Maybe you have to be a survivor to really appreciate this book. Maybe that is why I could not put this book down. Even though what happened to me was not violent, nor did I report it, I still went through many of the emotions, inner dialogue, and relationship changes and challenges Alice went through in the long aftermath, and I really enjoyed comparing the similarities and differences in our experiences. I felt myself choke up several times throughout this book because even when it seems she should be doing well -- she won her case, made what seemed like true friends, was able to have healthy relationships -- we see how easily her life crumbled again. In the first several years after a rape, everything seems to come back to the rape and what it did to one's self-esteem and general philosophy. It changes everything you've come to expect from life ("It won't happen to me, smart girls don't get raped."). I went through a self-destructive phase as did Alice; I was with men who were degrading in not so obvious but nonetheless damaging ways, as was Alice. But there is life after rape, and that is the one thing I was left wanting from this book -- I wish she delved into how long it took her to not think about the rape on a daily basis anymore; when and how she met her husband; what she plans to reveal/conceal to her children (if she has any).
It's hard to know how someone who has not been through the R-word would take a book like this, thinking it is too exhibitionistic or histrionic, perhaps a cry for attention or a way to say "This is why I'm worthy of a memoir and your personal tragedies are not." I'm not sure how well this book would educate non-victims either since it is so personal, rather than a rape-crisis-center-type pamphlet ("what to say/not to say to a victim"). But Sebold does depict the range of reactions, and sometimes I find her responses to the "bad reactors" a little curt, like she was built more for emotional survival than I was -- or maybe it is the other way around?
In any case, as a survivor, and having also read 'The Lovely Bones' and enjoying Sebold's style, this was a great read for me. (One more thing: I might not recommend it for people still in the 'victim' stage, too real and raw and who knows what dangerous emotions and crazy thought processes it might provoke, as similar literature did to me in my early stages of recovery).