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Hope after Faith: An Ex-Pastor's Journey from Belief to Atheism
Atheism’s leading lights have long been intellectuals raised in the secular and academic worlds: Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, and the late Christopher Hitchens. By contrast, Jerry DeWitt was born and bred into the church and was in fact a Pentecostal preacher before arriving at atheism through an extraordinary dialogue with faith that spanned more than a quarter of a century. Hope After Faith is his account of that journey.
DeWitt was a pastor in the town of DeRidder, Louisiana, and was a fixture of the community. In private, however, he’d begun to question his faith. Late one night in May 2011, a member of his flock called seeking prayer for her brother who had been in a serious accident. As DeWitt searched for the right words to console her, speech failed him, and he found that the faith which once had formed the cornerstone of his life had finally crumbled to dust. When it became public knowledge that DeWitt was now an atheist, he found himself shunned by much of DeRidder’s highly religious community, losing nearly everything he’d known.
DeWitt’s struggle for identity and meaning mirrors the one currently facing millions of people around the world. With both agnosticism and atheism entering the mainstream—one in five Americans now claim no religious affiliation, according to a recent study—the moment has arrived for a new atheist voice, one that is respectful of faith and religious traditions yet warmly embraces a life free of religion, finding not skepticism and cold doubt but rather profound meaning and hope. Hope After Faith is the story of one man’s evolution toward a committed and considered atheism, one driven by humanism, a profound moral dimension, and a happiness and self-confidence obtained through living free of fear.
DeWitt was a pastor in the town of DeRidder, Louisiana, and was a fixture of the community. In private, however, he’d begun to question his faith. Late one night in May 2011, a member of his flock called seeking prayer for her brother who had been in a serious accident. As DeWitt searched for the right words to console her, speech failed him, and he found that the faith which once had formed the cornerstone of his life had finally crumbled to dust. When it became public knowledge that DeWitt was now an atheist, he found himself shunned by much of DeRidder’s highly religious community, losing nearly everything he’d known.
DeWitt’s struggle for identity and meaning mirrors the one currently facing millions of people around the world. With both agnosticism and atheism entering the mainstream—one in five Americans now claim no religious affiliation, according to a recent study—the moment has arrived for a new atheist voice, one that is respectful of faith and religious traditions yet warmly embraces a life free of religion, finding not skepticism and cold doubt but rather profound meaning and hope. Hope After Faith is the story of one man’s evolution toward a committed and considered atheism, one driven by humanism, a profound moral dimension, and a happiness and self-confidence obtained through living free of fear.
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First published January 1, 2013
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About the author
Jerry DeWitt
3 books17 followersJerry DeWitt is an American author, public speaker, and leader in the American atheism movement. He is a former pastor of two evangelical churches, who publicly converted to atheism in 2011 after twenty-five years of Christian ministry . He is the author of the book Hope after Faith: An Ex-Pastor’s Journey from Belief to Atheism.
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May 25, 2013
This is a hard book to review.
Reading the book is heart-breaking. My desire is to be one who reads both sides of each story. Proverbs 18:17 says, "The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him." We should always study to make sure what we believe is backed by evidence. That is why as a believing Christian, I want to read those who oppose the faith. When those who oppose Christianity can only use straw-man arguments, It actually strengthens my faith.
Like the subtitle states, this book is about an ex-pastor who leaves Christianity for atheism. The book itself is well written and easy to read. It drives you to read more to find out what happens next. The writing is engaging and very good..... Now for the negative - the content.
I though that Dewitt's transformation would have been something intellectual. Maybe he would have garnered some evidence that convinced him that Christianity was false. Maybe he read some information that, in his mind, proved there was no God. Maybe he felt the arguments for evolution were strong enough to drive him from the faith. But this was not the case. He admits at the end of the book that his atheism does not have proofs. Because he can not prove there is, or is no God, he takes his atheism by faith. He sees it as another religion - just one with a different God - Him.
Most of his disillusionment with Christianity was because God did not give him the things he wanted. He wanted to be a famous evangelist. He wanted no one to get sick or die. He wanted money without getting a real job. (I do believe a pastor has a real job, but what he was doing was not)
Since God did not do things the way he wanted...there must be no God. He believed, because God did not answer every prayer with a "Yes", that his prayers were not answered. Let's say that he did received every thing he asked for, would that have proved to him there was a God?
Dewitt started preaching at 17. That, in itself, should raise questions. Who, at 17, would know enough about the Bible, doctrine, or even life itself to teach others? The answer - No one. How many 17 year-olds would you trust with a major problem in life? This child should have never been in the pulpit. Even after being married, they lived with his grandmother for years. 1 Timothy 5:8 says "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel." Get a job, then worry about being famous. Many preachers in small churches work a second job because the budget is so small in their church. He doesn't even become a pastor of his own church until after he became agnostic. He wrote about how he withheld that truth for years. He couldn't pray to God for his members, but he could take their money for his salary.
Back to his younger days, he spends years searching for HIS doctrine. Who does he go to? Does he search out people who have spent a lifetime studying scripture? Does he enroll in college? Does he look for theologians that spent years in college working out every nuance of Greek and Hebrew? Did he do an in-depth study apologetics? No! Instead he joined numerous cults.
He became a Branhamite. William Branham believed he was Elijah and the 7th angel in Revelations. His followers sing hymns with Branhams name in them. He then moves to a cult that believed only their denomination was going to heaven. They believed there was 2 in the Godhead. I have never heard of anyone believing such a thing and I have been a Christian for 30 years. he then moves to the Oneness Pentecostals, who also do not believe in the Trinity and are not considered orthodox in belief.
After all was said and done, he never really understood the Gospel. It does not consist of rules about how long your hair is or what you are wearing. It is - Jesus died in our place! The sin each of us has committed, has to be punished and Jesus was punished in our place.
Dewitt tries to make his journey seem like it has a happy ending, but he just traded one cult for another. He fawns over Dawkins and Hitchens like he did the preachers he idolized when he was young.
It is a sad ending. He said he lost everything because of his atheism, but most things, like his marriage, were lost long before he came out of the closet. I wished he had been introduced to some saner Christians in his younger life, maybe this tragedy would have never taken place.
If you read this book, you will probably do it for it's entertainment value, not for knowledge.
I give the book 5 stars for writing and 2 stars for logic = 3 stars
I received this book, free of charge, from Da Capo Press and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Reading the book is heart-breaking. My desire is to be one who reads both sides of each story. Proverbs 18:17 says, "The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him." We should always study to make sure what we believe is backed by evidence. That is why as a believing Christian, I want to read those who oppose the faith. When those who oppose Christianity can only use straw-man arguments, It actually strengthens my faith.
Like the subtitle states, this book is about an ex-pastor who leaves Christianity for atheism. The book itself is well written and easy to read. It drives you to read more to find out what happens next. The writing is engaging and very good..... Now for the negative - the content.
I though that Dewitt's transformation would have been something intellectual. Maybe he would have garnered some evidence that convinced him that Christianity was false. Maybe he read some information that, in his mind, proved there was no God. Maybe he felt the arguments for evolution were strong enough to drive him from the faith. But this was not the case. He admits at the end of the book that his atheism does not have proofs. Because he can not prove there is, or is no God, he takes his atheism by faith. He sees it as another religion - just one with a different God - Him.
Most of his disillusionment with Christianity was because God did not give him the things he wanted. He wanted to be a famous evangelist. He wanted no one to get sick or die. He wanted money without getting a real job. (I do believe a pastor has a real job, but what he was doing was not)
Since God did not do things the way he wanted...there must be no God. He believed, because God did not answer every prayer with a "Yes", that his prayers were not answered. Let's say that he did received every thing he asked for, would that have proved to him there was a God?
Dewitt started preaching at 17. That, in itself, should raise questions. Who, at 17, would know enough about the Bible, doctrine, or even life itself to teach others? The answer - No one. How many 17 year-olds would you trust with a major problem in life? This child should have never been in the pulpit. Even after being married, they lived with his grandmother for years. 1 Timothy 5:8 says "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel." Get a job, then worry about being famous. Many preachers in small churches work a second job because the budget is so small in their church. He doesn't even become a pastor of his own church until after he became agnostic. He wrote about how he withheld that truth for years. He couldn't pray to God for his members, but he could take their money for his salary.
Back to his younger days, he spends years searching for HIS doctrine. Who does he go to? Does he search out people who have spent a lifetime studying scripture? Does he enroll in college? Does he look for theologians that spent years in college working out every nuance of Greek and Hebrew? Did he do an in-depth study apologetics? No! Instead he joined numerous cults.
He became a Branhamite. William Branham believed he was Elijah and the 7th angel in Revelations. His followers sing hymns with Branhams name in them. He then moves to a cult that believed only their denomination was going to heaven. They believed there was 2 in the Godhead. I have never heard of anyone believing such a thing and I have been a Christian for 30 years. he then moves to the Oneness Pentecostals, who also do not believe in the Trinity and are not considered orthodox in belief.
After all was said and done, he never really understood the Gospel. It does not consist of rules about how long your hair is or what you are wearing. It is - Jesus died in our place! The sin each of us has committed, has to be punished and Jesus was punished in our place.
Dewitt tries to make his journey seem like it has a happy ending, but he just traded one cult for another. He fawns over Dawkins and Hitchens like he did the preachers he idolized when he was young.
It is a sad ending. He said he lost everything because of his atheism, but most things, like his marriage, were lost long before he came out of the closet. I wished he had been introduced to some saner Christians in his younger life, maybe this tragedy would have never taken place.
If you read this book, you will probably do it for it's entertainment value, not for knowledge.
I give the book 5 stars for writing and 2 stars for logic = 3 stars
I received this book, free of charge, from Da Capo Press and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
September 20, 2015
If you're looking for a book by a Christian pastor who researched all the arguments for Christianity and atheism, delved deep into science and philosophy, consulted with experts in biblical interpretation, and reached a rational conclusion that Christianity can't be true-- this book is NOT it. In fact, I'm skeptical Jerry DeWitt will remain an atheist just because he's been so gullible to change by a range of charlatans and seems to embrace the beliefs found in whatever book he happens to open. The lack of logic, introspection, and research in this book is truly frustrating. Richard Dawkins and others endorsing Jerry as some sort of hero for atheism is pretty sad because anyone reading this book should be repelled by his ignorance both about his prior faith and his current atheism.
The book is really no more interesting than if it had been a former professing Christian atheist engineer or accountant or politician who became the atheist-- and those happen every day. But attach the title "pastor" and I guess it sells the book. Really, DeWitt was only a "pastor" late in his career after he'd already decided the Bible was mostly mythical. Previously, he had been an "evangelist," a traveling itinerant preacher or a fill-in, hoping eventually to have his own church. There is very little "pastoring" in the book. My previous book review was for a book on biblical qualifications for the title of elder/pastor; DeWitt is lacking many, which is an indictment of the groups who thrust him into the pulpit.
Several other reviewers nailed it: it's hard to like a book that is so self-centered and lacked a decent editor to remove the mundane details like breakfast foods and DeWitt's first airplane ride (as an adult). This book is all about Jerry. Jerry gets mad at God for not answering prayers as Jerry wants. He gets frustrated with God not being who he thought he was-- rarely consulting with anyone else about his concerns. He's self-centered in how he describes the churches he preached at, criticizing the manners of those he encounters, criticizing every kind act anyone made toward him, the architecture of the buildings, how little they put in the offering plate, etc. In the end, when his wife has had enough of the drop-everything-on-a-whim life he lets her leave because "it was best for me." We're supposed to feel sorry for him in the end because his community won't accept him as an atheist. He never stops to realize that it's precisely because he spent years preaching at them not to trust or have anything to do with godless atheists. They're behaving exactly as he told them they should. Yet, he seems to completely lack any social thinking skills-- it's all about him-- so he sees this as unfair.
