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Drop the Rock: Removing Character Defects - Steps Six and Seven
A practical guide to letting go of the character defects that get in the way of true and joyful recovery.Resentment. Fear. Self-Pity. Intolerance. Anger. As Bill P. explains, these are the "rocks" that can sink recovery- or at the least, block further progress. Based on the principles behind Steps Six and Seven, Drop the Rock combines personal stories, practical advice, and powerful insights to help readers move forward in recovery. The second edition features additional stories and a reference section.
132 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 3, 2009
69 people are currently reading
115 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
January 4, 2023
Great book for those of us that recover thru 12 step, reading this was long overdue for me and provided a lot of insight on places I have been feeling "stuck" lately that are very tied up in step 7. I love that the book provides so many people experiences with 6 and 7.
Only real issue is that the audiobook version which I listened to on audible has a ton of glitches in it because it was not edited well.
Only real issue is that the audiobook version which I listened to on audible has a ton of glitches in it because it was not edited well.
October 11, 2023
I loved this book so much. Super helpful as someone in recovery. So many good take aways and actionable ideas/suggestions to try out. Getting sober from alcohol/drugs is really only the first step towards building a life you don’t want/need to escape from—this book deals with Steps Six and Seven, which help you deal w/ the parts of your personality which have been a (the) source of the chaos within and around you. Life (and sobriety, recovery, relationships, your attitude) gets so much better when you choose and practice better, healthier, more skillful ways of speaking and acting and reacting each day.
May 9, 2023
Drove me mad. Someone decided to write their own supposed (deeper?) summary of a simple clear book (Alcoholics Anonymous), basing their summary on some third party (Joe and Charlie) talks on said book, and another summary book (Twelve Steps Twelve Traditions) of the original book, with various other theories they have heard and made up....and ending up with something much more complicated than the original, and inventing extra unnecessary factors. Anyway, I was glad to have a chance to give it one star, but on the plus side it focussed my own thinking so it was a useful thing to read.
February 11, 2022
So often in meeting I hear people stumbling on how exactly to turn over your character defects. This book helps clarify the 6 & 7th steps. With many personal examples and easy to follow explanations I was able to see what my character defects are and how to go about making changes in my life. A must read for me.
March 12, 2023
March 2022: Excellent book for those of us in recovery. I will be reading this once a year, absolutely! Steps 6 & 7 are the ones I have mostly done by myself, rather than with my sponsor. Very well written, & very useful in my ongoing recovery.
March 2023: Excellent once again!
March 2023: Excellent once again!
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January 29, 2023"Recovery works by giving us daily insight into what we can do to remove what blocks us" (xv).
"The action of the Sixth and Seventh Steps culminates in dropping the rock--all the stubborn, grasping, stupid holding on to old patterns of behavior, thinking, and feeling that are harmful to our progress in recovery" (xv).
"The fact that I will daily question my willingness to change will increase my ability to be increasingly willing" (17).
"We must be willing to quietly move towards self-examination, rather than self-absorption" (20).
"I can now admit that most of my troubles stem from one large and glaring defect: self-centeredness. For how can I wallow in self-pity, weep over resentments, be sick with righteous anger, ache with envy, and tense up with fears and anxieties unless all my thoughts are exclusively on poor me?" (23).
"[12 Step is] a program of getting rid of things: uncovering, discovering, and discarding" (56).
"Humility is our acceptance of ourselves" (59).
"Self-centered fear is seen as the chief activator of our character defects. It can be stated that many of the faces of fear are character defects. Many of us tend to deny and sublimate fear, and it shows up in our lives as procrastination, greed, tardiness, overachievement, underachievement, poor diet , escape reading, self-pity, indecision, overspending, gossiping, lying, smoking, shyness, aggressiveness, bragging, and many more" (69).
"God can't help us remove our character defects if we keep practicing them" (82).
"I know for myself, I don't have built into my system many of the rational controls, stops and guards that other people have" (83).
"We don't recognize the help that comes our way every day. Trust is learning to see the help that is already available in our lives and knowing that more is being provided on a regular basis" (86).
