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The Five Elements: Understand Yourself and Enhance Your Relationships with the Wisdom of the World's Oldest Personality Type System

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"The Five Elements brings the wisdom of an ancient healing system to the modern reader. Many people today are interested in knowing themselves better, as evidenced by the popularity of personality tests online and in magazines. They want to know the reason behind their responses to situations. In this book, Dondi Dahlin shows us that we are all born with individual rhythms that go beyond the influence of our genes and upbringing. The five elements originated in ancient Chinese medicine over 2,000 years ago--when scholars theorized that the universe is composed of five water, wood, fire, earth, and metal. Understanding these elements helps us stay in balance physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. By explaining the efficacy of wood, the depth of water, the joy of fire, the compassion of earth, and the wisdom of metal, this book helps people understand themselves and form lasting connections to others, answering the age-old question of why we do what we do"--

320 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 27, 2016

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Dondi Dahlin

6 books9 followers

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
Profile Image for Laura .
445 reviews223 followers
May 19, 2023
I read nearly all of this - minus the "Fire" chapter. I watched a video advertised on FB and the book offered very little extra information - I would say primarily Dondi Dahlin's encounters with "Famous" people - mostly Americans but one notable outsider - Omar Sharif. His solicitous attitude to her career of belly-dancing she explained as - he is a Wood with Earth elements. Personally I would have interpreted it as an Arabic male viewing a "rich" American woman having to earn her keep by rather dubious means - I think I would be correct in saying that belly-dancers were originally street-performers, gypsies, 'women-of-the-night'... I had to laugh at this cross-cultural misunderstanding.
I think Mr Sharif said, - 'she was too thin, should eat more; and take good care of herself'.
Profile Image for Lianne Downey.
Author 5 books34 followers
February 5, 2017
For years I've been struggling with the notion that I am supposed to be, in the ancient Chinese “five element” system, an Earth element (or rhythm) person. This was indicated by a quick muscle test method that should have worked.

I hated the idea. I kicked and screamed over it. How could I be?? But by others I was convinced. Still, I don't have children and never wanted them: I'm not the "earth mother" type that's sometimes described for Earth element people, but I do like to encourage people to become their best selves through my books and healing practices. Is that nurturing? And I have suffered from uterine fibroids, a typical Earth rhythm ailment, making me (when younger, before they shrank a bit) look like a Mother Goddess statue from antiquity, as one young man pointed out. So I've been living under this idea ever since, reluctantly.

Well, this book has liberated me!! I am ecstatic! The thorough descriptions helped, but more importantly, the comprehensive self-tests, questionnaires, and checklists nailed it. I took the tests, read the descriptions, and was able to definitively declare that my rhythm--my true, happy, quirky self--moves first and primarily in the flow of Water, and shockingly next with the stomping confidence of WOOD! (secondary rhythm), followed by the enthusiastic combustion of Fire (tertiary or third rhythm), with only the occasional drift into the deep compassion of Earth nurturing (fourth).

I'm still reading and absorbing the wonderful stories from the author's colorful life as belly dancer, actress, mother, and daughter of a world-famous healer (Donna Eden). And I haven't yet made my way to the rich storehouse of info about children's rhythms. But I now know why I have always walked like a Wood (not an Egyptian).

I thought I simply learned that from my mother, who loved to start wordy, shouting fights. She was the Wood, thought I, trying to force myself into the "Earth" mold years ago. (That takes on new meaning -- earth mold -- but that is indeed how it felt to put myself into the wrong psychological box, moldy!!) I am not one who backs down easily, and I will always speak up for my rights, or others'. It's odd because I love to dance, and my kinds of dancing are graceful, not stomping. But moving off the dance floor? Stomp, stomp, stomp. Haha! Wow, even my secondary element explains so much about who I am. I'm so grateful to this book!

Understanding that Water is my primary way of relating to and moving in the world has answered so many other questions and dilemmas for me. I feel like someone opened my cage and said, "Yes! Be yourself! It is a very legitimate way to be! You are not crazy! You simply move through life in a way that others may not."

Second to understanding myself is the breaking light of "Ah ha!" regarding friends and family. "No wonder!!" I keep exclaiming. I will be forever grateful to Dondi Dahlin for sharing her own stories of discovery and for completing the painstaking work to accurately depict the Five Elements of ancient tradition. And to come up with self-tests that have proven, in my experience, far more effective than taking someone else's word for it.

