What do you think?
Rate this book
Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn't Give You What You Want
What if God wants you to wait?
Most of us don’t willingly choose to wait. We pick the shortest lines at the grocery store and avoid construction routes whenever possible. These are relatively short holdups, but they point to the deeper truth of what we try to evade on the larger scale of our lives: the anguish and heartache we experience during extended times of waiting when something we have hoped for gets delayed. Because waiting is painful and hard, too often we try to rush through it, seeking to jump ahead to the hoped-for resolution, opportunity, or healing. It’s easy to overlook that waiting is an inevitable part of our walk with God.
Most of us don’t willingly choose to wait. We pick the shortest lines at the grocery store and avoid construction routes whenever possible. These are relatively short holdups, but they point to the deeper truth of what we try to evade on the larger scale of our lives: the anguish and heartache we experience during extended times of waiting when something we have hoped for gets delayed. Because waiting is painful and hard, too often we try to rush through it, seeking to jump ahead to the hoped-for resolution, opportunity, or healing. It’s easy to overlook that waiting is an inevitable part of our walk with God.
272 pages, Paperback
Published April 4, 2017
47 people are currently reading
1215 people want to read
About the author
Ann Swindell
6 books227 followersAnn Swindell writes stories that point to Christ’s presence in our day-to-day lives and the hope He brings to our hearts. She is the author of multiple books and the owner of Writing with Grace, where she teaches Christ-centered writing classes for women. Ann lives in West Michigan, and she enjoys adventuring with her family…usually with a cup of Earl Grey tea in hand.
Learn more at annswindell.com.
Learn more at annswindell.com.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 118 reviews
March 5, 2017
Ann Swindell's gorgeous book is exactly the book about trichotillomania I've been waiting for. She compares her suffering with the suffering of the Bleeding Woman in the Bible, enduring fatigue and isolation for twelve years as she silently deals with what her body is doing to her. And waiting for God to cure her. Spending all her money and energy and prayers for a cure. Waiting.
I’m not normally the religious type — I nod at the universe and do yoga and cross my fingers and send good vibes and pray when things are extra scary — but this book has a special power. So much of it felt lifted from my own life. Swindell talks about how she loves to read, but the pages of her books would be peppered with eyelashes she pulled out while she read. She talks about the lengthy makeup routine she put herself through every morning, hoping no one would ever notice what was hidden beneath the false eyelashes. She talks about how she revealed her bald eyelids to her fiance, how traumatic the moment was for her, even though he already knew.
From When the Universe Gives You the Book You Need at Book Riot.
I’m not normally the religious type — I nod at the universe and do yoga and cross my fingers and send good vibes and pray when things are extra scary — but this book has a special power. So much of it felt lifted from my own life. Swindell talks about how she loves to read, but the pages of her books would be peppered with eyelashes she pulled out while she read. She talks about the lengthy makeup routine she put herself through every morning, hoping no one would ever notice what was hidden beneath the false eyelashes. She talks about how she revealed her bald eyelids to her fiance, how traumatic the moment was for her, even though he already knew.
From When the Universe Gives You the Book You Need at Book Riot.
July 18, 2017
I am so grateful for these words and for Ann's willingness to take a risk in sharing her story. After devouring this book within 24 hours, I am excited to read back through it and spend time processing what the Lord wants to teach me in my own wait.
I don't typically cry in books, but I even found myself with tears in the corners of my eyes as Ann put to words the thoughts and questions that I have wrestled with myself, and perhaps the most wonderful aspect of the book is the way that she continually returns to truth in light of the cross, in every single chapter. It's clear that she herself has learned to fix her eyes on Christ, even in the midst of pain and suffering and shame, and it's evident that her heart is for each reader to shift their perspective.
I don't typically cry in books, but I even found myself with tears in the corners of my eyes as Ann put to words the thoughts and questions that I have wrestled with myself, and perhaps the most wonderful aspect of the book is the way that she continually returns to truth in light of the cross, in every single chapter. It's clear that she herself has learned to fix her eyes on Christ, even in the midst of pain and suffering and shame, and it's evident that her heart is for each reader to shift their perspective.
March 10, 2017
One of the most beautiful books on waiting that I have ever read. Several times throughout the book, the hair on my arms and neck would stand on end as Ann vividly describes her encounters with the Lord and how He has met her in her waiting. I am currently in a season of waiting on the Lord for a baby, and Ann's chapters on "When Waiting Feels Offensive" as well as "When Waiting Causes Shame" were especially encouraging to me. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. Ann's openness about her journey speaks to the most tender and vulnerable places of every soul who has ever endured a wait that didn't make earthly sense. Not to mention, Ann is a beautiful writer! The words flow freely and beautifully, making this memoir truly come to life.
February 28, 2017
So beautiful!! I love Ann's heart. This book is a treasure.
June 25, 2017
An excellent book on waiting from someone who has been there (and is still there). Swindell combines her creative reimagining of the Bleeding Woman's story (found in the gospels) with her own struggle with trichotillomania and with the truth of God's Word and His heart for His people.
Her writing is full of compassion and understanding, and I greatly appreciated her vulnerability. The writing was repetitive at times and sometimes seemed to drag, though being split into the three areas of focus that I mentioned helped to break it up a bit.
A couple of my favorite quotes:
"[Jesus] knows what it is to have no way out of his circumstances. He knows what it is to be broken, in his heart and in his limbs. His body pulverized. His spirit abandoned. He knows what it is to wait for God to come through - and to die in the waiting." (p. 17)
"The waiting sheared down my strength and hope. That's because there's a cost to waiting that's impossible to ignore: the cost of self-sufficiency. Waiting forces us to surrender our reliance on our own ability to pay up, to come through, to make it happen. The cost of waiting demands the payment of our self-sufficiency, and we pay in our acknowledgment of our inability to be enough." (p. 60)
Her writing is full of compassion and understanding, and I greatly appreciated her vulnerability. The writing was repetitive at times and sometimes seemed to drag, though being split into the three areas of focus that I mentioned helped to break it up a bit.
