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A Widow's Walk: A Memoir of 9/11
On September 11, I dropped my son off at his second full day of kindergarten. The sky was so blue it looked as if it had been ironed. I crossed the street, ordered coffee, and sat to wait for my husband to meet me. It was our eighth wedding anniversary and Dave and I were about to begin a new chapter in our seventeen years together. Sipping coffee, I watched as a line of thick black smoke crept across the sky from Manhattan, oblivious to the fact that my life was about to change forever.
On September 11, 2001, Marian Fontana lost her husband, Dave, a firefighter from the elite Squad 1 in Brooklyn, in the World Trade Center attack. A Widow's Walk begins that fateful morning, when Marian, a playwright and comedienne, became a widow, a single mother, and an unlikely activist.
Two weeks after 9/11, the city attempted to close Squad 1, which had suffered the loss of twelve men. Known for her feisty spirit and passionate loyalty, Marian, who was still reeling from her profound loss, began to mobilize the neighborhood to keep the firehouse open. From this unlikely platform the 9/11 Widows and Victims' Families Association grew. Over the next twelve months, Marian struggled with the tragedy's endless ripple effects, from the minute and deeply personal—she wonders who will play Star Wars with her son, Aidan, and carry him on his shoulders; to the she works to get families and widows necessary information about the recovery effort and attends private meetings with Governor Pataki, Mayor Giuliani, Senator Clinton, and Mayor Bloomberg.
Through it all, Marian's irrepressible humor is her best armor, as well as evidence of her buoyant strength. Written with great heart and humanity, A Widow's Walk is a timely opportunity for remembrance and a timeless testament to love's loss and the resilience of the human spirit.
On September 11, 2001, Marian Fontana lost her husband, Dave, a firefighter from the elite Squad 1 in Brooklyn, in the World Trade Center attack. A Widow's Walk begins that fateful morning, when Marian, a playwright and comedienne, became a widow, a single mother, and an unlikely activist.
Two weeks after 9/11, the city attempted to close Squad 1, which had suffered the loss of twelve men. Known for her feisty spirit and passionate loyalty, Marian, who was still reeling from her profound loss, began to mobilize the neighborhood to keep the firehouse open. From this unlikely platform the 9/11 Widows and Victims' Families Association grew. Over the next twelve months, Marian struggled with the tragedy's endless ripple effects, from the minute and deeply personal—she wonders who will play Star Wars with her son, Aidan, and carry him on his shoulders; to the she works to get families and widows necessary information about the recovery effort and attends private meetings with Governor Pataki, Mayor Giuliani, Senator Clinton, and Mayor Bloomberg.
Through it all, Marian's irrepressible humor is her best armor, as well as evidence of her buoyant strength. Written with great heart and humanity, A Widow's Walk is a timely opportunity for remembrance and a timeless testament to love's loss and the resilience of the human spirit.
420 pages, Paperback
First published August 30, 2005
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 77 reviews
September 26, 2011
With the 10th anniversary of 9/11 I found myself re-reading many of the stories relating to that day that I had read and forgotten. As I listened to programs acknowledging the anniversary, I found Marian Fontana's name continually popping up. I heard her interviewed by Ira Glass on This American Life and was fascinated. I just finished reading her memoir, A Widow's Walk, and I find myself unable to let go of this book. I find that I am thinking of it often throughout the day--thinking of her,of her husband (a firefighter in Brooklyn's Park Slope neighborhood who died in the South Tower), and of her small son, Aidan. The book is eloquent, wrenching and beautiful. Despite the sadness present in the memoir I found myself wanting to return every day to her small apartment in Park Slope as she negotiated the horror, grief, and overwhelming sadness of that day and the days that followed. I hate maudlin writing and hers is far from this--while she is part of a larger tragedy, her story is very personal and I found myself in awe of her skill as a writer, able to weave the story of her life with Dave and their son, Aidan, into the experiences of her first year of widow-hood. It's a haunting book--it's aura is difficult to shake, but it feels honest and sincere and I found myself loving this family by the end of the memoir. I cried at the end not just because of the overall sadness of the story, but because I had to say good-bye to them as well.
December 25, 2019
I feel like I’m a terrible person for the low rating but there something different about this one that I can’t quite figure out, compared to so many others that I’ve read. Review to come.
December 8, 2011
I really did not want to give this book only two stars when it is a true story about a horrific event, but I did force myself to read everything even though I was tempted many times to "skim" sections.
Due to the subject matter, I knew this was going to be a difficult read. I wish Marian would have waited and written beyond the one year period. I did not care for the writing style at all. It felt like I was reading a diary or somebody's journal. I think with better editing this could have been a much shorter book.
The writing felt very honest, but many times it felt like blah, blah, blah... I was just as exhausted as Marian was. There were too many characters introduced that I just gave up trying to keep track of everyone. I wish the author would have provided more of her own thoughts versus factual never-ending details.
There are thousands of people everyday that are forced to live through horrible events. Granted 9/11 was an absolute shocker, but in the end I felt like Marian thought the 9/11 widows have been the only people to experience such an event. Reading this book reminded me of the recent Dr. Conrad Murray/Michael Jackson trial. At the beginning, you can't even function because you are in such shock. You just can't register what you have seen/experienced. Nobody could believe that Michael Jackson was receiving Propofol in his home by a doctor. It was unheard of and unbelievable.
Thus, I understand where Marian was coming from, but there were a few sore spots with me:
1. Yes, Marian's hubby looked like a handsome guy, but I grew weary of hearing about how perfect he was. NOBODY is that great.
2. Marian was outraged at the $450 weekly pay her hubby received for being a firefighter, yet, they were planning on having a second child. This seems to be the thought pattern of a very immature couple. You cannot afford to live with your current income, but you want to bring another mouth to feed into the situation?
3. Marian mentioned once or twice about the "blood money" she received, but she seemed ungrateful for many of the things she and her family received. It was not until I read the "Acknowledgements" section that I felt some gratitude.
Marian did not discuss the total amount of compensation she received, and she may not have know at the time of the writing of the book, but I have researched and on the average it is stated to be $1.8 to $2 million. Some people up to $7 million.
Marian was upset with the search stoppage by firefighters, but now it seems that those who did assist are dying from ailments obtained from being around Ground Zero. This event was something enormous and I was disappointed at how unprepared the U.S. appeared to be. I thought our government had a better capacity to avoid and assist than it did. Like many citizens, we instead are learning along the way some tough life lessons.
One small nugget I learned from this event is that only about 25% of the deceased had a will. That was pretty surprising to me.
In the end, everybody has to do whatever it is to get them through. When you are married, you are a partnership. When one of the partners departs in a sudden and horrific manner, going forward is even harder. Marian had a very deep love with her spouse and that by itself is a gift that a lot of people never have in life. Hopefully she can find that type of love again.
Due to the subject matter, I knew this was going to be a difficult read. I wish Marian would have waited and written beyond the one year period. I did not care for the writing style at all. It felt like I was reading a diary or somebody's journal. I think with better editing this could have been a much shorter book.
The writing felt very honest, but many times it felt like blah, blah, blah... I was just as exhausted as Marian was. There were too many characters introduced that I just gave up trying to keep track of everyone. I wish the author would have provided more of her own thoughts versus factual never-ending details.
There are thousands of people everyday that are forced to live through horrible events. Granted 9/11 was an absolute shocker, but in the end I felt like Marian thought the 9/11 widows have been the only people to experience such an event. Reading this book reminded me of the recent Dr. Conrad Murray/Michael Jackson trial. At the beginning, you can't even function because you are in such shock. You just can't register what you have seen/experienced. Nobody could believe that Michael Jackson was receiving Propofol in his home by a doctor. It was unheard of and unbelievable.
Thus, I understand where Marian was coming from, but there were a few sore spots with me:
1. Yes, Marian's hubby looked like a handsome guy, but I grew weary of hearing about how perfect he was. NOBODY is that great.
2. Marian was outraged at the $450 weekly pay her hubby received for being a firefighter, yet, they were planning on having a second child. This seems to be the thought pattern of a very immature couple. You cannot afford to live with your current income, but you want to bring another mouth to feed into the situation?
