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Doctor Who: Now We Are Six Hundred: A Collection of Time Lord Verse

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With illustrations by Russell T Davies, original showrunner of the new-era Doctor Who, the first ever Doctor Who poetry collection--a charming, funny and whimsical illustrated collection of verse that celebrates the joys and pitfalls of getting older . . . Time-Lord older.

Like many of us, the older they get, the more Time Lords realize how little they understand the universe around them. This delightful collection of poems--the first volume of Doctor Who verse published--offers moments of insight, wit, and reassurance for the maturing inhabitants of Gallifrey (and everywhere else), including such delights as:

THE END

When I was One

I was not much fun

When I was Two

I was barely through

When I was Three

I liked strong tea

When I was Four

I hated a bore

When I was Five

I was really alive

When I was Six

I somehow could never quite fit in to what was expected of me, well, not exactly but that was because things weren't neat and there are no easy rhymes in the universe and scansion, my dear Peri, is a thing that's really overrated and you only have to look at a sunset to realise that creation itself is a poem and oh no wait, got it, of course, Fix! The line needed to end with Fix!

(Or tricks. That's works too.)

When I was Seven

I sent the gods to Heaven

When I was Eight

Kissing was great

When I was Nine

I had forgotten time

When I was Ten

I began again

When I was Eleven

I totally got even

When I was Twelve, I became as clever as clever

And now I think I'll be Twelve for ever and ever*

(*Unless, of course, there is a terrible catastrophe involving explosions, radiation, or heights. And then I guess we'll find out what comes next. But the eyebrows won't be as good.)

118 pages, Hardcover

First published September 1, 2017

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365 people want to read

About the author

James Goss

231 books181 followers
James Goss has written two Torchwood novels and a radio play, as well as a Being Human book. His Doctor Who audiobook Dead Air won Best Audiobook 2010. James also spent seven years working on the BBC's official Doctor Who website and co-wrote the website for Torchwood Series One. In 2007, he won the Best Adaptation category in the annual LA Weekly Theatre Awards for his version of Douglas Adams' novel Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 89 reviews
Profile Image for Mark.
693 reviews176 followers
September 24, 2017
Now We Are Six Hundred is a set of fifty Doctor Who poems over 118 pages, loosely based upon AA Milne’s Now We Are Six.
 
Thus we have titles such as Contents (after “Happiness”) and The Five Doctors (after “The Three Foxes”). However I found this difficult, myself. I’m not sure that you can understand the full context and fully appreciate the play on the prose if you don’t know the original.  For example, compare these two:

 

Dalek                                                   Furry Bear (original)

If I were a Dalek                                 If I were a bear

And a big Dalek too                           And a big bear too

I shouldn’t much care                        I shouldn’t much care

If it froze or snew.                              If it froze or snew.

 

Admittedly, some of these poems are more complex than the above example would suggest: Here’s one, for example:

RETIRING

On days I don’t want to Doctor much
I worry that I shall lose my touch
All that running down those corridors
Thwartings of tyrants and dreadful bores
Brave rescues from the Foul Monster’s Lair
And firm trouncing all the Demons There.

Chaos never ends, oh that’s the shame
So yes I tire of just one more game.
Sometimes when the same old fight begins
I fear, just once, I’ll let Evil win.
And then, on second thought, perhaps I won’t
Because they’re Monsters, and so I don’t.
On days like that I don’t think at all
That being the Doctor’s so bad after all.

Which is based on this AA Milne poem (Knight in Armour):

Whenever I'm a shining Knight,
I buckle on my armour tight;
And then I look about for things,
Like Rushings-out, and Rescuings,
And Savings from the Dragon's Lair,
And fighting all the Dragons there.
And sometimes when our fights begin,
I think I'll let the Dragons win ...
And then I think perhaps I won't,
Because they're Dragons, and I don't.

 

Is it clever? Possibly. Does it work? Hmm. I suspect that, as ever with these things, you will either be left amused by the poem's riffing off the original, bemused by its content or, alternatively left wondering what all the fuss is about.

Some will appreciate that, whatever their original inspiration, the content of the poems is all Doctor, from the first incarnation until the twelfth. As well as the Doctor in most of his guises, there are poems that reference Daleks (see above example), The Master, the Adipose, The Toymaker and lots of others.

The poems are accompanied with a number of original illustrations by Russell T. Davies, the writer and former Executive Producer who brought the series back to life in its modern form in 2005. This was a little surprising, although evidently Russell spent much of his youth (when not watching Doctor Who) developing his comic artist skills. It was his colour-blindness that steered him away from a job of Graphic Design and instead led him to the role of Executive Producer of Doctor Who that he became.

As before, I think you will be either impressed or left nonplussed by his work. Generally the drawings, all in black and white, are very good, although not really to the standard of Milne’s artist E. H. Shepard.

 

In summary, how much you know Doctor Who or Now We Are Six will determine how much enjoyment you get from this book. I’m not sure if I can see fans quoting this at conventions myself, but you never know! I think you will need to either know, or have a copy of the Milne alongside, in order to get the full impact of this collection.

Whilst I think I know a fair bit about Doctor Who, even for me this was a bit of a curate's egg.  It's quaint, charming and all rather whimsical, but not for everyone. A collection for hard-core DW fans with a knowledge of AA Milne, perhaps. Or, as National Poetry Day is due on 28th September, a convenient and amusing trifle that could provide an entertaining hour or so for a Doctor Who fan.
Profile Image for Michael.
420 reviews28 followers
September 20, 2017
It's unfortunate how utterly disappointing this collection of poetry was. I guess I expected better poetry? There's hints of interesting ideas in this, like when they lovingly parody Winnie the Pooh, but for every moment of brilliance, there's two moments of trite, crummy poetry. It might have been better if more than one author contributed to the poetry, instead of one author having to write fifty Doctor Who related poems.

It's not that this book is bad, it's just not as good as it could've been.
Profile Image for Margaret.
Author 20 books104 followers
April 18, 2018
Cute idea, doesn't quite work.

Mostly because some of the poem adaptations don't scan correctly. Squeezing an extra syllable in to make a rhyme just annoys me.

Several were excellent and the book gets 3 stars on the basis of the Cottlestone Pie red0.
Profile Image for Ken.
2,562 reviews1,375 followers
April 14, 2018
A collection of poems loosely based on A. A. Milne’s ‘Now We Are Six’, those that know the original Winnie The Pooh verses will easily see the parallels.
The poems themselves are a little unremarkable.
My favourite being Full Stop, which featured all of the then current 12 Doctor’s.

The best thing about this collection is the illustrations, even the space pig from the televised story ‘Aliens of London’ looks remarkably like Piglet.
It’s worth reading the book just for the wonderful drawings alone.
Profile Image for Michael Mills.
354 reviews23 followers
October 9, 2017
5 out of 5 for the illustrations
2 out of 5 for the poems

Not that I was expecting a bit of novelty publishing to offer great poetry, but expection of weakness doesn't forgive it. There are a few that are fun and touching in their own ways (the "Foreward" and little story of the War Doctor and the mouse) but the hit rate is very low, and for the most part they feel like they were knocked off in pretty short order. Some of them, if I'm honest, don't even seem to make that much sense (but perhaps I'm not engaging in a close enough reading)...

description

The illustrations from Russell T Davies are a joy, however, and worth the price of admission alone. The wit and insight of his writing is every bit as evident here, with cartoons that are gorgeous to look at and also funny beyond the bounds of the poems they accompany (my personal favourites are the Celestial Toymaker conjuring up some real-life Doctor Who toys, and K9 as Snoopy).
Profile Image for Laura.
3,238 reviews101 followers
March 8, 2018
If you grew up on "Now we were six" and "When we are very young", by A.A. Milne, and if you also grew upon watching Doctor Who (or caught it later in life), then you might enjoy this slim volume of parody poetry written byJames Goss, and illustrated by Russell T Davies, who wrote the first four seasons of the current run of Doctor Who.

But if you are unfamiliar with one or the other, or even both, I would stear clear of this book of mildly amusing poetry. And if you only know the recent incarnation of Doctor Who, then, oh half of the poems will leave you scratching your head.

As someone who can still quote A.A Milne's verse from memory, it was rather fun to seeing the turn of the phrases that were shown in this book. The verses follow the same patterns of the original, including, in some cases, the same words.

It isn't rip-roaring amusing. It is more the dry wit of the British in full flower. For example, here is part of the original The Kings Breakfast
The Queen said
“Oh!:
And went to
His Majesty:
“Talking of the butter for
The royal slice of bread,
Many people
Think that
Marmalade
Is nicer.
Would you like to try a little
Marmalade
Instead?”


