-level techniques including GTD, Covey's principles etc

[TarasProkopyuk · Rating 4 out of 5]

Хотя ожидания не совсем оправдались для данной книги, но тем не менее должен признать, что книга заслуживает множество хороших слов о ней.

Она исключает ошибки большинства книг этого жанра. То есть, кроме того как развить личную эффективность автор дополнительно делает акценты также и на развитие себя в моральном и духовном плане, на своё здоровье и физическую подготовку человека.

Книга весьма многогранная, очень светлая и, уверен, для многих будет очень полезная.

[Tim Nowotny · Rating 1 out of 5]

Very few tidbits with an obviously personal coloring by the author's opinion. The last bit may hold true for any book, but opinion is the magical word. It read for me as the things stoned college students write rambling down in long nights.
Maybe this could be good if you really take your time to reflect your thoughts against his chapters. But as this is solid advice for any book it is no jail free card.

[Cole Adams]

I liked this exercise:

Rate the different areas of your life each from 1 to 10:
- Happiness
- Body
- Career
- Business
- Personal Finance
- Social
- Romantic
- Family

Take every rating that isn't a 9 or 10 and replace it with a 1. A 7 is what you get when you allow too much falsehood and denial to creep into your life

[Zoe Zuniga · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sounded so reasonable in theory... until I listened to the author go off track using his own logic to justify doing whatever he felt like. looks good on paper but do not believe for a moment that the author practices what he preaches.

[Cristobal · Rating 1 out of 5]

I'd like my money back as well as the time I used for reading it. I wish I could remember how I learned about this book so that I could warn them about not coming close to it. The only good thing I can say about it is that thankfully I read it so you don't have to.

[Tom · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book of common sense. What is common sense in dealing with finances, relationships, religion, career, etc.
It was okay but was left a bit disappointed in some way. Can't really explain why.

[Lauren McGinney · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best personal development book I've ever read, and best self-improvement advice I've ever heard. Recommend to anyone and everyone!

[Alvin Soh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Seek truth with open eyes. Courageously accept your discoveries and their consequences. Rid your life of falsehood, denial and fear of what is. Make truth your ally, not your enemy. This isn’t easy, but it is correct.

Share your love openly. Connect with yourself and others by tuning in to the connection that already exists. The risk of rejection is overshadowed by the rewards of loving connections. Whenever you feel disconnected, reach out and connect with another human being. Remember that you’re always loved.

Fully develop your human abilities, and use your power in honourable service for the highest good of all. False power corrupts, but true power elevates. The more you resonate with truth and love, the greater your ability to wield power wisely. No one is served by your refusal to shine.

Embrace your unique path of growth. Use your intellect and emotions to guide you in the conscious pursuit of truth, love and power. Invest in creative self-expression, service, and contribution, and you can ill suffer no scarcity. Your greatest gift to the world is to share who you really are.

Enjoy your incredible human journey. Accept the highs and the lows as equally valuable. Recognise that your deepest sorrows reveal your greatest joys. Share your stories with others, and know that you’re not alone. Be grateful for your time on earth.

Live consciously.

Afterword of Steve Pavlina, author of Personal Development for Smart People

[Ali Safwan · Rating 2 out of 5]

I picked this book up because it yelled out ‘FOR SMART PEOPLE’, but of course my narcissism has led me to disappointment. This isn’t the worst self-help book in the world, but it’s not the best either… it exists in a purgatory of mediocrity. Here’s why:

🧘🏻‍♂️ Some ideas in the book seem profound and you think to yourself: ‘Wow. Why had I not thought of that before?’ And then it occurs to you, we’ve all had these profound thoughts before, it’s just that they’re too abstract to realistically follow. Abstractions like positive vibes only.  

🧘🏻‍♂️ If you’re in a tough spot in your life and going through a mid-life crisis of some sorts, this might be a good pick for you. But only if you are not making it your sole doctrine; nothing good ever came out of being obsessed with a book that professes to change your life. 

🧘🏻‍♂️ The first half of the book has some fun exercises you can do; they are good time-pass if nothing else. 

But as a whole, I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone who is a skeptic. If you already believe in the supernatural, then perhaps you’ll be susceptible to the ‘magic’ of this book. Nothing wrong with that.     