"It's too easy to get stuck blaming our parents, which continues to make the past a reliable source of unhappiness. Our parents don't work the Steps for us" (88).
"If we stay in the worry tower of our indignation, we prevent the healing of past injuries by constantly licking our wounds (character defects) (88)."
"The action of the Sixth and Seventh Steps culminates in dropping the rock--all the stubborn, grasping, stupid holding on to old patterns of behavior, thinking, and feeling that are harmful to our progress in recovery" (xv).
"The fact that I will daily question my willingness to change will increase my ability to be increasingly willing" (17).
"We must be willing to quietly move towards self-examination, rather than self-absorption" (20).
"I can now admit that most of my troubles stem from one large and glaring defect: self-centeredness. For how can I wallow in self-pity, weep over resentments, be sick with righteous anger, ache with envy, and tense up with fears and anxieties unless all my thoughts are exclusively on poor me?" (23).
"[12 Step is] a program of getting rid of things: uncovering, discovering, and discarding" (56).
"Humility is our acceptance of ourselves" (59).
"Self-centered fear is seen as the chief activator of our character defects. It can be stated that many of the faces of fear are character defects. Many of us tend to deny and sublimate fear, and it shows up in our lives as procrastination, greed, tardiness, overachievement, underachievement, poor diet , escape reading, self-pity, indecision, overspending, gossiping, lying, smoking, shyness, aggressiveness, bragging, and many more" (69).
"God can't help us remove our character defects if we keep practicing them" (82).
"I know for myself, I don't have built into my system many of the rational controls, stops and guards that other people have" (83).
"We don't recognize the help that comes our way every day. Trust is learning to see the help that is already available in our lives and knowing that more is being provided on a regular basis" (86).
"It's too easy to get stuck blaming our parents, which continues to make the past a reliable source of unhappiness. Our parents don't work the Steps for us" (88).
"If we stay in the worry tower of our indignation, we prevent the healing of past injuries by constantly licking our wounds (character defects) (88)."
July 31, 2025
I really liked this book. What stood out most was that it focuses on character defects, not just alcohol. In fact, alcohol is barely mentioned—which made it easier for me to connect with the deeper spiritual and emotional work involved in recovery.
The idea that resonated most for me was the “act as if” principle. I may not be able to fully remove my character defects on my own, but I can act as if the change has already started—and let God take care of the rest. That mindset really helped me shift my approach to growth.
I also appreciated how much detail and thought the book gives to Steps Six and Seven. In the Big Book, these steps are covered in just a few sentences. The 12 & 12 gives them each a chapter. But Drop the Rock devotes an entire book to them, and it really deepens your understanding of what it means to become ready and then humbly ask for change.
Highly recommend this one for anyone working through the steps—especially if you’ve been stuck or feel like you’re just skimming past these two.
The idea that resonated most for me was the “act as if” principle. I may not be able to fully remove my character defects on my own, but I can act as if the change has already started—and let God take care of the rest. That mindset really helped me shift my approach to growth.
I also appreciated how much detail and thought the book gives to Steps Six and Seven. In the Big Book, these steps are covered in just a few sentences. The 12 & 12 gives them each a chapter. But Drop the Rock devotes an entire book to them, and it really deepens your understanding of what it means to become ready and then humbly ask for change.
Highly recommend this one for anyone working through the steps—especially if you’ve been stuck or feel like you’re just skimming past these two.
June 23, 2020
I had personally never heard the phrase 'drop the rock' before in my 6 + years of recovery. Truthfully, I do not believe it would have made of difference. This book reminded me of why it was I had such a hard time initially accepting AA as a way of quitting drinking, as a way to get support etc. When I finally did do the step work, and quite thoroughly I must admit, again my biggest stumbling block was the religious aspect of the program. This was replaced by my own interpretation and that is what finally gave me the strength to complete those steps.
Having said that, I found this book a strong return to that state of discomfort and hence the book was of no use to me.
This is not to say it cannot greatly help others though.