And here is how this book approached it.
The Henchmen
They nodded
And went and told
The Assasin
"Don't forget you'd better make
The Doctor very, very dead
The Masked Assasin
Said slyly
"You'd better tell
His Majesty
That many people nowadays
Like democracy
Instead


So, this book is really for those who either love both A.A. Milne and Doctor Who, or love Doctor Who and must have every book written about the show. I think everyone else in the world will look at this book and kind of scratch their heads.
Profile Image for Sadena ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭*.
37 reviews1 follower
June 5, 2018
4/5. To be fair, I can’t say I understood all of the poems, mainly because I don’t remember or know a lot of old Who, but I liked this nevertheless. Some poems just captured my heart and the illustrations were, quite honestly, cute and beautiful. It was a fun, quick read and I would reccommend to any Doctor Who fans out there to read it.
Profile Image for Cale.
3,919 reviews26 followers
January 5, 2018
The 'about the author' section says "This is his first (and probably only) volume of poetry." I admire his willingness to admit that poetry is not his strong suit - I just wish I had seen that before I had stumbled through the 100 pages of poems that preceded that.
The book is a merger of Doctor Who and A.A. Milne's "Now we are Six" that presupposes the reader has extensive knowledge of both - many of the Who references eluded me and I've seen all of the new and about a third of the old. And I know poetry doesn't have to rhyme, but when you do try to make it rhyme and pair things like shocked her, fracture, interlocutors, and provocateur, you're failing.
The illustrations are done by Russell Davies, and they're... acceptable, I guess. Their quality varies greatly, and the best of them are hardly memorable. I think what it comes down to was that this was an experiment that just didn't pan out. I'm all for experimenting, but honestly I can't recommend this to anyone. I'm kind of shocked it got published. Unless you have all of 'Now we are Six' memorized, and can quote every Doctor Who by heart, and don't mind frankly painful poetry, this book is not going to bring you any pleasure.
Profile Image for Taksya.
1,053 reviews13 followers
December 8, 2017
Anche se si parla del Dottore e del suo universo, resta un libretto in rima (liberamente ispirato a Now We Are Six di A.A. Milne) e io non riesco mai veramente ad apprezzare rime o poesie.
I disegni di Russel T Davies sono simpatici e perfetti come accompagnamento al testo e, nel complesso, non riesco a dare una votazione troppo bassa.
Mi chiedo se, in versione audio, potrei trovarlo più gradevole.
Profile Image for Nicholas Whyte.
5,343 reviews209 followers
September 1, 2018
https://nwhyte.livejournal.com/3070704.html

A short collection of poems by James Goss, with illustrations by former show-runner Russell T. Davis, all more or less based on similar poems by A.A. Milne. The concept is very cute, and I like that fact that the subject matter of the poems bridges both Old Who and New Who. James Goss is one of my favourite Who writers. However, it didn’t entirely work for me - perhaps it is too long since I last read Now We Are Six.
Profile Image for Jason Wilson.
765 reviews4 followers
October 7, 2017
One of the odder but more delightful who tributes... you have to know your old and new who to get it all but the Milne modelling is nice and , like all nursery rhymes, sometimes the ditties are reflective of the series' darkest hours.....
Profile Image for Derelict Space Sheep.
1,375 reviews18 followers
October 30, 2017
42 WORD REVIEW:

By themselves Davies’ illustrations would make this a 4-star book, but the unmitigated celery stick of Goss’s verse (so-called) diminishes this to a dudgeon-inducing 1-star cash-in from the direst depths of e-space. Utterly unreadable to poets, Doctor Who fans and everyone else.
Profile Image for Jade Lopert.
202 reviews30 followers
June 5, 2018
This was a short fun book of novelty poetry about Doctor Who based on AA Milne’s When We Were Six. So it’s not exactly the best poetry you’ll ever read, but it doesn’t really matter. Again, it’s just fun and I enjoyed it quite a bit.
Profile Image for Jenn.
105 reviews4 followers
July 20, 2018
Some were pretty good, but several poems didn't flow at all. Still a nice read for any Doctor Who fans.
Profile Image for Katherine Sas.
Author 2 books35 followers
July 20, 2018
As many other reviews have said, the poems are very slight and don't scan properly, the whole thing is a bit of a novelty item.

But.

