On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety

by Andrea Petersen

A celebrated science and health reporter offers a wry, bracingly honest account of living with anxiety

A racing heart. Difficulty breathing. Overwhelming dread. Andrea Petersen was first diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at the age of twenty, but she later realized that she had been experiencing panic attacks since childhood. With time her symptoms multiplied. She agonized over every odd physical sensation. She developed fears of driving on highways, going to movie theaters, even licking envelopes. Although having a name for her condition was an enormous relief, it was only the beginning of a journey to understand and master it—one that took her from psychiatrists’ offices to yoga retreats to the Appalachian Trail.

Woven into Petersen’s personal story is a fascinating look at the biology of anxiety and the groundbreaking research that might point the way to new treatments. She compares psychoactive drugs to non-drug treatments, including biofeedback and exposure therapy. And she explores the role that genetics and the environment play in mental illness, visiting top neuroscientists and tracing her family history—from her grandmother, who, plagued by paranoia, once tried to burn down her own house, to her young daughter, in whom Petersen sees shades of herself.

Brave and empowering, this is essential reading for anyone who knows what it means to live on edge.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Mental Health, Psychology, Self Help, Health, Science

320 pages, Hardcover

First published May 16, 2017

Reviews

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

One Edge: A Journey through Anxiety by Andrea Peterson is a 2017 Crown publication.

As a long -time sufferer from panic/anxiety disorder, this book truly resonated with me.
This book chronicles the author’s own personal journey with the disorder, but also offers some insight into why people develop anxiety, including a look at her family history and genetics.

Most of the key areas one might expect are covered here, such as treatment, types of anxiety, phobias, isolation, predisposition, symptoms and most importantly, how to cope and live with the disorder without completely withdrawing from the world.

Her personal story is mixed in with medical and scientific facts and research, some of which sailed over my head, although I am interested in the results, it was mind numbing in a few places and I zoned out.

But, for the most part, I understood where the author was coming from and my own behavior mimicked hers on many occasions.

Her story is frank, honest, and practical, and I took inspiration from her as she fights daily with this debilitating disorder and mostly wins out in the end. Fear is the main theme and I completely agree. The anticipation of anxiety is the most difficult part to gain control of.



Overall, I think this is an insightful, knowledgeable look at living with anxiety, that anyone who has been diagnosed with the malady will relate to, sympathize with and learn from. Not only that, if you have a friend or a family member with an anxiety disorder, this book will give you valuable insight and information so you can understand how better to support them.

There is no cure for anxiety, but this book does offer understanding and advice, along with the hope of a medical or scientific breakthrough someday, for future generations. In the meantime, fighting fear and anxiety is a battle we must fight daily with a determination to keep it from affecting or diminishing our quality of life.


4 stars

[Petra · Rating 4 out of 5]

On Edge is partly a memoir and partly a very comprehensive research paper into anxiety disorders. Andrea Petersen, a health, psychology and neuroscience reporter for the Wall Street Journal, combines her own experience of living with anxiety with a deep dive into research that explores the disorder. As you would expect due to Ms Petersen's profession, the book is extremely well researched and well written. In fact, I think it deserves a place on the reading lists of any mental health courses out there. On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety explores the history of the disorder, the history of diagnosis and treatment, the influence of genetics and what we can learn from the advances in neuroimaging. It looks at various treatment suggestions (from CBT and ACT to meditation and yoga etc.) including information on drugs. It deals with parenting and anxiety in children and young people. Petersen's research includes studies from all around the world. The attention to detail is quite impressive but the sometimes heavy research focus might not make this overly user-friendly for everybody. It took me quite a while to get through the book; the main reason being that it sometimes felt like reading for work/study rather than leisure reading. There is a lot of information to process.
But then there is Andrea Petersen's autobiographical story, which is touching, very interesting, and also brave. Ms Petersen doesn't shy away from looking at the effect her anxiety has had on past relationships or her family's history of mental health issues.
Overall, highly recommended reading if you suffer from anxiety yourself, know somebody who does and want to find out more about it, or even if you're generally interested in the subject. There is a lot of useful information, but beware if you're not used to research terminology some of this requires concentration and patience but it's worthwhile investing the time.
I received an ARC via NetGalley.

[Erin Clemence · Rating 4 out of 5]

Andrea Petersen is a well-educated, well-spoken woman who writes for the Wall Street Journal. She also has a relatively happy and healthy relationship with her husband, and their young daughter. Alternatively, though, she also has severe debilitating anxiety (in various forms, including panic disorder and hypochondria).
“On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety” is her real-life memoir, and it shines a very realistic view on anxiety disorders of all kinds. Not only does Petersen share her own experiences, but she also discusses medications, treatments and research (both positive and negative). “On Edge” is not only eye-opening and informative, it is also emotional and touching.
Petersen highlights the scientific aspects of anxiety (as mentioned) including research studies and medications, therapies, and various scientists and researchers she has interacted with in the search for a “cure” for her anxiety. For someone with a degree in psychology, this was interesting (and not entirely new) information for me. However, it can be a bit dry and scientific for a reader without that background. Petersen though, does not spend a lot of time on this part of things (one full chapter, with occasional mentions periodically throughout) as the reader gets more of a chance to experience life in Petersen’s shoes, witnessing firsthand the crippling effects anxiety has had on her career, relationships and life.
For those with anxiety, reading this memoir will help you realize that A) you are not alone and B) it could be worse. It also may provide you with hope for your future, and open your eyes to other treatments options you may not have tried. For those who don’t have anxiety, this memoir will still provide you with information, and may even give you increased empathy for those suffering.
This memoir is honest and real and I enjoyed Petersen’s ability to share her personal struggles so openly. I am normally not a reader of non-fiction, or memoirs, and was quite impressed with the connection I felt to this novel right away. The ending was especially pleasing, as Petersen was able to work and have a happy, healthy life while still battling with anxiety.
Definitely recommended for those who have faced anxiety (or are currently facing it), and I think this novel is especially important for those who love someone with anxiety. The struggles are often private and invisible, and this honest and thought-provoking memoir will hopefully break some of the stigma around mental illness, especially anxiety.

