Horror Film Poems

by Christoph Paul

A love letter to horror films where poems are the paragraphs.

“If Jack Kerouac watched horror films instead of drinking himself to death he still wouldn’t have written this book. But who cares because Jack Kerouac sucked. This book however does not. Christoph Paul has melded two of my favorite things into one hell of a fun read.”

-Philip LoPresti author of Haunted Fucking and Wytchcult Rising


"Christoph Paul wants literature to be fun and with his horror film poems, he does what he does best; take a giant novelty sledgehammer to pretension and break down the flimsy fake boundaries between junk food and so called literature"

- Garrett Cook, author of A God of Hungry Walls


"A compilation of nightmares divested straight from the lore of our subconscious; horror fans are treated to vignettes of their favorite horror stories captured in wicked language."

-Vincenzo Bilof, author of The Horror Show


"Christoph Paul proves his poetic chops time and time again here, by letting us fill in the blanks, disturbing our senses, and pointing out the beauty in the blood. This is a collection that no horror-fan should live without."

-Jay Sizemore, author of Father Figures and Confessions of a Porn Addict

Genres: Poetry, Horror, Ebooks

162 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 11, 2016

About the author

Christoph Paul is an award-winning humor author. He writes non-fiction, YA, Bizarro, horror, and poetry including: The Passion of the Christoph, Great White House Volume 1 and Volume 2, Slasher Camp for Nerd Dorks, A Confederacy of Hot Dogs, and Horror Film Poems. He is the managing editor for CLASH Media and CLASH Books and edited the anthologies Walk Hand in Hand Into Extinction: Stories Inspired by True Detective and This Book Ain’t Nuttin to F*%k With: A Wu-Tang Tribute Anthology. Under the pen name Mandy De Sandra, he writes Bizarro Erotica that has been covered in VICE, Huffington Post, Jezebel, and AV Club.

Reviews

[Janie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?  Dost thou see a book before thee?  Allow it to guide thine eyes.  Christoph Paul hath written poetry capturing the essence and soul(lessness) of 27 horror films (if I hath counted correctly).  His verses are witty, fiendish and shrewdly delectable. Feast thine eyes also on illustrations by the talented Joel Ama Guell, and dream tonight of androids, devil spawn and Chucky.  I spitteth on thy grave.

[Leo Robertson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is aweeesooommmeee!

The poems read as if written in the hopes that someone reads them before their author's throat is slit. And such a variety to enjoy. They vary in style depending on the subject, from concrete (Blair Witch) to haiku (Cannibal Holocaust, Evil Dead) to metafictional (Carrie, Zombieland) to direct quotes reappropriated (Videodrome, others, I assume) to the juvenile (Piranha 3D) to song lyrics (Blacula) and even a Christmas carol (Krampus)!

Paul even took time to apply the apparent underlying meaning to A Serbian Film that the film itself was lacking. (I didn't think there was anything to be afraid of with that one: it was too stupid to even be disgusting.)

I hope there are soon some videos out of performances and I hope that Paul's immense fanbase start composing the music to this. How cool would that be? Horror Film ALBUMS!

The contextual art is really cool also. The artist is super talented and has created this cool, charcoaly smeared watercolour style that works well with this book.

Highly recommended :)

[Melly · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won this book from Goodreads Giveaways. I think I'm meant to tell you that so you'll know I could be biased..? but you know, one time when I was trolling the site I discovered a whole series of children's books about a little boy whose best friend is a fart, an anthropomorphic fart that keeps him company and gets him into all kinds of wacky hijinx, and, like, if you're five-starring that just because you got it for free, you got problems, son.

Anyway I am biased, because I like poetry and I love horror movies, so you know: two great tastes that taste great together.

I didn't know anything about this book other than its premise, going in, so I admit I suspected that it would be extremely terrible--the kind of poetry where someone just throws a lot of inane sentence fragments around with weird spacing and indifferent punctuation, the kind of illustrations that say "This guy is my best friend and he offered to do it, what was I supposed to say?"

Instead, the only criticism I can make about it is, he has the heroine from Scream as Cindy, not Sidney, come on, man.

I'm the kind of mean-spirited turnip who could maybe turn on a guy for making a mistake like that, but first of all I don't even like Scream, secondly the poems are thoughtful and intelligent and even moving at times, which you don't necessarily expect in a volume that includes movies like Cannibal Holocaust, and finally, the illustrations are fantastic.

