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The Hospital: How I Survived the Secret Child Experiments at Aston Hall
Barbara O'Hare was admitted to Aston Hall psychiatric hospital when she was 12-years-old, where she was subjected to horrifying courses of 'treatment' from its head physician. Frequently injected with drugs, locked away and abused, Barbara has attempted to come to terms with her time at Aston Hall 46 years on. After creating the Facebook group Survivors of Aston Hall, victims have been brought together in their search for answers of how the abuse they suffered came to pass and was kept secret for so long. Their efforts have led to a major police investigation and a meeting at the Houses of Parliament to have their story heard.
This is her book, exposing the abuse she suffered at Aston Hall.
This is her book, exposing the abuse she suffered at Aston Hall.
320 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2017
1045 people are currently reading
7904 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 664 reviews
August 11, 2022
The saddest book I have ever read by the bravest and strongest woman there ever could have been. God bless you Barbara O’Hare
The Hospital by Barbara O’Hare is a very very well written NF book. It is also a gruesome, terrible story of horrid abuse on a little girl that never asked to be born and no one wanted. At the age of 11-12 Barbara O’Hare is placed in a mental hospital. In this hospital she went through terrible abuse by nurses and a doctor. Injections, drugged up, verbal abuse, threats of electric shock treatments and terrible sexual abuse. Her father just wanted her out of the way. Called her terrible names and threatened her to keep quiet. Always being called a liar and tinker. Sad book. That any child at any time in the world could go through this kind of abuse.
The Hospital by Barbara O’Hare is a very very well written NF book. It is also a gruesome, terrible story of horrid abuse on a little girl that never asked to be born and no one wanted. At the age of 11-12 Barbara O’Hare is placed in a mental hospital. In this hospital she went through terrible abuse by nurses and a doctor. Injections, drugged up, verbal abuse, threats of electric shock treatments and terrible sexual abuse. Her father just wanted her out of the way. Called her terrible names and threatened her to keep quiet. Always being called a liar and tinker. Sad book. That any child at any time in the world could go through this kind of abuse.
February 5, 2018
This has got be the hardest emotional book I've ever read,it starts with her early life wasn't good,ending up in the worst place.with sick doctors and nurses.the abuse was horrendous and I'm glad she was brave enough to say this did happened to her and many other children, and prove this did happen and should never happen again.I do recommend this book but be prepared it's differcult to read.
January 23, 2018
It is truly harrowing to think this actually happened and nobody ever blew the whistle on the horrendous abuse that took place within a system that should have protected and cared for these children.
I found it hard to read Barbara's gratitude to her Father also at the end as I felt he ultimately turned a blind eye to suit his lifestyle at the time.
A very brave action to tell the World this story and I hope at least the survivors of Aston Hall now can find peace and justice.
I found it hard to read Barbara's gratitude to her Father also at the end as I felt he ultimately turned a blind eye to suit his lifestyle at the time.
A very brave action to tell the World this story and I hope at least the survivors of Aston Hall now can find peace and justice.
June 15, 2017
Having found this on a book deal in asda I didn't think it would hold much. Especially when I admit that I wanted the books cheaper so just grabbed this on the way out not really even taking the time to look at it.
But I was blown away. Watching this girl go from the terrified child hiding under her bed away from the monster in the attic/wardrobe.
To one who was always made to feel the outsider.
To one again fighting for her life but from a new threat she didn't fully understand. How she and these other children survived is a testament to the resilience of children and the true strength of human nature and hope.
Being given treatment that by the sounds of it to this day is being denied and the victiums don't even fully understand or know what was given or done to them. Humans can be barbaric and this book shows both the horrors we can do, and on societies most vunerable. But also how strong we as a species can be to overcome things.
I pray all victiums of this get justice as some point. Sooner rather than later and that all those effected in anyway of these experiments find answers and peace. Hoping that it isn't done again. As it's already been done so easily under our own noses, with the childrens parents visiting them in this place without a single idea of what their children were going through.
Or we hope they had no idea.
But I was blown away. Watching this girl go from the terrified child hiding under her bed away from the monster in the attic/wardrobe.
To one who was always made to feel the outsider.
To one again fighting for her life but from a new threat she didn't fully understand. How she and these other children survived is a testament to the resilience of children and the true strength of human nature and hope.
Being given treatment that by the sounds of it to this day is being denied and the victiums don't even fully understand or know what was given or done to them. Humans can be barbaric and this book shows both the horrors we can do, and on societies most vunerable. But also how strong we as a species can be to overcome things.
