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Plezier on demand
n 'Plezier on demand' schrijft Chade-Meng Tan dat je maar 15 seconden per dag nodig hebt om meer plezier, succes en rust te ervaren. Vergeet uren, dagen en jaren mediteren! Dit aan de hand van het programma 'verstandige luiheid'. Het programma is gebaseerd op drie pijlers; innerlijke rust, inzicht en geluk. Met praktische tips om toe te passen in het dagelijks leven.
Plezier gaat vooraf aan geluk. Plezier is een voorwaarde om vriendschappen te sluiten en samen te werken. Het is de bron van creativiteit en innovatie. Meer plezier betekent meer succes. Iedereen heeft een aangeboren vermogen om plezier te hebben. Chade-Meng Tan laat zien hoe je door mindfulness dat vermogen aanboort. Hoe meer je oefent, des te sneller het gaat. De meeste mensen zijn zich hier niet van bewust, maar het is werkelijk mogelijk om je geluk naar een hoger plan te tillen.
Plezier gaat vooraf aan geluk. Plezier is een voorwaarde om vriendschappen te sluiten en samen te werken. Het is de bron van creativiteit en innovatie. Meer plezier betekent meer succes. Iedereen heeft een aangeboren vermogen om plezier te hebben. Chade-Meng Tan laat zien hoe je door mindfulness dat vermogen aanboort. Hoe meer je oefent, des te sneller het gaat. De meeste mensen zijn zich hier niet van bewust, maar het is werkelijk mogelijk om je geluk naar een hoger plan te tillen.
256 pages, Paperback
First published May 31, 2016
1408 people are currently reading
4939 people want to read
About the author
Chade-Meng Tan
6 books201 followersChade-Meng Tan (Meng) is Google's Jolly Good Fellow (which nobody can deny). Meng was one of Google's earliest engineers. Among many other things, he helped build Google's first mobile search service, and headed the team that kept a vigilant eye on Google's search quality. His current job description is, "Enlighten minds, open hearts, create world peace".
Outside of Google, Meng is the Founder and (Jolly Good) President of the Tan Teo Charitable Foundation, a small foundation dedicated to promoting Peace, Liberty and Enlightenment in the world. He is a Founding Patron of Stanford University's Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE). He is also a Founding Patron of the World Peace Festival, and adviser to a number of technology start-ups.
Meng earned his MS in Computer Science from the University of California at Santa Barbara. He went to Santa Barbara mainly for the beach, but didn't mind the graduate degree either. He considers himself a Buddhist "on most weekdays, especially Mondays". He is an avid meditator, because meditation facilitates in him inner peace and happiness "without doing real work". Meng occasionally finds himself featured on newspapers. He was featured on the front page of the New York Times and delivered a TED talk at the United Nations. He has met three United States Presidents, Obama, Clinton and Carter. The Dalai Lama gave him a hug for his 40th birthday. His personal motto is, "Life is too important to be taken seriously".
Meng hopes to see every workplace in the world become a drinking fountain for happiness and enlightenment. When Meng grows up, he wants to save the world, and have lots of fun and laughter doing it. He feels if something is no laughing matter, it is probably not worth doing.
Outside of Google, Meng is the Founder and (Jolly Good) President of the Tan Teo Charitable Foundation, a small foundation dedicated to promoting Peace, Liberty and Enlightenment in the world. He is a Founding Patron of Stanford University's Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE). He is also a Founding Patron of the World Peace Festival, and adviser to a number of technology start-ups.
Meng earned his MS in Computer Science from the University of California at Santa Barbara. He went to Santa Barbara mainly for the beach, but didn't mind the graduate degree either. He considers himself a Buddhist "on most weekdays, especially Mondays". He is an avid meditator, because meditation facilitates in him inner peace and happiness "without doing real work". Meng occasionally finds himself featured on newspapers. He was featured on the front page of the New York Times and delivered a TED talk at the United Nations. He has met three United States Presidents, Obama, Clinton and Carter. The Dalai Lama gave him a hug for his 40th birthday. His personal motto is, "Life is too important to be taken seriously".
Meng hopes to see every workplace in the world become a drinking fountain for happiness and enlightenment. When Meng grows up, he wants to save the world, and have lots of fun and laughter doing it. He feels if something is no laughing matter, it is probably not worth doing.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 232 reviews
August 4, 2016
I enjoyed Tan's earlier book, Search Inside Yourself, and so was excited to hear that he had released a new book. To me, Joy on Demand is even better. Maybe it's because as a novice at mediation, Joy on Demand is a wonderful guide on how to access joy from within by training to ease (claiming the mind), incline (learning to be mindful of joy in yourself, your life and the world) and uplift (cultivating loving kindness, compassion and altruistic joy) the mind. Applying these skills can also teach us how to better handle emotional pain and still be able to access joy despite any difficulties we may be having with life. Through practicing Calm-abiding (Samantha), Insight (Vipassana) and Brahmahihara (subline states), we can learn to embody inner peace, inner joy and compassion and reduce suffering.
March 14, 2017
Books like this are really hard for me to read. If I would've been reading the physical copy, I can all but guarantee I wouldn't have finished it. I think I get into this 'betterment of Allie' attitude, buy/download a book, and then after a few chapters I start talking myself out of it. Fortunately, I listened to parts of this with my 10 year old son, and he wanted to hear more. Good thing!
It's obvious that the author has a completely different mind path than I do, which is good and bad. I really did try to take on his enthusiasm of life, and I've been trying to see things differently. But one thing I don't think I'll ever get past is my relationship with death. In one of his examples of how we can find joy, he said that every morning he tells himself that everyone he sees that day will eventually die -- meaning, be nice while you can. Sorry, but that actually brings me the opposite of joy, and fast. I can understand why he would use that example, but my brain doesn't cope with that.
All in all, it was a good book. I learned a few techniques that I've already been using, but I've yet to try meditation. I still think that I'll just fall asleep, although he addressed that in the book, so maybe something stuck in my brain. Hopefully!
It's obvious that the author has a completely different mind path than I do, which is good and bad. I really did try to take on his enthusiasm of life, and I've been trying to see things differently. But one thing I don't think I'll ever get past is my relationship with death. In one of his examples of how we can find joy, he said that every morning he tells himself that everyone he sees that day will eventually die -- meaning, be nice while you can. Sorry, but that actually brings me the opposite of joy, and fast. I can understand why he would use that example, but my brain doesn't cope with that.
All in all, it was a good book. I learned a few techniques that I've already been using, but I've yet to try meditation. I still think that I'll just fall asleep, although he addressed that in the book, so maybe something stuck in my brain. Hopefully!
December 2, 2019
This book was not giving me much joy. I tried the ebook and the audiobook but neither version was really doing it for me... too much detail, not a great choice of narrator, it felt like the whole thing was at least 40% filler which could have been and should have been edited out. Good suggestions for meditation, but geez were they buried deep in the clutter.
January 24, 2020
Summary: A great book on meditation that may work really well for those that are less interested in mind calming and more interested in Joy. I love that he speaks to the idea that meditation is difficult and why. This is often misunderstood.
To celebrate my three months of meditation and because I needed a break and a shorter read, I chose this one today for 100-day challenge. It is more in line with the values I have about the craft and what I think is often confused.
A lot of people think if you sit and cannot calm the mind then you failed and meditation is not for you. That would be like if you went out and ran a marathon and you failed to do so first time out you failed. It's a ridiculous notion.
What I like about Tan is he gives a lot of great examples on how to achieve your goals. But the point is to have a goal and I think those that speak to focus and mind calming are not always getting to the end state. The end state should be more like this, a happy joyful life.
In Tan's view, he's thinking to try to access that joyfulness often. And that leads down the road of meditation. I dig. Here are my notes:
p. 23 - "For when you choose to access joy on demand...the effects go far beyond isolated moments of joy. Joy can improve every aspect of life. It resets happiness points, turning miserable people into jolly ones." His point is you got to learn to access joy.
p. 25 - Clarity of mind is clarity of emotion.
p. 31 - Creativity comes in a relaxed mind. He says that's alpha waves. There are other books that do speak to this better in my list on sleep also delta, theta, but that's not the point of this book, so I didn't remove anything.
p. 51 - "Taking advantage of major opportunities often requires completely letting go of something safe and comfortable and venturing into a deeply uncomfortable unknown. Doing so takes two things: "the self-confidence to put yourself in very uncomfortable situations, and the self-awareness to clearly know your values, priorities, and purpose of life."
p. 67" To be regretful you have to be in the past and to worry, you need to be in the future. Hence when you are fully in the present you are temporarily free from regret and worry."
p. 110 - The idea is to become very familiar with joy.
p. 119 - 3 types of joy (pamojja piti sukha) - Gladness, uplifting joy, wholesome joy. i'd almost translate this into Self-Excited Joy, Contagious Joy, and Compassionate Joy
p. 136 - Self as a process not as an object. It is not permanent.
p. 149 - The temporal nature of joy and all emotions.
p. 154 - Compassion is the highest vibrational state -.45
p. 190 - Pain in joyfulness. Hard, but very possible.
p. 222 - Effortlessness is hard. That's where we're going.
p.230 - Getting to the point where there is no observer, there is only observation.
I dig this book. It's a more earthly practical look at meditation.
To celebrate my three months of meditation and because I needed a break and a shorter read, I chose this one today for 100-day challenge. It is more in line with the values I have about the craft and what I think is often confused.
A lot of people think if you sit and cannot calm the mind then you failed and meditation is not for you. That would be like if you went out and ran a marathon and you failed to do so first time out you failed. It's a ridiculous notion.
What I like about Tan is he gives a lot of great examples on how to achieve your goals. But the point is to have a goal and I think those that speak to focus and mind calming are not always getting to the end state. The end state should be more like this, a happy joyful life.
In Tan's view, he's thinking to try to access that joyfulness often. And that leads down the road of meditation. I dig. Here are my notes:
p. 23 - "For when you choose to access joy on demand...the effects go far beyond isolated moments of joy. Joy can improve every aspect of life. It resets happiness points, turning miserable people into jolly ones." His point is you got to learn to access joy.
p. 25 - Clarity of mind is clarity of emotion.
p. 31 - Creativity comes in a relaxed mind. He says that's alpha waves. There are other books that do speak to this better in my list on sleep also delta, theta, but that's not the point of this book, so I didn't remove anything.
p. 51 - "Taking advantage of major opportunities often requires completely letting go of something safe and comfortable and venturing into a deeply uncomfortable unknown. Doing so takes two things: "the self-confidence to put yourself in very uncomfortable situations, and the self-awareness to clearly know your values, priorities, and purpose of life."
p. 67" To be regretful you have to be in the past and to worry, you need to be in the future. Hence when you are fully in the present you are temporarily free from regret and worry."
p. 110 - The idea is to become very familiar with joy.
p. 119 - 3 types of joy (pamojja piti sukha) - Gladness, uplifting joy, wholesome joy. i'd almost translate this into Self-Excited Joy, Contagious Joy, and Compassionate Joy
p. 136 - Self as a process not as an object. It is not permanent.
p. 149 - The temporal nature of joy and all emotions.
p. 154 - Compassion is the highest vibrational state -.45
p. 190 - Pain in joyfulness. Hard, but very possible.
p. 222 - Effortlessness is hard. That's where we're going.
p.230 - Getting to the point where there is no observer, there is only observation.
I dig this book. It's a more earthly practical look at meditation.
April 22, 2017
Another great book on how to calm your mind and bring in compassion through meditation. Lot of good ideas on how to practice "letting go"
February 2, 2018
Cool concept that I'd like to learn, but the author spent too much of the book trying to convince us that joy on demand is possible and giving examples of people that have achieved it, and not enough on how to actually do it!
January 30, 2021
Summary:
After a year and two months of fairly consistent practice (3.7k minutes of practice on the Waling Up app, 61 hours), I finally read/listened to a book on meditation.
The greatest impression from this book was simply that meditation is deep and vast, and there are plenty of ways to grow in the practice. As a practical takeaway, I’ll use the relaxation versus focus/energy.
Major Highlights:
The equivalent of bicep curls to fitness is meditation to happiness.
Wealth is a personality multiplier (be wary of becoming successful before you’re happy)
The paradoxical ego: the size of a grain of sand while also the size of a mountain. Respectively, focus on humor (I am the least qualified to offer) and service (I have something to offer)
Meditation isn’t about not having thoughts or suppressing them, but about letting it settle itself on its own terms.
Skillful meditation involves three factors: mental relaxation, cultivating mental energy, and equanimous watching.
If you notice too much tension, apply mental relaxation. If you notice you become sleepy, apply mental energy. The key is in the watching.
The story of the puppy (mind): 5 stages
Like the slope of a mountain perfectly inclined to let water run downward, the properly inclined mind can experience peace and joy effortlessly.
Noticing joy is like noticing blue cars - it’s always there. And the more you pay attention to it, the more you’ll be inclined to notice it.
The joy of blamelessness. I have done an ethical thing; my conscience is clear; I am happy. Then attend to your joy and savor it.
Some day I will die, every moment is precious. Some day everyone I love will die, every moment with them is precious.
Just note gone.
Self is not an object but a process
Practice: every hour wish for two people to be happy.
Take joy and delight in YOUR altruistic acts.
The default states of the mind are peace and joy.
Notes:
Your happiness set-point is largely genetic, but it can be changed
9:15 - The equivalent of bicep curls to fitness is meditation to happiness. Mindfulness is paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.
Introduction: The practice involves (1) easing, (2) inclining, and (3) uplifting.
~27:00 - Joy leads to happiness, and happiness to success.
~29:00 - Wealth is a personality multiplier (and experience multiplier). So being successful before you’re happy can inflict great unhappiness. So also, success can multiply your happiness.
~0:55:00 - Correlation between alpha waves (present in relaxed states) and creativity. The mind is more creative when relaxed, that comes in warm showers, strolls and especially meditation.
1:02:00 - The difference between confidence and cockiness. Why does confidence come from meditation? Three wholesome sources of confidence: knowing, equanimity, and resilience.
~1:13:00 - You can simultaneously have your ego be the size of a mountain and have it be the size of a grain of sand. How? By focusing on service (I do have something to offer) and humor (I am the least qualified to offer it).
~1:35:00 - The joy/peace-point where the practice of meditation helps compound joy/peace which helps make you want to practice more.
~2:01:00 - Practice 1: One Mindful Breath (gentleness and intensity, like staring at your child)
~2:14:00 - Use queues to take mindful breaths, like waking up, lying down, every hour chime, and every time you wait
2:37:00 - Practice (simultaneously alert and relaxed) 5min: 1min of anchoring (focus on the breath or sight), 1min of resting (there is nothing to do for this moment), 1min of being (just sit and experience the present moment), 2min of freestyle. Choose the settling-of-the-mind method you enjoy the most.
2:43:45 - You cannot settle the mind, the mind settles itself. Like a snow globe just resting. (Although this analogy doesn’t convey that the brain can settle itself more quickly with practice - the process of familiarization.)
2:47:00 - Meditation isn’t about not having thoughts or suppressing them, but about letting it settle itself on its own terms. It’s not what you think or don’t think; it’s what the mind chooses that day.
2:51:00 - Skillful meditation involves three factors: mental relaxation, cultivating mental energy, and equanimous watching.