[Zarathustra Goertzel · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was symbolically chosen as my first 'book' of the year is in a sense Steve's Stature and Submersion courses.

It's quite cool to see the differences in this book from the Steve now. As if he's grown beyond focusing on these principles, in part as they're so woven into his being. The idea to deveolp principles that could cover growth even for AGIs in 10,000 years is commendable.

I think Oneness can derive Truth (tho I see how one can derive Oneness from Truth, too).

This is perhaps my favorite passage: "The purpose of goal setting isn’t to control the future. That would be senseless because the future only exists in your imagination. The point of goal setting is to improve the quality of your present-moment reality. Setting goals can give you greater clarity and focus right now. Whenever you set your sights on achieving something, always ask yourself, “How does setting this goal improve my present reality?” If it doesn’t improve your present reality, then the goal is pointless, and you may as well dump it. But if it brings greater clarity, focus, and motivation to your life when you think about it, it’s a keeper."

[Marushia Dark · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first came across Steve Pavlina through his blog and was motivated by his exceptional advice to buy "Personal Development for Smart People." It's a provocative title that really delivers as Steve gives you an actionable framework through which to view the world in what I call "Pavlina's Triangle."

Learn about the seven fundamental aspects of consciousness and how to apply them to your life to see greater success and happiness. The real beauty of his model is that we all struggle in at least one of these seven areas, but knowing what it is by name opens up other avenues to build upon that you might now have considered before. Case in point, if you're lacking in Power (one of the seven aspects), that can lead you towards something like Robert Greene's "48 Laws of Power." If you're lacking in Love, you can work to build better relationships. And so forth.

There are many garbage self-help books on the market, but you can rest assured this is one that will pay dividends. Whatever your problems in life, this can give you a leg up.

[Emr0c · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is very thoughtful and analytical. It is a universal guide to self improvement, living consciously and life itself.
I really liked the rational and analytical style and since it covers so many areas and ideas i found many inspiring passages.
What i did not like is that the entire book is narrated from the authors view but every idea is sold as a fact. All the little stories that are meant to underscore his points are derived from the authors life.
Furthermore he constantly advertises his own blog.
Anyways it was a good read containing a lot of interesting thoughts.

[Jennifer Kohel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Like most self-help books I have read this book is very repetitive. It provides you with a conceptual framework which is then analysed in regard to different elements that make up life (such as relationships, spirituality, money etc.).

Once the conceptual framework is understood it becomes a bit of a never ending loop - less a critic on the content itself but on the presentation. Nevertheless Steve Pavline offers some really good and handy practical advices to improve your own life and to ask the right questions. It's a decent read-in but could have been kept much more concise.

[sean · Rating 5 out of 5]

Despite the funny title, this is by far the best personal development book I have read. The author logically proposed a universal framework of personal development, based on several principles, including truth (admit the fact), love (connection) and power (ability to act and change the life). These principles are complimentary to each other and nonredundant. Also, the author delivers the information in a concise and clear way, which makes the book enjoyable to read when many authors nowadays tend to repeat the same contents over and over in writing.

[Nguyễn Thái Khâm · Rating 4 out of 5]

HOàn thành quyển sách đầu tiên của năm 2025!

Đây là quyển sách hay theo quan điểm cá nhân, vì nội dung không mới hay đột phá nên mình chỉ đánh giá 4*.

Hay vì cách viết đơn giản, sách cũng ngắn gọn nhưng khá sâu sắc, đòi hỏi vừa đọc vừa suy ngẫm và so sánh...TG chia sẻ những đúc kết, kim nghiệm và nhận định có tính ứng dụng chung nhưng cũng không phải ai cũng biết và liên kết nhau lại thành 1 tổng thể. Người đọc dễ nhớ và dễ ứng dụng để nhìn lại 3 NGUYÊN TẮC CƠ BẢN. Quyển sách này nghiên về hướng chiêm nghiệm/kỹ năng hơn là sách selfhelp "hô hào" mà giờ không được ưa chuộn ;)

[Jacob Petrossian · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was one of the first of which I head that presented personal development tips from a non New-age background since I had read 'The Road Less Travelled'. The book was a comprehensible, practical and helped me to question my lifestyle in a way which would ultimately improve it long term. I then began to listen to some of Steve Pavlina's talks. I don't agree wholeheartedly on his views regarding veganism and polygamy but this book was a great read.