I pray all victiums of this get justice as some point. Sooner rather than later and that all those effected in anyway of these experiments find answers and peace. Hoping that it isn't done again. As it's already been done so easily under our own noses, with the childrens parents visiting them in this place without a single idea of what their children were going through.
Or we hope they had no idea.
August 26, 2025
The book is wrote like a novel, however all the events within the book really happened to the Author. Her life story in fascinating, yet harrowing. From her early life of being passed from person to person, to her time spent in care, to her admittance to Aston Hall mental hospital, Barbara O'Hare tells an enthralling yet chilling tale of abuse, neglect and disdain.
One little girls struggle to find her mother, a maniac doctor who likes to "treat" young children, a group of wicked nuns and a father who just doesn't know how to cope.
An excellent read, and I truely hope the Aston Hall Survivors got/get justice for the torture they had to endure at the hands of pure evil.
One little girls struggle to find her mother, a maniac doctor who likes to "treat" young children, a group of wicked nuns and a father who just doesn't know how to cope.
An excellent read, and I truely hope the Aston Hall Survivors got/get justice for the torture they had to endure at the hands of pure evil.
August 25, 2021
The Hospital: How I Survived the Secret Child Experiments at Aston Hall by Barbara O'Hare was on the Sunday Times top ten bestseller list...Barbara O'Hare was just 12 when she was admitted to the psychiatric hospital, Aston Hall, in 1971. From a troubled home, she'd hoped she would find sanctuary there. But within hours, Barbara was tied down, drugged with sodium amytal - a truth-telling drug - and then abused by its head physician, Dr Kenneth Milner. 'Nobody knew what was going on behind those doors. We were human toys. Just a piece of meat for someone to play with.' The terrifying drug experimentation and relentless abuse that lasted throughout her stay damaged her for life. But somehow, Barbara clung on to her inner strength and eventually found herself leading a campaign to demand answers for potentially hundreds of victims. A shocking account of how vulnerable children were preyed upon by the doctor entrusted with their care, and why it must never happen again.
September 7, 2024
Very well written.
I couldn’t put this book down but it was very difficult to read.
This child had a life that was horrifying, and that was when she was living in the community and going to school. Why did nobody see that she was being abused?She was then put into a hospital that had free rein to do what they wanted and then to be told that there was no record of her stay, I can’t even imagine what was going through her head. The authorities should be making sure that she never wants for anything again.
I couldn’t put this book down but it was very difficult to read.
This child had a life that was horrifying, and that was when she was living in the community and going to school. Why did nobody see that she was being abused?She was then put into a hospital that had free rein to do what they wanted and then to be told that there was no record of her stay, I can’t even imagine what was going through her head. The authorities should be making sure that she never wants for anything again.
October 9, 2018
.‘A coldness flooded through my veins as I fell back onto the bed. I was trapped. I wanted to move but couldn’t. Instead, I remained there, watching and waiting, as still and as cold as a statue. The wheels of the trolley squeaked as the nurse headed towards the door. She turned to speak to someone standing by the doorway, just out of sight. “Alright, doctor, she’s all yours.”’
This is Barbara O’Hare’s story written with Veronica Clark. From the very beginning, at the age of 5 in the 1960’s, we hear of Barbara’s verbal, emotional and physical abuse from her step-family. I just do not know how some people can be so wicked to small children. There is something very wrong with a lot of people. The cruelty to a young child is horrifying. We have not even got to Aston Hall part of the story yet. It breaks my heart.
Aston Hall is in Aston-on-Trent (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aston_H...) which is near Derby in England. This area is called the East Midlands. I presume she lived near there but when I heard a brief interview with her on BBC News she had a Scouse accent which she may have picked up after being moved near there when she was twelve years old.
The story is compelling even though the material is dark. It feels like something from Victorian times rather than the 1960’s and 1970’s. Barbara goes over her childhood and how a sequence of events lands her in Aston hospital. ‘I’d been with the doctor less than ten minutes but he’d given me pills and I’d been admitted to hospital, even though there was absolutely nothing wrong with me’. She is 12 years old at this point with no family support or support of any kind. She is completely alone. Can you imagine? How scary is that?
You hear and read it time-and-time again where vulnerable children with no support are abused by adults and Barbara’s story is littered with abuse. The book follows Barbara’s childhood and not just her time at Aston Hall which lasted for 8 months.
Barbara also goes over how she got the truth revealed later in life and the process for getting survivors together. This is such a highly commendable act.
Contact Details:
‘If you were in Aston Hall, we are there for you – feel free to join us on Facebook. If you need help, please contact the Derbyshire NHS safeguarding team on 01332 623700. You can also contact Derbyshire police, asking for Operation Hydrant, on 101.
This is Barbara O’Hare’s story written with Veronica Clark. From the very beginning, at the age of 5 in the 1960’s, we hear of Barbara’s verbal, emotional and physical abuse from her step-family. I just do not know how some people can be so wicked to small children. There is something very wrong with a lot of people. The cruelty to a young child is horrifying. We have not even got to Aston Hall part of the story yet. It breaks my heart.
Aston Hall is in Aston-on-Trent (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aston_H...) which is near Derby in England. This area is called the East Midlands. I presume she lived near there but when I heard a brief interview with her on BBC News she had a Scouse accent which she may have picked up after being moved near there when she was twelve years old.
The story is compelling even though the material is dark. It feels like something from Victorian times rather than the 1960’s and 1970’s. Barbara goes over her childhood and how a sequence of events lands her in Aston hospital. ‘I’d been with the doctor less than ten minutes but he’d given me pills and I’d been admitted to hospital, even though there was absolutely nothing wrong with me’. She is 12 years old at this point with no family support or support of any kind. She is completely alone. Can you imagine? How scary is that?
You hear and read it time-and-time again where vulnerable children with no support are abused by adults and Barbara’s story is littered with abuse. The book follows Barbara’s childhood and not just her time at Aston Hall which lasted for 8 months.
Barbara also goes over how she got the truth revealed later in life and the process for getting survivors together. This is such a highly commendable act.
Contact Details:
‘If you were in Aston Hall, we are there for you – feel free to join us on Facebook. If you need help, please contact the Derbyshire NHS safeguarding team on 01332 623700. You can also contact Derbyshire police, asking for Operation Hydrant, on 101.
June 23, 2017
5 stars for this heartbreaking and tragic true story. I couldn't hold myself from crying while reading this. You were so strong, Barbara and still are.
Hopefully all of the truth will be unveiled soon! Take care!
Hopefully all of the truth will be unveiled soon! Take care!
April 2, 2017
Fantastic Read!!..My heart goes out to barbera and all the other survivors, fantastic book and couldn't put it down, I'd recommend this book 100%
November 16, 2020
I have wanted to read this for such a long time, and when I started reading it was impossible to stop. Barbara writes with such conviction, such emotion - what a horrific time she had. A mother who disappeared before she knew her, a father who abused her and put his various girlfriends first, and then a traumatic and horrendously upsetting time at Aston Hall where she was abused verbally, physically and sexually by the nurses and the leading man - Dr Milner, only for her father to disbelieve her when she finally got taken home. It sounds like the stuff of my worst nightmare. What a brave girl, and a strong woman to put this all down on paper.
May 23, 2018
The Power of Inner Strength
Think of a hospital. What might you expect?
A bustling hallway full of nurses and doctors and clean white curtains and patients being transported by busybodies who need to rush to get to where they need to be and an ocean of frantic and occupied voices wherever you go. Plain blue walls and vivid white lights. That “sanitary” smell that you can’t quite describe but will know when you’re in a hospital or doctor’s office.
This is the typical image picture of a hospital many would paint, and in many cases, it is on par with the truth.
I have been in a hospital very few times, and have only been to one once for my own injury. Nonetheless, I can imagine what a typical hospital experience may consist of. I got stitches once from a dog bite when I was four and for my only hospital experience, it wasn’t fun. Being wrapped up in a blanket while a doctor pokes around in your mouth is one of the strangest things a four year old could experience.
Everyone’s had a rough hospital experience, but some are unimaginable, and the glum but eventually happy story of Barbara O’Hare is one.
Barbara O’Hare’s experience was drastically different than a typical hospital patient. Barbara was a victim of a multi-month visit to an experimental hospital where she was drugged, abused and neglected. Barbara suffered through much more than this, enduring domestic violence and other trauma throughout her life, as well as enduring the lasting effects after. Through all of this, Barbara clung on to hope with one key trait-- inner strength.
Barbara shows inner strength throughout the book in every stage of her life, saving her from losing herself forever.
“I’d convinced myself that if I sat there long enough then maybe she’d decide to adopt me. But just as my hopes had started to rise, they quickly came crashing back down”(70).
At this point of the book, Barbara is still early in her life yet has endured numerous horrible circumstances. In her early life, Barbara was abused and neglected, and was raised by a negligent father and emotionally abusive stepmother. Barbara’s childhood was toxic and many readers of her memoir could not even get close to relating to what happened in her early childhood. Even after Barbara was fostered, she suffered physical abuse and starvation from a violent, alcoholic foster mother who was only fostering for the money it provided her.
