Desire: A Memoir

by Jonathan Dollimore, Joanna Picciotto (Series Editor), John Schad (Series Editor)

For more than thirty years Jonathan Dollimore has been one of contemporary culture's most influential critics of politics, literature, and sexuality. Part autobiography, part meditation, Desire: A Memoir reveals the existential sources of his inspiration. At once extreme and exemplary, it fearlessly explores the challenge of passion, of gay sex and suicidal depression. Desire: a Memoir is a raw, provocative and often moving account of the life within, beneath, and beyond critical commitment.

Genres: Memoir, Queer, Nonfiction, LGBT

192 pages, Hardcover

First published July 27, 2017

Reviews

[Abigail Ratcliff · Rating 5 out of 5]

For an account that seems to outline near to every sexual encounter in his life, he manages to trivialise not a single one. Each meeting highlights the importance of even the little things in life that we disregard as insubstantial, unimportant. But he also highlights how impossible it is to live in the moment, the fact that we have desire constantly creating tension between nostalgia for the past, hope for the future, uninhibited thoughts about the right way to 'spend' time, as if a commodity that never really belonged to us. This book has come at a good time for me, realising that trying to 'live life to the fullest' is futile as it will be what it will be and should be valued as such; that in itself is a small act of rebellion.

[Smita Mathur · Rating 5 out of 5]

Anyone who's even slightly familiar with Dollimore's writing knows the first reason for giving it 5/5. I fell in love with it at first read. His writing is always beautiful, impactful, funny, and for me, changes a lot about what I know about myself as a person. His writing also often articulates what I do not have the words to express. This book is everything above and more.

I honestly do not want to say any more about this book because I cannot do it justice. (I suppose I need a review of this book by Dollimore himself to say exactly what moves me about this book.) Just... read it, okay?

PS: You will cry a lot.

[Dora · Rating 1 out of 5]

Have not got very far yet, page 5, to be precise.
Dollimore starts his account with a scene from his teenage years: "I had gone looking for my mother and found her outside, sitting with Tony in the family car. As I approached, unbenownst to them, I saw that Tony was trying to have sex with her."
So this reader thinks: Poor Tony and his erectile dysfunction.
No, she doesn't. This reader thinks: Is this what down our way we call "sexual assault", or even "attempted rape"?
Yes, yes, it is, although Dollimore refuses to call it that. He, 15 at the time, was actually being masturbated by said Tony, round about the same time Tony was "trying to make out" with his mum. "It was clear my mother was resisting, and in a resigned and firm kind of way, which gave the strong impression that it wasn't the first time she'd had to do so."
Young Tony decides that he would stop having sex with Tony too. "On the face of it, a triumph for matriarchy."
Riiiiight.
And this from "a renowned cultural critic". How unutterably depressing to find prejudices confirmed that I didn't even have, beforehand.

[Chris Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

There's a deepness that travels through this book. It's so insightful, while still offering that slightly detached sense of self. Jonathan is a gifted writer, but more than that, he's a gifted storyteller. He explains his queer life in the late 80s and early 90s. His coming of age, if you will, thematically moulding the concept of desire. From the brutish deep yearnings to the utterly dark side; where desire brings with it the pain of wanting and not getting.

This memoir is predominately a queer story, but I think there's much to learn here for any persuasion. Especially regarding desire.

[A D · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sublime

I can't throw compliments at this magnificent piece of writing that could do other than fall short. I throw a single flower from the balcony, and as Werther sings, Oh Charlotte je vous aime et je vous admire'... The final paragraph - repeated from an encounter, is how I feel I am with it...

[Ryan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Usually avoid memoirs and autobiographies as find they often come across very 'pick me, pick me!', but this was an enthralling combination of funny, heartbreaking, and informative pieces. Just wanna give the guy a hug tbh and hear him tell the story about the dinner at the uptight Etonians' place again in person.

[Deb · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was beautiful

[Virgowriter (Brad Windhauser) · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. Parts I really enjoyed, the sections where he tells stories, but too much reads as general commentary. Felt awkward in a memoir. I wanted it all to be about his life/experiences.

[Alexander B · Rating 2 out of 5]

Boring, trivial, and too full of himself

[Oussema Elbez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I WANT TO HUG THIS BOOK.. FOREVER