2:52:00 - If you notice too much tension, apply mental relaxation. If you notice you become sleepy, apply mental energy. The key is in the watching.
2:54:00 - The story of the puppy (mind): (1) relax - watch the puppy wander but don’t let it go too far from you sitting at the tree (breath), (2) rejoice - you have a puppy, (3) resolve - gently but firmly train the growing dog, (4) refine - , and (5) release - . 1 and 2 cover relaxation, 3 and 4 cover mental energy, and 5 equanimous watching. It’s like a stretching exercise - spend two minutes in each stage.
Keep your relaxation, from there you can add intensity (or gamify it). It’s a skillful effort of joyful relaxation and skillful effort. Ease into joy.
3:11:00 - Like the slope of a mountain perfectly inclined to let water run downward, the properly inclined mind can experience peace and joy effortlessly.
To incline toward something involves familiarity with it.
The difference between noticing and attending to something.
Noticing joy is like noticing blue cars - it’s always there. And the more you pay attention to it, the more you’ll be inclined to notice it.
~3:30:00 - Joy reinforces meditation; and meditation to joy.
3:32:00 - The joy of blamelessness. I have done an ethical thing; my conscience is clear; I am happy. Then attend to your joy and savor it.
3:39:00 - Doubling: the mind cant tell the difference between the present and a memory, so relive happy memories.
3:41:30 - Overcoming habituation by (1) beginners mind, (2) practicing gratefulness, and (3)
A master meditator can choose to not habituate to a sound, beginner’s mind
3:47:40 - Some day I will die, every moment is precious. Some day everyone I love will die, every moment with them is precious.
3:52:00 - The joy of temporary freedom from pain (the freedom to be free from pain is much greater than the freedom to do things). Noticing the absence of something is unnatural.
3:55:20 - Notice the absence of emotional or mental pain as well as the absence of physical pain. Am I experiencing anger, jealousy, grief, fear? Then attend to any joy that arises.
3:57:00 - Just note gone. Upon noticing something, notice when it’s over.
4:01:20 - Whatever is subject to origination is subject to cessation. Every thing has three points: origination, presence, and cessation.
4:02:20 - Self is not an object but a process
4:12:00 - Uplifting the mind with joy through: loving kindness, compassion, and altruistic joy.
4:15:40 - Practice: every hour wish for two people to be happy. This is just a thinking exercise. The happiness ray gun.
4:23:00 - The difference between loving kindness (wishing happiness for self and others) and compassion (wishing self and others to be free from suffering.
4:25:00 - Since compassion involves looking at suffering directly (and can therefore bring up fear)
~4:50:00 - Take joy and delight in YOUR altruistic acts. Acknowledge and feel the joy of your act, your goodness.
Altruistic joy is the most difficult to cultivate.
4:53:23 - Brahma Vihara (four immeasurables, four sublime states): loving-kindness, compassion, altruistic joy and equanimity
4:53:30 - Equanimity is the mind that remains calm and free in the presence of 8 worldly conditions: gain and loss, honor and dishonor, praise and blame, pleasure and pain.
4:55:00 - Begin with loving-kindness.
4:56:40 - People strong in loving-kindness are highly likable by others and even animals. And it cultivated heightened state of meditation.
5:05:23 - Equanimity sees and cares, unlike disengagement (which doesn’t see and can’t care) or apathy (which sees but doesn’t care).
5:22:00 - The default states of the mind are peace and joy. The clouds of anger or sadness just hide what is always present.
6:21:54 - Sailboat analogy: Effortlessness often needs to be preceded by deliberate effort and the main role of effortfulness is to enable effortlessness.
The author was able to focus on the breath without missing a single one, then he plateaued. When asking a Zen master how to grow from here, he said that now effort was mastered, he needed to release effort, let go.
~6:42:00 - How much suffering is created as a result of the belief in me being a self? By having the eventual ability to dissociate from the self, you significantly reduce your suffering.
7:59:00 - Establish the joyful mind (in Japanese this means the old mind), the caring mind, and the great mind (the mind of freedom)
7:01:00 - it’s not about becoming more creative or about x, but about reducing suffering. Peace is the beginning of the end of all suffering.
7:01:40 - Become strong in all three pillars of meditation: samata, vipasana, and brama vihara. Master one of them.
After a year and two months of fairly consistent practice (3.7k minutes of practice on the Waling Up app, 61 hours), I finally read/listened to a book on meditation.
The greatest impression from this book was simply that meditation is deep and vast, and there are plenty of ways to grow in the practice. As a practical takeaway, I’ll use the relaxation versus focus/energy.
Major Highlights:
The equivalent of bicep curls to fitness is meditation to happiness.
Wealth is a personality multiplier (be wary of becoming successful before you’re happy)
The paradoxical ego: the size of a grain of sand while also the size of a mountain. Respectively, focus on humor (I am the least qualified to offer) and service (I have something to offer)
Meditation isn’t about not having thoughts or suppressing them, but about letting it settle itself on its own terms.
Skillful meditation involves three factors: mental relaxation, cultivating mental energy, and equanimous watching.
If you notice too much tension, apply mental relaxation. If you notice you become sleepy, apply mental energy. The key is in the watching.
