Chasing Lilly

by Nealie Rose

Bryan Sawyer, LIVE! with Kelly Top Teacher Award “Chasing Lilly is an eye-opening look into the world of mental illness from the prospective of a parent. Her harrowing tales make it easy to forget that Lilly is a real girl. As an educator, I would recommend this book to anyone who works with individuals with emotional disturbances.” Foster W. Cline, M.D., is an internationally renowned child and adult psychiatrist, as well as co-author of Parenting with Love and Logic. He has served as a consultant to school systems, pupil personnel teams, and hospitals around the “Just quality writing in descriptive, interesting, enticing, and leads me to smile in an understanding way. I have read your fascinating book, Chasing Lilly. I found it to be so enlightening, and hope it becomes a classic reference work for prospective foster and adoptive parents.” William Steele, PsyD, MSW, Founder, The National Institute for Trauma and Loss in Chasing Lilly is “a remarkable, richly detailed journey into what matters most in the lives of severely traumatized children . . . This should be required reading for anyone caring for or treating traumatized children . . . What a wonderful story. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to endorse such a meaningful and insightful work . . .”

Genres: Fostering

292 pages, Paperback

First published December 4, 2014

Reviews

[Teryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

This author did a really good job describing living with a child with extreme needs in a very matter of fact way. She showed humor in the insanity and a determined persistence to show unconditional love in VERY difficult circumstances.

Towards the end It felt a little redundant to me and I found myself skimming a few pages.

While I was reading I couldn’t help thinking many things seemed to me like an actual developmental disability and not only mental illness so I was glad she addressed that later in the book.

I did cry when they finally made the decision they felt was best for the future.

I could tell how much this couple loved their little girl and wanted the best for her.

Nealie, Bruce and Dr. Dan are pretty amazing humans and I’m thankful there are people like them who live in this world.

This book is hopeful even though it’s not a fairy tale. It showed the power of love, not to fix all things that are broken but that it gives us strength to keep going against all odds.

[Stacy Willoughby · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been a behavioral & Theraputic foster parent for 18 years & chasing Lily reminded me of all of my most challenging children, all rolled up into one little girl.
I empathized with the stress on the family, the tough decision making process, how trauma affects all the relationships around you, and never feeling quite like you have done enough.
The unconditional love of this story is amazing. Very well written.

[Gabrielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Engrossing

I fell in love with Lillie, but was also heartbroken at her struggles. Foster parents were amazingly patient and understanding.

[Nathan Gesner · Rating 4 out of 5]

A tragic story with no solution

The book is well written and easy to follow, but it was overall disappointing. The entire book is one story after another of how Lilly acts out. It never changes. Lilly is so out of control that she is eventually placed in permanent residential homes where she continues the same behaviors. The book ends with her still a teenager sucking her thumb, raging, running away. By the end of the book she has learned to control herself in the occasional car ride and is no longer urinating everywhere, but there's otherwise no signs of progress. Most disappointing is that the book demonstrates there's really no solution to children suffering from reactive attachment disorder. As a parent of adopted children, I was hoping for some practical tips on how to deal with these difficult behaviors, but the only solution shared is to lock the child up and hope they eventually grow out of it.