3. Marian mentioned once or twice about the "blood money" she received, but she seemed ungrateful for many of the things she and her family received. It was not until I read the "Acknowledgements" section that I felt some gratitude.
Marian did not discuss the total amount of compensation she received, and she may not have know at the time of the writing of the book, but I have researched and on the average it is stated to be $1.8 to $2 million. Some people up to $7 million.
Marian was upset with the search stoppage by firefighters, but now it seems that those who did assist are dying from ailments obtained from being around Ground Zero. This event was something enormous and I was disappointed at how unprepared the U.S. appeared to be. I thought our government had a better capacity to avoid and assist than it did. Like many citizens, we instead are learning along the way some tough life lessons.
One small nugget I learned from this event is that only about 25% of the deceased had a will. That was pretty surprising to me.
In the end, everybody has to do whatever it is to get them through. When you are married, you are a partnership. When one of the partners departs in a sudden and horrific manner, going forward is even harder. Marian had a very deep love with her spouse and that by itself is a gift that a lot of people never have in life. Hopefully she can find that type of love again.
January 2, 2011
Hauntingly beautifully written, the author leads you through each excruciating day from the news of the attacks through the ensuing first year. Extremely personal, touching, sincere. In opposition to previous reviews, I did not in any way, shape or form, feel the author was a glutton for attention or the spot light. On the contrary, I respect her for being a vehicle to be proactive instead of crumbling and becoming nonfunctioning (which is what I imagine I would probably do).
My husband and I had worked within yards from the World Trade Center at the time. This book was as authentic and accurate as I have ever seen a story be told, and it was pretty jarring to hear certain references that those of us who were in the direct vincinity of Ground Zero would be familiar with. I truly relived this period of time through these pages. It is an extremely raw story, like an exposed nerve, just as the event itself was, but it was very elegantly done.
Although the book is based solely around her experience in dealing with the day and the aftermath, picking up the pieces again, I am only left wondering why there was no mention as to her thoughts of 9/11 as the ACT itself. I am curious as to why this day comes off as a terrible natural act of God, instead of the intentional mass murder that it was. There was no reference to terrorists, so there was no personal account of her feelings towards them or what they did. While the author expressed anger, it was only directed at her husband for leaving her this way. Perhaps because she was trying to cope, or was so immersed in getting through each day and making sure the Ground Zero process was being handled properly that she did not focus on the "why's", I myself would have been furious and demanding the heads of those who intentionally caused this brutality. Sheer curiousy why there was no mention of terrorists, of Osama Bin Laden or of the other tragedies involving the Pentagon and Flight 93.
Though it was a tough read, and need a lighter story to follow, it was moving, well written, and my heart goes out to this courageous author and activist.
My husband and I had worked within yards from the World Trade Center at the time. This book was as authentic and accurate as I have ever seen a story be told, and it was pretty jarring to hear certain references that those of us who were in the direct vincinity of Ground Zero would be familiar with. I truly relived this period of time through these pages. It is an extremely raw story, like an exposed nerve, just as the event itself was, but it was very elegantly done.
Although the book is based solely around her experience in dealing with the day and the aftermath, picking up the pieces again, I am only left wondering why there was no mention as to her thoughts of 9/11 as the ACT itself. I am curious as to why this day comes off as a terrible natural act of God, instead of the intentional mass murder that it was. There was no reference to terrorists, so there was no personal account of her feelings towards them or what they did. While the author expressed anger, it was only directed at her husband for leaving her this way. Perhaps because she was trying to cope, or was so immersed in getting through each day and making sure the Ground Zero process was being handled properly that she did not focus on the "why's", I myself would have been furious and demanding the heads of those who intentionally caused this brutality. Sheer curiousy why there was no mention of terrorists, of Osama Bin Laden or of the other tragedies involving the Pentagon and Flight 93.
Though it was a tough read, and need a lighter story to follow, it was moving, well written, and my heart goes out to this courageous author and activist.
November 9, 2008
Listeners to This American Life will recognize Marian Fontana with these words: The old double whammy.
That story is not included in the book, but I don’t want to spoil it. It’s enough to say that indifference in high places leads to brutality.