[Stacey Camp · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant read. Review forthcoming.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

“An anxiety disorder is a condition in which you experience frequent, powerful bouts of anxiety that interfere with your life” ~ ADAA

“On Edge” is reporter medical journalist Andrea Petersen’s powerful debut memoir of the challenges of dealing with cycles of severe crippling anxiety that alternated between periods of wellness and unpredictable episodes that led to shattering relapses. The book covers nearly three decades. Patients with a panic disorder wait on an average of 10 years before seeking care from a medical provider, those with conditions related to social phobia wait up to 16 years. There is no cure, or guarantee of receiving appropriate psychological/medical diagnosis and treatment.

While attending college in Ann Harbor at the University of Michigan in 1989, Petersen was “ambushed with fear”. These fears totally overwhelmed her, with profuse sweating, stomach flipping, increased heart rate, breathing shallow and fast, erratic pounding in her ears and visual impairment. Convinced she was having a stroke, heart attack, and/or dying, she spent a great deal of time in her dorm room or on her parents couch barely able to function in daily life. There was no warning of these panic attacks. When she consulted her doctor she had gone from a “silly sorority girl” to a “terrorized shut-in” in a matter of weeks. With multiple trips to doctors, emergency room visits, numerous rounds of tests including EKG’s and CAT scans there were thousands of dollars charged in medical bills.

After Petersen recovered somewhat from a mental breakdown, she toured the 400 acre Mendota Mental Health Institute (1860-) where her grandmother had once been a patient. Petersen recalled her own family heritage and wrote convincingly of the genetic component involved in anxiety disorders. The links and symptoms of anxiety begin in childhood for many patients, though she had good stable upbringing with no neglect or abuse.
Petersen added research from Freud --where his ideologies to diagnose the origin/root cause of anxiety were abandoned, and shifted to relieving symptoms. Dr. Aaron Beck (University of Pennsylvania) invented Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). Administered in 12-15 weekly sessions with homework, Petersen found CBT effective, though relapse rates varied. Comparisons were made between non-drug and drug therapies. Studies and use of psychotropic medications, side effects, concerns for using medication long term, for crisis stabilization, and during pregnancy were really informative.

Petersen clarified that it wouldn’t have been possible for her to graduate from college without the loyalty and support of friends and a steady boyfriend. Sadly, not all of her friends understood, another boyfriend of many years questioned her ability to work and parent a child, eventually ended their relationship. This led Petersen to be totally honest and transparent with potential suitors of her diagnosis, her truthful candor is a solid foundation of her story— and particularly helpful, whether reader’s have anxiety conditions, or not. Planning her life and work around anxiety required Petersen to monitor her health, sleep, diet, and exercise needs carefully. Today she is healthier and confident. Ms. Petersen is a wife and mother of a young daughter, she and her family live in Brooklyn, N.Y. ~With thanks to Crown Publishing via NetGalley for the direct e-copy for the purpose of review.

[Riva Sciuto · Rating 2 out of 5]

While I admire Andrea Petersen for writing such a brave and candid memoir about her lifelong battle with anxiety, I found it way too self-focused. Part memoir, part science, it doesn't fully succeed as either.

She weaves in her own experiences -- somewhat annoyingly -- with scientific research and historical accounts of anxiety as a diagnosed psychological illness. The latter portions were far more interesting (for me) than the former, particularly in her research on hyper-sensitive amygdalae in those with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Her research on the hereditary nature of anxiety - and on the long-term ramifications of maladaptive family functioning - are really interesting. And the line that resonated with me most about her own anxiety was this one: "I worry that my worry will scare away those I love" -- a sentiment anyone who struggles with anxiety can understand.

But instead of connecting more deeply with the reader as she writes about her acute (and chronic) bouts of anxiety, she just rambles on about her countless symptoms, doctors' visits, and diagnoses. The one important point I think she makes is that anxiety is all about the fear of what could happen. She writes, "Real peril galvanizes me. It's fear -- not danger -- that shuts me down."

While there are some revelatory and relatable parts of the book, I think it just as easily could've been a long (and probably more focused) essay. 2.5 stars!

[Atila Iamarino · Rating 4 out of 5]

Uma auto-biografia de Andrea Petersen voltada para a difícil convivência dela com a ansiedade. A narrativa da autora me fez me conectar muito mais e me colocar no lugar dela por vários momentos. Não sou uma pessoa ansiosa, então bastante importante essa perspectiva para entender como alguém vê o mundo de forma bem diferente da minha.

Ela passa pelo entendimento psicológico da doença, fisiológico e genético. O aspecto psicológico entra na terapia cognitivo-comportamental e o fisiológico discute os medicamentos que ajudam a tratar a ansiedade. O que achei que deu uma perspectiva bem ampla. Gostei bastante do final, quando ela começa a discutir sinais de ansiedade na filha e o que fazem/como lidar com isso desde muito cedo.

Me fez perceber que uma série de "doenças" e "distúrbios" (as aspas são porque não sei como classificar mesmo) como fobias podem na verdade ser diferentes manifestações de uma base de ansiedade comum. Acho que muita gente pode ter ansiedade "patológica" e não saber por não conseguir interpretar os sintomas.