If you love to discover what makes your own heart tick, you'll love this book!
Profile Image for Caroline Hurry.
Author 17 books66 followers
October 31, 2021
Loving the concepts contained within - wish I had discovered this book years ago!! Dondi is not just a brilliant author with a fun accessible way of getting her wisdom across, she is also a brilliant actress who will have you in stitches of laughter!
Profile Image for Danielle Shroyer.
Author 4 books33 followers
September 2, 2017
I did not love this book. Partly it just wasn't what I was looking for, which was a more philosophical overview of the five elements. This is much more emotional in tone and filled with stories of famous people she knows, which felt a little name-droppy and contrived. If you're looking to understand the five elements there are better options for you that are less "Buzzfeed personality test" in style.
Profile Image for Diane.
398 reviews
March 18, 2017
Enjoyed going through this book. Interesting concepts.
Profile Image for Cindy.
238 reviews8 followers
September 1, 2023
What a fantastic book! I immensely enjoyed reading the book and analyzing myself along with everyone else I know, trying to figure out who is a metal, earth, fire, water and wood. It had been explained to be that only a Five Elements acupuncturist can truly diagnose your element. But that didn’t stop me from believing that I am an Earth element with a strong Water secondary. It’s gratifying to read that there are other people like me, especially when I feel misunderstood and alone. Just knowing that others can’t seem to say no to sweets, take forever to reach a decision and focus on all that they don’t have instead of what they do have…it just helps me to try and get more balanced instead of trying to change my stripes. God knows I’ve tried to be goal oriented, driven, neat and tidy. But when I read that that’s the strength of other elements, not my element, it helps me to have some compassion for myself. It helps just to feel understood. Wonderful book. 10 out of 10.
Profile Image for Gold Dust.
320 reviews
August 26, 2023
About the personality type system from ancient Chinese medical texts (3). We each contain all five elements. A person can be one element in public and another one in private (149, 228). “The element that dominates at a particular moment in time, while always reflecting your basic nature, may be strongly influenced in time, while always reflecting your basic nature, may be strongly influenced by the situation or by where you are in your life cycle” (xii). “Having more than one strong element makes us diverse and well rounded” (228). Professor J. R. Worsley taught that every person is born with an imbalance of elements, which causes illness (7).

I liked that the book talked about how the types would behave as children too (245).

The author recommends almost all the same things to each type: swimming, stretching, dancing, walking, breathing, closing eyes, acupressure, and eden energy medicine.

Summary, including correlations with other personality types according to me:

Water
Season: winter
MBTI: INFP
Enneagram: 4
Child Whisperer type: 2
Greek zodiac: Scorpio
Animal: turtle
Stress response: internalize, isolate
Emotion: fear
Organs: kidney (yin) & bladder (yang)
Body type: soft, chubby, delicate
Description: Slow, mental, emotional, creative, shy, love to eat. “They live in a conundrum: They don’t want anyone knowing who they really are, and yet they really want people to understand them” (250).
There are two water types described - an innocent, giggling baby (23) and a deep, tormented, emotional, introverted philosopher (21). IMO the baby is not like the second water type at all, and should not be described as a water type. The innocent baby is more like a fire type. But the reason they make the baby be a water type is because water is supposed to be the beginning of the cycle, and fire naturally occurs in summer, which is mid-cycle. The Greek system makes more sense—starting the zodiac with fiery Aries. And the order of the Greek elements being fire, earth, air, water makes sense too—fire is the most immature, earth is more mature but not very smart, air is smart but not wise, and water is wise.

Wood
Season: spring
MBTI: ENTJ
Enneagram: 8, 1
Child Whisperer type: 3
Greek zodiac: Aries
Animal: bulldog
Stress response: blame, accuse
Emotion: anger
Organs: liver (yin), gallbladder (yang)
Body type: stocky, solid, strong, broad shoulders. Prone to arthritis, headaches, numbness, muscle spasms, vision problems, and autoimmune diseases.
Advice: close your eyes, move, stretch, soften your words, walk fast, martial arts, avoid alcohol, say “I’m feeling hurt” instead of “You made me angry.”
Description: fearless, sees the big picture, creates change, strong, logical, independent, practical, productive, opinionated, honest, efficient, perfectionist, straightforward, successful, impatient, controlling, ambitious, strategic, workaholics, thrive under pressure, speak their minds. “The path of growth for a Wood is to learn to show leadership without being authoritarian and to be competent without being arrogant” (73). The books says not to tell a Wood, “It wasn’t very good, but you’ll do better next time.” Instead say, “It was good, and I know you’ll do even better next time, because I know how hard you work” (94). Seems contradictory to me, to sugarcoat the truth, when Woods are supposed to value honesty and straightforwardness.

