Facing the Facts: The Truth About Sex and You

God's Design for Sex #4

by Stan Jones, Eugene H. Peterson

Designed for children ages 11-14, Facing the Facts equips kids to understand and deal with the changes of puberty. It also examines why God intends sex for marriage, discusses love and dating, and answers tough questions about sexuality.

Genres: Parenting, Family, Health, Christian, Childrens, Religion, Nonfiction

128 pages, Paperback

First published September 1, 1994

Reviews

[Stefani · Rating 3 out of 5]

A nice, Christian perspective teaching reproduction for adolescents. For "regular" school kids, the age range of 11-14 is probably entirely appropriate, but as homeschoolers, I don't think we'll need such a comprehensive book until age 14 or 15.

I only had a problem with one paragraph in the whole book, and while I actually agreed with what it said in the paragraph, I didn't think it needed to be in there. It's the last paragraph in the masturbation section, which basically says: don't wallow in guilt if you occasionally masturbate. I agree--sometimes guilt in this area can cause more problem than the sin itself. (Plus, there are other more pressing issues to worry about!) However, I could also say the same thing about cigarettes... yes, if you smoke occasionally, it's probably nothing to be riddled with guilt over. But what does "occasionally" mean? Once a year? Twice a year? Once a month? Once a week? Once a day? It's that vagueness that causes a problem for starters. And ALSO, both cigarettes and masturbation can lead to a desire for "more" (smoking more frequently, trying other drugs, becoming addicted to cigarettes or drugs or alcohol, etc.; and masturbating more frequently, looking at pornography, becoming addicted to pornography, etc.) As that's the only sticking point, I'll likely still use this book with my children (when they are old enough), but provide more conversation in this area.

[Scott Hayden · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent, straight-forward, yet sensitive.
Written for teens.
Just enough information to satisfy curiosity, but not feed lust.
Solidly biblical.

[Wendy Riley · Rating 2 out of 5]

I purchased this book on the recommendation of my pastor, and started reading it to my 3 children ages 10-14. Boy am I glad I chose to read to them rather than just handing this book over.

It started ok. The first 4 chapters are a very basic explanation of the sexual changes of puberty. The book is recommended for ages 11-14 but written for a prepubescent audience. Children who are actually beginning to experience puberty will need more support and info than what this book provides.

By chapter 5, "How does a woman become pregnant and give birth?", I found I needed to edit significantly. I am a natural fertility and five-time natural birthing mother, so while I'm not a professional, I have plenty of knowledge and experience. Half-truths and completely false comments about fertility, pregnancy, and birth are peppered throughout the chapter. I cannot decide if the author was ignorant or intentionally-fear mongering. I fear the latter because of the chapters that followed.

After reading chapters 6-8, I will be skipping them entirely and finding another resource for my children. This may be the "revised and updated" edition, but not updated enough. It was like I had fallen through a portal back into the heart of mid-nineties, early 2000s purity culture.

In summary, half the book was OK. I would have given 3 stars if it ended after chapter 5.

[Michelle Fournier · Rating 4 out of 5]

Straightforward and direct information. Some basic reproductive system diagrams. This was exactly what I was wanting for our homeschool middle school years book. We have read other books on this topic appropriate for younger years and what to expect in puberty and this was just right for my 7th and 8th graders.
I did not at all care for chapter seven (Love and Dating) and would recommend extra discussion for that chapter. Chapter 8 (Tough issues) also needs a lot of discussion. Really of course the whole book is one you would want to read with your child and discuss but those 2 chapters have some touchy subjects and opinions I wouldn’t want being the only opinions on the topic my child gets/or make sure my child understands what is being discussed.
I really loved (super short) chapter 9 about the importance of owning your choices in life.
Overall though this had a lot of great basic easy to understand information.
And obviously very Christian.

[Anne Snyder · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book. I recommend it for children and adults alike, especially for parents who want a good way to open up the lines of communication with their children about this important topic, and for adults who never had very open conversations about the nature or beauty of sexuality with their parents or other trusted individuals.

This book not only explains sexual design, but also explains that sexual feelings, etc., are something God created and not something shameful. It honestly discusses growing up in the light of being the sexual beings that we are. The book also touches on topics like masturbation, pornography, etc., that might prove to be issues that otherwise seem shameful to approach. It encourages kids that they don't have to be afraid of their sexuality or of talking about it with safe adults.

[Deborah · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a read aloud with your child this book is great, but I wouldn't recommend it as a just hand it to your child, and "here read this!" Some stuff will need clarification in the child's mind from their parent or responsible adult. It's heavy stuff, but well worth the read in today's sex saturated world.

[Shea Fox · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series is the best I have seen on addressing an ongoing conversation with your child about sex from a Biblical worldview. There are 4 different books for ages 3-5, 5-8, 8-11, and 11-14. All of them are well written and thoughtful.

[Stephanie Ziebarth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Although a bit dated at this point, a good book to use as a springboard for discussing matters of sexuality with your children from a biblical perspective. Intended to be used within the series God's Design for Sex.

[Sheri-lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

A bit dated now. A bit simplistic for complicated information in some ways, especially in dealing with interacting with culture. But good if taken as a tool to have conversations with your child about these topics.

[Heather Brazzle · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book aloud to my 14 and 16 year old sons and found myself providing PLENTY of commentary. We have had an ongoing discussion about sexuality since they were 4 and 6 and this book was useful in facilitating the conversation at their current age level.

[Antonio · Rating 1 out of 5]

TERRIBLE book. Do NOT read! Gives garbage, outdated info about LGBT people, and tells you that we're less people because of some 10000 year old book? Don't get me wrong,I'm religious, but still...

[midnightfaerie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is part of a 4 set series of books that are Christian based and talk about sex. I've used all 4 of these with my kids, finally finishing the last one with my oldest so I thought it was time for a review. Loved these. Had no idea how to approach sex and health in today's ever increasing confusing world about what's right and wrong in this area. Each book is for a different age group and while I loosely adhered to these, I chose a time for each child based on their maturity. I'm a homeschooling mom so we set up a health class each week to discuss topics with each child individually and gave them a notebook to write down any questions during the week they might discuss.

In this fourth and final book, it goes through everything it did before in the series, but in more depth. It's designed for the teen who has a good idea what's going on, but might have questions about specifics. There are also charts that are labeled with body parts, showing both the male and female organs, as well as a baby, placenta, and a diagram of giving birth. It talks about love and dating and how to know when you're ready. Overall a great conclusion to the series. Highly recommended.

[A. · Rating 2 out of 5]

From what I have seen... it feels too focused on purity culture. I at least like how they maturely handle LGBTQ, even if they believe it's a sin to be such.

I, myself, am a trans Christian person, so I felt rather... unloved, hopeless, and discouraged from reading those parts though.

They should probably know that gender is not equal to sex 😅

And, to clarify, I pray a lot about my identity, but every single time God gives me a sign that he made me this way — to be an LGBTQ person. I'm always praying that others would realize they, too, are loved for exactly the way God made them.

I'm more of the type of Christian that only follows the New Testament and the 10 Commandments, so I'm probably not the same kind of conservative Protestant people who wrote this book are...

Anyway, I was given this book by my mother, who seems to switch sides on the whole LGBTQ matter every few months, which has brought me a lot of stress, and it seems that this month is one where she doesn't support me :(

I'm probably not explaining this clearly lol

[Karla Osorno · Rating 5 out of 5]

My young teenage daughter and I read this book (book 4 in 4 part series) aloud over a long period of time. It is not the first time we have covered most of the topics, so this served as a reminder and conversation starter. Often we would only read a few pages and talk about things relevant to her (observations, questions, clarifications). Conversations don’t just “come up” so I was grateful to this book to be the trigger. I hope that these foundational conversations will help our ongoing open communications as she matures.

The authors handle the material with sensitivity and biblical conviction. I recommend this series for parents and children with a biblical worldview.

[Carolyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5. I read the most recent edition of the book to review content before giving to my young teenage daughter to read. I informational content was strong and written well for the age/grade it is targeted for. I think some of the application portions can lean fear/shame based which makes me hesitant to hand it over to my daughter without directly addressing the nature of how some of the application portion was communicated. A lot of damage can come from the purity culture messaging and it seemed like there was still some of the leaning sprinkled throughout the book. Would still recommend as a solid resource but with caution.

[Sheresa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ok, so this is a series of 4 books, written for different ages of kids. They're actually really well done, I think. Explains everything very matter of factly, and from a Christian perspective. It answers common questions, explains what every thing is and how it works; pressures they might face, and things to think about as they consider how they would handle them. Reasons why or why not; risks/consequences and benefits. It's a pretty good series, I think, and if nothing else will be an invitation for conversation for parents and children.

[Brittany · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good resource for Christian parents and teens. I especially thought the chapter on tough problems was well done. If the book is ever updated again, I would hope to see another option for girls on their period is a menstrual cup.

[Laura · Rating 2 out of 5]

Maybe a 2.5 on both of these. Both are clearly in need of an update, and both have many good things to be said but also things I don’t like about them. They give me good place to start thinking about a book that I could write for a religious audience that was relevant to kids today!

[Joelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is just the next level version of the third book. It’s more detailed sex, body, and puberty education. I like the approach—takes it seriously, but keeps proper perspective about all of it.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent series!

[Daniel Kleven · Rating 5 out of 5]

The 4th and final book in the series God's Design for Sex, intended for kids age 11–14. Also, winner of a Christian Book Award.

[Goldberry · Rating 1 out of 5]

Promise me you'll explain to your child what the clitoris is better than this series does.