Barbara then lived in an orphanage for young girls, where she frequently tried to escape to find a better life. In this part specifically, Barbara had escaped from the orphanage and was as desperate as to knock at strangers’ doors. A majority of the audience of Barbara’s memoir cannot connect to her experiences, but rather value and learn from how Barbara never gave up. The audience can place themselves behind the eyes and ears of Barbara and value how her inner strength allowed her to never lose hope--to never give up the faint but certain glimmer that things would get better.
“Everything will be okay as I’m not alone with the doctor. He’ll help me. The little mouse... He’ll go and fetch help” (218).
In this passage, Barbara is being drugged and allegedly abused in unspeakable ways by the hospital doctor. During her phony “treatment”, Barabara was subjected to ether and injections and recounts the experiences she had behind the doors of Aston Hall. Barbara not only found hope in her early life, but also that the hospital where she suffered through human experimentation and forms of abuse. While it seems silly, Barbara finds hope in the simplest things to help push through the trauma she suffers. Given the situation, this can take on a more serious tone. Barbara refuses to lose herself time and time again, and comforts herself using anything she can. Through her own inner strength, Barbara conveys not only a lesson, but a message and an experience to raise awareness for, and how she got to the point that she was able to share it.
“I had to fight it (cancer) so that I could live and expose the truth about what had happened to me all those years ago” (325).
In this final passage, Barbara realizes she needs to keep battling. Now in her middle ages, years past what happened while she was young, Barbara recognizes her self worth. Despite the long road of side effects--both physical and emotional-- that Barbara had dealt with, she preserves herself in order to show what happened to her. Barbara wishes to both bring a theme of the importance of inner strength, and to bring light to her situation and to share an experience. Barbara delivers a story of her hardships and past life to bring light to her injustices. Readers may not be able to directly relate to what happened, but the common and valued trait of resilience helps them sit in Barbara’s perspective.
The unbearable weight carried on Mrs. O’Hare’s shoulders from her life experience is one many--including myself--cannot come close to imagining. Barbara O’Hare’s life story was like a ball and chain that pulled her down and set back almost every aspect of her life, and her inner strength helped her push through and cut herself loose. But rather than directly relate to what happened to Barbara, the reader can place themself in her position and think “What would I do? Would I do the same as Barbara?”. I connect to Barbara because I can’t connect to her. I have never been abused and drugged, but if I were, I could think about what Barbara did. I can admire how she pushed through and never gave up hope, and always thought “I’ll get out of this. There’s a plan for me.” Barbara O’Hare’s memoir The Hospital taught me inner strength and persistence above simply being able to relate to what happened.
Think of a hospital. What might you expect?
A bustling hallway full of nurses and doctors and clean white curtains and patients being transported by busybodies who need to rush to get to where they need to be and an ocean of frantic and occupied voices wherever you go. Plain blue walls and vivid white lights. That “sanitary” smell that you can’t quite describe but will know when you’re in a hospital or doctor’s office.
This is the typical image picture of a hospital many would paint, and in many cases, it is on par with the truth.
I have been in a hospital very few times, and have only been to one once for my own injury. Nonetheless, I can imagine what a typical hospital experience may consist of. I got stitches once from a dog bite when I was four and for my only hospital experience, it wasn’t fun. Being wrapped up in a blanket while a doctor pokes around in your mouth is one of the strangest things a four year old could experience.
Everyone’s had a rough hospital experience, but some are unimaginable, and the glum but eventually happy story of Barbara O’Hare is one.
Barbara O’Hare’s experience was drastically different than a typical hospital patient. Barbara was a victim of a multi-month visit to an experimental hospital where she was drugged, abused and neglected. Barbara suffered through much more than this, enduring domestic violence and other trauma throughout her life, as well as enduring the lasting effects after. Through all of this, Barbara clung on to hope with one key trait-- inner strength.
Barbara shows inner strength throughout the book in every stage of her life, saving her from losing herself forever.
“I’d convinced myself that if I sat there long enough then maybe she’d decide to adopt me. But just as my hopes had started to rise, they quickly came crashing back down”(70).
At this point of the book, Barbara is still early in her life yet has endured numerous horrible circumstances. In her early life, Barbara was abused and neglected, and was raised by a negligent father and emotionally abusive stepmother. Barbara’s childhood was toxic and many readers of her memoir could not even get close to relating to what happened in her early childhood. Even after Barbara was fostered, she suffered physical abuse and starvation from a violent, alcoholic foster mother who was only fostering for the money it provided her.
Barbara then lived in an orphanage for young girls, where she frequently tried to escape to find a better life. In this part specifically, Barbara had escaped from the orphanage and was as desperate as to knock at strangers’ doors. A majority of the audience of Barbara’s memoir cannot connect to her experiences, but rather value and learn from how Barbara never gave up. The audience can place themselves behind the eyes and ears of Barbara and value how her inner strength allowed her to never lose hope--to never give up the faint but certain glimmer that things would get better.
“Everything will be okay as I’m not alone with the doctor. He’ll help me. The little mouse... He’ll go and fetch help” (218).
In this passage, Barbara is being drugged and allegedly abused in unspeakable ways by the hospital doctor. During her phony “treatment”, Barabara was subjected to ether and injections and recounts the experiences she had behind the doors of Aston Hall. Barbara not only found hope in her early life, but also that the hospital where she suffered through human experimentation and forms of abuse. While it seems silly, Barbara finds hope in the simplest things to help push through the trauma she suffers. Given the situation, this can take on a more serious tone. Barbara refuses to lose herself time and time again, and comforts herself using anything she can. Through her own inner strength, Barbara conveys not only a lesson, but a message and an experience to raise awareness for, and how she got to the point that she was able to share it.
“I had to fight it (cancer) so that I could live and expose the truth about what had happened to me all those years ago” (325).
In this final passage, Barbara realizes she needs to keep battling. Now in her middle ages, years past what happened while she was young, Barbara recognizes her self worth. Despite the long road of side effects--both physical and emotional-- that Barbara had dealt with, she preserves herself in order to show what happened to her. Barbara wishes to both bring a theme of the importance of inner strength, and to bring light to her situation and to share an experience. Barbara delivers a story of her hardships and past life to bring light to her injustices. Readers may not be able to directly relate to what happened, but the common and valued trait of resilience helps them sit in Barbara’s perspective.
The unbearable weight carried on Mrs. O’Hare’s shoulders from her life experience is one many--including myself--cannot come close to imagining. Barbara O’Hare’s life story was like a ball and chain that pulled her down and set back almost every aspect of her life, and her inner strength helped her push through and cut herself loose. But rather than directly relate to what happened to Barbara, the reader can place themself in her position and think “What would I do? Would I do the same as Barbara?”. I connect to Barbara because I can’t connect to her. I have never been abused and drugged, but if I were, I could think about what Barbara did. I can admire how she pushed through and never gave up hope, and always thought “I’ll get out of this. There’s a plan for me.” Barbara O’Hare’s memoir The Hospital taught me inner strength and persistence above simply being able to relate to what happened.
July 2, 2017
This is one of the quickest reads I've had in years. Very easy to read in terms of getting into the story fast, all be it a harrowing one! I've read books of abusive childhoods before and often they have been equally as harrowing as this was, but it has to be said this poor girl seemed to come into contact with many abusers including her own family way before the hospital featured in her life, which I thought was dreadful.
It really stuck a cord in me how she seemed to see her father as protector yet the man was also abusive verbally and diabolically to her many times and massively to blame for allowing other adults to abuse her dreadfully, yet she still loved and saw him in this positive manner. That was one of the most upsetting parts of her story I felt. I was angered that although the doctor died so could not be held properly accountable for his crimes, not one of those vile nurses has been so much as interviewed by police for their part in illegally holding the children and forcing them with drugs on many occasions. They are equally as monstrous as the doctor.
This story is not for the faint hearted and I have the utmost respect for Barbara having been able to compile a book from the situation. If I was her I think life would have beaten me and I'd be too bitter to engage with humans at all. (I'm partly like that due to my own life story which is a party in comparison to this awful situation)
It really stuck a cord in me how she seemed to see her father as protector yet the man was also abusive verbally and diabolically to her many times and massively to blame for allowing other adults to abuse her dreadfully, yet she still loved and saw him in this positive manner. That was one of the most upsetting parts of her story I felt. I was angered that although the doctor died so could not be held properly accountable for his crimes, not one of those vile nurses has been so much as interviewed by police for their part in illegally holding the children and forcing them with drugs on many occasions. They are equally as monstrous as the doctor.
This story is not for the faint hearted and I have the utmost respect for Barbara having been able to compile a book from the situation. If I was her I think life would have beaten me and I'd be too bitter to engage with humans at all. (I'm partly like that due to my own life story which is a party in comparison to this awful situation)
January 19, 2021
Wow. Never have I accidentally read a book from cover to cover in one sitting in the way that I did with this book.
I was interested when I began the book, but by 2 chapters in I was just gripped. Not entirely in an entertained way, but in a I-cant-stop-reading-this-even-though-its-disturbing-me way. I thought about it when I stopped reading to eat my dinner. I thought about it when I stopped reading to put my pyjamas on for bed, and I thought about it long after 3 am once id finally finished the last page, led there in the dark absolutely bitter and angry on Barbara and the other poor girl's behalfs who had to endure this torture.
This is the harrowing and disturbing memoir of Barbara O'Hare - a girl who grew up in the 60's under a broken family, and at the liberty of the cracked social services of the time. Pushed from pillar to post, from one bad situation to the next, never really being cared for properly and only ever wanting a family that loved her. She eventually ends up in Aston Hall - a Psychiatric Hospital, with a specialist ward for Children. Her mental health issue and the reason for being admitted? She was accused of biting her nails.
I knew before reading this book that children faced horrors inside Children's Homes, and Convent style reformatories - we've all heard of the Daily Mail stories that periodically spring a Children's Home into the limelight post Saville - but I must confess to never having REALLY considered just what those words meant until I read this first person account. Reading it through the eyes of a lost and terrified 11 year old just brings those stories to life; and truly made me realise just what these people were saying when they spoke up about the horrors they faced in these institutions with noone to look out for them.
The descriptions of her time inside Aston Hall were descriptive without being overly descriptive - told from the eyes of an 11 year old, we go through all the confusion, sadness, terror and heartbreak in real time with Barbara as she recounts the panic of seeing the Doctor arrive and the nightly chore of his singling a girl out. We go through the disgust and confusion of Barbara waking up 48 hours later drugged, dazed and confused as to why she's bleeding in places she is not used to bleeding from. We face the frustration with her as she tries to convince her father and social worker about what is happening to her - only to be disbelieved and told to stop making up lies.
There were a couple of discrepancies in the writing - Sister Jenny for example retires from the convent on one page and is missing due to a heart attack on the next - but I think this makes the tale more authentic because the author is not writing this to become an established author here. She is recounting HER tale. I am glad I read this, even though I have been left puzzled and distracted all day by the horrors I stayed up all night reading. I am so glad Barbara and others are taking a stand now against this - standing up and refusing to keep quiet about what happened to them. I hope against hope that all girls and boys who went through this see justice served and that never again are such disgusting horrors allowed to happen to defenceless people again.
I was interested when I began the book, but by 2 chapters in I was just gripped. Not entirely in an entertained way, but in a I-cant-stop-reading-this-even-though-its-disturbing-me way. I thought about it when I stopped reading to eat my dinner. I thought about it when I stopped reading to put my pyjamas on for bed, and I thought about it long after 3 am once id finally finished the last page, led there in the dark absolutely bitter and angry on Barbara and the other poor girl's behalfs who had to endure this torture.
This is the harrowing and disturbing memoir of Barbara O'Hare - a girl who grew up in the 60's under a broken family, and at the liberty of the cracked social services of the time. Pushed from pillar to post, from one bad situation to the next, never really being cared for properly and only ever wanting a family that loved her. She eventually ends up in Aston Hall - a Psychiatric Hospital, with a specialist ward for Children. Her mental health issue and the reason for being admitted? She was accused of biting her nails.
I knew before reading this book that children faced horrors inside Children's Homes, and Convent style reformatories - we've all heard of the Daily Mail stories that periodically spring a Children's Home into the limelight post Saville - but I must confess to never having REALLY considered just what those words meant until I read this first person account. Reading it through the eyes of a lost and terrified 11 year old just brings those stories to life; and truly made me realise just what these people were saying when they spoke up about the horrors they faced in these institutions with noone to look out for them.
The descriptions of her time inside Aston Hall were descriptive without being overly descriptive - told from the eyes of an 11 year old, we go through all the confusion, sadness, terror and heartbreak in real time with Barbara as she recounts the panic of seeing the Doctor arrive and the nightly chore of his singling a girl out. We go through the disgust and confusion of Barbara waking up 48 hours later drugged, dazed and confused as to why she's bleeding in places she is not used to bleeding from. We face the frustration with her as she tries to convince her father and social worker about what is happening to her - only to be disbelieved and told to stop making up lies.
There were a couple of discrepancies in the writing - Sister Jenny for example retires from the convent on one page and is missing due to a heart attack on the next - but I think this makes the tale more authentic because the author is not writing this to become an established author here. She is recounting HER tale. I am glad I read this, even though I have been left puzzled and distracted all day by the horrors I stayed up all night reading. I am so glad Barbara and others are taking a stand now against this - standing up and refusing to keep quiet about what happened to them. I hope against hope that all girls and boys who went through this see justice served and that never again are such disgusting horrors allowed to happen to defenceless people again.
June 1, 2018
This is an autobiographical book about the abuse Barbara was exposed to as a child. Her mother, a gypsy, abandoned her at birth and she lived with her father, and was abused by his subsequent partners.
Barbara was sent to a children’s home, then a remand home called The Cedars and later to a psychiatric hospital called Aston Hall under the auspices of the ominous Dr. Milner.