The story of the puppy (mind): 5 stages
Like the slope of a mountain perfectly inclined to let water run downward, the properly inclined mind can experience peace and joy effortlessly.
Noticing joy is like noticing blue cars - it’s always there. And the more you pay attention to it, the more you’ll be inclined to notice it.
The joy of blamelessness. I have done an ethical thing; my conscience is clear; I am happy. Then attend to your joy and savor it.
Some day I will die, every moment is precious. Some day everyone I love will die, every moment with them is precious.
Just note gone.
Self is not an object but a process
Practice: every hour wish for two people to be happy.
Take joy and delight in YOUR altruistic acts.
The default states of the mind are peace and joy.
Notes:
Your happiness set-point is largely genetic, but it can be changed
9:15 - The equivalent of bicep curls to fitness is meditation to happiness. Mindfulness is paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.
Introduction: The practice involves (1) easing, (2) inclining, and (3) uplifting.
~27:00 - Joy leads to happiness, and happiness to success.
~29:00 - Wealth is a personality multiplier (and experience multiplier). So being successful before you’re happy can inflict great unhappiness. So also, success can multiply your happiness.
~0:55:00 - Correlation between alpha waves (present in relaxed states) and creativity. The mind is more creative when relaxed, that comes in warm showers, strolls and especially meditation.
1:02:00 - The difference between confidence and cockiness. Why does confidence come from meditation? Three wholesome sources of confidence: knowing, equanimity, and resilience.
~1:13:00 - You can simultaneously have your ego be the size of a mountain and have it be the size of a grain of sand. How? By focusing on service (I do have something to offer) and humor (I am the least qualified to offer it).
~1:35:00 - The joy/peace-point where the practice of meditation helps compound joy/peace which helps make you want to practice more.
~2:01:00 - Practice 1: One Mindful Breath (gentleness and intensity, like staring at your child)
~2:14:00 - Use queues to take mindful breaths, like waking up, lying down, every hour chime, and every time you wait
2:37:00 - Practice (simultaneously alert and relaxed) 5min: 1min of anchoring (focus on the breath or sight), 1min of resting (there is nothing to do for this moment), 1min of being (just sit and experience the present moment), 2min of freestyle. Choose the settling-of-the-mind method you enjoy the most.
2:43:45 - You cannot settle the mind, the mind settles itself. Like a snow globe just resting. (Although this analogy doesn’t convey that the brain can settle itself more quickly with practice - the process of familiarization.)
2:47:00 - Meditation isn’t about not having thoughts or suppressing them, but about letting it settle itself on its own terms. It’s not what you think or don’t think; it’s what the mind chooses that day.
2:51:00 - Skillful meditation involves three factors: mental relaxation, cultivating mental energy, and equanimous watching.
2:52:00 - If you notice too much tension, apply mental relaxation. If you notice you become sleepy, apply mental energy. The key is in the watching.
2:54:00 - The story of the puppy (mind): (1) relax - watch the puppy wander but don’t let it go too far from you sitting at the tree (breath), (2) rejoice - you have a puppy, (3) resolve - gently but firmly train the growing dog, (4) refine - , and (5) release - . 1 and 2 cover relaxation, 3 and 4 cover mental energy, and 5 equanimous watching. It’s like a stretching exercise - spend two minutes in each stage.
Keep your relaxation, from there you can add intensity (or gamify it). It’s a skillful effort of joyful relaxation and skillful effort. Ease into joy.
3:11:00 - Like the slope of a mountain perfectly inclined to let water run downward, the properly inclined mind can experience peace and joy effortlessly.
To incline toward something involves familiarity with it.
The difference between noticing and attending to something.
Noticing joy is like noticing blue cars - it’s always there. And the more you pay attention to it, the more you’ll be inclined to notice it.
~3:30:00 - Joy reinforces meditation; and meditation to joy.
3:32:00 - The joy of blamelessness. I have done an ethical thing; my conscience is clear; I am happy. Then attend to your joy and savor it.
3:39:00 - Doubling: the mind cant tell the difference between the present and a memory, so relive happy memories.
3:41:30 - Overcoming habituation by (1) beginners mind, (2) practicing gratefulness, and (3)
A master meditator can choose to not habituate to a sound, beginner’s mind
3:47:40 - Some day I will die, every moment is precious. Some day everyone I love will die, every moment with them is precious.
3:52:00 - The joy of temporary freedom from pain (the freedom to be free from pain is much greater than the freedom to do things). Noticing the absence of something is unnatural.
3:55:20 - Notice the absence of emotional or mental pain as well as the absence of physical pain. Am I experiencing anger, jealousy, grief, fear? Then attend to any joy that arises.
3:57:00 - Just note gone. Upon noticing something, notice when it’s over.
4:01:20 - Whatever is subject to origination is subject to cessation. Every thing has three points: origination, presence, and cessation.
4:02:20 - Self is not an object but a process
4:12:00 - Uplifting the mind with joy through: loving kindness, compassion, and altruistic joy.
4:15:40 - Practice: every hour wish for two people to be happy. This is just a thinking exercise. The happiness ray gun.
4:23:00 - The difference between loving kindness (wishing happiness for self and others) and compassion (wishing self and others to be free from suffering.
