The Jim-Jams

by Michael Green

BLUE TURTLE ISLAND IS CRAWLING WITH THINGS TO DO—IF THE JIMJAMS DON'T DO YOU IN FIRST.

Duffy Farris and his wife Rose have dream jobs managing the exotic Blue Turtle Island resort. Duffy is a man dedicated to extremes of leisure and pleasure; fortunately his work allows him to mix paradise, rounds of golf, and his quest for the ultimate high. But he's not hallucinating when he stumbles upon his first jimjam, a wide-eyed, inquisitive little creature that throws him way off par. And he's pretty straight when he finds its home, a pulsing, yawning orb that Duffy can't resist... and that threatens to transform Blue Turtle Island into a satanic sandbox.

Even as the boat unloads another weekend's worth of mild-mannered retirees, the jimjams are scurrying to work, biting, sucking, and planting their seeds of insane, burning desire. It will require all the arthritic strength of guests like Earl Douchette and his wife, Anna, to outrun the swarm—to escape a fate far worse than growing old. And in addition to the jimjams, they must battle the increasing ranks of their human minions, whose hunger—and desire—won't be satisfied by paradise alone...

Genres: Horror

256 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published April 1, 1994

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. See this thread for more information.

Michael Green is a successful computer consultant and professional speaker. Author of two humorous books and one called Successful Speechmaking, he has also won many speechmaking competitions. Spending some of his time in the UK, some in New Zealand and some on the water on his yacht, he has been working on the sequel to Bloodline

Reviews

[Jack Tripper · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perfect for when you're in the mood for an insane and disgusting tale of body horror featuring a bunch of parasitic, alien bug-like creatures that take over a resort island, infecting the elderly vacationers and turning them into...something else. Something revolting and deranged and murderous. Too bad they're all pretty much trapped there.

Also perfect for when you're in the mood for very detailed old people sex.

But seriously though. I'm not joking.

Pure and utter trash. Recommended.

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Duffy and Rose Farris have the awesome job of managing the Blue Turtle island resort, catering to retired folks. One day, while looking for their dog, Duffy stumbles across a large... hive of some sort. What pours out of the opening is some strange, unknown creature, that looks like a "cross between a spider and a bony red frog... with wings." The strange bugs act as parasites, and Duffy is the perfect host. As a matter of fact, so is Rose. And all the guests too. As the novel progresses, more and more bugs, of all different sorts appear throughout the island, infecting everyone they can, as the guests fight to survive.

The only thing that bothered me was there was not really any explanation. What are the bugs? Where do they come from? Why do they want a host (what was their reason for infecting Duffy)?
There were some scenes/descriptions of the bugs infecting people that were nauseating nightmare fuel, so I definitely enjoyed that. Even though I was left with questions, I couldn't give this book anything less than 5 stars. The cover alone is worth that many, in my opinion. Also, it's so unique, it gets points for that. All in all, this book is pretty rare, but it's worth it to pick up a copy, if you can find one.

[Steven Schreier · Rating 5 out of 5]

Seriously, I can not believe I am the only person to review this masterpiece of insanity. Worth the price of admission for the cover art alone ( and a travesty that you will have to take my word for it as it is not available here). This guy should have been heralded as the next Clive Barker.

[Nate Dawg · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pheweee!! I surely got the jim jams, goosebumps and the willies while reading this nasty story by Michael Green. The cover drew me in and I began searching for this unique and hard to find book. Turtle Island is a resort for older adults to have a weekend getaway. This weekend is disrupted by a Lovecraftian alien invasion. A lot of insect and bloody body horror is in this book.
4 💀’s

[Charles Schneider · Rating 4 out of 5]

Spectacularly repulsive and hilarious insect body horror meets senior citizens. From cover art to the surreal, almost Wm. S. Burroughs level psychotically colorful monstrous vision of it all...for what it strove to be, and for ability to elicit often stunned wincing from the reader...it is perfect.

[Adrian Hughes · Rating 1 out of 5]

I burned this book in a pie pan in my bathtub on the last day of my lease. The building filled with smoke. I didn't explain or tell anyone what I burned.

[Jay Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 / 5
This story is crazy as hell! If you like creature features, body horror, and some dark comedy tossed in, you need to track this down!

First half of the book is a lot of build up and character development, which dragged in a couple parts. The second half is full throttle, though. Absolutely a wild ride!

[Alan Zelaya · Rating 5 out of 5]

So, at least a few other people have read this disturbing little novel.
It's every bit as good as described by Mr. Schrier.

Into a trashy, if harmless, little life (the lazy drug addict who's the super), into the vacations of mostly old people looking for a little rest (who have some fire in them yet), onto a sunny tropical island resort, comes something as cold, as alien, as indifferent, as anything in Lovecraft.

Green is a lot less verbose than Lovecraft, though.

[Justin Green]

The author information is incorrect...

[Jack · Rating 3 out of 5]

This gets close to the delirious bug-filled heights of “The Nest”, but also like “The Nest” this completely whiffs the ending. There’s a lot of unique and gross body horror imagery here, but it never really goes anywhere. The afflicted resort caretakers mutate/deteriorate into parasite-ridden flesh monsters and then… that’s it. This builds up as if it’s going to have some kind of nutso climax but it fizzles out in the last thirty pages. You mean to tell me that the giant bug monster could be taken out by a gun? That’s rather anticlimactic. Also for as inventive as the bug monsters are, there’s no rhyme or reason to anything, but in a way that doesn’t feel wholly intentional. I don’t necessarily need to know where the bugs came from, but at a certain point you need narrative justification for throwing weird stuff at the wall.
The setup is great, the characters are charming enough, but it just doesn’t build to a satisfying climax. Also the weird head-bug creature on the cover is featured in the story but then doesn’t end up doing anything. Again, don’t just throw in a weird visual and not elaborate on it! But hey, at least the monster on the cover actually showed up at all. That’s more than I can say for a lot of horror paperbacks!

[Alondra · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is out of the genres that I usually read. BUT a friend of mine gave it to me (I was lucky since it is out of print) and I was so into it. It is gory, disgusting and suspenseful. All you can expect from a vacation in an island infested with weird bugs that are always on the look for the next prey. It was a really WEIRD book but I was satisfied.

Also, the picture of the author and the info that Goodreads has for this book IS WRONG! I know the author and he is not from the UK.

[James · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fucking LOVE this book! Full of blood, guts, body-transformations, shuffleboard, cum, feeding tubes, and tons of adorable insects. It's a perfect candidate to be adapted into a practical effects-laden, over-the-top gore flick.

[Signor Mambrino · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was good. Quite strange. Very gooey. Yuck, but also good.

[Lee Fehr · Rating 4 out of 5]

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