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Death's not taking the news he received at the end of Paper Cuts very well.
Dave is still getting used to the undead trying kill him at regular intervals while he and Anne attempt to solve the mystery of the strange forces that continue to engulf London.
And Melanie's still putting up with more than any person should in a relationship.
When the true nature of what lies at the dark heart of UberSystems International is revealed, can the team pull together and stop the impending bijou Apocalypse-ette?
Death's come to kick ass and eat biscuits. And he's all out of biscuits.
Dave is still getting used to the undead trying kill him at regular intervals while he and Anne attempt to solve the mystery of the strange forces that continue to engulf London.
And Melanie's still putting up with more than any person should in a relationship.
When the true nature of what lies at the dark heart of UberSystems International is revealed, can the team pull together and stop the impending bijou Apocalypse-ette?
Death's come to kick ass and eat biscuits. And he's all out of biscuits.
156 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 2, 2016
107 people are currently reading
128 people want to read
About the author
Dave Turner
9 books155 followersDave Turner is an award winning writer whose work has featured on the websites of BBC News, The Guardian, The Daily Telegraph, The Times, The Huffington Post and FHM.
In 2011 he won the Best Screenplay Award at London Screenwriters' Festival with his short film script 'Everything You Need'. After selling various screenplays which you will note you have not seen as films at your local multiplex, he created Aim For The Head books to publish his work. He has written two novellas, How To Be Dead and Paper Cuts, which are available from Amazon now.
In 2011 he won the Best Screenplay Award at London Screenwriters' Festival with his short film script 'Everything You Need'. After selling various screenplays which you will note you have not seen as films at your local multiplex, he created Aim For The Head books to publish his work. He has written two novellas, How To Be Dead and Paper Cuts, which are available from Amazon now.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
November 12, 2023
«‘The Bible? Is that the one that starts off well, tails off in the middle, ends up with the bloke dying and then coming back to life?’
‘Yes.’
‘And then beats up Agent Smith?’
‘That’s The Matrix.’
‘Oh yeah. Now that’s a good film.’»
Bahaha! Joining Death at work is always a good time.
September 11, 2024
Like #1, I didn’t want this to end (I’m way too attached to the characters already), so here’s hoping for more stories about Dave, Melanie, Gary, Anne and, of course, Death
August 17, 2022
Dave Turner reminds me a bit of Douglas Adams - Hilarious observations of life's mundane moments wrapped up with thick layer of sarcasm. Throw in some horror genre and the threat of the apocalypse, and you have the makings of a fun read!
I don’t want to tell you the story, I want you to read them, Dave Turner has a way with words. I don't want to ruin the best lines, but I actual laugh/snorted at a few. Conquest's (one of the original Four Horsemen) entire wedding is worth the price of the series.
I don’t want to tell you the story, I want you to read them, Dave Turner has a way with words. I don't want to ruin the best lines, but I actual laugh/snorted at a few. Conquest's (one of the original Four Horsemen) entire wedding is worth the price of the series.
January 14, 2024
Black holes were the most destructive things in the universe. Arseholes were a close second…
OK, what can I say now about "Old Haunts" that I haven't already used in my reviews for "How To Be Dead" (aka novellete or Book 1) or "Paper Cuts"? Um, well, a lot of the truly neat-o bits we've seen in these first two chapters really get expounded (expanded?) upon here, rising to a rather destructive wave of, erm, destruction that nearly brings London to its metaphorically pale and clammy knees. Thank goodness everyone loves each other when it's all said and done, right? No, I didn't think so either… damn you, Margaret Thatcher!
It's the nights you have to worry about. The dark nights that stretch out like a dark stretchy thing.
By this time, if you've been reading along to not only my summarizations but actually the books themselves, you are as addicted to Dave Turner's writing as I have become in just a few short days. I had actually started these as part of a group reading challenge (waves to the DMG Crypt gang!) and thought "ok, it can't hurt, let's see Brother Rick (not Dave, sorry) has recommended". Well, now I'm stuck because I'm going to keep reading these hilarious and well-written books until there are no more to stack up on my creaky old nightstand! I again have to just underline that if you ever want to gift me ANY books, THESE are the kinds that I love!
Death had become disillusioned with humanity in the 80s… The threat of nuclear war, the depletion of the ozone layer, Bon Jovi. The list of humanity's crimes against nature was long and hideous.
Yes, though I've said this before AND keep repeating myself, too, this series is hitting on all cylinders for me. The characters speak to me, the humour speaks to me, and yes, that doll in the corner of my daughter's room still speaks to me, but that's an issue we'll deal with another time. Dave Turner's writing is witty without being flippant and he can have us grabbing our sides even while we're running away from very real mortal danger. Look, if you've ever been down in the Underground at any time after 11 a.m. on a Friday in London, you know exactly of what I speak!
Time stretches out before me like an endless ocean. I am drowning in time.