[Christian D. D. · Rating 5 out of 5]

An invaluable contribution to the study of anxiety disorders

Speaking myself as someone with Generalised Anxiety Disorder (G.A.D.) and whose father was bipolar, I find the WSJ's Andrea Petersen's "On Edge" to be eminently readable, relatable, informative, and eye-opening. This book earns my highest recommendation.

RANDOM STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS NOTES AND OBSERVATIONS (and noteworthy passages):

--p. 1:" Fear ambushes me."

"University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, a bucolic campus of creaky A-frame houses, earnest politics, fraternity sweatshirts, and dollar pitchers of beer."

--p. 2: "Crazy like my grandmother. Like the woman who clutched knives and thought Catholics were trying to kill her." Yikes!

--p. 3: "I will be told that I am fine. One doctor will fire me." Huh?? How can the Doc fire you unless you're his employee as opposed to his patient/client?

--p. 5: "The rest of the time I worried, living with the nervous expectation of imminent disaster (diagnosis: generalized anxiety disorder, or GAD)."

--p. 6: "In any given year, about 40 million American adults have an anxiety disorder." Yet how many of those are willing to even talk about it, let alone seek treatment for it?

--p. 7: Well, I suppose this may partially answer my previous question: "While some of the rise may be because of increased prevalence, it could also be that more people are comfortable asking for help and admitting their troubles to researchers." Good to see that the stigma for seeking help is slowly being reduced, but it's still out there.

"Depression may get most of the headlines and the research dollars, but anxiety is more prevalent." As a GAD sufferer whose Dad was bipolar, I can certainly relate!

--p. 8: "But the most cogent definition I’ve heard comes from Christian Grillon, a neuroscientist at the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). 'Anxiety is the anticipation of pain,' he told me. 'It could be physical pain or emotional pain.'"
Anxiety is related to fear but is distinct. Whereas fear is concrete and imminent, anxiety is, as Grillon says, 'sustained uncertainty.' It’s a chronic sense of uneasiness about a vague future, a gnawing worry about what may or may not happen.

--p. 9: "Yes, studies show that, in Japan, only about 4 percent of the population has an anxiety disorder in a given year," yet doesn't Japan have one of the highest suicide rates of any country in the industrialised world?

--p. 10: on a lighter note, a Michigan Wolverine dating a Michigan State Spartan--fraternising with the enemy? ;-)

--p. 13: Outta curiosity, which "small southern Illinois town?" Somewhere in St. Clair County by any chance?

......ah, okay, Salem....(gotta look up which County that's is)....

--p. 26: Lookup band The Amygdaloids

--p. 43: "Trauma during childhood is a strong predictor of psychiatric disorders, including depression, drug and alcohol abuse, ADHD, and anxiety disorders"........"More than half of respondents had experienced at least one, with divorce, violence in the family, and the **mental illness of a parent** among the most typical." (emphasis added)

--p. 44: "Interestingly, the traumas specifically linked to anxiety disorders are childhood physical illness and economic adversity."

"My mother says that when I got a cold, it almost always turned into a nasty bout of **bronchitis**." (emphasis added)

--p. 45: "Research today is showing a link between respiratory illnesses and anxiety."

--p. 47: "Overprotective and controlling parenting—telling kids what to think and feel and micromanaging their activities—sends the message that children aren’t capable, a belief that can fuel anxiety."

--p. 48: "The one parenting behavior that did appear to have a strong impact on a child’s anxiety was 'granting autonomy,' which explained 18 percent of the variance in childhood anxiety."

--p. 59: "The overlap was highest (about 15 percent) between schizophrenia and bipolar disorder and lowest (about 3 percent) between schizophrenia and autism."

--p. 60: "Genetic research into anxiety disorders has been hampered by small sample sizes, says McMahon. Some scientists believe this is because of inadequate funding. Also, anxiety disorders often coexist with other mental illnesses, such as depression, which muddies the waters."

--p. 77: "'There’s been very little funding for anxiety genetics despite the fact that it is a massive public health problem,' says Jordan Smoller, a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and a leading genetic researcher. 'Anxiety disorders don’t quite have the visibility' of schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and autism. 'People underrecognize the toll that [anxiety] takes on people’s lives.'" Ain't that the truth (says this GAD-addled son of a bipolar Dad)!

--p. 86: "Kagan also discovered that blond, blue-eyed, fair-skinned children were more likely to be inhibited, a finding that, he believed, may indicate that the same genes influence both eye color and temperament."

--p. 97: "In the 1950s, while Freudian psychoanalysis reigned, therapy for anxiety disorders took a huge step forward with Joseph Wolpe, a South African psychiatrist."

--p. 100: "I’m unusual, however, in that I sought help from the medical system at all. People with panic disorder wait an average of ten years before discussing their symptoms with a doctor, psychologist, or other professional (including an acupuncturist or “spiritual advisor”). Those with social phobia delay sixteen years; **those with generalized anxiety disorder, nine years**." [emphasis added]

--p. 108: "It is very unfashionable to say that you suck at meditation. I suck at meditation."

--p. 111: "It turns out that I’m not the only anxious person who loses it while trying to chill out. A phenomenon called relaxation-induced anxiety appears in the scientific literature at least as far back as the 1980s."

--p. 119: "ABM appears to be most beneficial for GAD, social anxiety disorder, and PTSD."

--p. 120: "Another relatively new technology is transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), which has been approved by the FDA as a treatment for migraines and for treatment-resistant major depression. Now researchers are exploring whether it could effectively treat anxiety disorders. TMS is noninvasive; a device that generates a magnetic field is placed above the scalp directly over the part of the brain researchers want to stimulate. While the science is preliminary, TMS has shown benefits for people with GAD, PTSD, and panic disorder."

--p. 124: Karaoke, woot-woot!

--p. 126: Celexa (Citalopram) reference!

--p. 129: "We were in that giddy stage of new love, just five or so months in, and deep in the emotional striptease of joyful declarations and new confidences." Ah, so eloquent.

--p. 137: Klonopin (generic clonazepam), "literally a chill pill."

--p. 159: "People with anxiety disorders were also more likely to work from home, to be self-employed, or to be employed by the government." Whoa, hey, I resemble that last clause!

--p. 160: "Of the more than ten million Americans receiving disability benefits in 2015, less than 3 percent got them because of an anxiety disorder..." Well, in my case, I receive 20% from the V.A, though anxiety disorder wasn't the only factor in my disability rating (my recurrent bronchitis and back issues were also variables in that equation).

--p. 161: "Research shows, however, that anxiety is linked to some aspects of perfectionism but not others." I myself am a perfectionist when it comes to (1) handgun marksmanship and (2) academics (other than math).

--p. 168: "A small 2012 study looked at the intelligence of people with GAD compared with controls. Among GAD patients, those with the most severe symptoms had the highest IQs. But among the controls, those with the least anxiety had the highest IQs. The researchers argue that this may make evolutionary sense. Society needs smart, relaxed people, but it needs intelligent, high-strung ones, too." 147 IQ myself (when I last got officially tested back in the 6th grade).

--p. 183: "It is no surprise that wanderlust and anxiety do not mix well. Unfortunately, I have both." Same here.

--p. 187: "travel is an antidote to my anxiety. Anxiety shrinks my world, but travel expands it." Hear, hear.

--p. 192: "And in another example of a negative feedback loop, bullying can lead to increased social anxiety. Adolescents who are frequently picked on are two to three times more likely to develop an anxiety disorder, according to one 2014 study." Based upon my personal childhood experience, I can relate.

RANDOM QUESTIONS FOR THE AUTHOR (which I'll have to ask her next time I message her on LinkedIn):
--How did you manage to cope with the stresses of being a sorority pledge with your condition(s)?
--Did you still attend Wolverine football and/or b-ball games in spite of the challenges?

[Bkwmlee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Let me start off by saying that this book was definitely not what I expected it would be. When I first read the book description, I had thought this would be a memoir of sorts, about a woman living with anxiety, how it manifests itself in her life and how she handles it, etc. with some factual information and research included as backup. While the author did indeed recount her personal journey through anxiety in the book, it unfortunately fell a bit short for me because too much of her story was bogged down by facts and statistics as well as a lot of scientific and technical details that I felt was not all that necessary. At times, I felt like I was reading a scientific journal rather than a memoir. Don’t get me wrong though – this book was absolutely well-researched and those looking for a more scientific explanation of anxiety interwoven with personal anecdotes and stories will probably appreciate the approach the author took with this book. For me, I loved the personal stories the author told about her struggle with anxiety and the background with her family as well as the plentiful real-life examples she gave to illustrate particular points – these sections worked well for me and it helped to see how the author came to accept anxiety and learned to live in harmony with it. I also appreciate the author’s tremendous honesty in sharing some of the most intimate details of her life and the role her anxiety played during these moments. However, on the flip side, there were too many times while reading where I got “lost” in the science, to the point that I felt overwhelmed with too many statistics dancing around in my head. I’ve never been a science person, which is why I tend to avoid books that are overly scientific or technical, since I know my brain can’t handle it and the information will just pass right through, as it did in this case. It didn’t matter how many times I tried to re-read those sections, nothing was sticking so in the end, I gave up trying.

I initially chose to read this book because I struggle with anxiety myself and so I was interested in seeing how the author’s experience was similar or different to mine. Subconsciously, I guess I was also looking for some “best practices” of sorts – some insight into how others deal with their anxiety that I could perhaps apply to my own situation. While I got this partially through the author’s personal story, I think I would’ve been able to connect more with the author’s experience if the focus had been more on her story rather than the science and statistics behind it.

In terms of recommendation, I would suggest reading other reviews before making a determination. I think for those who don’t have a problem with too much science or technical facts, this would be an excellent read, as the author’s story truly was interesting and there was much to offer in terms of practical application for others who may be similarly struggling with anxiety. It didn’t quite work out for me, but I would still consider this a good, solid book that I don’t regret reading.

Received advance reader’s copy from Crown Publishing via NetGalley

[Jess Clayton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finally! A mental health book that is more than just science and statistics. This is a personal memoir of a professional adult who has dealt with anxiety for most of her life and came out of it with an understanding of how to live with it. She is open and honest and very detailed about each stage of discovery. She does include the science as well, but it supports her stories, rather than hinders them.

Dealing with a parent with severe anxiety has been challenging and a lot of the time, I am clueless how to deal with it. Reading this has helped me understand it a little better. I can relate to their actions better and know how to respond. Sadly, even though I struggle with light bouts of it, I still have trouble deciphering all the many ways anxiety manifests itself.

I would strongly recommend you read this book if you have loved ones who have anxiety so you can see what they go through and how you can help support them. She covers everything from childhood anxiety to anxiety in the workplace. There is a chapter on college students dealing with anxiety ...and another one on anxiety treatments throughout history. It's written with great honesty and accuracy. I may even add this one to my personal library for future reference. Thanks to net galley and the publisher for providing this e-ARC to me in advance!