The danger of this book is that it paints a stereotype of the Christian church that atheists may love to believe but is far from the reality. There are no benevolence ministries, clothes closets, counseling services, soup kitchens, foreign aid, schools, small-group studies, or universities built in this book-- which leaves out a huge amount of what the Church has done for the last 2,000 years. Churches in Jerry's world are apparently places people go to get something in return for giving money or trying hard to live a "pure" life and never become biblically literate (more on that below). God is some sort of piggy bank that will dispense what you're looking for if you just shake hard enough-- sort of like a Green Lantern approach to faith and foreign either to the Bible or historical orthodox Christianity.
Jerry DeWitt's biggest error is that he is too self-centered to seek help from friends or potential mentors in this book, and that leads to even greater hardship and frustration. He's thrust into the limelight at age 17 and never gets any training. He just assumes he must be right, and when he makes contradictory decisions on his journey he doesn't understand why people don't follow. He wrote a piece for the Huffington Post about his "five step" journey from minister to atheist that makes no sense to anyone because the sources he cites are so obscure. Most people reading this have never heard of William Branham or the Branhamite cult, for example; most Christians are waiting for Jesus to return, not Bill Branham, David Koresh, or some other dead American who claimed to be a prophet. DeWitt comes across such random sources, believes them to be true, and embraces them until he exhausts any rationality and then abruptly moves on to something else. Also, the idea that every Christian exploring science and logic will abandon religion is also nonsense, as shown by the odd course that DeWitt lays out. Contrast this with Mike McHargue of the podcast "Ask Science Mike," whose story you can read here: http://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-s...
Or with former atheist philosopher Anthony Flew, or C.S. Lewis, or a variety of PhD physicists and philosophers who still subscribe to Christianity, etc.
DeWitt admits he never learned how to read a Bible, only becoming "painfully aware" late in his life that it didn't just "drop from the sky" and actually "was written by human authors." This should not come as a surprise to anyone who claims to be a teacher of the Bible and it creates frustration for the reader as Jerry talks like he is among an elite few who have made this "discovery." When he gives up his faith in the Bible he points to one alleged contradiction-- the number of the stalls of Solomon's horses between 1 Kings 4:26 (40,000) and 2 Chron. 9:25 (4,000). There are a lot of easy explanations for this ranging from copyist error (the books were written at different times) to 4,000 stalls having chambers holding 10 horses each, etc. But my first response is "really?" Of all the things about the Bible he might have raised, this is it? Some detail that has no bearing on the meaning of the text at hand? And he never wants consults any of the volumes written on apologetics, I doubt he could explain the difference between a paradox and a contradiction. He has never learned Greek, Hebrew, history, philosophy, or any of the staples of the Western canon and orthodox Christianity that should be a staple of a pastor. He never seems to ask why the King James Version is the "only" version of his reading. Read some G.K. Chesterton, or C.S. Lewis, or N.T. Wright or William Lane Craig someone--anyone-- other than blindly follow a cult leader who claims Ephesians 2:20 is about him, for crying out loud. It's remarkable to me that DeWitt has the issue with Solomon's chariots but never examines there are a multitude of errors and logical contradictions in his new favorite books- including God is Not Great (which I have also read and reviewed).
“Skepticism is my nature;
Freethought is my methodology;
Agnosticism is my conclusion;
Atheism is my opinion;
Humanism is my motivation."
- Jerry DeWitt
There are contradictions in the above that speak for themselves, nonsense that he thinks sounds good.
I know of no biblical church that tries to hide behind history, and plenty of Christians are well read in the history of how the Bible was written and trained in exegesis and hermeneutics-- two words I think DeWitt doesn't know. If anything, this book is a scary reminder that there are groups claiming to be "churches" out there where errors have multiplied themselves tenfold precisely because they make some kid their leader based on his charismatic ability to speak. To DeWitt's credit, he avoids using the word "Christian" and uses "Pentecostal" instead, hinting that he'd agree with me that his experience is nothing like biblical Christianity. But he uses "mainstream Christianity believes..." in too many sentences before following with something orthodox Christianity does not teach (and no one I know adheres to or claims the Bible includes) for me to give him a pass.
I think DeWitt hides some ethical problems in this memoir. Towards the end, he takes on a pastoral role of a Korean Presbyterian church at the same time reading Joseph Miller has convinced him Christianity is mythology. Presbyterian churches require pastors to affirm the creeds of the church, which DeWitt-- if he was honest-- would not be able to do. Maybe he wanted to believe those things, but never did, so he likely lied in order to obtain and keep the position. He considers himself more enlightened than the congregation and continues the charade in order to "encourage" them.
Sadly, he doesn't discover "grace" until the end of the book and actually considers himself heterodox for embracing it. "The Gospel" is not a phrase you will read in this book. The gospel tells us that no amount of our own attempts to be holy earn us any favor with God; we can know God only because His son died for our sins and was resurrected (Jerry never investigates how the resurrection has held up under great historical scrutiny over the centuries). We are chosen by God not because of anything He has done, and He works things for His glory-- not our wishes. But perhaps because this grace is so contrary to the Pentacostalism he was raised with, he feels he has no choice but to leave. (If anything, this book will turn you off to anything with the word Pentacostal in it).
So, I took notes on the entire book but this review is long enough and I will simply save the details for myself. I give this book one star out of five. Poorly written, badly edited, self-centered, and not much you can learn from. If anything, you may find yourself yelling at the author to get an education; that may sound mean, but that's what it boiled down to for me. 1 star.
The book is really no more interesting than if it had been a former professing Christian atheist engineer or accountant or politician who became the atheist-- and those happen every day. But attach the title "pastor" and I guess it sells the book. Really, DeWitt was only a "pastor" late in his career after he'd already decided the Bible was mostly mythical. Previously, he had been an "evangelist," a traveling itinerant preacher or a fill-in, hoping eventually to have his own church. There is very little "pastoring" in the book. My previous book review was for a book on biblical qualifications for the title of elder/pastor; DeWitt is lacking many, which is an indictment of the groups who thrust him into the pulpit.
Several other reviewers nailed it: it's hard to like a book that is so self-centered and lacked a decent editor to remove the mundane details like breakfast foods and DeWitt's first airplane ride (as an adult). This book is all about Jerry. Jerry gets mad at God for not answering prayers as Jerry wants. He gets frustrated with God not being who he thought he was-- rarely consulting with anyone else about his concerns. He's self-centered in how he describes the churches he preached at, criticizing the manners of those he encounters, criticizing every kind act anyone made toward him, the architecture of the buildings, how little they put in the offering plate, etc. In the end, when his wife has had enough of the drop-everything-on-a-whim life he lets her leave because "it was best for me." We're supposed to feel sorry for him in the end because his community won't accept him as an atheist. He never stops to realize that it's precisely because he spent years preaching at them not to trust or have anything to do with godless atheists. They're behaving exactly as he told them they should. Yet, he seems to completely lack any social thinking skills-- it's all about him-- so he sees this as unfair.
The danger of this book is that it paints a stereotype of the Christian church that atheists may love to believe but is far from the reality. There are no benevolence ministries, clothes closets, counseling services, soup kitchens, foreign aid, schools, small-group studies, or universities built in this book-- which leaves out a huge amount of what the Church has done for the last 2,000 years. Churches in Jerry's world are apparently places people go to get something in return for giving money or trying hard to live a "pure" life and never become biblically literate (more on that below). God is some sort of piggy bank that will dispense what you're looking for if you just shake hard enough-- sort of like a Green Lantern approach to faith and foreign either to the Bible or historical orthodox Christianity.
Jerry DeWitt's biggest error is that he is too self-centered to seek help from friends or potential mentors in this book, and that leads to even greater hardship and frustration. He's thrust into the limelight at age 17 and never gets any training. He just assumes he must be right, and when he makes contradictory decisions on his journey he doesn't understand why people don't follow. He wrote a piece for the Huffington Post about his "five step" journey from minister to atheist that makes no sense to anyone because the sources he cites are so obscure. Most people reading this have never heard of William Branham or the Branhamite cult, for example; most Christians are waiting for Jesus to return, not Bill Branham, David Koresh, or some other dead American who claimed to be a prophet. DeWitt comes across such random sources, believes them to be true, and embraces them until he exhausts any rationality and then abruptly moves on to something else. Also, the idea that every Christian exploring science and logic will abandon religion is also nonsense, as shown by the odd course that DeWitt lays out. Contrast this with Mike McHargue of the podcast "Ask Science Mike," whose story you can read here: http://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-s...
Or with former atheist philosopher Anthony Flew, or C.S. Lewis, or a variety of PhD physicists and philosophers who still subscribe to Christianity, etc.
DeWitt admits he never learned how to read a Bible, only becoming "painfully aware" late in his life that it didn't just "drop from the sky" and actually "was written by human authors." This should not come as a surprise to anyone who claims to be a teacher of the Bible and it creates frustration for the reader as Jerry talks like he is among an elite few who have made this "discovery." When he gives up his faith in the Bible he points to one alleged contradiction-- the number of the stalls of Solomon's horses between 1 Kings 4:26 (40,000) and 2 Chron. 9:25 (4,000). There are a lot of easy explanations for this ranging from copyist error (the books were written at different times) to 4,000 stalls having chambers holding 10 horses each, etc. But my first response is "really?" Of all the things about the Bible he might have raised, this is it? Some detail that has no bearing on the meaning of the text at hand? And he never wants consults any of the volumes written on apologetics, I doubt he could explain the difference between a paradox and a contradiction. He has never learned Greek, Hebrew, history, philosophy, or any of the staples of the Western canon and orthodox Christianity that should be a staple of a pastor. He never seems to ask why the King James Version is the "only" version of his reading. Read some G.K. Chesterton, or C.S. Lewis, or N.T. Wright or William Lane Craig someone--anyone-- other than blindly follow a cult leader who claims Ephesians 2:20 is about him, for crying out loud. It's remarkable to me that DeWitt has the issue with Solomon's chariots but never examines there are a multitude of errors and logical contradictions in his new favorite books- including God is Not Great (which I have also read and reviewed).
“Skepticism is my nature;
Freethought is my methodology;
Agnosticism is my conclusion;
Atheism is my opinion;
Humanism is my motivation."
- Jerry DeWitt
There are contradictions in the above that speak for themselves, nonsense that he thinks sounds good.
I know of no biblical church that tries to hide behind history, and plenty of Christians are well read in the history of how the Bible was written and trained in exegesis and hermeneutics-- two words I think DeWitt doesn't know. If anything, this book is a scary reminder that there are groups claiming to be "churches" out there where errors have multiplied themselves tenfold precisely because they make some kid their leader based on his charismatic ability to speak. To DeWitt's credit, he avoids using the word "Christian" and uses "Pentecostal" instead, hinting that he'd agree with me that his experience is nothing like biblical Christianity. But he uses "mainstream Christianity believes..." in too many sentences before following with something orthodox Christianity does not teach (and no one I know adheres to or claims the Bible includes) for me to give him a pass.