A couple of my favorite quotes:
"[Jesus] knows what it is to have no way out of his circumstances. He knows what it is to be broken, in his heart and in his limbs. His body pulverized. His spirit abandoned. He knows what it is to wait for God to come through - and to die in the waiting." (p. 17)
"The waiting sheared down my strength and hope. That's because there's a cost to waiting that's impossible to ignore: the cost of self-sufficiency. Waiting forces us to surrender our reliance on our own ability to pay up, to come through, to make it happen. The cost of waiting demands the payment of our self-sufficiency, and we pay in our acknowledgment of our inability to be enough." (p. 60)
April 1, 2017
The author gave me an ARC of this book for a review and I was very pleased! A message that comes from the heart goes straight to the heart. Ann was very brave to share her story and I shed tears. She compares her life to the story of the Bleeding Woman in the Bible. Ann struggles with trichotillomania but this is a message of hope for anyone who struggles with waiting in this broken world. We are helpless creatures in need of a Savior. Ann points us to Christ in this beautiful book. She speaks of hope and truth to the hurting soul.
June 29, 2020
This author shares her personal struggle and suffering with having Trichotillomania; begging God to heal her and not being healed. Thus the concept of the book, ‘what if God wants you to wait?’ I cannot recommend this book enough. It. Was. SO. Good!!!
September 26, 2022
The message of this book is so helpful and so important. I'm so thankful for Ann's vulnerability and her thoughtful writing.
January 22, 2025
A great reminder that waiting sometimes lasts our lifetime. But in that waiting, we are called to not stay in despair, but look to Christ and His promises.
August 23, 2017
Waiting. Waiting is a concept that is immediately met with apprehension. You instantly feel that inner struggle. In our society instant gratification is all around us. You want it now and if you can't have it right away the waiting can be torturous. In short, waiting is not something that may of us choose to do if we have the choice.
As a Christian, waiting is something that we can do a lot of in our Christian walk. We pray for something and we wait for God to answer. The waiting can be hard and sometimes even painful but it is usually in that time of waiting that we grow the most.
In Still Waiting, Ann Swindell tells her personal story of waiting for healing from trichotillomania and parallels it with the story of the Bleeding Woman in Mark 25. You feel the emotions of waiting interwoven in each story. I saw myself in so many moments since I have had seasons of my life of waiting, especially in regards to physical healing from a mysterious pelvic pain that I've had for the past six years that baffles many doctors and specialists.
While Ann waited to be healed from trichotillomania, or trich, she grew closer to Jesus "and that changed everything." As you read about Ann's story, and the various battles that she went through while dealing with this disorder, you can see yourself in the reflection. We've all been in a time where we can't control our circumstances. We are waiting for things to change. Still Waiting gives hope to the hopeless. God might not change whatever battle it is that you personally face but he can be by your side throughout the waiting and you will come out the other side stronger than you were before.
I felt uplifted after reading this book, though my heart goes out to the author. I was hoping that she would be free from her condition but it seems like it won't happen this side of heaven.
I loved that there were discussion questions at the end of the book so that you can focus on your own time of waiting and find Jesus in the midst. Bottom line: we all have to wait but what's important is WHO you focus on.
*Tyndale House Publishers has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
As a Christian, waiting is something that we can do a lot of in our Christian walk. We pray for something and we wait for God to answer. The waiting can be hard and sometimes even painful but it is usually in that time of waiting that we grow the most.
In Still Waiting, Ann Swindell tells her personal story of waiting for healing from trichotillomania and parallels it with the story of the Bleeding Woman in Mark 25. You feel the emotions of waiting interwoven in each story. I saw myself in so many moments since I have had seasons of my life of waiting, especially in regards to physical healing from a mysterious pelvic pain that I've had for the past six years that baffles many doctors and specialists.
While Ann waited to be healed from trichotillomania, or trich, she grew closer to Jesus "and that changed everything." As you read about Ann's story, and the various battles that she went through while dealing with this disorder, you can see yourself in the reflection. We've all been in a time where we can't control our circumstances. We are waiting for things to change. Still Waiting gives hope to the hopeless. God might not change whatever battle it is that you personally face but he can be by your side throughout the waiting and you will come out the other side stronger than you were before.
I felt uplifted after reading this book, though my heart goes out to the author. I was hoping that she would be free from her condition but it seems like it won't happen this side of heaven.
I loved that there were discussion questions at the end of the book so that you can focus on your own time of waiting and find Jesus in the midst. Bottom line: we all have to wait but what's important is WHO you focus on.
*Tyndale House Publishers has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
March 9, 2017
In her book, Still Waiting: Hope For When God Doesn't Give You What You Want, Ann Swindell tells the biblical story of the woman healed by Jesus who had been bleeding for 12 years and makes comparisons with her own personal struggles coping with Trichotillomania, a hair pulling disorder. Swindell skillfully weaves the two narratives so that the reader has a chance to walk beside the characters in their pain and gain insights and understandings that only an intimate friend might learn.
Swindell writes with vulnerability, authenticity and faith of her helplessness to overcome her condition and of the loneliness, pain, frustration and shame she experienced. Those who have struggled with difficult situations will recognize some of the feelings she describes, even if the particulars of their sources of pain are different. At times, I wanted less repetition and fewer words, but the frequent meadows of beauty of Swindell's prose and the word pictures she created made spending time learning about this woman of God and her struggles worth the journey.
Swindell unravels the role of the love of God throughout her long journey and of his faithfulness to accept her, value her, and work in and through her. Hope and faith are strong cords in the intertwined stories.
Hope and faith are sometimes frayed cords in my story. After my parents were divorced, my sister and I lived with our single mother until she was first hospitalized, when I was 10, with an extreme mental illness from which she never recovered. She bounced in and out of hospitals for decades before she died in 2013. There were several difficult issues to sort through in my family that complicated growing up and complicated my walk with God, begun while I was living in Hollygrove, a Christian children's home in Hollywood and in foster homes.
