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How to Marry the Man of Your Choice
Presented with intelligence and peppered with just the right amount of humor, How To Marry The Man Of Your Choice offers women a step-by-step program for making--and then landing--the very best choice in a husband. Topics covered - How to dress to your advantage - How to orchestrate your dates to maximize fun and future potential - Dealing with previous marriages and children - Enhancing and maintaining the right relationship - and more! Through its use of success stories, do and don't lists, and an abundance of insightful advice, How To Marry The Man Of Your Choice will have every wannabe wife walking down the aisle in no time!
- First published in 1987, How To Marry...netted over 153,000 hardcover (0-446-51387-3) copies and the Warner mass market edition (0-446-34788-4), published in 1988, netted over 270,000 copies. This is the first time it has been made available in trade paperback.
- Margaret Kent holds the distinction of being Oprah's first featured guest. In the 1980s she made frequent appearances on all the top-rated shows, including Donahue, Larry King Live, The Regis Philbin Show, Sally Jessy Raphael, The Joan Rivers Show, Cristina, Geraldo, CNN News Tonight, and CBS This Morning.
- Book on relationships and marriage are strong sellers. The Rules (Warner, 1996), which has over 1.8 million copies in print and spawned numerous successful spin-offs, and The Surrendered Wife (Fireside, 2001) were both runaway New York Times bestsellers.
- First published in 1987, How To Marry...netted over 153,000 hardcover (0-446-51387-3) copies and the Warner mass market edition (0-446-34788-4), published in 1988, netted over 270,000 copies. This is the first time it has been made available in trade paperback.
- Margaret Kent holds the distinction of being Oprah's first featured guest. In the 1980s she made frequent appearances on all the top-rated shows, including Donahue, Larry King Live, The Regis Philbin Show, Sally Jessy Raphael, The Joan Rivers Show, Cristina, Geraldo, CNN News Tonight, and CBS This Morning.
- Book on relationships and marriage are strong sellers. The Rules (Warner, 1996), which has over 1.8 million copies in print and spawned numerous successful spin-offs, and The Surrendered Wife (Fireside, 2001) were both runaway New York Times bestsellers.
240 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1985
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
February 6, 2009
This book had a couple of good points, but was mostly horrible advice. The synoposis reads that it is updated for a new generation, but I can't imagine women today buying most of this bull. I realized by the 2nd chapter that I would be reading this book primarily for amusement, and continued reading.
One of my favorite passages was about getting him to think about the future, in the chapter titled "your engagement and wedding." It reads: "These men can be led toward marriage if you can change their focus. If your fellow works too hard.... take him to a cemetery to sober him into reality... Ask him what he'd like his tombstone to say. Ask if he would prefer cremation. Subtly remind him that his next heartbeat may be his last."
Now I've never been married, or engaged, so I can't claim to be an expert, but I believe that conning a man into marrying you because he may die alone is rather messed up.
If you seek such demented wisdom, by all means read this book. If you're looking for actual dating/relationship advice, take the author's words with a grain of salt!
One of my favorite passages was about getting him to think about the future, in the chapter titled "your engagement and wedding." It reads: "These men can be led toward marriage if you can change their focus. If your fellow works too hard.... take him to a cemetery to sober him into reality... Ask him what he'd like his tombstone to say. Ask if he would prefer cremation. Subtly remind him that his next heartbeat may be his last."
Now I've never been married, or engaged, so I can't claim to be an expert, but I believe that conning a man into marrying you because he may die alone is rather messed up.
If you seek such demented wisdom, by all means read this book. If you're looking for actual dating/relationship advice, take the author's words with a grain of salt!
December 15, 2007
I attended her free talk and bought the book. What she was basically saying was that you have to be proactive rather than passive, know yourself and know what you want in order to get a partner you'd be happy with.
October 28, 2007
I'm reading it now, it's interesting. I love the fact that the title is "...the man of your choice" is it b/c the man of your dreams is a fantasy?
Currently Reading
July 24, 2023I'm halfway through the book as of 7/24/2023. I've just been reading it leisurely so I don't know when I will have finished it.
My current thoughts - this book is almost embarrassing for me to carry around. If someone were to see me reading this book in a public space, my anxious mind would automatically assume their judgment was that I was a man-hungry, marriage-striving, outdated-tradition-following individual that wanted to learn trade secrets of the dating world to ultimately capture a partner for a lifelong marriage contract. I also am not the most motivated reader of the category of self-help, which I assume this book would fall under.
However, before you pass judgment on this book, I think if you opened the book and read a few pages you would realize that Margaret Kent does a great job at immediately building rapport for herself as a writer. She describes herself and her success so well, that you instantly have intrigue for what she has to say.
The copy I'm reading is a "Revised and Updated" published in 2005, and while it might sound like a long time ago, I do see how some of her observations can still ring true today.
Setting expectations:
I don't believe that the moment I finish the last page of this book I will go out into society and choose a man to marry within 2 years, as this book seems to claim. I don't think you should hold that expectation or push any such changes in yourself to "achieve" that either.
What I've learned thus far:
I do think I will learn more about how to ask deeper questions in dating to find compatibility, and how to prioritize areas of compatibility. Often I find myself dating and asking trivial questions that probably have no deeper value to me or the person I'm asking. Getting to the root of why a person feels or thinks the way that they do, what they prioritize, what zeniths they carry - these are all things Kent does an amazing job on teaching.
My current thoughts - this book is almost embarrassing for me to carry around. If someone were to see me reading this book in a public space, my anxious mind would automatically assume their judgment was that I was a man-hungry, marriage-striving, outdated-tradition-following individual that wanted to learn trade secrets of the dating world to ultimately capture a partner for a lifelong marriage contract. I also am not the most motivated reader of the category of self-help, which I assume this book would fall under.
However, before you pass judgment on this book, I think if you opened the book and read a few pages you would realize that Margaret Kent does a great job at immediately building rapport for herself as a writer. She describes herself and her success so well, that you instantly have intrigue for what she has to say.
The copy I'm reading is a "Revised and Updated" published in 2005, and while it might sound like a long time ago, I do see how some of her observations can still ring true today.
Setting expectations:
I don't believe that the moment I finish the last page of this book I will go out into society and choose a man to marry within 2 years, as this book seems to claim. I don't think you should hold that expectation or push any such changes in yourself to "achieve" that either.
What I've learned thus far:
I do think I will learn more about how to ask deeper questions in dating to find compatibility, and how to prioritize areas of compatibility. Often I find myself dating and asking trivial questions that probably have no deeper value to me or the person I'm asking. Getting to the root of why a person feels or thinks the way that they do, what they prioritize, what zeniths they carry - these are all things Kent does an amazing job on teaching.
November 2, 2019
I picked this book up at a free neighbourhood library nook because I though the title was hilarious. I would say read this with a HEAVY dose of salt;
“If you spend the night with a man, whether in your home or his, be prepared to make breakfast for him the next morning.”
Whilst there are some surprising nuggets of advice;
“If your zeniths and his are in conflict, move on and find someone else.”
“Show your intelligence whenever possible. You will start to acquire the ‘meeting of the minds’ necessary for a successful marriage.”
“If you spend the night with a man, whether in your home or his, be prepared to make breakfast for him the next morning.”
Whilst there are some surprising nuggets of advice;
“If your zeniths and his are in conflict, move on and find someone else.”
“Show your intelligence whenever possible. You will start to acquire the ‘meeting of the minds’ necessary for a successful marriage.”
Read
April 17, 2025Realmente no le doy ninguna estrella,este libro es realmente repugnante todo el libro en si trata de lo que una mujer debe de "cambiar o mejorar para estar con el hombre de sus sueños",hasta la página 100 habla de la vestimenta y todo lo que dice es que aunque uses faldas blusas o shorts deben ser cortos o mostrar para dejar ala imaginación del hombre "realmente este libro es una estupidez no saben lo enojada que me siento ahora mismo
June 20, 2022
A friend gave me this book 30 years ago 😂 after she got married. I read the book got married and passed along to another friend who also got married after reading the book. Maybe some of the tactics worked, but it may not work for this generation not sure. P.S. people/life was different 30 years ago.
May 3, 2024
Have to admit I bought this book in 1989 due to some bad choices of men I was dating. I followed the books suggestions and within 3 months I married the man I am still married to 33years now. One of the quotes from the book (I believe is from this book) is “it’s not about finding the “right” person, it about “being” the right person. That is absolutely spot on.
October 25, 2020
Wise advise to be followed with great caution.... techniques work, but carry with them a lot of responsibility for a man's emotional attachment to you. Be CAREFUL.... and caring!
November 29, 2022
Que: my mom making me read this book yearly. It’s like she thinks I don’t know what I’m doing ??
August 1, 2008
Not so much about snagging your man, but about communication and the things that take years of varied relationships to learn. I enjoyed it, I think that much of the subject matter applies to all relationships and not just those of married couples. You can never be too good at communicating... Very fast read.
December 17, 2014
o.O
The title was scary, caught my attention, I went ahead and read it all. If any of it works, now I'm less prone to falling for any of this. But seriously I don't think most of it applies nowadays.
The title was scary, caught my attention, I went ahead and read it all. If any of it works, now I'm less prone to falling for any of this. But seriously I don't think most of it applies nowadays.
June 10, 2010
I love the way Margaret Kent put her words and it just manifest in front of you. A really engaging read. A book that I just don't want to put down, and one I will read over and over again.
February 25, 2015
My favorite part was the one about how to deal with conflicts that face many couples and the art of solving problems otherwise the book is so ordinary!
November 22, 2015
This book, was recommended by my father, read it before I got engaged back in 2002!! It was insightful to ask the right questions and to guide the conversations that need to happen before marriage.
July 13, 2017
How to be A Bitch!
Should be titled How to be A Bitch! Just know how to spot narcissists and know that some people are experts at manipulation.
Should be titled How to be A Bitch! Just know how to spot narcissists and know that some people are experts at manipulation.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews