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'90s Coming of Age #2
You Are Not Me
Follow Peter into the summer following his senior year to face new beginnings, new friends, and old baggage.
After a tumultuous final year of high school, Peter Mandel needs a break. It's the summer of 1991, and his secret relationship with his ‘best friend’ Adam Algedi is put on hold as Adam goes away to Italy for the summer. On the cusp of adulthood, Peter has a couple of months to explore who he is without Adam at his side.
Enter Daniel McPeak, a slightly older, out, responsible college guy with a posse of gay friends and an attraction for Peter. Drawn into the brave new world of the local gay club, Peter embarks on a whirlwind of experiences—good and bad—which culminate in a hotel room where he has to make the ultimate choice.
But Adam will come back eventually, and there are promises that have to be kept. As autumn draws near and college awaits, can Peter break free of the binds of twisted first love? And what exactly is Daniel's role in his life - a brief temptation, or something more?
After a tumultuous final year of high school, Peter Mandel needs a break. It's the summer of 1991, and his secret relationship with his ‘best friend’ Adam Algedi is put on hold as Adam goes away to Italy for the summer. On the cusp of adulthood, Peter has a couple of months to explore who he is without Adam at his side.
Enter Daniel McPeak, a slightly older, out, responsible college guy with a posse of gay friends and an attraction for Peter. Drawn into the brave new world of the local gay club, Peter embarks on a whirlwind of experiences—good and bad—which culminate in a hotel room where he has to make the ultimate choice.
But Adam will come back eventually, and there are promises that have to be kept. As autumn draws near and college awaits, can Peter break free of the binds of twisted first love? And what exactly is Daniel's role in his life - a brief temptation, or something more?
354 pages, Paperback
First published November 28, 2016
96 people are currently reading
608 people want to read
About the author
Leta Blake
61 books1,774 followersAuthor of the bestselling book Smoky Mountain Dreams and fan favorites Training Season, Will & Patrick Wake Up Married, and Slow Heat, Leta Blake has been captivating M/M Romance readers for over a decade. Whether writing contemporary romance or fantasy, she puts her psychology background to use creating complex characters and love stories that feel real. At home in the Southern U.S., Leta works hard at achieving balance between her writing and her family life.
If you'd like to be among the first to know about new releases, you can sign up for Leta's newsletter here: http://eepurl.com/bdn32H
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 221 reviews
May 16, 2023
Re-read May 2023
Re-read. Aug 2022
******* 5 Stars ******
I don't remember being this pissed when I read this years ago. 😤
I.AM.SO.OVER.ADAM.😤
I just hope the dear author writes a twist where Adam goes for a hike and gets lost! 😤
*****************************************************************
Original rumblings:
Dear Leta Blake,
GR states this as a four-book project, but we only have 2.
It's not that book two MUST have a sequel. I'm quite pleased with the way things turned out. However,
✅ You made us love Pete and all his pals.
✅You gave us hope of getting another two books
✅ And you left us with enough room for more to come. After all, Pete's journey, becoming "a gay man worthy of his own respect." just started.
So, as a reader, I can't help but wonder... It's been what, 4 years since you wrote this?
How does the creative process for a series work? 🤔
Have you started a parallel project and lost interest in Pete?
Are you over with these characters and moved on?
Have you run out of ideas?
Oh, well, I'm really hoping for the last one.
Because I've got this and I'm here to help you out!
✅No more lies.
✅Pete in college out of the closet.
✅Adam grovelling
✅Daniel being a darling.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Renée consolidating her fame.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Pete happy with Daniel.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Daniel's friends forgiving Pete.
✅Enough of those grovels.
✅Sara waking up for life.stop being a bitch
✅Bobby feeling better.
✅Minty finding love.
✅Adam happy.
✅Leslie happy.
✅The End.
Yay to me,
such a great plot!
So, let's make a deal!!!!!!!
Just one more book instead of two?????
What would you say?
Puh-lease, don't feel obligated to follow my list in that particular order.
AND feel free to add a twist here and there. We can't live without those.
Ah!!! Also, make sure Adam grovels, gets a taste of his own medicine, and everything is going to be just fine.
Now, now, no more excuses. I basically wrote book 3 for you.
Riiiight, hope that helped.
You are welcome.
Love,
Jan ( Huge fan ) 😍
Re-read. Aug 2022
******* 5 Stars ******
I don't remember being this pissed when I read this years ago. 😤
I.AM.SO.OVER.ADAM.😤
I just hope the dear author writes a twist where Adam goes for a hike and gets lost! 😤
*****************************************************************
Original rumblings:
Dear Leta Blake,
GR states this as a four-book project, but we only have 2.
It's not that book two MUST have a sequel. I'm quite pleased with the way things turned out. However,
✅ You made us love Pete and all his pals.
✅You gave us hope of getting another two books
✅ And you left us with enough room for more to come. After all, Pete's journey, becoming "a gay man worthy of his own respect." just started.
So, as a reader, I can't help but wonder... It's been what, 4 years since you wrote this?
How does the creative process for a series work? 🤔
Have you started a parallel project and lost interest in Pete?
Are you over with these characters and moved on?
Have you run out of ideas?
Oh, well, I'm really hoping for the last one.
Because I've got this and I'm here to help you out!
✅No more lies.
✅Pete in college out of the closet.
✅Adam grovelling
✅Daniel being a darling.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Renée consolidating her fame.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Pete happy with Daniel.
✅Adam grovelling.
✅Daniel's friends forgiving Pete.
✅Enough of those grovels.
✅Sara waking up for life.
✅Bobby feeling better.
✅Minty finding love.
✅Adam happy.
✅Leslie happy.
✅The End.
Yay to me,
such a great plot!
So, let's make a deal!!!!!!!
Just one more book instead of two?????
What would you say?
Puh-lease, don't feel obligated to follow my list in that particular order.
AND feel free to add a twist here and there. We can't live without those.
Ah!!! Also, make sure Adam grovels, gets a taste of his own medicine, and everything is going to be just fine.
Now, now, no more excuses. I basically wrote book 3 for you.
Riiiight, hope that helped.
You are welcome.
Love,
Jan ( Huge fan ) 😍
June 3, 2024
4.5
Note: You Are Not Me is not a stand-alone novel. It is the second of a three part series, featuring Peter Mandel as he learns how to live his truth. I'll do my best to not spoil too much about book one, here, but do know that I probably won't be 100% successful. And, if you've read the blurb for book 2, you already know more than you should if you're interested in reading this series, but have not yet read Pictures of You. If that last sentence describes you, I recommend you stop reading this review right now.
Still with me? Cool.
This series has had a way of transporting me back to the early 90's when I was a young adult (I'm slightly younger than Daniel) and living in the southern US. The music, the cultural references, the events of the time… I tell people, I'm not nostalgic for that time period at all, and I'm not. But when I think of the things going on right now, I almost miss the innocence we had then. But then I remember the innocence was really just ignorance and I'm glad that if nothing else, we've made it so HIV isn't a death sentence. I'll also mention that I have never cried while listening to Losing My Religion, by REM, until reading this book. In the context of Peter's journey, that song is heartbreaking.
You Are Not Me picks up right where Pictures of You left off. Adam is in Rome and Peter has the summer to get some heavy thinking done and hopefully make some (we're hoping for actual good) decisions. Peter has been hurting and Peter has also hurt others, even if they don't know it, yet, and he needs this summer to just…be, and learn how to breathe again. And learn that he does have a lot more options than he ever thought he would have. He's coming into his own and it is such a beautiful thing to witness.
And I want to share with you how much I loved that Peter made some new friends, through Robert and Daniel, and he got to experience what it was like to be an out gay man. Without the secrets, without the deceptions, without the fear. And he got to know what it felt like to be wanted in the open. Peter, Peter, Peter… I wanted to hug him, I wanted to shake him and I wanted to hug him some more. He's a loyal guy and he's been loyal to Adam, even though Adam hasn't really deserved it.
In my review for Pictures of You, I said that I liked Adam and I really wanted him to learn how to be honest and open. I still want these things for him, but he hasn't managed it yet. In fact, we witness Adam coming apart at the seams. His desperation is heartbreaking, but at the same time, he needs to break apart. To know what he's doing to others. To himself. I'm still rooting for Adam, hoping that he finds his way to living and loving in the open, even though he's been a manipulative bastard. But I still think Adam is not good for Peter, at all. Adam needs to know what it feels like to be left behind.
We met Daniel in Pictures of You and he's a real stand-up guy. A good friend and he's real in so many ways. And while there was an attraction between he and Peter, from the start, nothing came of it in book 1, because Daniel doesn't play games, he doesn't cheat and he doesn't do casual.
Daniel is the kind of human being we should all aspire to be. Is he perfect? No, he's not. But he cares about people. And he walks the walk. Daniel is a student of architecture at the University of Tennessee at Knoxville. Architecture isn't his passion, though. His real gift is his humanity. He volunteers for ARK (AIDS Response Knoxville), and his volunteer work is directly with men and women dying of AIDS. And he's there for his friends, even when they do stupid shit, and he wants the best for everyone. For himself, though, he wants Peter. Even when it hurts him, he wants Peter.
Well, now Peter is on his own, and although he didn't make Adam any promises, he didn't break things off, either. So Peter has some serious soul searching to do to figure out what he wants and who he wants to be. The summer is eye-opening for him, but he still is so conflicted. He doesn't want to betray Adam, but at the same time, he wants to find happiness, himself. But Peter is young and maybe he's not quite ready to do what's right.
You Are Not Me doesn't take short cuts, any more than Pictures of You did. Throughout the book, you know that somehow, sometime, the feces is going to hit the oscillator in an important way. And it does. And I can't tell you when or how, but Peter does figure things out and though the end of You Are Not Me isn't exactly certain, I am very happy with the events as they stand. They give me hope.
I'm looking forward to book 3 of this series. I need to see where these boys are and how they've coped and where they want themselves to be. I can tell that this story has come straight from Leta Blake's soul and it sings to me in ways I can barely articulate. You Are Not Me doesn't end on a huge cliffie, but do keep an open mind and remember what it was like to be that young.
--------------------
ARC of You Are Not Me was generously provided by the author, in exchange for an honest review.
Note: You Are Not Me is not a stand-alone novel. It is the second of a three part series, featuring Peter Mandel as he learns how to live his truth. I'll do my best to not spoil too much about book one, here, but do know that I probably won't be 100% successful. And, if you've read the blurb for book 2, you already know more than you should if you're interested in reading this series, but have not yet read Pictures of You. If that last sentence describes you, I recommend you stop reading this review right now.
Still with me? Cool.
This series has had a way of transporting me back to the early 90's when I was a young adult (I'm slightly younger than Daniel) and living in the southern US. The music, the cultural references, the events of the time… I tell people, I'm not nostalgic for that time period at all, and I'm not. But when I think of the things going on right now, I almost miss the innocence we had then. But then I remember the innocence was really just ignorance and I'm glad that if nothing else, we've made it so HIV isn't a death sentence. I'll also mention that I have never cried while listening to Losing My Religion, by REM, until reading this book. In the context of Peter's journey, that song is heartbreaking.
You Are Not Me picks up right where Pictures of You left off. Adam is in Rome and Peter has the summer to get some heavy thinking done and hopefully make some (we're hoping for actual good) decisions. Peter has been hurting and Peter has also hurt others, even if they don't know it, yet, and he needs this summer to just…be, and learn how to breathe again. And learn that he does have a lot more options than he ever thought he would have. He's coming into his own and it is such a beautiful thing to witness.
And I want to share with you how much I loved that Peter made some new friends, through Robert and Daniel, and he got to experience what it was like to be an out gay man. Without the secrets, without the deceptions, without the fear. And he got to know what it felt like to be wanted in the open. Peter, Peter, Peter… I wanted to hug him, I wanted to shake him and I wanted to hug him some more. He's a loyal guy and he's been loyal to Adam, even though Adam hasn't really deserved it.
In my review for Pictures of You, I said that I liked Adam and I really wanted him to learn how to be honest and open. I still want these things for him, but he hasn't managed it yet. In fact, we witness Adam coming apart at the seams. His desperation is heartbreaking, but at the same time, he needs to break apart. To know what he's doing to others. To himself. I'm still rooting for Adam, hoping that he finds his way to living and loving in the open, even though he's been a manipulative bastard. But I still think Adam is not good for Peter, at all. Adam needs to know what it feels like to be left behind.
We met Daniel in Pictures of You and he's a real stand-up guy. A good friend and he's real in so many ways. And while there was an attraction between he and Peter, from the start, nothing came of it in book 1, because Daniel doesn't play games, he doesn't cheat and he doesn't do casual.
Daniel is the kind of human being we should all aspire to be. Is he perfect? No, he's not. But he cares about people. And he walks the walk. Daniel is a student of architecture at the University of Tennessee at Knoxville. Architecture isn't his passion, though. His real gift is his humanity. He volunteers for ARK (AIDS Response Knoxville), and his volunteer work is directly with men and women dying of AIDS. And he's there for his friends, even when they do stupid shit, and he wants the best for everyone. For himself, though, he wants Peter. Even when it hurts him, he wants Peter.
Well, now Peter is on his own, and although he didn't make Adam any promises, he didn't break things off, either. So Peter has some serious soul searching to do to figure out what he wants and who he wants to be. The summer is eye-opening for him, but he still is so conflicted. He doesn't want to betray Adam, but at the same time, he wants to find happiness, himself. But Peter is young and maybe he's not quite ready to do what's right.
You Are Not Me doesn't take short cuts, any more than Pictures of You did. Throughout the book, you know that somehow, sometime, the feces is going to hit the oscillator in an important way. And it does. And I can't tell you when or how, but Peter does figure things out and though the end of You Are Not Me isn't exactly certain, I am very happy with the events as they stand. They give me hope.
I'm looking forward to book 3 of this series. I need to see where these boys are and how they've coped and where they want themselves to be. I can tell that this story has come straight from Leta Blake's soul and it sings to me in ways I can barely articulate. You Are Not Me doesn't end on a huge cliffie, but do keep an open mind and remember what it was like to be that young.
--------------------
ARC of You Are Not Me was generously provided by the author, in exchange for an honest review.
June 21, 2023
4.32 stars ... This is a very, very well-written trilogy with two very, very unlikable protagonists. Is that possible?!? 🤷♂️ Yeah, I guess it's a thing. I love the story ... I vehemently dislike Peter and Adam and Leslie is an oblivious cliche. The fact that I'm lovin' this so much is all about Leta Blake's amazing writing. 😉
November 17, 2016
I tried to keep this review as spoiler free as possible, but I couldn't avoid giving away plot points about the first book. Proceed with caution.
The year is 1991. R.E.M are releasing "Losing My Religion", the world is dealing with the social and political aftermath of the 80s AIDS, and people are still using a VCR.
For the majority of this book, Adam and Peter aren't together on page. Adam is in Italy, and they talk on the phone frequently (with Adam promising things he can't give, and Peter trying to figure himself out). But while Adam is away, something happens in Peter's life. Something very important
Peter starts making new friends. Gay friends, bisexual friends, friends who aren't afraid to be seen with him, friends that show him the way. For the first time ever, Peter founds himself in a safe community, a place he belongs to. He finds all these things that Adam took from him, or to be precise, never let him discover on his own. It was so beautiful, seeing Peter growing into the man he was meant to be.
And then there's Daniel, the new character. Daniel swept me off my feet! He is kind and confident. He's charming and know what he wants. Daniel just...loves people. And he's falling for Peter. And Peter is falling too, but there's Adam. There's always Adam.
Maybe some of you will want to throttle Peter. I know you will, because I did too. But at the same time I identified with him so hard, and I know a lot of people will. You know the kind of love that you feel deep in your bones, and when it starts to fade away you try to cling to it with everything you have? It's bad for you, but it used to mean the world , and what are you going to do without it? Have you been there? If you have, you will weep with Peter. There's a scene in this book that illustrates this perfectly; it's such a simple scene, but its truth took my breath away.
"Adam’s chair scraped on the tile. His bare feet slapped across to me, but I didn’t look up. I noticed the hair on his toes and the tuft on his arch. I suddenly became anxious that I didn’t have any photos of his feet. Anything could happen. Things could change at any moment. Words could be said that’d end things between us right now. I might even be the one to say those words.
But I had no pictures of his bare feet."
As for Adam...I'm worried for him and he makes my heart hurt. I want him to find happiness, I want him to thrive and show the world what he can do. But I'm no longer on his side. Adam is no good for Peter, and his selfishness and disrespect towards him in this book, made me wonder if he loves him as much as he claims to.
"I already knew what happened when I combined hope with Adam: pain."
The ending of the second book is the beginning of a new chapter. And that's all I'm going to say.
This is such an important and poignant book. An important series, actually. I 've only used the word "epic" to describe ICoS. I'm holding myself back here because there are two more books to go, but right now I can easily see me putting this on my "epic" shelf. The author does not label this as romance, so please know this going in and don't hold it against the book.
Very highly recommended!
*Review cross-posted on Gay Book Reviews.*
May 8, 2023
I LOVE THIS SERIES (this is a revised edition of a previously published book). I ADORE everything about it, and it has gone into my all-time faves pile…
Swoon /5 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
Angst /5 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Steam /5 ♨️♨️♨️♨️
Plot /5 🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐
LOLs /5 🤭🤭
Starting at the end first, which for me is a very unorthodox way of doing a review. This is going to sound weird, but I’m so SOOOOO glad Leta invited me to review these revised editions of the books after writing the next, and final book in this series. Because I adore the main protagonist & voice of the first 2 books, Peter. This book ends like the first one with a hint at potential future happiness for him, and I would have felt profoundly letdown by the lack of HEA for Peter because GOD ALMIGHTY does he go through a lot. He loves Adam (who loves Peter back but also his girlfriend Leslie), with a constancy that you often question whether Adam deserves. Especially when Peter meets Daniel while Adam is in Rome with his family for summer. Daniel is kind & honest & emotionally mature, but despite a luminescent mutual attraction, Peter chooses to stay committed to Adam and his promises. Peter makes a group of friends through Daniel, and these friends know him & he can live his truth with them. And every interaction with Adam reminds Peter of the multitude of lies that he’s forced to agree to be a part of, all for love.
Again, the cast of side characters (family, friend groups) are so vividly painted. I’ve put life completely on hold to devour these books over the last few days and I have RAGED and SOBBED and CHEERED with Peter. Please please please let him have the wonderful happy ending in the next book that he so ABSOLUTELY deserves 💗💗
Check out my reviews and MM content on Instagram, Facebook & Bookbub, all under the same name! I gratefully received an advance copy and this is my honest review.
Swoon /5 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
Angst /5 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Steam /5 ♨️♨️♨️♨️
Plot /5 🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐
LOLs /5 🤭🤭
Starting at the end first, which for me is a very unorthodox way of doing a review. This is going to sound weird, but I’m so SOOOOO glad Leta invited me to review these revised editions of the books after writing the next, and final book in this series. Because I adore the main protagonist & voice of the first 2 books, Peter. This book ends like the first one with a hint at potential future happiness for him, and I would have felt profoundly letdown by the lack of HEA for Peter because GOD ALMIGHTY does he go through a lot. He loves Adam (who loves Peter back but also his girlfriend Leslie), with a constancy that you often question whether Adam deserves. Especially when Peter meets Daniel while Adam is in Rome with his family for summer. Daniel is kind & honest & emotionally mature, but despite a luminescent mutual attraction, Peter chooses to stay committed to Adam and his promises. Peter makes a group of friends through Daniel, and these friends know him & he can live his truth with them. And every interaction with Adam reminds Peter of the multitude of lies that he’s forced to agree to be a part of, all for love.
Again, the cast of side characters (family, friend groups) are so vividly painted. I’ve put life completely on hold to devour these books over the last few days and I have RAGED and SOBBED and CHEERED with Peter. Please please please let him have the wonderful happy ending in the next book that he so ABSOLUTELY deserves 💗💗
Check out my reviews and MM content on Instagram, Facebook & Bookbub, all under the same name! I gratefully received an advance copy and this is my honest review.
January 25, 2020
Amazing. This book has my heart, but in a totally different way than Pictures of You. The first book was full of life events - Peter and Adam meet, they start their senior year in high school, a relationship begins, another relationship begins, Peter meets Robert / Renee, etc.
You Are Not Me is more of a transitional story. Adam is away for the summer, Peter makes new friends, and starts building the foundation for his life as a gay man. The changes are subtle, but they are deep. In watching his friends dancing at the Tilt-a-Whirl:
But I love how Leta Blake lets Peter discover this himself over the course of that summer. Peter thinks at various times:
And then it hits me - the title of this book is YOU ARE NOT ME. We are allowed into Peter's life and so far we have seen him grow from a timid student to a young man just on the cusp of starting college. He has become so much a part of my "internal book life" that I want him to have a good life, find true love, be healthy and happy - but Peter is his own person. And in the same way, we are NOT Adam. We don't really know if he will And Daniel. Sweet Daniel who wants to change the world, help people and be there for them. I want Daniel to have the best of all things, and come to a realization about the decisions he needs to make for that to happen.
Leta Blake has done an extraordinary job of creating these characters and fleshing them out, in all their glorious imperfection. I honestly cannot WAIT for the next book in this amazing series.
I received an ARC from the author, via InDigo Marketing, in exchange for an honest review.
Visit my blog, Sinfully Good Gay Book Reviews
You Are Not Me is more of a transitional story. Adam is away for the summer, Peter makes new friends, and starts building the foundation for his life as a gay man. The changes are subtle, but they are deep. In watching his friends dancing at the Tilt-a-Whirl:
I reached for my camera but of course I’d left it at home. In my mind’s eye, I clicked, clicked, clicked, and captured dozens of beautiful shots of queer joy. Each mental photo felt more and more real, like I was taking pictures, for the very first time, of a world where I could be me. No hiding. No apologies. Just me.In reading the book, it's sometimes hard to remember that Peter is just 18. He's on the path to figuring out so many things, but honestly sometimes I just wanted to shake him and tell him Adam is NO good - he's not worthy of your loyalty or your love.
But I love how Leta Blake lets Peter discover this himself over the course of that summer. Peter thinks at various times:
And then it hits me - the title of this book is YOU ARE NOT ME. We are allowed into Peter's life and so far we have seen him grow from a timid student to a young man just on the cusp of starting college. He has become so much a part of my "internal book life" that I want him to have a good life, find true love, be healthy and happy - but Peter is his own person. And in the same way, we are NOT Adam. We don't really know if he will And Daniel. Sweet Daniel who wants to change the world, help people and be there for them. I want Daniel to have the best of all things, and come to a realization about the decisions he needs to make for that to happen.
Leta Blake has done an extraordinary job of creating these characters and fleshing them out, in all their glorious imperfection. I honestly cannot WAIT for the next book in this amazing series.
I received an ARC from the author, via InDigo Marketing, in exchange for an honest review.
Visit my blog, Sinfully Good Gay Book Reviews
November 24, 2016
I was so upset over book 1. Peter and Adam’s relationship was totally putting me through the wringer, and I admit being one of those ‘Adam haters’, until I realized that Peter did have some responsibility for the way things went between them. As they say - it always takes two to tango!
Book 2 left me a LOT happier, but how, Ms. Blake, how can you leave me at this point in the story with months to wait for the next instalment? I know it’s not a wild cliffhanger or anything, BUT, Good God!!! Didn’t you pick your moment to end book 2 wisely!
I loved ‘You are not Me’. It was awesome to see how Peter progresses, how he makes new friends, how he learns to be himself. It was equally heart-wrenching to find him still hanging on to Adam. His perseverance to give Adam another chance was beyond the call of decency and honesty. And the urge to shake Peter senseless was pretty overwhelming at times.
Particularly when he sees the truth one moment “I already knew what happened when I combined hope with Adam: pain.“ to then go and tell Adam ‘I love you’ the next.
To start with I had a really hard time understanding why Peter feels so strongly that HE has to give Adam another chance. (And so does everyone else in the book btw!) He sticks to his idea of ‘saving Adam’ and of making their ‘relationship’ work like broken clingfilm to its roll. This thought, however, helped me to get what the crux of Peter’s confusion is:
I loved him and I hated him and I didn’t know what to do about that.”
He isn’t only emotionally mixed up, but scared and not ready to cut the chords to his first love. Peter is very young, insecure and full of confused loyalty. And I did understand that. We all have things where we can see that they are wrong, and that we should do the obvious, the more sensible thing, but we simply don’t. Because something is holding us back. Whatever this may be.
It’s not as if Peter didn’t have enough encouragement ‘to see the light’. Daniel is just the nicest guy. He is only a few years older, but so much more put together than Peter. I admired Daniel’s restraint and common sense when it comes to Peter. I think he handles himself and his emotions amazingly well, and I just love him for his humanity and kindness. Sigh.
And I have to mention the UST between Peter and Daniel. OMG. I might have screamed slightly 'unladylike' "Just kiss him!" one or two times. LOL. Brilliantly done!
This is a touching and very genuine tale of self-discovery, of growing up and becoming the person you want to be. Leta Blake's writing is sheer bliss, pulls you in from the first sentence and makes you laugh and cry with Peter.
Fabulous series!
ARC received from author via Indigo Marketing And Design in exchange for an honest review.
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED
Book 2 left me a LOT happier, but how, Ms. Blake, how can you leave me at this point in the story with months to wait for the next instalment? I know it’s not a wild cliffhanger or anything, BUT, Good God!!! Didn’t you pick your moment to end book 2 wisely!
I loved ‘You are not Me’. It was awesome to see how Peter progresses, how he makes new friends, how he learns to be himself. It was equally heart-wrenching to find him still hanging on to Adam. His perseverance to give Adam another chance was beyond the call of decency and honesty. And the urge to shake Peter senseless was pretty overwhelming at times.
Particularly when he sees the truth one moment “I already knew what happened when I combined hope with Adam: pain.“ to then go and tell Adam ‘I love you’ the next.
To start with I had a really hard time understanding why Peter feels so strongly that HE has to give Adam another chance. (And so does everyone else in the book btw!) He sticks to his idea of ‘saving Adam’ and of making their ‘relationship’ work like broken clingfilm to its roll. This thought, however, helped me to get what the crux of Peter’s confusion is:
I loved him and I hated him and I didn’t know what to do about that.”
He isn’t only emotionally mixed up, but scared and not ready to cut the chords to his first love. Peter is very young, insecure and full of confused loyalty. And I did understand that. We all have things where we can see that they are wrong, and that we should do the obvious, the more sensible thing, but we simply don’t. Because something is holding us back. Whatever this may be.
It’s not as if Peter didn’t have enough encouragement ‘to see the light’. Daniel is just the nicest guy. He is only a few years older, but so much more put together than Peter. I admired Daniel’s restraint and common sense when it comes to Peter. I think he handles himself and his emotions amazingly well, and I just love him for his humanity and kindness. Sigh.
And I have to mention the UST between Peter and Daniel. OMG. I might have screamed slightly 'unladylike' "Just kiss him!" one or two times. LOL. Brilliantly done!
This is a touching and very genuine tale of self-discovery, of growing up and becoming the person you want to be. Leta Blake's writing is sheer bliss, pulls you in from the first sentence and makes you laugh and cry with Peter.
Fabulous series!
ARC received from author via Indigo Marketing And Design in exchange for an honest review.
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED
November 6, 2019
4,5 stars rounded up
This is the second book in the series. I've read it right after Pictures of You because I was so curious about Peter's journey. As much as I loved the first book, I was still furious with Adam, but also with Peter's inability to let Adam go.
"Young twisted love" doesn't even cover it!!! I know there are many readers who love Adam and defend him. But I can't feel sorry for him. Of course Peter is to blame too... but I'm so furious with the unfairness!! In the '90s people were so scared to come out. What am I saying here?! Ugh! Right now gay people still struggle to come out and gay marriage is legal...
Anyway, this series is supposed to have 4 books and only 2 are released until now 😔 I haven't seen any info about the next book 😢 Hopefully I won't forget about Peter and Daniel until then 😭
P.S. I so want Peter to end up with Daniel and not Adam 😈😛😁
This is the second book in the series. I've read it right after Pictures of You because I was so curious about Peter's journey. As much as I loved the first book, I was still furious with Adam, but also with Peter's inability to let Adam go.
"Young twisted love" doesn't even cover it!!! I know there are many readers who love Adam and defend him. But I can't feel sorry for him. Of course Peter is to blame too... but I'm so furious with the unfairness!! In the '90s people were so scared to come out. What am I saying here?! Ugh! Right now gay people still struggle to come out and gay marriage is legal...
Anyway, this series is supposed to have 4 books and only 2 are released until now 😔 I haven't seen any info about the next book 😢 Hopefully I won't forget about Peter and Daniel until then 😭
P.S. I so want Peter to end up with Daniel and not Adam 😈😛😁
June 10, 2023
My heart. MY HEART.
Daniel. Sweet sweet Daniel. I’d tell you to forget about Peter because you deserve better, but Peter also deserves better. He is just dumb and loyal. And unworthy of you, as Minty made it very clear, but still. Be patient. Don’t break his dumb little heart. I promise you can be happy together.
Peter. Peter. PETER YOU DUMB STUPID IDIOT MORON. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Adam. I feel for your stupid selfish moronic heart. I do. I want you to be happy. But. You don’t deserve him. You don’t deserve her. You don’t deserve any of them.
Leslie. LES-FUCKING-LEE. HOW DUMB ARE YOU? Does anyone who sleeps with Adam become stupid???you are gorgeous, smart, kind, caring. DUMP HIS SORRY ASS.
My heart. I tell ya. I can’t believe some of you had to wait years after this for book three. I need to start it right now. OMG. I can’t take it.
TLDR: I LOVED THIS SO MUCH. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Daniel. Sweet sweet Daniel. I’d tell you to forget about Peter because you deserve better, but Peter also deserves better. He is just dumb and loyal. And unworthy of you, as Minty made it very clear, but still. Be patient. Don’t break his dumb little heart. I promise you can be happy together.
Peter. Peter. PETER YOU DUMB STUPID IDIOT MORON. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Adam. I feel for your stupid selfish moronic heart. I do. I want you to be happy. But. You don’t deserve him. You don’t deserve her. You don’t deserve any of them.
Leslie. LES-FUCKING-LEE. HOW DUMB ARE YOU? Does anyone who sleeps with Adam become stupid???you are gorgeous, smart, kind, caring. DUMP HIS SORRY ASS.
My heart. I tell ya. I can’t believe some of you had to wait years after this for book three. I need to start it right now. OMG. I can’t take it.
TLDR: I LOVED THIS SO MUCH. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
May 7, 2023
May 7, 2023 - Beginning my second time through this book in preparation for book 3 of this series 😄
🌺🌸🌺🌸🌻🌸🌺🌸🌺
Initial Review from 11/10/2016 -
5 Amazing Stars! I am still - 7 days after finishing this book having trouble putting my full thoughts into a review that would do this book any justice. Leta Blake has written a one of a kind series. Peter, he will make your heart hurt. Adam, you will want to throttle him and you will want him to grow up. Daniel, he is just- perfect.
Peter does a lot of growing in this book. Remember, this is the early 90's-Leta does an excellent job taking us back to the time when AIDS was everywhere, Homophobia and lack of education about AIDS was high, and it was a time of political and religious persecution for gay men. The setting and Era of this book are perfect for the story as we watch Peter come-of-age and start accepting himself, connect with other gay men, experience his first random drunken sex, and even learn to go after what or who he wants. However, while Adam isn't physically around for most of the book he is Always on Peter's mind and always in the way of Peter finding happiness. Yet, you can't totally hate Adam because he serves his purpose for Peter. Adam is that first boyfriend. You know the one. The one you should walk away from, the one who you know isn't what's best for you, but the one you just can't stay away from - until it's time. Adam gives Peter a lot of firsts in this story. So he is a pivotal character.
This story is not a standalone and you must bring tissues while reading!
5Stars!
Now I am dying for book 3 - please Leta, give us book 3!!
❥❥**´¨)
¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•`*Review Copy provided by the Author in exchange for an honest review.
Reviewed by Jaime from Alpha Book Club
🌺🌸🌺🌸🌻🌸🌺🌸🌺
Initial Review from 11/10/2016 -
5 Amazing Stars! I am still - 7 days after finishing this book having trouble putting my full thoughts into a review that would do this book any justice. Leta Blake has written a one of a kind series. Peter, he will make your heart hurt. Adam, you will want to throttle him and you will want him to grow up. Daniel, he is just- perfect.
Peter does a lot of growing in this book. Remember, this is the early 90's-Leta does an excellent job taking us back to the time when AIDS was everywhere, Homophobia and lack of education about AIDS was high, and it was a time of political and religious persecution for gay men. The setting and Era of this book are perfect for the story as we watch Peter come-of-age and start accepting himself, connect with other gay men, experience his first random drunken sex, and even learn to go after what or who he wants. However, while Adam isn't physically around for most of the book he is Always on Peter's mind and always in the way of Peter finding happiness. Yet, you can't totally hate Adam because he serves his purpose for Peter. Adam is that first boyfriend. You know the one. The one you should walk away from, the one who you know isn't what's best for you, but the one you just can't stay away from - until it's time. Adam gives Peter a lot of firsts in this story. So he is a pivotal character.
This story is not a standalone and you must bring tissues while reading!
5Stars!
Now I am dying for book 3 - please Leta, give us book 3!!
❥❥**´¨)
¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•`*Review Copy provided by the Author in exchange for an honest review.
Reviewed by Jaime from Alpha Book Club
December 19, 2022
WE HAVE AN ETA FOR THE FINAL BOOK!!!
November 30, 2023 — so close and yet so far 🥲
***
While I don’t disagree with the people saying that this could be a satisfactory ending of Peter’s story, I see it more as a pause, myself.
I’ve read these two books in quick succession, and for me, this one felt a little like the middle part of a bigger novel. Not because it dragged, far from it, but because compared to book 1, there was way more character development and soul-searching here. Since one of the, hm, crucial variables had temporarily left the picture, the plot focused more on Peter working through some things on his own. And as hard as it was to read the thoughts of an emotionally fragile young man trying to find a way to fix — or get out of — his toxic relationship (which were SO on point, Ms Blake, you are a genius), it became clear there is a light somewhere at the end of that long tunnel. Nothing that would magically make things right, but it’s a start.
It’ll be really hard to let go of these characters. 😭 Peter came so far since the beginning of book 1, but I wanted to stay with him just a little longer — see him going to college, hanging out with his friends, and finally becoming someone he can fully accept and respect.
It was obviously too soon for the one romantic relationship I want for Peter to truly develop here, but there was so much potential for another book. Also, it goes without saying that someone needs to do some serious groveling, and I do mean serious, kneeling-on-grits groveling. I really need to see that. 😊
I hope you pick this series back up someday soon, Ms Blake. Don’t leave your readers hanging, please give us just one more book. 🙏
November 30, 2023 — so close and yet so far 🥲
***
While I don’t disagree with the people saying that this could be a satisfactory ending of Peter’s story, I see it more as a pause, myself.
I’ve read these two books in quick succession, and for me, this one felt a little like the middle part of a bigger novel. Not because it dragged, far from it, but because compared to book 1, there was way more character development and soul-searching here. Since one of the, hm, crucial variables had temporarily left the picture, the plot focused more on Peter working through some things on his own. And as hard as it was to read the thoughts of an emotionally fragile young man trying to find a way to fix — or get out of — his toxic relationship (which were SO on point, Ms Blake, you are a genius), it became clear there is a light somewhere at the end of that long tunnel. Nothing that would magically make things right, but it’s a start.
It’ll be really hard to let go of these characters. 😭 Peter came so far since the beginning of book 1, but I wanted to stay with him just a little longer — see him going to college, hanging out with his friends, and finally becoming someone he can fully accept and respect.
It was obviously too soon for the one romantic relationship I want for Peter to truly develop here, but there was so much potential for another book. Also, it goes without saying that someone needs to do some serious groveling, and I do mean serious, kneeling-on-grits groveling. I really need to see that. 😊
I hope you pick this series back up someday soon, Ms Blake. Don’t leave your readers hanging, please give us just one more book. 🙏
June 27, 2024
4.5 stars
This book made me so angry! But still, I loved it a lot. Thanks to Leta Blake’s great writing.
- Leslie: poor girl, you don’t deserve this shit. But how can you be so blind?
- Peter: you stupid moron. How can you be so naive and dumb?
- Daniel: I love you. You’re so caring and responsible. You’re to good for Peter!
- Adam: you selfish fucker!
Great side characters (Peter’s new friends and Mike)
“I saw you this summer with your friends. I don’t think you saw me, though. You were walking down the Strip with your gay pals, and you looked happy. The happiest I’d ever seen you.” He smiled sadly. “I was proud you’d found people you weren’t ashamed to be yourself with.” (Mike)
Thumbs up for Peter’s parents!
“Don’t look so surprised. I notice a lot of things now. For example, how you don’t run down the stairs when Adam calls these days. Or how you’ve barely talked about your upcoming trip to see him next weekend. Which has led me to wonder if that has anything to do with all those pictures you’ve got on your pinboard. Especially the ones of a handsome fellow with dark blond hair and brown eyes.” (Peter’s mom)
I listened some parts of this book in audio. The narrator, Michael Ferraiuolo, is great. I hope book #3 is soon available on audible.
This book made me so angry! But still, I loved it a lot. Thanks to Leta Blake’s great writing.
- Leslie: poor girl, you don’t deserve this shit. But how can you be so blind?
- Peter: you stupid moron. How can you be so naive and dumb?
- Daniel: I love you. You’re so caring and responsible. You’re to good for Peter!
- Adam: you selfish fucker!
Great side characters (Peter’s new friends and Mike)
“I saw you this summer with your friends. I don’t think you saw me, though. You were walking down the Strip with your gay pals, and you looked happy. The happiest I’d ever seen you.” He smiled sadly. “I was proud you’d found people you weren’t ashamed to be yourself with.” (Mike)
Thumbs up for Peter’s parents!
“Don’t look so surprised. I notice a lot of things now. For example, how you don’t run down the stairs when Adam calls these days. Or how you’ve barely talked about your upcoming trip to see him next weekend. Which has led me to wonder if that has anything to do with all those pictures you’ve got on your pinboard. Especially the ones of a handsome fellow with dark blond hair and brown eyes.” (Peter’s mom)
I listened some parts of this book in audio. The narrator, Michael Ferraiuolo, is great. I hope book #3 is soon available on audible.
May 18, 2023
✰ 4 stars ✰
“What did it mean to love one person and have a crush on another?
What did it mean when you wanted to give someone another shot, but you also wanted to see what the world was like without him?
What was loyalty worth when the other person in the equation wasn’t loyal to you?”
To all the readers who had to wait six years since the release of You Are Not Me for the final conclusion to this series, you have my utmost respect - I tip my hat to each and everyone of you. The fact that reading the two available parts within a span of two weeks has exhausted and exasperated me, I can't even begin to imagine how stressful the time has been for all of you. Leta Blake - without question, is a talented writer - she is so skilled at bringing out such an intense reaction from within me - for the unpleasant or the agreeable - there is a gnawing in my heart that won't be appeased till I read what future awaits Peter.
“I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but this breaks my heart. I hate that you’re willing to accept so much less than you deserve. Why don’t you think you deserve to be somebody’s everything? Some boy’s everything?”
A small part of me understands why Peter behaved the way that he did - for someone, who has had a difficult time growing up, even before he met Adam - who has been bullied at a young age for simply being the way he was - his first love is Adam. Even if he's conflicted about his own inner feelings - that range of wanting to live life - he wants to give Adam the benefit of the doubt - the indecisiveness of his behavior is so realistically believable that I can't even fault him for wanting to try to make it work. I get it, I do - it still doesn't mean I have to like it...
“I loved him and I hated him and I didn’t know what to do about that.”
And yet, he's still not being directly honest with Adam either, by not even informing him about Daniel. In a way, he is unwittingly leading Daniel on, someone who's openly expressed interested in, someone who knows about his situation, but yet, the two of them give in to temptation - risk their friendship for the sake of one night. And again, I can't hate him for it - who am I to be so judgmental, because no one is perfect - we all have made mistakes in our life - I mean, isn't that all a part of growing up?? The parts that makes us live life - the good and the bad - the ups and the downs - whether we like it or not.
“I love you. You know that, right? You know how much I need you, don’t you? You’re the only person who really knows me.”
“I know.”
He was quiet before whispering, “Tell me you love me. Tell me you know I need you.”
“I love you,” I whispered, but I wasn’t sure I even meant it anymore. “I know you need me.”
I wonder, though, if Peter had not experienced a very traumatic experience while Adam was away - would his feelings and reaction towards Adam's advances have been altered the way that it was. Because, even now, it felt that all Adam really wanted from Peter was a relationship based solely on sex - for his own sexual pleasure. Was he even with Peter - just because he knew about Peter's own homosexuality?? Was Peter simply an escape - an outlet for his own repressed and suppressed conflicting thoughts on himself?
And yet, still having Leslie as a girlfriend - displaying outward jealousy towards Peter's personality changes - I didn't like any of his behavior - and yet, the rational part of me keeps whispering 'but do you know his side of the story?' Does the author even allow Peter or Adam to actually talk about it once during their entire summer of phone calls? So is it alright then, for Peter to give in to temptation, to flirt around with the possibility of a more meaningful relationship - but still holding out for a future with his first love??
“Number one: your eyes. Number two: your laugh.” He threw up his hands, laughing. “Number three: I never know what to expect from you.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You’re a constant surprise. I never expected you and then you showed up at Robert’s and I knew the second I saw you that I wanted to know you better. Since then, you just keep surprising me. You’re a conundrum and I want to solve you. And I want to get you naked.”
Oh Daniel, the sweet, kind and caring soul that you have - a reluctant participant caught up in a forbidden love affair you want to be the winner of. It's so tragic, so unfair that you had to fall in love with the one person already taken by someone else. And to have your own personal family issues that weighs so heavily on you - to know that being attracted to Peter - wanting to even be with Peter - is morally wrong - despite how hard you try to fight it. 😔😔 And yet, still as understanding and forgiving as you are - you still look at Peter with that hopeful want of a plea that 'why can't you choose me'
“I wasn’t sure what he saw in me, or why he wanted me too. Maybe it was pheromones, or maybe it was something else, but the only thing between a naked Daniel and me was my loyalty to Adam—and my fear of letting go, of moving on too soon.
My fear of making another huge mistake.”
I loved the supporting cast - the friendship Peter was able to form in his summer of discovery. Each of them was so character-driven, so well-rounded, so vibrant with a zest for life, radiating 90's vibes that I absolutely adore and relate. Even if I'm a child of the late 90s, there's a certain thrill that runs in my veins when I read about songs I grew up listening to, movies that I've watched...Yes, I too cannot stand 'What About Bob?' - please don't get me started on that film! 😩😩
And also to see the bonds of friendship form or be tested - to see Peter's relationships with each of them - to explore his sexuality in new ground - to be comfortable to express himself at a gay club - to be out and proud - even if he has to deal with repercussions of certain actions, that in the long run, were an essential part of him realizing that not everything is black and white even within the LGBTQ community. But, to have friends on his side - whether they were straight or gay - who supported him or looked out for him and cared for his well-being, it was a critical wake-up call for Peter. For in the long run, it would help become a better person than he was before.
“He deserved that chance. We both did. He was my first love and that didn’t just end.”
The discussion of AIDS also played a very big part of the narrative - it was the 1990s - the fear was prevalent and it is a heavy topic under much scrutiny. Peter finally being more receptive to what was happening around him with open eyes - to realize the gravity of the current situation - knowing that it's not only his life that was changing, but the world's. And yet, there is a hint of foreboding in each mention, in every moment of interaction with the subject that makes me slightly fearful of what's to come. 🥺🥺
“I’m sorry for that. I shouldn’t judge people I’ve never met. I’ve been up half the night afraid for my son. I’m feeling overprotective,” Dad said with an edge.”
I was relieved that there was one less thing Peter had to worry about and that was his parents being accepting and open to his sexuality - because, let's face it, Leta Blake did us all a favor by cutting him some slack in this department. Because, I can't even imagine how stressful it would have been for Peter to have to deal with everything else and not have his parents on his side. But, I liked it - even if they were over-bearing at times, or showing more interest in Peter's romantic life more than he would have liked - at least they cared.
Despite their reservations and own personal issues, at least they were trying to be there for Peter - to emphasize the importance of safe sex - to make sure he looked out for himself - to allow himself to be more honest and open about his struggles. For them, to be so forward-thinking, so understanding towards Peter - when there were others who weren't as fortunate - made me appreciate that Peter was lucky in this matter. 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Did I like this more than the first part? No. But, my dislike for it is not at all for the writing - it is the story, itself. Sometimes I felt as confused as Peter was about his feelings - because, truly 'Peter, I am not you'. 💔💔 I just feel so sorry and heart-broken for you and still so frustrated with you; it is a testament to Leta Blake's writing that she is able to evoke such conflicted feelings within my heart. And it pains me that it is so realistically believable and frustratingly heart-breaking, that I can't even find myself to fault either of the characters involved - all of them deserve better. This book was nothing short of an exhaustive roller-coaster of emotions - and I can't help but wonder if am I mentally or even emotionally prepared for it's conclusion?
“My heart and mind raced with thoughts of the coming autumn.”
Me too, Peter, me too... 😢😢
“What did it mean to love one person and have a crush on another?
What did it mean when you wanted to give someone another shot, but you also wanted to see what the world was like without him?
What was loyalty worth when the other person in the equation wasn’t loyal to you?”
To all the readers who had to wait six years since the release of You Are Not Me for the final conclusion to this series, you have my utmost respect - I tip my hat to each and everyone of you. The fact that reading the two available parts within a span of two weeks has exhausted and exasperated me, I can't even begin to imagine how stressful the time has been for all of you. Leta Blake - without question, is a talented writer - she is so skilled at bringing out such an intense reaction from within me - for the unpleasant or the agreeable - there is a gnawing in my heart that won't be appeased till I read what future awaits Peter.
“I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but this breaks my heart. I hate that you’re willing to accept so much less than you deserve. Why don’t you think you deserve to be somebody’s everything? Some boy’s everything?”
A small part of me understands why Peter behaved the way that he did - for someone, who has had a difficult time growing up, even before he met Adam - who has been bullied at a young age for simply being the way he was - his first love is Adam. Even if he's conflicted about his own inner feelings - that range of wanting to live life - he wants to give Adam the benefit of the doubt - the indecisiveness of his behavior is so realistically believable that I can't even fault him for wanting to try to make it work. I get it, I do - it still doesn't mean I have to like it...
“I loved him and I hated him and I didn’t know what to do about that.”
