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Whatever Makes You Happy

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What does it take to be happy? How happy is happy enough? And what does “happy” mean, anyway? So asks Sally Farber–wife, mother, daughter, friend, working woman, and lover–in this wise and funny novel about a woman’s search for happiness in some of the right, and a few of the wrong, places.

Summer in the city looms long for Sally Farber when she sends her two daughters off to camp for the first time. Suddenly freed of her usual patterns in a city that becomes a grown-up’s playground,, she embarks on a journey unlike any she’s ever had–filled with guilty pleasures and guilty pains.

Caught between the past (cleaning out her childhood apartment as her demanding mother offers edicts from South Carolina) and the future (facing her first semi-empty nest), Sally finds herself unexpectedly involved with a powerful, unpredictable man.

And as she researches a book whose very topic is happiness, she must weigh the relative merits of prescriptions for its attainment offered by Aristotle and the Dalai Lama, Freud and Charles Schulz, scented candles and Zoloft, her mother and her best friend. The answer comes, in the end, from a surprising discovery, in this rich and original novel about how we can find, and ultimately embrace, both happiness and love.

249 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

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297 people want to read

About the author

Lisa Grunwald

19 books457 followers
Lisa Grunwald is the author of the novels The Evolution of Annabel Craig, Time After Time, The Irresistible Henry House, Whatever Makes You Happy, New Year's Eve, The Theory of Everything, and Summer. Along with her husband, former Reuters editor-in-chief Stephen J. Adler, she edited the bestselling anthologies The Marriage Book, Women's Letters and Letters of the Century. Grunwald is an occasional essayist and runs a side hustle on Etsy called ProcrastinationArts, where she sells other things she makes with pencils and paper. She lives in New York City.
Photo courtesy of author website.

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5 stars
21 (5%)
4 stars
64 (16%)
3 stars
159 (41%)
2 stars
104 (27%)
1 star
32 (8%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
Profile Image for Jenny.
1,222 reviews102 followers
January 12, 2016
*****2.5*****
I read it quickly. It's mildly entertaining. What I liked most about it was the information about happiness. I wish Grunwald had written The History of Happiness, the book her protagonist, Sally, is writing, instead of this novel. If she had, it would have been a four-star book. As a novel, though, it has no depth. Sally is unhappy, she doesn't have much of a reason to be, and there isn't really a conflict. The characters are okay, but there really isn't a plot. If it weren't for the facts and quotes about happiness, this would have been a two-star book. Two and a half is a fair rating for how I felt after finishing it. It really didn't make me happy...
473 reviews25 followers
June 30, 2010
The premise was interesting: an author writes about the history of happiness while struggling to find it herself. However, the main character, Sally, just didn't have a reason to be unhappy. Sally has a wonderful husband, she adores her children and being a mother, she has a best friend and a successful career. So, why would she be unhappy? Okay, some women just are. But when Sally decides to have an affair with a conceited artist that she knows is using her, I was confused. Sally's reason for the affair? Her "empty-nest". Um, right. She sent her 9 and 10 year old daughters off to summer camp for the whole summer. Did someone force her to? No. So, help me out here. Her existential crisis that could cost her her marriage was she missed the children she sent away? I didn't see a reason to finish this book, as I didn't care what happened to Sally and her non-problems.
85 reviews3 followers
July 10, 2008
This is a book with a predictable plot line about a writer trying to figure life out. Not exactly a never-been-done-before sort of thing, but what makes it worse than average is that it's boring and not well-written. Sally is writing a book about happiness and ironically, the passages from her book are really... boring. No wonder she's feeling like it's not taking off. I agree with other reviewers, I think it's a completely dumb idea that a new man (who isn't even presented in a very appealing way) solves the happiness crisis that Sally seems to be going through. As far as character development, I felt like I was sympathetic toward no one, except maybe her husband since he was being duped, because all the characters were two dimentional. Don't waste your time, read Eat Pray Love instead.
Profile Image for Carley.
154 reviews
August 15, 2007
A book about a woman who has the love of her life, two healthy children and has a successful writing career and is unhappy and spends the most of book cheating on her husband. Why write a book about that? And why publish it?
Profile Image for Kelly Doherty.
31 reviews
July 7, 2011
I wanted to like this book. It was predictable in a comfortable way. But ultimately the protagonist is the kind of woman I do not enjoy. And not because of her actions. She was just too self important.
Profile Image for Katherine.
487 reviews11 followers
June 1, 2016
Is it possible to have a chick lit book without someone having an affair? I was drawn to this because of the mention of a character who is an author working on research for a book about happiness. Sadly, there was far less time spent in talking about any of that than there was in the main character deciding--despite a husband so flawless and devoted as to be completely unbelievable--that having an affair will make her happy. Uh, really?