4:25:00 - Since compassion involves looking at suffering directly (and can therefore bring up fear)
~4:50:00 - Take joy and delight in YOUR altruistic acts. Acknowledge and feel the joy of your act, your goodness.
Altruistic joy is the most difficult to cultivate.
4:53:23 - Brahma Vihara (four immeasurables, four sublime states): loving-kindness, compassion, altruistic joy and equanimity
4:53:30 - Equanimity is the mind that remains calm and free in the presence of 8 worldly conditions: gain and loss, honor and dishonor, praise and blame, pleasure and pain.
4:55:00 - Begin with loving-kindness.
4:56:40 - People strong in loving-kindness are highly likable by others and even animals. And it cultivated heightened state of meditation.
5:05:23 - Equanimity sees and cares, unlike disengagement (which doesn’t see and can’t care) or apathy (which sees but doesn’t care).
5:22:00 - The default states of the mind are peace and joy. The clouds of anger or sadness just hide what is always present.
6:21:54 - Sailboat analogy: Effortlessness often needs to be preceded by deliberate effort and the main role of effortfulness is to enable effortlessness.
The author was able to focus on the breath without missing a single one, then he plateaued. When asking a Zen master how to grow from here, he said that now effort was mastered, he needed to release effort, let go.
~6:42:00 - How much suffering is created as a result of the belief in me being a self? By having the eventual ability to dissociate from the self, you significantly reduce your suffering.
7:59:00 - Establish the joyful mind (in Japanese this means the old mind), the caring mind, and the great mind (the mind of freedom)
7:01:00 - it’s not about becoming more creative or about x, but about reducing suffering. Peace is the beginning of the end of all suffering.
7:01:40 - Become strong in all three pillars of meditation: samata, vipasana, and brama vihara. Master one of them.
October 31, 2017
I've been redoubling my efforts to manage my anxiety through more natural means as the amount of anti-anxiety meds I was on had me feeling a bit flat and drugged-out. One of the methods I employ for anxiety control is meditation, but I sometimes have trouble finding resources that aren't a bit out there and New Age-y for my taste, or tied to a particular religious tradition. This book was lovely, because although Chade-Meng Tan came to meditation through Buddhism, he takes a very accessible, humorous and step-by-step approach to learning to meditate for joy.
I'm not new to meditation, but I still gained a lot from this book. I loved that he recommended to start with one conscious deep breath every day, because that is something that is possible on my busiest, most stressful days and I've noticed it really does help!
I'm not new to meditation, but I still gained a lot from this book. I loved that he recommended to start with one conscious deep breath every day, because that is something that is possible on my busiest, most stressful days and I've noticed it really does help!
August 6, 2016
2rd book by Meng, one of my fav author about meditation. Meng is one of those early Google engineers and NYT bestselling author. He has an interesting way of putting an abstract subject like mediation, mindfulness, emotional intelligence and compassion, and turn them into a practical and measurable practices, and also in a funny way! This book is a step by step on cultivating joy and meditation!
June 16, 2023
If you're looking to find joy, don't read this book and definitely don't read this review.
75% of this book was just trying to convince you that joy on demand is even possible, and the rest just trying to convince you on why you should meditate to achieve this. This is what I'd expect from the introduction of the book, not the whole 250 pages. For a book so short it really shouldn't feel so long.
Another thing was that the writing style was just PAINFUL. The author seemed to just ramble on and on for forever about things that really could have just been a sentence or too. I feel like this book really could have just been stripped down to an article or bulleted list without losing any relevant content. He goes from story to story to analogy and back to story again, all for one small point and none of which that was interesting.
Throughout the book the author almost came across as braggy and self-centered. He kept talking about how he got the nickname Jolly Good Fellow and how cool that was, which was fine the first time. He also kept talking about his job as an engineer at google and just how absolutely cool it was and on and on again about all the cool stuff he does. For how much of an emphasis there is on going beyond self, this book really had a lot of himself shoved into it.
He was also insensitive throughout the whole book, but mostly from that I'd just say don't read this book if you're mentally ill. This book is meant for people that already have a little joy in their lives and not for people who just struggle to even make it through the day. The author claimed he knew meditating worked because he used to be miserable his whole life growing up and kept alluding to how he got out of it the whole book, only to finally say that the joy had been there the whole time and that he just had to recognize it. Which, no hate to him, is an entirely valid experience but isn't really relevant for people who struggle with mental health, and was kind of frustrating to hear. Towards the end of the book he also brought up how writer friends of his and him had talked about how writing a book is kind of like having a baby. Which is just, not true. maybe as a rule of thumb just don't say that and definitely don't put it down in a book that you publish.
Not to say this book didn't have any good parts, I actually believe there were some good advice for when it comes to meditating and some of the interesting benefits, it was just buried under the rest of the nonsense so I didn't get to appreciate it as much as I wanted to. I was also excited to read this book, I like meditating and I like to practice mindfulness, but this book mostly just felt like it was trying to convince me to do something I already do, not how to approach it in a more joyful and open way.
75% of this book was just trying to convince you that joy on demand is even possible, and the rest just trying to convince you on why you should meditate to achieve this. This is what I'd expect from the introduction of the book, not the whole 250 pages. For a book so short it really shouldn't feel so long.