I think DeWitt hides some ethical problems in this memoir. Towards the end, he takes on a pastoral role of a Korean Presbyterian church at the same time reading Joseph Miller has convinced him Christianity is mythology. Presbyterian churches require pastors to affirm the creeds of the church, which DeWitt-- if he was honest-- would not be able to do. Maybe he wanted to believe those things, but never did, so he likely lied in order to obtain and keep the position. He considers himself more enlightened than the congregation and continues the charade in order to "encourage" them.
Sadly, he doesn't discover "grace" until the end of the book and actually considers himself heterodox for embracing it. "The Gospel" is not a phrase you will read in this book. The gospel tells us that no amount of our own attempts to be holy earn us any favor with God; we can know God only because His son died for our sins and was resurrected (Jerry never investigates how the resurrection has held up under great historical scrutiny over the centuries). We are chosen by God not because of anything He has done, and He works things for His glory-- not our wishes. But perhaps because this grace is so contrary to the Pentacostalism he was raised with, he feels he has no choice but to leave. (If anything, this book will turn you off to anything with the word Pentacostal in it).
So, I took notes on the entire book but this review is long enough and I will simply save the details for myself. I give this book one star out of five. Poorly written, badly edited, self-centered, and not much you can learn from. If anything, you may find yourself yelling at the author to get an education; that may sound mean, but that's what it boiled down to for me. 1 star.
September 22, 2015
My favorite bit from the book is the opening epigraph, also by DeWitt:
"Skepticism is my nature.
Free Thought is my methodology.
Agnosticism is my conclusion.
Atheism is my opinion.
Humanitarianism is my motivation."
I've given this 4 stars because it struck a few chords with me personally. If it hadn't, I'd have probably gone with 3.
This book is basically a memoir of DeWitt's repeated struggles to find a doctrine he can preach that aligns with his own personal sense of morality. DeWitt does not spend a lot of time focusing on the logical, evidence based reasons for his loss of faith, instead his focus is on what he feels, so to anyone intending to read this book, if what you're looking for is the standard academic arguments for leaving religious supernaturalism behind then this is not the book for you.
On that note, the title of the book is somewhat deceptive, as the book is less about becoming an atheist (which is not a philosopy and has nothing to say about morality) and more about becoming a secular humanist (which is a philosopy and has much to say about morality).
Things I didn't like:
There are 4 or 5 chapters in the book but chapter 1 takes up nearly the first 3 quarters of the book. This wouldn't bother me if the narrative didn't seem to occasionally meander endlessly. The whole thing could've been broken up and arranged into parts and chapters which would've helped greatly with the flow. The writing is decent, it's done in a conversational style and having seen Dewitt speak, I could picture him reading the book aloud to a congregation. This in itself is fine, but because the writing is only decent it is not able to overcome the lack of a stronger editorial presence.
Things I liked:
Although my own path to secular humanism was very different, there were many things I could relate to. Dewitt experiences many "miracles" and moments of what seem like divine inspiration and he relates these from the perspective of someone who truly believes in them. I think this is a perspective that many atheists who either never or only casually believed could gain a better understanding of by reading this book. In addition, I found the world of southern evangelical christianity very interesting as I was only passingly familiar with it previously.
Lastly, I like the fact that at no point did it seem as if Dewitt were trying to "deconvert" the reader. He was truly telling his own personal story and his explanations for how he reaches each of his conclusions do not seem contrived or even final. If anything, you get the impression that he's certainly not done questioning his path in life yet.
This last aspect seemed to be a common complaint from other readers as it would be no surprise to see another book from him 15 years from now telling the story of how he left secular humanism behind. As much as evidence based logic plays a role in his conclusions, you very much get the feeling that secular humanism is just the doctrine that currently reconciles best with his personal sense of morality and it is this which is the true driver, not logic.
This may not be ideal, after all morality is dangerously subjective, but it is honest and reflects the reality for many people and besides, it seems to me a good deal better than dogma overriding personal morality.
Anyways, overall I'd say this book has something to offer both believers and non-believers who would like to broaden their perspectives.
"Skepticism is my nature.
Free Thought is my methodology.
Agnosticism is my conclusion.
Atheism is my opinion.
Humanitarianism is my motivation."
I've given this 4 stars because it struck a few chords with me personally. If it hadn't, I'd have probably gone with 3.
This book is basically a memoir of DeWitt's repeated struggles to find a doctrine he can preach that aligns with his own personal sense of morality. DeWitt does not spend a lot of time focusing on the logical, evidence based reasons for his loss of faith, instead his focus is on what he feels, so to anyone intending to read this book, if what you're looking for is the standard academic arguments for leaving religious supernaturalism behind then this is not the book for you.
On that note, the title of the book is somewhat deceptive, as the book is less about becoming an atheist (which is not a philosopy and has nothing to say about morality) and more about becoming a secular humanist (which is a philosopy and has much to say about morality).
Things I didn't like:
There are 4 or 5 chapters in the book but chapter 1 takes up nearly the first 3 quarters of the book. This wouldn't bother me if the narrative didn't seem to occasionally meander endlessly. The whole thing could've been broken up and arranged into parts and chapters which would've helped greatly with the flow. The writing is decent, it's done in a conversational style and having seen Dewitt speak, I could picture him reading the book aloud to a congregation. This in itself is fine, but because the writing is only decent it is not able to overcome the lack of a stronger editorial presence.
Things I liked:
Although my own path to secular humanism was very different, there were many things I could relate to. Dewitt experiences many "miracles" and moments of what seem like divine inspiration and he relates these from the perspective of someone who truly believes in them. I think this is a perspective that many atheists who either never or only casually believed could gain a better understanding of by reading this book. In addition, I found the world of southern evangelical christianity very interesting as I was only passingly familiar with it previously.
Lastly, I like the fact that at no point did it seem as if Dewitt were trying to "deconvert" the reader. He was truly telling his own personal story and his explanations for how he reaches each of his conclusions do not seem contrived or even final. If anything, you get the impression that he's certainly not done questioning his path in life yet.
This last aspect seemed to be a common complaint from other readers as it would be no surprise to see another book from him 15 years from now telling the story of how he left secular humanism behind. As much as evidence based logic plays a role in his conclusions, you very much get the feeling that secular humanism is just the doctrine that currently reconciles best with his personal sense of morality and it is this which is the true driver, not logic.
This may not be ideal, after all morality is dangerously subjective, but it is honest and reflects the reality for many people and besides, it seems to me a good deal better than dogma overriding personal morality.
Anyways, overall I'd say this book has something to offer both believers and non-believers who would like to broaden their perspectives.
June 11, 2013
"I was becoming painfully aware that I didn't understand the Bible, the bedrock that everything in my life was built upon. I had investigated concepts like eternal punishment but I had never broached the idea that the Bible might contradict itself or promulgate ideas that I didn't believe in... It was like a tornado had torn down every structure I inherited and built upon. I was not even standing on a slab but on bare dirt." - From Hope After Faith
In his fascinating spiritual memoir Hope After Faith, ex-pastor Jerry DeWitt (along with co-writer Ethan Brown) shares his tumultuous experience as a devout Pentecostal, hungry to be close to God and see the fires of revival sweep the South, and the crash/burn that resulted from witnessing too many unanswered prayers, ineffective ministrations, clergy hypocrisy, denominational infighting and Biblical contradictions.
From a salvation experience in the lush amphitheater of Jimmy Swaggart's Family Worship Center in its heyday to tiny, destitute churches of Louisiana, the author details the dizzying heights of frenzied revivals--and the crushing lows of personal rejection (after getting saved, his grandmother asked if he spoke in tongues--and because he didn't, his experience was negated), extreme poverty, dashed expectations and persistent doctrinal doubts.
Jerry's countless attempts to survive as a traveling evangelist--including trying to "sell" himself to pastors to get a booking, dealing with legalistic ministers with bizarre beliefs and attempting to reconcile the various doctrinal differences between Pentecostals--is heartbreaking to read. As a former Pentecostal minister myself, so much of Faith After Hope mirrored my own experiences--so while I couldn't put this memoir down, it stirred up some uncomfortable memories.
The first half of the book focuses on the numerous personalities within various churches and the author's own family--pastors, congregants, cousins, aunts, former schoolteachers, bosses, evangelists, etc.--and how each affected Jerry's personal doctrine, self-esteem and desire for fierce devotion to God. There's so many names, not to mention doctrinal minutia, that some readers may feel overwhelmed with details at first.
But stay with the book.
Once Hope After Faith reaches about the halfway mark, I realized why all this information was necessary: to show that Jerry was, indeed, a kind-hearted, servant of humanity who "searched the scriptures" just as the Bible admonished, sacrificed enormously (as did his longsuffering wife, Kelli) and strove for purity.
Except, when Jerry started to investigate the Bible, itself, instead of swallowing the Pentecostal doctrine du jour--going so far to delve into church history and the work of Joseph Campbell--the rational, sensible answers that surfaced shattered his world.
Jerry realized that he was an atheist.
The last half of Hope After Faith chronicles Jerry's anxiety and confusion as he continues to feel the magnetic pull of evangelism and desire to minister to humanity's suffering, yet realizes that that he no longer adheres to supernaturalism (the intervention of God or supreme beings in the affairs of men, especially in the form of healing, prophecy and miracles) nor believes the tenants he once cherished.
It then dawns on the author that ministers are "meaning machines", required to provide a sense and purpose to suffering humanity. When Jerry experiences a series of deaths--including a preacher's callous attempts to explain it (a beloved, smart teenage boy was killed in a car accident because, had he lived, he would have been tempted by worldliness and eventually lose his soul)--and advises a man to get surgery (he dies the next day, leaving the author wracked with guilt), the final, tenuous connection to Christianity (and its trappings) evaporates.
But what happens when a Pentecostal minister attends a Freethought Convention, gets his picture snapped with prominent atheist author Richard Dawkins and uploads it to Facebook?
Jerry thought he was actually going to get away with atheism in his hometown of DeRidder, Louisiana--but if you know anything about vengeful, shunning Pentecostals...
If you want to know what happens--and believe me, Hope After Faith is one helluva ride--then you must read this book. It's one of the most engrossing memoirs I've ever read (and I'm very picky). If you're a believer, it will have you reassessing what it means to be an atheist, especially a humanistic one (silly me, I assumed you had to be offensively pugilistic like Christopher Hitchens, Penn Jillette or Ricky Gervais to be one!).
And yes, if you have an open mind, your faith will be challenged...as it should be. Because as Jerry said at a NOSHA (New Orleans Secular Humanist Convention) banquet in October 2011:
"Reason and science have done more to ease human suffering in the last two hundred years than all the sermons put together have done in the last two thousand years."
In his fascinating spiritual memoir Hope After Faith, ex-pastor Jerry DeWitt (along with co-writer Ethan Brown) shares his tumultuous experience as a devout Pentecostal, hungry to be close to God and see the fires of revival sweep the South, and the crash/burn that resulted from witnessing too many unanswered prayers, ineffective ministrations, clergy hypocrisy, denominational infighting and Biblical contradictions.
From a salvation experience in the lush amphitheater of Jimmy Swaggart's Family Worship Center in its heyday to tiny, destitute churches of Louisiana, the author details the dizzying heights of frenzied revivals--and the crushing lows of personal rejection (after getting saved, his grandmother asked if he spoke in tongues--and because he didn't, his experience was negated), extreme poverty, dashed expectations and persistent doctrinal doubts.