There just wasn't enough of anything to make this book an enjoyable read for me. There were some stellar descriptions, some clever bon mots, but there was nothing to make this plotline sing. The best friend was obnoxious and clueless. The main character expressed little reasoning behind any of her choices. The husband was a sketchily-drawn "great guy", with little to actually describe who he was. The children were placeholders, there to provide some reason for the main character to mull about her emotions. There was no character arc, no change, no sudden coming to oneself: just a slow plod through terrible life choices that are somehow justified by the author realizing she was already happy, anyway.

Not recommended.
Profile Image for Karen Bergreen.
Author 4 books170 followers
November 11, 2011
I think I would have given this more stars had I not loved Henry House so much and wanted to repeat the experience.

this would actually be a great book group discussion because happiness is the main themer here and what defines it is certainly an interesting question. the story is less interesting than her writing, which is eloquent.
865 reviews173 followers
May 18, 2010
I thought Irresistible Henry House was so good that I went and took out three of Grunwald's other books AND THEY ARE ALL LOUSY.
4 reviews
October 31, 2025
Marked for spoilers just in case.

After reading some negative reviews, I can understand why some people did not enjoy this book. Not much of a plot, simple characters, no reason for the main character to be unhappy.

I do not think the goal of this book was to focus on rudimentary literary components such as these, though. I think this book is a little more psychological. I think the main character was much too in her own head, and was clearly thinking too hard about her life and her book writing goals. I think if anybody set out to write a book on what happiness was, while doing vast research as to what a plethora of other people across the ages equates “happiness” to be, they too would start to question their own happiness, raga endless of if they really were happy. It is the fault of no one, only the human mind. The world can become opaque if we overanalyze everything.

I honestly enjoyed this book, but thought the ending was not very fulfilling. I predicted her husband would catch her cheating, and being the good guy he is, be totally fine with it, saying something along the lines of “whatever makes you happy” (the books title).

I think this uncertainty in life is immensely relatable, and is something that a lot of people experience at some point in their lives. Some people do immoral things, even though they are good people. The world is hard to navigate sometimes. And to the people who say that Sally has no reason to be unhappy, it’s worth mentioning that every single person has a different idea of what happiness is. Some people may not be happy living the life she does, other people would be ecstatic. Happiness is subjective, and the quotes in this book do a great job at pointing this out.

I honestly enjoyed this book, and hope others do as well. I would recommend this book to those in search of their own happiness.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Julie Akeman.
1,106 reviews21 followers
July 28, 2018
I've noticed a lot of women's fiction has the theme of happiness in it, and I'd say it's getting cliché but still we are seeking our own happiness all the time. In this book, Sally Farber goes on her search for it because she is writing a book on it, or at least trying to. The second chapter starts with a rather startling awareness of her waking up and realizing she doesn't remember the size and shape of other men's penis and I am like well her age and I'm thinking, do a lot of women go through this thinking? It made me laugh, trust me, get through that part and you will definitely feel for her situation.


This is a book for women going through that major life change when they realize how much they lose in giving their all to their families and having to come to grips with a lot of issues. What I really love is a beautiful symbol of happiness that is featured, blue sea glass. I won't say much on that now. Read it and discover for yourself, and why I want blue sea glass now.
Profile Image for (Lonestarlibrarian) Keddy Ann Outlaw.
667 reviews22 followers
October 20, 2021
I know a lot of reviewers were down on this fictional woman’s midlife crisis. No spoilers here, so I am not going to give details. For me, her ennui rang true. The fact that it is a novel about a woman writing a book intrigued me. And the subject of her book is happiness, so the novel is littered with happiness quotes and findings. Ultimately, it boiled down to this: that what makes us happy is not doing or being the best, but doing BETTER. In my art practice, in gardening, in relationships and life itself, yes — working at doing whatever it is better is truly my path, and this book was a confirmation of that. I want to see progress, I want to learn more, I want things to be better, but I avoid the concept of being the best since that is way too much pressure on myself. Thus, doing better at anything (!) defines happiness. If anything I’ve said here intrigues you, try it — you might like it!
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
348 reviews7 followers
November 27, 2023
There was no depth to the characters at all; to the point that it didn't even make sense what attracted the main character to the artist that she had an affair with, or what attracted the artist to the main character or why the affair continued so long or why it started in the first place. You end up not caring about any of the characters or even how it ends.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Lise M Dickson.
59 reviews
October 14, 2019
It contained the reasoning of a faithful spouse as one who loves herself/himself too much to do something that was so unlovable. Fabulous!
Profile Image for Tennessee O'Donnell.
26 reviews43 followers
August 19, 2009
It took me a little bit to get into this book,
so a bit slow to start off. I did find the bits about the character "Author Sally Farber" researching and writing facts about happiness just a tad repetitive. Although I enjoyed this book the more I read along. I think it is actually quite a deep and reflective book about being happy within yourself, accepting our paths or understanding what is involved to change it. Sometimes you do have to make decisions for yourself without taking in how it will effect other people that you love. Especially with regards to women and mothers..society in general can frown upon women that realise they want more than "contented life =loving husband and children. Sometimes it takes courage to explore your own path, putting your needs first. We are woman made up of a myriad sum of parts that form our characters.
No one was harmed emotionally, thank goodness in the story. It was more about Sally's journey and restless spirit as she begin to explore the meaning of happiness in her own life, this was the subject given for her book and the research for her book began to open a "Pandora's box" so to speak but she made the decision that was right for her in the end.

I must say I did have a very real laugh out loud moment reading chapter 22, and could identify with it and the friendship..if you have ever been involved in an... what could potentially be an extremely awkward situation for all involved.. bad to worse! I also enjoyed the relationship Sally had with her father. It was quite moving and with the special discovery Sally makes that comes at the end of the story.
Profile Image for Meredith Hines-Dochterman.
401 reviews8 followers
November 24, 2015
I checked this book out on a whim because I'll be 40 soon and sometimes I wonder if I'm going through a midlife crisis (but I think it's more that I'm bored or not wanting to do the things I need to do).

The main character in the book is also about my age and going through a "Is this really my life?" moment. She's struggling with her latest book assignment, her kids are off to camp for the summer so she feels guilty about that, she and her husband are just kind of there, and her mom expects her to clean out their old apartment so she can sell it. I admit, her to do list is pretty overwhelming, but where as I tend to get really OCD about things when life seems to be too much, she avoids everything, which makes the situation(s) even worse.

I had a hard time connecting to Sally and disagreed with the decisions she made. Still, I found the information about happiness she spouted every so often while researching the book she's not writing interesting. I closed this book thinking, "Hey. My life is pretty darn good." That might not have been the author's intent, but I'll take it!
Profile Image for Kendra.
1,101 reviews
May 21, 2008
While writing a book about happiness, author Sally Farber is experiencing a happiness crisis in her own life. A little too predictably, she has to have an affair to figure out what she wants. The book is occasionally interesting and thought-provoking, but having read enough journal articles to last me a lifetime, I find it annoying to have my fiction peppered with faux-academic snippets about philosophy and research. My eyes glazed over for pages at a time.