Marian Fontana is the widow of Dave Fontana, a New York firefighter. He had just gone off duty on the morning of September 11, 2001. But when word of the attacks on the World Trade Center reached FDNY Squad 1 in Brooklyn, he responded and was killed in the collapse of the towers, along with 11 others from the Squad. This book is an account of Marian's life and the life of their five year old son in the months after September 11.
The search for Dave's remains provides a little narrative drive. But most of the book is a forced march of wakes, funerals, and memorials that seems endless. The FDNY families, shackled by grief, shuffle from one ceremony to the next. The reader follows along. In a small way, we share Marian's exhaustion. And we puzzle, as she does, over the paradoxes.
Do the rigid ceremonies of death, especially the death in action of a firefighter, provide strength and support? Or are they a suffocating routine that pulls the families back again and again to September 11? Both, I’m afraid.
Do you like to be the center of attention? Marian does. But the constant scrutiny of family friends, acquaintances, the media, and yes, even Oprah, become unbearable.
Do the politicians join our grief and give voice to it? Or are we just an opportunity for them to ingratiate themselves with voters?
Is it right to use the massive tragedy of September 11 to promote more recognition and better pay for firefighters and to block FDNY’s clumsy attempt to close Squad 1 in Brooklyn? Is it right for a President to use that tragedy to justify a war thousands of miles away—a war Marian opposes?
Perhaps that fellow was right. Life is full of double whammies.
That story is not included in the book, but I don’t want to spoil it. It’s enough to say that indifference in high places leads to brutality.
Marian Fontana is the widow of Dave Fontana, a New York firefighter. He had just gone off duty on the morning of September 11, 2001. But when word of the attacks on the World Trade Center reached FDNY Squad 1 in Brooklyn, he responded and was killed in the collapse of the towers, along with 11 others from the Squad. This book is an account of Marian's life and the life of their five year old son in the months after September 11.
The search for Dave's remains provides a little narrative drive. But most of the book is a forced march of wakes, funerals, and memorials that seems endless. The FDNY families, shackled by grief, shuffle from one ceremony to the next. The reader follows along. In a small way, we share Marian's exhaustion. And we puzzle, as she does, over the paradoxes.
Do the rigid ceremonies of death, especially the death in action of a firefighter, provide strength and support? Or are they a suffocating routine that pulls the families back again and again to September 11? Both, I’m afraid.
Do you like to be the center of attention? Marian does. But the constant scrutiny of family friends, acquaintances, the media, and yes, even Oprah, become unbearable.
Do the politicians join our grief and give voice to it? Or are we just an opportunity for them to ingratiate themselves with voters?
Is it right to use the massive tragedy of September 11 to promote more recognition and better pay for firefighters and to block FDNY’s clumsy attempt to close Squad 1 in Brooklyn? Is it right for a President to use that tragedy to justify a war thousands of miles away—a war Marian opposes?
Perhaps that fellow was right. Life is full of double whammies.
September 7, 2010
As I sat at a sporting event reading this book the first weekend of September, a man asked what I was reading. When I told him, he said, "Oh, wow. Hmm. I lived through it once. I don't think I could do it again."
That's why I read this book. And for many more reasons. I'll review it fully on our blog on Friday, but, really, it's a book that I'm glad that I bought instead of borrowing from the library. I have a feeling I'll come back to it again and again... despite the constant tears while reading it.
That's why I read this book. And for many more reasons. I'll review it fully on our blog on Friday, but, really, it's a book that I'm glad that I bought instead of borrowing from the library. I have a feeling I'll come back to it again and again... despite the constant tears while reading it.
September 26, 2010
I have to be honest... I didn't thoroughly read this book. I basically skimmed it. Because the subject matter of this book was so hard to get through that if I would have really read every word, I would've been crying every second I read this book.
That said, I thought this book was interesting, although at times it read like a "and then I did this, and then I did this..." and basically I just wanted to know what the end result was. Maybe I read this book at the wrong time though. Maybe I wasn't in the right mindset to read this book. But it was a hard book to read.
That said, I thought this book was interesting, although at times it read like a "and then I did this, and then I did this..." and basically I just wanted to know what the end result was. Maybe I read this book at the wrong time though. Maybe I wasn't in the right mindset to read this book. But it was a hard book to read.