So yeah, sure, this final bit to Omnibus the First is noticeably more philosophical. But when you're dealing with any number of all-powerful, apparently-not-as-immortal-as-we-thought beings, and the consequences of not getting, well, death or even Death right, that's going to turn up now and then. I'm really enjoying that we're getting to know everyone a bit better - in particular Anne this go 'round - and can only admit to my nearly unbridled enthusiasm to keep the show going! See you soooooooon! Did that sound spooky? Or just kind of sad? I'll work on it…
OK, what can I say now about "Old Haunts" that I haven't already used in my reviews for "How To Be Dead" (aka novellete or Book 1) or "Paper Cuts"? Um, well, a lot of the truly neat-o bits we've seen in these first two chapters really get expounded (expanded?) upon here, rising to a rather destructive wave of, erm, destruction that nearly brings London to its metaphorically pale and clammy knees. Thank goodness everyone loves each other when it's all said and done, right? No, I didn't think so either… damn you, Margaret Thatcher!
It's the nights you have to worry about. The dark nights that stretch out like a dark stretchy thing.
By this time, if you've been reading along to not only my summarizations but actually the books themselves, you are as addicted to Dave Turner's writing as I have become in just a few short days. I had actually started these as part of a group reading challenge (waves to the DMG Crypt gang!) and thought "ok, it can't hurt, let's see Brother Rick (not Dave, sorry) has recommended". Well, now I'm stuck because I'm going to keep reading these hilarious and well-written books until there are no more to stack up on my creaky old nightstand! I again have to just underline that if you ever want to gift me ANY books, THESE are the kinds that I love!
Death had become disillusioned with humanity in the 80s… The threat of nuclear war, the depletion of the ozone layer, Bon Jovi. The list of humanity's crimes against nature was long and hideous.
Yes, though I've said this before AND keep repeating myself, too, this series is hitting on all cylinders for me. The characters speak to me, the humour speaks to me, and yes, that doll in the corner of my daughter's room still speaks to me, but that's an issue we'll deal with another time. Dave Turner's writing is witty without being flippant and he can have us grabbing our sides even while we're running away from very real mortal danger. Look, if you've ever been down in the Underground at any time after 11 a.m. on a Friday in London, you know exactly of what I speak!
Time stretches out before me like an endless ocean. I am drowning in time.
So yeah, sure, this final bit to Omnibus the First is noticeably more philosophical. But when you're dealing with any number of all-powerful, apparently-not-as-immortal-as-we-thought beings, and the consequences of not getting, well, death or even Death right, that's going to turn up now and then. I'm really enjoying that we're getting to know everyone a bit better - in particular Anne this go 'round - and can only admit to my nearly unbridled enthusiasm to keep the show going! See you soooooooon! Did that sound spooky? Or just kind of sad? I'll work on it…
January 3, 2025
The 3rd book in the "How to be dead" Grim Reaper series by Dave Turner.
Pretty much following on from book two after Dave and Mel survived a vampire attack the mysterious "Dark" is causing problems in London. People are angry and aggressive - which is basically London anyway, but it's been magnified on a large scale. Something sinister is happening and Death can't really help. It's up to Dave and Anne, with Mel in tow, to save the say. The journey takes them back to Dave's old work place, the UberSystems building which featured in book 1 and 2. Why is that building so central to all the trouble unfolding?
I enjoyed this book. It wasn't as jovial as the last two but it still had a fun and exciting story. It was well written and flowed nicely. It was also short enough to get through it in a few hours. 4/5
Pretty much following on from book two after Dave and Mel survived a vampire attack the mysterious "Dark" is causing problems in London. People are angry and aggressive - which is basically London anyway, but it's been magnified on a large scale. Something sinister is happening and Death can't really help. It's up to Dave and Anne, with Mel in tow, to save the say. The journey takes them back to Dave's old work place, the UberSystems building which featured in book 1 and 2. Why is that building so central to all the trouble unfolding?
I enjoyed this book. It wasn't as jovial as the last two but it still had a fun and exciting story. It was well written and flowed nicely. It was also short enough to get through it in a few hours. 4/5
February 27, 2017
If you've enjoyed the series thus far, you'll be quite happy with the concluding volume. It is in just the same vein as the first two books, but I found it to be slightly more mature in both the plot line and the way the book was structured. Don't worry though, this did nothing to effect the sense of humour in the characters and the writing.
"Anne picked her mobile phone up off the bedside table. A text message from Death.
I'VE JUST HAD A KIT KAT THAT WAS ALL CHOCOLATE NO WAFER. WHERE'S YOUR PRECIOUS SCIENCE NOW?"
"Anne picked her mobile phone up off the bedside table. A text message from Death.
I'VE JUST HAD A KIT KAT THAT WAS ALL CHOCOLATE NO WAFER. WHERE'S YOUR PRECIOUS SCIENCE NOW?"
November 18, 2016
Really good story, the last in the series of "How To Be Dead" in this series plenty of action, vampires , a good immortal turns bad, this book has it all to be honest.
We also get to find out more about Anne's past and how she ended up working for Death and being his friend.
I really enjoyed this book, looking forward to reading other books by this Author when he publishes them.
We also get to find out more about Anne's past and how she ended up working for Death and being his friend.
I really enjoyed this book, looking forward to reading other books by this Author when he publishes them.
January 24, 2024
Gah, an improvement on the second book, that was already a fun read.
A little of backstory and some tying of loose ends, as well as incorporating more of Melanie in the plot. Full of clever dumb jokes that will keep you laughing throughout the whole time.
This series is a keeper. Just wish the books were a little longer, with more adventures and more jokes.
A little of backstory and some tying of loose ends, as well as incorporating more of Melanie in the plot. Full of clever dumb jokes that will keep you laughing throughout the whole time.
This series is a keeper. Just wish the books were a little longer, with more adventures and more jokes.
March 11, 2018
Didn't like this one as much as the previous 2 books in the series. Didn't seem to have as much humor and was less clear what the supernatural force was. Still, it was fun. Will read the 4th book of this "trilogy."
June 29, 2018
Another amusing read
I love this series. Death is his usual laid back sarcastic self and the humour keeps you laughing. Now I know why the older generation always have tea and biscuits in the house. Excellent read
I love this series. Death is his usual laid back sarcastic self and the humour keeps you laughing. Now I know why the older generation always have tea and biscuits in the house. Excellent read
June 2, 2020
Another non book
A non-book, if you've read How To Be Dead. Profoundly disappointing, and a bit dishonest. Why bundle three books together if two are exerpts of the other one? Certainly hope noone paid for three.
A non-book, if you've read How To Be Dead. Profoundly disappointing, and a bit dishonest. Why bundle three books together if two are exerpts of the other one? Certainly hope noone paid for three.
March 31, 2021
Best one of the series so far. Great plot developments. Another fast paced book with short chapters. Some character development from Anne and a neat ending that doesn't end on a cliff hanger. Off to buy the next ones in the series...😁
April 24, 2021
Just as expected, this was a witty, entertaining, and interesting read. There were some deep parts that made me reflect a lot about the book and my life, but always with that touch of comedy that makes everything better.
February 11, 2023
Loving this series
Each one is better than the last. The action is awesome the suspense builds until you are thrust into action you didn't see coming. Gonna start the next book right now. Loved it!!
Each one is better than the last. The action is awesome the suspense builds until you are thrust into action you didn't see coming. Gonna start the next book right now. Loved it!!
September 22, 2023
3.5 ⭐
This is the furthest I've read in the series so far. As I mentioned in my previous review, I miss the levity from the first installation. That being said, this novella is a nice temporary stopping point in the storyline as it concludes the events thus far.
This is the furthest I've read in the series so far. As I mentioned in my previous review, I miss the levity from the first installation. That being said, this novella is a nice temporary stopping point in the storyline as it concludes the events thus far.
September 9, 2024
Really loved the humour of Book 1, but Books 2 & 3 waned somewhat. I am glad I they were packaged together as one tome as I wouldn't have read beyond Book 2 otherwise. I don't think I will bother with Books 4-6, which only seem to be available individually.
May 4, 2018
I enjoyed all three of these, and am recommending them to friends. Think Douglas Adams meets Terry Pratchett.
January 15, 2019
Top Read!!!!
Read it! Read the others too! They’re all good, you won’t be disappointed. I don’t drink tea but I like biscuits. End of review!
Read it! Read the others too! They’re all good, you won’t be disappointed. I don’t drink tea but I like biscuits. End of review!
February 9, 2019
Funny end of civilisation book
Laugh out loud novella. Really worth a read. The full series is great. Definitely recommend. Well written with good editing.
Laugh out loud novella. Really worth a read. The full series is great. Definitely recommend. Well written with good editing.
May 2, 2020
Really enjoying the series.
Death. Rules.
Death. Rules.
August 22, 2020
A mix of excitement and humour.
April 30, 2021
A little slower paced than the first two volumes, but still entertaining.
August 11, 2022
A sad but satisfying end to the first three books of the series. Loved reading them!
August 12, 2022
DNF
This was to slow for me.
This was to slow for me.
December 7, 2022
Another cheery tale of death being a complete arse.
February 13, 2023
Great
Really enjoying these books. Glad I found them. Escapism and a good laugh. Total change from all the serious stuff in today's climate is just what I need 😁😁
Really enjoying these books. Glad I found them. Escapism and a good laugh. Total change from all the serious stuff in today's climate is just what I need 😁😁
April 24, 2023
A really enjoyable end to the series arc.
May 12, 2023
Dave, Melanie, Anne and Death are back and need to stop Conquest from unleashing the darkness over London. Another good and amusing story, that moves at a nice pace, as long as the biscuits last!
May 17, 2023
Fun Read
I'm enjoying the series. It's easy reading; funny and well written enough that it is easy to suspend reality, and slip into the world of Dave, Anne, and Death.
I'm enjoying the series. It's easy reading; funny and well written enough that it is easy to suspend reality, and slip into the world of Dave, Anne, and Death.
November 19, 2023
Just the same as my review for the previous book in the series. Sorry, I thought it was going to be humorous, but no, it was nothing of the sort.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews