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725 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1977
‘It is death which speaks through my lips; as a medical student, you’ll get used to death of the common or garden variety. As Claude Bernard said: La vie, c’est la mort. Personally, however, I prefer the attitude of the Divine Marquis who considered death to be one of the most precious laws of nature. Look,’ said Palinuro, showing me a toy boat, ‘this was the first boat, and the last, that my father built for me. Which leads me on to the thought that the surgeon, my friend, in the operating theatre surrounded by a team of nurses dressed in green and white, is the captain of a ship sailing through a sea of blood and lymph, through cystotomies and trepanations, between Scylla and Charybdis, his face bronzed by the lamps of the operating theatre! To port…’
‘There‘s an anaesthetist, doctor…’
‘To starboard…’
‘There’s a lymphosarcoma, doctor!’
And the best proof that our love was infinite was our room, faithfully reflecting our love. And the best proof that our room was infinite was a crystal egg we had on the windowsill which faithfully reflected our room. This egg was colourless and transparent, as big as an ostrich egg and spent its time, every morning, reproducing the view upside down: mountains hung from the ceiling, the ceiling was a lake and when the sun rose in the world outside, in our little crystal world the evening set: the sun sank over the horizon, round, luminous and orange as a giant yolk sinking into a sea of collyrium. And in the afternoon the opposite happened: when the sun descended in the sky outside and the stars sprinkled the boats’ masts, in our sky the dawn was breaking. And so it was that, like the chocolate emperor who spoke in German to his horses, we could say that over our kingdom, over our little room in Holy Sunday Square, in which our bed was America, our kitchen Europe and the bath-tub Oceania, the sun never set. It was the golden egg floating in the primordial waters in which Brahma was born: the egg in the shape of Father Mersenne’s Great Lyre of the Universe; the egg hanging over the head of Piero della Francesco’s Madonna dell’uouo. This was the egg that if you shut one eye and placed it in front of the other, you contemplated the universe and its surroundings as Borges contemplated the world in El Aleph or as Faust and Vasco da Gama, from the peak of Paradise, contemplated the Ptolemaic orb.
“Hacíamos el amor compulsivamente. Lo hacíamos deliberadamente. Lo hacíamos espontáneamente. Pero sobre todo, hacíamos el amor diariamente. O en otras palabras, los lunes, los martes y los miércoles, hacíamos el amor invariablemente. Los jueves, los viernes y los sábados, hacíamos el amor igualmente. Por últimos los domingos hacíamos el amor religiosamente. O bien hacíamos el amor por compatibilidad de caracteres, por favor, por supuesto, por teléfono, de primera intención y en última instancia, por no dejar y por si acaso, como primera medida y como último recurso. Hicimos también el amor por ósmosis y por simbiosis: a eso le llamábamos hacer el amor científicamente. Pero también hicimos el amor yo a ella y ella a mí: es decir, recíprocamente. Y cuando ella se quedaba a la mitad de un orgasmo y yo, con el miembro convertido en un músculo fláccido no podía llenarla, entonces hacíamos el amor lastimosamente. Lo cual no tiene nada que ver con las veces en que yo me imaginaba que no iba a poder, y no podía, y ella pensaba que no iba a sentir, y no sentía, o bien estábamos tan cansados y tan preocupados que ninguno de los dos alcanzaba el orgasmo. Decíamos, entonces, que habíamos hecho el amor aproximadamente. O bien Estefanía le daba por recordar las ardilla que el tío Esteban le trajo de Wisconsin y que daban vueltas como locas en sus jaulas olorosas a creolina, y yo por mi parte recordaba la sala de la casa de los abuelos, con sus sillas vienesas y sus macetas de rosasté esperando la eclosión de las cuatro de la tarde, y así era como hacíamos el amor nostálgicamente, viniéndonos mientras nos íbamos tras viejos recuerdos. Muchas veces hicimos el amor contra natura, a favor de natura, ignorando a natura. O de noche con la luz encendida, mientras los zancudos ejecutaban una danza cenital alrededor del foco. O de día con los ojos cerrados. O con el cuerpo limpio y la conciencia sucia. O viceversa. Contentos, felices, dolientes, amargados. Con remordimientos y sin sentido. Con sueño y con frío. Y cuando estábamos conscientes de lo absurdo de la vida, y de que un día nos olvidaríamos el uno del otro, entonces hacíamos el amor inútilmente. Para envidia de nuestros amigos y enemigos, hacíamos el amor ilimitadamente, magistralmente, legendariamente. Para honra de nuestros padres, hacíamos el amor moralmente. Para escándalo de la sociedad, hacíamos el amor ilegalmente. Para alegría de los psiquiatras, hacíamos el amor sintomáticamente. Y, sobre todo, hacíamos el amor físicamente. También lo hicimos de pie y cantando, de rodillas y rezando, acostados y soñando. Y sobre todo, y por simple razón de que yo lo quería así y ella también, hacíamos el amor voluntariamente."
