The impact of war, and the lingering aftereffect it has on both veterans and civilians, is—for myriad reasons—largely invisible to the public. Popular media may create news cycles around horrors or stereotypes, but the effort required to redefine and sustain “normal” lives after war stays below the surface and out of sight.
In Retire the Colors, nineteen thought-provoking stories by veterans and civilians consider the residual effects of Iraq and Afghanistan. A pacifist describes her decision to accompany her husband, an Iraq veteran, to the shooting range. A hospital worker in Mosul talks about what happens on a hunting trip back home with his grandfather. A veteran experiences the 2013 Boston marathon. The wife of a combat medic considers their unusual nighttime routines. A mother and former 50 cal gunner navigates truth and lies with her children.
These stories offer a grace uncommon in war literature today. They also make an appeal to to witness with compassion the men and women who—because of war—possess the strength to show us what it means to be fully human.
Contributors Tahani Alsandook, Joseph R. Bawden, Brian Castner, David Chrisinger, David P. Ervin, Teresa Fazio, CH Guise, Colin D. Halloran, Lauren Kay Halloran, Matthew J. Hefti, Brooke King, Randy Leonard, Eva KL Miller, Stewart Moss, Caitlin Pendola, Mark Solheim, Richard Allen Smith, Christopher Stowe, and Melissa Walker.
“Retire the Colors” is a collection of non-fiction short stories by veterans of Iraq and Afghanistan as well as spouses and other civilians connected to those wars. In the stories, they try to make sense of the war, their duties, and especially their life after war. Among my favorites are “NUMB3RS” by Brooke King, gunner in Iraq, in response to a question by an old man, “How many have you killed?” She deftly ties the story to an animal hit on the side of the road after she is home with her children in the car. “You Don’t Have to Go There” by David P. Ervin, Operation Iraqi Freedom veteran, about car bombs in Iraq and trying to adjust after he returns home. It is a shortened version of his excellent book, “Leaving the Wire: An Infantryman’s Iraq” which I have read, attempting to understand the Iraq war and what the young men and women went through. “Listening for Home” by Teresa Fazio, a Marine Corp officer in Iraq, ties songs to her time in Iraq with her home life afterward.
All nineteen stories were well-written and thought provoking. Most involve PTSD and helped me to better understand the disorder. Having never been in the armed forces, it is hard for me to imagine what the soldiers go through and how they deal with the horrors of war. These stories give a good glimpse of the tough roads our veterans traverse during war and especially post-war.
Imagine transitioning from a life where an approaching vehicle likely holds enemy gunmen to a life where that same vehicle is, well, simply a car.
Or picture yourself diffusing explosives one day and then wrestling and tickling your children another.
These are some of the transitions that soldiers face when they leave active military service and return to civilian life. In many ways, the lives they have lived are a world apart. As expected, these transitions are not always easy.
Retire the Colors is a glimpse into the challenges faced by soldiers when it is time to come home. These are the stories of veterans, and in some cases civilians who work or live closely with veterans, told in their own words. The genuine voices, sometimes blunt, sometimes stark and often profound, explore not just the healing of bodies, minds and souls, but also the return to a world away from war.
It is a return often fraught with challenges. These veterans continue to battle, though these conflicts aren’t waged with guns. It is a fight for respect in the face of empty thanks. It is a war for recognition of just how much has been sacrificed and the weight they continue to bear. They wrestle for understanding both within themselves and from the world around them.
But these stories aren’t merely tales of trauma. They are also stories about finding purpose and joy in life after the military. For some that comes through a natural continuation of service in the police force. For others it comes in the form of art, through painting or poetry. And in some cases, the authors of these essays, men and women who have served their country, who have given up much for the many things we all take for granted, use these stories to reveal their hearts to us.
In his essay, Something on Something That’s Something like Disillusionment, Matthew J. Hefti, a 12 year veteran, writes “People are dying to be known, and too many die unknown.” That is a weighty observation on the human condition, one filtered through the lens of war but universally true and apt. These are not just essays about war and the soldiers who fight. They are observations about life. They are a gift, earned with blood, but given to us freely.
The introduction to the book ends with a call to help these veterans carry the load of their experience. We need to find better ways to help them with their transitions. But barring that, at the very least we need a better awareness of what these people have given and what they continue to give. Retire the Colors is an excellent place to start.
It's not easy to read about the affects of what our society has asked of our servicepeople , but they deserve our attention. It was emotionally difficult to read, but I kept turning pages and wanting more. Wanting to connect and understand.