Fire
Season: summer
MBTI: ENFP, ESFP
Enneagram: 7
Child Whisperer type: 1
Greek zodiac: Leo
Animal: dolphin, monkey, puppy
Stress response: panic
Emotion: joy
Organs: heart & pericardium (yin), small intestine & triple warmer (yang)
Body type: slim, athletic, fit, curly/frizzy/flyaway hair
Description: charismatic, cheerful, impulsive, fun-loving, loud, social, easily distracted.

Earth
Season: solstices and equinoxes
MBTI: ISFJ
Enneagram: 2
Child Whisperer type: 2
Greek zodiac: Cancer
Animal: golden retriever dog, deer, cow
Stress response: worry, enable
Emotion: worry
Organs: stomach (yang), spleen (yin)
Body type: round, fleshy, soft, slow
Description: loving, loyal, friendly, kind, unrushed, flowing, good workers, generous, helpful, hoarders.
I don’t like how earth is not really given a season. It makes more sense to me to have earth be in spring time. Earths are motherly, and animals tend to give birth to new babies in spring. In general, I’m more a fan of the more common element system of four types: fire (assertive), earth (practical introvert), air (intellectual), and water (emotional). The reason being because sun, soil, oxygen, and water are the ingredients for life. Wood is not; it is a life form born of those other elements (and produces oxygen but breathes a different air: carbon dioxide). As for metals, there are many different kinds of metals, but none of them are required for life. Also, having only four elements instead of five makes more sense for correlating them with the seasons.

Metal
Season: autumn
MBTI: INTJ, INFJ
Enneagram: 5, 9
Child Whisperer type: 4
Greek zodiac: Virgo, Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces
Animal: cat, giraffe
Stress response: detach, become aloof
Emotion: grief
Organs: lungs (yin), large intestine (yang)
Body type: tall, angular, high cheekbones
Description: They dislike small talk (198). Metals put their work/responsibilities over their sadness, while Waters don’t (187). Sometimes the book describes Metals as the aloof, practical, stiff, awkward, systematic intellectual holding others to high standards (INTJ), and sometimes it describes them as the peaceful, graceful, smooth walking people seeking enlightenment (INFJ). IMO, these two types should be given separate category names just as they are in Enneagram; the enlightenment-seeking person shouldn’t be lumped in with Metals, but rather be a type of Earth. Earths are giving and loving, which is more like the enlightened person. Metals are hard and rigid in their thinking, not compassionate or generous.
The following refers to the intellectual Metal, not the enlightenment-seeking one: “The Western school system was created by Horace Mann and based on the German system. In 1806, after Prussia (the north German kingdom centered on Berlin) was defeated by Napoleon, its leaders decided that they had lost because soldiers had been thinking for themselves instead of following orders. Germans wanted to ensure that this would never happen again, so they created a strict eight-year system that taught duty, discipline, respect for authority, and obligation to follow orders. Kids were now told what to learn, what to think, and how long to think about it. By 1900, most countries in the Western world had adopted this system, which is very Metal (and Wood) and still reigns as the model for public schooling today. Metals are often mechanical in the way they speak” (188-189).

Like Enneagram theory has lines for integration and disintegration, the five elements system believes certain types support other types, and certain types are not good matches for each other. The support direction goes in season order (230-232): water supports wood, wood supports fire, etc. The wrong types for each other go in season order but skips one (233-235): water controls fire, fire controls metal, etc. Because I don’t agree with the arbitrarily assigned order of the elements, I don’t agree with this support/control system. In general, I think people of the same element/personality will get along best. The only exception might be earth which gets along with everyone and doesn’t ask for much in return; everyone wants a partner who is giving and helpful.

Each of the five elements has a yin or yang version of it. Yin = introverted, soft, gentle, flowing, yielding, passive, diffused, cold, wet, and feminine. Yang is extraverted, fast, hard, solid, focused, sharp, hot, dry, aggressive, and masculine (239). Each of the elements also has a time of day when their main organ is supposedly most active (239-243), which I would need science to believe.

Interesting:

The foreword was written by the author’s mother. She said that she had two daughters from the same father and were even born on the same day (and therefore had the same zodiac sign) (ix-x)! And yet they had very different personalities.

“Mao’s desire for ultimate power over his people seems to be the reason why he collapsed the vast country’s five time zones into one (which is a huge problem today), all because he wanted people to eat their rice at the same time” (9). Wow. Those commies sure take equality to an extreme. Mao also got rid of feng shui because he was worried about it making people wealthy and powerful (9).

The author points out how efficiency can be considered impatience (95). That’s an interesting way of looking at it. J types are efficient/impatient, and P types are inefficient/patient.

“I had always been friends with both Jews and Arabs and I didn’t understand the faux pas I was making by choosing an Israeli singer to honor an Arab” (145). Funny how such things are just called cultural “faux pas,” but if it were to happen in America—it being taboo to choose a black singer to honor a white person—it’d just be called racist. People forgive racism when it’s some other culture doing it. I can’t stand the double standard.

“For many years, Ben & Jerry’s had a policy that no employee’s rate of pay should exceed five times that of entry-level employees” (148). That’s my idea in practice! Wonderful!

Robin Williams required that “for every single event or film he did, the company hiring him also had to hire a certain number of homeless people and put them to work” (150). Awesome!

The author suggests that how people behave under stress may be the biggest reason for breakups and divorce (1). Again, I think it’s just differences in general.
Profile Image for Nadia.
466 reviews60 followers
January 17, 2018
This was an exceptional book from which I learnt a lot! Dondi did a superb job of presenting unexplored information in a relatable manner & an adroit format. This is knowledge which should be taught at an early age in order to enable individuals to have clarity about who they are. For myself, this has added another dimension of personal enlightenment along with psychological perception and astrological wisdom bringing the complexity of my persona into a resonant light. If you are a seeker of personal wisdom and desire a depth of discernment with others then this is a MUST READ!
2 reviews4 followers
November 17, 2019
I had no knowledge of the five elements in this personality system before picking up the book. After reading the book i already feel as though i have a great grasp on the element's, which has helped me understand why people act certain ways that i couldn't understand before. I Recommend this book or philosophy to literally anyone, it is a great eye-opener to seeing differences in people and that we are imperfect in a perfect way sometimes.
22 reviews
January 16, 2020
This is probably my all-time favorite reference book. I really like how it is written. I have done the quiz with so many people and we have all learned so much about ourselves as a result. This book is one that I keep pulling off the shelf and referencing. Since I read it in November, I have given 13+ copies to friends and family :)
Profile Image for Deborah.
27 reviews
May 10, 2018
I hope to get more insights at the workshop. I took the quizes for determining what elements I had. What surprised me was how much metal.
2 reviews
October 14, 2019
A must read book for all those who wants to know why we behave the way we behave.
Profile Image for Kelly.
410 reviews31 followers
June 2, 2023
I was reluctant to pick up this book because of the reviews saying that she name drops a lot but I realized that her descriptions about the celebrities are not in vain. She paints an impression of each element and by giving us celebrity names (people who we all know and can look up if we don’t know), we gain greater access to the vibe she’s talking about.

When it comes to these five elemental personalities, I think it’s about getting a feel for the energy for each type rather than being too strict or mathematical about it (which some of the reviewers seem to want to do…but they’re probably Wood-Metal types) and I think she does a great job of illustrating each energy.

I will let these concepts marinate and try to find real life examples of these elements and I will refer back to the book later.

PS: My husband is a total wood type and we are currently on a sabbatical because he’s totally burnt out from his job. He’s having a tough time with this sabbatical though because he doesn’t quite understand how to rest. Had it not been for this book, I would’ve assumed that his REAL issues lie elsewhere and that he’s just complaining to complain but now I know that wood types really do have a hard time chilling out (a nearly impossible concept for me, a primary Water). Had it not been for this book I would probably have much less understanding for his predicament.
Profile Image for Heidi.
404 reviews3 followers
March 7, 2021
I loved to see which elements are most prominent in my personality (Wood, Water, and Earth). Wood was the clear front runner though Water and Earth were 2 points from one another so they are both almost equally my secondary elements.
I have learned a lot....and the best thing about this: it has led me to more personality-ish tests. I took about 10 more tests and now I am reading a little more throughly about my Dosha (Vita). Darn near everything concerning the tests I have taken have led me to some significant clues about my authentic self and they have provided suggestions to practice in order to become more balanced and happy.
Profile Image for Kristen.
168 reviews3 followers
June 27, 2017
This is a nice introduction to the Chinese Five Elements System. It is interesting to consider the elemental influence on our personalities and perspectives. As is my usual result, I fit into no category and all categories - getting almost the same score in every element. I would have loved a chapter on that situation, but clearly I'm an oddball that way. I will probably go through the book again just to get a little deeper understanding of the whole system and using the element-based viewpoint to understand others more clearly.
Profile Image for Chaitanya.
11 reviews
November 20, 2021
In The Five Elements, Dondi manages to introduce us to the core element of Chinese medicine in a way that is both insightful and transformational. She explores each element in great detail following a paused and methodical style that is the result of both her Wood and Water elements playing together. You will get to know yourself and those who surround you more deeply and develop compassion and understanding for them and yourself.