As a new Christian in the 1970s, I had the opportunity to attend Biola, a Christian college where my ambitions to follow Jesus were greater than my abilities and brokenness. And I felt defeated. But, God in his kindness, gave me a loving husband and home that has been a place of refuge and growth for more than 40 years while we raised four children who are now grown and have children of their own. Although my experience of waiting, like Swindell's story (so far), never resulted in physical healing for my mother, God has patiently been teaching me to trust him, by revealing his grace and compassion through many blessings and challenges. God has been waiting for me to grow up and let go of what could never be: I'd never have a normal family background and parents, I'd always be from the extremes. But, I can talk about it more now because God has been steadily healing broken places in me, and I feel more confident his love is at work through pain and results in our good. So, like Swindell, my hope is in God . . . because of his faithfulness, his purposes and his power.
While reading Swindell's story, some might make comparisons of degrees of pain, but that would be a mistake. Pain is pain and it hurts. The heart of Swindell's book reveals the character of a loving God at work through a difficult situation to create something and someone who is beautiful. God makes a difference in the journey and the destination. Swindell faithfully documents this truth, even though her fervent prayers did not receive the answer she wanted. Swindell's story is worth reading and will strike familiar chords with others who know what it is to want what can't be, but who find that God's presence and blessings are a better answer than we expected.
Disclosure: Tyndale House Publishers provided me with an electronic Advanced Reading Copy of this book for review purposes, with the understanding that I would write an honest and independent review.
Swindell writes with vulnerability, authenticity and faith of her helplessness to overcome her condition and of the loneliness, pain, frustration and shame she experienced. Those who have struggled with difficult situations will recognize some of the feelings she describes, even if the particulars of their sources of pain are different. At times, I wanted less repetition and fewer words, but the frequent meadows of beauty of Swindell's prose and the word pictures she created made spending time learning about this woman of God and her struggles worth the journey.
Swindell unravels the role of the love of God throughout her long journey and of his faithfulness to accept her, value her, and work in and through her. Hope and faith are strong cords in the intertwined stories.
Hope and faith are sometimes frayed cords in my story. After my parents were divorced, my sister and I lived with our single mother until she was first hospitalized, when I was 10, with an extreme mental illness from which she never recovered. She bounced in and out of hospitals for decades before she died in 2013. There were several difficult issues to sort through in my family that complicated growing up and complicated my walk with God, begun while I was living in Hollygrove, a Christian children's home in Hollywood and in foster homes.
As a new Christian in the 1970s, I had the opportunity to attend Biola, a Christian college where my ambitions to follow Jesus were greater than my abilities and brokenness. And I felt defeated. But, God in his kindness, gave me a loving husband and home that has been a place of refuge and growth for more than 40 years while we raised four children who are now grown and have children of their own. Although my experience of waiting, like Swindell's story (so far), never resulted in physical healing for my mother, God has patiently been teaching me to trust him, by revealing his grace and compassion through many blessings and challenges. God has been waiting for me to grow up and let go of what could never be: I'd never have a normal family background and parents, I'd always be from the extremes. But, I can talk about it more now because God has been steadily healing broken places in me, and I feel more confident his love is at work through pain and results in our good. So, like Swindell, my hope is in God . . . because of his faithfulness, his purposes and his power.
While reading Swindell's story, some might make comparisons of degrees of pain, but that would be a mistake. Pain is pain and it hurts. The heart of Swindell's book reveals the character of a loving God at work through a difficult situation to create something and someone who is beautiful. God makes a difference in the journey and the destination. Swindell faithfully documents this truth, even though her fervent prayers did not receive the answer she wanted. Swindell's story is worth reading and will strike familiar chords with others who know what it is to want what can't be, but who find that God's presence and blessings are a better answer than we expected.
Disclosure: Tyndale House Publishers provided me with an electronic Advanced Reading Copy of this book for review purposes, with the understanding that I would write an honest and independent review.
June 15, 2018
I usually end up not liking books in this category or at least think they could usually be cut in half. This book however was so good and helpful and the added narration of the Bleeding Woman was so rich and good to think deeper about just a few verses in the New Testament. I loved Ann's writing and the truth given.
August 28, 2018
Through her book, Ann weaves the story of her struggle with trichotillomania with the story of the Bleeding Woman (Luke 9:43-48). She shares about the beauty and lessons that can come from seasons of waiting themselves, especially when an answer or relief is not quick or easy.
We're in a season of waiting now and I almost didn't pick up the book because I didn't want to sit in it or see the good in it. Ann's story is real and raw and while I didn't connect to her story right away, she's drawn me in and it feels like sitting with a friend as she shares what God has done in her life. Her retelling of the story of the Bleeding Woman is eye opening and engaging - as she's given her a name and wonders about the twelve years of waiting before she touched the hem of Jesus' robe.
We're in a season of waiting now and I almost didn't pick up the book because I didn't want to sit in it or see the good in it. Ann's story is real and raw and while I didn't connect to her story right away, she's drawn me in and it feels like sitting with a friend as she shares what God has done in her life. Her retelling of the story of the Bleeding Woman is eye opening and engaging - as she's given her a name and wonders about the twelve years of waiting before she touched the hem of Jesus' robe.
April 28, 2017
Swindell gives us an in-depth look at the Biblical story of the bleeding woman and relates it to anyone who is waiting for healing, for themselves or for loved ones. Excellent for anyone who is waiting, which, I suppose, is all of us.
March 14, 2017
I just finished reading Still Waiting and I could pick it up and read it all over again! The way Ann shares her difficult story of battling trichotillomania along with sharing the story of the Bleeding Woman is so powerful. In each story, you can see yourself there, battling with your own struggles. This book really helped me realize that it's ok to wait, that your healing is coming, even if the answer for healing is a "no." Waiting can sometimes be our highest good!
I marked so many pages in this book and I'm glad to have it to look back on when I'm struggling. The writing is beautifully done and it had me hooked right away!
I marked so many pages in this book and I'm glad to have it to look back on when I'm struggling. The writing is beautifully done and it had me hooked right away!
March 5, 2017
A beautifully written memoir that shares Ann's heart for the Lord with every turn of page! Focused on waiting for wholeness and weaving her story into the story of the Bleeding Women from the Bible, SW has truly been a gift to me! Very timely, important, and inspiring read!
April 4, 2017
Ann beautifully weaves her personal story of waiting with the biblical account of the Bleeding Woman (Matthew 9:20-22), both women knowing the ache of waiting on God for healing.
What I appreciate most about Ann's book is that she did not wait to write it until she experienced full healing, until her wait came to an end. No. You see, Ann is still waiting. And, there is something so incredibly God-glorifying, hope-giving, and satisfying to my own heart to read words of hope and to be pointed rightly to the Source and Giver of both hope and healing from one who is still waiting herself.
This lends such credibility to the strong, sure message Ann conveys in "Still Waiting."
In her book's chapters, Ann breaks down the effects waiting has on one's soul, mind, body, and relationships with others and with God. She discusses how waiting makes one weak, broken, is costly, claims one's identity, feels offensive, brings shame, feels like suffering, and is risky. She concludes her book with a chapter entitled, "Hope for the Waiting Ones," but Ann does an effective job at sprinkling hope ALL throughout the book. You don't have to wait until the end for a strong dose of hope.
If you are waiting for anything or anyone and want to wait with hope, I strongly urge you to get your hands on Ann Swindell's, "Still Waiting."
*I wrote this endorsement to help spread the word about Ann's book, not solely or even primarily because I was chosen to be a part of her book launch team, but because I have been encouraged deeply by her words, believe strongly in the message of hope about which she writes, and appreciate greatly the skillful, artful way in which she presents that message. I did receive a copy of "Still Waiting" at no charge in order to read it before its official launch.
What I appreciate most about Ann's book is that she did not wait to write it until she experienced full healing, until her wait came to an end. No. You see, Ann is still waiting. And, there is something so incredibly God-glorifying, hope-giving, and satisfying to my own heart to read words of hope and to be pointed rightly to the Source and Giver of both hope and healing from one who is still waiting herself.
This lends such credibility to the strong, sure message Ann conveys in "Still Waiting."
In her book's chapters, Ann breaks down the effects waiting has on one's soul, mind, body, and relationships with others and with God. She discusses how waiting makes one weak, broken, is costly, claims one's identity, feels offensive, brings shame, feels like suffering, and is risky. She concludes her book with a chapter entitled, "Hope for the Waiting Ones," but Ann does an effective job at sprinkling hope ALL throughout the book. You don't have to wait until the end for a strong dose of hope.
If you are waiting for anything or anyone and want to wait with hope, I strongly urge you to get your hands on Ann Swindell's, "Still Waiting."
*I wrote this endorsement to help spread the word about Ann's book, not solely or even primarily because I was chosen to be a part of her book launch team, but because I have been encouraged deeply by her words, believe strongly in the message of hope about which she writes, and appreciate greatly the skillful, artful way in which she presents that message. I did receive a copy of "Still Waiting" at no charge in order to read it before its official launch.
May 16, 2017
A Story of Waiting
Twenty minutes on ice.
Twenty minutes on my feet.
Then back to the couch and the ice pack — and that was how I made it through the early days of mothering. Degenerative disc disease and pregnancy make for some painful and complicated logistics when they converge, but, oddly, it’s not the pain I remember most. What I remember most clearly is the frustration of being limited and the discipline of resting that was required for healing. The real suffering seemed to be in the waiting.
Anyone with a chronic condition of any type is familiar with the rhythms of hope and despair that go with waiting. Ann Swindell was diagnosed at the age of eleven with trichotillomania, defined by the American Journal of Psychiatry as a “poorly understood disorder characterized by repetitive hair pulling that leads to noticeable hair loss, distress, and social or functional impairment.” It is inexplicable and incurable, and it remains part of Ann’s life as she writes Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn’t Give You What You Want.
Ann lays her own story and struggle alongside the biblical account of the Bleeding Woman in Mark 5. Remember the story? After waiting — and bleeding, and consulting experts and spending all her net worth on cures that fell flat — for twelve years, this woman came to Jesus, depleted and out of options. She was miraculously healed, and this is where her story and Ann’s diverge. Nonetheless, Ann feels a special kinship with the Bleeding Woman simply because of the shared brokenness of waiting and of clinging to hope.
Waiting Is Part of the Groaning
Paul’s soaring words about hope and redemption in Romans 8 do not bypass the truth that all of creation deals with brokenness in some way — and, therefore, we wait. And while we wait because of this general and widespread brokenness, it is also true that we are broken because we are waiting. Underneath all the good that was happening in her growing up years and into young adulthood, Ann struggled with the shame and desperation that centered around a pair of hands that would not stop pulling out eyelashes and eyebrows — in spite of resolutions and wearing gloves and goggles and wrapping tape around her fingers.
There’s a misconception in the 21st century church that we can be “#strong” by ourselves, that all weakness is evil, and that healing is God’s will in every situation. It’s a pretty insupportable position in light of Paul’s words in II Corinthians 12:9:
“And [God] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
When Waiting Is All You Can Do
From experience, Ann offers principles that allow believers to experience the freedom of waiting well:
Lay down the false notion that you can fix yourself. Waiting well requires a surrender of the illusion of control and self-sufficiency.
Do not “create your identity around what you don’t have.” Even though it is tempting to fixate on lack, whether it is infertility or singleness or a chronic condition, the believer’s true identity is tied up in Christ who names and claims and loves. Until Ann stopped thinking of herself as damaged goods, she could not share her burden and receive the compassion of others.