"...and I vowed that the book which I would write someday would be as sickly, fragile and defective as the human organism and also, if possible (which it isn't), equally intricate and magnificent."

But, on her nose and cheeks, my cousin also had archipelagos of freckles which might have been caused by the impact of bubbles of champagne and which, maintained Uncle Esteban - because he adored them and because he adored Estefania and drank her tears from a thimble of ivory - added sparkle to her fizziognomy. And also on her shoulders, those shoulders like blue dunes, caressed by scorching Levantine winds, and from which grew, like scattered vegetation from desert sand, single golden hairs tasting of apricot. And when my cousin sunbathed, whether in Acupulco, in the YMCA or in Walter’s house in Cuernavaca where she lay naked on the lawn framed in passion flowers and plumbago, her freckles appeared to emigrate from her shoulders and congregate on her back, forming adventitious continents like shadows of butterflies hovering with outspread wings a few centimetres from her skin.Oh yeah, there's a shit-ton on incest as well.
Palinuro's was the power to reinvent life and family cosmogonies and crystallize them into a world held up, here and there, with pins: here to the remembrance of a Dutch still-life which memory had forgotten in a pantry; there, to the perpetuation of a coded phrase fertilized by the fortuitous presence of an aster plant, on one of the many occasions he went with Estefania to Walter's house in Cuernavaca. Palinuro never forgot the sight of those flowers, clustered in candyfloss corymbs of magenta, against a backdrop of stars which seemed to make up for the distance between the name of the plant and its objective: Aldebaran, the Pleiades, Sagittarius. Neither did he ever forget that he had to describe to his cousin the roundness and the itinerary of the stars because Estefania was short-sighted and the twinkling orbs were drowned in the vitreous humours of her eyes before reaching her own shining spheres. Palinuro's was also the privilege of embracing in memory the joint existence with a single square centimeter of a river about to freeze and estival grass, of the falling of a dove's wing in the orange marmalade forgotten on the porch . . .
And in the last of the rooms was Estefania, alone and mad. It was an immense chamber, with walls, ceilings, and floors covered in immaculate white mosaics. Flourens' doves, deprived of their cerebella, flew headlong into the mosaics and fell into the jars of methyl orange and cut their throats as, in their clumsy flight, they broke test tubes of Bohemian glass and flasks of Jena glass. Drops of red blood and orange methyl dripped into agate mortars and white sinks corroded by nitric acid, as Estefania's tears trickled down the long glass pipettes, leaving a drop of transparency here and there, filtering through a silk sieve, leaving a drop of blue here and there, and overflowed from chrome crucibles. Only much later, when Estefania forgot about Flourens' doves and all her animals killed and tortured in the name of science, not till then did her tears evaporate and each turn into a tiny, violet, butterfly-shaped flame, the color of a flame of potassium and hydrogen.
Now and again, you could hear the spores of a gelatinous conversation, and I continued to climb the endless stairs of the old colonial building of red foam, submerged in the darkness of a brew of seaweed, between greenish and opaline, with hints of apple camphor and rotten egg yolks, towards the immense organ of burning wind composed of the retorts of the alchemic cathedral belonging to Palinuro, whom I was about to meet, as the concierge told me, around the corner of a cornice or in the drainpipe of shadow which acquired, suddenly, a tempestuous translucency. And so it was; I swear I will never forget it: beneath that light of oily cellophane, in the middle of the room and some way from the window which looked out over the street and the afternoon, was Palinuro, naked from the waist down and from the waist up, prescribing for himself a sit-down bath in an aluminum tub full of vinegar.
Aunque decir atrás, claro, sólo es un decir: no es que la esencia de las cosas esté atrás ni en ninguna parte; ni abajo, ni adentro, ni alrededor. Todas esas palabras no nos sirven para designar algo que no está ni en el espacio ni en el tiempo, porque espacio y tiempo son también palabras. ¿Y quién ha visto jamás a una palabra redonda? ¿quién ha visto una sílaba color de rosa? ¿quién ha visto nunca una frase correr por las calles gritando como loca? ¿Quién ha visto nunca a un párrafo gordo y oloroso a tabaco Príncipe Alberto sentarse en la banca de un parque para leer el periódico? ¿quién ha visto jamás a una ilusión vestida de encajes morados, o a un poema que revienta como un estornudo en el plexo solar y lanza la sangre a las alturas?