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219 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1983

UNF! Why has Mr. Benson been hiding from me all this time?






"Mr. Benson had taken away my pride, but then he had replaced it with a new kind - the pride of belonging.This whole scene and the ones following it, resonated with me more than any others in the rest of the book. Not so much Jamie's involvement in them, but because of all the other people depicted. I could imagine the desperation and the boredom so easily. This disconnectedness and sheer want is very obvious to the onlooker, albeit on a less intense scale, at events like the Mardi Gras party. There are a lot of lonely guys out there.
But now I was like the rest of them: in such great need that anyone who would pay attention would be the man for tonight. There was no emotional bond to be considered."
But no one ever writes about the cumulative effect of SM. How every time becomes another building block in your respect for a bottom...... Every time I'd present him with a test or an obstacle and he'd get through it, the emotion of my pride would build. It was the constant willingness on his part to work at being worthy of me that created the ever-increasing respect I had for him.The rest of the scenes in the book fell into line with others that have been written since, but for me, those two sections captured the essence of that need and what people really into BDSM get out of the experience.