I would recommend it to anyone who isn't grossed out by horror movies, even if they don't watch them. It is weird and special and kind of lovely, and I'm so glad I won it.

[exorcismemily · Rating 2 out of 5]

"The blood talks to me."

Horror Film Poems is such a fun concept, but I didn't love the execution. The poems were pretty hit or miss, and there ended up being a lot more misses for me by the end of the book.

I think part of my issue may have been my expectations - I thought the poems were going to be more serious, but a lot of them seemed to be more humor-based. I found out afterward that the author is a humor writer, so that makes sense. It just wasn't really what I wanted. I'm not thrilled about buying a book that has a poem that just says "bloody fucking hell." Some of it just felt like a joke. I wanted more out of it.

I didn't really feel like any of the poems brought anything new, and none of them made me think. It was too light for a book about horror movies. I wanted something more like I Am Not Your Final Girl by Claire C. Holland.

My top 5 poems in this book were American Psycho, Event Horizon, Halloween, Hellraiser, and Saw. Although these were my favorites, none of the poems in this book were 5⭐ for me.

I know I'm nitpicking, but it's absurd to write a book like this and get a character's name wrong. In Scream, the character's name is listed as Cindy, which is the character's name from Scary Movie. Sydney is from Scream. Come on.

Anyway, I think this was a promising idea, but the poems didn't work for me.

[Donald Armfield · Rating 5 out of 5]

Christoph takes his love for Horror films and drops a poetic paragraph or few on such titles from classic favorites to the straight to video. Almost reaching an alphabetical slaughter having at least one title from every letter of the alphabet, "Horror Film Poems" splashes an art of writing that I enjoy.
A list of my overall favorites including some quotes below...GET YOUR BLOODY HANDS ON A COPY TODAY!

-American Psycho
-A Serbian Film
-Blacula
-The Birds quote "Black and white-feathered bullets
Kamikaze dance
Across a swarming sky."

-Child's Play
-Halloween
-Krampus (please make this song possible)
-Let The Right One In
-Misery (HaHaHA!)
-Pumpkinhead quote "His body dead-haunts me,
Like pumpkin carvings that whisper
in the dark."

-Tusk
-Zombieland

[Molly · Rating 2 out of 5]

Terrific idea; not-so-terrific execution. I was hoping for something with more depth or insight into the meaning behind films, not short rehashings of their plot and dialogue. The speaker of the poems moves from being the film's villain to the viewer to someone outside the whole thing, and the inconsistency wasn't my favorite thing. Some of the text placement experiments work better than others, like the one for The Blair Witch project. Overall, though, the poems didn't reveal anything new or interesting about the films, and that's what I wanted. The illustrations were good, though.

[Ben Arzate · Rating 4 out of 5]

Full Review

This collection of horror film based poems is a strong one. Like the films it covers, Paul's use of language is funny, disturbing, and very entertaining and the ink paintings by Guell are excellent as well. You don't have to have seen every film here to enjoy this book, I haven't and still found myself unable to put this book down. If you like horror movies, you should especially pick up this collection. Even if you don't normally like poetry, you'll like this.

[Vincenzo Bilof · Rating 5 out of 5]

For fans of classic and iconic horror films, there is a sort of essence, or maybe a prominent image, that figures heavily into a personal connection with those films. In this collection of poems inspired by classic horror concepts, you will find a companion piece that neatly complements any horror fan’s collection. You don’t have to be a poetry major or an art critic to appreciate what author Christoph Paul manages to accomplish with varying prose styles. The styles themselves seemingly mirror the aesthetics/themes of the works they are influenced by. The poems are often quick, insightful reads that can be viewed from a critical perspective, or can be enjoyed for the images/emotions they conjure up.

The art style also serves to cement this book as a neat package of tribute work. The beauty of this collection is that you can easily flip to any poem, and you can nearly re-experience beloved horror stories with the impression of those works; good poetry provokes a reaction from the subconscious, and as horror itself relies on the subconscious, Christoph Paul is able to demonstrate a believable passion for the genre. I think the poems that “stand-out” are really going to depend on which horror films you enjoy the most, anyway. There are witticisms and observations with a hint of satire — some of the best horror stories critique/oppose specific cultural values, and Paul’s recognition of our favorite “boogeymen” is a testament to the faith that the horror audience still has in the genre. A must-buy for horror fans, and, coincidentally, a really cool, personable gift for anyone who enjoys horror films.