Daily she is given tablets that drug and paralyze her, is tied up and exposed to strange, terrible “treatments” and subsequently while unconscious raped by Dr. Milner. She does not realize this at first, but subsequent to the treatments she is sore “down below”, and bleeding.
None of the girls in the institution are mentally ill, though there is one grownup woman, Jane, who always dances around and sings the same song, who is; she is not subjected to Dr. Milner’s treatments.
The nurses threaten to give Barbara electric shock therapy, which terrifies her, for good reason. Some are permanently harmed by this treatment and never speak again.
Barbara makes a good friend, Christine.
Eventually, Barbara’s father gets her out of Aston Hall, though he took his time and I don’t understand how Barbara seems to idealize him, since he practically never visited her, was abusive to her, and didn’t listen to her accounts of the abuse at first.
I give the book five stars for Barbara’s courage in writing it, getting in contact with other survivors, and bringing the whole matter to light.
Unfortunately, Dr. Milner is now long dead so cannot be brought to justice.
This is by no means a pleasant read, but it is important that the matter has been revealed. I believe abuse has occurred and is still occurring in other institutions, and the exposure of the horrors of Aston Hall can help bring awareness of the existence of other such institutions where abuse still occurs.
Barbara was sent to a children’s home, then a remand home called The Cedars and later to a psychiatric hospital called Aston Hall under the auspices of the ominous Dr. Milner.
Daily she is given tablets that drug and paralyze her, is tied up and exposed to strange, terrible “treatments” and subsequently while unconscious raped by Dr. Milner. She does not realize this at first, but subsequent to the treatments she is sore “down below”, and bleeding.
None of the girls in the institution are mentally ill, though there is one grownup woman, Jane, who always dances around and sings the same song, who is; she is not subjected to Dr. Milner’s treatments.
The nurses threaten to give Barbara electric shock therapy, which terrifies her, for good reason. Some are permanently harmed by this treatment and never speak again.
Barbara makes a good friend, Christine.
Eventually, Barbara’s father gets her out of Aston Hall, though he took his time and I don’t understand how Barbara seems to idealize him, since he practically never visited her, was abusive to her, and didn’t listen to her accounts of the abuse at first.
I give the book five stars for Barbara’s courage in writing it, getting in contact with other survivors, and bringing the whole matter to light.
Unfortunately, Dr. Milner is now long dead so cannot be brought to justice.
This is by no means a pleasant read, but it is important that the matter has been revealed. I believe abuse has occurred and is still occurring in other institutions, and the exposure of the horrors of Aston Hall can help bring awareness of the existence of other such institutions where abuse still occurs.
May 24, 2023
The most horrific book I've ever read. Only horrific because it was true. I've read it in 3 days. I couldn't put it down because I needed a happy ending so badly. Although far from it because the case of Aston Hall is all but finished. There are so many things to talk about from this, all the people that share part of the blame, the nurses, the social workers, the authorities (NHS, home office or whoever was in charge), the parents... keeping those kids safe was everybody's job.
It all went on for years under their noses and nothing will take away the suffering they went through. I just hope it serves as a reminder to listen to children, to take them seriously because it's not their "wild imagination".
(TW for this book are: child abuse (physical and verbal), suicidal thoughts and suicide attempt)
It all went on for years under their noses and nothing will take away the suffering they went through. I just hope it serves as a reminder to listen to children, to take them seriously because it's not their "wild imagination".
(TW for this book are: child abuse (physical and verbal), suicidal thoughts and suicide attempt)
March 2, 2020
There is so much potential for this book because of the horrific story behind it. However, the memoir as a piece of writing falls short. It seems self-published, what with the myriad of grammatical errors. It was also very bare-bones, with several descriptive phrases repeated and not much else cushioning the story. The whole thing was rather boring, even though when I took a step back from the story, I felt properly horrified.
Everything is too blunt and too much of the story is glossed over. I understand that this can't be a seven hundred page novel containing every detail of the author's trauma, but the abuse itself - the central point of the story - feels rather like another plot point on the way to the final destination. If the storytelling was stronger, then this book would be more compelling.
The sudden shift at the end in attitude towards the father character was strange as well. The father is established as being a horrible man for the whole story but suddenly, at the end, he is painted as a good man. The author claimed that he was responsible for getting her out of the hospital - but it wasn't him, it was his girlfriend. Not to mention that neither of them provided emotional support for the author or tried to help the other children.
I sincerely hope that the author and everyone who suffered alongside her gets justice for what happened to them. Their trauma was terrible. This story is truly indicative of how often troubled children are pushed to the sidelines and forgotten.