Another thing was that the writing style was just PAINFUL. The author seemed to just ramble on and on for forever about things that really could have just been a sentence or too. I feel like this book really could have just been stripped down to an article or bulleted list without losing any relevant content. He goes from story to story to analogy and back to story again, all for one small point and none of which that was interesting.
Throughout the book the author almost came across as braggy and self-centered. He kept talking about how he got the nickname Jolly Good Fellow and how cool that was, which was fine the first time. He also kept talking about his job as an engineer at google and just how absolutely cool it was and on and on again about all the cool stuff he does. For how much of an emphasis there is on going beyond self, this book really had a lot of himself shoved into it.
He was also insensitive throughout the whole book, but mostly from that I'd just say don't read this book if you're mentally ill. This book is meant for people that already have a little joy in their lives and not for people who just struggle to even make it through the day. The author claimed he knew meditating worked because he used to be miserable his whole life growing up and kept alluding to how he got out of it the whole book, only to finally say that the joy had been there the whole time and that he just had to recognize it. Which, no hate to him, is an entirely valid experience but isn't really relevant for people who struggle with mental health, and was kind of frustrating to hear. Towards the end of the book he also brought up how writer friends of his and him had talked about how writing a book is kind of like having a baby. Which is just, not true. maybe as a rule of thumb just don't say that and definitely don't put it down in a book that you publish.
Not to say this book didn't have any good parts, I actually believe there were some good advice for when it comes to meditating and some of the interesting benefits, it was just buried under the rest of the nonsense so I didn't get to appreciate it as much as I wanted to. I was also excited to read this book, I like meditating and I like to practice mindfulness, but this book mostly just felt like it was trying to convince me to do something I already do, not how to approach it in a more joyful and open way.
October 12, 2016
To truly be finished with the book, I would have had to integrate his learning into my life and I have failed at that so far. However, this is a great introduction into meditation- very encouraging, interesting, personal and fun.
April 24, 2019
One of the most “approachable” books on meditation. Chade Meng Tan has a talent for making meditation doable for even the busiest and most overwhelmed of us. Enjoyable both in book as well as audio version. If you have time for just one book, make it this one.
January 23, 2018
The most impactful book I've read in a long time. A way to start meditating with mindful breaths and attending to joy. I plan on starting it again very soon.
July 17, 2021
Years ago I remember reading a blog post that talked about learning to savor thin slices of joy, those small moments of taking a first sip of coffee in the morning or smelling the morning air or the feeling of a hug. I loved that idea so much. And the blog post mentioned this book, so I added it to my to-read list and finally got around to reading it.
And it did not provide even a thin slice of joy. Bummer. Clearly the idea of thin slices is the best thing to come out of this book and even then, you really don't need to read it to understand that idea.
There is a scene in the book where the author admits that he decided he wouldn't write the book; it needed to write itself. And that one day, within a minute or two, suddenly the entire layout and content came to him. I don't want to be too critical, but maybe a bit more thought would have been a better approach. The content is a mess. There are far too many references to google and his wealth and the wealth of everyone around him in silicon valley, in a very bragging way. For claiming to offer a secular version of meditation, every chapter is laden with references to buddhism, but on the flip side, not enough to actually teach you anything about buddhism. It is thus both too much and too little to be useful.
I suppose in the end, I just can't figure out who the intended audience of this book is. For anyone at all familiar with meditation, it offers nothing and instead just frustrates with the format and bragging. For anyone new to meditation, it overwhelms with random ideas that are absolutely irrelevant.
Skip this one.
And it did not provide even a thin slice of joy. Bummer. Clearly the idea of thin slices is the best thing to come out of this book and even then, you really don't need to read it to understand that idea.
There is a scene in the book where the author admits that he decided he wouldn't write the book; it needed to write itself. And that one day, within a minute or two, suddenly the entire layout and content came to him. I don't want to be too critical, but maybe a bit more thought would have been a better approach. The content is a mess. There are far too many references to google and his wealth and the wealth of everyone around him in silicon valley, in a very bragging way. For claiming to offer a secular version of meditation, every chapter is laden with references to buddhism, but on the flip side, not enough to actually teach you anything about buddhism. It is thus both too much and too little to be useful.
I suppose in the end, I just can't figure out who the intended audience of this book is. For anyone at all familiar with meditation, it offers nothing and instead just frustrates with the format and bragging. For anyone new to meditation, it overwhelms with random ideas that are absolutely irrelevant.
Skip this one.
November 3, 2017
I read this book with a biased mindset: thinking I wouldn't get much out of it since I already knew enough about meditation, and I didn't like how the title sounded. But I was still curious to see how the author approached it. It turned out I enjoyed reading it a lot. Somehow he's able to take something that can be very abstract and use plain language to explain it, with humour to drive home his points. I really appreciated the additional layer of storytelling, research and anecdotes to what I already knew about meditation.
Reading this book has made me enthusiastic about deepening my practice as he was able to illustrate in detail and precision, the benefits of meditation. There is also this persistent ambiguity about meditation because meditation teachers tend to somehow be overly-cryptic and zen, but Meng was able to bring forth clarity by using stories and also by posing his own questions to meditation masters, and then distilling their answers.