May 21, 2016
I haven't read a 9-11 book for quite some time, but this one was well worth the read. Marian Fontana writes excellently, and even humorously at times, despite the subject matter. The book was generously written, taking the reader into Marian's personal emotions and experiences of losing his firefighter husband, mothering her young son through grief, and becoming a voice for the firefighters' widows.
Beyond providing a unique window into the tragedy of 9-11, Fontana's book speaks to all who experience grief and loss.
Beyond providing a unique window into the tragedy of 9-11, Fontana's book speaks to all who experience grief and loss.
July 27, 2018
I have read many books about 9/11, most of them are about around and inside the Twin Towers, A Widow's walk, however, is a memoir written by a firefighter's wife who lost him on 9/11. Many parts were hard to read but some were inspiring too. I am amazed at the families who worst day was September 11 still found the courage and solace in each other, the kindness, and fought what they believed in. I hope Marian Fontana finds the happiness and peace she deserves. Dave would have been proud of her.
October 8, 2015
Sad story, but a personal glimpse into the life of a 911 "survivor." Hard to read sometimes because never having experienced what Fontana did, you can't imagine making some of the choices she made especially having a young son to take care of. Just goes to show you there is no method to grieving even for a parent. Also the scope of what the family had to deal with in the early days of 911 is beyond frightening. Very honest and raw.
October 23, 2012
Taughtly woven, expertly intertwining events in the past with those of 9/11, this book is gripping. Honest, loving, angry, grateful - all at once. Fontana did an excellent job of conveying her thoughts and feelings throughout the event and the beginnings of her healing. Get a box of tissues and settle in for an excellent read!
January 17, 2025
I cried my way through this whole book! Just like the quote on the cover says, Fontana is able to take an incredibly public and tragic events and turn it into a beautiful personal narrative. It was a privilege to hear a families perspective of the events of 9/11 and life after.
September 8, 2010
Having read several other books on 9/11, I found out some things I didn't know or had forgotten.
September 5, 2021
The book is a very personal account of what it was like for Marian starting from the first moments, moving into days, weeks and months that followed. She doesn’t hold her anger back; she shares her natural interactions with others, including her impatience and frustration with things happening around her. There are some beautifully written expressions:
“I clutch my heart but it is as futile as trying to stop the ocean”; “My mind feels like I have 12 radio stations playing all at once”; “Hope expands in my chest, separating my ribs with possibility”; “ I grab onto hope like a newborn to a finger”; “…whiskey that burns like hot soup”; “…until the pink light of morning seeps through my window” …"pungent smoke like the earth turning itself inside out."
Readers are drawn in on her roller coaster of emotions during those first stages of grief, anger being at the fore. She expresses that honestly, which might be too much for people who would rather avoid the tough and raw reality. Marian is a strong and creative woman. She’s also a no nonsense person who jabs at the heart of things rather than stepping carefully around them. Instead of waiting on the side lines for action, she jumps in and addresses injustices she sees around her. She channels her pain into support and action. . The story is told from the perspective of a widow’s, hence the title. It’s her memoir, not an overall history of 911.
“I clutch my heart but it is as futile as trying to stop the ocean”; “My mind feels like I have 12 radio stations playing all at once”; “Hope expands in my chest, separating my ribs with possibility”; “ I grab onto hope like a newborn to a finger”; “…whiskey that burns like hot soup”; “…until the pink light of morning seeps through my window” …"pungent smoke like the earth turning itself inside out."
Readers are drawn in on her roller coaster of emotions during those first stages of grief, anger being at the fore. She expresses that honestly, which might be too much for people who would rather avoid the tough and raw reality. Marian is a strong and creative woman. She’s also a no nonsense person who jabs at the heart of things rather than stepping carefully around them. Instead of waiting on the side lines for action, she jumps in and addresses injustices she sees around her. She channels her pain into support and action. . The story is told from the perspective of a widow’s, hence the title. It’s her memoir, not an overall history of 911.
August 24, 2025
“Losing love is like a window in your heart. Everybody sees you’re blown apart. Everybody sees the wind blow.” – Paul Simon
Everyone's grief is different, yet not.