[Jill · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was a really dry book and I actually ended up skimming a lot. I am fascinated by this topic as I have anxiety myself but this book just didn’t interest me like others.

[Daria Zeoli · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is part memoir, part research paper. I think that both parts are important, though I was drawn more to the author's personal story of anxiety and think that's where the strength of the book lies.

In today's world, it sometimes seems impossible not to live "on edge." The cited studies and statistics gave me a lot to think about as someone who has never been diagnosed with anxiety but wonders if she exhibits too many of the symptoms.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a review copy.

[Brittany Hargrave · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is for those who experience anxiety and those who want to better understand people who do (perhaps because they work in health care/mental health or because they love someone who experiences disordered anxiety).

Personally, I can’t think of another book that has made me feel as understood as this one has. Many of Petersen’s experiences mirror my own. Beyond how relatable she is, Petersen uses her book to report on the latest studies in anxiety research and treatment advancements. This book has been massively helpful for me in my search to understand my own brain.

[Mack · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who also struggles with anxiety, this book was like hearing "it's okay" from a smarter, more experienced friend. I really loved the format—the personal anecdotes blend effortlessly with the psychological data Petersen breaks down. This really is a crash course in what anxiety is, how debilitating it can be, and what you can do to combat it. While there's plenty of great information presented here, the strongest balm for my own anxious brain in this book was Petersen's own story. One of the worst things about anxiety is thinking no one else in the world can feel this way, you're the only person nuts enough to be freaking out about this, that, or the other thing, no one else feels like they're going to die several times a week or even several times a day. To have a resource like this is something I'm truly grateful for: proof and consolation from a fellow sufferer. Also, it's worth noting a lot of her anxiety is focused around hypochondria (at times, it felt like I was reading my own thoughts as she recounted her experiences) so, if that's also something you struggle with, this book is even more well worth checking out. Definitely check this out if you're having a rough time or want to understand why certain people around you are.

[Meg · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a proud card-carrying member of the Anxiety Team, I try to read books on the subject to brainstorm ideas to help myself....and also understand why so many people have it/what can be done to help. I also AVOID these books, because in a silly superstitious move, I worry if I read about it I will cause my anxiety to come back full force....and no one wants that. I know this is silly, so I do grab a book from time to time- but ignore them when I need to be fit- or if I am having a hard month/day.
This book is the best book on anxiety that I have read so far- a mix of memoir - information about anxiety- I found a LOT of Andrea's statements rang true in my experience and also had me reevaluating happenings in my timeline. I appreciated her very raw shares of how bad her anxiety is- and also her struggle with life and having a child. I do not think my anxiety is as bad as hers (at least up until now!)- but it was interesting to read about how some of her anxiety has caused her to have life altering fears- and to see how she dealt with it.
I do recommend- if you have anxiety- that you don't follow her example, but make sure you talk to a doctor- because some of her decisions (not to be on medications) may not apply to you, but definitely nice to see someone with the same situations as you (you're not crazy).

Read if you suffer from the joys of anxiety or would like to understand the disease better.

[Sarah W. · Rating 4 out of 5]

At times, when the author described her own anxiety in this book, I could feel myself becoming more anxious too. I found the discussion of academic studies intriguing, although I'll confess much of the information isn't new to me. However, it's always worthwhile to hear the message of healthy eating, sleep, and exercise reinforced in the quest for anxiety management. No magical solution emerges from this book, but it's still good reading for the anxious.

[Teressa Morris · Rating 5 out of 5]

What I appreciated most about On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety was Andrea Petersen's personal story about her own anxiety. Although we had vastly different upbringings, and even different experiences with anxiety, I couldn't help but feel a kinship with the author. After all, my own journey through anxiety is a big part of this blog (see Comfortable in My Own Skin).

My first impression as I was reading through the various causes of adult anxiety, was that poor Bud was doomed from a very young age. As the author says, "Anxiety disorders almost certainly have multiple causes - from genetics to childhood trauma to how your parents interact with you. And for any given person, the mix of these factors will be as singular as a fingerprint." However, some major factors popped up which specifically fit our youngest child.

First, there is evidence that what happens to the mother can alter the development of the fetus. According to Petersen, "This means that children of anxious moms don't just have a genetic predisposition to anxiety; anxiety may actually be transmitted in utero."

In addition, a study surveying nearly 700 high school students "found that a serious illness or infection during the first year of life strongly predicted anxiety disorders by the teenage years." Bud had chicken pox at 2 months and pneumonia at six months old.

The research is inconclusive on whether or not parenting can actually cause anxiety. However, it does seem that for a child who is predisposed to anxiety, an anxious, hovering parent certainly doesn't help. I'm sorry to say that I was that parent, in many ways. Bud remembers me telling him that he couldn't be out of my sight when he was playing outside because someone could "snatch him off the street." I suppose there is a fine line between teaching your child safety and leaving them permanently scarred.

There were so many insights in this book that I have decided to break my review into three parts. Look for part two next week.

[Jen · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book is actually a 4-5 star read, because it was very well written, meticulously researched, honest, etc. etc. blah, blah blah...but I am so biased against it that I struggled to read it without wanting to hurl it out the window.

When I was 30 years old, my mom died. I spent a lot of time crying, anxious, and depressed, grieving and distraught. Everyday tasks were difficult to do, at best. My Aunt suggested to me that I go to a doctor and get prescribed pills for my depression and/or anxiety. What? My mom HAS DIED. It is NATURAL and NORMAL to be depressed and go through those emotions; I understood right then what a fucked up system our medical world had become.

I picked up this book for several reasons. One, I've been dealing with anxiety lately, more so than usual. I also have "lost" a friend who, deciding she needed to medicate herself out of her anxiety/depression, became basically a shell of her former self, someone I no longer recognized. With this book, I wanted to hear about someone else's experience in living with anxiety and depression; I thought maybe it would help me understand my own anxiety, maybe help me feel better about myself.

And it has. It's helped me to realize, Whoa, I'm pretty fucking normal, and rather than doing everything in my power to change this quality about myself, I am EMBRACING IT by accepting that it is who I am. So with that said, I felt genuinely sorry for this author, whose life has basically consisted of rejecting who she is (someone with anxiety) and has popped who knows how many pills to "get through" moments that are perfectly naturally anxiety-ridden ones (her father being ill, giving a speech, etc.). But once I learned that she continued popping her pills while pregnant, thereby possibly injuring her child in the process (yeah, the pharmaceutical companies say their pills are safe, and her kid is young right now so who knows what long-term effects that child might suffer), my feeling sorry for her turned to genuine dislike. Selfish!

In all fairness, the author also attempted many non-medication related ways to combat her anxiety, but the allure of the quick fix of the pill was apparently too much to overcome...

So here is my premise: I do not believe generalized anxiety and depression are a disease. I believe that they are part of the NORMAL HUMAN CONDITION, and by claiming otherwise and medicating ourselves we have completely disregarded what it means to be human. We have complex emotions swirling in a complex brain, and depression and anxiety and worry are a part of our existence. These emotions should be worked through and allowed to happen, versus mellowing them out with medications with a whole slew of side effects that in turn necessitate more pills. When we have problems, as all humans do, our best defense is work them through - I am a firm believer in therapy, meditation, exercise, etc. Wake up sheeple! Our pharmaceutical industry has us hooked. The zombie apocalypse is happening now, not in the form of the dead coming back to life but in the living pill popping themselves into the half-dead.

[Haley · Rating 1 out of 5]

I’ve been reading a lot of fiction lately, and it’s been a little while since I’ve reviewed any psychology nonfiction. I was excited to read Andrea Petersen’s On Edge–it’s always so encouraging to hear success stories from people who have had similar battles with anxiety that I have had.

However, I was confused right away, because On Edge is supposed to be Andrea Petersen’s memoirs…and it is not that at all. But neither is it exactly an objective journalistic history of psychology.

On Edge smothers us with too much information. In an effort to explain her diagnosis, Petersen gives a complicated back story of mental illness, pulling the reader in too many directions all at once. We are with her grandmother in the institution, we are with Petersen in a mid-flight panic attack, and then we are deeply entrenched in an incredibly boring History of Psychology class. I couldn’t figure out what end was up!

I would love to read Andrea Petersen’s memoirs. And I would love to read a book written by Andrea Petersen giving me detailed information about anxiety and mental illness. But to try and combine the two, and still keep the history sections objective just were not happening. Maybe that wasn’t the point, but it sure made it hard on me to switch gears so often. She needs to pick one and stick with it. This was a DNF–I made it halfway and then just couldn’t keep going. That’s highly unusual for a book of this subject matter.

[Nikola · Rating 4 out of 5]

You can also find this review on my book blog.

As always I’ll start the review by saying how I came upon this book: I was looking for more mental health memoirs/non-fiction to read and stumbled upon this book in the publishers catalogue. The very first thing that attracted me towards this book is the subject matter it deals with: anxiety. The reason why that interested me is because I, myself am an anxious person and have always been one. Anxiety before a test, check, Anxiety whilst going to the supermarket, check, Anxiety while talking to people face to face, check. I still haven’t learned how to control my anxiety and I often avoid social situations but I guess that in time I’ll learn how to better cope with anxiety and anxious thoughts.

The author of this book is a journalist who has been suffering from anxiety disorders since she was a child but has been officially diagnosed in her twenties. We enter the mind of Petersen and experience her life filled with anxiety, panic attacks and more anxiety. This book is half memoir half psychology/science book combined together. It is divided into nine chapters with each one concentrating on different aspects of anxiety which is really fascinating. Example:

1. THE ANTICIPATION OF PAIN: DEFINING ANXIETY
2. SCARY CLOWNS AND THE END OF DAYS: ANXIETY IN CHILDHOOD
3. MY GRANDMOTHER’S MADNESS: THE GENETICS OF ANXIETY
4. and more..

In On Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety the author offers insight into new research, history, effects of anxiety, drugs, treatment as well as her experience with it. While reading this book I’ve learned a lot more about anxiety in general but also the correlation between anxiety, depression and suicide:

‘Depression is the mental illness most strongly associated with suicidal thoughts, but it doesn’t often lead to suicidal acts. Recent research has found that it is anxiety disorders and other illnesses, like problems with impulse control or addiction, that are more likely to lead to suicide attempts.’

I have also learned the origin of the post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) which Jacob Da Costa, an American physician discovered during the Civil War – an American soldier was complaining about ‘lancinating pains in the cardiac region, so tense that he was obliged to throw himself upon the ground’ which were resurfacing every so often. As a result of this he has named the soldiers condition ‘irritable heart syndrome’. Freud has called anxiety disorders ‘The Anxiety-Neurosis’ and he paved the way for better understanding of anxieties and panic attacks (even though his approaches always had a connection with the unconscious and repressed urges).

I very much enjoyed reading about Petersen’s experience with anxiety and panic attacks – we also got insight into her life, family anamnesis with mental illness. The author compares gender roles – focusing on women’s and how having an anxiety disorder and its treatment was handled in the past.