I took one star away because I am not sure how I feel about the over-emphasis on joy, or that the mind's default state is joy. In my opinion peace is what that matters more, and one can be peaceful without joy but with equanimous acceptance.
Reading this book has made me enthusiastic about deepening my practice as he was able to illustrate in detail and precision, the benefits of meditation. There is also this persistent ambiguity about meditation because meditation teachers tend to somehow be overly-cryptic and zen, but Meng was able to bring forth clarity by using stories and also by posing his own questions to meditation masters, and then distilling their answers.
I took one star away because I am not sure how I feel about the over-emphasis on joy, or that the mind's default state is joy. In my opinion peace is what that matters more, and one can be peaceful without joy but with equanimous acceptance.
December 18, 2023
I have been following (online) the work of Chade-Meng Tan at Google for a while and him being a top performance engineer interested in meditation created in me the naive idea that me too, by being a meditation practitioner could improve my chances as a mediocre software engineer.
Well, I did not become the top engineer I was expecting to be, but I can say that, thanks to meditation, do not care about that as much anymore (since I figured the well known mantra - no self, no problem).
Meng deconstructs for us geeks the meditative process and its benefits in a way only a true master geek could do.
There's not really much for me to say about this book given the high calibre of the well known people that have publicly praised the work except to I agree with the recommendations and that I truly believe meditation works.
Great book - thanks for the author for being a reference for all of us geeks looking for nirvana!
Well, I did not become the top engineer I was expecting to be, but I can say that, thanks to meditation, do not care about that as much anymore (since I figured the well known mantra - no self, no problem).
Meng deconstructs for us geeks the meditative process and its benefits in a way only a true master geek could do.
There's not really much for me to say about this book given the high calibre of the well known people that have publicly praised the work except to I agree with the recommendations and that I truly believe meditation works.
Great book - thanks for the author for being a reference for all of us geeks looking for nirvana!
December 27, 2019
What a book! I am thoroughly inspired. I feel that I finally understand many reasons behind some of the standard meditation practices I already knew (but always more or less resisted). The easy examples and informal practices were really good and helpful, my only regret is that since I wanted to read this as a book, I didn’t pause to do the formal practices as well. I loved the witty humor and the funny illustrations, they really appealed to my engineer side by keeping the book very much down-to-earth.
March 17, 2021
I like his simple and humerous writing style.
Tells a simple story with some great angles on life.
There is alot about meditation which is fine, but some things do become repetative.
But the story and teachings overall is a good one and as I said he writes in a way that did make me laugh from time to time. And this was on a serious matter of mental training and meditation
Tells a simple story with some great angles on life.
There is alot about meditation which is fine, but some things do become repetative.
But the story and teachings overall is a good one and as I said he writes in a way that did make me laugh from time to time. And this was on a serious matter of mental training and meditation
April 15, 2019
This book was very helpful to me since I often get stressed out. It teaches you how to change your state by your thoughts and breathing. Author taught classes at Google. Visited zen buddhists, etc. to learn conditions of inner peace and compassion. He has a good TED talk, too.
August 30, 2020
I absolutely loved reading this book. As mentioned in all its reviews, it is a really good starting point for someone who is exploring the art of meditation. I found it especially useful, as I have been trying to meditate everyday for the last two months. The examples that Meng presents are easy to understand and so are his formal practice sessions.
I also think as our practice evolves, this book can offer us new insights each time.
I also think as our practice evolves, this book can offer us new insights each time.
October 28, 2019
Joy is a highly trainable skill. One happy moment at the time.
September 2, 2021
Полезная книга, но читать трудновато. Ещё и рисунки дурацкие постоянно раздражали.
November 16, 2021
Great!
January 19, 2025
Unlocked a lot of joyful moments for me in my day to day. Even doing 10% of what this book mentions helps a lot!
May 18, 2023
This book breaks down into two halves. The concepts and practices in the first half were eye-opening, relatable, and novel. I took away many insights around the relationships between meditation and joy, practices that I’ve incorporated into my daily life, and hard science & statistics to back up the importance of the breath and mindfulness. The second half of the book was a lot slower for me, partially because it became repetitive and partially because the concepts covered were perhaps too “advanced” for layman. I’d give the first half of the book a 5/5 and the second half a 3/5.
July 12, 2017
I don't know if I had a bit of a virus or if this book was just full of highly successful relaxing visualizations and meditations because I fell asleep several times over the course of reading this book. That said, I got a lot out of it and I totally understood the Dalai Lama's last tweet on Twitter. Hi five Lama.
September 13, 2023
I like the idea that one can “train” oneself for mental/emotional happiness much as one can train oneself for physical fitness.
October 8, 2016
Amazing book as always. Good follow up to the previous one. Slight repetitive but a good refresher none the elss.
March 10, 2017
I appreciated the humour and concrete mindfulness techniques. I would recommend this to people who are interested in mindfulness and cultivating more joy in both their lives and the world.
January 17, 2019
20181216 ◊ Book was just so-so; narration was awful. The narrator went with a falsely chirpy reading style which made the material come across as cartoonish and ineffectual. I think they were going for upbeat, but it came across as disingenuous.
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