Dads Who Stay and Fight: How to Be a Hero to Your Family

by Greg Trimble

Viral blogger Greg Trimble has reached millions through his blog by writing about topics he's passionate about. But when it's all said and done, he feels most passionate about being a dad. In his debut book, Greg approaches fatherhood in a way that is fun and easy to understand. By drawing upon the wisdom of some of the world's greatest dads, Greg is able to help future dads, new dads, and even seasoned dads leave a legacy, be remembered, and be a hero to their families.

171 pages, Paperback

Published April 11, 2017

Reviews

[Jason Burt · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a fan of @trimblegreg and his blog, I was excited to read this book and it didn't disappoint. If fathers would follow the advice in this book there would be improved relationships in families and society would be stronger. I would highly recommend this book to any current or future fathers!

[Melia · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I think of dads, of course, my own father comes to mind. I find it difficult to put into words the power of a father especially my own. My dad was raised in Hawaii under the watchful eye of his Italian father and loving Hawaiian mother. My father has always been a great example of strength, faith, love, service and many other Christ-like traits. I am eternally grateful to be able to call him “dad.”

I was asked if I would be interested in reading a new book by the author Greg Trimble called “Dads Who Stay and Fight.” I love to read and I was curious if a book written by a father to a father would help me since I am a mother. When it came in the mail, I began to pour over it’s pages, but I couldn’t read it like a regular novel. When I open a book written by Traci Hunter Abramson, Annette K. Larsen or Julianne Donaldson, I can’t put the novel down. I need to find out how it ends and so the rest of the world tends to fade into the background for a few hours as I explore a world of imagination.

This book “Dads Who Stay and Fight” is not my typical leisure reading that helps me unwind sometimes at the end of the day. This book forced me to think, ponder and pray about my own life and how my thoughts and actions effect my own husband who is a dad and my children who call him daddy. Was there lessons to be learned in a book written to fathers? My heart wants to shout “Yes!”

Tim Ballard who founded Operation Underground Railroad wrote the Foreword for this book and he had me hooked from the first page. I have never read a more powerful foreword and to be honest, I haven’t read too many forewords in the 100’s of books that I have read in the past. I was curious to see why Tim Ballard who rescues children from sex trafficking fit into a book about dads. Boy, was I in for an awakening. He was the perfect fit to kick off this fantastic book. I have felt a strong pull towards Operation Underground Railroad as my heart has broken for the millions of children forced into sex trafficking. It is sick and disgusting. My family and I have struggled just putting food on the table and I have often wished I was wealthy. I would give all of my money to help support this organization. To find out how I finally received inspiration on how I can help this organization and eventually help end human trafficking, read here.

There is a tremendous tie between what Tim’s rescue mission is all about and what I feel has inspired Greg Trimble to put into words how a dad can be hero to their family. I don’t want to give away that powerful connection so just go pick up your book today! You can purchase it at Deseret Book store or find it on Amazon.

Let me just share with you some of the highlights from this book. I have to tell you that there is so much in this book that I loved that I began to highlight many sections thinking I could add it into this review, yet by the 4th chapter, I realized I was highlighting almost every other page!

So, let’s get down to some of the reasons why I was so touched by this book. I love how Greg taught how dads and Christ have many similar characteristics. We know that Jesus Christ is our elder brother as well as the creator and father of this earth. He is our advocate with our Heavenly Father and we are taught that if we follow in Jesus Christ’s footsteps, we will be able to be like him and return to live as families forever. At the bottom of page 9, Greg talks about how Jesus Christ knew what he was fighting for. He said that God knew he was “walking into a war zone” and that he was going to “battle for His family… All He had to do to avoid bleeding from every pore… and His impeding Crucifixion was to walk up that hill over into the Judean desert… but He stayed… He fought for His family.”

That begins the theme throughout the book how dads can fight like Christ did for those He loved by fighting for our homes and families. The book is full of powerful stories of fathers and their own personal triumphs and struggles. I love how he shared such a wide range of examples in portraying the different qualities, roles and characteristics of a dad that fights.