Relinquish what God has withheld. I was so happy to find Elisabeth Elliot’s wisdom shared in the pages of Still Waiting: “. . . the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done.” (96)
Allow a soft heart to protect you from bitterness. Making the choice to be offended by God’s sovereign will “puts us in the judgment seat over God.” (105) Ann found that the understanding and kindness of others and the Truth she found in Scripture were key to accepting the will of God in assigning to her this particular trial, this particular chronic condition, this particular set of challenges and temptations to despair.
Scorn shame. As Jesus took the cross, he silenced shame once and for all. By confiding in a few safe people and by embracing the strong truth of Romans 8:1, Ann began to live in light of God’s love and acceptance even in the midst of the daily struggle.
Standing with Those Who Wait
Whenever authors share a unique journey of living with and overcoming obstacles, readers come away with insights that make us more sensitive to the pain of others as well as helpful ways of responding. One of the chief sources of pain in managing a chronic condition is loneliness. That would have been particularly true of the Bleeding Woman in Scripture, but it is clear from her actions that, somehow, she had managed to keep a shred of hope alive that kept her thinking, “If I can just get close to Jesus . . .” Encouragement to draw near to God will make it easier for those who are waiting to let Him worry about the outcome. Our unconditional acceptance and friendship may be the very thing that makes the presence of God palpable to those who wait.
Those of us who live a following life are characterized by waiting. Although healed spiritually, every believer waits in hope for the gift of full restoration. We serve an “on time God” — not an “on demand God” and our waiting is best managed through a focused attention on the next step of obedience in the present. As we come alongside those who are dealing with a painful and open-ended season of waiting, may we find grace to understand that our waiting cultivates longing for all that God has in store for us. In the meantime, it’s o.k. to keep on asking God for the healing our hearts long for — as we remind one another that God is trustworthy, even when the answer we receive is, “Wait.”
//
This book was provided by Tyndale Momentum, the nonfiction imprint of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., in exchange for my review. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Twenty minutes on ice.
Twenty minutes on my feet.
Then back to the couch and the ice pack — and that was how I made it through the early days of mothering. Degenerative disc disease and pregnancy make for some painful and complicated logistics when they converge, but, oddly, it’s not the pain I remember most. What I remember most clearly is the frustration of being limited and the discipline of resting that was required for healing. The real suffering seemed to be in the waiting.
Anyone with a chronic condition of any type is familiar with the rhythms of hope and despair that go with waiting. Ann Swindell was diagnosed at the age of eleven with trichotillomania, defined by the American Journal of Psychiatry as a “poorly understood disorder characterized by repetitive hair pulling that leads to noticeable hair loss, distress, and social or functional impairment.” It is inexplicable and incurable, and it remains part of Ann’s life as she writes Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn’t Give You What You Want.
Ann lays her own story and struggle alongside the biblical account of the Bleeding Woman in Mark 5. Remember the story? After waiting — and bleeding, and consulting experts and spending all her net worth on cures that fell flat — for twelve years, this woman came to Jesus, depleted and out of options. She was miraculously healed, and this is where her story and Ann’s diverge. Nonetheless, Ann feels a special kinship with the Bleeding Woman simply because of the shared brokenness of waiting and of clinging to hope.
Waiting Is Part of the Groaning
Paul’s soaring words about hope and redemption in Romans 8 do not bypass the truth that all of creation deals with brokenness in some way — and, therefore, we wait. And while we wait because of this general and widespread brokenness, it is also true that we are broken because we are waiting. Underneath all the good that was happening in her growing up years and into young adulthood, Ann struggled with the shame and desperation that centered around a pair of hands that would not stop pulling out eyelashes and eyebrows — in spite of resolutions and wearing gloves and goggles and wrapping tape around her fingers.
There’s a misconception in the 21st century church that we can be “#strong” by ourselves, that all weakness is evil, and that healing is God’s will in every situation. It’s a pretty insupportable position in light of Paul’s words in II Corinthians 12:9:
“And [God] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
When Waiting Is All You Can Do
From experience, Ann offers principles that allow believers to experience the freedom of waiting well:
Lay down the false notion that you can fix yourself. Waiting well requires a surrender of the illusion of control and self-sufficiency.
Do not “create your identity around what you don’t have.” Even though it is tempting to fixate on lack, whether it is infertility or singleness or a chronic condition, the believer’s true identity is tied up in Christ who names and claims and loves. Until Ann stopped thinking of herself as damaged goods, she could not share her burden and receive the compassion of others.
Relinquish what God has withheld. I was so happy to find Elisabeth Elliot’s wisdom shared in the pages of Still Waiting: “. . . the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done.” (96)
Allow a soft heart to protect you from bitterness. Making the choice to be offended by God’s sovereign will “puts us in the judgment seat over God.” (105) Ann found that the understanding and kindness of others and the Truth she found in Scripture were key to accepting the will of God in assigning to her this particular trial, this particular chronic condition, this particular set of challenges and temptations to despair.
Scorn shame. As Jesus took the cross, he silenced shame once and for all. By confiding in a few safe people and by embracing the strong truth of Romans 8:1, Ann began to live in light of God’s love and acceptance even in the midst of the daily struggle.
Standing with Those Who Wait
Whenever authors share a unique journey of living with and overcoming obstacles, readers come away with insights that make us more sensitive to the pain of others as well as helpful ways of responding. One of the chief sources of pain in managing a chronic condition is loneliness. That would have been particularly true of the Bleeding Woman in Scripture, but it is clear from her actions that, somehow, she had managed to keep a shred of hope alive that kept her thinking, “If I can just get close to Jesus . . .” Encouragement to draw near to God will make it easier for those who are waiting to let Him worry about the outcome. Our unconditional acceptance and friendship may be the very thing that makes the presence of God palpable to those who wait.
Those of us who live a following life are characterized by waiting. Although healed spiritually, every believer waits in hope for the gift of full restoration. We serve an “on time God” — not an “on demand God” and our waiting is best managed through a focused attention on the next step of obedience in the present. As we come alongside those who are dealing with a painful and open-ended season of waiting, may we find grace to understand that our waiting cultivates longing for all that God has in store for us. In the meantime, it’s o.k. to keep on asking God for the healing our hearts long for — as we remind one another that God is trustworthy, even when the answer we receive is, “Wait.”
//
This book was provided by Tyndale Momentum, the nonfiction imprint of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., in exchange for my review. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
April 4, 2017
This book is an absolute masterpiece, but what I love most is that Ann Swindell would say the masterpiece is all God’s handiwork. This book is a stunning account of her struggle with a chronic condition, her prayer and her waiting, her tastes of God’s grace and power and redemption.
I cried my way through each chapter, feeling simultaneously heard, challenged, and loved right where I am. The best way I can describe this book is that it feels like a dear friend is wrapping you in a warm embrace, telling you it’s going to be okay, stroking your hair, and then helping you stand and face the day.
I read this book right when I returned to work after maternity leave, still in the midst of a traumatic recovery from childbirth. I soaked up and clung tightly to every word as Ann offered me such hope and healing, pointing me back to Jesus. I will reread this book many more times in my life, and I’m sure I will glean new wisdom each time. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
I cried my way through each chapter, feeling simultaneously heard, challenged, and loved right where I am. The best way I can describe this book is that it feels like a dear friend is wrapping you in a warm embrace, telling you it’s going to be okay, stroking your hair, and then helping you stand and face the day.
I read this book right when I returned to work after maternity leave, still in the midst of a traumatic recovery from childbirth. I soaked up and clung tightly to every word as Ann offered me such hope and healing, pointing me back to Jesus. I will reread this book many more times in my life, and I’m sure I will glean new wisdom each time. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
Read
April 13, 2019Full of paradigm-shifting, illuminating ideas for me: Everyone has brokenness in their life, the kind that is not going to be fixed this side of heaven. Honesty about it leads to growth. Honesty with others brings enriched fellowship, and help. Honesty with God is obviously necessary for a Christian, but should be "heartfelt, not hostile." I am prone to either living in denial of my brokenness and the pain it causes, or making the pain into an idol. I want to focus on the One who knows my suffering. Thank you, Ann Swindell!
December 7, 2017
Was surprisingly disappointed with this book. I didn’t love the creative liberties that Ann took with the story of the Bleeding Woman through naming her and adding much more to her story than is present in the scriptures. I think we must be very cautious with this idea that we can take scripture and then expand on it to help communicate our case.
Also felt like this was more of a biography about Ann and less of a book about God/ his presence in the waiting. Ann is very vulnerable and transparent, but at times still hard to connect with.
Also felt like this was more of a biography about Ann and less of a book about God/ his presence in the waiting. Ann is very vulnerable and transparent, but at times still hard to connect with.
March 18, 2017
Cannot recommend this book enough. Ann does an amazing job weaving her story together with scripture in an honest, refreshing way. Walking away from this book made me view my own story in a new way and did indeed give me hope for all the places I find myself waiting.
March 22, 2017
Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn't Give You What You Want
"Still Waiting" by Ann Swindell is an amazing story parallelling Ann's own struggle with an incurable disease and the Bleeding Woman in the bible. The book translates God's grace in "the waiting" periods of our lives and how He works in and through us, drawing us closer to Him. Ann shares her own battle with Trichotillomania, which is defined by uncontrollable hair pulling. She takes the reader alongside her journey, marking it with how God was there in her "wait" to be healed.
We are all waiting for something, waiting for help with financial distress, marriage problems, sickness, and more. Ann shares that it's in those times of waiting where we truly experience the Lord. She takes the reader with her, baring her soul, authentic and transparent, as she shares her own struggles and that of the 12-year long wait for the Bleeding Woman. Both waiting for healing. Waiting in faith and trust in the Lord.
Ann's amazing writing truly shines throughout this book, especially in her discussions of the hard places in "Still Waiting". She talks openly how trying and tormenting the waiting can be, how we often struggle and falter as we go through these times. It is in those very times that God shows up in His glory, giving us hope, reminding us of His love, and carrying us through these periods of wait.
The story of the Bleeding Woman intertwines with Ann's own story relaying what she had to endure because of her condition; isolation, loneliness, and being labeled as "unclean". Twelve long years of being isolated for being deemed "unclean" until the day she touched the hem of Jesus's robe. She was then healed, released from her condition, through her faith in Jesus.
I loved this book, "Still Waiting" by Ann Swindell! I couldn't put it down! Ann speaks with honesty, grace, love, faith, compassion and understanding. She shares the journey of her disease in such a raw, authentic voice. She never wanted to disclose her diagnosis with close friends, because of the shame she carried. Ann now shares it with the world, her mission is to bring others to Christ, revealing His healing love and grace through her own story of waiting. God always shows up, especially in our times of waiting.
One of my favorite snippets from the book is, "Waiting often pushes our buttons. It pushes our buttons of anxiety and shame. It pushes our buttons of weakness and worry. In all those places, waiting asks us if God is still good and if he really sees and loves us. It pushes our buttons of identity and worth. Hope is the glass wall covering those buttons, providing protection for our hearts while we wait. Although it may get walloped and slammed against, hope is the antidote to despair, and it's the only way to live through prolonged seasons of waiting without losing our faith or our sanity." By Ann Swindell from Chapter 10 of "Still Waiting".
Ann Swindell's book really spoke to my own seasons of waiting as she exposed her own. She shares how at times we feel our prayers are going unanswered, but our prayers are always heard. Her words really resonated with me and I felt drawn into her story and that of the Bleeding Woman. Ann speaks in a very relatable way, with compassion and kindness. I believe this book is a good fit for each one of us because we've all experienced those seasons of waiting in our lives. Ann Swindell has written an outstanding book and I have been truly blessed by it.
