Five Go Parenting

Enid Blyton for Grown-Ups #5

by Bruno Vincent

Bringing up a baby would surely be kid's play for The Five. How hard could it possibly be?! When the doorbell rings one Saturday afternoon, the last thing the Five were expecting to find on their doorstep was a baby... But the Five are next of kin to Cousin Rupert and his wife, so when they find themselves in a spot of bother and are destined for a short spell behind bars, Anne, Dick, George and Anne are the first port of call. First, it's the fear and the tiredness that kicks in. They are terrified at being responsible for this new life and have no idea they're doing it right. Why is it crying? They use Dr Google constantly, who whatever the situation offers the same range of advice from 'don't worry about it' to 'rush her to the A&E'. 'Why is she crying?' they constantly ask. 'Why?' It keeps them up all night every night, until they are reduced to walking ghosts, haunted by a numb and impotent fury. Is this an adventure too far for our Five?

Genres: Humor, Fiction, Comedy, Short Stories, Parenting, Adult

96 pages, Hardcover

First published November 3, 2016

About the author

Bruno Vincent was a bookseller and book editor before he was an author. His humour books for grown-ups, co-authored with Jon Butler, were national bestsellers and have been translated into seven languages. The TUMBLEWATER books are his first for children.

Reviews

[Sonja Rosa Lisa ♡ · Rating 3 out of 5]

Julian, George, Dick und Anne sind mittlerweile Mitte 20 und leben in einer WG zusammen. Kurzfristig und ungeplant müssen sie auf das Baby eines Cousins aufpassen und sind damit etwas überfordert. Wie versorgt und pflegt man ein Baby richtig?
** Der Titel des Buches ist ein wenig irreführend, finde ich. Mit Helikoptereltern hat es wenig zu tun, wenn man einfach nur unsicher ist, wie man ein kleines Baby richtig versorgt.
Ansonsten fand ich das Buch etwas seltsam, vielleicht aber auch nur, weil man die "Fünf Freunde" halt anders kennt. Jünger und abenteuerlicher.
Dennoch hat mich die Geschichte aber irgendwie unterhalten können, auch wenn sie etwas merkwürdig war :)

[David Sarkies · Rating 3 out of 5]

Babysitting Blues
20 May 2017

I thought I have read all of the Famous Five books, that is until I wandered into a bookshoop and casually saw some hardcover books sitting on the counter. My eye wandered over Five Give Up the Booze, and a was a little surprised to note that Enid Blyton may have actually written some more. At first it didn’t click, so I had another look and noted that there was another one called Five on Brexit Island. It was about that time that I realised that it would have been impossible for Blyton to have written these books because she has been dead quite a while, so fortunately does not have to go through the farce that happens to be Brexit.

Anyway, as you have probablty worked out by now, these aren’t actually the traditional Famous Five books – rather they are spoofs of the original series, though I do sort of wonder whether the Five are actually much older than they were in the books. In one sense they are, particularly since Dick and Julian seem to want to spend an awful lot of time down at the pub, and they are also living together in a flat in London, however another part of it feels as if they are simply the same old Famous Five from all those years ago who have just been caught up in the modern world (the scene with Anne at the mothers’ club was somewhat amusing).

So, we have the Famous Five busting open an illegal racket, this time involving one of their cousins. However, what they didn’t realise is that when he and his wife landed up in prison they had a baby girl and the department of welfare, instead of putting the child into a foster home, decided to dump it onto the Famous Five, namely because they believe that it is better for the child to go to a family member than to a bunch of strangers. Well, all of the sudden they have to learn how to deal with a baby and all of the problems, and hilarity, that goes along with it. For instance poor Dick and Julian are no longer allowed to go to the pub, and also their lives are suddenly caught up with looking after a child as opposed to actually going out and solving mysteries.

The book is actually rather episodic in that after the first couple of introductory chapters, and the final couple that basically wind everything up, each of the chapters deal with an event in the life of the baby. For instance they go about trying to decide which school to go to, and when they choose the Catholic School they discover that they have to be practising Catholics to send their children there, so they suddenly have to brush up on their Catholic doctrine. Also we have Anne at the mothers’ and babies’ club, as well as Dick and Julian at the daddys’ club (which does raise a few interesting questions).

When I first saw these books I decided that I would get one just to see what it is like and whether I would consider some of the others. Honestly, it was a fun and enjoyable read, and I would certainly consider getting a couple of the others, if only for a bit of a laugh, but in the end I couldn’t bring myself to going too deep into this series. However, bring on Brexit Island.

[Hilary · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't expect this to be good but it was actually a very fun read. The Famous Five, now grown up along with an everlasting Timmy are in present day London when they find themselves caring for a baby. In true famous five style they all pull together to get through the rigours of parenthood. The author has done a really good job in giving you grown up versions of the characters, I think he has matured their personalities accurately and it really was very funny in places. Original illustrations accompany the story.

