"I'm doing the right thing, not feeding myself. It's the only thing I can do, so I will do it. Gloria can somehow have the energy I don't take in, and it will help her stay alive."
Twenty years ago, fourteen-year-old Valerie rushed off for lunch with her boyfriend instead of properly putting away a packet of balloons, and her little brother choked to death on his third birthday. In response, Valerie locked down every aspect of her life so she could never lose control like that again, and she's still doing that today.
So when her sister Gloria is found comatose after an apparently random attack, Valerie is desperate to do something, anything, to save her only remaining sibling. But as a financial controller for a "nothing bigger than a size six" fashion designer, she has no medical background and no idea of how to help. But she simply must find a way.
Since Gloria has always wanted to be a size zero, Valerie hits on food as the answer: she will eat less, lose the weight Gloria now can't, and somehow save her sister that way. But when "eating less" turns into a frantic starvation diet to reach size zero before Gloria dies, will Valerie's self control save her sister or destroy her own life?
I am a natural 1200 wpm speed reader and the author of twenty-three self-published novels including the free ebook "Life, Love, and a Polar Bear Tattoo" which has had over 400,000 downloads.
In my spare time, I read, run, swim, crochet, take care of my cat Pearl, and play drums and clarinet. Generally not all at once.
I only record books here if I absolutely love them and hugely recommend them. I definitely read more than you see here. :)
WOW! This book was a moving tale of everything that Valerie did to escape her battle with survivor's guilt. What a different (and heavy) topic to touch on, which left me wanting to keep reading. The subtle touches of romance added flavor to the main story line. The most important reminder is that until someone realizes they need help, all help offered will go through one ear and out the other.
I received a free copy of this book and voluntarily chose to review.
I was given an ARC of this book for an honest review.
I have read all of Ms Wardell's books and loved them all. She writes strong female characters, many of them having trials in their lives they've had to overcome. Valerie is one or her most neurotic characters by far. This is a very well written story of an addictive personality, brought on by a life altering event that happened when she was a teenager. At times the story was almost too brutally honest, a truly stark look into the mind of someone who's life spirals out of control the more she tries to assert control onto the chaos that surrounds her.
I did not consider this to be light reading, this was a dark look into humanity for me, I could feel Valerie's pain. I think many of us have had periods in our life when we have felt alone, that there is no one who cares about us, that our life is out of control and we're hanging on by the tips of our fingers. Valerie doesn't have any friends, her choice, because you can't lose anyone if you're not close to anyone. Will she find someone who cares about in her in time to save her from herself? You'll have to read the story to find out?
How many of us try to make a bargain with God? “If you do this one thing for me, I will do that thing for you”. This is exactly what Valerie tries to do to save her sister, Gloria. Gloria is the victim of an accidental head injury, which has put her into a coma. Valerie wants to help. She needs to right the wrong done in her brother’s death, 20 years prior. But, she feels guilty and helpless. The problem lies in that she doesn’t really know her sister. They have been practically strangers for the last 20 years. She doesn’t want her parents to lose another child. She thinks of a way to save her. Her sister had said many times while they were growing up that she wished she could be a size 0. Valerie decides that becoming a size 0 will help her sister. The bargain is if I become a size 0, Gloria will recover.
While staying with her at the hospital, Valerie meets Gloria’s best friend. The two become fast friends themselves, and through him she learns about her sister. In finally getting to know her sister, she finds out the truth: the truth behind bargains, the truth behind what lead to her sister’s coma, and eventually the truth about her brother’s death.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I loved this book just as I have loved all of her books. Holding Out For a Zero kept me up late at nights as I didn’t want to stop reading. The way she tells the story and how real she makes the characters seem, all make for great reading. I feel like I’m treating myself every time I read her books. And reading them is a wonderful treat, and the best part about this treat is that it has ZERO calories
After a terrible mistake years before that resulted in her brother’s death, Valerie has tried to take complete control of her life. When her sister, Gloria, is comatose after a random attack, Valerie is bothered because she cannot control what is happening. Valerie knows her sister Gloria always wanted to be a size zero, so decides that, by becoming a size zero herself, Valerie is doing all she can to save Gloria. However, Valerie ends up in a mad dash to lose the weight and become a size zero before Gloria dies.
As I read this book, I wondered whether I would eventually like Valerie, since she is so not likable from the start. However, as the book progresses, the author gives the reader a better understanding of who Valerie really is and why she is the way she is, so I began to understand, if not sort of like, her better. I found learning more and more about her both helpful and interesting to this end. Ms. Wardell has done an excellent job developing her character. She provides a good example of someone, who learned to control everything about her life, whose life is spiraling out of control. Additionally, I now have a better understand of eating disorders and how they take over one’s life as well as how they affect an individual’s and everyone else’s lives once they take hold. This is definitely not a “light” book, as it delves into serious and pertinent subjects in a thoughtful and well done manner. I think anyone looking for a good, solid read will enjoy this book, while learning some things about things that are and are not in one’s control, how one can “pay tribute” to things that are occurring in one’s life, even if they are not all that great, and eating disorders. I received this from the author to read and review.
I have been reading Heather's books for awhile now and I can honestly say that this is one of her best books yet. It was extremely emotional. Valerie is a total control freak, who needs every aspect of her life under her complete control. This way in her mind she can make up for her younger brother's tragic death that happened on his third birthday. So when her sister Gloria is the victim of a random assault one night ending up in the hospital, Valerie again seeks the control that she needs to get through the situation emotionally. She decides that she is going to lose weight for her sister as well as her job. Even though she succeeds, she has to come to terms with not being able to control everything in her life.
This story is one of courage and bravery. The courage to acknowledge and overcome her control issues that lead to her eating disorder. This book is so realistic and shows us how out of control we can get without us knowing it.
As with Heather's other characters, she always gives us strong females battling some kind of emotional trauma and drama. Her characters are real honest and sometimes dark. But, they always make us think while giving us a great book to read as a bonus. You will love this book and the insight it gives us into eating disorders as well as control issues.
This was a heartbreaking look at eating disorders, and how trying to be in control can slide into complete out-of-control behaviour. That slide was so gradual that it didn't seem like a big deal, until you compared the current result with the beginning, and then it became horrendous.
I tend to love this author's works for their realism, and this was no exception. Valerie may not have been the nicest person, but she was very real and very believable. Her internal thoughts made sense, and it was easy to understand her actions. It doesn't matter than they got so unbelievably self-destructive because that's the way reality works.
The story took a hard look at eating disorders, and the pressures society and other women put on women to be a certain size and weight. It was heartbreaking and discouraging. (Side note: my personal rebellion was to eat maple meringue cookies while reading this, like a dozen... or two.)
There were some high points to the story, and some sweetness, but this was a darker feeling book than the others I've read from the author. This wasn't the easiest read emotionally, but it was well worth devoting my day to it.
**My thanks to the author for providing an advance copy for me to read.
I was provided a pre-publication copy of this book for review purposes.
I absolutely love Heather Wardell's books and was excited to read this book and even more excited to get to read it before many other people. Unfortunately it was not my favorite book. Some of my rationale may have been the storyline. The concept of "Holding Out for Zero" is a little uncomfortable to me. As a medical professional, it bothers me that it took so long for there to be a sincere intervention by her family, friends, and coworkers. Some of these people noticed Valerie's diet and made subtle attempts to "help." The likely reason for the lack of intervention was Valerie's personality, I just wish that there were more attempts by her acquaintances to crack Valerie's bubble.
Another reason why this book was not my favorite is that I felt like some of the characters were not as fleshed out as Heather Wardell's characters in the past. I never felt like I really knew her sister, her parents, and some of her friends. It would have been nice to have a flashback by them to the day of the accident or the day that they met Valerie.
Overall the book was well written and the storyline was engaging. Maybe Heather will write a sequel so we can get better understanding of some of the characters.