Having said that, I found this book a strong return to that state of discomfort and hence the book was of no use to me.
This is not to say it cannot greatly help others though.
July 15, 2022
I was given this book early in my second year of sobriety. After working through the twelve steps of AA I thought I knew it all. Then this book challenges many of the attitudes and ideals I still treasured. I balked. I thought “This is surely asking perfection of me.” So on the shelf it went. Now I am entering into my seventh year sober, and have reread this after completing my inventory and sharing it with a new sponsor. Thankfully God has done some work on me in the meantime. Upon my second reading, I was able to approach the topic with an open mind and willingness to give up my defects as they are revealed to me. This was a great read, deep study, and refreshing call to action that my program desperately needed!
March 6, 2023
This book was phenomenal in my opinion. While reading this book I realised just how ordinary of a person I am. It was a book that gave me the courage to ask the universe for humility. Motivated me to look inwards at where my behaviour was coming from and why it needed to change. Gave me a new perspective on uncertainty and unfamiliarity + risk taking for a new way of life. Wish I could give it more stars!!
November 25, 2024
I read this right when i needed to read it: “…after years in the program, things seemed to just have gone flat…drifted into a numb place where there seems to be little growth and little reason to change.”
It brought awareness that I need to rejuvenate my growth process. A worthy read for anyone who glossed over the 6th & 7th step, as I did!
It brought awareness that I need to rejuvenate my growth process. A worthy read for anyone who glossed over the 6th & 7th step, as I did!
March 4, 2021
Sharing our experience is what is done in the AA program. This book gives suggestions and guidance about the importance and usefulness of truly working the 6th and 7th Steps. This would also be helpful for anyone working a 12 Step program.
August 3, 2021
I loved this book. It is by far the best book on steps 6 & 7 that I have read in the 5 years I have been in recovery. I have only a few things I disagree with. But that is not specific to this book it is the way the steps are talked about in regards to a faith works type of faith.
May 7, 2024
Another tool in the Spiritual toolkit.
I enjoyed this book enormously.
It's format captured me and I learned a lit from it. I will continue to reread it and apply it to my personal recovery journey.Thank you.
I enjoyed this book enormously.
It's format captured me and I learned a lit from it. I will continue to reread it and apply it to my personal recovery journey.Thank you.
December 29, 2024
A book I've been meaning to read for a long time, and I'm so glad I did. It's full of deep questions and gems like "It is courage that turns possibilities into realities." I'm going to drop the rock as best I can!!
February 17, 2018
Definitely helped deepen my understanding of Steps 6 and 7, but there were a lot of religious stories that, to me, didn't add too much and could have been left out.
August 6, 2020
Excellent book for those in recovery from addictions. Goes into great detail on character defects and how to deal with them. Very informative and useful book. Will read again.
October 22, 2020
Very practical guide to two steps that are too often glossed over in recovery programs. Excellent use of personal examples.
October 5, 2021
An overdue deep dive on steps given short shrift in the Big Book and 12 and 12. Very worthwhile. I am sure this will be read again and again
October 23, 2021
Eye opening. I had a lot of revelations while reading this book. The last 20 pages hit me like a brick.
September 30, 2022
Exactly what I needed :)
May 8, 2023
Great book. Read it and let go
April 28, 2024
Great Book
I have read this book today after putting it off for years and I wish I read it back then. Thank you for the book and thank you for recovery.
I have read this book today after putting it off for years and I wish I read it back then. Thank you for the book and thank you for recovery.
August 6, 2024
Very good discussion of Steps 6 and 7 - bears some serious reflection.
August 15, 2024
Going to put this in my rotation
October 4, 2024
A must-read for anyone in recovery or for anyone that just needs to have some release for everyday worries and burdens.
February 27, 2025
Solid insight. When I read it, I looked at it through the lens of “take what you want and leave the rest.”
February 19, 2020
Excellent book for those working the 12 steps and ready to work on six and seven!
October 17, 2018
If you're working The Steps 6/7, knowing the principles and willingness to learn what's in this book may be, for you, like or was for me -- beyond material. Done!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews