Hidden Blessings: Midlife Crisis as a Spiritual Opportunity

by Jett Psaris

Many words have been written about this period of life sometimes called middle age. What makes Hidden Blessings different is its unique blend of psychological and spiritual guidance to help us respond fully to the transformative invitation of midlife. That invitation is to step away from taking life literally – and, perhaps, superficially – to discover a deep and profound underlying existence.

The transformation that is possible during midlife is more than just a continuation of the developmental arc of the first half of our lives; midlife offers the possibility of metamorphosis into an entirely new life with a vaster perspective than we have enjoyed until now. The midlife passage invites the death of who we have known ourselves to be and promises the birth of our authentic, soul-infused self, long suppressed under years of outward obligations. The more we view midlife as a spiritual rebirth rather than something to get over or simply endure, the less likely we are to settle for trying to repackage what we have lived during the first half of our adult lives – and the more likely we are to discover the full range of the blessings that awaits us if we surrender to the challenging process of unraveling and being transformed.

At midlife your story is only half told!

Genres: Spirituality, Nonfiction, Psychology

262 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 15, 2017

About the author

Jett Psaris, Ph.D., has inspired and supported others to embrace the full spectrum of their humanity through her writings, workshops, and private practice over the past 30 years.

She is a Nautilus Gold Award Finalist for her first book, Undefended Love, co-authored with Marlena Lyons; and author of Taking the Midlife Leap One Step at a Time, the first online course dedicated to guiding seekers through an emotionally rigorous midlife transformation into the second half of life.

Her newest book, HIDDEN BLESSINGS: MIDLIFE CRISIS AS A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING is the Gold Winner of the Nautilus Awards in the Category of Conscious Aging, and the Winner of both eh National Excellence Awards for Personal Growth Books and the Independent Press Award in the category of Spiritual Self Help. The book is also a Finalist in the Foreword Reviews Award for Body, Mind & Spirit and a Finalist in the Eric Hoffer daVinci Awards.

Her books have been referred to as “sacred texts for modern times.” For more information: www.jettpsaris.com.

Reviews

[Shane Hill, Ph.D. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best Midlife Text I Have Ever Seen:
I specialize in midlife issues in my private practice as a clinical psychologist. This book is truly unique and provides information that is shockingly helpful and effective. This is the best text I have ever seen about how to navigate the midlife journey and awaken to your deepest self. It gives practical guidance that will ultimately decrease your suffering and allow midlife to open you up to your authentic path. Dr. Psaris is a brilliant thinker and a compassionate guide to support you during one of the most difficult and transformative times in our lives. I highly recommend this book without reservation. I wish all people over the age of 45 could read this book. I think it will help to create more peaceful lives and less suffering in the world.

[Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jett Psaris writes from the exact convergence where the complexity of the human psyche meets the mystery of who we are beyond, within and throughout our personal story. In the middle of our lives, there is a “dark wood,” as Dante named it, where each of us must lose our way. The luckiest among us find a guide like Jett Psaris who can teach us to hear, in that thicket of loss and disillusionment, what she calls “the soul’s keynote.” With a mastery of psychological wisdom and a reverence for the “life pulse of the soul,” Psaris offers us not only an exquisite map, but a profound companionship along the way so that the small and large deaths that come with age are recognized as portals to awakening into an aliveness, freedom and connectedness we have never before imagined.

[Faith Freed · Rating 5 out of 5]

Blessings are hidden in this book. If you're somewhere in your 40s or older, feeling lost and thrown--you're not alone. Reassurance and support are to be found in these pages.

Our culture can spin an uninspiring slant on the second half of life. "Hidden Blessings" sets things straight by illuminating the rewards of growing older without denying the darkness.

Sure, us spiritual types know deep down that much is to be gained if the quality of our consciousness expands as we age. Yet, how do we get there from here? This book acts as a practical roadmap, provided by Jett Psaris, who really knows her stuff.

I suggest keeping a journal as you read so you can engage each Self-Inquiry as you go. New insights burst forth, even when the subject has been examined before. Trust the process and get into it.

The author likens the mid-life transformation to a caterpillar becoming a butterfly. This makes it feel OK to be in the disabling isolation of the chrysalis. And of course, it's itchy and awkward to sprout those metaphorical wings.

Now I have a trusted resource to recommend to my disillusioned mid-life clients. It's a touchstone for anyone navigating the tricky, mysterious and glorious trip from ego to soul.

[Gail Hernandez · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm too tired to read the rest

I was so depressed by the middle of the book that I couldn't finish it. I hope others have the strength to proceed.

[Tom Bennigson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jett Psaris is a wise teacher. This is a book to spend time with, and reread.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

So fantastic, and I believe it is the only book of it’s kind in that it approaches the issue from both a psychological and a spiritual perspective (but I do want to assure any potential readers that it is accessible to people of all faiths and spiritual persuasions, so don’t let that deter you). Psaris captures perfectly everything that I have been thinking and feeling recently, and I so appreciate that she clarifies that for some it’s not so much a midlife “crisis” as a midlife shift. I don’t feel like I’m in the midst of a crisis, but I do feel, as she describes, that the agenda of the first half of my life just doesn’t make sense anymore. And while I have no idea how any of this will shake out, I am witness to the unraveling of my ego, the stripping away of my conditioning, and the desire for greater meaning in life, and I trust that this shift will only result in greater happiness and purpose. Nevertheless, there are times that I feel mighty uncomfortable, and Psaris helped me to see that this discomfort is totally normal and just part of the process. In fact, if I didn’t feel uncomfortable from time to time, it would probably mean that I’m doing something wrong.

[tiffany.why · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a gem

I’m so grateful that I came across this book while I feel lost and aimless after my parents passed away in the last few years and now I’m at my age of 41. Jett has delivered very powerful messages about human psyche during the midlife transition and offered great directions to go through this stage of life. I truly believe this stage would become a great blessing if we handle this with conscious awareness. Thank you Jett Psaris for this great work!

[Norman Praught · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not sure why so many good ratings of this one. Just couldn't get through it! Too many things to follow and people should evolve as they age not tear themselves apart and start over. Glad it is helping lots of people just not for me.

[Alva · Rating 4 out of 5]

An excellent 'search inside yourself' book, to gain an understanding about the complexities of 'middle age.' How this understanding can turn a challenging time into a rewarding time. How the alignment of ego and soul creates an inner peace, no matter the obstacles. A book for the ages.

[Kalle Wescott · Rating 1 out of 5]

I can understand why this book is useful for some people. It was given to me as a gift. I read the whole book. For me, it was a 1-star and useless.

[Kristin Mjolsnes · Rating 5 out of 5]

deeply helpful

[luminele285 · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.73/5

[Tricia Parrish · Rating 5 out of 5]

Grappling with my life unraveling and in complete upheaval, desperation and despair set in. Feeling so alone in my experience of chaos and disruption, I didn't know where to turn. Hidden Blessings offered a way to be with my experience and journey with an entirely new perspective.
It allowed me to come out of isolation, fear, and a belief that something was wrong with me. I was invited to perceive my circumstance as an evolution that was actually bringing me closer and deeper to my true nature, what a gift. Jett Psaris is brilliant, she traverses the human psyche
and soul with such deep compassion and willingness to embrace our deepest humanity. The author offers clear, cohesive, sharp, compassionate, crystal containment of our universal human experience, struggle, beauty and refinement. I have learned to embrace this journey, the beauty is
walking in the experience. I'm grateful I have found a guide.

[Zenju Earthlyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

What happens when everything you know and do loses it's significance and you feel you're too "old" to start life all over again? You jump. Not overboard. You jump into a life that is more authentic and spacious. You leave behind everything thought to constitute your beingness. You trust the unraveling of your ego as a sacred time for a full initiation into being who you really are. Hidden Blessings by Jett Psaris, is a potent, clear, and precise spiritual guide in understanding, the cliffs of our lives, the fall, and then managing what "feels" to be broken inside us. In an extraordinary and innovative approach she gently turns our weary heads towards the sky. This book is a gift from a talented author, practitioner of truth, and advocate for faith. We only need to accept the gift and the path she unfolds.

Zenju Earthlyn Manuel, Ph.D., ordained Zen Buddhist priest and author of The Way of Tenderness: Awakening Through Race, Sexuality, and Gender

[John Amodeo · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the most gifted and soulful writers I know, Jett invites us to engage with our life challenges, sorrows, and joys in a way that irresistibly leads toward spiritual awakening and transformation. Accompanying us as a wise and loving friend, Jett’s stunningly clear writing, illuminating insights, and suggested inquiries gradually lead us to the joyful discovery of who we really are: radiant and loving beings. But we evolve toward this rapturous intimacy with life not through quick fixes or trying to transcend difficulties, but through the soulful work of embracing our humanity and engaging life as we find it. The gift of Hidden Blessings is to allow us to take one step at a time to lovingly enter our felt experience in a way that allows us to move from our fragmented identities to relishing the mystery and ecstasy of being alive.
--John Amodeo, PhD, author of Daand Love & Betrayal

[Donald Woolhouse · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is touching my personal journey in a way that I am able to put understanding to many of the missing links...or should I say overlooked. Waiting so many years for the freedom of mid-life and then fearing all that it brings up for me has been overwhelming...... I love that I now have a way to break down the journey and bring understanding and learning to my life to open the joy of the next piece....Thank you Jett for sharing you and putting this to paper for all of us.

[Tracy Blanchard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Review based on the audio book:

I've been recommended a lot of James Hollis in terms of reading about the midlife passage, and I just cannot get into him. So heady, so male. This book by Jett Psaris is the one I'm recommending to others, including women I see as a spiritual councilor. So much more helpful than Hollis, so much more accessible. If you're finding yourself in your 40s/50s and find that suddenly a lot of things are feeling pretty rough, even out of control, read this book. Very inspiring and helpful. I ended up buying the book and will start back through it and surely reference it over time.

Narrator not the greatest but certainly not bad.

[Aaron Perrin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading it for its topic and content, and new mental models. But, I really did not like the writing, particularly the structure and pacing.

[Michele Iacobucci · Rating 5 out of 5]

HIDDEN BLESSINGS is a treasure chest full of soulful wisdom and brilliant sharing from the heart with a precise understanding on how to navigate through mid-life. Jett Psaris guides us on our mid-life journey through the 12 stages she so brilliantly describes in this book. The depth and clarity of Jett’s teachings and stories so beautifully articulated allowed me to understand more fully the unanswered questions I have about mid-life. Navigating mid-life can be lonely, confusing, unsatisfying and emotionally draining. I understand more clearly now the purpose of my mid-life entry points and the spark that ignites my soul!

I truly appreciate the organization of this book as I have often revisited certain stages as they seemed appropriate for my sharing with others. This book is chock-full of thoughtfulness, reflection and inquiry. I especially liked the self-inquiry questions in each stage that allowed me to fully examine where I am in my life right now, how experiences from my past and family of origin have influenced who I am and what I can do to build upon or dismantle and move beyond those struggles in the rest of my life!

I knew whatever I was experiencing a few years ago was big, however, I had no idea until reading HIDDEN BLESSINGS that I experienced a “large” spirit door opening. I did not know how to describe it, understand it or articulate what it was. I felt destabilized. I felt stuck in that space between the 2 worlds when the spirit door opens not knowing what the future holds. However, I knew I was going in the direction of the energy my soul was taking me. It is all so clear to me now. It makes total sense.

This book is brilliant, comprehensive and a true gift that honors not only the psyche but the soul spirit too! Bravo to Jett Psaris for guiding us through to the rest of our lives! I have much gratitude for the lessons and I highly recommend anyone approaching or in mid-life to read this book! It just puts the whole mid-life journey in perspective.

Mahalo nui loa Jett for sharing your exquisite work with the world!
Michele Iacobucci

[Sigrid Herr · Rating 5 out of 5]

Books are my first stop in times of searching for answers and support when what I am used to doing doesn't work anymore. Midlife taught me that my old ways didn't do the trick anymore - more, it taught me that I needed so much more than new 'tricks', I needed insights and new perspectives.
Finding Jett's book "Hidden Blessings" provided me with a compass to navigate unknown, confusing and often scary new territories. The book helped me find means of exploring old belief systems, making sense of what really is, and mapping out solutions for what may lie ahead in the second half; it helps in finding closure for past experiences and creating space and openings for age appropriate new ones.
Change most often is a step by step and very gradual process, a widening of the aperture through increased awareness, and insights wrestled from what has hardened into uncomfortable stories from our past. Jett helps you chip away at mistaken and limiting notions. With a clear, original, and warm voice she provides sure and safe guidance for figuring out what it is that you are really looking for, your true and authentic self.
Read her book, many times.

[Ruel Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Many of us find that, somewhere in the middle stages of our lives, the ways of being that previously worked to create “success” in life seem to begin fraying at the edges, or the apparent success doesn’t have the meaning we thought it would, or life breaks down in some more dramatic way—like a divorce or health crisis. Jett Psaris has written a profound and gentle guidebook for that kind of experience, allowing her readers to see a much deeper meaning—not as life “falling apart,” but, instead, as the opportunity to allow a more authentic experience of life (and of our true selves) to emerge. Her writing is accessible, fresh, and practical, grounded in her own life stories and the stories of her own clients’ lives. Frequent suggestions for self-inquiry keep the focus personal, rather than theoretical. Ultimately, the book is about the deepest level of spiritual quest: the ever-expanding and ever-inspiring realization that our lives are about much more than “our” lives.