Is the constant theme which flows through Heather Wardell’s latest Holding out for a Zero.
Please note I received an Advanced Reader copy in exchange for an honest review.
The story follows the main character, Valerie, having suffered a devastating loss years prior having evolved into a uber-control freak. Everything from her personal life (weight), career (promotion) and relationships with her family are not deemed as variables but elements which she believes she can control.
When she has to face yet another family tragedy, Valerie resorts to works for her – she attempts to take control. And this is where the skill of Heather Wardell kicks in, you are not only a witness to Valerie’s journey but you feel her every frustration, her joy and her humbling defeats.
This story is will take you on a roller coaster emotional ride which, at times, will have you screaming at the characters (I’m looking at you Valerie). This realistic portrayal of someone who doesn’t have all the answers, who stumbles as much as she triumphs, provides a refreshing ring of truth for a main character who are too often portrayed as Hollywood perfection.
Buckle up your seat belt and prepare yourself for the ride.
Thank you NetGalley for the ARC copy of Holding Out for a Zero by Heather Wardell that I was able to read and review. I really had a problem with this book because I did not like the main character or the message her boss was sending to her employees about body image. So from the start I had a negative attitude about the book so I did not give it the attention I probably should have. Then the stupid idea Valerie gets that if she stops eating she can help her sister who is in a coma is idiotic beyond words and her diet plan is just stupid and dangerous. I could not deal with her logic in how starving herself was going to save her sister. To me it was a selfish move to keep her job deep down. Overall, the message of this book can be taken one of two ways. One they can try this stupid diet or two then can see what the author really means depending on how they want to take it. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people out there who want to be zeros so they may take this book the wrong way and that is one of the reasons I am rating it as I am. I am giving this book three out of five stars.
First of all I would like to thank Heather for sending in this ARC for an honest review. I took my time, but it was all worth it.
Being familiar with the style of writing, I was really glad to see her effortless way of narrating a story based on a concept that is quite a part and parcel of our society. The beautiful way in which the author has captured the essence of Eating Disorders and the struggles that are often seen and endured is something that will appreciated by all those who women who have often been faced the remark: 'you are not good enough' just because of size. The characterisation of Valerie with compulsions and acute neurosis will definitely strike a chord; you will hate her for shallow self, but she will persevere to make a place in your heart.
I loved the title for how how aptly it describes the main plot and idea os size zero. But I felt the cover fell short in reaching the same impact.
My opinion: I loved the book mainly because of the concept of Eating Disorder and the way the plot and the idea gives a more depth to the character of Valerie.
Wardell does it again in her latest book Holding out for a Zero. Her characters come to life, and you can relate to their feelings, anxieties and internal battles. In Holding out for a Zero, the main character Valerie strives to keep control in her life by managing numbers and keeping others at bay. The deeply rooted desire for control comes from a tragedy in her past - if she doesn't let people get close, she can't get hurt, and she can't hurt them. But when she nearly loses her sister, her desire for control goes into overdrive, and with seemingly no other option, she ties her ability to control her diet as a way to help her sister. She realizes it's not logical, but it's the way she can cope with the situation. Read on to find out if she's successful in her attempts at control of if all becomes unraveled as time ticks on ... I was given an early copy of this book for an honest review. Hardell's books are a great light read to escape everyday life.
I love Heather Wardell books. This book is about a woman who works in the fashion industry in New York (new locale for Heather) in an admin job. When her sister is hurt in a random attack, Valerie, who is estranged from her whole family, finds her life shifting as she tries to control her weight going from a size 6 to a size zero with a fad diet -- hoping this control will somehow help save her sister's life. Along the way, Heather develops the story and the characters so that you understand how the family got to this point and why Valerie is so controlled. Heather's books don't really have a happy ending -- more of the start toward a resolution. I did receive an advance reader copy of this book, but have also purchased a copy myself. Definitely recommend this book as well as any other Heather Wardell.