‘The writer Charlotte Perkins Gilman has described her experience with the rest cure in the autobiographical short story The Yellow Wallpaper…

Deprived of distraction and any intellectual life, the heroine [of the short story spends hours staring at the yellow wallpaper in her room, gradually descending into madness…

...The rest cure was primarily prescribed to women. When Theodore Roosevelt was diagnosed with neurasthenia, his doctor sent him to a dude ranch in the Dakotas for a spell of riding and hunting.’

There were also harrowing facts that show how more and more people in the US suffer from anxiety disorders and other mental illnesses. Nowadays there are many focus groups, group therapies and other resources that can help prevent and manage many disorders. Petersen describes her experience with therapies such as CBT, ACT and many other but what mainly helped her was yoga with its calming effects on the mind of the one who’s doing it. What stayed with me when I finished this book is that nowadays scientists are trying to find better ways to control/ease anxiety in people and that is done by doing MRI scans on the brain while the brain is exposed to the source of the phobia/anxiety (e.g. arachnophobia: people are shown pictures of spiders, moving spiders are shown in virtual reality..) and they are trying to find ways to make people more comfortable with their phobia/anxiety.

In one particular chapter of the book we learn about medications which are used in order to treat disorders and their origins. Petersen compares drugs and therapy and gives us the ups and downs of both. She also shares her worries about her pregnancy and the fear of her daughter having an anxiety disorder. A wide range of studies, research, effects of anxiety on the brain and the body are described in this book and getting further into them would make this review an essay.

The final chapter of the book focuses on her present living and coping with anxiety and also at what is causing anxiety in young people today. The main reason for anxiety in young people is academia and academic achievements also the pressure that young people feel over getting good grades and making their parents proud. What we are left with is the knowledge that there are many sources of anxiety but what we should know is that we shouldn’t shy away from asking for help and support in dealing with something that’s causing us anxiety or mental health problems.

Some (not all) research and information may not be new to readers who study/have studied psychology/psychiatry but a person approaching this book without any knowledge will be left with information which will surely widen their knowledge on this subject.

A very well researched book filled with tons of useful information for anyone interested in anxiety disorders and psychology/psychiatry.

Release date: May 16th 2017 by Crown Publishing

I would like to thank the publisher Crown Publishing (Penguin Random House) and NetGalley for providing me with a review copy of this book in exchange for an honest review of the same.

[Stephanie Griffin · Rating 2 out of 5]

Reading this book made me anxious!

[Kelli · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars

I initially picked up this book because my husband just recently had a pretty severe panic attack on his way to work one morning. This caused him to miss the majority of work through the month of January this year. I, having never dealt with anxiety in my life, only depression, didn't understand this at all, even though I work in behavioral health and see anxiety every day at work.

Why could he no longer drive to work? Why could he drive to the grocery store but not his 30 minute commute? Why could he skip work and lounge around the house all day with seemingly no anxiety? All these questions were going around my head and I knew I needed to understand more, which lead me to this author's memoir on her life with anxiety.

While I feel I definitely understand anxiety a good bit more having read this, I think I was expecting something different. There was a ton of really useful information in here, but I think I was searching more for do's and dont's of being a spouse of someone with anxiety. I should wait for Andrea's husband's book for that one.

Andrea gave a pretty comprehensive look into her life and the many different aspects of living with anxiety, how it can manifest itself and the current treatment and research into anxiety. It was, at times, a little bit too research focused, but I think it did add value to what she was claiming from her own life.

Overall a great book on anxiety, what it feels like, and how your brain can spiral out of control on a moment's notice. It was illuminating and interesting and helped me to understand this side of my husband just a bit better. I would recommend to anyone who is dealing with anxiety themselves (although you should probably be in a good place mentally before diving in) or anyone who has loved ones who suffer from anxiety disorders.

[Cassidy · Rating 4 out of 5]

"If you met me, you probably wouldn't even notice my anxiety. When I began telling acquaintances the topic of this book, they almost uniformly said, 'I would never have guess you're anxious.'"

This may be one of the first book reviews I've written, mainly because I am very interested and passionate about this topic. One in three Americans will have an anxiety disorder at some point during their lives. There is currently no "cure."

Although I didn't find myself relating to the specific type of anxiety the author has, I did notice a few similarities that stood out to me. Mental illness is extremely misunderstood in our society and for someone who lives with it everyday, it's nice to see an author explain it in a way that more people may understand.

The quote I started this review with made me think of a conversation I recently had with someone. After explaining anxiety and how to cope with it every single day, they responded with, "Can't you just stop being anxious? Like it's not a real illness, it's just all in your head."

Yes actually, it is all in my head. It's a chemical imbalance that I did not choose to have. It's an illness that I would not wish on my worst enemy. It's something that I have tried to "fix" everyday. This book gave me reassurance that there are other people out there like me and there is hope.

[Zach Koenig · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a person who suffers from above-average levels of anxiety (and sometimes significantly so), it is good for me from time to time to read about others' experiences in the same realm. Though "On Edge" went into more science than I would like to (or even can) understand, the majority of the content still resonated with me.

What Andrea Peterson does in this book is use her own personal experiences as kind of a jumping-off point for discussing anxiety through multiple different lenses. When Peterson is relating stories of her anxiety, the material really felt valuable to me. Though I don't suffer from as much panic-induced type anxiety, most of her experiences I could still relate to. It is "nice" (probably not the right word) to know that other people are often feeling the same way I do.

When not talking about herself, Peterson explores other avenues of anxiety including its base in heredity, cognitive behavioral therapy, and medicinal treatment (among others). I'd say about half of this material (if not a bit more) was very interesting to me. The parts I skimmed were those that got very technical, and that does indeed happen from time to time. I can't ding the book too harshly for this, as I'm sure it is still great information, but a decent amount went right over my head in terms of overall complexity.