Everything is too blunt and too much of the story is glossed over. I understand that this can't be a seven hundred page novel containing every detail of the author's trauma, but the abuse itself - the central point of the story - feels rather like another plot point on the way to the final destination. If the storytelling was stronger, then this book would be more compelling.
The sudden shift at the end in attitude towards the father character was strange as well. The father is established as being a horrible man for the whole story but suddenly, at the end, he is painted as a good man. The author claimed that he was responsible for getting her out of the hospital - but it wasn't him, it was his girlfriend. Not to mention that neither of them provided emotional support for the author or tried to help the other children.
I sincerely hope that the author and everyone who suffered alongside her gets justice for what happened to them. Their trauma was terrible. This story is truly indicative of how often troubled children are pushed to the sidelines and forgotten.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 7, 2019
This book is certainly not a 'feel good' book, its one of the most harrowing things I have ever read, to think this sort of thing went on only 30 or so years ago is almost unimaginable.
There were two reasons I decided to pick up this book, firstly I had seen a favourable review from a friend of mine who i follow on here and secondly, I have visited Aston Hall as part of my other love, Urban Exploration (http://urbandegeneration.com/aston-ha...) and it was interesting to add some history to my visit.
Despite the fact this book was a very sad story, it was somewhat of a page turner, with each chapter I read, Barbara's life seemed to get worse and worse and I was wondering when it would get better and how much worse life could get.
It was a bit of a mixed ending really, although things were resolved in one way, there is still a lot of outstanding work to be done for Barbara and others like her to get final closure (if this is even possible).
Hopefully this book will be updated at some point with a happy ending for all.
There were two reasons I decided to pick up this book, firstly I had seen a favourable review from a friend of mine who i follow on here and secondly, I have visited Aston Hall as part of my other love, Urban Exploration (http://urbandegeneration.com/aston-ha...) and it was interesting to add some history to my visit.
Despite the fact this book was a very sad story, it was somewhat of a page turner, with each chapter I read, Barbara's life seemed to get worse and worse and I was wondering when it would get better and how much worse life could get.
It was a bit of a mixed ending really, although things were resolved in one way, there is still a lot of outstanding work to be done for Barbara and others like her to get final closure (if this is even possible).
Hopefully this book will be updated at some point with a happy ending for all.
February 19, 2018
Decently written and an important account, but the title is misleading. If you are researching illegal medical experiments, for example, this book doesn’t actually contain any - it’s simply child abuse and assault. Half the book deals with the author’s early childhood or subsequent boarding school experiences, which is not relevant to “The Hospital.” Still worth a read if you are interested in patients’ rights or child welfare.
June 8, 2018
A chilling reminder of why public services such as social services, police, and healthcare services, need independent reviewing and monitoring mechanisms to keep those in power from exploiting the vulnerable people under their care.
This type of story happens in all countries. It reminds me of the what local first nations people here have talked about happening at the "indian hospitals" and residential schools.
This type of story happens in all countries. It reminds me of the what local first nations people here have talked about happening at the "indian hospitals" and residential schools.
June 10, 2017
Shocking story. A life no child should ever have to live through and no adults in their right mind should cause. I read it in one go, feeling out of reality... unbelievable that this went on unknown to the outside world. Respect for Barbara and all the other childen for surviving Ashton Hall. I hope and pray that justice is served.
February 24, 2017
Scary how these things happened but went unnoticed
April 3, 2017
Barbara O'Hare. What an amazingly strong woman, an inspiration.
April 10, 2017
A harrowing book. Unputdownable xx a very brave lady xx
January 21, 2021
That these unimaginable things could happen, is a testament of the sad state of our society. We are horrible in that we could possibly allow such things to take place.
November 5, 2024
The Hospital (Trapped, Drugged & Abused) by Barbara O’Hare
Audio Version free with Audible
Information/Memoir: B
Narration: A-
Best Aspect: Hearing a strong woman today after enduring abuse as a child is empowering.
Worst Aspect: Hard to handle what happened.
Recommend: Yes.
Audio Version free with Audible
Information/Memoir: B
Narration: A-
Best Aspect: Hearing a strong woman today after enduring abuse as a child is empowering.
Worst Aspect: Hard to handle what happened.
Recommend: Yes.
April 10, 2025
A book about the injustices of the system the horrors of a so called hospital and the overcoming of it all will make you want to scream out loud and say who is that much of a monster to do that to a little girl?
May 29, 2023
Very heavy read.
May 2, 2024
Horrific story but based on real life trauma. What a strong lady to be able to write a book like this.
May 13, 2024
Man's inhumanity to man never ceases to amaze me!!
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