In A Widow's Walk, Marian Fontana described life in the year or so after her husband's death on 9/11 – the not knowing, the guessing, the knowing the acting despite all else. The ways people came together (or failed to do so). David Fontana was one of the firefighters from Squad One, a squad where twelve of 30 men were killed in their rescue attempts at Ground Zero. He died on their 8th wedding anniversary, while Marian waited at a café to celebrate their time together. When the alarm came through, he (of course) went to the Towers, despite being off that day.
This is a beautiful ode to David Fontana and, simultaneously, a lovely documentation of how Marian survived. I often wonder how one gets from here to some superhuman endeavor (e.g., how was the first computer built? How did humanity tame wheat and corn?). Marian described her process well: one step at a time.
But, she didn't attribute her successes to ignoring her emotions; she certainly described a lot of time wailing, sleeping (or wanting to sleep), smoking. She allowed us to see her anger and pain, her support, and her action. In doing so, she demystified grief and challenged our stereotypes about grief and grieving.
"How dare the world continue when so many people are suffering?" (p. 39).
Everyone's grief is different, yet not.
In A Widow's Walk, Marian Fontana described life in the year or so after her husband's death on 9/11 – the not knowing, the guessing, the knowing the acting despite all else. The ways people came together (or failed to do so). David Fontana was one of the firefighters from Squad One, a squad where twelve of 30 men were killed in their rescue attempts at Ground Zero. He died on their 8th wedding anniversary, while Marian waited at a café to celebrate their time together. When the alarm came through, he (of course) went to the Towers, despite being off that day.
This is a beautiful ode to David Fontana and, simultaneously, a lovely documentation of how Marian survived. I often wonder how one gets from here to some superhuman endeavor (e.g., how was the first computer built? How did humanity tame wheat and corn?). Marian described her process well: one step at a time.
But, she didn't attribute her successes to ignoring her emotions; she certainly described a lot of time wailing, sleeping (or wanting to sleep), smoking. She allowed us to see her anger and pain, her support, and her action. In doing so, she demystified grief and challenged our stereotypes about grief and grieving.
"How dare the world continue when so many people are suffering?" (p. 39).
July 4, 2025
I only recently heard of this book and was not sure whether I wanted to read it or not. I knew it would be emotional, traumatic and heartbreaking. But I also felt it would be honest, raw and inspiring. I vividly remember the events of 9th September 2001 and the impact in had across the globe, including here in Australia, and much has been written about it then and since. But not by someone like Marion Fontana. I learned so much from reading her story and am truly grateful that she used her writing skills in such a powerful way. Sharing how what was to be the Fontana’s 8th Wedding Anniversary turned into a day of such unimaginable grief, she allowed the reader to gain an insight into the lives of those who protect us and those who love them. This was all done while trying to cope with a young son, too little to understand the chaos around him in all the days and weeks that followed. To be this vulnerable takes an enormous amount of courage, but to do it while also advocating on behalf of others, takes real guts. I hope Marion and Aidan have found comfort and peace.
September 17, 2023
The past few years I have read a book about 9/11 in September. After finishing half of the book I was more interested in what became of Marian Fontana. I studied the pictures,skimmed the rest of the book then went on the internet for more information. The book is a very detailed story of the first year the author became a widow after 9/11. I would recommend other books on the 9/11 tragedy but kudos to the author for her bravery in telling her story. Never forget.
April 22, 2018
Excellent book. Read it every chance I got and did not want to put it down. Like so many books about 9/11, it brought tears to my eyes many times. Her story is heartbreaking, but reading how she learned to live with her loss and how she had to help her son through the loss was incredible. Marian is a truly remarkable woman.
April 19, 2019
This was a hard book for me to read, as I am engaged to a firefighter. We may have both been in 3rd grade when 9/11 happened, but it still had an effect on us and makes the firefighter brotherhood so strong and important. I feel that every fire wife/widow should read this because either someone can relate to it or actually get a sense of what could happen with their line of work.
December 17, 2020
One woman who lost her firefighter husband on 9/11 tells her story in the most intimate, heartbreaking way possible, beginning on the morning of the attack and ending on the one year anniversary. The writing is powerful and beautiful. She says that she wrote it for her then 5 year old son so he’ll always remember; I definitely will.
October 16, 2017
A widow’s walk was gut wrenching and difficult to read st times. I myself could not even imagine what people went through after 911. I am glad I read the book, as it give me a greater insight to the pain and suffering people went through
September 12, 2017
This is a heartbreaking and loving story. Marion's passion and love for her husband will last forever. Dave and all the other's sacrifices will never be forgotten.
March 27, 2019
Memoir of 9/11
March 20, 2021
I would never feel right writing a review of this book....her feelings, thoughts, and beliefs are her own and deserve to be respected. We will never forget 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
October 30, 2023
I will be really interested to see how an updated version of this book reads, considering I found out about this book from her 20 years later article.
September 26, 2024
One of the most beautiful stories we'll ever be blessed to read.
June 1, 2025
Touching and real
Heartbreaking and informative. A side of th 9/11 horror we didn't know.A very real view from the f as miles of firefighters lost.
Heartbreaking and informative. A side of th 9/11 horror we didn't know.A very real view from the f as miles of firefighters lost.
May 30, 2008
I read this memoir, written by the widow of a 9/11 firefighter killed at the WTC, after reading other books about 9/11 and other 9/11 widows.
The author writes her memoir more like a novel, it seems, than an introspective exploration of her experience, and as such it is easy to read...as a literary work, at least. Its subject matter isn't easy to read, in contrast, but it's a testatment to Fontana's writing ability and personal strength that she was able to document such a tragic, wrenching time in her life with such humanity, detail, and honesty. Its portrayal of grief and widowhood is unflinching and authentic--and as a young widow myself, it's highly accurate. Her writing style, pacing, and readability are quite good.
I have only a few complaints about the book. The biggest one is that it only covered the first year of grief, and as a young widow almost three years out, I would have preferred more about life after the first year...but the author had to cut off somewhere and the one-year anniversary is a logical ending in many ways. Unfortunately, though, it's often just the beginning of a lot of continuing grief for a young widow or widower, and ending the "story" here may only serve to confirm to the general public that grief ends (or at least automatically gets better) after one year, which simply isn't true most of the time. Also, while I liked the author's writing style and how she stuck to details, facts, and events, I would have liked a little bit more reflection and introspection on what she thought about her experiences--on her internal reactions instead of her external reactions. But these are small niggling points as a result of my personal experiences, and not from approaching it as a general reader. I do, however, agree with other reviewers that it was really difficult to navigate and differentiate all the names and people she mentions.
If I could, I'd probably give it 3 1/2 stars instead of just 3. As nonfiction, it's hard to know where I'd place it in context with the largely fictional books I usually read. As a grief book I liked it, but not as much as other 4-star grief books I've read. I wanted more out of it than was there...but that's probably because what was there was still very good to begin with.
As a general work of nonfiction, as a memoir, and as a work of writerly merit, however, this was an excellent book. I highly recommend it to those interested in learning more about the real-life, human impact of 9/11 and about the first year of widowhood and grief.
The author writes her memoir more like a novel, it seems, than an introspective exploration of her experience, and as such it is easy to read...as a literary work, at least. Its subject matter isn't easy to read, in contrast, but it's a testatment to Fontana's writing ability and personal strength that she was able to document such a tragic, wrenching time in her life with such humanity, detail, and honesty. Its portrayal of grief and widowhood is unflinching and authentic--and as a young widow myself, it's highly accurate. Her writing style, pacing, and readability are quite good.
I have only a few complaints about the book. The biggest one is that it only covered the first year of grief, and as a young widow almost three years out, I would have preferred more about life after the first year...but the author had to cut off somewhere and the one-year anniversary is a logical ending in many ways. Unfortunately, though, it's often just the beginning of a lot of continuing grief for a young widow or widower, and ending the "story" here may only serve to confirm to the general public that grief ends (or at least automatically gets better) after one year, which simply isn't true most of the time. Also, while I liked the author's writing style and how she stuck to details, facts, and events, I would have liked a little bit more reflection and introspection on what she thought about her experiences--on her internal reactions instead of her external reactions. But these are small niggling points as a result of my personal experiences, and not from approaching it as a general reader. I do, however, agree with other reviewers that it was really difficult to navigate and differentiate all the names and people she mentions.
If I could, I'd probably give it 3 1/2 stars instead of just 3. As nonfiction, it's hard to know where I'd place it in context with the largely fictional books I usually read. As a grief book I liked it, but not as much as other 4-star grief books I've read. I wanted more out of it than was there...but that's probably because what was there was still very good to begin with.
As a general work of nonfiction, as a memoir, and as a work of writerly merit, however, this was an excellent book. I highly recommend it to those interested in learning more about the real-life, human impact of 9/11 and about the first year of widowhood and grief.
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October 31, 2014Marian Fontana had just dropped her young son off for school when she learned of the tragedy unfolding on 9/11. She had just spoken with her firefighter husband, Dave, who had confirmed he was on his way home to celebrate their wedding anniversary. After hours of not hearing from him, Marian's fears were confirmed- her husband was one of the heroic firefighters who sacrificed their lives trying to save others.
From here, we follow Marian's journey for the next year: struggling with her grief, raising her young son alone, attending far too many funerals and memorials, all while advocating for various causes. Through Marian, we learn that although firefighters like her husband put their lives on the line everyday, they are drastically underpaid; as well, we learn about the chaos surrounding firefighters and their struggles with recovery efforts at Ground Zero.
Although the subject matter in this book is very heavy, the author still manages to add humour, and does not hold back on any emotions- the writing is fantastic. However, this is a book that I've had lying around for years, and I'm disappointed that I did not take the time to read it sooner. Now that I finally have, I think I may have waited too long; for me, this book was far too long and took me over a week to get through. For that, I'll have to refrain from any ratings- definitely worth the read, and I can only imagine how much more I would have enjoyed it had I taken the time to read it 5 years ago.
From here, we follow Marian's journey for the next year: struggling with her grief, raising her young son alone, attending far too many funerals and memorials, all while advocating for various causes. Through Marian, we learn that although firefighters like her husband put their lives on the line everyday, they are drastically underpaid; as well, we learn about the chaos surrounding firefighters and their struggles with recovery efforts at Ground Zero.
Although the subject matter in this book is very heavy, the author still manages to add humour, and does not hold back on any emotions- the writing is fantastic. However, this is a book that I've had lying around for years, and I'm disappointed that I did not take the time to read it sooner. Now that I finally have, I think I may have waited too long; for me, this book was far too long and took me over a week to get through. For that, I'll have to refrain from any ratings- definitely worth the read, and I can only imagine how much more I would have enjoyed it had I taken the time to read it 5 years ago.
November 18, 2011
This is a first for me. I'm giving this book a four star rating and yet I didn't "really liked it" and refuse to finish it right now and am returning it instead to the library.
So I have to take it back because I just can't read it anymore. I have had to read it in spurts rather than all in one or two sittings, and as such am only partway through the book and realized last night that it's leaving me genuinely depressed! I'm sure there's hope and inspiration in there somewhere toward the end and granted the author is only a month out from 9/11 where I am in the book, so of course it's just sad. But this is more. Maybe this is a backhanded compliment to the author, but the way she writes draws me into her world in such a powerful way I find myself absolutely in mourning for a period when I go back to my own life. It's weird. I'll to to balance my checkbook or something mundane and struggle getting back into my normal happy life because of the weight I feel for a loss I didn't actually experience. Every time. So I may try again some other time but for the sake of my own sanity and for the family I live with today I just can't take any more of this one now.
So I have to take it back because I just can't read it anymore. I have had to read it in spurts rather than all in one or two sittings, and as such am only partway through the book and realized last night that it's leaving me genuinely depressed! I'm sure there's hope and inspiration in there somewhere toward the end and granted the author is only a month out from 9/11 where I am in the book, so of course it's just sad. But this is more. Maybe this is a backhanded compliment to the author, but the way she writes draws me into her world in such a powerful way I find myself absolutely in mourning for a period when I go back to my own life. It's weird. I'll to to balance my checkbook or something mundane and struggle getting back into my normal happy life because of the weight I feel for a loss I didn't actually experience. Every time. So I may try again some other time but for the sake of my own sanity and for the family I live with today I just can't take any more of this one now.
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