Since this would end up being an extremely long post if I was to share all of the thoughts and parts of this book that touched me. I will share a few quotes from the book and leave with my conclusions of the overall impressions and feelings that make me want every mother and every father no matter what religion or race to read and ponder this fantastic book. (Read the rest of my review at http://brightlystreet.com/2017/05/dad...)

[Darrin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy read. Sound advice. Excellent story teller. Well written with no obvious egregious typos/errors (great editing) which is a big deal to me, especially in books that are not published by huge publishing companies. Definitely motivated to implement several things in the book and was an excellent reminder of the things that are really important as a Dad. I’m not super keen on the idea of being a “hero” to my family because I think that is the wrong motivation. My favorite quote from the book was at the end of the chapter titled: “Dads Who Leave a Legacy” and the quote is from Phillip Brooks: “How carefully most men creep into nameless graves, while now and again one or two forget themselves into immortality.” That seems heroic in a way that is worth aspiring to.

[Todd Dunaway · Rating 1 out of 5]

The foreword by Tim Ballard is about the only good thing in this book. The rest is filled with quotes, scriptures, and 1-2 personal stories where the author shares nothing about his own struggles as a father.

I could not relate to him because his writing felt so judgmental. He often brought up stories of other dads that he observed and how they were failing as fathers.

[Troy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A little simplistic in several of the assumptions but there are enough gems in here that I highly recommend it to any dad who wants to evaluate their strengths and areas for improvement.

[Jon Webber · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book, inspiring light, practical advise, well done

[Evan Bird · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like the premise of this book and agree with all of the suggestions about how to be a good dad. However, their delivery throughout the book did not do them justice. There were so many suggestions and so few pages that none of them were covered thoroughly enough. It felt more like a series of blog posts than a cohesive book to really tackle the subject. Also, it felt like every chapter had loose, unsupported claims like "as a dad, the most important thing you can do for your family is ____" (whatever the subject of the chapter is), so his strong language quickly lost credibility with me. Trimble also used sports-related sayings in a similar fashion (e.g., as a dad, not monitoring technology use in your house is like... throwing in the towel, tucking tail and running, punting on 3rd down, etc.) instead of solid claims from credible references. This book could use more strict organization and referencing to unify and strengthen its presented ideas.

[Dan McConkie · Rating 4 out of 5]

My wife suggested this book to me after hearing about it during a church meeting. It is a quick read. While it was somewhat inspiring (I did highlight several quotes and paragraphs through the book) there wasn't a lot of "meat" to it. It was written in a very casual way, similar to a conversation amongst friends. That isn't necessarily bad. In fact, that contributes to the ease of reading as well as practical application of the concepts discussed.

Overall, well worth reading.

[Gil · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quick and Powerful Read

Chapters are quick to read and quite enjoyable. They are written from the perspective of a member of the Church of Jesus Christ, but the principles are universal in application. Anyone who desires some boost and motivation to be a better father should read this book and keep as reference for down times.

[Trevor · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lot of the chapters could have used fewer stories and more concrete examples. But there were some really good ones that made the whole thing worthwhile, in particular the ones on marriage, technology, and protecting your family from worldly influences.

[Kelly L. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Aside from the personal stories, readers won’t learn anything new from the book, but will find valuable and motivating reminders of the important roles and responsibilities of being a father. A worthwhile read for one and all.

[Nancy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoy Greg Trimble' s blog so much, I had to buy his book, and I sent one to both my son and son-in-law. Timely and insightful advice for men who want to be great fathers to their children. Definitely worth the read!

[Tony Joshua · Rating 4 out of 5]

Important

I thank the author for broaching many important topics within this awesome and awful umbrella topic of Dad-hood. Mostly, his prose was spot on, inspiring enlightening, and moved me emotionally. Some of the chapters didn’t stand out to me to be as profound. Thanks Greg!

[Barbara · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book wondering if I should give it to my sons and son-in-law. It is an easy read and I loved it. A lot apply's to parenting in general and just being a good person!

[Don · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a gift to fathers.

[Darin Pierson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good book and great advice. Not a lot of revolutionary advice though.

[Ben Frohlich · Rating 1 out of 5]

I had to force myself to finish this. Not because it was worth reading but because I wanted to finish a book in March.

[Jaron Dunford · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dallin H. Oaks once shared how a friend of his “took his young family on a series of summer vacation trips, including visits to memorable historic sites. At the end of the summer he asked his teenage son which of these good summer activities he enjoyed most. The father learned from the reply, and so did those he told of it. ‘The thing I liked best this summer,’ the boy replied, ‘was the night you and I laid on the lawn and looked at the stars and talked.’ ”[ 3] Simple. Cost effective. Memorable. Your kids don’t care how much money you make! They only care if you care.

Too many of us have our thinking caps on backwards. We live our lives to make our kids’ lives easier. But as we make our kids’ lives easier, we also make our kids’ lives harder.

Let them be creative with what they have, instead of purchasing the creativity for them.

It feels as if the adversary’s number-one strategy in these last days is to get dads to waste their time, instead of investing it in the things of eternal significance.

If the kids only see their dad consuming the creations and services of others, then those kids will probably become great consumers instead of great creators. If the dad is consistently choosing the easy route, then the children will generally choose likewise. Watching a dad do hard things in life, struggle through challenging times, and persist through trials will be some of the most important observations a child can have early in their life.

“You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink” is only partially true. There’s actually a lot you can do to help him drink. What you need to do is “salt the oats” that you’re feeding him. If you lead a thirsty horse to water, there’s a much greater chance that this horse will go ahead and drink. Likewise, you can make your kids thirsty for the things you’re teaching by “salting the oats.”

No one likes to eat food that is presented poorly, regardless of how good someone says it tastes. There’s a trust factor built into their taste buds. If what you’re trying to present to your kids tastes sweet to you, then make sure you present it neatly and carefully

“the best piece of marriage advice I ever received.” “When you get married,” said the man, “don’t try to turn the other person into you.” Simple enough, right?

As Alma was recounting his own repentance and conversion to his son Helaman, Alma gave credit to his own dad, saying, “I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world” (Alma 36: 17). Alma went on to explain that it was the memory of his father teaching about the Atonement of Christ that caused him to cry out to God for repentance and forgiveness. That moment changed Alma’s life forever (Alma 18–24).

When I was playing baseball in college, I had a coach say something to me that I’ll never forget. I think I’d been complaining about something in the dugout when this coach came up to me. “Greg,” he said, “there are two types of people in this life: there are fountains and there are drains. Which one are you?” He later told me that he took that saying from an old-time hustler of a ball player named Rex Hudler.[ 2] Rex Hudler is the epitome of optimism, and people love to be around him. Fountains are continually springing up, giving life and happiness to everyone who surrounds them. Drains, on the other hand, sit in the dark corners hiding from sight, always taking and never giving. They grow moldy, and people might trip over them, unnoticed and incognito. No one ever takes a picture of a drain to remember for later. But fountains … fountains are framed and remembered for years to come.

As President Gordon B. Hinckley once said, “There is nothing that dulls a personality so much as a negative outlook.”[ 3] But it

Good coaches always seem to value the little things that cause the great things to happen. They value and teach consistency. Instead of cheering for the person carrying the football into the end zone, they’re cheering for the person who sacrificed his body and laid down a key block forty yards back.

Technology is a useful servant, but a dangerous master.

Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.

But I’ve finally come up with a rule that brings peace to my mind for any and every Sabbath activity: Always make sacrifices that strengthen your relationship with God and your family. You know you’re violating the Sabbath if you are making sacrifices that weaken those relationships.