Those drawings, tho.
Profile Image for Thebruce1314.
953 reviews5 followers
September 3, 2018
Some (most, actually) of the poems in this book are pretty terrible. But the illustrations are delightful, and the end of the book was excellent, so I’m torn.
Profile Image for Raquel (Silver Valkyrie Reads).
1,627 reviews47 followers
August 17, 2019
Worth reading for the fun concept, but most of the poetry was not particularly interesting or engaging. I did enjoy these specific poems pretty well:

Retiring
The Hard Stair
The Happy Brig
To Anonymous
Steps
Rice Pudding
The Next Episode

Very little in the way of content issues, only thing I can think of is a passing reference to slave princesses and maybe their gratitude for being rescued, or something to that effect. Likely any child old enough to watch Dr Who would be perfectly fine with reading the poems.
Profile Image for Emily Wrayburn.
Author 5 books43 followers
November 7, 2024
The poem at the end about Verity Lambert was excellent and there were a few other gems but for the most part I was underwhelmed. I thought it would be like-for-like with the poems from When We Were Six but maybe about half of them are based on Milne poems and the rest are not (or at least, that is my assumption based on the fact that some of them had the Milne they were based on in brackets after the title, while others had nothing).
Profile Image for Ahmed K-masterly {Cruel Sanity}.
369 reviews21 followers
June 4, 2020
So lovely to find such a funny old stories..
"I went into a box and it wasn't a box. On the inside it was big, on the outside it was small. And it had a garden A swimming pool A library It wasn't like a box at all."

Doctor who _ James Goss
Profile Image for K.
645 reviews3 followers
February 19, 2024
元ネタを知らないというのもあんまり楽しいと感じられなかった要因だとは思うけれども。

それなりに楽しかったけれどむしろRTDのイラスト見るのが楽しかったかな。

でもまぁ全部読んだぜ。
1番最後のDWを作った女性プロデューサーのポエムが1番好きかも!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Katie.
71 reviews6 followers
August 15, 2019
A great idea that fell short for me. Almost all the “poems” had no flow to them.
Profile Image for Mary Arkless.
290 reviews1 follower
July 22, 2019
A sweet little book about The Doctor, his companions, his enemies. I'm not a big fan of poetry, but I love The Doctor. My husband gave me this book. I don't "get" all the poems, as I've only seen the rebooted Doctor Who starting with Christopher Ecclestone, and some of them refer to some of the older series. The illustrations by Russel T. Davies are all excellent.
Profile Image for Stefan Grieve.
980 reviews41 followers
August 6, 2019
Charming and delightful fusion of poetry and Doctor who, although I'd say would charm more the fans of the Doctor Who then pure poetry enthusiasts. Geeky references to Doctor who lore galore, past and present (and future, and all other) with poems cycling through a range of Doctor who history, time, place, themes and characters.
And also there are really quirky and delightful illustrations by former Doctor Who Russel T Davies, showing that he has quite the hidden talent.
Don't go into this thinking the poetry is going to blow your mind, as they are mostly simple, straight forward affairs, with forced rymes and uncomplicated structures.
Still if your a Doctor Who fan and don't mind a bit of poetry, this book is right up your multiversal alley!
Profile Image for travelgirlut.
988 reviews26 followers
January 21, 2018
This was a fun bit of poetry. There's a pretty even balance between poems about the old Doctors and poems about the new. This left me feeling a little left out since I've only watched the new series, with the exception of a few episodes of the old, but it wasn't completely foreign.

I was also a bit confused at first since I had no idea this book was based on a book of poems by A. A. Milne. I did a bit of Googling a few poems in and finally figured it out. I think you'd probably get more out of this if you were familiar with the original poems, which I am not.

But overall, a fun way to spend an hour or so.
Profile Image for Dawn F.
556 reviews99 followers
March 31, 2018
This is the cutest, funniest, saddest, loveliest little treasure. It truly encompasses everything Doctor Who (and even fans!). It doesn’t require any preknowledge of AA Milne’s Now We Are Six which was the source of inspiration for this collection of poems (at least I’ve never read it and I loved this) but you probably need a fair amount of Doctor Who knowledge to fully appreciate all the references. Read it and hug your Doctor.
Profile Image for Melanie.
249 reviews6 followers
June 19, 2019
An entertaining collection for any fan of The Doctor or indeed of Milne.
Profile Image for Hattie.
33 reviews
January 19, 2018
INcredibly clever and witty - full of injokes and tiny nods to the entire 50+ years of Doctor Who history. I loved it so much and couldn't stop giggling. In truth... most of the poems are really bad. So bad in fact that they're good. Definitely recommend :)

Wouldn't read if you're a hard core WTP fan and will get upset by desecration of the original poems :P
Profile Image for Kai Charles(Fiction State Of Mind).
3,208 reviews11 followers
October 17, 2017
A really fun book for Doctor Who fans. The poems are based on ones that would be very familiar to British fans so I spent some time researching and reading those as well. I also loved the illustrations
Displaying 1 - 30 of 89 reviews

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