Jerry's countless attempts to survive as a traveling evangelist--including trying to "sell" himself to pastors to get a booking, dealing with legalistic ministers with bizarre beliefs and attempting to reconcile the various doctrinal differences between Pentecostals--is heartbreaking to read. As a former Pentecostal minister myself, so much of Faith After Hope mirrored my own experiences--so while I couldn't put this memoir down, it stirred up some uncomfortable memories.
The first half of the book focuses on the numerous personalities within various churches and the author's own family--pastors, congregants, cousins, aunts, former schoolteachers, bosses, evangelists, etc.--and how each affected Jerry's personal doctrine, self-esteem and desire for fierce devotion to God. There's so many names, not to mention doctrinal minutia, that some readers may feel overwhelmed with details at first.
But stay with the book.
Once Hope After Faith reaches about the halfway mark, I realized why all this information was necessary: to show that Jerry was, indeed, a kind-hearted, servant of humanity who "searched the scriptures" just as the Bible admonished, sacrificed enormously (as did his longsuffering wife, Kelli) and strove for purity.
Except, when Jerry started to investigate the Bible, itself, instead of swallowing the Pentecostal doctrine du jour--going so far to delve into church history and the work of Joseph Campbell--the rational, sensible answers that surfaced shattered his world.
Jerry realized that he was an atheist.
The last half of Hope After Faith chronicles Jerry's anxiety and confusion as he continues to feel the magnetic pull of evangelism and desire to minister to humanity's suffering, yet realizes that that he no longer adheres to supernaturalism (the intervention of God or supreme beings in the affairs of men, especially in the form of healing, prophecy and miracles) nor believes the tenants he once cherished.
It then dawns on the author that ministers are "meaning machines", required to provide a sense and purpose to suffering humanity. When Jerry experiences a series of deaths--including a preacher's callous attempts to explain it (a beloved, smart teenage boy was killed in a car accident because, had he lived, he would have been tempted by worldliness and eventually lose his soul)--and advises a man to get surgery (he dies the next day, leaving the author wracked with guilt), the final, tenuous connection to Christianity (and its trappings) evaporates.
But what happens when a Pentecostal minister attends a Freethought Convention, gets his picture snapped with prominent atheist author Richard Dawkins and uploads it to Facebook?
Jerry thought he was actually going to get away with atheism in his hometown of DeRidder, Louisiana--but if you know anything about vengeful, shunning Pentecostals...
If you want to know what happens--and believe me, Hope After Faith is one helluva ride--then you must read this book. It's one of the most engrossing memoirs I've ever read (and I'm very picky). If you're a believer, it will have you reassessing what it means to be an atheist, especially a humanistic one (silly me, I assumed you had to be offensively pugilistic like Christopher Hitchens, Penn Jillette or Ricky Gervais to be one!).
And yes, if you have an open mind, your faith will be challenged...as it should be. Because as Jerry said at a NOSHA (New Orleans Secular Humanist Convention) banquet in October 2011:
"Reason and science have done more to ease human suffering in the last two hundred years than all the sermons put together have done in the last two thousand years."
June 18, 2013
Well, my goodness. What to say? Jerry shares his story of his life in the Pentecostal religion - growing up in it, becoming a pastor, and trying to make a career as an evangelist or pastor searching for the truth so that he could bring about a huge revival in the Christian religion. During his seeking in his lifetime he followed some rather bizarre teachings of some rather odd groups. Perhaps that is the norm in Pentecostalism? I am not familiar enough with it to know. After failing repeatedly as a pastor/evangelist and encountering some nutcase preachers, Jerry studied the Bible and turned to a goal of taking Jesus as his personal savior and leading people to do that rather than the faith healing speaking in tongues orientation of the Pentecostal religion that he was raised in. He learned that the Bible was written by mere men and not dictated by God, which freed him to open his beliefs more away from depending on correct interpretation of the Bible. Eventually, when faced with the fact that he no longer believed that praying did anything, he declared himself an atheist and quickly found a group of atheist ex-preachers to belong to.
Basically, he traded one hat for another; one group for another. Same song, different verse. He is still preaching and trying to help people and bring people to "the truth", but it is just a different "truth" than that of Pentecostalism or Christianity.
Now his religion is atheism.
I think that many non-Pentecostal Christians will just look at his experiences and feel that the group and beliefs that he was following in Pentecostalism were the "wrong" beliefs and that if he had just been in their group with their "correct" teachings, then he would not have been lead astray. The idea that his mother took his sister who has Down Syndrome to a faith healer to be healed of Down Syndrome just shows to me how totally ignorant the Pentecostal religion can be, and not only Pentecostalism I am sure, but other Christian groups who share similar "healing" beliefs.
However, every religious group has beliefs that can be seen as ignorant by outsiders.
The book is interesting and I enjoyed reading it.
Basically, he traded one hat for another; one group for another. Same song, different verse. He is still preaching and trying to help people and bring people to "the truth", but it is just a different "truth" than that of Pentecostalism or Christianity.
Now his religion is atheism.
I think that many non-Pentecostal Christians will just look at his experiences and feel that the group and beliefs that he was following in Pentecostalism were the "wrong" beliefs and that if he had just been in their group with their "correct" teachings, then he would not have been lead astray. The idea that his mother took his sister who has Down Syndrome to a faith healer to be healed of Down Syndrome just shows to me how totally ignorant the Pentecostal religion can be, and not only Pentecostalism I am sure, but other Christian groups who share similar "healing" beliefs.
However, every religious group has beliefs that can be seen as ignorant by outsiders.
The book is interesting and I enjoyed reading it.
August 19, 2013
Writing a memoir or personal essay is the literary equivalent of a high-wire act. It’s a thing of awe and wonder when it works, but the possibility of disaster is great. The margin of error is razor thin due to the “so what?” litmus test. All nonfiction needs to address this question, but it becomes far more stringent with memoir, which is the book version of going on a first date and talking only about yourself.
As much as I want to love Hope After Faith (as a fan of atheism, philosophy and memoir), it ultimately fails to meet the “so what?” criteria. This is not the fault of content, but rather infrastructure.
The structure of a memoir varies depending if the reader interest is on the writer or the event. One dives into Tina Fey’s Bossypants to learn more about the person. One picks up David Carr’s The Night of the Gun because they’re intrigued by the titular event, through which the reader will acquire interest in the writer.
Unfortunately, Hope After Faith begins with a chronological account of Jerry DeWitt’s life. Nothing personal, but since I don’t know the author, I’m not yet interested in his life story. The narrative would benefit from a stated thesis or present commentary rather than launching straight into DeWitt’s life story.
I’ve heard DeWitt is a great speaker, and I imagine he’d be a fascinating interview, but this is clearly a case where the prospective reader is drawn to the event more than the author. We hope to find the author interesting as well, of course, but the reason we crack the spine in the first place is to hear about his conversion.
That said, while this memoir didn’t work for me, I can see it being of interest and even value to others. Just know that the emphasis is more on the faith, not as much on the after.
www.ensuingchapters.com
As much as I want to love Hope After Faith (as a fan of atheism, philosophy and memoir), it ultimately fails to meet the “so what?” criteria. This is not the fault of content, but rather infrastructure.
The structure of a memoir varies depending if the reader interest is on the writer or the event. One dives into Tina Fey’s Bossypants to learn more about the person. One picks up David Carr’s The Night of the Gun because they’re intrigued by the titular event, through which the reader will acquire interest in the writer.
Unfortunately, Hope After Faith begins with a chronological account of Jerry DeWitt’s life. Nothing personal, but since I don’t know the author, I’m not yet interested in his life story. The narrative would benefit from a stated thesis or present commentary rather than launching straight into DeWitt’s life story.
I’ve heard DeWitt is a great speaker, and I imagine he’d be a fascinating interview, but this is clearly a case where the prospective reader is drawn to the event more than the author. We hope to find the author interesting as well, of course, but the reason we crack the spine in the first place is to hear about his conversion.
That said, while this memoir didn’t work for me, I can see it being of interest and even value to others. Just know that the emphasis is more on the faith, not as much on the after.
www.ensuingchapters.com
September 26, 2013
I have read a few of the reviews here, agree/disagree with some. Not really the point that everyone have same experience, in fact it's not the point at all.
My experience with Hope After Faith is colored in a manner which might make it very subjective, personal to some. Being a native of DeRidder, LA, about 20 yrs before Jerry, I felt myself drawn back into that society. Reluctantly, as it is on the whole too provincial just as it was when I grew up there in the 1950s-60s.
Having been born into a Southern Baptist family, but taken out of that church at an early age as my parents' marriage began to dissolve, I was raised in a small Episcopal church there. In reading of Jerry's childhood and his growth as a young minister, then his ultimate "growth out" of relgion, I could relate, as I have had a similar journey, though a different path. Along the way on my young journey there, I was touched by individuals who were very compassionate and loving, as Jerry is. Some of these were devout Christians of various denominations, some had become disillusioned and were no longer church goers. What this book illustrates is not only his very personal evolution toward an atheistic, better said, humanistic point of view, but the close,judgmental narrow-mindedness that exists in such a small southern town. This later aspect was so clearly brought back to me in this reading, realizing now how such fundamentalism permeated my family (except for me & my brothers),--this despite both my parents being college educated. This realization, together with seeing Jerry's obvious loving forgiving nature, gave me a great respect and admiration and love toward him.
It is a remarkable story of real integrity and courage.
My experience with Hope After Faith is colored in a manner which might make it very subjective, personal to some. Being a native of DeRidder, LA, about 20 yrs before Jerry, I felt myself drawn back into that society. Reluctantly, as it is on the whole too provincial just as it was when I grew up there in the 1950s-60s.
Having been born into a Southern Baptist family, but taken out of that church at an early age as my parents' marriage began to dissolve, I was raised in a small Episcopal church there. In reading of Jerry's childhood and his growth as a young minister, then his ultimate "growth out" of relgion, I could relate, as I have had a similar journey, though a different path. Along the way on my young journey there, I was touched by individuals who were very compassionate and loving, as Jerry is. Some of these were devout Christians of various denominations, some had become disillusioned and were no longer church goers. What this book illustrates is not only his very personal evolution toward an atheistic, better said, humanistic point of view, but the close,judgmental narrow-mindedness that exists in such a small southern town. This later aspect was so clearly brought back to me in this reading, realizing now how such fundamentalism permeated my family (except for me & my brothers),--this despite both my parents being college educated. This realization, together with seeing Jerry's obvious loving forgiving nature, gave me a great respect and admiration and love toward him.
It is a remarkable story of real integrity and courage.
April 29, 2016
Such a profound story. It was so difficult to put down the book. Jerry DeWitt successfully made me stick with his life-story, his pain, frustrations, success and in the end, his feeling and realization about his faith. I started slow in the first 2 days reading a few pages but today (Sunday), when I picked-up the book again, I basically read the rest of about 200 pages that was left, completing the book.
A truly inspiring story. Jerry DeWitt experienced a more difficult emotional, personal battle with his faith. A much more difficult realization than what Dan Barker experienced as mentioned in D Barker's own book, 'Godless.' Jerry and his family experienced financial struggles and emotional challenges that pushed his small family at a brink of breaking apart.
You can see Jerry DeWitt's life unfold and him... as a person seeing him matures. What a great book. A must-read for anyone who are experiencing the same battle with their own faith. What could be more compelling than the experience of someone like Jerry, a Pentecostal Pastor, with a very strong conviction in his religious faith then realizing everything was a delusion?
(book borrowed from the public library)
A truly inspiring story. Jerry DeWitt experienced a more difficult emotional, personal battle with his faith. A much more difficult realization than what Dan Barker experienced as mentioned in D Barker's own book, 'Godless.' Jerry and his family experienced financial struggles and emotional challenges that pushed his small family at a brink of breaking apart.
You can see Jerry DeWitt's life unfold and him... as a person seeing him matures. What a great book. A must-read for anyone who are experiencing the same battle with their own faith. What could be more compelling than the experience of someone like Jerry, a Pentecostal Pastor, with a very strong conviction in his religious faith then realizing everything was a delusion?
(book borrowed from the public library)
June 27, 2013
What a journey. Jerry's story is unique and special in that he was a church leader. Critics will try to convince you that he "didn't try hard enough" or "pray hard enough," but I would have to say as a church leader he may have given it more thought than those who pretend to drive from the backseat. I cannot relate to Jerry in a way others can, for I have hardly had any conviction in God in my life. I prayed a little in high school, when teen angst was high, but I have spent most of my life removed from religion.
I have lived a very privileged life. I've had stress, some sorrow, a bit of drama, but I have never experienced extreme hopelessness. I have had it quite easy. I'm well aware of my privilege and wish everyone else had it as good. And I'm not talking material wealth but pure life-joy. I love being alive. When I see the countless suns in the sky at night, I feel even more privileged that there may not be too many other planets up there circling those suns that have conscious entities looking back in my direction. We're special in our existence alone. Just being alive is meaningful, but then we actually get to do something with it!
What I do share with Jerry DeWitt is regret over wasted time. Our lives are short, so knowing now what we could have known all along is regretful, though we acknowledge its role in who we've become, and we hope we have plenty of time left to catch up. Lines are long and boring at the bank for a reason: that's pondering time. (Don't fritter it away scanning Facebook statuses.)
I was given a religion at birth, but I abandoned it early and my family would soon follow. Most of my life has been religion-free, but the religions of my parents, and most likely their parents, had induced in them habits and ideologies that let me know as a child the people we were supposed to dislike and how much the world was against us. Rather than trying to convince my parents otherwise, I quietly protested in my mind and maintained the status quo. I wore the suit they gave me, but every night, safe in my room, I ripped it off as fast as I could. And so my family saw the person they wanted to see. Two years ago, I burned that suit. I finally felt that I didn't have to wear it anymore. And here is where I relate to Jerry's path.
From the book...
and
A young Jerry DeWitt went on a quest to find himself and just happened to slip into a suit straight from the Goodwill of Pentecostalism, rather than seeking out a tailor and getting measured for some custom threads. When that second-hand, hand-me-down suit got itchy, he tried another slightly different one, adding some borrowed dress shoes to the look.
A friend and mentor saw his pants were hanging a bit long, and his sleeves were a tad short. He noticed in Jerry's grimace that his shoes were too tight. So he gave him the number of a fine tailor. Jerry started small. He bought a nice pair of socks, then a pair of shoes that made his feet sigh. Finally, he went down and got measured properly, and one day his suit arrived. He slipped it on, took a look in the mirror, and started to cry. He didn't see the suit. He saw himself. For the first time. And he was finally happy.
It is no wonder that our society relates being our true selves with "coming out of the closet." It's not that people are hiding in there. People are just trying on suits until one feels right, and then there's obviously no reason to stay in there.
I have lived a very privileged life. I've had stress, some sorrow, a bit of drama, but I have never experienced extreme hopelessness. I have had it quite easy. I'm well aware of my privilege and wish everyone else had it as good. And I'm not talking material wealth but pure life-joy. I love being alive. When I see the countless suns in the sky at night, I feel even more privileged that there may not be too many other planets up there circling those suns that have conscious entities looking back in my direction. We're special in our existence alone. Just being alive is meaningful, but then we actually get to do something with it!
What I do share with Jerry DeWitt is regret over wasted time. Our lives are short, so knowing now what we could have known all along is regretful, though we acknowledge its role in who we've become, and we hope we have plenty of time left to catch up. Lines are long and boring at the bank for a reason: that's pondering time. (Don't fritter it away scanning Facebook statuses.)
I was given a religion at birth, but I abandoned it early and my family would soon follow. Most of my life has been religion-free, but the religions of my parents, and most likely their parents, had induced in them habits and ideologies that let me know as a child the people we were supposed to dislike and how much the world was against us. Rather than trying to convince my parents otherwise, I quietly protested in my mind and maintained the status quo. I wore the suit they gave me, but every night, safe in my room, I ripped it off as fast as I could. And so my family saw the person they wanted to see. Two years ago, I burned that suit. I finally felt that I didn't have to wear it anymore. And here is where I relate to Jerry's path.
From the book...
It was not an identity crisis in the traditional meaning where you internally wrestle with who you are, but instead in the sense of feeling as though you can no longer carry the weight of an identity created for you.
and
He had rejected a false identity. I should not take it personally because he never knew me as a person.
A young Jerry DeWitt went on a quest to find himself and just happened to slip into a suit straight from the Goodwill of Pentecostalism, rather than seeking out a tailor and getting measured for some custom threads. When that second-hand, hand-me-down suit got itchy, he tried another slightly different one, adding some borrowed dress shoes to the look.
A friend and mentor saw his pants were hanging a bit long, and his sleeves were a tad short. He noticed in Jerry's grimace that his shoes were too tight. So he gave him the number of a fine tailor. Jerry started small. He bought a nice pair of socks, then a pair of shoes that made his feet sigh. Finally, he went down and got measured properly, and one day his suit arrived. He slipped it on, took a look in the mirror, and started to cry. He didn't see the suit. He saw himself. For the first time. And he was finally happy.
It is no wonder that our society relates being our true selves with "coming out of the closet." It's not that people are hiding in there. People are just trying on suits until one feels right, and then there's obviously no reason to stay in there.
June 15, 2014
I had the pleasure of attending a presentation by Jerry DeWitt last Fall, that was at the end of his book tour promoting, Hope after Faith
. I felt a tad guilty that I hadn't read his book at this point but going to the presentation was a good introduction to this former Pentecostal preacher who had chosen to embrace his skepticism. One of the interesting things about the book, that might frustrate some, is that the bulk of the book chronicles DeWitt's journey from enthusiastic believer through frustrated evangelist and only spends the last couple chapters on his life as a non-believer. So much of the book was about his lifelong efforts to become the evangelist for Christ that he felt he was called to be, that it might be confusing to some, especially given the book’s title. It could be too much church-culture for those looking for some behind-the-scene/dirty-laundry against the church expose. As someone who continues to try to figure out how to integrate my own "church history" to my present journey, I can understand the need DeWitt might have had to spend so much time writing about all the years he spent trying to live up to the calling he felt in his life.
I don't know that the book would help those without any personal experience growing up religious and then openly choosing another path. And as one who has that experience, there's part of me that wonders how the story might have been different had DeWitt had more success as an evangelist. I mean, I don't care who you are, but anyone's faith would be greatly tested if one set the goal to preach the Word as one highest goal but at the same time couldn't afford food, housing, decent transportation or adequate healthcare for ones family. And we're not talking about the extravagance that religious leaders are often accused of committing, but just meeting the basic day-to-day needs.
Anyway, this leads me to believe that however one lands on the God/Atheist question, it's a completely personal question that no one else can decide for you. Those of us on the outside are entitled to our opinion and may work toward supporting each other's desire to have good, decent lives, but on a personal level, we can't tell someone that their experience(s) aren't real. Like any personal relationship, only those on the inside can really say whether it was a mistake or not. It’s just like when a Christian preacher tells me that I can't know what love is unless I'm his or her kind of Christian. Ah, no, you aren’t entitled to validate or invalidate my own emotional experiences. Thus, it goes the other way too. Only the person in it can decide what is good for them and what's not with the understanding that there's often a pretty big gap between our stated intentions and where we continually find ourselves. Coming down with some declaration trying to invalidate another's experiences just creates boundaries and doesn't do anything to help us understand that we're all humans, just trying to make sense of our existence, wanting to have a better experience from what we knew before. DeWitt's book very much communicates the struggles of a young man trying to help the world in the only way he knew and where that journey eventually led him.
. I felt a tad guilty that I hadn't read his book at this point but going to the presentation was a good introduction to this former Pentecostal preacher who had chosen to embrace his skepticism. One of the interesting things about the book, that might frustrate some, is that the bulk of the book chronicles DeWitt's journey from enthusiastic believer through frustrated evangelist and only spends the last couple chapters on his life as a non-believer. So much of the book was about his lifelong efforts to become the evangelist for Christ that he felt he was called to be, that it might be confusing to some, especially given the book’s title. It could be too much church-culture for those looking for some behind-the-scene/dirty-laundry against the church expose. As someone who continues to try to figure out how to integrate my own "church history" to my present journey, I can understand the need DeWitt might have had to spend so much time writing about all the years he spent trying to live up to the calling he felt in his life. I don't know that the book would help those without any personal experience growing up religious and then openly choosing another path. And as one who has that experience, there's part of me that wonders how the story might have been different had DeWitt had more success as an evangelist. I mean, I don't care who you are, but anyone's faith would be greatly tested if one set the goal to preach the Word as one highest goal but at the same time couldn't afford food, housing, decent transportation or adequate healthcare for ones family. And we're not talking about the extravagance that religious leaders are often accused of committing, but just meeting the basic day-to-day needs.
Anyway, this leads me to believe that however one lands on the God/Atheist question, it's a completely personal question that no one else can decide for you. Those of us on the outside are entitled to our opinion and may work toward supporting each other's desire to have good, decent lives, but on a personal level, we can't tell someone that their experience(s) aren't real. Like any personal relationship, only those on the inside can really say whether it was a mistake or not. It’s just like when a Christian preacher tells me that I can't know what love is unless I'm his or her kind of Christian. Ah, no, you aren’t entitled to validate or invalidate my own emotional experiences. Thus, it goes the other way too. Only the person in it can decide what is good for them and what's not with the understanding that there's often a pretty big gap between our stated intentions and where we continually find ourselves. Coming down with some declaration trying to invalidate another's experiences just creates boundaries and doesn't do anything to help us understand that we're all humans, just trying to make sense of our existence, wanting to have a better experience from what we knew before. DeWitt's book very much communicates the struggles of a young man trying to help the world in the only way he knew and where that journey eventually led him.
July 7, 2013
I just completed reading Jerry’s memoir, “Hope After Faith: An Ex-pastor’s Journey From Belief to Atheism. I cannot say that I enjoyed this book; it was not written to be a light read, enjoyable, or refreshing. Jerry transports the reader from his childhood, growing up in a Pentecostal family, to his born-again experience, through what felt like a 25-year period of being tossed by winds with attempts to pick up the pieces of his ministry and family life wherever those winds carried him.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who dares to take a peek behind Oz’s curtain of Christian ministry to glimpse how the secret workings of doctrinal divides and religious politics shape the preacher’s messages and actions, congregations, and affect communities.