Overall, "On Edge" was a very worthwhile read for me and would be also for those who deal with panic, general anxiety, or worry on a consistent basis. Peterson has been through those trenches, if you will, and that grants her some credibility in conversing on the topics at hand. Very relatable to general audiences, and the real in-depth material can be enjoyed on a sliding scale of your own knowledge level on the subject.

[Leah K · Rating 3 out of 5]

First off, kudos to the author for putting it all out there and discussing her anxiety and other issues. It's not an easy thing to discuss, sometimes even with close friends, let alone a bunch of strangers. High five to Andrea Petersen.

My reason for the 3 star review? The format. I've read many books with a mix of scientific facts and history strewn into a memoir type books. Makes sense. Tell us your story and back it with science when applicable! But, usually this is cut more succinctly - one chapter on the person's life, one on the science, one on the person's life..etc etc. In this case, the author would be talking about her childhood or a moment and suddenly just into studies and history, right in the middle. It snapped me out of the moment too abruptly. I loved this woman's story. I found myself nodding my head through many of her situations - been there, done that, yay anxiety! I enjoyed the science - oh! that's why I react that way! I just wish there had been a bit more delineation between the two.

[Julie lit pour les autres · Rating 3 out of 5]

*3.5/5

Entre le memoir et le documentaire scientifique. Avec beaucoup d'humanité et d'humilité, Petersen - qui est journaliste au Wall Street Journal - raconte comment elle vit avec l'anxiété. Elle creuse aussi le sujet en explorant les thérapies, les développements pharmaceutiques et les dernières percées scientifiques dans le domaine.

Certains passages sont formidables, criant de vérité et élèvent le livre. Je pense en particulier au chapitre sur l'impact de l'anxiété sur les relations interpersonnelles et amoureuses, qui est douloureux et nécessaire. L'aridité des passages scientifiques me fait hésiter à mettre ce livre dans les mains de toutes les personnes intéressées par le sujet. Ces passages sont beaucoup moins accessibles, malheureusement. Ceci dit, le témoignage de Petersen mérite d'être lu, ne serait-ce que pour son évocation réussie de la complexité de l'état anxieux.

[Judy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Peterson has significant anxiety disorder and "On Edge" chronicles her anxiety and explores the research around anxiety. She is a reporter for the Wall Street Journal, so the book is meticulously researched and although she reveals intimate details about her anxiety and hypochondria, there is a dispassionate nature to the work. I debated the "stars" and would give it between a 3-4, a 3.5. I care for patients who have anxiety, and her need to go to emergency rooms frequently/excessively clarified a pattern I've seen. Her descriptions of her anxiety were extremely detailed and almost painful to read. In her exploration of her anxiety, from the point of view of a reporter, Peterson has somehow both revealed herself and yet hasn't explored the topic with the insight I would have wanted. Her final summary of how anxiety has enriched her life was barely a page long, but that kind of true insight and self revelation would have made this careful and detailed exploration of a woman who is highly functional despite almost crippling anxiety rise to another level.

[Warren Benton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Petersen suffers from anxiety.  In college, she had panic attacks that shut her down.  She went home for a couple months and just tried to shut out the whole world.  Petersen gives us an inside look into what she was going through. Then she turns to her journalistic side and gives us the history of studying mental illnesses.  Starting with her grandmother,  Petersen explains how little was known of various mental illness back in the 1950's.  That the doctors of the time tended to lump all mental illness into one big problem.  Discussing the many strategies tried over the many years of study, Petersen discusses what seemed to help her the most.  Cognitive reappraisal seemed to help her a lot.  What is the probability of getting in a plane crash?  What is the likelihood of really getting MRSA? Another tactic that she discusses is exposure therapy.  

Petersen becomes very transparent throughout the book.  She discusses how her anxiety has hindered many of her dating relationships, how it has affected her work, and how she worries it will roll over into her parenting.   

I enjoyed how she talked about the many treatments she has undergone, the many meds she has tried over the years, and the many times that even though she was getting treatment, therapy, and on meds sometimes her anxiety would still overtake her.  

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was a giveaway winner of "On Edge A Journey Through Anxiety" Andrea Petersen gives a personal account on her struggle with Anxiety disorder. She is very honest about what she has been through over her life. In childhood, College, adult years. Different medications she has been on etc.
She gives studies of how mental anxieties have been dealt with medically, such as shock therapy, medications. I was not to happy to read about the experiments on animals researchers have done. This was pretty interesting for the most part. I would give this book a 3.5.

[Dove · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think I can safely conclude that I freaking love psychology books. First, last year, I really got into reading memoirs- stories about people's lives, where they tell us about everything they've been through and the lessons they have learned. Then, I started getting into psychology books that expand my understanding about mental illnesses and disorders, and preps me for my future career. Then, I found these types of books- a perfect combo of both! It's a psychological book, focused on anxiety, that tells you everything you need to know about anxiety like what it is, the genetics of it, how it ties in with pregnancy and future generations, how it gets in the way of your life, and the pros and cons of it. But it's also the author's real life journey about anxiety, so she ties in her family, friends, education, schooling, boyfriends, husbands, etc. It's her life story supplemented with reports, facts, and studies about anxiety to make the book both educational and also interesting like a normal story. It was just an amazing book I really loved everything. I learned a lot about anxiety, but I also enjoyed it. The author really is so inspirational I cannot believe she went through all of that, and came out so strong. I'm so proud of her, it gives me hope for others who are suffering anxiety.