And yet, he's still not being directly honest with Adam either, by not even informing him about Daniel. In a way, he is unwittingly leading Daniel on, someone who's openly expressed interested in, someone who knows about his situation, but yet, the two of them give in to temptation - risk their friendship for the sake of one night. And again, I can't hate him for it - who am I to be so judgmental, because no one is perfect - we all have made mistakes in our life - I mean, isn't that all a part of growing up?? The parts that makes us live life - the good and the bad - the ups and the downs - whether we like it or not.
“I love you. You know that, right? You know how much I need you, don’t you? You’re the only person who really knows me.”
“I know.”
He was quiet before whispering, “Tell me you love me. Tell me you know I need you.”
“I love you,” I whispered, but I wasn’t sure I even meant it anymore. “I know you need me.”
I wonder, though, if Peter had not experienced a very traumatic experience while Adam was away - would his feelings and reaction towards Adam's advances have been altered the way that it was. Because, even now, it felt that all Adam really wanted from Peter was a relationship based solely on sex - for his own sexual pleasure. Was he even with Peter - just because he knew about Peter's own homosexuality?? Was Peter simply an escape - an outlet for his own repressed and suppressed conflicting thoughts on himself?
And yet, still having Leslie as a girlfriend - displaying outward jealousy towards Peter's personality changes - I didn't like any of his behavior - and yet, the rational part of me keeps whispering 'but do you know his side of the story?' Does the author even allow Peter or Adam to actually talk about it once during their entire summer of phone calls? So is it alright then, for Peter to give in to temptation, to flirt around with the possibility of a more meaningful relationship - but still holding out for a future with his first love??
“Number one: your eyes. Number two: your laugh.” He threw up his hands, laughing. “Number three: I never know what to expect from you.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You’re a constant surprise. I never expected you and then you showed up at Robert’s and I knew the second I saw you that I wanted to know you better. Since then, you just keep surprising me. You’re a conundrum and I want to solve you. And I want to get you naked.”
Oh Daniel, the sweet, kind and caring soul that you have - a reluctant participant caught up in a forbidden love affair you want to be the winner of. It's so tragic, so unfair that you had to fall in love with the one person already taken by someone else. And to have your own personal family issues that weighs so heavily on you - to know that being attracted to Peter - wanting to even be with Peter - is morally wrong - despite how hard you try to fight it. 😔😔 And yet, still as understanding and forgiving as you are - you still look at Peter with that hopeful want of a plea that 'why can't you choose me'
“I wasn’t sure what he saw in me, or why he wanted me too. Maybe it was pheromones, or maybe it was something else, but the only thing between a naked Daniel and me was my loyalty to Adam—and my fear of letting go, of moving on too soon.
My fear of making another huge mistake.”
I loved the supporting cast - the friendship Peter was able to form in his summer of discovery. Each of them was so character-driven, so well-rounded, so vibrant with a zest for life, radiating 90's vibes that I absolutely adore and relate. Even if I'm a child of the late 90s, there's a certain thrill that runs in my veins when I read about songs I grew up listening to, movies that I've watched...Yes, I too cannot stand 'What About Bob?' - please don't get me started on that film! 😩😩
And also to see the bonds of friendship form or be tested - to see Peter's relationships with each of them - to explore his sexuality in new ground - to be comfortable to express himself at a gay club - to be out and proud - even if he has to deal with repercussions of certain actions, that in the long run, were an essential part of him realizing that not everything is black and white even within the LGBTQ community. But, to have friends on his side - whether they were straight or gay - who supported him or looked out for him and cared for his well-being, it was a critical wake-up call for Peter. For in the long run, it would help become a better person than he was before.
“He deserved that chance. We both did. He was my first love and that didn’t just end.”
The discussion of AIDS also played a very big part of the narrative - it was the 1990s - the fear was prevalent and it is a heavy topic under much scrutiny. Peter finally being more receptive to what was happening around him with open eyes - to realize the gravity of the current situation - knowing that it's not only his life that was changing, but the world's. And yet, there is a hint of foreboding in each mention, in every moment of interaction with the subject that makes me slightly fearful of what's to come. 🥺🥺
“I’m sorry for that. I shouldn’t judge people I’ve never met. I’ve been up half the night afraid for my son. I’m feeling overprotective,” Dad said with an edge.”
I was relieved that there was one less thing Peter had to worry about and that was his parents being accepting and open to his sexuality - because, let's face it, Leta Blake did us all a favor by cutting him some slack in this department. Because, I can't even imagine how stressful it would have been for Peter to have to deal with everything else and not have his parents on his side. But, I liked it - even if they were over-bearing at times, or showing more interest in Peter's romantic life more than he would have liked - at least they cared.
Despite their reservations and own personal issues, at least they were trying to be there for Peter - to emphasize the importance of safe sex - to make sure he looked out for himself - to allow himself to be more honest and open about his struggles. For them, to be so forward-thinking, so understanding towards Peter - when there were others who weren't as fortunate - made me appreciate that Peter was lucky in this matter. 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Did I like this more than the first part? No. But, my dislike for it is not at all for the writing - it is the story, itself. Sometimes I felt as confused as Peter was about his feelings - because, truly 'Peter, I am not you'. 💔💔 I just feel so sorry and heart-broken for you and still so frustrated with you; it is a testament to Leta Blake's writing that she is able to evoke such conflicted feelings within my heart. And it pains me that it is so realistically believable and frustratingly heart-breaking, that I can't even find myself to fault either of the characters involved - all of them deserve better. This book was nothing short of an exhaustive roller-coaster of emotions - and I can't help but wonder if am I mentally or even emotionally prepared for it's conclusion?
“My heart and mind raced with thoughts of the coming autumn.”
Me too, Peter, me too... 😢😢
May 23, 2023
4.5 stars
So good but a really intense read for me. Peter, you're putting my poor heart through the wringer!
So good but a really intense read for me. Peter, you're putting my poor heart through the wringer!
May 11, 2023
Spoilers ahead! This is a continuation, not a standalone. It picks up right where book #1 left off, so don't read this book (or my review, really) before you've read Pictures of You.
I love these types of stories. The kind where you watch the characters change and grow and make mistakes and learn from them. Peter was at a huge point of transition in his life - that summer after high school and before college when some of the burdens your parents had shouldered for you all your life became yours to carry and there was this wide open, and scary, expanse of possibility stretched out in front of you. Adam was gone for the summer and Peter finally had the chance to explore what being gay meant for him when it wasn't constantly tucked behind a mountain of deceit. I'd hoped that Adam being on a different continent would mean not having to grit my teeth through more of his lies, but unfortunately we had phones and snail mail in the 90's so Adam was still very much present in this book, albeit from a refreshing distance. I'll just say that absence does not always make the heart grow fonder and it's entirely too easy to gaslight a person when you don't have to look them in the eye.
I was so happy to see Peter spread his wings a bit in this book, but the tether he'd attached to Adam kept him from truly moving forward. There were so many times when I wanted to scream at him to open his eyes and see what was so plainly obvious to everyone but him (and poor Leslie), but I also remembered being his age and under the spell of a charming boy (I did his laundry after his summer in Poland so that he'd look nice for his new girlfriend 🙄). Adam said just enough of the right things, veiling his intentions (or lack thereof) with pretty words and empty promises, to inspire hope in Peter that things would be different when he got back. The way he convinced Peter that he needed and loved him more than anyone else was heartbreaking and infuriating. I wanted it to fall apart so bad, but hated knowing Peter wouldn't be left unscathed once it did.
I loved getting to see so much of the side characters in this book. Barry's patience was unmatched and the way he bent to every single one of Robert/Renee's whims was so sweet. And Robert's unwavering support of all his friends softened the delivery of some harsh truths that Peter needed to hear. I was so glad that Peter had both of those men in his life to look out for him. Daniel was...ugh, Peter - wake up! And of course, Minty, Windy and Antonio stole every scene they were in. Especially Minty, who was mercurial and unpredictable and fiercely protective of his friends. These characters brought so much depth and joy to this book and helped Peter see what embracing his sexuality could look like without someone consistently holding him back.
I feel awful for the readers who have waited years for the last book in this series. While the end wasn't technically a cliffhanger, it was pretty obvious the story wasn't over and there were at least two huge loose ends in need of tying up. I'm so glad Peter decided to talk to the author again because these books are so good and he deserves his happy beginning.
I received a copy of this book from Gay Romance Reviews and this is my honest, unbiased review.
I love these types of stories. The kind where you watch the characters change and grow and make mistakes and learn from them. Peter was at a huge point of transition in his life - that summer after high school and before college when some of the burdens your parents had shouldered for you all your life became yours to carry and there was this wide open, and scary, expanse of possibility stretched out in front of you. Adam was gone for the summer and Peter finally had the chance to explore what being gay meant for him when it wasn't constantly tucked behind a mountain of deceit. I'd hoped that Adam being on a different continent would mean not having to grit my teeth through more of his lies, but unfortunately we had phones and snail mail in the 90's so Adam was still very much present in this book, albeit from a refreshing distance. I'll just say that absence does not always make the heart grow fonder and it's entirely too easy to gaslight a person when you don't have to look them in the eye.
I was so happy to see Peter spread his wings a bit in this book, but the tether he'd attached to Adam kept him from truly moving forward. There were so many times when I wanted to scream at him to open his eyes and see what was so plainly obvious to everyone but him (and poor Leslie), but I also remembered being his age and under the spell of a charming boy (I did his laundry after his summer in Poland so that he'd look nice for his new girlfriend 🙄). Adam said just enough of the right things, veiling his intentions (or lack thereof) with pretty words and empty promises, to inspire hope in Peter that things would be different when he got back. The way he convinced Peter that he needed and loved him more than anyone else was heartbreaking and infuriating. I wanted it to fall apart so bad, but hated knowing Peter wouldn't be left unscathed once it did.
I loved getting to see so much of the side characters in this book. Barry's patience was unmatched and the way he bent to every single one of Robert/Renee's whims was so sweet. And Robert's unwavering support of all his friends softened the delivery of some harsh truths that Peter needed to hear. I was so glad that Peter had both of those men in his life to look out for him. Daniel was...ugh, Peter - wake up! And of course, Minty, Windy and Antonio stole every scene they were in. Especially Minty, who was mercurial and unpredictable and fiercely protective of his friends. These characters brought so much depth and joy to this book and helped Peter see what embracing his sexuality could look like without someone consistently holding him back.
I feel awful for the readers who have waited years for the last book in this series. While the end wasn't technically a cliffhanger, it was pretty obvious the story wasn't over and there were at least two huge loose ends in need of tying up. I'm so glad Peter decided to talk to the author again because these books are so good and he deserves his happy beginning.
I received a copy of this book from Gay Romance Reviews and this is my honest, unbiased review.
March 13, 2019
RECENSIONE QUI: https://thereadingslove.blogspot.com/...
Può un romanzo straziare per dolcezza e bellezza? Leggendo "Tu non sei me" l'unica risposta è assolutamente sì! Perché leggere dell'estate del 1991 di Peter tocca le corde del cuore, le scuote, le strizza, le fa vibrare e ti lascia con una fortissimo bisogno di avere di più, di sapere e scoprire. Peter si racconta intimamente, appassionatamente mettendo a nudo le sue insicurezze e paure, la sua voglia di dare una svolta, la confusione che lo attanaglia in quella che è l'estate della transizione alla vita adulta e forse del cambiamento. Adam è lontano in Italia, con la tristezza di un cuore nuovamente deluso Peter cerca di pianificare la sua estate mettendo da parte le emozioni, nessun sentimento, nessuna delusione. Uscito allo scoperto con i suoi genitori un nuovo rapporto di dialogo e accettazione nasce tra lui ed una madre per troppo tempo assente, il passato di lei ha riportato traumi e dolori ma una madre sa quando mettere da parte la paura ed impegnarsi per l'amore di un figlio e quello che ne nasce è un confronto aperto e commovente. Peter si lancia non senza timore in nuove esperienze, incontra nuovi amici gay con cui sentirsi libero, frequenta club gay assaporando nuove sensazioni di appagamento ed accettazione, attraverso momenti belli e brutti vive esperienze che lo portano a mettere in discussione se stesso e il suo futuro. Cresce Peter, cambia ma il legame con il suo primo amore, quel senso di lealtà ed il dovere di dare una seconda possibilità al suo cuore lo porta a vivere in una confusione costante. Il suo cuore e le sue emozioni lo fanno vibrare per Daniel; meraviglioso, solido e dolce ragazzo ma il suo cervello non vuole lasciare la speranza di una redenzione di Adam ed un autunno diverso dove il muro di bugie e sotterfugi crollerà. Confusione, speranza, serenità e sofferenza sono il caleidoscopio di emozioni che accompagnano la crescita di un ragazzo alle sue prime esperienze lontano dall'influenza tossica di Adam che anche da lontano riesce a manipolare, ingannare e tenere legato a sé Peter. L'autrice grazie anche ad un'eccellente traduzione trasporta il lettore dentro la storia facendogli vivere intensamente ogni attimo grazie allo stile fluido e denso di descrizioni accurate sia di quello che circonda Peter, sia di ogni sua emozione e pensiero. L'empatia suscitata da ogni personaggio è merito della bravura della Blake nel caratterizzarli perfettamente sotto ogni aspetto bello o brutto che sia. La franchezza a volte cruda e la spontaneità con cui si evolve la storia porta a scoprire gli aspetti più lascivi e liberi del mondo gay come quelli più duri e sofferti come il tema della violenza omofoba o l'HIV e AIDS, temi reali con cui ogni ragazzo deve fare i conti e si deve tutelare. Peter vive la libertà, assapora l'eccitazione della scoperta, si scontra con la realtà della malattia e della morte, la crescita e le esperienze portano scelte a volte dolorose ma che devono essere fatte, non c’è un modo giusto o sbagliato, questa è la vita…
CONTINUA SUL NOSTRO BLOG. VENITE A TROVARCI
https://thereadingslove.blogspot.com/
Può un romanzo straziare per dolcezza e bellezza? Leggendo "Tu non sei me" l'unica risposta è assolutamente sì! Perché leggere dell'estate del 1991 di Peter tocca le corde del cuore, le scuote, le strizza, le fa vibrare e ti lascia con una fortissimo bisogno di avere di più, di sapere e scoprire. Peter si racconta intimamente, appassionatamente mettendo a nudo le sue insicurezze e paure, la sua voglia di dare una svolta, la confusione che lo attanaglia in quella che è l'estate della transizione alla vita adulta e forse del cambiamento. Adam è lontano in Italia, con la tristezza di un cuore nuovamente deluso Peter cerca di pianificare la sua estate mettendo da parte le emozioni, nessun sentimento, nessuna delusione. Uscito allo scoperto con i suoi genitori un nuovo rapporto di dialogo e accettazione nasce tra lui ed una madre per troppo tempo assente, il passato di lei ha riportato traumi e dolori ma una madre sa quando mettere da parte la paura ed impegnarsi per l'amore di un figlio e quello che ne nasce è un confronto aperto e commovente. Peter si lancia non senza timore in nuove esperienze, incontra nuovi amici gay con cui sentirsi libero, frequenta club gay assaporando nuove sensazioni di appagamento ed accettazione, attraverso momenti belli e brutti vive esperienze che lo portano a mettere in discussione se stesso e il suo futuro. Cresce Peter, cambia ma il legame con il suo primo amore, quel senso di lealtà ed il dovere di dare una seconda possibilità al suo cuore lo porta a vivere in una confusione costante. Il suo cuore e le sue emozioni lo fanno vibrare per Daniel; meraviglioso, solido e dolce ragazzo ma il suo cervello non vuole lasciare la speranza di una redenzione di Adam ed un autunno diverso dove il muro di bugie e sotterfugi crollerà. Confusione, speranza, serenità e sofferenza sono il caleidoscopio di emozioni che accompagnano la crescita di un ragazzo alle sue prime esperienze lontano dall'influenza tossica di Adam che anche da lontano riesce a manipolare, ingannare e tenere legato a sé Peter. L'autrice grazie anche ad un'eccellente traduzione trasporta il lettore dentro la storia facendogli vivere intensamente ogni attimo grazie allo stile fluido e denso di descrizioni accurate sia di quello che circonda Peter, sia di ogni sua emozione e pensiero. L'empatia suscitata da ogni personaggio è merito della bravura della Blake nel caratterizzarli perfettamente sotto ogni aspetto bello o brutto che sia. La franchezza a volte cruda e la spontaneità con cui si evolve la storia porta a scoprire gli aspetti più lascivi e liberi del mondo gay come quelli più duri e sofferti come il tema della violenza omofoba o l'HIV e AIDS, temi reali con cui ogni ragazzo deve fare i conti e si deve tutelare. Peter vive la libertà, assapora l'eccitazione della scoperta, si scontra con la realtà della malattia e della morte, la crescita e le esperienze portano scelte a volte dolorose ma che devono essere fatte, non c’è un modo giusto o sbagliato, questa è la vita…
CONTINUA SUL NOSTRO BLOG. VENITE A TROVARCI
https://thereadingslove.blogspot.com/
November 25, 2023
Book safety, content warnings, and tropes down below.
“First love is sweet, but good love is sweeter.”
This book really put me through every emotion under the sun. I felt burning anger, I cried (a LOT), and I even laughed a couple times. I will admit that our main dude, Peter, wasn’t always easy to like and root for in this book, but you also can’t help but love him. I wanted to shake him and hug him all at the same time. He’s so real and flawed in this, and just trying to figure himself out, all while dealing with a manipulative (I would even say abusive) boyfriend. He’s dealing with immense feelings of guilt, growing feelings for someone else while still trying to stay loyal to a disloyal boyfriend. Yeah, it’s a lot. It’s very much worth it, though.
There were men out there like me, men whose only crime was love, and for the expression of that love they were dying.
I think I mentioned this in my review for Pictures of You as well, but there’s just something about this trilogy that feels important. Like it’s a story that needs to be heard. It continuously rips your heart out, but you can’t stop reading either.
Maybe it’d be easier if he hated me. Maybe I’d deserve it. After all I’d done someone should hate me. Sometimes I sure did.
It was good to see Peter take charge a bit, stand up for himself, and make new friends. However, when he messes up he does so epically, and it was equally painful to witness these things at times. I feel like I talk (and think) in circles when it comes to this trilogy, but it really is one you need to experience for yourself. I’m hoping to start the third book very soon, because I am beyond ready to experience Peter’s HEA. We both need it.
And as pink bloomed in the east, I just wanted to hear his voice again. Be held in his arms again. Hear him laugh and tell me everything was all right. He was good at big lies like that.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Love triangle
Coming of age
Historical
Romance
Push and pull
Only one bed
Set in the 90’s
Book 2/3
High angst
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
Vomiting
Death of a pet (on page, natural causes)
Drugging (GHB)
Unsafe sex
Homophobia
Cheating
Discussions of HIV and AIDS
Side character with AIDS
Intense feelings of guilt
Mentions of the death of a parent (past, off page)
Club hookups with dubious consent (under the influence of GHB)
Alcoholic parent (relapse)
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: Yes, both Peter and Adam cheat on each other.
OM/OW drama: Yes. Peter starts something with Daniel (MC Peter ends up with) in this book. The same situation with Adam and his girlfriend from book 1 still applies to this one. See my review for Pictures of You for more details.
Breakup: Yes
POV: 1st person, single POV
Genre: Historical/coming of age/romance
Strict roles or versatile: Versatile (no switching on page)
MCs age: Peter and Adam are both 19. Daniel is 22.
“I don’t need to be taken care of,” I said again, my ego smarting. “I know.” Daniel slid his fingers down the side of my face gently. “But why don’t you let me anyway? Would it be so bad?”
No one came to my defense. Not even me.
“[…] making the right choice can feel like a cop-out, especially when you’ve spent a lot of time justifying making a bad one. […]”
“First love is sweet, but good love is sweeter.”
This book really put me through every emotion under the sun. I felt burning anger, I cried (a LOT), and I even laughed a couple times. I will admit that our main dude, Peter, wasn’t always easy to like and root for in this book, but you also can’t help but love him. I wanted to shake him and hug him all at the same time. He’s so real and flawed in this, and just trying to figure himself out, all while dealing with a manipulative (I would even say abusive) boyfriend. He’s dealing with immense feelings of guilt, growing feelings for someone else while still trying to stay loyal to a disloyal boyfriend. Yeah, it’s a lot. It’s very much worth it, though.
There were men out there like me, men whose only crime was love, and for the expression of that love they were dying.
I think I mentioned this in my review for Pictures of You as well, but there’s just something about this trilogy that feels important. Like it’s a story that needs to be heard. It continuously rips your heart out, but you can’t stop reading either.
Maybe it’d be easier if he hated me. Maybe I’d deserve it. After all I’d done someone should hate me. Sometimes I sure did.
It was good to see Peter take charge a bit, stand up for himself, and make new friends. However, when he messes up he does so epically, and it was equally painful to witness these things at times. I feel like I talk (and think) in circles when it comes to this trilogy, but it really is one you need to experience for yourself. I’m hoping to start the third book very soon, because I am beyond ready to experience Peter’s HEA. We both need it.
And as pink bloomed in the east, I just wanted to hear his voice again. Be held in his arms again. Hear him laugh and tell me everything was all right. He was good at big lies like that.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Love triangle
Coming of age
Historical
Romance
Push and pull
Only one bed
Set in the 90’s
Book 2/3
High angst
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
Vomiting
Death of a pet (on page, natural causes)
Drugging (GHB)
Unsafe sex
Homophobia
Cheating
Discussions of HIV and AIDS
Side character with AIDS
Intense feelings of guilt
Mentions of the death of a parent (past, off page)
Club hookups with dubious consent (under the influence of GHB)
Alcoholic parent (relapse)
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: Yes, both Peter and Adam cheat on each other.
OM/OW drama: Yes. Peter starts something with Daniel (MC Peter ends up with) in this book. The same situation with Adam and his girlfriend from book 1 still applies to this one. See my review for Pictures of You for more details.
Breakup: Yes
POV: 1st person, single POV
Genre: Historical/coming of age/romance
Strict roles or versatile: Versatile (no switching on page)
MCs age: Peter and Adam are both 19. Daniel is 22.
“I don’t need to be taken care of,” I said again, my ego smarting. “I know.” Daniel slid his fingers down the side of my face gently. “But why don’t you let me anyway? Would it be so bad?”
No one came to my defense. Not even me.
“[…] making the right choice can feel like a cop-out, especially when you’ve spent a lot of time justifying making a bad one. […]”
May 14, 2023
***Update January 2023. Leta has promised that this series will come to a conclusion this year [the sooner the better 🎉] with one more story for Peter, not two. I for one cannot wait to see him get his well-deserved HEA with Daniel...hopefully🤞🤞🤞***
**Book Review**
I'm wrecked...Leta, you've put me through the emotional wringer...again. Worth so much more than 5 stars. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
What can I say?? If you like YA and haven't started this series, why the hell not?? It's just amazing and Peter, our MC?? Well, I couldn't decide whether to smack him, strangle him or just give him huge hugs [sometimes all three at once 🤯]. He really came of age during this story, and had to do some very painful soul searching and quick growing up. Date rape drugs, PWA's [persons with AIDS] and heartbreak...he encountered them all and still lives to tell the tale, thank goodness.
My hopes for his future continue to blossom cos he finally, FINALLY [hallelujah 🎉🎉] gets that all Adam wants is for Peter to be his 'bit on the side' whilst presenting a normal boyfriend/girlfriend face with Leslie to everyone else . Do I still think Adam loves Peter in his own way?? Sadly, yes I do, but everything always has to be on Adam's terms, which IS not and SHOULD not be the way love works at all and obviously isn't fair to anyone but Adam.
As far as Peter's 'future' with Daniel [💜💜] is concerned, well I hope to God there is one!! Now that his parents have woken up [hooray, put the flags out!! 🌈🌈🌈] and accept without question who their son is, how difficult everything has been for him and how little they've done to help him, they're 100% behind him and woe betide anyone who hurts their son. All the secondary characters are fabulous [I do worry about Minty though, it seems he's hellbent on self-destruction], and so happy that Robert/Renee is a huge hit!!
**Book Review**
I'm wrecked...Leta, you've put me through the emotional wringer...again. Worth so much more than 5 stars. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
What can I say?? If you like YA and haven't started this series, why the hell not?? It's just amazing and Peter, our MC?? Well, I couldn't decide whether to smack him, strangle him or just give him huge hugs [sometimes all three at once 🤯]. He really came of age during this story, and had to do some very painful soul searching and quick growing up. Date rape drugs, PWA's [persons with AIDS] and heartbreak...he encountered them all and still lives to tell the tale, thank goodness.
My hopes for his future continue to blossom cos he finally, FINALLY [hallelujah 🎉🎉] gets that all Adam wants is for Peter to be his 'bit on the side' whilst presenting a normal boyfriend/girlfriend face with Leslie to everyone else . Do I still think Adam loves Peter in his own way?? Sadly, yes I do, but everything always has to be on Adam's terms, which IS not and SHOULD not be the way love works at all and obviously isn't fair to anyone but Adam.
As far as Peter's 'future' with Daniel [💜💜] is concerned, well I hope to God there is one!! Now that his parents have woken up [hooray, put the flags out!! 🌈🌈🌈] and accept without question who their son is, how difficult everything has been for him and how little they've done to help him, they're 100% behind him and woe betide anyone who hurts their son. All the secondary characters are fabulous [I do worry about Minty though, it seems he's hellbent on self-destruction], and so happy that Robert/Renee is a huge hit!!
November 29, 2016
4.5 stars
I loved the first book in the series and I went on and on, to anyone who would listen, about how great it was. I'm super happy to say that this book is just as good. This story picks up right after the other one ended. Adam is out of the country for the summer and Peter is on his own. He spends his time working and doing his photography.
Peter's lonely without Adam but the infrequent telephone calls and letters make Peter start to realize that he was lonely even with Adam and their group of friends because none of them actually really knew Peter. Peter makes new friends through his employer and Daniel. This group of friends start to make Peter look at things differently. He starts to see that there are things outside of Adam (thank the heavens) and they take him along for some new experiences.
Lot's of things happen in this and I tell you, the mom in me almost had a heart attack more than once, at some of the things Peter does. But, the magic of this series to me, is how much the writing makes me remember my own teen/college days. I wish I could say I always made good decisions but honestly it's a miracle that nothing bad ever happened to me. (There was this one time a friend and I went out on a boat in the middle of the night, in the middle of the ocean with two guys we had just met......gah...miracle!) Anyways......so Peter makes some bad decisions and puts up with yet more crap from Adam but as he does he starts really questioning the man he wants to become. He starts asking himself some tough questions and when he doesn't like the answers he starts making changes. They come slowly and painfully. For both Peter and the reader. (Your heart's not getting out of this book without getting hurt either.)
I don't want to spoiler anything so I'm not going to mention much more about the plot. This book has some super emotional scenes but it wasn't as heavy to me as book one. There is at least some light at the end of the tunnel in this one. I loved every minute of this and I'm anxiously awaiting the next book.
**ARC received through IndiGo Marketing and Design in exchange for an honest review**
I loved the first book in the series and I went on and on, to anyone who would listen, about how great it was. I'm super happy to say that this book is just as good. This story picks up right after the other one ended. Adam is out of the country for the summer and Peter is on his own. He spends his time working and doing his photography.
Peter's lonely without Adam but the infrequent telephone calls and letters make Peter start to realize that he was lonely even with Adam and their group of friends because none of them actually really knew Peter. Peter makes new friends through his employer and Daniel. This group of friends start to make Peter look at things differently. He starts to see that there are things outside of Adam (thank the heavens) and they take him along for some new experiences.
Lot's of things happen in this and I tell you, the mom in me almost had a heart attack more than once, at some of the things Peter does. But, the magic of this series to me, is how much the writing makes me remember my own teen/college days. I wish I could say I always made good decisions but honestly it's a miracle that nothing bad ever happened to me. (There was this one time a friend and I went out on a boat in the middle of the night, in the middle of the ocean with two guys we had just met......gah...miracle!) Anyways......so Peter makes some bad decisions and puts up with yet more crap from Adam but as he does he starts really questioning the man he wants to become. He starts asking himself some tough questions and when he doesn't like the answers he starts making changes. They come slowly and painfully. For both Peter and the reader. (Your heart's not getting out of this book without getting hurt either.)
I don't want to spoiler anything so I'm not going to mention much more about the plot. This book has some super emotional scenes but it wasn't as heavy to me as book one. There is at least some light at the end of the tunnel in this one. I loved every minute of this and I'm anxiously awaiting the next book.
**ARC received through IndiGo Marketing and Design in exchange for an honest review**
July 21, 2019
Relectura en papel. 14 de julio 2019
Las alegrías más grandes que podría darme el MM, sin orden de preferencia:
- Novela gráfica de Captive Prince.
- Adaptación a la pantalla de HIM (pero que sea una producción europea, eh? Nada de fundidos en negro ni sábanas hasta la cintura).
- La tercera y cuarta entrega de esta serie. Estoy por mandarle a Leta Blake el vídeo ese de Sara Montiel: "Te lo pido de rodillaaaaasss...."
Qué puedo decir, REAMO este libro, it ticks ALL my boxes.
**********
I'm loving this series, I love Peter and I'm enjoying following him in his journey so much... Thank you, Leta, for creating such a real and lovable character.
Me está encantando esta serie, hacía bastante que no disfrutaba así de una lectura.
Espero reseñar como se merece pronto.
Peter me tiene atrapada <3 <3 <3
Las alegrías más grandes que podría darme el MM, sin orden de preferencia:
- Novela gráfica de Captive Prince.
- Adaptación a la pantalla de HIM (pero que sea una producción europea, eh? Nada de fundidos en negro ni sábanas hasta la cintura).
- La tercera y cuarta entrega de esta serie. Estoy por mandarle a Leta Blake el vídeo ese de Sara Montiel: "Te lo pido de rodillaaaaasss...."
Qué puedo decir, REAMO este libro, it ticks ALL my boxes.
**********
I'm loving this series, I love Peter and I'm enjoying following him in his journey so much... Thank you, Leta, for creating such a real and lovable character.
Me está encantando esta serie, hacía bastante que no disfrutaba así de una lectura.
Espero reseñar como se merece pronto.
Peter me tiene atrapada <3 <3 <3
January 18, 2025
As I listened to this book on my commute, I imagine I was a sight to behold for neighboring drivers with the way I was openly vocalizing and physically expressing my concerns / intense exasperation 😂
Gosh, I have so much empathy for Peter - so scared of regrets, loyal almost to a fault, needing a definitive sign which path he’s meant for in the endless sea of what ifs. Thank goodness I am free from the burden of cliffhangers and can proceed to book 3 without delay!
Gosh, I have so much empathy for Peter - so scared of regrets, loyal almost to a fault, needing a definitive sign which path he’s meant for in the endless sea of what ifs. Thank goodness I am free from the burden of cliffhangers and can proceed to book 3 without delay!
May 18, 2023
There'll be spoilers for book one in this review so please keep that in mind if you haven't read it yet!
You Are Not Me continues off two weeks after the end of Pictures of You, Adam has gone to Rome and Peter is starting his summer alone. Peter knows things with Adam can't continue the way they've been going, but he still has a bit of hope that they'll work out somehow, so he's gonna wait until fall to figure things out. Until then hes going to continue working for Robert, and work on making some gay friends too (Roberts orders).
This book is essentially about Peter becoming his own person away from Adam. He becomes more independent, makes some friends, makes some big mistakes, but every step of the way he learns more and more about himself and his worth. Daniel becomes a bigger part of Adam's life too, along with his friends Minty, Windy, and Antonio. They really help Peter realise how great it can be to be out and not have to hide his sexuality from the world. Daniel, the sweet angel he is, also shows Peter what its like to be around someone who respects him, and could treat him right if he was willing to let go ofthe trash Adam.
Overall this book was so satisfying for me after all the stress of book one. Not that this book is totally stress free, but it is Adam free for the most of it which was good enough for me. The ending has me so excited for whats to come in the final book, and I can't wait to read it.
You Are Not Me continues off two weeks after the end of Pictures of You, Adam has gone to Rome and Peter is starting his summer alone. Peter knows things with Adam can't continue the way they've been going, but he still has a bit of hope that they'll work out somehow, so he's gonna wait until fall to figure things out. Until then hes going to continue working for Robert, and work on making some gay friends too (Roberts orders).
This book is essentially about Peter becoming his own person away from Adam. He becomes more independent, makes some friends, makes some big mistakes, but every step of the way he learns more and more about himself and his worth. Daniel becomes a bigger part of Adam's life too, along with his friends Minty, Windy, and Antonio. They really help Peter realise how great it can be to be out and not have to hide his sexuality from the world. Daniel, the sweet angel he is, also shows Peter what its like to be around someone who respects him, and could treat him right if he was willing to let go of
Overall this book was so satisfying for me after all the stress of book one. Not that this book is totally stress free, but it is Adam free for the most of it which was good enough for me. The ending has me so excited for whats to come in the final book, and I can't wait to read it.
November 29, 2016
This was my Zhush!!!! Leta Blake is am Auto-buy author for me. This book just highlights everything I love about her words and characters.
Definitely a favorite of 2016. I think I tried to read it in one sitting, but work got in the way! Leta Blake's pen game is sickening. She damn near had me using an entire box of Kleenex! Okay, I used about 3/4 of the box. By the end, I just wanted it to be over for everyone. This damn cliffy is going to kill me.
I loved everything about this! Here's some checkpoints on the awesomeness that was book 2 in this amazing series so far.
√ I am uber in love with Daniel.
√ Minty should be my new best friend.
√ Mike is amazaeballs.
√ Peter is Peter.
√ Minty, Antonio, Windy, Barry, Robert is my life.
√ I loved Peter's ideal of love and hope.
√ Daniel better get an HEA after all of this.
√ I'm never sad to see Adam go.
√ His selfishness new no bounds.
√ Jeremy should die a painful death.
√ I liked Bobby.
√ I cried for Harry.
√ I might conisder buying a tutu in honor of Minty.
√ I totally wanted to hulk rage on Adam by the end of this book.
I am so in love with everything that happened in this book. I cried so many times during it, and I wasn't as mad at Peter unlike book one. I think Peter did a lot of growing this book. He's on his own for the summer while Adam is away in Rome. Peter is deciding to take his life into his own hands. He wants to experience things as a Gay man. I think it was hard for me to not want to get angry at all his mistakes but they were his to make. I adore his father so much. I am even at a little bit of peace with his mother. I am happy at the progress that they were able to make as a family. I don't think Peter realizes how he lucked out on parents and being okay with his sexuality. I loved seeing Peter's vulnerabilities in this book. In book one, he showed them alot, but since this was from Peter's pov entirely I think we got to see inside his head way more.
You Are Not Me is an emotional rollercoaster. It picks up immediately after book one. Peter is alone with his thoughts for the summer. Adam is still Adam. In book one, I was kinda rooting for him, but by the end of this book he's still the manipulating P.O.S that he always is. He doesn't know what he's doing mentally and emotionally to Peter. Yeah, Adam isn't to blame for everything, but he's played such a major part of his own demise that his shamefulness and guilt ways heavy on his mind! I get Peter wanting to stick with Adam to show him that their love can overcome anything, it made me so mad at times because Peter has this grandiose love mindset that he wasn't able to see that he can be this guy for someone that's more deserving. Leta does a wonderful job at creating these flawed characters who we all can relate to in some way.
This was a more transitional story for Peter. He's on the cusp of being an Adult and starting school. He's ventured out of all of his comfort zones. He's gone after things he wants, and explained in absolute detail on why he wants the things that he does. I don't know if this is the end to Adam. Adam is that guy who's going to be married with children and a secret profile on Grindr. It sickens me that he doesn't think about destroying the two people he's involved with. I won't go into spoilery details on the plot. Just know that this book is definitely A+ material. I am so looking forward to book three, and more tears. I really hope a few of my guys get an Hea, or a book about them. Highly recommend this series!
December 1, 2016
Pictures of You and You Are Not Me are without a doubt my favorite reads this year! And I’ve read quite a few books ;)
The second book in the '90s Coming of Age series picks up right where we left off in Pictures of You. Adam is in Rome for the summer with his family. He's still hiding his relationship with Peter and dating Leslie.
Peter is left behind in Knoxville trying to figure out what to do now that high school is over. He's still working for Robert and still taking lots of pictures with his Leica, but he decides he needs some "gay" friends. Some people he can be himself with, unlike his high school friends that still don't know the truth.
He starts spending more time a Tilt-a-Whirl and becomes friends with Daniel's friends. You remember dreamy Daniel from the first book? Sigh. He's still just as dreamy. And he happens to have a crush on our boy Peter. Peter, who's still dating Adam and wants to give him one more chance to make things right when he returns this fall. So yeah, things are kind of complicated.
My favorite quote from the book is from Bobby to Peter...
"You're like a heat-seeking missile for drama, aren't you?"
Isn't that the truth? Complications, lies and so much angst your heart will ache. But rest assured, Peter will find some closure and a much needed "happy for now" before his summer is over.
I can’t say it enough: I highly recommend this series!!!
The second book in the '90s Coming of Age series picks up right where we left off in Pictures of You. Adam is in Rome for the summer with his family. He's still hiding his relationship with Peter and dating Leslie.
Peter is left behind in Knoxville trying to figure out what to do now that high school is over. He's still working for Robert and still taking lots of pictures with his Leica, but he decides he needs some "gay" friends. Some people he can be himself with, unlike his high school friends that still don't know the truth.
He starts spending more time a Tilt-a-Whirl and becomes friends with Daniel's friends. You remember dreamy Daniel from the first book? Sigh. He's still just as dreamy. And he happens to have a crush on our boy Peter. Peter, who's still dating Adam and wants to give him one more chance to make things right when he returns this fall. So yeah, things are kind of complicated.
My favorite quote from the book is from Bobby to Peter...
"You're like a heat-seeking missile for drama, aren't you?"
Isn't that the truth? Complications, lies and so much angst your heart will ache. But rest assured, Peter will find some closure and a much needed "happy for now" before his summer is over.
I can’t say it enough: I highly recommend this series!!!
October 2, 2024
I don't know if I really, really like Daniel, or I just REALLY, REALLY hate Adam. Either way, I was rooting for Peter to cheat the ENTIRE time.
So many wins in this one.
90% less Adam. And many of the times he shows up, he's getting his ass handed to him. Have I told y'all recently about the goodness of God?
I swear, I hate that guy so much, he has me revisiting religion.
Peter's all over the place in this one. Still a Dumb Fuck™ about Adam, but a dumb fuck that's questioning.
Daniel is......everything. Still a green flag, makes a few (welcome) mistakes but knows when to draw the line.
And the ending???? God. I used to pray for times like these.
I really hope book 3 is what I'm hoping it is and not a(nother) lesson in why I should quit while I'm ahead with HFN couples.
They're not a couple couple, but the way it ends in this is hopeful. And I will throw my phone at a wall if this results in some AIDS thing from THAT time. Like, I will actually cry while sliding slowly down against a wall.
I need vague spoilers.
So many wins in this one.
90% less Adam. And many of the times he shows up, he's getting his ass handed to him. Have I told y'all recently about the goodness of God?
I swear, I hate that guy so much, he has me revisiting religion.
Peter's all over the place in this one. Still a Dumb Fuck™ about Adam, but a dumb fuck that's questioning.
Daniel is......everything. Still a green flag, makes a few (welcome) mistakes but knows when to draw the line.
And the ending???? God. I used to pray for times like these.
I really hope book 3 is what I'm hoping it is and not a(nother) lesson in why I should quit while I'm ahead with HFN couples.
They're not a couple couple, but the way it ends in this is hopeful. And I will throw my phone at a wall if this results in some AIDS thing from THAT time. Like, I will actually cry while sliding slowly down against a wall.
I need vague spoilers.
November 17, 2016
-This book was provided by author via IndiGo Marketing and Design in exchange for an honest review-
-4.5 stars-
I don't even know where to start. Once again, this story tore my heart out, it made me rage, made me want to strangle Peter, and made me smile in the end with the hope that was the start of Peters HEA. Of course their are still two more books, so I'm expecting a hell of a lot more tears and angst first.
These books really do blow me away. They are everything I don't normally read, but am so glad I took myself out of my comfort zone because I love Peters story, and am so invested in seeing him get his happy ending.
I don't want to delve to much in to the story in case I give anything away. If your up to book two, you know that Adam has just gone off to Italy for the Summer, and Peter has decided to embrace his summer without him, trying to find who he is on his own. He certainly does that, from the beginning to the end of the book, he makes a lot of changes, and decisions, not all of them great. There are some great characters in this one. We still have all the old ones, but with Peter embracing his sexuality, we get to meet quite a few new ones. We also get a lot more of Daniel, who I absolutely adored, and his friends who accepted Peter in to their little group. Adam is still their, although physically not until the last quarter, so expect a lot more angst and drama there. Overall, it was great to see Peter branch out, slowly grow in to himself, and make new friends. Even his parents grew on me in the end. That's all I'm going to write, no story line giveaways because you really do need to just read it yourself. Highly recommend, and please Leta don't make me wait to long for book three. I'm dying here.........
-4.5 stars-
I don't even know where to start. Once again, this story tore my heart out, it made me rage, made me want to strangle Peter, and made me smile in the end with the hope that was the start of Peters HEA. Of course their are still two more books, so I'm expecting a hell of a lot more tears and angst first.
These books really do blow me away. They are everything I don't normally read, but am so glad I took myself out of my comfort zone because I love Peters story, and am so invested in seeing him get his happy ending.
I don't want to delve to much in to the story in case I give anything away. If your up to book two, you know that Adam has just gone off to Italy for the Summer, and Peter has decided to embrace his summer without him, trying to find who he is on his own. He certainly does that, from the beginning to the end of the book, he makes a lot of changes, and decisions, not all of them great. There are some great characters in this one. We still have all the old ones, but with Peter embracing his sexuality, we get to meet quite a few new ones. We also get a lot more of Daniel, who I absolutely adored, and his friends who accepted Peter in to their little group. Adam is still their, although physically not until the last quarter, so expect a lot more angst and drama there. Overall, it was great to see Peter branch out, slowly grow in to himself, and make new friends. Even his parents grew on me in the end. That's all I'm going to write, no story line giveaways because you really do need to just read it yourself. Highly recommend, and please Leta don't make me wait to long for book three. I'm dying here.........
October 15, 2021
4.25 stars ⭐️This book starts the right where the last book left off. With Adam and Peter’s complicated love, we are still on a roller coaster ride. It's really really intense. I don't know whether I want to smack or hug Peter for being so stupid because of his love for Adam.
Peter deserves someone who makes him his every first, not the side piece. He even knows that what he does to his friend, Leslie isn't the right thing to do.
I still don't like Adam. I hate him for making Peter’s life so miserable. It's hard to root for Adam when he is acting like a selfish bastard.
Then there is Daniel who is the best guy Peter has ever met. But Peter is still loyal to Adam, and don't want to hurt his feeling. Look at how stupid that sounds. 😭 He is conflicted with two choices, Adam and Daniel.
I'm so glad that Peter found new friends who don't mind his sexuality, and he can truly be himself with them. He doesn't deserve to be alone.
This story is a mess. I wish Peter could use his brain instead of his heart. It's so much hurt to see how he has been suffering from unrequited love.
Okay. Where the hell is the next two books? The author said the series has four books. But it has been almost five years since publishing the second book, and there is no book after that, and this book ended with a huge cliffhanger.
Peter deserves someone who makes him his every first, not the side piece. He even knows that what he does to his friend, Leslie isn't the right thing to do.
I still don't like Adam. I hate him for making Peter’s life so miserable. It's hard to root for Adam when he is acting like a selfish bastard.
Then there is Daniel who is the best guy Peter has ever met. But Peter is still loyal to Adam, and don't want to hurt his feeling. Look at how stupid that sounds. 😭 He is conflicted with two choices, Adam and Daniel.
I'm so glad that Peter found new friends who don't mind his sexuality, and he can truly be himself with them. He doesn't deserve to be alone.
This story is a mess. I wish Peter could use his brain instead of his heart. It's so much hurt to see how he has been suffering from unrequited love.
Okay. Where the hell is the next two books? The author said the series has four books. But it has been almost five years since publishing the second book, and there is no book after that, and this book ended with a huge cliffhanger.
August 26, 2022
Thank you Jan😘
What a book, this part just got a hold of me and kept twisting my guts around reading it. For me it was clearly watching how Peter’s character evolved. And seeing who people truly are, both with the M/C’s all the friend groups and all their families. I like Peter and his camera how all his photos captured his Perception of a moment to remember- how does he chose to see it
What a book, this part just got a hold of me and kept twisting my guts around reading it. For me it was clearly watching how Peter’s character evolved. And seeing who people truly are, both with the M/C’s all the friend groups and all their families. I like Peter and his camera how all his photos captured his Perception of a moment to remember- how does he chose to see it
June 18, 2023
It's so refreshing to read a story of such a flawed and real, yet likeable character. Peter and his decisions may be frustrating for the majority of this book (ughh, Adam, how I hated you and what you were doing to our sweet boy!), but they are also deeply human and understandable to anyone who has ever been nineteen and in love! On to book 3!
July 13, 2025
Second read through on audio: I forgot how much I absolutely loathe Adam and I spent most of the audio angry. But like in a good way? Because I know what happens in book 3 and just wanted to get there!! I highly recommend this trilogy!
Book 2 in the trilogy about Peter finding his way in life as a gay man was just as amazing as the first one! This is a coming-of-age, single POV romance and the whole book takes place in the time between Peter graduating from high school and starting college. Note this is 100% not a standalone. Book 1 Pictures Of You must be read before this book.
This book has its moments of frustration like book 1 did, however, there were so many moments I was super excited for and jumping with joy that they happened! Adam (Peter’s boyfriend) is out of the country for almost the entirety of this book so Peter takes the time during the summer to expand his friend group and live as an out gay man and it was amazing to see him make new friends and finally be “happy”.
As with the last book this book does not end on a HEA, however, it does end on a fantastic HFN though and I could not have been happier with the ending. The last few chapters made me so incredibly happy I was about to burst! I am so excited for book 3 which will be releasing very soon and I cannot wait to find out what Peter’s HEA will look like!
Book 2 in the trilogy about Peter finding his way in life as a gay man was just as amazing as the first one! This is a coming-of-age, single POV romance and the whole book takes place in the time between Peter graduating from high school and starting college. Note this is 100% not a standalone. Book 1 Pictures Of You must be read before this book.
This book has its moments of frustration like book 1 did, however, there were so many moments I was super excited for and jumping with joy that they happened! Adam (Peter’s boyfriend) is out of the country for almost the entirety of this book so Peter takes the time during the summer to expand his friend group and live as an out gay man and it was amazing to see him make new friends and finally be “happy”.
As with the last book this book does not end on a HEA, however, it does end on a fantastic HFN though and I could not have been happier with the ending. The last few chapters made me so incredibly happy I was about to burst! I am so excited for book 3 which will be releasing very soon and I cannot wait to find out what Peter’s HEA will look like!
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