Throughout this memoir it becomes clear that Jerry’s cardinal motivation has always been to serve others, and it is my hope that he will find avenues to fulfill this drive to serve among his new community of non-believers.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who dares to take a peek behind Oz’s curtain of Christian ministry to glimpse how the secret workings of doctrinal divides and religious politics shape the preacher’s messages and actions, congregations, and affect communities.
Throughout this memoir it becomes clear that Jerry’s cardinal motivation has always been to serve others, and it is my hope that he will find avenues to fulfill this drive to serve among his new community of non-believers.
August 29, 2013
Hope After Faith is the honest memoir of Jerry DeWitt's journey from Christianity to atheism. His story is well written, and I found myself wanting to know more about the influence of society and culture on his beliefs and life experiences.
However, I could not help but feel DeWitt put God into a box and expected Him to relate in a way that corresponded with his expectations. One can not discount the effects of free will choices and consequences of sin. Because bad things happened does not mean God does not exist. I do hope DeWitt will continue his journey and explore authors like Dinesh D'Souza to expand his knowledge.
I had the opportunity to read this book as the recipient of a Goodreads Giveaway. However I intend to share this book with others because it is a good read .
However, I could not help but feel DeWitt put God into a box and expected Him to relate in a way that corresponded with his expectations. One can not discount the effects of free will choices and consequences of sin. Because bad things happened does not mean God does not exist. I do hope DeWitt will continue his journey and explore authors like Dinesh D'Souza to expand his knowledge.
I had the opportunity to read this book as the recipient of a Goodreads Giveaway. However I intend to share this book with others because it is a good read .
July 20, 2017
As someone who can relate to the story, I desperately wanted to love this book. Alas, it was much like looking forward to a refreshingly cold Coke, only to be handed a room-temperature generic version that couldn't even come close to the Real Thing. Hope After Faith is probably one of the most flat and boring books I've ever read. Save yourself the trouble and leave this one on the shelf.
June 2, 2024
A FORMER PENTECOSTAL PREACHER RECOUNTS HIS JOURNEY TO ATHEISM
Author Jerry DeWitt wrote in the first chapter of this 2013 book how in 1984 he was ‘saved’ at a Pentecostal meeting led by Jimmy Swaggart. His girlfriend told him, “If you’re going to be a church person now… come with US to our church.” (Pg. 22) So he accompanied her to a Baptist church, but eventually decided “that the Baptist faith was simply not for me… The Baptist services I attended lacked the energy, emotion and enthusiasm that I had grown accustomed to and naturally perceive as the deepest expressions of devotion and sincerity… So in the fall of 1986, I returned to my family’s church, the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ… [I] had to slowly reacquaint myself with the ecstatic style of the Pentecostals.” (Pg. 25)
He became an evangelist, only to discover that “ministering was exactly like being in sales… [I realized] just now naïve I was about the BUSINESS of evangelism. I was horrified to learn just how many evangelists were out there… It was a highly competitive market that left little room for a young evangelist.” (Pg. 66) Later, he adds, “I was frustrated that God was unwilling to help me start my own ministry… I believed that I had to encourage my congregation to live a life dedicated to God…” (Pg. 76)
But “I began to question God---if God really does love everyone, why is it so difficult for go to pour out his spirit? Why doesn’t he just do it, make it come to pass?... I began to see a dilemma in the message I was preaching. I preached that everyone should lead a life devoted to God but I also believed that God loves EVERYONE even if they are not devoted to God. Yet just because I loved people as much as I loved God didn’t mean that I could spare everyone from hell. So I wanted God to quickly pour his spirit upon us and bring about a universal revival so that as few people as possible were lost… But if God really loves everyone… why do we have all these hurdles to jump through?... I hated that anybody had to go to hell.” (Pg. 77)
A fellow minister shared with him a cassette tape that espoused the idea of a ‘dual Godhead.’ DeWitt mused, “Brother Goodwin’s view on the Godhead, of course, had nothing to do with the concept of eternal punishment that I had obsessed over for so long. But what Brother Goodwin’s message did for me was cast doubt on the entire Pentecostal worldview, including the concept of eternal punishment. If Pentecostals were wrong about something so important---the Godhead---they maybe they were wrong about EVERYTHING… Brother Goodwin… was also a strong believer in the concepts of both predestination and annihilation, which held that those who were not saved would just cease to exist instead of suffering eternal punishment… Of course, not everyone is saved… which was difficult for me to swallow because I truly believed that God loves everyone.” (Pg. 127-128)
Later, “I realized that there was a side to Jesus… that I was simply out of sync with. If God taught that one should sacrifice his wife or children for faith, then I was more compassionate and humanistic than even Jesus was … In a sense, the problem also lay with me: I had been studying AT the Bible but I had not been studying the Bible itself… But what if the Bible was not divinely inspired? It that was true, my search for the people with the right doctrine was the wrong mission.” (Pg. 159-160)
He recounts, “Brother Pierce’s revival had failed to rekindle the feelings of intimacy with God that I’d felt during my early evangelist days. Now I felt completely disenfranchised from the relationship with God that I had held very dearly… even as I had growing doubts on religion and the Pentecostal tradition, those doubts had no ramifications for Jesus and me personally… With the panic attacks and my subsequent understanding of the effects of the nervous system on my perception of reality, that special, personal relationship with Jesus was finally challenged… I was truly lost and I remember thinking, ‘This is what a lost person must feel like.’” (Pg. 179-180)
Later, “I had been moving away from supernaturalism and toward a moderate, humanistic message of ‘faith is what you do and not what you receive]… Then I realized that even if I steered clear of supernaturalism in my messages, I couldn’t help but create expectations of divine assistance amongst my congregation…. I had to confront life-and-death issues with my congregation that went far beyond praying for an unpaid light bill or repairing a broken relationship.” (Pg. 224)
When a member of his congregation told him of her brother’s serious injury in a motorcycle accident, an asked him to pray for them, he realized, “I could not pray… I struggled to pray because all of the conflicts that had existed inside me about my faith, which I’d temporarily resolved time and time again through my motivation to remain in the ministry suddenly fused into an awareness that there was no God. But I COULD NOT PRAY for NaTosha because I loved her so deeply and could not bear setting her up for the kind of crushing disappointment I’d witnessed … For the very first time, I turned to reason… ‘NaTosha… Your brother is a young man and a strong man. They’re bringing in specialists, so we’re going to just have to wait this out and see what happens.” (Pg. 237-238)
He notes, “I couldn’t continue to fool myself… I’d bounced from denomination to denomination, from a literal Bible interpretation to an embrace of Christianity as metaphor and I’d finally reached the conclusion of that quest: I was looking at an atheist standing there looking in the mirror. It was a painful realization but the next moments literally tore my soul apart. There, in the guest bathroom, I said three final goodbyes to my [deceased] loved ones: my cousin Gary, my grandfather and my father… My journey through faith was done.” (Pg. 238-239)
He recalled hearing about another former Pentecostal preacher turned atheist named Dan Barker, and he called Barker, who told him, “‘I’m encountered a lot of people like you… I’ve helped form a group---would you be interested in joining?’ Dan explained that the group, the Clergy Project, was a safe haven for former clergy… I found myself feeling hopeful again… Through these forums, I thought to myself, I can help people. My life can have hope—and purpose---again.” (Pg. 239-240)
He concludes, “Just because I’m central in my decision-making process doesn’t mean I ignore the needs of others; now, I reflect on the needs of a much smaller group: my loved ones and my community versus the church hierarchy and a supernatural being… Now I could live in a manner that was coherent with the real me… I became saddened by the realization that I had reaped what I had sown thanks to twenty-five years in the ministry… But then I was hopeful. I was just starting to chart a course in my life that was true to me so that twenty-five years from now, I’ll live a life of my own choosing… That’s the hope… Freed from religion, which forces me to sacrifice my own identity and values, my values become my own… By forcing my way to freedom, I’ll set a positive example for the next generation…” (Pg. 259-260)
This book will be of keen interest to those interested in such “deconversion” stories.
Author Jerry DeWitt wrote in the first chapter of this 2013 book how in 1984 he was ‘saved’ at a Pentecostal meeting led by Jimmy Swaggart. His girlfriend told him, “If you’re going to be a church person now… come with US to our church.” (Pg. 22) So he accompanied her to a Baptist church, but eventually decided “that the Baptist faith was simply not for me… The Baptist services I attended lacked the energy, emotion and enthusiasm that I had grown accustomed to and naturally perceive as the deepest expressions of devotion and sincerity… So in the fall of 1986, I returned to my family’s church, the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ… [I] had to slowly reacquaint myself with the ecstatic style of the Pentecostals.” (Pg. 25)
He became an evangelist, only to discover that “ministering was exactly like being in sales… [I realized] just now naïve I was about the BUSINESS of evangelism. I was horrified to learn just how many evangelists were out there… It was a highly competitive market that left little room for a young evangelist.” (Pg. 66) Later, he adds, “I was frustrated that God was unwilling to help me start my own ministry… I believed that I had to encourage my congregation to live a life dedicated to God…” (Pg. 76)
But “I began to question God---if God really does love everyone, why is it so difficult for go to pour out his spirit? Why doesn’t he just do it, make it come to pass?... I began to see a dilemma in the message I was preaching. I preached that everyone should lead a life devoted to God but I also believed that God loves EVERYONE even if they are not devoted to God. Yet just because I loved people as much as I loved God didn’t mean that I could spare everyone from hell. So I wanted God to quickly pour his spirit upon us and bring about a universal revival so that as few people as possible were lost… But if God really loves everyone… why do we have all these hurdles to jump through?... I hated that anybody had to go to hell.” (Pg. 77)
A fellow minister shared with him a cassette tape that espoused the idea of a ‘dual Godhead.’ DeWitt mused, “Brother Goodwin’s view on the Godhead, of course, had nothing to do with the concept of eternal punishment that I had obsessed over for so long. But what Brother Goodwin’s message did for me was cast doubt on the entire Pentecostal worldview, including the concept of eternal punishment. If Pentecostals were wrong about something so important---the Godhead---they maybe they were wrong about EVERYTHING… Brother Goodwin… was also a strong believer in the concepts of both predestination and annihilation, which held that those who were not saved would just cease to exist instead of suffering eternal punishment… Of course, not everyone is saved… which was difficult for me to swallow because I truly believed that God loves everyone.” (Pg. 127-128)
Later, “I realized that there was a side to Jesus… that I was simply out of sync with. If God taught that one should sacrifice his wife or children for faith, then I was more compassionate and humanistic than even Jesus was … In a sense, the problem also lay with me: I had been studying AT the Bible but I had not been studying the Bible itself… But what if the Bible was not divinely inspired? It that was true, my search for the people with the right doctrine was the wrong mission.” (Pg. 159-160)
He recounts, “Brother Pierce’s revival had failed to rekindle the feelings of intimacy with God that I’d felt during my early evangelist days. Now I felt completely disenfranchised from the relationship with God that I had held very dearly… even as I had growing doubts on religion and the Pentecostal tradition, those doubts had no ramifications for Jesus and me personally… With the panic attacks and my subsequent understanding of the effects of the nervous system on my perception of reality, that special, personal relationship with Jesus was finally challenged… I was truly lost and I remember thinking, ‘This is what a lost person must feel like.’” (Pg. 179-180)
Later, “I had been moving away from supernaturalism and toward a moderate, humanistic message of ‘faith is what you do and not what you receive]… Then I realized that even if I steered clear of supernaturalism in my messages, I couldn’t help but create expectations of divine assistance amongst my congregation…. I had to confront life-and-death issues with my congregation that went far beyond praying for an unpaid light bill or repairing a broken relationship.” (Pg. 224)
When a member of his congregation told him of her brother’s serious injury in a motorcycle accident, an asked him to pray for them, he realized, “I could not pray… I struggled to pray because all of the conflicts that had existed inside me about my faith, which I’d temporarily resolved time and time again through my motivation to remain in the ministry suddenly fused into an awareness that there was no God. But I COULD NOT PRAY for NaTosha because I loved her so deeply and could not bear setting her up for the kind of crushing disappointment I’d witnessed … For the very first time, I turned to reason… ‘NaTosha… Your brother is a young man and a strong man. They’re bringing in specialists, so we’re going to just have to wait this out and see what happens.” (Pg. 237-238)
He notes, “I couldn’t continue to fool myself… I’d bounced from denomination to denomination, from a literal Bible interpretation to an embrace of Christianity as metaphor and I’d finally reached the conclusion of that quest: I was looking at an atheist standing there looking in the mirror. It was a painful realization but the next moments literally tore my soul apart. There, in the guest bathroom, I said three final goodbyes to my [deceased] loved ones: my cousin Gary, my grandfather and my father… My journey through faith was done.” (Pg. 238-239)
He recalled hearing about another former Pentecostal preacher turned atheist named Dan Barker, and he called Barker, who told him, “‘I’m encountered a lot of people like you… I’ve helped form a group---would you be interested in joining?’ Dan explained that the group, the Clergy Project, was a safe haven for former clergy… I found myself feeling hopeful again… Through these forums, I thought to myself, I can help people. My life can have hope—and purpose---again.” (Pg. 239-240)
He concludes, “Just because I’m central in my decision-making process doesn’t mean I ignore the needs of others; now, I reflect on the needs of a much smaller group: my loved ones and my community versus the church hierarchy and a supernatural being… Now I could live in a manner that was coherent with the real me… I became saddened by the realization that I had reaped what I had sown thanks to twenty-five years in the ministry… But then I was hopeful. I was just starting to chart a course in my life that was true to me so that twenty-five years from now, I’ll live a life of my own choosing… That’s the hope… Freed from religion, which forces me to sacrifice my own identity and values, my values become my own… By forcing my way to freedom, I’ll set a positive example for the next generation…” (Pg. 259-260)
This book will be of keen interest to those interested in such “deconversion” stories.