[Shannon Everyday · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a huge horror fan, when I saw the title of this book, I knew I had to check it out. Horror Film Poems features all sorts of poems inspired from different horror movies. I could tell, while reading, how much the author loves the genre. It was a quick, enjoyable read, bringing me back to many moments and films I have loved. I have to give a special mention to the poem inspired by Misery, loved it. If you love horror and horror films, I would give this book a read.

[Joshua Chaplinsky · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don't like poetry? It doesn't matter. This collection of poems about horror movies will make you a fan. Paul captures the essence of each film in only a few lines, in hilarious and horrific ways.

[Lisa of LaCreeperie]

Not quite what I was expecting...

[Elizabeth Suggs · Rating 4 out of 5]

Horror Film Poetry by Christoph Paul and illustrated by Joel Amat Güell is an electrifying love letter to the genre that sends chills down your spine and tickles your funny bone all at once. This unique collection features personal poems that take us through the disturbing and hilarious realms of iconic horror films, showcasing both the terror and absurdity that define this beloved genre. Accompanied by striking artwork from Joel Amat Güell, this book is a visual and literary feast for horror enthusiasts.

From Alien to Zombieland, the table of contents reads like a curated film list for your next horror movie marathon. Each poem dives into the essence of its film, capturing the themes, emotions, and memorable moments with a sharp wit that resonates with fans. The shorter poems pack a punch, delivering impactful lines that linger long after reading. For example, in It Follows, the haunting line “We are natural selection haunting itself” speaks volumes about the film’s frightening premise.

One standout is the poem based on American Psycho, where the author mirrors the book's infamous name drops and music references. Lines like, “I then stab the corkscrew into her thighs, spread them and use her labor to pull off the cork,” evoke the visceral horror of the story while maintaining a twisted sense of humor. The tone across the poems feels familiar yet fresh, reflecting the essence of the films while adding a unique poetic flair.

The illustrations by Joel Amat Güell are a perfect match for the verses, enhancing the mood and atmosphere of each poem. Whether it’s a grotesque visual representing The Thing or a playful nod to Shaun of the Dead, the art amplifies the reading experience and brings the horror to life in vivid detail.

Horror Film Poetry does an exceptional job of balancing the chilling aspects of horror with humorous undertones. Lines like “The night ocean is champagne on my skin / Drunk men are jellyfish,” from the Jaws poem, evoke a sense of dread wrapped in a layer of dark humor, capturing the essence of both the film and the genre itself.

Favorite Quotes:
American Psycho: “Her screams and whimpers are the most interesting things she has said all night.”

A Serbian Film: ��God is a camera lens.”

The Beyond: “It’s easier for hell to pass through the eye of a needle, / Than for an innocent woman / To enter the kingdom of heaven.”

Evil Dead: “Evil is in my friend, / But my cleft chin and chainsaw / Are what the dead fear.”

Overall, Horror Film Poetry is a brilliant celebration of horror films, weaving together humor, terror, and art into a compelling collection that fans will love. It serves not only to entertain but also to provoke thought about the nature of horror and its reflection on society. Whether you're a die-hard horror aficionado or just looking for an engaging read, this book is sure to satisfy your cravings for both chills and laughs.

[S.T. Cartledge · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m a poetry fan. I’m not particularly a fan of horror films, certainly not in the way that Christoph Paul is. This collection is a celebration of everything horror film, from the low-budget camp films to the slashers to the psychological thrillers, from the mainstream horror films to the indie films and the obscure films which are primarily viewed by diehard horror fans. The collection is quick and concise, with each poem providing a snapshot of the film it’s dedicated to, paired with an illustration to suit. It captures the memorable or iconic moments of the films, the moments which transcend the films into something more, turning them into mythologies, almost. The poems capture the crux of each film, the essence, and they peel back the layers of each film, exposing not only what they are, but also how it feels as a fan to experience them.

Now, I mentioned that I’m not particularly a fan of horror films, so there are a lot of movies referenced here which I haven’t seen. Some films are simply ingrained into popular culture such that the context is not lost on readers like me, while other films I don’t really get, but Christoph has laid down the foundations for readers to draw enough context to understand the parallels between film and poem. And as simple and comprehensible as these poems are to your everyday reader, this collection is primarily Christoph’s love letter to horror films. No beating around the bush, the theme is simple, the execution is exactly what you expect. Christoph delivers the goods, and while the poetry isn’t popping off the page or moving the reader with feelings or metaphors or elaborate use of poetic techniques or forms, it doesn’t have to. This is a different kind of love poetry, and through this light, Horror Film Poems is a collection which shines bright, splattered with the gore which makes your blood rush and your palms sweat, as all good love poetry should do.

[Jayaprakash Satyamurthy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Christoph Paul is a massive horror movie nerd. The Night of the Living Dead, Suspiria, Chucky, Saw, Let Me In, The VVitch, even Poultrygeist, they're all in here, and many more. For each movie, Paul finds a voice, and something to say, something that tells us about film, genre, fear, hate, love and/or terror. The one on Misery gets a little meta, but with wit and intelligence. Leza Cantoral contributes an apropos ode to Rosemary's Baby.

This volume succeeds in doing justice to its inspirations. I think it does more by way of illumination than a hundred volumes of film analysis, but it's also wonderfully subjective, in that special, universal way poetry can be.

The illustrations are an amazing addition to the book, crisp black and white evocations of the main focus of each movie.

My personal favorite was the poem on The Exorcist. Look it up!

[Kathryn Grace Loves Horror · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fun book full of poems based on different horror films. In the best of them, I often found myself reading them in the character’s voices - Christoph Paul is excellent in getting the tone and language right for many of the films’ heroes and villains.

Many of my favorite horror films, Halloween, Scream, House of 1000 Corpses have poems in here, but two of my favorites were the poems for the movies Spring and Teeth, neither of which I’ve seen yet.

One minor complaint, in the Scream poem, the author keeps referring to “Cindy” instead of “Sidney.”

This one is worth checking out for horror movie fans; you’ll probably find at least a couple of your favorites represented in here.

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went into this book with no expectations because I'm not a horror film buff. In fact, I'm a chicken and I don't watch them. But I love poetry and reading horror. I am very happy with my purchase. It's an enjoyable read, some of the poems make you laugh, some make you think, and many are pretty terrifying. I actually liked some of the poems more than I liked the movie itself. Such a great read. I recommend it to anyone who is a fan of horror and poetry. I love it! The artwork in it is beautifully done as well.

[Belladonna Le Strange · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am very pleased to say this was a very good but quick read. The art was fantastic. I enjoyed it. I read it twice, too, to make sure I didn't skip anything while I was looking at the picture as well. Great for horror FILM fans. A must to add to your collection.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m not a huge fan of poetry but this was a fun read. Some of the movies I haven’t seen or I’m not familiar with so I couldn’t resonate with the poem. However, it was fun to read the poems from movies that I have read.

[Cory Blystone · Rating 5 out of 5]

Christoph Paul reminds us that reading is supposed to be fun, and this book is the best damn literary ride I’ve been on in a while.

[Adele Adams · Rating 2 out of 5]

Really unsure if i like it or not. Very strange nothing like i have read before but i finished it. Not for faint hearted or someone who will get offended

[Cory Alexander · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great Poems

Really liked the humor in the poetry. This book is great for horror movie especially if you like darker humor.

[Siân Pycroft (plumreads__s) · Rating 3 out of 5]

I feel like a lot of these missed their mark with me coz I'm not so up to date with my horror movies, I know, tsk tsk.

My faves were The Mist and Psycho.

Pretty fun and a super quick read!

[Gary Lee · Rating 2 out of 5]

3 stars for the book, but 1 star deducted for referring to the main character of Scream as "Cindy."

[Cooper · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great wee book, perfect for the horror movie buff!

[Charles · Rating 5 out of 5]

First off... horror film poems! For that reason alone if you're a horror fan this book should draw your interest. I for one like the idea of continuing my experience of a favorite horror movie without necessarily watching it over and over again, a crossover adventure exploring a movie's essence and adding to its aesthetic. Novelizations can be fun but poetry has the potential to set off lots of sparks in one's head with its economy of language and use of white space if it's well done. And the poems in this book are well done. Beloved horror movies generate high expectations of treatment in another medium. Having these expectations met is a very individual thing. So if one poem doesn't blow you away or help you see Suspiria in a new way, maybe the poem on Videodrome will. All the poems deliver on wit, playfulness and fresh perspective. They're short, alphabetized for easy reference and intelligent without losing their accessibility.

[Misty · Rating 4 out of 5]

Super fun poetry collection! This is a quick read that can be accomplished in one sitting, worth every word!

[ᥫ᭡ Halloween Ghostie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some of these are too disturbing for my taste 🤮