I have read most of Heather Wardell's books, but thoroughly enjoyed Holding Out for a Zero as one of my favorites. There are aspects of the main character, Valerie, that I think all women have felt: the struggle to maintain control while balancing family, a career, and a personal life. During parts of the book, you truly want to dislike Valerie for things she says or does, but in the end, you feel a true compassion for her. Valerie is one of the darker main characters out of all of Heather's books, but I think she also feels like one of the most real. While few go through struggles as large as Valerie's, I think we can all relate to parts of her story.
I honestly could not put this book down once I began reading. I definitely recommend picking it up.
I voluntarily read an advanced reader copy of this book, in exchange for an honest review.
Let me begin by stating that I am a fan of Heather Wardell and I voluntarily reviewed an advanced reader copy of this book. Holding Out for a Zero is the story of Valerie, a woman whose determination to control every aspect of her life spins out of control. When her sister is left in a coma after being attacked, Valerie can only think of one way to control the situation. Valerie convinces herself that Gloria will recover if she diets until she becomes the size zero that Gloria has always wanted to be.
For Valerie, the more she tries to control things, the more her life unravels and takes a toll on her health and her job. Her journey ultimately leads her to realize that some things in life are beyond your control no matter what. I enjoyed this story very much and appreciated Wardell’s insight into the fashion world as well as the effects of anorexia.
There are books that are really difficult to read and this one is one of those. It talks about forgiving yourself, but also about a real struggle in today's society: anorexia.
Following the descent into hell of the main character in a false hope of saving her injured sister is painful. What is even more is that she shows no sign of stopping. She's far too gone in her path of deep control over her life.
This book is troubling me because it is everything I am fighting against put into one deep and painful story. In the end, there is hope but I am left with this strange feeling I cannot shake off. Talking about the ending, don't expect a happy ending in the 'they get married and have lots of kids' kind of ending, but one that is realistic. It's not happy, it's not sad, it just is.
Painful story but enlightening.
*book received via Netgalley for an honest review*
This book was full of heartbreak and courage. Valerie a control freak from the age of 14, can't control her sister's coma. So what does she do? She decides if she reaches the size 0 her sister will survive. This is a harrowing tale of guilt, trying to take control, and an eating disorder. I have read all of Heather Wardell's books and enjoyed them all. This book was emotional and uplifting. All of Heather's books have a real heroine that improves or tries to improve herself in the novel. I love that in her previous books we have seen glimpses of past heroines and how they continue to grow. I am hopeful that Valerie will be seen again if this New York set book becomes a series.
Holding out for a zero is an intense and emotional story about how life events and our perceptions of them can take control of our lives. Valerie's journey begins when her little brother dies and circumstances look like she was to blame for his death. Thinking if she can keep tight control in all areas of her life nothing bad like that can happen again. But when she loses a promotion at work then her sister is violently assaulted, her need to control gets skewed by connecting her eating with saving her sisters life. This is well written and leaves us breathless at times.
Heather Wardell did it again! Every time I pick up one of her books, I already know I'm going to love it. And this book was no exception. At first I thought I knew where this story was going, but there were so many twists and turns that I was often caught off guard. I don't think this one was my favorite book of hers, but I still really enjoyed it - mostly because of how I didn't usually know what to expect and what was going to happen next.
Thanks to Heather for the free copy in exchange for an honest review.
I voluntarily reviewed an advanced reader copy of this book.
I've read every book by this author and this one might be my new favorite! Wardell does such a good job developing her characters and making them relatable. I'm glad she shed light on the not often talked about subject of eating disorders, even if it was uncomfortable to read at times. I enjoyed that she could evoke an emotional response from me. That's good writing!
Heather Wardell is one of my favorite authors of all time and this book is another winner. I read a lot of fantasy / sci fi / dystopia / etc. etc. but Heather's books are just so real. They take place in the real world and could easily be true stories - that is what I absolutely love. I highly recommend this book!
I voluntarily reviewed an advanced reader copy of this book.