A must-read for anyone who wishes to understand themselves better and be on top of their game.
Profile Image for Kira Stahly.
228 reviews2 followers
June 17, 2021
I found this book interesting and insightful! I’m not quite sure why we are not taught more about this in achool or just in general. I highly doubt many people know their sign which after reading this book, I found to be very helpful. Dahlin included so much information about personality, medicines that would be helpful, careers, etc. definitely recommend everyone read this if they’re interested in learning more about themselves (and others!)
15 reviews1 follower
July 31, 2021
Personalities as elements make sense

I found this book to be very interesting. A lot of great information. I hope that Dondi writes more on this topic, specifically about what element imbalances might look like in each element and also what it'll look like with the secondary elements (or even more than one primary or more than one secondary). I'm looking forward to her Five Elements class and hope I'll learn more there.
1 review
October 25, 2022
I am currently working on this book, I am enjoying it so far. I believe this writer is really a good writer and I enjoy reading this book because it is a practical thesis about the four corners i.e. (metal, fire, water and earth). Science has always intrigued me greatly since I was a little girl. I love to read new literature and novels but mostly philosophy. This book is worth reading if you are looking for a little informative distraction and I hope you enjoy. - Cheyenne s Garcia
Profile Image for Jeffrey Ning.
251 reviews4 followers
November 10, 2020
Descriptive knowledge of the five elements that may accelerate your learning of BaZi and Traditional Chinese Medicine.

Use of graphical presentation or visualisation to reinforce the concepts or definitions is brilliant. Chuckled when reading them.

Good addition to your personal library of metaphysics collection.
Profile Image for Li Or.
185 reviews21 followers
July 13, 2023
A fantastic introduction to personality types according to the Five Elements theory of Chinese Medicine. It genuinely opened my eyes to understanding people in my life whose behaviour I had a tough time understanding until now. (eg Even if honesty is extremely important to you (if you're a Wood!) you probably shouldn't be quick to reveal your weaknesses and vulnerabilities to a Metal because they may judge you as not being up to their high standards and will want nothing to do with you after that! Or, don't take it personally if a Water doesn't volunteer to share everything with you even if you share everything with them - they tend to be private people by nature, it's not personal.)

This is the kind of book that enriches your life because you'll be able to recognise element traits in every person you come across in the future. This should help you understand people better, understand how to approach them, and read between the lines of their responses and behaviours so that you'll be able to communicate happily & peacefully, avoid misunderstandings and work better together.
4 reviews
December 28, 2019
Decent review for me, a bit basic but I am TCM professional so what did I expect? I still learnt things but did not need a lot of it. That's not the fault of the book.
Profile Image for Jill.
12 reviews
June 7, 2024
Interesting topic that was explained in a concise and easy way.
Profile Image for Maria.
7 reviews
September 18, 2024
Some really helpful information peppered in with lots of self praise and celebrity fan girling. If all that was taken out, the chapters would be half the length and super helpful.
Profile Image for MUHAMMED SUHAIL.
35 reviews
February 28, 2025
Dondi Dahlin’s The Five Elements: Understand Yourself and Enhance Your Relationships with the Wisdom of the World's Oldest Personality Type System is a captivating journey into the ancient wisdom of personality and interpersonal dynamics. Rooted in the timeless philosophy of the five elements—wood, fire, earth, metal, and water—this book offers a refreshing perspective on understanding ourselves and the people around us.

Dahlin artfully breaks down each element, revealing how these forces shape our character, behavior, and relationships. The narrative is both insightful and practical, guiding readers through self-assessments and real-life applications. Whether you’re curious about why you respond to stress in certain ways or eager to enhance your connections with loved ones, the book provides a roadmap to self-awareness and emotional harmony.

One of the standout aspects of this work is its accessible yet profound approach. Dahlin manages to balance scholarly insights with everyday language, making complex concepts both engaging and easy to grasp. The detailed descriptions of each element not only illuminate our inner workings but also serve as a tool for personal growth and better communication.

Overall, The Five Elements is an inspiring read that blends ancient philosophy with modern self-help techniques. It encourages introspection and offers practical advice to improve relationships, making it a valuable addition to anyone’s personal development library.
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