July 13, 2013
Jerry reminds me of the statement by a scientist to the effect that all small children are natural scientists, but the adults convince most children to comply with authority. Jerry still took a scientific approach, but tried to use this after accepting the authority of the Bible. He spent much effort looking for "correct doctrine", which reminds me of a comparison between religion and science. Both theists and scientists can agree that correct doctrine is the path to truth. The theist calls his "correct doctrine" a "gospel", while the scientists calls his a "theory". The difference between them is in where the "correct doctrine" comes from. The theist says that the senses are corrupt and not to be trusted, so "correct doctrine" must come from within, e.g., divine inspiration. The scientists totally disagrees with this and asserts that the senses, with allowances for their limitations and instruments to extend them such as microscopes and telescopes, are the final authority on the accuracy of theory (e.g., "correct doctrine"), and thus are what determines the truth. A theory must be logically consistent with itself, and must correlate with experience, and Jerry tried to apply this test to his gospel. After much effort to find a "correct doctrine" in gospel, he concluded that it was just not possible, while scientific theory is demonstrably accurate, openly admitting to its limitations. By contrast, all the different gospels claimed to be the one and only truth. Being an honest man, Jerry was not able to live "in the closet" despite being deep in the bible belt, and so he has suffered discrimination and ostracism. But, he has found new friends and social circles, and with their help, he has found much hope for the future. I am proud to have been a part of the standing ovation for some of Jerry's recent successes.
July 31, 2023
Found out about this guy because of Dan Barker.
Wild to see the many different shades of batshit in Christianity. In the case of Jerry's story, the Pentecostal persuasion. Speaking in tongues, mega church compounds and rockstar preachers. Stuff that would have been absolutely foreign to me when I was a young Christian. Most of what's in this book would have even seemed crazy to me back then, but that's what everyone thinks of any corner of Christianity that isn't their own. "You believe (crazy thing)? That's nuts. You should just believe (equally crazy thing.) like me!" Or also imagining people coming to blows because you believe in calling a magic ghost a different word than someone else.
You won't just get the standard Christian tomfoolery in this, (Although it certainly is present,) but you'll get some really goofy nonsense, like UFOS and magic rocks. The parts about Jerry's time with the followers of William M. Branham were the most interesting and also the saddest. There are so many little splinter groups that exist within Christianity that are downright fascinating when they're cracked open and looked at.
I listened to the audiobook for this, which is read by Jerry DeWitt himself. Very fun to listen to, especially when he slips into his southern preacher voice.
Ultimately, Hope After Faith is a relatable journey of a pastor finding his way out of Christianity. Easy to relate to for me, (Despite not being a preacher,) as his steps out of faith echo my own (and so many others, I'm sure.) Especially turning back to study the history of the Bible and realizing--Uh-oh, this wasn't as simple as I had been led to believe. The story is a fevered search for meaning and eventually finding it in a way you'd never expect. If you liked Dan Barker's Godless (Which I also need to re-read,) then you might enjoy this, too.
Wild to see the many different shades of batshit in Christianity. In the case of Jerry's story, the Pentecostal persuasion. Speaking in tongues, mega church compounds and rockstar preachers. Stuff that would have been absolutely foreign to me when I was a young Christian. Most of what's in this book would have even seemed crazy to me back then, but that's what everyone thinks of any corner of Christianity that isn't their own. "You believe (crazy thing)? That's nuts. You should just believe (equally crazy thing.) like me!" Or also imagining people coming to blows because you believe in calling a magic ghost a different word than someone else.
You won't just get the standard Christian tomfoolery in this, (Although it certainly is present,) but you'll get some really goofy nonsense, like UFOS and magic rocks. The parts about Jerry's time with the followers of William M. Branham were the most interesting and also the saddest. There are so many little splinter groups that exist within Christianity that are downright fascinating when they're cracked open and looked at.
I listened to the audiobook for this, which is read by Jerry DeWitt himself. Very fun to listen to, especially when he slips into his southern preacher voice.
Ultimately, Hope After Faith is a relatable journey of a pastor finding his way out of Christianity. Easy to relate to for me, (Despite not being a preacher,) as his steps out of faith echo my own (and so many others, I'm sure.) Especially turning back to study the history of the Bible and realizing--Uh-oh, this wasn't as simple as I had been led to believe. The story is a fevered search for meaning and eventually finding it in a way you'd never expect. If you liked Dan Barker's Godless (Which I also need to re-read,) then you might enjoy this, too.
July 22, 2014
Much more than just an autobiography of a preacher turned humanist. I liked the book for the following reasons,
1) The listener quickly likes the author because of his obvious sincerity for the search for truth and his love of humanity and therefore it's easy to like the story since you will like the author
2) the book shows how tough it is to be a preacher in the rural south for a sincere believer
3) the backbiting within and between churches and church members is a background character through out.
4) I learned a lot about Pentecostals, their doctrines and their pettiness
5) the author writes the book without using the perfect vision of hindsight and writes the story as if his state of mind at the time was real (such as visions, faith healing and so on)
6) the author presents a step by step guide to his search for the perfect doctrine. His first questioning of his faith comes about after his grandfather passes away and faces eternal damnation just because he didn't embrace the right faith.
7) The author is sincere in his search and we the reader get all of the relevant steps and thought processes he uses in his journey which helps me understand why I believe the way I do
8) The first 2/3 of the book could be listened to by a true believer and she would not be critical at all of the book
9) The author does a marvelous job of reading his book and really adds to the experience with his southern accent and the cadence of a preacher when necessary. They did another thing I liked, whenever a woman was speaking in the story, the narrator would be female.
I found the book one of the most spiritual books I have ever listened to, and it has helped me understand why I believe the way I do and would recommend this audiobook to anyone.
1) The listener quickly likes the author because of his obvious sincerity for the search for truth and his love of humanity and therefore it's easy to like the story since you will like the author
2) the book shows how tough it is to be a preacher in the rural south for a sincere believer
3) the backbiting within and between churches and church members is a background character through out.
4) I learned a lot about Pentecostals, their doctrines and their pettiness
5) the author writes the book without using the perfect vision of hindsight and writes the story as if his state of mind at the time was real (such as visions, faith healing and so on)
6) the author presents a step by step guide to his search for the perfect doctrine. His first questioning of his faith comes about after his grandfather passes away and faces eternal damnation just because he didn't embrace the right faith.
7) The author is sincere in his search and we the reader get all of the relevant steps and thought processes he uses in his journey which helps me understand why I believe the way I do
8) The first 2/3 of the book could be listened to by a true believer and she would not be critical at all of the book
9) The author does a marvelous job of reading his book and really adds to the experience with his southern accent and the cadence of a preacher when necessary. They did another thing I liked, whenever a woman was speaking in the story, the narrator would be female.
I found the book one of the most spiritual books I have ever listened to, and it has helped me understand why I believe the way I do and would recommend this audiobook to anyone.
May 11, 2016
A spiritual memoir about a man who was raised in the Pentecostal church and even became a pastor only to find himself disillusioned with the church. Though I am personally not a fan of organized religion, I do find myself uncomfortable with those who take a mean spirited approach against it. I don't care about others' religion as long as they don't care about my lack of religion, but I still want to read about these things to help sort out my feelings. I appreciated DeWitt's story and felt he did a great job explaining himself without mocking or deriding others for their belief. An interesting read for anyone who tires of the vitriol of the Dawkins and Hitchens of the world.
January 25, 2016
I truly had high hopes for this book. As someone who has struggled with religion/beliefs for many years, I was curious and anxious to get the details of how Mr. DeWitt reached his conclusion that there is no God, and yet until the last few pages of the book, he was still, very much, a believer. I like his approach to humanism, but still felt cheated that I didn't quite "get" his conclusions. I found it a difficult book to finish, but kept hoping it would offer more, so kept reading.
July 24, 2013
This book speaks to the fortitude and intelligence of this man who was able to, entirely on his own, develop the critical thinking skills required to extricate himself from the cult in which he was raised.
November 12, 2013
This book is ok. I enjoyed learning about his process from believer to non but there is something missing. I can't quite put my finger on it. It was a lot of details in the first chapter that was long and sort of boring. I guess I felt like this could have been condensed into a very long article.
September 24, 2024
XXXXX
A PREACHER BECOMES AN ATHEIST
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"After decades of studying religion, I was awakened to the idea that because skepticism was my nature, I had more questions than answers about religion [or religious faith]. [Faith is complete, unquestioning acceptance of something even in the absence of proof and especially, of something not supported by reason.]
I realized that free thought had been the mythology with which I explored my theological questions and that agnosticism [the doctrine that the human mind cannot know if there is a God] was the conclusion to an investigation into the question of religion that spanned twenty-five years.
But what really brought me to atheism--and I believe that atheism is an opinion because the existence of something outside of our reality is neither provable [nor] unproveable--was humanism [any system of thought based on the nature, interests and ideals of humans]. In all my endeavours, from ministry to city hall [the author had a job at city hall until he was FIRED], humanism had been my motivation."