I did, however, like this part a lot:

"Reflexively, indulgently, Michael smiles. 'I'm sure it's not crap,' he says. 'I'm sure it's just fine.'

This is a textbook example of what I have come to think of as the reflex of marriage: the instinct to say the supportive thing, no matter what the reality. I fight the same impulse every morning, when I force myself to look before I assure Michael that his tie goes with his shirt."
Profile Image for Robin.
719 reviews4 followers
March 2, 2014
I don't know what to say. I think this ladie's morals stunk and her "its okayness" to do the things she did were rotten.

An author is trying to write a book on the History of Happiness. Looking at her life you'd think she would be that...happy. She married the love of her life, has 2 beautiful girls whom she adores but feels like maybe in writing this book and facing midlife crisis she's not sure she really knows what happiness is. She has an affair with an artist and I was left to believe she never tells her husband (who loves her dearly). She eventually discovers that she has it pretty good in life but always wonders if there's something better. Personally I think she's an idiot.

The only reason I gave this book 3 stars is because there was a couple of things that made me ponder my own life and what happiness is to me.
304 reviews1 follower
August 19, 2008
I got FURIOUS with the character in this book. She used age old excuses about "deserving" something and nearly ruins many lives. I don't think I have felt this angry at a character in a long time.

I think the author touches on some good themes in the perspective of happiness, but she ended the book a bit abruptly. I don't think you can end a book with someone just walking away from a bad decision and life just returns to the same it was before for all involved.
Profile Image for Amy.
102 reviews1 follower
June 8, 2011
The main character in this book drove me crazy. She could see all the good things in her life, but still chose to turn away from them, and risked losing everything good in her life. The other thing that drove me crazy is she had plenty of opportunites where she felt like she should and yet she turned her back on it. I hated that she was able to face the woman who's husband she was having an affair with and felt no guilt. That drove me crazy.
Profile Image for Amy B .
12 reviews
February 2, 2008
The book wouldn't have been too bad except I was a little unhappy about her affair!! Like women who have been married 'x' amount of years need to have an affair to find happiness. Weird. Especially when the 'other man' seemed to me like a slug more than anything. I didn't buy it....the idea that is. Have the book and if you want to borrow it, let me know!!!
21 reviews
November 3, 2009
This book was about a woman trying to find her identity, by the end I'm not sure if she found it. But she had an affair in the process while decieving her wonderful, understanding husband. It just didn't sit right with me, but still a page turner, I kept waiting for it to all blow up in her face.
Profile Image for Janna.
15 reviews2 followers
Want to read
February 7, 2010
I got this out of the library just a few days ago and flew through it! It's an interesting combination of a novel with some research peppered through it. I learned - loosely - about some interesting research being done on happiness. It's a bit strange because she fictionalizes some of the research, but it is largely based on fact. It's a sweet and engaging story.
Profile Image for Brenda.
800 reviews
April 21, 2016
Although this book did not get many 5 star reviews, this book really spoke to me. I think most women at some point in their lives stop to wonder if their life path has led them to happiness. And what is happiness? The author deals with many definitions of happiness and helps readers to think about the many facets of happiness. Loved the book and read it in one day.
Profile Image for Sandy.
673 reviews29 followers
June 16, 2008
This is a cute, quick read about 3 British moms who decide to interfere in the lives of their 3 bachelor sons by going to live with them unannounced for one week. I enjoyed it and it waas good airplane reading.
78 reviews2 followers
February 6, 2010
Sally is trying to write a book that defines happiness. In addition to very interesting characters who are also searching for happiness, the author offers fascinating research on the definition of happiness. I enjoyed searching for the meaning of happiness with Sally and I think you will too.
Profile Image for Sara.
2,308 reviews14 followers
September 14, 2010
I read this a few years ago and really like it, but it didn't hold up as well upon re-reading. Story about a bored writer/wife/mother who, while writing a book about the history of happiness, searches for the missing piece in the wrong places.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews

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