I would highly recommend this to readers who have enjoyed The Famous Five books.

[Tracey · Rating 2 out of 5]

Got this as a Christmas pressie.
A nice little parody on Enid Blytons famous five books where our heros are grown up using modern technology i phones and computers etc.
They find themselves in charge of a 6 month old baby and the fun begins learning to care for her! Nappies, crying, feeding etc.
As a new parent you'd probably get some good laughs out of this book.

[Hastings75 · Rating 3 out of 5]

2nd book in the series and also found this a further satire of a theme (this time "first time parents") and satire of the personality types of each of The Famous Five.

I really enjoyed the brief novelette but have deducted one star as I enjoyed the "Strategy Day" book better. It may be that I can relate to that theme better (felt like I was almost there in the earlier book) which in itself, is a credit to Bruno Vincent's writing. Maybe parents of young kids may award the extra couple of stars??!!

All in all, a good book. Bring on "Gluten Free"!

[Mimi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining, especially as parent of an infant. Again, a bit of a time warp feeling, but not as much as in Five Give Up Booze. Also, I decided these stories take place in an alternate universe, and the perceived anachronistics didn't bother me as much after that.

[Vera · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got this for a friend who loves Enid Blyton and is a new parent as well.
The author succeeds at emulating Blyton's style while poking fun at the ups and downs of today's parenting culture.
I'm pretty sure that my friend is going to enjoy this as much as i did.

[Renita D'Silva · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved this fun read.

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tough to rate. It’s cliche ridden trash, but was just the pick me up I needed. Illustrations are fun.

[Dane Cobain · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was okay but it's not my favourite. Perhaps part of the reason for that is that I don't like kids and so even though this book is a send up of the "delight" that is becoming a parent, I still didn't like reading about it in the first place.

Still, if you have a friend who's either expecting or is a new parent, this would make for a pretty good gift. It has a fun sense of humour and the illustrations are great. Enjoy.

[Jo_Scho_Reads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious Famous Five parody which has sat on my bookshelves for YEARS. It’s actually very well done, very much in the style of Blyton but basically ripping the piss out of Julian, Dick, George and Anne.

In this adventure they end up looking after a screamingx wriggling baby! Ugh they all say, but eventually baby Lily wins them over.

Very funny

[Jasmine · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a new parent I found this hilarious and relatable. I haven't read any of the original Enid Blyton books, so can't comment on how the style compares to the originals.

[Kirsty · Rating 4 out of 5]

Parody books seem to be in vogue at present; walk into any bookshop, and the chances are you will be confronted by a large table spread with such things as We're All Going on a Bar Hunt in the first minute. I normally don't buy into bookish trends, preferring to choose my own, often marginally obscure, reads at my leisure. When I spotted that the Famous Five had been updated for the twenty-first century, however, I couldn't bring myself to let the books pass me by.

I was an enormous fan of Enid Blyton as a child, and all of my copies of the Famous Five series have been passed down by my mother, a once avid reader of the series herself. We both laughed mirthfully at Five Go Gluten Free and Five on Brexit Island when they plopped through the letterbox just before Christmas. The other two titles which I purchased on a great deal from The Book People were the slightly less amusing Five Go Parenting and Five Go On a Strategy Away Day.

I'm still reeling from the Brexit decision, and thought I would begin with that parody. The storyline deals with the gang avoiding real life on the night of the referendum, and retiring to George's territory of Kirrin Island for a brief holiday. A fierce war soon ensues between George, a staunch remainer, and Julian, a traitor who voted to leave the EU. George is so horrified that she makes the decision that Kirrin Island itself should leave Britain, and holds her own referendum to that effect. Here, Vincent provides rather a light take on politics, which is both humorous and well-informed. The characters are still similar to their childhood counterparts, something exacerbated with the use of the series' original illustrations. I felt myself very much disliking Julian in this volume due to his beliefs, whereas as a child I had been relatively indifferent to him. Five on Brexit Island will not heal the pain of the referendum, but it is clever and well-crafted, and provides a bit of light relief.

Five Go Gluten Free was next for me. Rather than choosing to follow a gluten free diet for medical reasons, Anne - very much a fan of health fads - decides that the whole group should cut out the majority of the foodstuffs that they so love; no pies, chips, or beer going forward. I found this volume the most funny of the four which I have read, particularly as I so associate the majority of Blyton's child characters with a very British love of picnics and midnight feasts. The Famous Five are always eating, so the challenge of macrobiotic and wholefoods proves highly problematic. There are plenty of laugh-out-loud moments here, and a plethora of amusing one-liners. In this book particularly, the five translate very well to the modern world, and there is a marvellous feel of the utmost nostalgia to it.