The above quote (in italics) comes from this memoir by Jerry DeWitt (with Ethan Brown). His ministry began when he was seventeen. After twenty-five years as a preacher, including being a pastor of two fundamentalist congregations (he preached for the last time in April 2011], DeWitt became an atheist, writer, and public speaker. (Brown is an author.)
This book does exactly what it says on the front cover. It traces Dewitt's agonizing journey from belief (or faith) to atheism (the doctrine that there is no God or gods; godlessness).
I think the best way to convey the essence of this book is to list the chapter titles:
(1) God loves everyone
(2) God saves everyone
(3) God is in everyone
(4) God is everyone's internal dialogue
(5) GOD IS A DELUSION
I have to give DeWitt a lot of credit. It must of taken tremendous courage to come out as an atheist after being a preacher for quarter of a century. (There were consequences to this action: public ostracism, family-breakup, and financial ruin.)
I want to emphasize that this book, in no way, attempts to convert readers to atheism. For those readers who are already atheists, this book will probably be quite an interesting read.
Finally, I had a couple of problems with this book:
First, I mentioned above that this book was a memoir. Unfortunately, this information is tucked away at the very back of the book. I think it would have been beneficial to have this information at the very front so as to prepare the reader for what is to come.
Second, the first chapter is VERY long (150 pages). I think some of the excessive detail in this chapter could have been removed without affecting the overall story.
In conclusion, this book effectively traces a pastor's tortuous journey from faith to atheism!! I leave you with the author's explanation of the books title:
"By embracing humanism as fully as I once embraced God, [I now know] that there is HOPE AFTER FAITH."
XXXXX
(2013; prologue; 5 chapters; epilogue; main narrative 265 pages, acknowledgements)
XXXXX
A PREACHER BECOMES AN ATHEIST
XXXXX
"After decades of studying religion, I was awakened to the idea that because skepticism was my nature, I had more questions than answers about religion [or religious faith]. [Faith is complete, unquestioning acceptance of something even in the absence of proof and especially, of something not supported by reason.]
I realized that free thought had been the mythology with which I explored my theological questions and that agnosticism [the doctrine that the human mind cannot know if there is a God] was the conclusion to an investigation into the question of religion that spanned twenty-five years.
But what really brought me to atheism--and I believe that atheism is an opinion because the existence of something outside of our reality is neither provable [nor] unproveable--was humanism [any system of thought based on the nature, interests and ideals of humans]. In all my endeavours, from ministry to city hall [the author had a job at city hall until he was FIRED], humanism had been my motivation."
The above quote (in italics) comes from this memoir by Jerry DeWitt (with Ethan Brown). His ministry began when he was seventeen. After twenty-five years as a preacher, including being a pastor of two fundamentalist congregations (he preached for the last time in April 2011], DeWitt became an atheist, writer, and public speaker. (Brown is an author.)
This book does exactly what it says on the front cover. It traces Dewitt's agonizing journey from belief (or faith) to atheism (the doctrine that there is no God or gods; godlessness).
I think the best way to convey the essence of this book is to list the chapter titles:
(1) God loves everyone
(2) God saves everyone
(3) God is in everyone
(4) God is everyone's internal dialogue
(5) GOD IS A DELUSION
I have to give DeWitt a lot of credit. It must of taken tremendous courage to come out as an atheist after being a preacher for quarter of a century. (There were consequences to this action: public ostracism, family-breakup, and financial ruin.)
I want to emphasize that this book, in no way, attempts to convert readers to atheism. For those readers who are already atheists, this book will probably be quite an interesting read.
Finally, I had a couple of problems with this book:
First, I mentioned above that this book was a memoir. Unfortunately, this information is tucked away at the very back of the book. I think it would have been beneficial to have this information at the very front so as to prepare the reader for what is to come.
Second, the first chapter is VERY long (150 pages). I think some of the excessive detail in this chapter could have been removed without affecting the overall story.
In conclusion, this book effectively traces a pastor's tortuous journey from faith to atheism!! I leave you with the author's explanation of the books title:
"By embracing humanism as fully as I once embraced God, [I now know] that there is HOPE AFTER FAITH."
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(2013; prologue; 5 chapters; epilogue; main narrative 265 pages, acknowledgements)
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January 3, 2019
Hope after Faith is a memoir by former-minister-turned-Atheist Jerry DeWitt. Brother DeWitt was just like you and me growing up. He had a strong desire to belong, a desire to be loved, a desire to be included. When he was fifteen he had a strong religious experience at a Mega Church headed by Jimmy Swaggart, some guy that I might have heard of before. His home was inculcated with Bible stuff; his grandmother believed in Faith Healing and the Laying of Hands to help against diseases. As the matriarch of the household, young DeWitt held her in high esteem, but since he didn’t speak in tongues at this thing, he wasn’t truly saved in her eyes. All she had for him was disappointment.
Mr. DeWitt grew up in Southern Louisiana, his father was a drunk that loved to ride motorcycles and shoot guns in the backwoods. When DeWitt was three his father was in a horrific crash and died. His mother remarried and his new father was a Car Salesman. When DeWitt was nine, his mother had another child, but his half-sister was born with Down’s Syndrome. DeWitt grew up to be an awkward teenager who loved reading Carl Sagan and dreamed of being an astronaut. Then he had his experience, as I said and went to different denominations of Church to fill the void he felt in his heart.
Eventually, DeWitt discovered that the whole of his faith was built on a shaky foundation. He couldn’t find the words to comfort one of his flock. He that the Bible was a mass of dueling interests from early church fathers. He found that churches couldn’t answer his questions. Over many years, he finds himself turning to Atheism. As it is a memoir, it focuses a great deal of time on his long and thorny path.
This book had potential, but I can’t give it a higher rating than a 3 out of 5. This is mainly because I really wanted to know how he went and became an Atheist without having to dig through his story. It even has tons of Bible verses, though I suppose I understand that, given that he was a former minister.
Mr. DeWitt grew up in Southern Louisiana, his father was a drunk that loved to ride motorcycles and shoot guns in the backwoods. When DeWitt was three his father was in a horrific crash and died. His mother remarried and his new father was a Car Salesman. When DeWitt was nine, his mother had another child, but his half-sister was born with Down’s Syndrome. DeWitt grew up to be an awkward teenager who loved reading Carl Sagan and dreamed of being an astronaut. Then he had his experience, as I said and went to different denominations of Church to fill the void he felt in his heart.
Eventually, DeWitt discovered that the whole of his faith was built on a shaky foundation. He couldn’t find the words to comfort one of his flock. He that the Bible was a mass of dueling interests from early church fathers. He found that churches couldn’t answer his questions. Over many years, he finds himself turning to Atheism. As it is a memoir, it focuses a great deal of time on his long and thorny path.
This book had potential, but I can’t give it a higher rating than a 3 out of 5. This is mainly because I really wanted to know how he went and became an Atheist without having to dig through his story. It even has tons of Bible verses, though I suppose I understand that, given that he was a former minister.
August 26, 2023
I was extremely disappointed with this book. The description and premise are very misleading. The book is written by a covert narcissist which is clearly seen in every chapter. While the title leads you to believe that a he left his longtime faith and became an atheist, he actually went through several religions as well as cults. Some of these including United Pentecostalism, Branhamites , and Goodwinites (aka Gospel Assembly, Des Moines). He seemed to always be trying to make a name for himself within these organizations while dragging his family along with him. When he isn't elevated to leadership right away or isn't getting enough attention, he jumps ship and finds another religion to join. When you finally reach the end of the book he has been made a into a pawn by the Clergy Project (just another type of cult without the religious aspect IMO.) When it gets back to his community of his involvement with the project he throws a tantrum and claims he was "outed" as an atheist to the locals. He touts how awful religion is and then gets upset when the religious people of his town start to treat him differently and blames it for causing his marriage to end. The whole book shows a lack of maturity of someone who is completely self absorbed.
February 20, 2020
DISCLOSURE: I met the author, and was able to speak with him and get his signature in this book, during event in the fall of 1983 in Philadelphia PA at which he was speaking.
Why it took me over 6 years to finally get around to reading this, I'll never know.
Yes, my journey touched on similar points as his, but I had not been in 'the business' as a pastor as he had. His experiences are not mine, they are his alone, and I appreciate that. I also appreciate that he has shared those experience in this small volume.
It takes a lot of intellectual fortitude to reach the point that he did, from going in to the ministry at the young age as he had (with no formal training, to boot) to then doing the wide ranging research that he relays in this memoir that built on his core value of 'learn everything about the subject'.
I do appreciate one of the statements that he made in the book...
“Skepticism is my nature. Free Thought is my methodology. Agnosticism is my conclusion. Atheism is my opinion. Humanitarianism is my motivation.”
Why it took me over 6 years to finally get around to reading this, I'll never know.
Yes, my journey touched on similar points as his, but I had not been in 'the business' as a pastor as he had. His experiences are not mine, they are his alone, and I appreciate that. I also appreciate that he has shared those experience in this small volume.
It takes a lot of intellectual fortitude to reach the point that he did, from going in to the ministry at the young age as he had (with no formal training, to boot) to then doing the wide ranging research that he relays in this memoir that built on his core value of 'learn everything about the subject'.
I do appreciate one of the statements that he made in the book...
“Skepticism is my nature. Free Thought is my methodology. Agnosticism is my conclusion. Atheism is my opinion. Humanitarianism is my motivation.”
July 24, 2017
I picked up this book after a recommendation by a friend. It sat on my shelf for a few months and I nearly forgot about it. Luckily I did not. Reading through this book was completely mind-blowing. At times it was as if someone had taken excerpts from my own life. I think that many people who read this title would come away with the same feelings as I had. If you want to understand the hardships and the length of time it takes for a minister to give up the faith, I recommend reading this title. Though outwardly it might appear as if the change occurs overnight, the true struggle, for the pastor, has been going on for years, sometimes decades. You would truly be surprised by how many atheist or in the least agnostic ministers there are, standing behind pulpits each Sunday.
Absolutely fantastic read!
Absolutely fantastic read!
April 12, 2023
A great, great book! It takes you through absolute surrender to the supernatural -call me GOD- to liberation through reason and scientifically scrutinized facts. The journey to true knowledge is painful and costly, as well as redemptive and liberating.
It reminded me a lot of Plato's allegory, "The Cave".
This is a very brave man, willing and able to sacrifice everything for the truth and the privilege to be his own real self, and not some comfortably adjusted puppet.
The "good Christians" prosecuted him, thus turning him into a... martyr - life has a delicate sense of humor.
Thank you, Jerry, for carrying the Light and sharing it with all of us inside the cave. Your turbulent journey has not been in vain.
It reminded me a lot of Plato's allegory, "The Cave".
This is a very brave man, willing and able to sacrifice everything for the truth and the privilege to be his own real self, and not some comfortably adjusted puppet.
The "good Christians" prosecuted him, thus turning him into a... martyr - life has a delicate sense of humor.
Thank you, Jerry, for carrying the Light and sharing it with all of us inside the cave. Your turbulent journey has not been in vain.
August 7, 2020
I loved the book overall. We both come from oneness Pentecostalism but baby this book was far too long. Filled with a lot of stuff we didn’t need. The book is called hope after faith but it really doesn’t provide any Hope After Faith. It’s more of a memoir about the author’s journey through Protestant organizations and back to Pentecostalism.
April 30, 2018
Surprisingly well-written. Surprisingly cathartic.
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