"Still Waiting" by Ann Swindell is an amazing story parallelling Ann's own struggle with an incurable disease and the Bleeding Woman in the bible. The book translates God's grace in "the waiting" periods of our lives and how He works in and through us, drawing us closer to Him. Ann shares her own battle with Trichotillomania, which is defined by uncontrollable hair pulling. She takes the reader alongside her journey, marking it with how God was there in her "wait" to be healed.
We are all waiting for something, waiting for help with financial distress, marriage problems, sickness, and more. Ann shares that it's in those times of waiting where we truly experience the Lord. She takes the reader with her, baring her soul, authentic and transparent, as she shares her own struggles and that of the 12-year long wait for the Bleeding Woman. Both waiting for healing. Waiting in faith and trust in the Lord.
Ann's amazing writing truly shines throughout this book, especially in her discussions of the hard places in "Still Waiting". She talks openly how trying and tormenting the waiting can be, how we often struggle and falter as we go through these times. It is in those very times that God shows up in His glory, giving us hope, reminding us of His love, and carrying us through these periods of wait.
The story of the Bleeding Woman intertwines with Ann's own story relaying what she had to endure because of her condition; isolation, loneliness, and being labeled as "unclean". Twelve long years of being isolated for being deemed "unclean" until the day she touched the hem of Jesus's robe. She was then healed, released from her condition, through her faith in Jesus.
I loved this book, "Still Waiting" by Ann Swindell! I couldn't put it down! Ann speaks with honesty, grace, love, faith, compassion and understanding. She shares the journey of her disease in such a raw, authentic voice. She never wanted to disclose her diagnosis with close friends, because of the shame she carried. Ann now shares it with the world, her mission is to bring others to Christ, revealing His healing love and grace through her own story of waiting. God always shows up, especially in our times of waiting.
One of my favorite snippets from the book is, "Waiting often pushes our buttons. It pushes our buttons of anxiety and shame. It pushes our buttons of weakness and worry. In all those places, waiting asks us if God is still good and if he really sees and loves us. It pushes our buttons of identity and worth. Hope is the glass wall covering those buttons, providing protection for our hearts while we wait. Although it may get walloped and slammed against, hope is the antidote to despair, and it's the only way to live through prolonged seasons of waiting without losing our faith or our sanity." By Ann Swindell from Chapter 10 of "Still Waiting".
Ann Swindell's book really spoke to my own seasons of waiting as she exposed her own. She shares how at times we feel our prayers are going unanswered, but our prayers are always heard. Her words really resonated with me and I felt drawn into her story and that of the Bleeding Woman. Ann speaks in a very relatable way, with compassion and kindness. I believe this book is a good fit for each one of us because we've all experienced those seasons of waiting in our lives. Ann Swindell has written an outstanding book and I have been truly blessed by it.
May 22, 2017
"When we have begged and demanded from God all that we can, and when he still doesn’t change our situation, we’re left with a choice: we can choose offense with him, or we can choose obedience.
Offense is a terror of a thing: it puts us in the judgment seat over God. It sets us in the place of declaring what he should do and how he should work. And then, when he doesn’t do what we think he should — when he won’t bow to our ways of understanding — the stance of offense tricks us into thinking we have a right to condemn God. We strong-arm God, we yell at him, we tell him all the things he’s not. We point our finger at him and tell him he’s wrong. We tell him how the world really is; we sneer that he isn’t being God the way that he should be.
And while it’s good to be honest with God, there is a distinct difference between heartfelt honesty and hostile honesty. Heartfelt honesty comes to God on its knees. Hostile honesty comes to God pointing a finger. And if we let our honesty turn hostile — if we become offended enough — we will walk away. We will judge God and choose to go on without him."
Swindell, Ann (2017-04-04). Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn’t Give You What You Want (pp. 105-106). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition.
Offense is a terror of a thing: it puts us in the judgment seat over God. It sets us in the place of declaring what he should do and how he should work. And then, when he doesn’t do what we think he should — when he won’t bow to our ways of understanding — the stance of offense tricks us into thinking we have a right to condemn God. We strong-arm God, we yell at him, we tell him all the things he’s not. We point our finger at him and tell him he’s wrong. We tell him how the world really is; we sneer that he isn’t being God the way that he should be.
And while it’s good to be honest with God, there is a distinct difference between heartfelt honesty and hostile honesty. Heartfelt honesty comes to God on its knees. Hostile honesty comes to God pointing a finger. And if we let our honesty turn hostile — if we become offended enough — we will walk away. We will judge God and choose to go on without him."
Swindell, Ann (2017-04-04). Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn’t Give You What You Want (pp. 105-106). Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.. Kindle Edition.
August 23, 2017
Have you ever wondered why God hasn't healed you from something? Have you ever wondered why God seems to be silent about something important in your life? Do you have disappointments you are holding against God? Do you struggle with shame? Do you feel like you don't measure up? There are so many things in life for which you may be "still waiting". I recommend this book for you.
Are you dealing with an illness, a deformity, an addiction, a shameful habit, something that makes you feel "different", a burden, a secret, a problem so big that only a miracle could fix? Please read this book.
Ann Swindell has a way with words that leads you to trust God and hold onto hope even when you don't see progress. She uses scripture and the story of the "woman with an issue of blood for 12 years" to help tell her own story of waiting and to give you hope and courage.
These two quotes from the final chapter of the book help sum up what the author is teaching:
"Hope--when it is founded in Christ--will never truly disappoint us. Hope in anything other than Christ will fail."
"No struggle, no trial, and no suffering can keep [God's] unquenchable love from us."
Are you dealing with an illness, a deformity, an addiction, a shameful habit, something that makes you feel "different", a burden, a secret, a problem so big that only a miracle could fix? Please read this book.
Ann Swindell has a way with words that leads you to trust God and hold onto hope even when you don't see progress. She uses scripture and the story of the "woman with an issue of blood for 12 years" to help tell her own story of waiting and to give you hope and courage.
These two quotes from the final chapter of the book help sum up what the author is teaching:
"Hope--when it is founded in Christ--will never truly disappoint us. Hope in anything other than Christ will fail."
"No struggle, no trial, and no suffering can keep [God's] unquenchable love from us."
May 7, 2017
As a writer and speaker, Ann Swindell wants to see women freed through God’s love. She loves words and gained a Master of Arts in Writing from DePaul University. She is married, has a daughter, and is passionate about helping people strengthen their writing whilst journeying with Christ.
This is the story of Ann Swindell’s journey as a sufferer of Trichotillomania - hair pulling -whilst learning, through the scriptural story of the woman who had been bleeding for many years, God’s reason for allowing her to wait for a solution to her problem.
A reader beginning this book is confronted with the distress surrounding the trichotillomania from which Ann suffered. This distress is also apparent in the bleeding woman story (Ann has called her Sarah) in scripture. The distress is so poignant in both Ann’s and Sarah’s stories that the reader wants to find some hope as a catharsis to the strong emotions that the stories evoke. This hope the reader is looking for is God! Ann’s home and school life were described as idyllic rather than stressful - stress is often considered a trigger for the condition.
In the second last chapter Ann relayed some questions that God asked her, and what his final response was. Once I read this particular section of the book I felt as if God were saying it directly to me, reassuring me that my strength also comes from his love. It was an extremely powerful moment for me as a reader. Like Ann, and I’m sure many other people around the world, I am also waiting for healing. The waiting is not always easy but it will be well worth it in the end. God is our hope, and that is our strength.
Thank you Ann for being brave enough to let us into this life-long condition and the positive journey you are on with your Lord and Saviour.
Tyndale House Publishers has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book.
This is the story of Ann Swindell’s journey as a sufferer of Trichotillomania - hair pulling -whilst learning, through the scriptural story of the woman who had been bleeding for many years, God’s reason for allowing her to wait for a solution to her problem.
A reader beginning this book is confronted with the distress surrounding the trichotillomania from which Ann suffered. This distress is also apparent in the bleeding woman story (Ann has called her Sarah) in scripture. The distress is so poignant in both Ann’s and Sarah’s stories that the reader wants to find some hope as a catharsis to the strong emotions that the stories evoke. This hope the reader is looking for is God! Ann’s home and school life were described as idyllic rather than stressful - stress is often considered a trigger for the condition.
In the second last chapter Ann relayed some questions that God asked her, and what his final response was. Once I read this particular section of the book I felt as if God were saying it directly to me, reassuring me that my strength also comes from his love. It was an extremely powerful moment for me as a reader. Like Ann, and I’m sure many other people around the world, I am also waiting for healing. The waiting is not always easy but it will be well worth it in the end. God is our hope, and that is our strength.
Thank you Ann for being brave enough to let us into this life-long condition and the positive journey you are on with your Lord and Saviour.
Tyndale House Publishers has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book.
December 14, 2018
This book is the gracious mingling of Ann Swindell’s story of longing, brokenness, and healing and the story of the bleeding woman from the gospels. This book has forever changed the way I will look at what it means to be healed by Jesus. Swindell brings clarity and purpose to seasons of waiting through lessons learned in her own life, lessons wrung from her heart through many tears and conversations with the Lord. I was especially struck by her thought that waiting is costly; there is a deep cost to waiting well and obediently, but Christ is so worthy of the price of our faithful waiting. I have never personally walked through Swindell’s struggles, but her writing allows you to feel as though you have lived her experiences alongside her, and gives plenty of space to relate your own story with hers. This book is engaging, gospel-centered, and invites the reader to sit in the tapestry of God’s grace He is weaving in each of our stories.
June 18, 2018
This book was such a gripping and refreshing read. Ann re-imagines the full story of the bleeding woman, whose healing was told in the gospels. Even though I knew what was going to happen, my breath caught and tears threatened as Ann describes the moment she is healed.
I think what I most loved about this book was that it lived up to its title. The author has a condition that she lives with and has asked God countless times to remove it from her. Ann doesn't write this book from the other end of healing; instead she is still in this waiting, and shares her story and God's truth in it all. She's in the trenches of waiting, not peering down from her lofty position of having gotten what she's petitioned God for. There's something special about reading a book from an author who writes from such an authentic perspective.
I think what I most loved about this book was that it lived up to its title. The author has a condition that she lives with and has asked God countless times to remove it from her. Ann doesn't write this book from the other end of healing; instead she is still in this waiting, and shares her story and God's truth in it all. She's in the trenches of waiting, not peering down from her lofty position of having gotten what she's petitioned God for. There's something special about reading a book from an author who writes from such an authentic perspective.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 13, 2017
I read this book in one sitting, and cried at least 5 times. Ann's stark honesty about her condition and struggles and frustration is so moving, and so relatable, but I loved most how she made it clear that our brokenness is our path to God. I've never heard it put that way but it's made me look at my own wait with fresh perspective. I'll be returning to the (many) passages I highlighted tomorrow... tonight my head just feels full of emotion and hope. While I felt there was some repetition of sentiments and explanations, her writing experience and credentials prove themselves, and I'm thinking it was an intentionally done for emphasis on various points. This is a moving read, and impossible to put down.
September 27, 2018
If you are in a season of waiting, this book could be just the gift for you. The author shares her personal struggle with waiting for healing, as she examines the waiting that the "Bleeding Woman" in the New Testament must have walked through before she touched the hem of Jesus' garment. Every chapter begins with a retelling of a portion of that story from Scriptures, and then Ann takes the reader into the heart of her own story and the Grace that God has poured over her life, even as she is still waiting today. If you have been brushed aside by "fast & easy" Scriptures, or told to just "get on with life," this book will bring you encouragement to press deeper into the mercy of God, and to let Him hold you through the waiting
Displaying 1 - 30 of 118 reviews