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Don't Be A Wife To A Boyfriend: 10 Lessons I Learned When I Was Single
You cook for him, clean for him, and sacrifice for him. There’s only one problem—in reality he’s your boyfriend, but in your mind, you’re already married.
When a woman falls in love, she will give it her all—even if she’s not getting anything in return, especially in the form of a ring! The moment of being fed up and realizing you are giving so much of yourself to someone who doesn’t give the same in return can be unmistakable and painful.
This is not a man-bashing book or a book for women uninterested in the truth. This is for women who look at their relationships with feelings of betrayal, pain, and emptiness and who want to make a change.
Don’t Be a Wife to a Boyfriend: 10 Lessons I Learned When I Was Single aims to help you on your journey to self-discovery and shows you that every relationship failure can offer a moment of truth and clarity. With humor, compassion, and the hard-earned knowledge of experience, Shonda tells you all the things your girlfriends are afraid to, and shares personal stories that will inspire you to live your best life no matter your relationship status.
125 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 23, 2016
809 people are currently reading
1901 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 69 reviews
January 1, 2018
One lame cliché after another
Every single woman has heard all of this before. There is not a single piece of legitimate practical advice in here. Instead the author loved to write out inane conversations she’s had with various people before doling out stock “advice” that can be found on every online listicle and probably in bad fortune cookies all over America. Lots of great relationship books out there. Don’t waste your time on this.
Every single woman has heard all of this before. There is not a single piece of legitimate practical advice in here. Instead the author loved to write out inane conversations she’s had with various people before doling out stock “advice” that can be found on every online listicle and probably in bad fortune cookies all over America. Lots of great relationship books out there. Don’t waste your time on this.
January 3, 2025
This was a quick read & very informative!
March 12, 2019
For this i gave a 2 star for one simple reason, she wrote and everything she wrote about is true. I kept itrying to get something new but i couldn’t. Almost everything written there its either u know about it or its somewhere on the quotes we usually see all over the show. Nothing seriously impressed me except that i wish men especially , can read it just to see how much a girl child needs them as fathers in their lives. That ur baby girl might go around trying to find love in wrong places, seeking for validation everywhere they go. Also the girl child can read to get some advices on how to handle yourself if you had an absent father
August 12, 2018
Great READ! This book hit on so many key points about dating, singleness, and GOD!!!
April 30, 2020
This book is worth the read for ladies struggling with who they are and what they want. I have learnt a lot
July 1, 2021
I was not impressed by this book. There was only 1 chapter on not being a wife to a boyfriend.
There was also way too much God talk. Everything happens for a reason bs. While some of the things she had to say & quoted with scripture, may have related, I think she did it all wrong.
I have mental illnesses and she basically said that anything can be cured through God. Oh and we should just give it God and he will take care of it, so sorry that also go for physical illnesses too? "Whatever chains you are holding onto right now—ex-lover, fatherless home, sexual immorality, sexual molestation, divorce, obesity, low self-esteem, drugs, alcohol, failure, and any others—release those chains and move toward the destiny to which God has called you."
Umm yeah, obviously she has no idea what she is talking about..
There was also way too much God talk. Everything happens for a reason bs. While some of the things she had to say & quoted with scripture, may have related, I think she did it all wrong.
I have mental illnesses and she basically said that anything can be cured through God. Oh and we should just give it God and he will take care of it, so sorry that also go for physical illnesses too? "Whatever chains you are holding onto right now—ex-lover, fatherless home, sexual immorality, sexual molestation, divorce, obesity, low self-esteem, drugs, alcohol, failure, and any others—release those chains and move toward the destiny to which God has called you."
Umm yeah, obviously she has no idea what she is talking about..
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 28, 2023
I learned just how difficult it is to love someone else if you don’t first love yourself. Usually the way we allow others to treat us is a reflection of how much, or how little, we love and value ourselves.
Just because you treat a boyfriend like a husband doesn’t mean he will never marry you; and, just because you don’t treat him like a husband doesn’t mean he will marry you.
It is a very helpful book for every woman out there. So many girls don't know how they should be treated or what kind of importance people should give them. and I loved the way the author talked about self-love. 100% recommended.
Just because you treat a boyfriend like a husband doesn’t mean he will never marry you; and, just because you don’t treat him like a husband doesn’t mean he will marry you.
It is a very helpful book for every woman out there. So many girls don't know how they should be treated or what kind of importance people should give them. and I loved the way the author talked about self-love. 100% recommended.
February 21, 2020
Mind blowing 🤯
This read is for everyone … sometimes it takes a stranger to tell us something our friends have been saying for month of Sunday … I learn an gained so much from this book I laugh cried said girl you to ! A safe place to say me too to know that your not the only one with theses thoughts … each time I put the book down I picked it up an it picked right in my life current blessing an mishaps … thank you
This read is for everyone … sometimes it takes a stranger to tell us something our friends have been saying for month of Sunday … I learn an gained so much from this book I laugh cried said girl you to ! A safe place to say me too to know that your not the only one with theses thoughts … each time I put the book down I picked it up an it picked right in my life current blessing an mishaps … thank you
June 23, 2024
4⭐️|| I love the lessons and experiences shared in this book because I too, can relate. Definitely a good read for younger women who may be lost in the world of love but, it may be all to familiar for one who is seasoned in the world of love, I really appreciate how the author incorporates god into the book, which is why I decided to read it, as my partner and I have decided to walk with god on our journey after many ups and downs realizing we cannot make our relationship work without him❤️
June 29, 2020
Good Tips. Straight to the point
I'm only giving this book 3 stars because it makes a lot of god references , and that's not something I adhere too. Other than that, everything else was on point. I enjoyed how the author told bits about her life prior to her marriage, but didn't give a lot on her past pains. She was straightforward the advice and I liked that .
I'm only giving this book 3 stars because it makes a lot of god references , and that's not something I adhere too. Other than that, everything else was on point. I enjoyed how the author told bits about her life prior to her marriage, but didn't give a lot on her past pains. She was straightforward the advice and I liked that .
March 10, 2023
This was an excellent read.
It was like she looked down in my life and just wrote my story.
Every single person should read this book. No matter your age or status. It gives good examples and very good advice.
There were so many good quotes in it I almost highlighted the entire book.
LOVED IT
It was like she looked down in my life and just wrote my story.
Every single person should read this book. No matter your age or status. It gives good examples and very good advice.
There were so many good quotes in it I almost highlighted the entire book.
LOVED IT
June 13, 2023
Shonda discusses critical and realistic things we tend to miss in relationships. Using her story as an example, she clearly gives practical advise to all women on how to keep their pride, virtue and identity. Shonda tells you that which girlfriends and wives are afraid to say. This book is a lifesaver.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 10, 2025
DNF Idk if I hated this because I started it hoping to finally find the answer to how to just be a good girlfriend without blurring the relationship lines into marriage before the marriage even begins and was completely not expecting this to be a book for birds. I got to about page 30 before I started skimming hoping it would get better. This book should have been titled “don’t be a girlfriend to a situationship!” The information may be useful to someone but it wasn’t to me. This is a book for an insecure woman, who’s desperate for love, and hasn’t learned how to love herself yet. The scenarios I did read, she didn’t even make it to a girlfriend yet. She was just assuming she was one most of the time??? I went into this book hoping it’d be about an actual established and healthy relationship and the proper way to do things before the ring. There is a difference between a wife and girlfriend and no one is talking about it in a healthy way. It’s like we don’t acknowledge that girlfriend is a step before wife. There’s the constant negative connotation-ed reminder that you’re not a wife yet but no info on how to just be a girlfriend for those of us who will become a wife and don’t want to mimic marriage before that is our role. There’s lots of talk on pouring into yourself while you still can but no one talks about how to appropriately support your man before he’s your husband. How much intertwining your lives is too much before you’re truly bound as 1? If you’ve found something with answers please share
December 25, 2023
This book will remain dear to me.
Title - Don't be a wife to a Boyfriend
Author - Shonda Brown White
Genre - Young Adult, Memoir
Format - Ebook
Pages - 124
Rating - 5/5
The cover page says it all! It has past trauma caused by lack of parental love which leads to subconsciously repeat the pattern of pleasing people in order to fill that void. Metamorphosis of Shonda doing the mistakes, repeating them, realising the pattern, focusing on self esteem, and turning towards God and eventually getting what she always wanted holds a concrete theme of focusing on oneself and God. The religious examples and references in the book reminds me of the Islamic stories of Ibrahim (As), Yousuf (As). When Shonda says, "Relationships are 100/100 not 50/50," It's a clear cut warning not to be in delusion that the missing parts of joy will be filled by our Partner. Nurturing the singlehood, not being desperate for relationship, strengthening our relationship with God are some other open themes.
Language is basic and naration has absolute fluidity.
It's a good page turner, Surely not a one time read. Recommended for age groups ranging from teenagers to Adults.
Title - Don't be a wife to a Boyfriend
Author - Shonda Brown White
Genre - Young Adult, Memoir
Format - Ebook
Pages - 124
Rating - 5/5
The cover page says it all! It has past trauma caused by lack of parental love which leads to subconsciously repeat the pattern of pleasing people in order to fill that void. Metamorphosis of Shonda doing the mistakes, repeating them, realising the pattern, focusing on self esteem, and turning towards God and eventually getting what she always wanted holds a concrete theme of focusing on oneself and God. The religious examples and references in the book reminds me of the Islamic stories of Ibrahim (As), Yousuf (As). When Shonda says, "Relationships are 100/100 not 50/50," It's a clear cut warning not to be in delusion that the missing parts of joy will be filled by our Partner. Nurturing the singlehood, not being desperate for relationship, strengthening our relationship with God are some other open themes.
Language is basic and naration has absolute fluidity.
It's a good page turner, Surely not a one time read. Recommended for age groups ranging from teenagers to Adults.
January 3, 2023
A retelling of the author's humdrum life events. Writing is basic, repetitious &often conceited. The subject in the title is addressed in one chapter, the rest of the book is uninspiring talk about Christ &unsought details about her _very ordinary_ husband.
The phrases in quotation marks, written in bold &italics & taking a much bigger space than needed are the least bit interesting &repeated in following paragraphs. If the reader happens to find any of them memorable, they would not need the obvious distinction.
The author tried too hard to come up with the GOODBYE acronym, it was useless &misplaced &at least one of the many 'friends &family members' she consulted about the content &dedicated her acknowledgments to, pointed it out.
The poem included would have been better off kept in her diaries.
Verses were repeated in different parts almost as if they were copied then pasted. Did Shonda even read her own book?
The phrases in quotation marks, written in bold &italics & taking a much bigger space than needed are the least bit interesting &repeated in following paragraphs. If the reader happens to find any of them memorable, they would not need the obvious distinction.
The author tried too hard to come up with the GOODBYE acronym, it was useless &misplaced &at least one of the many 'friends &family members' she consulted about the content &dedicated her acknowledgments to, pointed it out.
The poem included would have been better off kept in her diaries.
Verses were repeated in different parts almost as if they were copied then pasted. Did Shonda even read her own book?
December 20, 2020
Encouragement
I am so thankful to have read this book. I felt as if Shonda was writing it to me and about me. I’ve been single for awhile now and my focus is on God learning to trust in him and having him guide my way. I lost myself at one time and he brought me out of bondage This book is powerful and makes you think about the life you want and to lean on God while enjoying being single and learning to love who we are as individuals and preparing us for the future God has for us. Thank you
I am so thankful to have read this book. I felt as if Shonda was writing it to me and about me. I’ve been single for awhile now and my focus is on God learning to trust in him and having him guide my way. I lost myself at one time and he brought me out of bondage This book is powerful and makes you think about the life you want and to lean on God while enjoying being single and learning to love who we are as individuals and preparing us for the future God has for us. Thank you
October 18, 2018
Sweet Truth
My favorite saying is God loves a truth-teller. That's exactly what Shonda White did. She told her truth which is my story. This book is one of the best relationship accounts to ever be told. I definitely had many take-aways that will help me to be a better me before God and not due to Amy relationship status. Thank you Shonda for speaking sweet truth into my life. I now have the tools to do this God's way.
My favorite saying is God loves a truth-teller. That's exactly what Shonda White did. She told her truth which is my story. This book is one of the best relationship accounts to ever be told. I definitely had many take-aways that will help me to be a better me before God and not due to Amy relationship status. Thank you Shonda for speaking sweet truth into my life. I now have the tools to do this God's way.
November 29, 2024
Thank you, God, for the endurance
Thank you, God, for the endurance, as in childbirth, within the pains and suffering, and the awesomeness that comes along with being able to experience it. Using it to help heal, grow, and heal others, and to use it for the glory of God’s grace and mercy in our lives.” Trust the Process
Thank you, God, for the endurance, as in childbirth, within the pains and suffering, and the awesomeness that comes along with being able to experience it. Using it to help heal, grow, and heal others, and to use it for the glory of God’s grace and mercy in our lives.” Trust the Process
June 24, 2017
Good read
Good quick read. Lot of practical common sense information. It transcends age but I think all young women should read and be reminded from time to time how they are the prize! You don't have to sacrifice yourself to have a mate.
Good quick read. Lot of practical common sense information. It transcends age but I think all young women should read and be reminded from time to time how they are the prize! You don't have to sacrifice yourself to have a mate.
December 30, 2017
Insightful observations.
I finished this book in one day. I enjoyed the openness of the author, whose experiences are similar to mine many ways. There a re mj or typos, which do not detract from the narrative. Definitely a good read.
I finished this book in one day. I enjoyed the openness of the author, whose experiences are similar to mine many ways. There a re mj or typos, which do not detract from the narrative. Definitely a good read.
January 19, 2018
Review
I gave it 5 stars because I could relate to her stories and situations in the book. It has valid point and makes you wonder about what you are doing and what you need to be doing
I gave it 5 stars because I could relate to her stories and situations in the book. It has valid point and makes you wonder about what you are doing and what you need to be doing
March 24, 2018
Fantastic read!!
Love how raw, real and down-to-earth the writing style is. It’s very relatable and is exactly what I need in this single season of my life. Side note: I highlighted a lot lol👌🏿
Love how raw, real and down-to-earth the writing style is. It’s very relatable and is exactly what I need in this single season of my life. Side note: I highlighted a lot lol👌🏿
June 12, 2018
This book made me feel so a lot better due to the fact she experienced all or very similar circumstances...from her self-esteem issues, to feeling like she had to please every man she was interested in....this entire book spoke to me and allowed me to examine myself from someone else's experience. Great book :)
May 26, 2019
Are we sure this wasn’t MY life story??
When I tell you I THANK GOD for confirmation... it has been dripping with it.... thank you for writing this book! Time to walk and keep it pushing ♥️
When I tell you I THANK GOD for confirmation... it has been dripping with it.... thank you for writing this book! Time to walk and keep it pushing ♥️
January 3, 2021
Good read
So happy she found her prince ! And in her wait she found herself and God I’m currently in my wait . I’m ok I seek God first so I know everything I’ve prayed about will come to pass
So happy she found her prince ! And in her wait she found herself and God I’m currently in my wait . I’m ok I seek God first so I know everything I’ve prayed about will come to pass
September 8, 2021
Great read
I like how she told her story and gave a good background as to why she set the rules she set in her life and to know after everything she went through she found just makes me hopeful in my life
I like how she told her story and gave a good background as to why she set the rules she set in her life and to know after everything she went through she found just makes me hopeful in my life
August 9, 2022
Don’t be a wife to a Boyfriend …
Rien de nouveau de ce que je n’ai pas déjà lue, par contre toujours bon de remettre les pendules à l’heure.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Auteure // Shondra Brown White
Genre // Développement Personnel
Pages // 149p ( Kindle )
Rien de nouveau de ce que je n’ai pas déjà lue, par contre toujours bon de remettre les pendules à l’heure.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Auteure // Shondra Brown White
Genre // Développement Personnel
Pages // 149p ( Kindle )
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October 15, 2025Loved this ❣️
Sometimes, we all just need that reminder, that our story is already written and our lives will play out according to his plan, not ours and this book, checked all the boxes.
Stay faithful 🙏🏾
Sometimes, we all just need that reminder, that our story is already written and our lives will play out according to his plan, not ours and this book, checked all the boxes.
Stay faithful 🙏🏾
June 15, 2017
Great book
Such an honest perspective for the modern woman!!! I would recommend to any single woman. Loved it.
Thank you for the encouragement!
Such an honest perspective for the modern woman!!! I would recommend to any single woman. Loved it.
Thank you for the encouragement!
November 30, 2017
Very informative
Displaying 1 - 30 of 69 reviews