My penultimate parody was Five Go Parenting, in which the group are given cousin Rupert Kirrin's baby; he and his Eastern European wife have been put in prison after another one of their illegal schemes, and six-month-old Lily comes to live in the surprisingly incredibly spacious London flat which the five share. This was an amusing look into the world of parenting by those who were utterly unsure as to what to do, or how much the addition of a tiny human could change their way of life. Witty and well-executed, Vincent's writing in this volume particularly echoes Blyton's. I would deem Five Go Parenting a splendid tongue-in-cheek gift for the new parent, or a funny slice of nostalgia for those whose children are a little older.

Five Go on a Strategy Away Day was my least favourite of the series by far. I awarded it a three-star rating, but didn't find it that funny at all, and indeed, there were no laughing aloud moments for me. In the book, the four human members of the group who, of course, work with one another, head into the countryside for a team bonding session. It culminates in an orienteering exercise, in which they are effectively up against all of the members of the Secret Seven. I did enjoy this merging of the groups, but found that here, the storyline was a touch lacking.

At just over 100 pages each, Bruno Vincent's Blyton parodies are the perfect reads to give as gifts, or to settle down with yourself if you have an hour or two to spare.

[Adam Stone · Rating 4 out of 5]

LOL!

[Eustacia Tan · Rating 3 out of 5]

After reading Abi of Pellinor’s review of one of the Famous Five parodies, I somehow ended up in a secondhand bookstore in Manchester where I saw a copy of Five Go Parenting. Almost immediately, I knew that this would be one of my souvenirs from the trip, especially since my interest in the series was already piqued!

Five Go Parenting starts after the Famous Five foil a plot by their cousin Rupert and his wife. Unfortunately, they didn’t realise that their heroic actions would lead to them being responsible for baby Lily, the daughter of cousin Rupert. The rest of the story basically concerns the Five as they learn to tackle the challenges of parenthood, arguably a more challenging task than foiling the plans of villains.

I enjoyed this book for the most part! While this isn’t as funny as a good Terry Pratchett novel, I definitely found a lot of things to smile about. It also helped that the style of the book mimicked the original Famous Five adventures, so it felt like a blast from the past and a new story at the same time. I probably would have enjoyed this more if I was a parent, but I am an aunt to a few nieces and nephews so I understood most of the challenges that Julian, Dick, George and Anne faced (and felt the same sense of relief that I’m not the one dealing with a crying baby).

Another thing I liked were the illustrations because they really made the book feel like a Famous Five adventure! They seem to be taken from the original books, but with new captions put on, so the pictures aren’t super relevant, but they mostly fit.

Overall, this was a fun read. I’m not super tempted to get the other books in the series, but as a fan of Enid Blyton, I’m glad that I read this. I’m probably going to ask my cousins if they want to read this too.

This review was first posted at Eustea Reads

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a fan of Famous Five and a new parent this book was perfect. It both brought back fond memories of childhood and I could identify with almost every parenting scenario so perfectly portrayed. Laugh out loud.

[Tracey · Rating 5 out of 5]

At 39 weeks pregnant this book really hit the spot!

[Jenna Mills · Rating 2 out of 5]

A lame story, but a bit of fun with the odd thing I could vaguely relate to.

[Iain Hamill · Rating 2 out of 5]

Couple of funny lines but remains average I think.

[Sarah · Rating 1 out of 5]

Okay, das war noch schlechter als das erste Buch. Es war einfach auch gar nicht lustig und mit Helikoptereltern hat es rein gar nichts zu tun gehabt.

[Joanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read quite a few of these Famous Five for Grown-Ups books and this is my favourite of those I've read so far. It is so funny to read about the five with no clue what to do for once! "We've never failed on an adventure before. There will be a way through this and we'll find it." says Anne optimistically!

The adventure is looking after baby Lily after they helped to have her parents put away in prison. Faced with instant parenthood and with no experience of children before, they turn to the experts to find out how to do simple things like feed and change the baby.  Exhausted from lack of sleep, they can't decide what advice to follow:  "They rapidly learnt that all parenting literature fell strictly into one of two opposing camps. Both sounded absolutely convincing." 

All parents will recognise the experiences the Five go through and will be smiling knowingly as they navigate the perils of trying to fit in with the established groups of parents at swimming lessons or exercise classes. And then there is the pressure of moving into the right catchment area to get young Lily into the right school - even if she is only a few months old!

The Famous Five for Grown-ups series is great fun to read and a must for any grown-up Enid Blyton fan. Parents in particular will enjoy reading about the ineptitude of the Five as they struggle with parenthood. Bruno Vincent really captures the feel of the original books, and the personalities of the Five while poking gentle fun at modern life.

[Stacey Broadbent · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this! I was given this book for my birthday I was super excited to get stuck into it and see how they'd turned these beloved tales into something for adults - and it was hilarious! So many laugh out loud moments :)
For anyone who doesn't know, these are spoofs of the children's books, The Famous Five by Enid Blyton. I actually haven't read any of the Famous Five books myself, but I did read other Enid Blyton books, so I felt right at home reading this.

As a mother myself, I could remember just how hard those first few months were when you had no idea what you were doing. The need to find other people in your situation and compare war stories, the utter horror at your first explosive nappy, the numerous times you step on a tiny toy left on the floor, the sleepless nights... I could go on, but I won't. Each of these topics have been covered in this book, along with many others. It is well written and rather amusing.

I highly recommend this and can't wait to read the others, in particular, Five Give Up the Booze :) Now that sounds hilarious!

[Simon Evans · Rating 1 out of 5]

I cannot work out what the point of this book is.

It seems to be aiming for the market as the Ladybird for grown-ups series. The difference here is that the Ladybird books are wry and mostly funny.

This is not funny. At all. No laugh-out-loud moments. No chuckles. No sniggers. Not even a smile. And definitely no "hey, listen to this, it hilarious" bits to read out loud to friends and family.

The story (such as it is) sees the four – now adult – human members of the Famous Five given charge of a cousin's baby daughter. The reason being that the cousin and his wife have both been arrested and the baby is being placed with next-of-kin.

The ups and downs of those new to parenting are documented through the flimsy 90-odd pages in a way that makes Sunday-supplement columnists seem like literary heavyweights.

The only good thing about this book is the inclusion of some of the original Eileen Soper illustrations. There was a reason I picked up my (mint, almost unread, condition) copy for a quid in a charity shop. It will be heading back there shortly.

[John Naylor · Rating 1 out of 5]

I had read one previous book in this series that I didn't enjoy. This was slightly better.

Only slightly. I actually laughed once during this book.

I feel the problem I have with these books is the fact they are parodies and so the characters are too. They don't need to be and it would help if they were not. I am sure that new parents will recognise many things in this book but they just felt forced into the story.

I didn't feel the words flow when reading this book at all. I often had to stop and reread passages which seemed to lack a link to the previous paragraphs. I didn't enjoy the read. If I was to parody Enid Blyton I would have a different approach to it. I also wouldn't choose to parody her works due to books like this.

Not a book suited to this reader at all and one that only gets 1 star as I cannot give 0 stars.

[Hazel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Any British child of my generation was brought up reading the childrens books about the Famous Five by Enid Blyton. So, on a recent trip back to the UK when I saw that there were adult, parody versions of them, I just had to have them. Even better I found 2 in a local Leicestershire charity shop so started with those. They kept the "voice" of Enid Blyton and the original 5 characters (although quite how Timmy the dog is still alive after all those years!), while telling laugh out lot version of "adulting". Very funny, quick read.

[Rebecca B · Rating 3 out of 5]

This novelty book had more of a storyline than I was expecting, but sadly fewer laughs. The adult Julian, Anne, Dick and George have foiled a plot by their cousin Rupert and had him sent to jail - only to become legal guardian to Rupert's baby daughter who they knew nothing of. I was surprised to find some truly tender moments but much of the story was fairly predictable, all the usual tropes about modern parenting that you'll find in any number of TV shows/magazine columns/internet memes. An enjoyable, light-hearted read but not as funny as I was hoping for.

[L C · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought the book set for a giggle over the Christmas holidays with family. This is my favorite so far. They are written in the style of the famous five books, but from a grown up view of their experiences, with added humour and sarcasm. If you were a fan of the childhood books and wish to know how Anne, Julian, Dick, George and Timmy the dog cope as adults, then these could be for you. They are a very easy read with larger font print and include drawings. I found them nostalgically amusing, even laughing out loud at times.

[mia · Rating 4 out of 5]

i saw it while i was thrifting for books and thought it was just a short normal family book of five but it wasnt. It was the famous 5 ( i pretended it was daisy jones and the six pls ignore ) and honestly it was short i do wish it was a little longer bc i wanna see more of being raised by 5 famous teenagers (?) but yeah ik i shouldnt be fussing much over a 100 paged book but yeah i just like the famous five parenting idea HDHS

[Virginia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious! As a kid I was a big fan of the original books. Now I'm a parent of a baby who is the same age as the one in the book. So this was the perfect match! If you're not a parent, perhaps it may be hard to relate to the situations described. If you don't know the characters from before I don't think it is an issue. It's just a nice plus if you do :)

[Annette McIntyre · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Famous Five are all grown up now and still up to their old thing of stopping criminals. The latest criminal they've stopped is their cousin Rupert. And it turns out that Rupert and his wife have a baby and Julian, Dick, Anne, George and Timmy the Dog have to look after her.

This book is a hilarious and accurate look at what it is like to be a parent.